I totally agree with you. Unfortunately, churches, in the home or schools are not teaching or emphasizing blacks to have a family, be responsible and marry. Slavery is still taking place in the black man’s mind. Wake up brothers. Black women, Indian men are great! Pay Attention to them black women.
yes black women do deserved to be cared for and protected, and loved and provided for but a man don,t have to do this if a women is not his wife or mom or sister.
The best way to be valued is not having a hood dudes kids, not spending your 20s being sexually loose, preferring productive men over dudes who are exciting. This alone would change black womens lives
@@corrineperry5523They don’t seem to care about you or your struggles with your kids. At least my family didn’t. I even tried to get help from the church I was attending. No real help. That’s what I went through. I did the best I could raising my son alone. I tried so hard to be both mother and father. I couldn’t be both effectively. Didn’t work. He’s dead now. The culture and and streets took him. He seemed to want that kinda life more.
I met a 49 year old navy veteran black man who has been divorced for 6 years who told me that he wants to have s3x with multiple women at this point in his life. I kindly dismissed myself from his life. (I appreciate his honesty) Sometimes you just have to choose you.
@smartkookie and @Geneka737...Smart move, ladies! There are some BW who opt to stay involved with such men, despite being forewarned. I applaud you both on using your God-given sense and exiting stage left...far away from men who have no control over their libidos. I view men like the ones both of you encountered as weaklings. You both deserve better men than these! 💯
Ladies if you want to be a wife , move as a wife , don't be a girl friend because they are play things for players . If you want a white man for a husband keep in mind we move slower in our approach . We like the dance of the back and forth interaction because charm and respect is our cultural core . FYI , All men fetishize women in every culture ! We are made 80% visual and made by God in His image , We hunt by sight ! White men have traveled the world and find Beauty in everything and every woman from every Contenant but if a man gives you the creeps it's probably spiritual so just keep your guard up . @Rebecca Lynn Pope , You look lovely and I can see Carry's love and Covering as a good Husband at work in your life 100% .
My wife was smarter, richer and better than me but I didn't know how much till 20 years later of being happily married. She moved like a wife and still does.
For those concerned about fetishization from other communities: BM fetishize us too, which is why there are more baby mamas than wives in our community. Properly vet the men first, but simply go where you are loved and appreciated!
I am 52 years old and today is my 17th wedding anniversary. My husband is white and we met at work 18 years ago while working at a bank up North. We have a 10-year-old son and he is the light of our lives. I have told many of my single black, female friends to look outside of their race for a partner but they usually don’t want to do that. They are waiting for something that may never happen. I tell them that love is love, no matter what color you are. You can wait around and be alone or you can open up your eyes and your heart and find true love. I am at peace living my soft life down here in Florida. I pray that my sisters find the same peace, love and happiness as I have. Life goes by so fast, live it to the fullest.
Let me help you. You are not the only woman in America with a happy marriage and a good husband. More importantly, there is nothing magical about your husband being white that has anything to do with him being a good husband. He is a good husband because he is a good man to you and your child. My parents were married for 60 years both black. All 3 of my sisters have been married for 20 years plus and they got married in their 20s not there mid-thirties like yourself. They are married to black men. So there is nothing magical about your white husband I'm sorry to tell you madam. A good husband is a good husband and race has nothing to do with it
Hopefully you will find the same good man that msshay has. I wish that for you since you're hoping to find the men your sisters are with. I bid you lots of luck and fortune sweety with your chase, I really do. lol Remember he's a good man. 😏😜😘 @@alwaysreliable3
@alwaysreliable3 : Youvare absolutely 100% correct. She's acting like because she's with a white man in Florida, she's hit the jackpot. They don't even want black people in Florida.
This was a hard pill to swallow for me, but you tell no lies. I’ve done so much healing as to where I’m in a very good place. But I can’t tell you the number of black men I’ve run into that are hurting and so unhealed, won’t get healed and don’t think they have a problem. My desire is marriage so I’m now ready to open my options because it’s been a real struggle with black men. I will always love our people, but their disdain towards us is really showing, so my loyalty is now to myself!
Just about everything she said was a lie. The data was false. As we're the assumptions. And she manipulating yall too. Non black men arent interested in yall in mass. And if they are. Enjoy. But they aren't.
I think the problem lies in your diction used in the comment. You and many BW place yourself on pedestals, talking about serving you......just wow. Some women deserve everything, others do not, and majority don't. That's another issue, so many chicks think they deserve something coming with baggage just because they have a wet hole.
I’m 42. I’ve been married for 14 years and together 21 years. When I got tired of being sick and tired, I prayed. The most unselfish prayer entered my heart. I said “God, regardless of his race, Creed, or color…I just want MY husband”. At a young age something clicked. I handle some bills in my house, but by God’s grace and mercy, my husband carries the big load. He always tell me, if he ain’t stressed, then I don’t need to stress. We gotta beyond ourselves and these ridiculous time limits and standards.
Rebecca’s right. Every Black man I dated was college educated and childfree, but they all had emotional stuff it wasn’t my responsibility to wade through. My current partner has the above and more - he’s done his emotional work, and he’s truly prepared to step into the next phase of life. Many men don’t work on accessing or processing emotions; when you find one that does, pay attention.
@Jay C I think it's all the same for the most part. Other males might be willing to marry, but that doesn't mean they treat their wives correctly. Too many other women have the same complaints as single bw. I truly believe too many males are emotionally unavailable and unlikable. Because you guys have been bred to compete and survive. So obviously it will hit the so called black race the hardest because that's the program.
First of all that’s pure nonsense if you think other races of men don’t have emotional issues. But keep thinking that! Every race has emotional issues just different based on certain historical aspects. Now black women and emotional issues boy that’s another story. Many BW have not sought professional counseling due to pride and stubbornness. Yes that’s right. They think even in their dysfunction they are still queens and divas but many are horribly broken! And not from good black men! But from the dogs they have chosen to lay down with for some quick fun!
Divorce is never the way out, My wife and I have been having issues before I sort out help from a spiritual adviser,i wasnt going to let my marriage of 18years crash
I’ve never had a type when it came to race. I struggled with having my type being a good man. My past relationships I had to experience because they’re were life lessons I needed to learn. These experiences have taught me what to look for and how boundaries are important. Right now I’m getting to know a man that’s not black and also older than me. I have to admit its been a great experience . He’s Respectful, understanding and a complete gentleman. He opens up to me when it comes to life and experiences. He says I understand him and how he just ends up telling me everything. What I take from this is Good men need Safety and nurturing femininity is significant.
SIMPLE/ EASY: stop chasing Tyrone/Pookie/Rae Rae and stop belittling good black men. You seem to only notice them when they marry other races. And all you do then is shame them. PS: if you date outside the race, will you then Chase chad? If so, good luck 🍀✌️
I think you are 100% correct, that real love does not come in a particular color. I want to love, be loved, taken care of, honored, respected, protected,provided for, all of that. I've NEVER had any of that. Thank You for simply telling the truth.
@@MissAmeriNegro I meant in general. We have to be comfortable walking away sooner if we have expressed your needs and they are not being met. Sometimes women stay too long in relationships that are not serving them.
All these black men in the comments are having a problem with what I said in this video without even listening to it. If so, they would realize that I gave honor to all of the wonderful and strong black men in our community. Just like my previous videos where I show love to our strong black men who are great husbands, fathers, and leaders. There's just not enough marriage-minded, spiritual, and emotionally healed black men to match the women who desire marriage and are doing the real work to be healed. This video is for that demographic of women. These women are my audience, my tribe. That's who I'm assigned to and really the only women I make content for. Period. I ignore comments from anyone that God didn't assign me to. Blessings and Abundance everyone. ❤
Rebecca, where are the stats you are talking about? We all are waiting for the stats? TH-camr Medium Man made a response video, with an excellent breakdown of actual stats. He takes your arguments, claims and points and dissected them step-by-step. 😅 You are setting up these BW to become easy targets for predators. This is on you, this is on your hands whenever something happens. As of now BW have 1.5 million babies out of wedlock by non-BM! and that is per CDC! "Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015". (Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018) These out of wedlock children by non-BM are considered Black according to the census bureau. Yet it’s BM who they claim for the absentee. “The percentages were similar for non-Hispanic black (46.6%).” (Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, 2018) "Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015". (Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018) “More than half of Black business owners are men The gender divide among all U.S. business owners extends to Black or African American business owners, though by a smaller margin. Among all U.S. firms whose ownership is classifiable by gender, 63% were majority-owned by men in 2020, while 22% were owned by women and 15% had equal male-female ownership that year. By comparison, 55% of majority Black- or African American-owned businesses in 2020 had male owners, while 37% were owned by women and 8% had equal male-female ownership.” (Source: PEW, A look at Black-owned businesses in the U.S., FEBRUARY 21, 2023) National Center of Education Statistics in 2019. The gap is greater still at higher education levels: only half as many Black men have a Master’s degree (4%) as Black women (9%), white men (8%) and white women (13%): ” (Richard V. Reeves, Sarah Nzau, and Ember Smith, Brookings Institute, The challenges facing Black men - and the case for action (2020), Black women are earning more college degrees, but that alone won’t close race gaps (2017) So the margin of error is around 5% between academic educated Black men and Black women. We have to take into consideration that Black men come from mass incarceration in the 90s. And close to 50% of Black men is exonerated. Whereas Black women was given Title IX and Title IV. If one cannot understand these dynamics, one is in a sad situation. Black men had to come from far to catchup, after things like mass incarceration happened. In 2023 we can say the incarceration of Black men has dropped with 34%. "The nation’s imprisonment rate is at its lowest level in more than two decades. The greatest decline has come among black Americans, whose imprisonment rate has decreased 34% since 2006." (Source: PEW research center, may 6 2020, Black imprisonment rate in the U.S. has fallen by a third since 2006). In all actually the amount of Black people within the total population in prison is around 5%. Anyway, look for the Medium Man channel, so he can school you a bit more.
Rebecca, where are the stats you are talking about? We all are waiting for the stats? TH-camr Medium Man made a response video, with an excellent breakdown of actual stats. He takes your arguments, claims and points and dissected them step-by-step. 😅 You are setting up these BW to become easy targets for predators. This is on you, this is on your hands whenever something happens. As of now BW have 1.5 million babies out of wedlock by non-BM! and that is per CDC! "Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015". (Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018) These out of wedlock children by non-BM are considered Black according to the census bureau. Yet it’s BM who they claim for the absentee. “The percentages were similar for non-Hispanic black (46.6%).” (Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, 2018) "Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015". (Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018) “More than half of Black business owners are men The gender divide among all U.S. business owners extends to Black or African American business owners, though by a smaller margin. Among all U.S. firms whose ownership is classifiable by gender, 63% were majority-owned by men in 2020, while 22% were owned by women and 15% had equal male-female ownership that year. By comparison, 55% of majority Black- or African American-owned businesses in 2020 had male owners, while 37% were owned by women and 8% had equal male-female ownership.” (Source: PEW, A look at Black-owned businesses in the U.S., FEBRUARY 21, 2023) National Center of Education Statistics in 2019. The gap is greater still at higher education levels: only half as many Black men have a Master’s degree (4%) as Black women (9%), white men (8%) and white women (13%): ” (Richard V. Reeves, Sarah Nzau, and Ember Smith, Brookings Institute, The challenges facing Black men - and the case for action (2020), Black women are earning more college degrees, but that alone won’t close race gaps (2017) So the margin of error is around 5% between academic educated Black men and Black women. We have to take into consideration that Black men come from mass incarceration in the 90s. And close to 50% of Black men is exonerated. Whereas Black women was given Title IX and Title IV. If one cannot understand these dynamics, one is in a sad situation. Black men had to come from far to catchup, after things like mass incarceration happened. In 2023 we can say the incarceration of Black men has dropped with 34%. "The nation’s imprisonment rate is at its lowest level in more than two decades. The greatest decline has come among black Americans, whose imprisonment rate has decreased 34% since 2006." (Source: PEW research center, may 6 2020, Black imprisonment rate in the U.S. has fallen by a third since 2006). In all actually the amount of Black people within the total population in prison is around 5%. Anyway, look for the Medium Man channel, so he can school you a bit more.
No problem at all. But we aren't the only ones seeing this video other men from other races see this stuff too, yall forget that your posting to for anyone to see. What it sounds like is that your telling black women to give up on their preference and go for someone else outside the community. I'm cool with that, I did it too but what you don't see it the way your framing it. Men see this and see themselves in the eyes of a black woman as second choice. Basically "she's only with me because she can't get a black man" no man worth anything is going to be settled for especially if he's got his own community he can be with. Yall basically think so highly of yourselves that you think you'd be doing a white,asian,latino man a favor by dating him? Baby boo have you looked at the data? Because you'd be the lucky one but hey yall do what yall want cause cats out of the bag now and we ain't ever going back to America. ✌️
@@danielisaac7586ou are spot on. Im latino and I interpreted the video like you do. I'll take it a step further, it seemed to me this video's message is: black men are not enough, it is their fault, their struggles and trauma, so seek men outside the race.
@@bplayerr1 yeah that's what these types of women put out and think other men who got plenty of women of their own to choose from are going to pick a older black woman with attitude. Nope. When you wanna be accepted in a different culture you gotta change not the othrt way around but black woman won't do that for anyone and basically think they are made of gold. Hey if they are good for them but alot of them are ending up alone so it is what it is data doesnt lie and while yes black men are second from last as far as being seen as attractive (I believe it goes white first hispanic second and arab third) we can still find women since we don't mind dating down no man does actually. But these women with wigs on their heads think the are gonna date out and a rich white guy is gonna pick them? Have they seen how rich white women look? They're delusional and their own hypergamy will take them out of the gene pool. So I guess it's a problem that will eventually solve itself 👍
Times have really changed Olivia. I used to watch you 6 years ago when I was single. I used your advise back then and got married. I am divorced now but have learned so much. This is a completely different conversation 6 years later. Social media has destroyed black men and women.
The black culture has been on the course of destruction since the mid eighties. Social media has excelarate in the disfunction and the destruction of our community.
Seventy percent of women the divorce That's not going to change all you want. Is the image of a wedding as soon as it is done? You don't want to put in. Any? Of the. Work? To have. A good? Relationship and believe that it. Must? Be perfect. This is why men are not going to waste their time getting married to you. You can do this with another race because you don't treat them the same as you treat. Black man
I don’t see any other race of ppl encouraging interracial dating, but black ppl. Black men/women over look good potential mates all the time due to superficial things. Secondly, the grass ain’t greener other races are just as jacked up. We have to tend to our own garden first. Therapy, reprogramming, healing, and prayer is definitely needed in our community 🙏🏿🙏🏿
@@naturallybeautiful9109..but that’s his point. People in our community PASSING UP on potential because he don’t have “the bag”. Or she’s not “fit”. News flash.. only 18% of white men make over 100k (compared to 8% of black men). And the VAST majority of women (in general) are “overweight”. It’s called priorities.
Please understand, Studies show that black women do better when they marry white men. In fact, they only have a 3% divorce rate when they marry white men. On the other hand, black men have an 89% divorce rate when they marry white women.
I've been married for 20 years and I'm so blessed by my husband. He truly leads me toward the best things in life. I want other Black women to be able to experience that too if they want. Yes, he is white. His values, morals, and character were more important than his race.
Rebecca articulated this truth so well. It’s so hard for me to find non black men attractive so I’m definitely praying for an open heart. In the same vein, this hurts because I really thought I’d have a good, black husband by now. I’m 39…no prospects at all, no dates and no DMs! I believe I’m great and attractive but it doesn’t matter lol!
Start paying attention to Indian men. Janice Hilton had said this but I thought she was crazy. Not anymore. Very attractive, family oriented and faithful.
@@theadvancedforce1017 I never said nor did I hear anyone else say that other races are better than the bm. It’s sad how we (bw and bm are blaming each other. Blame never resolve the issues. We all need to first start with self. I believe the woman reflect the man. God is awesome. He uses women to help the man see how he is doing. If he doesn’t like what he sees he has the power to change what’s reflected. Don’t blame. It all started in the beginning. Be blessed! I
What is so desirable about black males? When you measure the character of a good human and then a man; a person of courage; a person of integrity, do black males even qualify?
Black women can attain a successful marriage by prioritizing self-love and self-care while actively seeking partners who value and respect them. It is important to set standards and boundaries for healthy relationships and to engage in open and honest communication with potential partners. Building a strong support network and seeking guidance from mentors or therapists can also provide valuable insights and guidance throughout the process. Additionally, actively participating in personal growth and self-improvement can contribute to building a strong foundation for a successful marriage. Remember, success in marriage is not solely determined by race but rather by nurturing a loving and respectful partnership based on shared values, effective communication, and mutual support.
I completely agree with you. I am also glad I am in a position where I collect data for a living, along with studies and being able to connect with other races of men and women I can tell you that white women, Hispanic women etc have the same issues and they will tell you that. You have to trust God in this area, and that’s not always easy.
**** WE ALREADY HAVE RESPECT AND LOVE BY MANY BLACKS >>> AND WE LOVE OUR WOMEN>>> AND U ARE DOING BLACK MEN A TERRIBLE SERVICE BY SELLING THIS EVIL CURSE>>> DONT TRY TO BE A MATCHMAKER ..LET THE LORD DO HIS WORK AND HE DONT NEED NO HELP>>> PLEASE STOP *****IF THEY ARE NOT MARRIED MAYBEE THEY HAVE SOMETHING TO LEARN BEFORE MARRIAGE 8**
I am a black female and i have been married for a long time. When i met my black husband i was 23 years old..and i was dating a white man. He was so good to me but then i met my husband. He was such a good attentive man for 15 years. After that honey he started switching up on me. He even told me that he ONLY did everything for me so he wouldn’t lose me. Not because he loved me and that’s what he wanted to do. Pick wisely ladies.
How horrible, you monkey branched from a good man to another good man that put a ring on it and has been there for 23 yrs and somehow you are the victim!!
Have "HUMILITY" wherever you go. There are IMMUTABLE UNIVERSAL LAW that don't Bend to nobody no matter how supposedly Righteousness they are. Coming from a Black man in a Wealthy loving Relationship with a Black woman.
Thank you. I’m so happy that reputable people are saying these things out loud. Because when I or other quality black women who are single say the same thing, we get met with - oh you’re just damaged, you’re not thinking positively, oh you want too much, you shouldn’t have gotten all that education and just stayed basic. It’s exhausting.
Men been saying this but black women do not listen. too masculine. choosing to let random pookies use them up like pookies personal urinals and toilet bowls, and the list goes on. BW, like most women, cannot see from a man's point of view.
Say it LOUDER for the people in the back!!!! AMEN!!! I’ve been telling my friends this for years!! Me…. I’ve been married 24 yrs to my non-black husband. 3 kids and VERY happy. Broaden your horizons sistas. The men do all the time!!
Hey, I can see why you had options but that's not going to work for most. You look relatively young on this picture and if you got married 24 years ago, I take it that you looked even younger than now. The point is Non White men aren't going to marry overweight sisters. The ones that look like yourself or Rebecca will certainly have options but trust if the options were there for most...it would be a mass exodus a long time ago...:) congrats though. I'll be at 29 years next weekend myself to a Black woman with two kids. :) The important thing is to stay in your lane. I don't mean race, I mean your Lane. Don't be out asking for something you don't qualify for.
@@bernardtim1776 I'm black and did bikini competition last summer and non black men are interested in a toned fit black woman... I'm in relationship now with a young man. I got him into body building. We support each other well. Just returned from vacation in Italy.
@@wello5839 I agree...the ones that are fit and toned are clearly the prettiest in the world. The problem is most aren't fit. The stats show that and those are the ones complaining about not being able to find good men. The ones that are fit get hit on daily by men from all walks of life. You can attest to that so my point is women that look like yourself or Rebecca need to stop lying to the ones that are obese telling them to open their options...You lose options when you are 50 or 100 pounds over weight...or have kids....that's just a fact. So she was dead wrong for that part of the video. She's got a big as ring on and truth is men are going to hit on her married with the ring on and walk right past a woman dragging kids or very huge women. Now...there are plenty of men that will have them...but not the men they are trying to get. Again, I see large white women everyday walking into the Walmart with men that adore them....they just aren't the so called upper society part of men.
A woman should never give up her independence. It is crucial that she always be able to support herself. I am a family law attorney, and I have seen so many instances of women being in horrible situations once they become dependent on a man. They have a harder time getting out of abusive situations because they cannot support themselves. And, even if they leave, they have no money and no way to make it on their own. Many times the husband will take all the money, stop making her car payment, stop paying for her phone, etc. She is essentially left high and dry. Marriage is a wonderful institution, but in this modern world a woman should never become dependent on a man financially.
Ive been with 3 good woman in my life and currently in a relationship with one of them. Those were 1 black woman, 1 indian woman, and 1 mixed white and hispanic. Black women i tell you this date the MAN that is the best for you dont matter what race. Find someone who is willing to move at the same pace same goes for the men. This is best dating advice i ever got and its the only advice you'll ever need.
I agree with this message for the most part, but I also think some BW overlook good men for superficial reasons. You addressed this a few years ago. I have a good one who some would overlook immediately because he’s under 6 feet, works in a blue collar field, and misspells some words ( highly intelligent when it comes to science and math).
Excellent and truthful loving message! I know so many bw who exclusively wanted a bm and grew old by themselves. They are still waiting. The bm of comparable age still don't want to commit, and they are in their late fifties, sixties. well into seventies. When they consider committing its because the cucumber doesn't work or they are physically ill.
I work in the criminal legal field and I can honestly say that we’ve lost A LOT of our men of all ages due to being imprisoned or having been ended by another Black man. Many of the Black male attorneys are either already married or uninterested in marriage but are on the baby daddy train. It’s crazy, frustrating and disappointing 😣
Black men are hurting and wounded and bleeding all over us, but they are covering their wounds with ego and denial. Only God can start to mend their hearts. Our job is to be a prayer warrior and push the enemy back. We have to stand on the side lines and fight this spiritual battle. We cannot let this generational battle continue to divide the black community. We are a force when we work together. But we as black women also have be open to whoever God provides for us. Let God lead with our partnership selection.
They have to fight for themselves. A lot of them don’t even go to church. Churches are filled with single BW and even married BW fighting for them spiritually. God helps those who help themselves
Look, degrees are icing on the cake. They signal you are capable of learning and having a decent job. But it is not even close to the priority. Men care more about your feminine qualities and skills. Period. I'm a black woman who got married recently and to a non-black man (not that it matters). I know. Feminity (inner and outer) is what will get that life commitment from a quality man.
Thank You Rebecca for this MESSAGE! 🙌🏽 WE as BLACK WOMEN Need to recognize OUR WORTH and know that we are WORTHY of a PROVIDER MAN/HUSBAND just like every other race of WOMEN!
Here’s the problem, a lot of blk women minds are F’ed up and y’all think another group of ppl want to mix with all that trauma. This is crazy af. Go heal 1st.
Fist you and ms. pope need to STOP this "provider husband" nonsense. Go to the U.S. Census report JUST finished a few years ago SEVENTY TWO PERCENT OF WHITE HOUSEHOLDS, have TWO working adults. So White boy ain't providing NOTHING but his share of the bills they are paying JOINTLY. This is data, not the words of a random therapist or "matchmaker," with no sources, data or facts. MOre data for you, WHITE MEN are not even marrying THEIR OWN anymore, so what makes you think they are going to marry you? For the first time in history marriage in America with white folks is UNDER 50% (48%) - Pew Research Center. DIVORCES for the first time in history, including a dramatic increase over 50, is over 50% (National Insittue Of Health) So please STOP with the "just like every other race of women," IT IS NOT TRUE. Finally BW have the LOWEST rate of marrying out of any group in AMerica Asians 35%, Latinos 28%, BW 10%. This is a pipe dre3am and a nonworkable solution at a time where marriage within the White group is going down, and certainly the desire to marry into a group with 73% of the families single mothers. Get real
I finally came to a realization yesterday, that I'm now open to not just dating black men, it's been a long time coming for me to come to that conclusion! Thank you Aunt Rebecca ❤️❤️❤️
I'm just not gonna date. Men are trash in general and my body relaxed and became un-anxious as soon as I admitted to myself that this might be my reality. Tbh my huge funky, depressive mood didn't start until I began thinking that I'll be single and child-free.
I had WW tell me I was silly for being BM only. They were good friends and colleagues who looked at me like I was crazy. Flat out told me my life would be easier and sweeter with a WM. WW said this to my face.
SIMPLE/ EASY: stop chasing Tyrone/Pookie/Rae Rae and stop belittling good black men. You seem to only notice them when they marry other races. And all you do then is shame them. PS: if you date outside the race, will you then Chase chad? If so, good luck 🍀✌️
I do believe that we as Black Women should keep an open mind. However remember there are a lot of unhealed Men. I have met Non-bLack Men with Mommy issues and many other issues. So ladies please vet ALL Men. Do not assume because he is Non-black he is "better".
Wow Rebecca, you were preaching girl! I desire marriage and have been open to dating outside my race for years now BUT I will only marry under the circumstance that I am with a man who loves and adores me and will fully provide and protect me and our future children! I WILL NOT marry or procreate under ANY OTHER CIRCUMSTANCES!
Thank you for having the courage to speak about this challenge for black women. I definitely needed to hear this!!! Your message was confirmation on my decision to begin opening my options!!!
After that public display of mamming that Iyanla did and tried to get eboni brown, to accept dating a bus driver, I now know officially that black women aren't suppose to want the best or look for it. It's ok for women of other races to have desires and go for their "dream guy" and often times, can get it. But black women?? We should shut up and eat whatever crumbs, life throws us, and be satisfied with that. And that's no way to live.
A Black Pastor said back in the 80's said if Black Men don't self correct and match Black Women, Black Women will surpassed them and they have no way to be equally yoked. This was back in 1980!!
Loved this topic. Something that I need to consider as I'm listening to you while cutting the grass. LOL This is getting so old sis. Yes, its great exercise to do yardwork, but my mother, who is now a widow after being married 34 years, NEVER cut the grass. I'm eager and ready to be the Godly wife I know I'm destined to be and to live a life that is even more of an ease and flow than it currently is.😊
Did your mom work? How early was she married? Did she "date around" in her 20s? Did she have a spiritual compass? See...the indulgence of being a "modern woman" is just coming back to bite us.....there is some truth is what she says but is there ANYTHING that BW need to work on to be better mates or is it ALWAYS someone else's fault?
@rodneyhughes5299 Yes, my mother worked. She was an educator and is now retired. My mother had me at age 28 and was married 1-2 years by then. Yes, she's a woman of faith (Christian) and she and my dad were high school sweethearts (my dad was two years older), but took a slight break while they were in college and got back together, so they definitely dated others. And yes, women AND men can both work on things individually to be better partners. I'm not saying I'm perfect by any means. I just thought that I would have met that special someone by now organically. It just seems like meeting a nice guy is a job within itself and that our parent's generation had such an easier time.
This is so frustrating to hear. As a man, I hear the cry of my sisters, and there is real pain in our community. However, this advice is only a bandaid and will not fix the problem. In one breath 23:40 (I absolutely agree), you say men are looking for a woman that brings "love, comfort, joy, partnership, peace, compassion, understanding, and nurturing". BUT at 15:10, you say what black women are focusing on: "Education, income, and courses." Our sisters are not focusing on the qualities that make them ATTRACTIVE to men; they focus on the qualities that make them ATTRACTED to men. As a man, I cannot say, "I must meet a good black woman to be in my masculine." I must BE that good masculine man in order to attract her. Similarly, a woman must BE feminine to attract the kind of man she wants; otherwise, she will keep repelling men of EVERY race. There is a reason why black women are statistically at the bottom of the desirability list when it comes to dating apps, and it has nothing to do with black men. And to anecdotally counter the ‘gay men at the gym’ argument, I RARELY see any black women in there ever. I see Asian women and white women. Peace and love ❤️
Come to my city here in Michigan. We get it in at the gym. But also in yoga, Pilates, spin classes…fitness classes. Try to keep in mind, the gym isn’t the only place to get fit. Would love to see more brothas in yoga- it’s great for mind health and so much more. ☺️
TREMENDOUSLY WELL SAID TRUTH, im a black Man, and I definitely agree that bw dating out will not solve their problems, also bm are not the blame or issue, but I hope bw find what they're looking for, God bless em 🙏🏽!!!!!
I totally agree 100%. I just asked someone recently not to refer to me as a strong black woman. It is not a compliment to me. We need to remove that because mentally you began to think you need to li e up to it even if it drives you crazy, then you angry. No no....not me. Ans how about we are the only culture that are critiqued from the tip of our heads to the bottom of our feet. And some of us jump on the bandwagon. Not good ladies. Stop letting men and society judge your character based on hair, make up, nails.
People wanting to place blame and insist that it is the fault of BM or BW, when both genders have contributed to the downfall of black relationships. It would be nice if we would stop being distracted with that argument and start being a part of the solution. That starts with healing and therapy, which most are not willing to do.
Best comment! I’m a guy and totally agree. Both sides be playing the blame/victim game when both sides are equally to blame. I’ve seen both very pathetic men and women in the community. I’ve also seen a lot of good people. Also, the focus is too much on self instead of community and raising our children to have a strong sense of values, family, and character. All these men she speaks about had a biological mother and father…whether they did their job as parents is another story. These men just don’t all of the sudden become unmarriageable, they were raised with many of values that carried into manhood…same goes with unmarriageable women.
Thank you for being brutally honest. The hard truth beats a pretty little lie any day of the week. I have been married over 25 years. We raised two wonderful young men together. I remind my husband that he is among the few good black men. It’s time that black women open their options to other men. Black men have issues no matter where we find them around the world. It’s time they go get help.
Thank you Rebecca I almost 😢cried because finally someone who has been through it acknowledged what we as single God fearing, loyal, caring good black woman who have not only tried time and time again to establish relationships with black men are experiencing. I relate to all you pointed out in this video, being married, being a single mother, carrying the household financially, spiritually having to lead in my home, desiring to operate in my feminine energy but being forced to be the protector, provider and covering of my household and children. I’m at a place now where I just want to experience God’s love expressed in a God centered marriage where the man is an extension of God’s love towards me. Someone that desires to care for me and I can care for…it no longer can be a color, culture “thing” as much as I love my black brothers they just don’t seem to see me.
Sis I feel the same way you do! I too cried when I heard this video. I said finally Mrs. Pope took the words from what I have been feeling as a Godly woman who desires to be married to a God fearing husband. I will continue to trust God for you and for every woman on the line here and for myself! In the mighty name of Jesus!
So true! Nothing but facts stated in this video. This is why hypergamy is becoming a huge thing with black women….women all over are starting to wake up and realize that most of these men have nothing to offer but heartache and stress
@@Raray200..because statistically only 20-25% of ALL WOMEN in America enjoy the benefit of being stay at home wives. What Olivia is promoting is STATISTICALLY incorrect.
@@TheWholeWorld1 I understood that a stay at home wife is an incredibly hard job that is valued at 150k per year with no days off or vacations. Many women do feel valued. According to the current 2023 study. But here is the thing women were not given options to work or have several freedoms, that we have today. The world is changing and Men are too. The main issue is respect and communication. Both parties have to communicate and value what they currently bring the relationship. But we are afraid of being hurt and rejected. Men try to protect themselves using alpha male strategies and women try as well using Hypergamy. Both are toxic. Once we let go of the past, and focus on what works now. We will have more healed and healthy relationships.
AUNTIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! I want to reach across this screen and give you the biggest hug right now!! I feel like this is the conversation no one is talkin about!!
This is a great message! I wholeheartedly believe Black women should date out. Now we gotta be real about one thing though, our weight MUST be under control first. Fit, feminine, pretty Black women can date whomever we please.
Let's be honest weight is not the main issue. However health and weight should be important to Women for themselves. Men are men and don't mind some weight. The married women I know of others races are not size 2 not even size 8 so that's a myth.
@@imo.124 Exactly. Its way more to it than that. Just observe couples when you are out. You see various couples of all different heights and weight proportions. If all you had to be was fit and feminine then how do you explain all those who fit that definition who are still single and have been for quite some time? I still think this is beating a dead horse. If you continue to complain about what you don't have or see you will never have it. Thinking your pool is small will result in very little people to choose from.
Paw paw didn't treat those fit and feminine ladies of yester year well either. That's why Big Mama and Big Auntie said get an education. Big Mama didn't want the girls stuck like her.
My mom told me in 2011 that's she no longer cares about the skin color of the man I marry as long as he loves the Lord first. I've spent this time healing and pouring into other women and I'm no longer holding out for one type of man.
I really appreciate this conversation. You are telling the truth. Most Black women are in their masculine. Where are the emotionally intelligent men. Thank you, Thank you and Thank you. I deserve love ❤❤❤❤
Thank you Auntie for saying what needed to be said and saying it in a way that didn't denigrate or disrespect black men but encouraged and provoked black single women who desire marriage to keep their options open for healthy normal love that is joyful and fulfilling❤
I'm a Black man married to a beautiful Black woman. What brought us together and keeps us together was that we both sought therapy before meeting each other and while we're married. It took us BOTH to heal. This is what's missing predominately in the Black community. All of these videos of Alpha Male this, Passport brothers that is nothing more than hurt Black men who've (possibly) placed all of their hurt on Black women from past experiences with Black women and their mothers. We all can see this and know it's true, but especially if that Black man hasn't learned to heal from past traumas brought on by environment and self inflicted. All of these videos of Black men ain't this, Black men never do this, etc, is nothing more than hurt Black women who've (possibly) placed all of their hurt on Black men from past experiences with Black men and their fathers (present and/or absent). We can all see this and know it's true, but especially if that Black woman hasn't learned to heal from past traumas brought on by environment and self inflicted. The common denominator is that our parents, grandparents, great grandparents and great-great grandparents have passed down some traumas from our ancestors that were enslaved. We've seen these traumas play out in our families and communities and some of us still hold them in knowingly and unknowingly. We're just now pushing out therapy for healing within our community. It's more Millennials and Gen Z in therapy than has ever been within the Black Baby Boomers, Generation X and early Millennial generations because it was said unto us "Those white people just trying to get into our business.", "You don't need to see no shrink.", "I can't afford no therapy." etc, etc. This means that a LOT of traumas were visited upon Black boys and girls that is still rampant within our communities from not healing; thus breaking the cycles of what could be wholesome Black relationships and repeating the cycle of blame between both Black men and women. What can truly help Black relationships.....take your daughters and sons to therapy, take yourselves to therapy; exercises your hangups and traumas, speak to the little boys and little girls inside of you that weren't loved adequately by your mothers, fathers and other family members, forgive yourselves for horrible past relationships, understand that you won't always get closure from past relationships, know what abandonment issues are so you can talk them and see your own cycles within them; talk so frequently in therapy that you heal and you can then see how other folks aren't healed making it better on you so that you can see who's healed and start healed relationships. Having said all of that, I have a Black daughter. I want nothing but the best for her. If she brought home a man that loved her that wasn't Black, as long as that man loved her as much as she loves herself, I wouldn't mind. Sistahs, if ya'll are loved beyond measure from non-Black men, I'm for you and for that. I do think that we'll all heal eventually and Black relationships will see themselves become wholesome again.
Ladies, I have been married to my husband for 21 years and I think sometimes women overlook the strong, educated, laid back black men. Women, oftentimes, pay attention to the wrong type of man. Make sure you pay attention to the men that treat their grandparents well or who are not interested in partying all the time…those are the ones you want that make wonderful husbands.
Rebecca, you're speaking TRUTH to the 10th power.... I agree... ALOT of our black brothers are walking around broken, unhealed and so damaged. I invested/investing in myself to become the best me and I get so frustrated when I meet some of these grown men and after a few conversations I hear their brokenness and the sad part they are so opposed to healing. I'm Jamaican and I used to say I'd rather stick to my own kind, but chile that's out the window, as I grow, evolve and love the new me, I desire a man who cares as much as I do on healing and self development. I am severely allergic to men who refuse to get healing and become their best selves. I am so broken hearted for them at times and also annoyed with their blindness of needing help. I'll continue to pray that God stirrup their souls to desire healing and go get it... and stay committed until they see change. So true.... most women are working on themselves and the men oh boy let's just say....think nothing is wrong with them.
@@tiaraterry1344 yeah it's disappointing. They even have created new platforms encouraging black men to get therapy. However, some still refuse to do the work
She is LYING. The majority of Black men in the USA are NOT "BROKEN" , "DAMAGED" AND "UNHEALED". The majority of black men are EMPLOYED--BLACK MEN OUT-EARN BLACK WOMEN--According to BLACK DEMOGRPAHICS! The MAJORITY OF BLACK MEN are SINGLE AND CHILDLESS! But ...go on believing in this lying "Christian woman's narratives NOT BASED ON ANY STATISTICAL DATA and FACTS!
You really think more black women are healed than black men ? 😂 the lies you women tell yourselves. And most non black men didn’t go through what black men go through .
This was so good!!! I needed all of this!!! I've been saying these things for years and I'm going to open myself up to other ethnicities. I deserve to be loved and cared for, it doesn't matter what his color. I want who God has for me.
If a product isn't selling, the issue is either the product or the sales person. The problem is never the buyer. To sell a product, you must study the buyer and their needs. With black women, if they are single, they never look at the mirror to find out why they are not selling. Instead, they blame the men who are not buying.
I was married to a good man for 20 plus years, who was a provider, protector and an exceptional father. He passed away and I was by myself for 5 years before I started dating again. Dating has been a nightmare her in Atlanta! Lady Pope, thank you so much for this message.❤
RLP 2017: Black Women's dating standards are DELUSIONAL. I quit coaching Black Women. RLP 2020 - 2021: I never said Black Women's dating Standards are DELUSIONAL. RLP 2023: I'm back coaching Black Women. There's not enough Black Men, Black Women should Divest. RLP 2024: Whatever Grift keeps the money rolling in is what I'll say.
I have been married interracially for over 30 years and let me tell you love is def love. Sometimes we get programmed as black women to assume our men are our birthright. Well both man and woman need the same programming otherwise go with a new program.
This video spoke to my heart and had me in tears because Auntie Rebecca was speaking to my frustration and disappointment in dating black men . I always tried to give them the benefit of the doubt as a good black woman but now I am going to pray and ask God to help me see the ordained man he has for me and send me that man outside of my race. This video gave me hope and a new perspective in trusting God with my love life!
I haven't finished the video...but did she say abandon your race and look for non bm?? I don't think she said that ma. She was just encouraging bw to be open to other races of you want to get married. Not F All bm. Mine you, her husband is a bm...a good bm. Gotta get it together ma. Cmon now. SMH
@jayc5756 There's not enough "good" Bm for every BW who wants one...so...there's no choice but to date out. Take your grievance up with the Tyrones who spent generations NOT raising their sons into manhood.
@@catmouse2882 That's like me saying there's not enough good bw for us bm, so I should date out. Like Cmon now. You Only Need 1 ma. But I you wanna date out, that's up to you ma. And why do I care about the Tyronne's. If yall gonna keep giving them play all the time, they have NO INCENTIVE To Change ma. It is what it is.
I have literally been preaching this exact message for God knows how long. It needed to be said from THIS source specifically. Praise God 🙏🏾. I know this was a sacrifice, so thank you so very much for this, Rebecca. God bless you truly. 🙏🏾
Ms. Rebecca you have PREACHEDDDD I am so sick of it!!! Each of your points are verified and accurate. So many beautiful, handsome black guys on my job... none of them want women if they do, theyre already in relationships or flat out hidden. Its so rough out here for us single girls, it hurts sometimes.
This was excellent! 👌🏽I’m a happily, single, black, female OG. I just happened to stumble up on this wonderful video and I’m glad that I took the time to watch it. Thanks! I’m sharing it!
I understand where you are coming from Rebecca. This isn't a put down of Black Men. There are some amazing Black men out there...however as a whole Black women should explore outside their race, if they desire marriage or lasting commitments in a partner. You have to change your mindset if you want different results or outcomes. I agree with you! Thanks for the topic.
I agree RLP! As a single black woman I have definitely opened up my options and have had far more success dating out in terms of quality. It’s unfortunate, but I’d encourage any woman who is interested in marriage to be open to all races of men.
What spaces are you in to be approached by other races of men? I’m open, but don’t know where to start. I’ve never been approached by another race in the grocery store- let’s say.
@@Bre_Inspired_ I met my current bf who happens to be white at a food & wine festival in my city. Social events & establishments that encourage mingling is the best way to go! Most people want to be in and out of grocery stores quickly. Go places where people are lingering and talking to others. Ex. Rooftop lounges, networking happy-hours, local events that interest you that attract at least 50% men.
So what rebecca is saying that black men were not raised to be husbands but black women who are from the same community were raised to be wives. Can someone please explain this to me?
I absolutely understand what you say. I am a Black woman who pursued a career first to secure my future. Not realizing that I was sacrificing my "prime." Now, I am engaged (getting married next April) to a white man. Like you, I don't have the financial pressure any longer. I am living my dream. For all the single Black ladies, get yourself permission to at least try to date out of your race. Just try it.
5-6 Years ago Aunt Rebecca quit being a match maker for Black women because she said black women are too difficult to please . She says that black women were passing up all the good black men😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I will be 48 in August, and have never been married. I am sorry to say, but I am over it. Marriage is no longer on mind. I am just trying to reach my other goals before I die... I have no time for drama, games, or time to train an adult man. If a man of God comes in my life, or not, I am good☺️
Well said ❤ almost brought me to tears. You’re absolutely right, it is time for us to be seen for how wonderful we are in our divine feminine and not just the help or support. ❤❤❤ nuff love to you
The video I never knew I needed. Thank you. I am going to start praying for God to open up my mind and heart to all races and let love in. 🙏🏽 I still love black men but will now allow myself to be open to loving other men as well.
🙌🏾👏🏽💎 It takes courage to share the truth with love. This is love for your sisters and I for one truly appreciate your heartfelt support! I’ve been married twice , both black men. One who tried to beat me into submission and the other who left me with 2 children under the age of 2. Through God’s Grace ,therapy and self discovery I realized that I deserve someone who loves me and treats me like a queen…the nationality just makes it interesting 👑
This message has been a LONG TIME COMING. Yes, we as black women need to prioritize our health and long term happiness over how tall a man is, or how much money he makes or how good looking he is or his race or ethnicity. We need to prioritize CHARACTER, MASCULINE ENERGY, and relationship with God! We have been so focused on for so long all the things that don’t really matter. Sold a bill of goods that doesn’t even take our true happiness into account. I encourage all black women to put yourself WAY out there and use a totally different measuring stick to determine the best man for you. Just TRY IT. What can it hurt? AND it may actually help.😉💯🙏🏽❤️
I'm so glad I'm married to my black wife.. I'm a corny dude who spent the better part of my life being rejected by black women. With that said. I been passed over numerous times by black women who ended up choosing men who ran out on them. We all got choices. Peace is a choice. 🤷🏿♂️
Black women's expectations are the same as other women. The problem is that our community is so dysfunctional and most of our men are so broken that normal expectations ( loyalty, a job, car, place to live- house or apartment) "appear" to be unrealistic.
She was saying that the black women she encountered had desires to marry the same type of men. Basically 6ft, 6pack and 6figures (666) and then fine like a movie star. When a lot of good men do not meet that criteria, and those that do, have too many options and don't want the women that want them.
Because years ago a Pod she said that women had unrealistic expectations...she gave up coaching them...she is talking TH-cam manosphere talking points we have the receipt
@chavelahutchinson2657 Real journalist with REAL statistical data. 1. The average income of Black women is 35k to 40k a year. 2. Only about 10 percent of all Black women in the USA make 6 figures. 3. Black men out earn Black women in income from 41k up to 50k on average. 4. The majority of men over 6 feet tall in the USA are around 14% to 20% 5. The majority of Black men are NOT "dysfunctional ", "unemployed " or "Broken ". You need to do ACTUAL RESEARCH instead of spitting out false stereotypical untrue narratives about Black men.
@myronscott8611 both things can be true. In that world (black women who can afford a dating service in ATL), I'm sure there were a lot of shallow expectations. There are still a lot of woman who will look over a good man because he isn't the right height. But now she is teaching a dating class, more likely with more genuine women, who likely aren't the same population she was serving before. Now her message is go where you can be loved appropriately, no matter the race.
We are not raising our girls to be a good, Godly humans,wives and mothers NOR our boys to be good, Godly humans, husbands and fathers. The FAMILY is what should always come first.
My dad used to demand that I marry a black man. He passed away 10 years ago. I’m married to an amazing Hispanic man. We’re similar in so many ways, and our cultures blend well. Not that it matters. Love is love!
Thank you for always utilizing your platform to spread awareness by speaking on ALL the harsh truths that most keep to themselves because it’s simply easier. Since sooo many people today can’t handle the truth because they’re usually not living in accordance with their own😮
I'm 62/man and have been thru it all as well. She's not wrong here, she's just focused on A side of a multi sided issue. The adoption by black women of western feminism was and is a major factor in this schism as well... Women (write large) THINK they get to define what & who is attractive FOR men. 🤷🏽♂️ Too many women think they're masculine traits & accomplishments make them higher value to men!? 👀 Utter craziness.
If this reaches just one woman who decides to pray, open up her options for love, and ends up married, I’ve done my job. ❤
Thank for this video.
I totally agree with you.
Unfortunately, churches, in the home or schools are not teaching or emphasizing blacks to have a family, be responsible and marry.
Slavery is still taking place in the black man’s mind.
Wake up brothers.
Black women, Indian men are great! Pay Attention to them black women.
Thanks for this video. I've been single/divorced for years now. I'm definitely open to marrying a non-black man.
Been wanting marriage, and said another prayer while watching . Advice taken ✅
🙏🏾
Black women deserve to be cared for, protected, loved, and provided for too ❤️
Amen
Then yall needa loose the attitudes 🤷♂️🤷♀️
Love this!!
yes black women do deserved to be cared for and protected, and loved and provided for but a man don,t have to do this if a women is not his wife or mom or sister.
Thank you for that! 💕
I’m not gonna lie, when I see my sisters who are married to other men, they are so happy, loved and at peace. Taken care of and in their femininity.
Yes. Until the good ole trade-in time comes up. Unreal.
Factz
This is dishonest. Theres a whole study about the way black people act when they are around non blacks and dishonesty is a common trait
@@RonKraftwerk happens with a blk man too 🤷🏽♀️. Might as well get treated like a Queen and taken care of
You're lying
The best way to be valued is not having a hood dudes kids, not spending your 20s being sexually loose, preferring productive men over dudes who are exciting. This alone would change black womens lives
Absolutely, care more about yourself. Where is help from family members who can help with young men whose Father is not in the HOME
Agreed.
20s are still developmental years, especially mentally. So there are many mistakes that are made then for men and women to learn.
*Nope. Valuing Black woman is a BASELINE. Anything less gets absolutely NO LOVE.*
Whaaaat?? Misogyny!!! That's how they view this very practical advise
@@corrineperry5523They don’t seem to care about you or your struggles with your kids. At least my family didn’t. I even tried to get help from the church I was attending. No real help. That’s what I went through. I did the best I could raising my son alone. I tried so hard to be both mother and father. I couldn’t be both effectively. Didn’t work. He’s dead now. The culture and and streets took him. He seemed to want that kinda life more.
I met a 49 year old navy veteran black man who has been divorced for 6 years who told me that he wants to have s3x with multiple women at this point in his life. I kindly dismissed myself from his life. (I appreciate his honesty) Sometimes you just have to choose you.
I was tried like this too. But God!
@smartkookie and @Geneka737...Smart move, ladies! There are some BW who opt to stay involved with such men, despite being forewarned. I applaud you both on using your God-given sense and exiting stage left...far away from men who have no control over their libidos. I view men like the ones both of you encountered as weaklings. You both deserve better men than these! 💯
@@WiseLady7 Thanks dear. It took me a while to get here. I would settle just because I thought I wasn't being reasonable. Now I know better.
wow
Must be lonely being delusional
Ladies if you want to be a wife , move as a wife , don't be a girl friend because they are play things for players .
If you want a white man for a husband keep in mind we move slower in our approach . We like the dance of the back and forth interaction because charm and respect is our cultural core .
FYI , All men fetishize women in every culture ! We are made 80% visual and made by God in His image , We hunt by sight !
White men have traveled the world and find Beauty in everything and every woman from every Contenant but if a man gives you the creeps it's probably spiritual so just keep your guard up .
@Rebecca Lynn Pope , You look lovely and I can see Carry's love and Covering as a good Husband at work in your life 100% .
Absolutely, Corey 🎉
My wife was smarter, richer and better than me but I didn't know how much till 20 years later of being happily married.
She moved like a wife and still does.
@@Exodus26.13Pi Tell me what are a few examples of moving like a wife sincerely ?
@@vfree4579You need to get that info from a WIFE
For those concerned about fetishization from other communities: BM fetishize us too, which is why there are more baby mamas than wives in our community.
Properly vet the men first, but simply go where you are loved and appreciated!
That part.
You b words chose to be baby mommas
I date out but yeah it sometimes gets a little weird and I'm not the type to ignore subtle racist renarks and jokes.
Great advice!
So black men are solely to blame for baby mamas?! Accountability is like cryptonite.
I grew up wanting a black family but now im at a point and understanding to put character over color
You can adopt a Black child
@@Heyu7her3 I've thought about that as well but motherhood isn't on my mind right now
As a black woman, you should never have been factoring in race. We don't want people judging us for our race, we shouldn't do that to people either.
@@MsLotusBlooms I didn't judge anyone else because of their race, I literally meant I envision my family to be of the same race as me.
@eyanasglow8163 I hope your vision comes a reality.
I am 52 years old and today is my 17th wedding anniversary. My husband is white and we met at work 18 years ago while working at a bank up North. We have a 10-year-old son and he is the light of our lives. I have told many of my single black, female friends to look outside of their race for a partner but they usually don’t want to do that. They are waiting for something that may never happen. I tell them that love is love, no matter what color you are. You can wait around and be alone or you can open up your eyes and your heart and find true love. I am at peace living my soft life down here in Florida. I pray that my sisters find the same peace, love and happiness as I have. Life goes by so fast, live it to the fullest.
I’m here
I’m here
Let me help you. You are not the only woman in America with a happy marriage and a good husband. More importantly, there is nothing magical about your husband being white that has anything to do with him being a good husband. He is a good husband because he is a good man to you and your child. My parents were married for 60 years both black. All 3 of my sisters have been married for 20 years plus and they got married in their 20s not there mid-thirties like yourself. They are married to black men. So there is nothing magical about your white husband I'm sorry to tell you madam. A good husband is a good husband and race has nothing to do with it
Hopefully you will find the same good man that msshay has. I wish that for you since you're hoping to find the men your sisters are with. I bid you lots of luck and fortune sweety with your chase, I really do. lol Remember he's a good man. 😏😜😘 @@alwaysreliable3
@alwaysreliable3 : Youvare absolutely 100% correct. She's acting like because she's with a white man in Florida, she's hit the jackpot. They don't even want black people in Florida.
This was a hard pill to swallow for me, but you tell no lies. I’ve done so much healing as to where I’m in a very good place. But I can’t tell you the number of black men I’ve run into that are hurting and so unhealed, won’t get healed and don’t think they have a problem. My desire is marriage so I’m now ready to open my options because it’s been a real struggle with black men. I will always love our people, but their disdain towards us is really showing, so my loyalty is now to myself!
I can really relate to this‼️
Just about everything she said was a lie. The data was false. As we're the assumptions. And she manipulating yall too. Non black men arent interested in yall in mass. And if they are. Enjoy. But they aren't.
Well said!! This resonates with me too. I really believe that alot of black women are at that point too
“Loyalty to myself” is a word.
She literally lied the whole video
I will never understand why BW are so stuck on something that isn't serving them. Divest and go where you are appreciated it's just that simple.
Also black women are supposed to be the most educated group, so why are they acting so slow 🤔
They VOTE THE SAME WAY
I think the problem lies in your diction used in the comment. You and many BW place yourself on pedestals, talking about serving you......just wow. Some women deserve everything, others do not, and majority don't. That's another issue, so many chicks think they deserve something coming with baggage just because they have a wet hole.
You are so on point with this. It's rather unfortunate
There is nothing wrong with proffering your own race but it doesn’t work out in black American woman’s favour
I’m 42. I’ve been married for 14 years and together 21 years. When I got tired of being sick and tired, I prayed. The most unselfish prayer entered my heart. I said “God, regardless of his race, Creed, or color…I just want MY husband”. At a young age something clicked. I handle some bills in my house, but by God’s grace and mercy, my husband carries the big load. He always tell me, if he ain’t stressed, then I don’t need to stress. We gotta beyond ourselves and these ridiculous time limits and standards.
Rebecca’s right. Every Black man I dated was college educated and childfree, but they all had emotional stuff it wasn’t my responsibility to wade through. My current partner has the above and more - he’s done his emotional work, and he’s truly prepared to step into the next phase of life. Many men don’t work on accessing or processing emotions; when you find one that does, pay attention.
So you think other non bm won't have similar issues?? Cmon ma, the grass isn't always greener on the other side. IJS
@Jay C I think it's all the same for the most part. Other males might be willing to marry, but that doesn't mean they treat their wives correctly. Too many other women have the same complaints as single bw. I truly believe too many males are emotionally unavailable and unlikable. Because you guys have been bred to compete and survive. So obviously it will hit the so called black race the hardest because that's the program.
The emotional work is so more bs western women have come up with
The old women are more emotionally intelligent lie.....
First of all that’s pure nonsense if you think other races of men don’t have emotional issues. But keep thinking that! Every race has emotional issues just different based on certain historical aspects. Now black women and emotional issues boy that’s another story. Many BW have not sought professional counseling due to pride and stubbornness. Yes that’s right. They think even in their dysfunction they are still queens and divas but many are horribly broken! And not from good black men! But from the dogs they have chosen to lay down with for some quick fun!
Divorce is never the way out, My wife and I have been having issues before I sort out help from a spiritual adviser,i wasnt going to let my marriage of 18years crash
@EmilioYepez7 well not the orthodox way but i was referred by a friend to a spiritual adviser and healer
@EmilioYepez7 her name is *Victoria Lee Hess* ,and she is a great spiritual adviser as well as caster
you can look her name up online and you will find all you need.
Terrible way to go. Go to God not a hex woman. You may curse yourself and your lineage.
I’ve never had a type when it came to race. I struggled with having my type being a good man. My past relationships I had to experience because they’re were life lessons I needed to learn. These experiences have taught me what to look for and how boundaries are important. Right now I’m getting to know a man that’s not black and also older than me. I have to admit its been a great experience . He’s Respectful, understanding and a complete gentleman. He opens up to me when it comes to life and experiences. He says I understand him and how he just ends up telling me everything. What I take from this is Good men need Safety and nurturing femininity is significant.
Props. Hope you get to learn what his Plan is . . .
Older men make better lovers to much younger women
SIMPLE/ EASY: stop chasing Tyrone/Pookie/Rae Rae and stop belittling good black men. You seem to only notice them when they marry other races. And all you do then is shame them.
PS: if you date outside the race, will you then Chase chad? If so, good luck 🍀✌️
I think you are 100% correct, that real love does not come in a particular color. I want to love, be loved, taken care of, honored, respected, protected,provided for, all of that. I've NEVER had any of that. Thank You for simply telling the truth.
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
If you really want marriage, you cannot wait on black men. Trust me.
That is really any men to be honest.
Facts!!
@@allthingsdelightful8565not really. Men of other cultures are raised to be husband and fathers blacks are not.
@@MissAmeriNegro I meant in general. We have to be comfortable walking away sooner if we have expressed your needs and they are not being met. Sometimes women stay too long in relationships that are not serving them.
@@MissAmeriNegromarriages are down in all races but continue lying to cope
All these black men in the comments are having a problem with what I said in this video without even listening to it. If so, they would realize that I gave honor to all of the wonderful and strong black men in our community. Just like my previous videos where I show love to our strong black men who are great husbands, fathers, and leaders. There's just not enough marriage-minded, spiritual, and emotionally healed black men to match the women who desire marriage and are doing the real work to be healed. This video is for that demographic of women. These women are my audience, my tribe. That's who I'm assigned to and really the only women I make content for. Period. I ignore comments from anyone that God didn't assign me to. Blessings and Abundance everyone. ❤
Rebecca, where are the stats you are talking about? We all are waiting for the stats? TH-camr Medium Man made a response video, with an excellent breakdown of actual stats. He takes your arguments, claims and points and dissected them step-by-step. 😅
You are setting up these BW to become easy targets for predators. This is on you, this is on your hands whenever something happens.
As of now BW have 1.5 million babies out of wedlock by non-BM! and that is per CDC!
"Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015".
(Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018)
These out of wedlock children by non-BM are considered Black according to the census bureau. Yet it’s BM who they claim for the absentee.
“The percentages were similar for non-Hispanic black (46.6%).”
(Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, 2018)
"Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015".
(Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018)
“More than half of Black business owners are men The gender divide among all U.S. business owners extends to Black or African American business owners, though by a smaller margin. Among all U.S. firms whose ownership is classifiable by gender, 63% were majority-owned by men in 2020, while 22% were owned by women and 15% had equal male-female ownership that year. By comparison, 55% of majority Black- or African American-owned businesses in 2020 had male owners, while 37% were owned by women and 8% had equal male-female ownership.” (Source: PEW, A look at Black-owned businesses in the U.S., FEBRUARY 21, 2023)
National Center of Education Statistics in 2019. The gap is greater still at higher education levels: only half as many Black men have a Master’s degree (4%) as Black women (9%), white men (8%) and white women (13%): ”
(Richard V. Reeves, Sarah Nzau, and Ember Smith, Brookings Institute, The challenges facing Black men - and the case for action (2020), Black women are earning more college degrees, but that alone won’t close race gaps (2017)
So the margin of error is around 5% between academic educated Black men and Black women.
We have to take into consideration that Black men come from mass incarceration in the 90s. And close to 50% of Black men is exonerated. Whereas Black women was given Title IX and Title IV. If one cannot understand these dynamics, one is in a sad situation.
Black men had to come from far to catchup, after things like mass incarceration happened. In 2023 we can say the incarceration of Black men has dropped with 34%.
"The nation’s imprisonment rate is at its lowest level in more than two decades. The greatest decline has come among black Americans, whose imprisonment rate has decreased 34% since 2006."
(Source: PEW research center, may 6 2020, Black imprisonment rate in the U.S. has fallen by a third since 2006).
In all actually the amount of Black people within the total population in prison is around 5%.
Anyway, look for the Medium Man channel, so he can school you a bit more.
Rebecca, where are the stats you are talking about? We all are waiting for the stats? TH-camr Medium Man made a response video, with an excellent breakdown of actual stats. He takes your arguments, claims and points and dissected them step-by-step. 😅
You are setting up these BW to become easy targets for predators. This is on you, this is on your hands whenever something happens.
As of now BW have 1.5 million babies out of wedlock by non-BM! and that is per CDC!
"Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015".
(Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018)
These out of wedlock children by non-BM are considered Black according to the census bureau. Yet it’s BM who they claim for the absentee.
“The percentages were similar for non-Hispanic black (46.6%).”
(Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, 2018)
"Fertility of Men and Women Aged 15-44 in the United States: National Survey of Family Growth, 2011-2015".
(Gladys Martinez et al., CDC, Number 113: July 11, 2018)
“More than half of Black business owners are men The gender divide among all U.S. business owners extends to Black or African American business owners, though by a smaller margin. Among all U.S. firms whose ownership is classifiable by gender, 63% were majority-owned by men in 2020, while 22% were owned by women and 15% had equal male-female ownership that year. By comparison, 55% of majority Black- or African American-owned businesses in 2020 had male owners, while 37% were owned by women and 8% had equal male-female ownership.” (Source: PEW, A look at Black-owned businesses in the U.S., FEBRUARY 21, 2023)
National Center of Education Statistics in 2019. The gap is greater still at higher education levels: only half as many Black men have a Master’s degree (4%) as Black women (9%), white men (8%) and white women (13%): ”
(Richard V. Reeves, Sarah Nzau, and Ember Smith, Brookings Institute, The challenges facing Black men - and the case for action (2020), Black women are earning more college degrees, but that alone won’t close race gaps (2017)
So the margin of error is around 5% between academic educated Black men and Black women.
We have to take into consideration that Black men come from mass incarceration in the 90s. And close to 50% of Black men is exonerated. Whereas Black women was given Title IX and Title IV. If one cannot understand these dynamics, one is in a sad situation.
Black men had to come from far to catchup, after things like mass incarceration happened. In 2023 we can say the incarceration of Black men has dropped with 34%.
"The nation’s imprisonment rate is at its lowest level in more than two decades. The greatest decline has come among black Americans, whose imprisonment rate has decreased 34% since 2006."
(Source: PEW research center, may 6 2020, Black imprisonment rate in the U.S. has fallen by a third since 2006).
In all actually the amount of Black people within the total population in prison is around 5%.
Anyway, look for the Medium Man channel, so he can school you a bit more.
No problem at all. But we aren't the only ones seeing this video other men from other races see this stuff too, yall forget that your posting to for anyone to see. What it sounds like is that your telling black women to give up on their preference and go for someone else outside the community. I'm cool with that, I did it too but what you don't see it the way your framing it. Men see this and see themselves in the eyes of a black woman as second choice. Basically "she's only with me because she can't get a black man" no man worth anything is going to be settled for especially if he's got his own community he can be with. Yall basically think so highly of yourselves that you think you'd be doing a white,asian,latino man a favor by dating him? Baby boo have you looked at the data? Because you'd be the lucky one but hey yall do what yall want cause cats out of the bag now and we ain't ever going back to America. ✌️
@@danielisaac7586ou are spot on. Im latino and I interpreted the video like you do. I'll take it a step further, it seemed to me this video's message is: black men are not enough, it is their fault, their struggles and trauma, so seek men outside the race.
@@bplayerr1 yeah that's what these types of women put out and think other men who got plenty of women of their own to choose from are going to pick a older black woman with attitude. Nope. When you wanna be accepted in a different culture you gotta change not the othrt way around but black woman won't do that for anyone and basically think they are made of gold. Hey if they are good for them but alot of them are ending up alone so it is what it is data doesnt lie and while yes black men are second from last as far as being seen as attractive (I believe it goes white first hispanic second and arab third) we can still find women since we don't mind dating down no man does actually. But these women with wigs on their heads think the are gonna date out and a rich white guy is gonna pick them? Have they seen how rich white women look? They're delusional and their own hypergamy will take them out of the gene pool. So I guess it's a problem that will eventually solve itself 👍
I have to admit you are so right. We deserve and are entitled to peace and happiness. There is a crisis!
Thank you so much.
80% of Black women are overweight so it doesn't matter anymore. We deserve healthy wombs! Yes or no?
There is also a white crisis, marriage is under 50% in
WHITE AMERICA, and divorce is OVER 50%
Times have really changed Olivia. I used to watch you 6 years ago when I was single. I used your advise back then and got married. I am divorced now but have learned so much. This is a completely different conversation 6 years later. Social media has destroyed black men and women.
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES !!!***
The black culture has been on the course of destruction since the mid eighties. Social media has excelarate in the disfunction and the destruction of our community.
Why'd you all divorce? Was it communication. What could have been done differently to save it
Seventy percent of women the divorce That's not going to change all you want. Is the image of a wedding as soon as it is done? You don't want to put in. Any? Of the. Work? To have. A good? Relationship and believe that it. Must? Be perfect. This is why men are not going to waste their time getting married to you. You can do this with another race because you don't treat them the same as you treat. Black man
What was the reason for your divorce? And who filed for the divorce?
Open your options Black Women!! Amen.
Amen
To what? 😆
To who? Hate to tell u something. Other men not looking to marriage either
Wishful thinking at best. FYI, men control marriage and The white boys did not get that memo.
@@ksager123Exactly. I’m hearing AA women say they’re moving to Africa, I’m like maaaaan they have no idea what they’re in for.
When a man takes good care of you it brings PEACE and when I say care I mean emotionally physically mentally and financially
I'm team BLACK FOREVER AS WE WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER FROM THE ALMIGHTY. TO EACH HIS OWN..
I don’t see any other race of ppl encouraging interracial dating, but black ppl. Black men/women over look good potential mates all the time due to superficial things. Secondly, the grass ain’t greener other races are just as jacked up. We have to tend to our own garden first. Therapy, reprogramming, healing, and prayer is definitely needed in our community 🙏🏿🙏🏿
I agree.
Step tho …. She not talking about race. she is talking about BW need to be cared for.
@@naturallybeautiful9109..but that’s his point. People in our community PASSING UP on potential because he don’t have “the bag”. Or she’s not “fit”. News flash.. only 18% of white men make over 100k (compared to 8% of black men). And the VAST majority of women (in general) are “overweight”. It’s called priorities.
Please understand, Studies show that black women do better when they marry white men. In fact, they only have a 3% divorce rate when they marry white men. On the other hand, black men have an 89% divorce rate when they marry white women.
Totally agree brother, we were created for each other not other races of degenerates👊🏿
I've been married for 20 years and I'm so blessed by my husband. He truly leads me toward the best things in life. I want other Black women to be able to experience that too if they want. Yes, he is white. His values, morals, and character were more important than his race.
THIS! Thank you, Lord for this word. I will not give up nor give in. I will not give up on love.
I became a single mom from a Vietnamese man, deadbeat dad has no race.
Sadly, you're correct.
A lot of these Asian cultures are not accepting of mixed race couples
👀👋🏾
Rebecca articulated this truth so well. It’s so hard for me to find non black men attractive so I’m definitely praying for an open heart. In the same vein, this hurts because I really thought I’d have a good, black husband by now. I’m 39…no prospects at all, no dates and no DMs! I believe I’m great and attractive but it doesn’t matter lol!
I know this feeling all too well 😮💨
Start paying attention to Indian men.
Janice Hilton had said this but I thought she was crazy. Not anymore.
Very attractive, family oriented and faithful.
@@theadvancedforce1017
I’m sorry. I just was telling my truth. You are right I do not need to attack.
Be blessed!
@@theadvancedforce1017
I never said nor did I hear anyone else say that other races are better than the bm.
It’s sad how we (bw and bm are blaming each other. Blame never resolve the issues.
We all need to first start with self. I believe the woman reflect the man.
God is awesome. He uses women to help the man see how he is doing. If he doesn’t like what he sees he has the power to change what’s reflected.
Don’t blame. It all started in the beginning.
Be blessed!
I
What is so desirable about black males? When you measure the character of a good human and then a man; a person of courage; a person of integrity, do black males even qualify?
Black women can attain a successful marriage by prioritizing self-love and self-care while actively seeking partners who value and respect them. It is important to set standards and boundaries for healthy relationships and to engage in open and honest communication with potential partners. Building a strong support network and seeking guidance from mentors or therapists can also provide valuable insights and guidance throughout the process. Additionally, actively participating in personal growth and self-improvement can contribute to building a strong foundation for a successful marriage. Remember, success in marriage is not solely determined by race but rather by nurturing a loving and respectful partnership based on shared values, effective communication, and mutual support.
Absolutely true!
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
I completely agree with you. I am also glad I am in a position where I collect data for a living, along with studies and being able to connect with other races of men and women I can tell you that white women, Hispanic women etc have the same issues and they will tell you that. You have to trust God in this area, and that’s not always easy.
@@KFontLab true...
**** WE ALREADY HAVE RESPECT AND LOVE BY MANY BLACKS >>> AND WE LOVE OUR WOMEN>>> AND U ARE DOING BLACK MEN A TERRIBLE SERVICE BY SELLING THIS EVIL CURSE>>> DONT TRY TO BE A MATCHMAKER ..LET THE LORD DO HIS WORK AND HE DONT NEED NO HELP>>> PLEASE STOP *****IF THEY ARE NOT MARRIED MAYBEE THEY HAVE SOMETHING TO LEARN BEFORE MARRIAGE 8**
I am a black female and i have been married for a long time. When i met my black husband i was 23 years old..and i was dating a white man. He was so good to me but then i met my husband. He was such a good attentive man for 15 years. After that honey he started switching up on me. He even told me that he ONLY did everything for me so he wouldn’t lose me. Not because he loved me and that’s what he wanted to do. Pick wisely ladies.
Ooooh, that sounds TERRIBLE! 🤯 I hope you're soon able to get out of that
How horrible, you monkey branched from a good man to another good man that put a ring on it and has been there for 23 yrs and somehow you are the victim!!
Thank you so much for this video from France ! 🇫🇷 We are facing the same issues here too…
Have "HUMILITY" wherever you go. There are IMMUTABLE UNIVERSAL LAW that don't Bend to nobody no matter how supposedly Righteousness they are. Coming from a Black man in a Wealthy loving Relationship with a Black woman.
Thank you. I’m so happy that reputable people are saying these things out loud. Because when I or other quality black women who are single say the same thing, we get met with - oh you’re just damaged, you’re not thinking positively, oh you want too much, you shouldn’t have gotten all that education and just stayed basic. It’s exhausting.
Men been saying this but black women do not listen. too masculine. choosing to let random pookies use them up like pookies personal urinals and toilet bowls, and the list goes on. BW, like most women, cannot see from a man's point of view.
Say it LOUDER for the people in the back!!!! AMEN!!! I’ve been telling my friends this for years!! Me…. I’ve been married 24 yrs to my non-black husband. 3 kids and VERY happy. Broaden your horizons sistas. The men do all the time!!
Hey, I can see why you had options but that's not going to work for most. You look relatively young on this picture and if you got married 24 years ago, I take it that you looked even younger than now. The point is Non White men aren't going to marry overweight sisters. The ones that look like yourself or Rebecca will certainly have options but trust if the options were there for most...it would be a mass exodus a long time ago...:) congrats though. I'll be at 29 years next weekend myself to a Black woman with two kids. :) The important thing is to stay in your lane. I don't mean race, I mean your Lane. Don't be out asking for something you don't qualify for.
**** STOP LISTENIN TO WITCHES>>>> PRINCESSESS DONT MARRY HEATHEN KILLERS AND SLAVEDRIVER MOTHA.F***AS
@@bernardtim1776 I'm black and did bikini competition last summer and non black men are interested in a toned fit black woman... I'm in relationship now with a young man. I got him into body building. We support each other well. Just returned from vacation in Italy.
@@wello5839 I agree...the ones that are fit and toned are clearly the prettiest in the world. The problem is most aren't fit. The stats show that and those are the ones complaining about not being able to find good men. The ones that are fit get hit on daily by men from all walks of life. You can attest to that so my point is women that look like yourself or Rebecca need to stop lying to the ones that are obese telling them to open their options...You lose options when you are 50 or 100 pounds over weight...or have kids....that's just a fact. So she was dead wrong for that part of the video.
She's got a big as ring on and truth is men are going to hit on her married with the ring on and walk right past a woman dragging kids or very huge women. Now...there are plenty of men that will have them...but not the men they are trying to get. Again, I see large white women everyday walking into the Walmart with men that adore them....they just aren't the so called upper society part of men.
@@bernardtim1776not true. You're a liar. I have seen otherwise.
A woman should never give up her independence. It is crucial that she always be able to support herself. I am a family law attorney, and I have seen so many instances of women being in horrible situations once they become dependent on a man. They have a harder time getting out of abusive situations because they cannot support themselves. And, even if they leave, they have no money and no way to make it on their own. Many times the husband will take all the money, stop making her car payment, stop paying for her phone, etc. She is essentially left high and dry. Marriage is a wonderful institution, but in this modern world a woman should never become dependent on a man financially.
Thank you, Queen, for this great video.
Ive been with 3 good woman in my life and currently in a relationship with one of them. Those were 1 black woman, 1 indian woman, and 1 mixed white and hispanic. Black women i tell you this date the MAN that is the best for you dont matter what race. Find someone who is willing to move at the same pace same goes for the men. This is best dating advice i ever got and its the only advice you'll ever need.
I agree with this message for the most part, but I also think some BW overlook good men for superficial reasons. You addressed this a few years ago. I have a good one who some would overlook immediately because he’s under 6 feet, works in a blue collar field, and misspells some words ( highly intelligent when it comes to science and math).
Props . . .
Excellent and truthful loving message! I know so many bw who exclusively wanted a bm and grew old by themselves. They are still waiting. The bm of comparable age still don't want to commit, and they are in their late fifties, sixties. well into seventies. When they consider committing its because the cucumber doesn't work or they are physically ill.
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
I work in the criminal legal field and I can honestly say that we’ve lost A LOT of our men of all ages due to being imprisoned or having been ended by another Black man. Many of the Black male attorneys are either already married or uninterested in marriage but are on the baby daddy train. It’s crazy, frustrating and disappointing 😣
Not according to these black male podcasts 😂according to them 60% of BM are in the middle class and child free 🥴
@@sallyhemings2295 Yeah....they're very detached from reality
@@sallyhemings2295 the lies they tell smh 🤦
So will you admit that a lot of them are there because of black women?
@@sallyhemings2295 60% are middle class, slow Keisha. Look up what middle class means.
Black men are hurting and wounded and bleeding all over us, but they are covering their wounds with ego and denial. Only God can start to mend their hearts.
Our job is to be a prayer warrior and push the enemy back. We have to stand on the side lines and fight this spiritual battle. We cannot let this generational battle continue to divide the black community. We are a force when we work together.
But we as black women also have be open to whoever God provides for us. Let God lead with our partnership selection.
So many mental issues with black men it’s insane
They have to fight for themselves. A lot of them don’t even go to church. Churches are filled with single BW and even married BW fighting for them spiritually. God helps those who help themselves
Amen!!
Look, degrees are icing on the cake. They signal you are capable of learning and having a decent job. But it is not even close to the priority. Men care more about your feminine qualities and skills. Period. I'm a black woman who got married recently and to a non-black man (not that it matters). I know. Feminity (inner and outer) is what will get that life commitment from a quality man.
Thank You Rebecca for this MESSAGE! 🙌🏽 WE as BLACK WOMEN Need to recognize OUR WORTH and know that we are WORTHY of a PROVIDER MAN/HUSBAND just like every other race of WOMEN!
Here’s the problem, a lot of blk women minds are F’ed up and y’all think another group of ppl want to mix with all that trauma.
This is crazy af. Go heal 1st.
The question is when do Black Women want to be married before or after having their fun and kids with the th ugs and playas?
Fist you and ms. pope need to STOP this "provider husband" nonsense. Go to the U.S. Census report JUST finished a few years ago SEVENTY TWO PERCENT OF WHITE HOUSEHOLDS, have TWO working adults. So White boy ain't providing NOTHING but his share of the bills they are paying JOINTLY. This is data, not the words of a random therapist or "matchmaker," with no sources, data or facts. MOre data for you, WHITE MEN are not even marrying THEIR OWN anymore, so what makes you think they are going to marry you? For the first time in history marriage in America with white folks is UNDER 50% (48%) - Pew Research Center. DIVORCES for the first time in history, including a dramatic increase over 50, is over 50% (National Insittue Of Health) So please STOP with the "just like every other race of women," IT IS NOT TRUE. Finally BW have the LOWEST rate of marrying out of any group in AMerica Asians 35%, Latinos 28%, BW 10%. This is a pipe dre3am and a nonworkable solution at a time where marriage within the White group is going down, and certainly the desire to marry into a group with 73% of the families single mothers. Get real
@@dasani6055exactly!
@@dasani6055that’s a problem created by feminism in America it’s across all races women need to start being women and stop acting like men
I finally came to a realization yesterday, that I'm now open to not just dating black men, it's been a long time coming for me to come to that conclusion! Thank you Aunt Rebecca ❤️❤️❤️
There's someone for everyone. All the best.
I'm just not gonna date. Men are trash in general and my body relaxed and became un-anxious as soon as I admitted to myself that this might be my reality. Tbh my huge funky, depressive mood didn't start until I began thinking that I'll be single and child-free.
I had WW tell me I was silly for being BM only. They were good friends and colleagues who looked at me like I was crazy. Flat out told me my life would be easier and sweeter with a WM. WW said this to my face.
SIMPLE/ EASY: stop chasing Tyrone/Pookie/Rae Rae and stop belittling good black men. You seem to only notice them when they marry other races. And all you do then is shame them.
PS: if you date outside the race, will you then Chase chad? If so, good luck 🍀✌️
I do believe that we as Black Women should keep an open mind. However remember there are a lot of unhealed Men. I have met Non-bLack Men with Mommy issues and many other issues. So ladies please vet ALL Men. Do not assume because he is Non-black he is "better".
Wow Rebecca, you were preaching girl! I desire marriage and have been open to dating outside my race for years now BUT I will only marry under the circumstance that I am with a man who loves and adores me and will fully provide and protect me and our future children! I WILL NOT marry or procreate under ANY OTHER CIRCUMSTANCES!
Thank you for having the courage to speak about this challenge for black women. I definitely needed to hear this!!! Your message was confirmation on my decision to begin opening my options!!!
After that public display of mamming that Iyanla did and tried to get eboni brown, to accept dating a bus driver, I now know officially that black women aren't suppose to want the best or look for it. It's ok for women of other races to have desires and go for their "dream guy" and often times, can get it.
But black women??
We should shut up and eat whatever crumbs, life throws us, and be satisfied with that. And that's no way to live.
A Black Pastor said back in the 80's said if Black Men don't self correct and match Black Women, Black Women will surpassed them and they have no way to be equally yoked. This was back in 1980!!
Loved this topic. Something that I need to consider as I'm listening to you while cutting the grass. LOL This is getting so old sis. Yes, its great exercise to do yardwork, but my mother, who is now a widow after being married 34 years, NEVER cut the grass. I'm eager and ready to be the Godly wife I know I'm destined to be and to live a life that is even more of an ease and flow than it currently is.😊
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
Did your mom work? How early was she married? Did she "date around" in her 20s? Did she have a spiritual compass? See...the indulgence of being a "modern woman" is just coming back to bite us.....there is some truth is what she says but is there ANYTHING that BW need to work on to be better mates or is it ALWAYS someone else's fault?
@rodneyhughes5299 Yes, my mother worked. She was an educator and is now retired. My mother had me at age 28 and was married 1-2 years by then. Yes, she's a woman of faith (Christian) and she and my dad were high school sweethearts (my dad was two years older), but took a slight break while they were in college and got back together, so they definitely dated others.
And yes, women AND men can both work on things individually to be better partners. I'm not saying I'm perfect by any means. I just thought that I would have met that special someone by now organically. It just seems like meeting a nice guy is a job within itself and that our parent's generation had such an easier time.
This is so frustrating to hear. As a man, I hear the cry of my sisters, and there is real pain in our community. However, this advice is only a bandaid and will not fix the problem.
In one breath 23:40 (I absolutely agree), you say men are looking for a woman that brings "love, comfort, joy, partnership, peace, compassion, understanding, and nurturing". BUT at 15:10, you say what black women are focusing on: "Education, income, and courses."
Our sisters are not focusing on the qualities that make them ATTRACTIVE to men; they focus on the qualities that make them ATTRACTED to men.
As a man, I cannot say, "I must meet a good black woman to be in my masculine." I must BE that good masculine man in order to attract her. Similarly, a woman must BE feminine to attract the kind of man she wants; otherwise, she will keep repelling men of EVERY race.
There is a reason why black women are statistically at the bottom of the desirability list when it comes to dating apps, and it has nothing to do with black men.
And to anecdotally counter the ‘gay men at the gym’ argument, I RARELY see any black women in there ever. I see Asian women and white women.
Peace and love ❤️
Come to my city here in Michigan. We get it in at the gym. But also in yoga, Pilates, spin classes…fitness classes. Try to keep in mind, the gym isn’t the only place to get fit. Would love to see more brothas in yoga- it’s great for mind health and so much more. ☺️
You said you hear the cry but then spent most of your response defending black men. That's not hearing the cry. And you can be educated and feminine.
TREMENDOUSLY WELL SAID TRUTH, im a black Man, and I definitely agree that bw dating out will not solve their problems, also bm are not the blame or issue, but I hope bw find what they're looking for, God bless em 🙏🏽!!!!!
I totally agree 100%. I just asked someone recently not to refer to me as a strong black woman. It is not a compliment to me. We need to remove that because mentally you began to think you need to li e up to it even if it drives you crazy, then you angry. No no....not me. Ans how about we are the only culture that are critiqued from the tip of our heads to the bottom of our feet. And some of us jump on the bandwagon. Not good ladies. Stop letting men and society judge your character based on hair, make up, nails.
People wanting to place blame and insist that it is the fault of BM or BW, when both genders have contributed to the downfall of black relationships.
It would be nice if we would stop being distracted with that argument and start being a part of the solution. That starts with healing and therapy, which most are not willing to do.
Best comment! I’m a guy and totally agree. Both sides be playing the blame/victim game when both sides are equally to blame. I’ve seen both very pathetic men and women in the community. I’ve also seen a lot of good people. Also, the focus is too much on self instead of community and raising our children to have a strong sense of values, family, and character. All these men she speaks about had a biological mother and father…whether they did their job as parents is another story. These men just don’t all of the sudden become unmarriageable, they were raised with many of values that carried into manhood…same goes with unmarriageable women.
Thank you for being brutally honest. The hard truth beats a pretty little lie any day of the week. I have been married over 25 years. We raised two wonderful young men together. I remind my husband that he is among the few good black men. It’s time that black women open their options to other men. Black men have issues no matter where we find them around the world. It’s time they go get help.
Thank you Rebecca I almost 😢cried because finally someone who has been through it acknowledged what we as single God fearing, loyal, caring good black woman who have not only tried time and time again to establish relationships with black men are experiencing. I relate to all you pointed out in this video, being married, being a single mother, carrying the household financially, spiritually having to lead in my home, desiring to operate in my feminine energy but being forced to be the protector, provider and covering of my household and children. I’m at a place now where I just want to experience God’s love expressed in a God centered marriage where the man is an extension of God’s love towards me. Someone that desires to care for me and I can care for…it no longer can be a color, culture “thing” as much as I love my black brothers they just don’t seem to see me.
I can relate 100%
👍 it's better for black women to just stay single for life 😘 much love 💕
@@danielisaac7586why?
Sis I feel the same way you do! I too cried when I heard this video. I said finally Mrs. Pope took the words from what I have been feeling as a Godly woman who desires to be married to a God fearing husband. I will continue to trust God for you and for every woman on the line here and for myself! In the mighty name of Jesus!
So true! Nothing but facts stated in this video. This is why hypergamy is becoming a huge thing with black women….women all over are starting to wake up and realize that most of these men have nothing to offer but heartache and stress
I disagree ,
@@tommi52why?
I agree with you
@@Raray200..because statistically only 20-25% of ALL WOMEN in America enjoy the benefit of being stay at home wives. What Olivia is promoting is STATISTICALLY incorrect.
@@TheWholeWorld1 I understood that a stay at home wife is an incredibly hard job that is valued at 150k per year with no days off or vacations. Many women do feel valued. According to the current 2023 study. But here is the thing women were not given options to work or have several freedoms, that we have today. The world is changing and Men are too. The main issue is respect and communication. Both parties have to communicate and value what they currently bring the relationship. But we are afraid of being hurt and rejected. Men try to protect themselves using alpha male strategies and women try as well using Hypergamy. Both are toxic. Once we let go of the past, and focus on what works now. We will have more healed and healthy relationships.
AUNTIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! I want to reach across this screen and give you the biggest hug right now!! I feel like this is the conversation no one is talkin about!!
This is a great message! I wholeheartedly believe Black women should date out. Now we gotta be real about one thing though, our weight MUST be under control first. Fit, feminine, pretty Black women can date whomever we please.
Yes. Other cultures except for maybe Indian from India don't mind weight.
Let's be honest weight is not the main issue. However health and weight should be important to Women for themselves. Men are men and don't mind some weight. The married women I know of others races are not size 2 not even size 8 so that's a myth.
@@imo.124 Exactly. Its way more to it than that. Just observe couples when you are out. You see various couples of all different heights and weight proportions. If all you had to be was fit and feminine then how do you explain all those who fit that definition who are still single and have been for quite some time? I still think this is beating a dead horse. If you continue to complain about what you don't have or see you will never have it. Thinking your pool is small will result in very little people to choose from.
Paw paw didn't treat those fit and feminine ladies of yester year well either. That's why Big Mama and Big Auntie said get an education. Big Mama didn't want the girls stuck like her.
Marriage is down across all races because women don't listen to men. Yall just make up what 'we' want.
My mom told me in 2011 that's she no longer cares about the skin color of the man I marry as long as he loves the Lord first. I've spent this time healing and pouring into other women and I'm no longer holding out for one type of man.
I really appreciate this conversation. You are telling the truth. Most Black women are in their masculine. Where are the emotionally intelligent men. Thank you, Thank you and Thank you. I deserve love ❤❤❤❤
Thank you Auntie for saying what needed to be said and saying it in a way that didn't denigrate or disrespect black men but encouraged and provoked black single women who desire marriage to keep their options open for healthy normal love that is joyful and fulfilling❤
I'm a Black man married to a beautiful Black woman. What brought us together and keeps us together was that we both sought therapy before meeting each other and while we're married. It took us BOTH to heal. This is what's missing predominately in the Black community.
All of these videos of Alpha Male this, Passport brothers that is nothing more than hurt Black men who've (possibly) placed all of their hurt on Black women from past experiences with Black women and their mothers. We all can see this and know it's true, but especially if that Black man hasn't learned to heal from past traumas brought on by environment and self inflicted.
All of these videos of Black men ain't this, Black men never do this, etc, is nothing more than hurt Black women who've (possibly) placed all of their hurt on Black men from past experiences with Black men and their fathers (present and/or absent). We can all see this and know it's true, but especially if that Black woman hasn't learned to heal from past traumas brought on by environment and self inflicted.
The common denominator is that our parents, grandparents, great grandparents and great-great grandparents have passed down some traumas from our ancestors that were enslaved. We've seen these traumas play out in our families and communities and some of us still hold them in knowingly and unknowingly. We're just now pushing out therapy for healing within our community. It's more Millennials and Gen Z in therapy than has ever been within the Black Baby Boomers, Generation X and early Millennial generations because it was said unto us "Those white people just trying to get into our business.", "You don't need to see no shrink.", "I can't afford no therapy." etc, etc. This means that a LOT of traumas were visited upon Black boys and girls that is still rampant within our communities from not healing; thus breaking the cycles of what could be wholesome Black relationships and repeating the cycle of blame between both Black men and women.
What can truly help Black relationships.....take your daughters and sons to therapy, take yourselves to therapy; exercises your hangups and traumas, speak to the little boys and little girls inside of you that weren't loved adequately by your mothers, fathers and other family members, forgive yourselves for horrible past relationships, understand that you won't always get closure from past relationships, know what abandonment issues are so you can talk them and see your own cycles within them; talk so frequently in therapy that you heal and you can then see how other folks aren't healed making it better on you so that you can see who's healed and start healed relationships.
Having said all of that, I have a Black daughter. I want nothing but the best for her. If she brought home a man that loved her that wasn't Black, as long as that man loved her as much as she loves herself, I wouldn't mind. Sistahs, if ya'll are loved beyond measure from non-Black men, I'm for you and for that. I do think that we'll all heal eventually and Black relationships will see themselves become wholesome again.
This is absolutely true. Thank you for sharing.
@@SharonMRoss-by1lc you're welcome.
Ladies, I have been married to my husband for 21 years and I think sometimes women overlook the strong, educated, laid back black men. Women, oftentimes, pay attention to the wrong type of man. Make sure you pay attention to the men that treat their grandparents well or who are not interested in partying all the time…those are the ones you want that make wonderful husbands.
Nobody’s writing off all black woman. We are pointing out clearly what type of black woman that we want and don’t want
Rebecca, you're speaking TRUTH to the 10th power.... I agree... ALOT of our black brothers are walking around broken, unhealed and so damaged. I invested/investing in myself to become the best me and I get so frustrated when I meet some of these grown men and after a few conversations I hear their brokenness and the sad part they are so opposed to healing. I'm Jamaican and I used to say I'd rather stick to my own kind, but chile that's out the window, as I grow, evolve and love the new me, I desire a man who cares as much as I do on healing and self development. I am severely allergic to men who refuse to get healing and become their best selves. I am so broken hearted for them at times and also annoyed with their blindness of needing help. I'll continue to pray that God stirrup their souls to desire healing and go get it... and stay committed until they see change. So true.... most women are working on themselves and the men oh boy let's just say....think nothing is wrong with them.
Yes!! Many of them are SO opposed to healing/therapy and it’s so sad.
80% of Black women are overweight so? Not enough healthy wombs for Black men.
@@tiaraterry1344 yeah it's disappointing. They even have created new platforms encouraging black men to get therapy. However, some still refuse to do the work
She is LYING. The majority of Black men in the USA are NOT "BROKEN" , "DAMAGED" AND "UNHEALED". The majority of black men are EMPLOYED--BLACK MEN OUT-EARN BLACK WOMEN--According to BLACK DEMOGRPAHICS! The MAJORITY OF BLACK MEN are SINGLE AND CHILDLESS! But ...go on believing in this lying "Christian woman's narratives NOT BASED ON ANY STATISTICAL DATA and FACTS!
You really think more black women are healed than black men ? 😂 the lies you women tell yourselves. And most non black men didn’t go through what black men go through .
This woman is talking like other race of men are so dam perfect. TRIFLING DOESNT DISCRIMINATE
This was so good!!! I needed all of this!!! I've been saying these things for years and I'm going to open myself up to other ethnicities. I deserve to be loved and cared for, it doesn't matter what his color. I want who God has for me.
If a product isn't selling, the issue is either the product or the sales person. The problem is never the buyer. To sell a product, you must study the buyer and their needs.
With black women, if they are single, they never look at the mirror to find out why they are not selling. Instead, they blame the men who are not buying.
I was married to a good man for 20 plus years, who was a provider, protector and an exceptional father. He passed away and I was by myself for 5 years before I started dating again. Dating has been a nightmare her in Atlanta! Lady Pope, thank you so much for this message.❤
Write the type of men you want on a vision board and just believe
@@Yourlife_94a 😇
Look outside of that city, possibly the state.
RLP 2017: Black Women's dating standards are DELUSIONAL. I quit coaching Black Women.
RLP 2020 - 2021: I never said Black Women's dating Standards are DELUSIONAL.
RLP 2023: I'm back coaching Black Women. There's not enough Black Men, Black Women should Divest.
RLP 2024: Whatever Grift keeps the money rolling in is what I'll say.
I have been married interracially for over 30 years and let me tell you love is def love. Sometimes we get programmed as black women to assume our men are our birthright. Well both man and woman need the same programming otherwise go with a new program.
This video spoke to my heart and had me in tears because Auntie Rebecca was speaking to my frustration and disappointment in dating black men . I always tried to give them the benefit of the doubt as a good black woman but now I am going to pray and ask God to help me see the ordained man he has for me and send me that man outside of my race. This video gave me hope and a new perspective in trusting God with my love life!
I haven't finished the video...but did she say abandon your race and look for non bm?? I don't think she said that ma. She was just encouraging bw to be open to other races of you want to get married. Not F All bm. Mine you, her husband is a bm...a good bm.
Gotta get it together ma. Cmon now. SMH
She had a completely different message a few years ago.
You won’t even lose weight for black men 🤦♂️
@jayc5756 There's not enough "good" Bm for every BW who wants one...so...there's no choice but to date out.
Take your grievance up with the Tyrones who spent generations NOT raising their sons into manhood.
@@catmouse2882 That's like me saying there's not enough good bw for us bm, so I should date out. Like Cmon now. You Only Need 1 ma. But I you wanna date out, that's up to you ma.
And why do I care about the Tyronne's. If yall gonna keep giving them play all the time, they have NO INCENTIVE To Change ma. It is what it is.
I have literally been preaching this exact message for God knows how long. It needed to be said from THIS source specifically. Praise God 🙏🏾.
I know this was a sacrifice, so thank you so very much for this, Rebecca. God bless you truly. 🙏🏾
No one 'deserves' ANYTHING
Ms. Rebecca you have PREACHEDDDD I am so sick of it!!! Each of your points are verified and accurate. So many beautiful, handsome black guys on my job... none of them want women if they do, theyre already in relationships or flat out hidden. Its so rough out here for us single girls, it hurts sometimes.
This was excellent! 👌🏽I’m a happily, single, black, female OG. I just happened to stumble up on this wonderful video and I’m glad that I took the time to watch it. Thanks! I’m sharing it!
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
I understand where you are coming from Rebecca. This isn't a put down of Black Men. There are some amazing Black men out there...however as a whole Black women should explore outside their race, if they desire marriage or lasting commitments in a partner. You have to change your mindset if you want different results or outcomes. I agree with you! Thanks for the topic.
Since your husband thinks there are so many good ones left, can he introduce me to one.
Correct!!! Lol! Good black men think that most men are like them which is why it’s hard for them to fathom the crisis that black men are in.
@@RebeccaLynnPope Your husband has common sense, you don't lol
This is a wonderful video ! I could not have articulated this any better. 😍🤗. Thank you for saying what we have not been able to.
STIOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
The way you communicate so clearly is just powerful! Thank you for this message. I hope all Black women hear you 🙏🏾❤
I agree RLP! As a single black woman I have definitely opened up my options and have had far more success dating out in terms of quality. It’s unfortunate, but I’d encourage any woman who is interested in marriage to be open to all races of men.
What spaces are you in to be approached by other races of men? I’m open, but don’t know where to start. I’ve never been approached by another race in the grocery store- let’s say.
STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
@@Bre_Inspired_ I met my current bf who happens to be white at a food & wine festival in my city. Social events & establishments that encourage mingling is the best way to go! Most people want to be in and out of grocery stores quickly. Go places where people are lingering and talking to others.
Ex. Rooftop lounges, networking happy-hours, local events that interest you that attract at least 50% men.
So what rebecca is saying that black men were not raised to be husbands but black women who are from the same community were raised to be wives. Can someone please explain this to me?
Blk males abandon their own sons and don't teach them anything about manhood and providing for their families.
It's not that difficult to grasp.
I absolutely understand what you say. I am a Black woman who pursued a career first to secure my future. Not realizing that I was sacrificing my "prime." Now, I am engaged (getting married next April) to a white man. Like you, I don't have the financial pressure any longer. I am living my dream. For all the single Black ladies, get yourself permission to at least try to date out of your race. Just try it.
5-6 Years ago Aunt Rebecca quit being a match maker for Black women because she said black women are too difficult to please . She says that black women were passing up all the good black men😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I will be 48 in August, and have never been married. I am sorry to say, but I am over it. Marriage is no longer on mind. I am just trying to reach my other goals before I die... I have no time for drama, games, or time to train an adult man. If a man of God comes in my life, or not, I am good☺️
Blk Women choose bums over Blk men of quality all the time
Well said ❤ almost brought me to tears. You’re absolutely right, it is time for us to be seen for how wonderful we are in our divine feminine and not just the help or support. ❤❤❤ nuff love to you
The video I never knew I needed. Thank you. I am going to start praying for God to open up my mind and heart to all races and let love in. 🙏🏽 I still love black men but will now allow myself to be open to loving other men as well.
🙌🏾👏🏽💎 It takes courage to share the truth with love. This is love for your sisters and I for one truly appreciate your heartfelt support! I’ve been married twice , both black men. One who tried to beat me into submission and the other who left me with 2 children under the age of 2. Through God’s Grace ,therapy and self discovery I realized that I deserve someone who loves me and treats me like a queen…the nationality just makes it interesting 👑
This message has been a LONG TIME COMING. Yes, we as black women need to prioritize our health and long term happiness over how tall a man is, or how much money he makes or how good looking he is or his race or ethnicity. We need to prioritize CHARACTER, MASCULINE ENERGY, and relationship with God! We have been so focused on for so long all the things that don’t really matter. Sold a bill of goods that doesn’t even take our true happiness into account. I encourage all black women to put yourself WAY out there and use a totally different measuring stick to determine the best man for you. Just TRY IT. What can it hurt? AND it may actually help.😉💯🙏🏽❤️
*** STOP LISTENING TO WITCHES
Black men have been saying this for years everything you listed in your comment.
I'm so glad I'm married to my black wife..
I'm a corny dude who spent the better part of my life being rejected by black women.
With that said. I been passed over numerous times by black women who ended up choosing men who ran out on them.
We all got choices. Peace is a choice. 🤷🏿♂️
GOOD >!!!!!***>>>> THIS IS A WITCH ...NEVER DAATE OUIT OF YO RACE
There's rejection (which everyone goes thru) and then there's outright hatred.
SO? Are you back-tracking from your statements that many black women are single because of unrealistic expectations and requirements?
Black women's expectations are the same as other women. The problem is that our community is so dysfunctional and most of our men are so broken that normal expectations ( loyalty, a job, car, place to live- house or apartment) "appear" to be unrealistic.
She was saying that the black women she encountered had desires to marry the same type of men. Basically 6ft, 6pack and 6figures (666) and then fine like a movie star. When a lot of good men do not meet that criteria, and those that do, have too many options and don't want the women that want them.
Because years ago a Pod she said that women had unrealistic expectations...she gave up coaching them...she is talking TH-cam manosphere talking points we have the receipt
@chavelahutchinson2657
Real journalist with REAL statistical data.
1. The average income of Black women is 35k to 40k a year.
2. Only about 10 percent of all Black women in the USA make 6 figures.
3. Black men out earn Black women in income from 41k up to 50k on average.
4. The majority of men over 6 feet tall in the USA are around 14% to 20%
5. The majority of Black men are NOT "dysfunctional ", "unemployed " or "Broken ". You need to do ACTUAL RESEARCH instead of spitting out false stereotypical untrue narratives about Black men.
@myronscott8611 both things can be true. In that world (black women who can afford a dating service in ATL), I'm sure there were a lot of shallow expectations. There are still a lot of woman who will look over a good man because he isn't the right height. But now she is teaching a dating class, more likely with more genuine women, who likely aren't the same population she was serving before. Now her message is go where you can be loved appropriately, no matter the race.
EXCELLENT ADVICE!!! Very thoughtful, loving, and considerate advice!
As a black woman who has dated w
White, Asian, and Black men, I agree with this message.
Did any of them want to marry you, would you have accepted? Just curious.
She didn't just get passed around the black community. She got passed around the Asian and white community too and got the same results.
@@steveanderson5504I love seeing how delusional black women are lol
So how's your marriage going? Was it a white, Asian, or Black Man who finally proposed to you? What have you learned from dating out
@mariebakerchats why are more black men married than black women ?
We are not raising our girls to be a good, Godly humans,wives and mothers NOR our boys to be good, Godly humans, husbands and fathers. The FAMILY is what should always come first.
My dad used to demand that I marry a black man. He passed away 10 years ago. I’m married to an amazing Hispanic man. We’re similar in so many ways, and our cultures blend well. Not that it matters. Love is love!
Thank you for always utilizing your platform to spread awareness by speaking on ALL the harsh truths that most keep to themselves because it’s simply easier. Since sooo many people today can’t handle the truth because they’re usually not living in accordance with their own😮
Its all kinds of other men out here. Asian, Hispanic, native American, Indian etc.
I’m definitely tired… I want to be married again and be given the opportunity to be truly loved and cared for!
Same 🙌🏽💕🙏🏽
I am 60 I have been through all this, this is so True 💯I want to get married again and I am looking at all my options and praying 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽thank you ❤
I'm 62/man and have been thru it all as well. She's not wrong here, she's just focused on A side of a multi sided issue.
The adoption by black women of western feminism was and is a major factor in this schism as well... Women (write large) THINK they get to define what & who is attractive FOR men. 🤷🏽♂️ Too many women think they're masculine traits & accomplishments make them higher value to men!? 👀 Utter craziness.
Smh… not many want marriage after retirement or after being married. Marriage is very hard for elders