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I assume they talked before the filming and decided that they should be less strict in favor of having more exposure - people aren't going to want to watch this if all they see is her being strict with her students.
All good etiquette teachers should be this way! My etiquette teacher was fabulous and super understanding (took it as a child because my adoptive grandfather cared about it). After my many times failing at walking and posture because of ankle issues, she worked with me to show what I can do to still have a presence. She then said she thought the shashay walk method might suit me more to help hide my bad ankle. My teacher even worked with wheelchair bound ppl to show them how even rolling around with good posture or holding your head up can bring presence to the room. Fantastic class. Really opened my eyes to how taking a few etiquette lessons is for everyone.
@@lucia1982 I'm sorry you had a strict teacher. My experience was so inclusive, understanding and loose with her roles. I guess my teacher cared more about bringing basic manners into the 21st century.
@@bookcrazy001 thats great good for you i mean we are kids after all and the point is to learn manners but i kinda get why she was the way she was. However i dont agree with many things that formed part of the "etiquette' like if youre overwight is considered unclassy, or if youre not white looking, or gay specially as a girl, or be like short, etc
Right? Kelsey said her dad was really uncomfortable and embarrassed about the plate thing, followed up with Lisa saying “they were making him more comfortable!”
@@constantly_nerfed I'm from Sweden and one time during the nobel banquet a lady who sat next to the queen put her handbag on the table and the queen did the same thing.
@@constantly_nerfed They were trying to anyway. He happened to notice it and thus felt more like a twit, but it clearly was their intention to try and put him at ease by doing the same thing instead of making him stand out with everyone else doing the 'correct' action. There is a story about Queen Elizabeth and a visiting dignitary that drank out of what was supposed to be a finger bowl - so she did too. I imagine he was less familiar with customs and probably didn't notice any hesitation on everyone else'ss parts, whereas Kelsey's dad immediately picked up on his oops. Just because they failed, doesn't mean it wasn't a nice gesture.
I was forced to go to ettiquette classes as a kid. It was one of the more insulting decisions my mother made when I was little. I was kicked out the first day for goofing off though... I did the walrus thing with the utensils. The lady was so mad she grabbed my hand and took me downstairs to another classroom where she opened the door and shouted "I have another one for you!" and then left. It was a drama class. Loved itttttttt... But my mom was furious so I didn't get to stay in it.
@@Affluent_Pomegranate Ya, sure... Abusive alcoholics who expect their children to bend to their entire will and live up to unrealistic expectations because they have undealt with trauma of their own make great mothers. Get a grip.
From a small Indian city, eating using hands, I came to Cambridge university, formal dinners in University's colleges are a common thing here. I remember going through a very very good course on the internet to learn how to eat. She gave the tip BMW, bread, meal and water/wine from the left to right. I never have made a mistake. My eating etiquettes are spot on. I still use my hands to eat at home.
@@mastershooter64Pizza and chips/crisps are rarely served during a formal dinner. Pizza is commonly eaten with a knife and fork though in some countries.
I think it should be the same for a person that grew up with more Western European ettiquette rules, when they would visit your city in India. They would have to learn how the eating rules are there. How to eat properly with their hands. It's really just a different style, but ettiquete (rules of behaviour) regardless!
@@mastershooter64 Not really, in my opinion. I have a friend who grew up eating pizza with a fork and knife at home. If I'm eating in a pizza restaurant, I would also eat with knife and fork.
I love how the instructor mentioned that good manners are about being respectful of others, about how they feel and their personal space. It's true that today most people aren't aware of that at all.
@@sakuraesther6309 Yep. Don't stoop down to others levels. If someone is very intolerable though, stay away from them. But do not speak ill because that will reflect to others what you actually see in yourself.
@@sakuraesther6309 Absolutely! The height of poor manners is pointing out someone else's bad manners. 🙂 Unfortunately, many these days take it as an opportunity to criticize or drop to an even lower level.
@@stuffmewithpasta756yes! I like to think if it like Uncle Iroh from Avatar the Last Airbender. No matter how rude anyone is to him, he keeps his composure and politely stands his ground.
*Fun fact:* While Kelsey's bread/drink memory rule is a nice trick, it's actually the opposite in Sweden, so if you're ever invited to the Nobel banquet you need to unlearn that. Also don't clink glasses. *Ever!* When you toast at informal dinners in Sweden you raise your glasses, look around the table and say "Skål". At formal dinners there's a whole procedure of nodding at people (For men: left, right, opposite. For women: right, left, opposite.) before drinking, and then you nod at everyone in the opposite way before lowering your glass.
I know, there's so many different styles of dining, with Continental styles and American, and with Continental the rules change based on which country you might be in. it's very confusing.
They are very relevant skills. In graduate school I found myself eating dinner at a Supreme Court justices house. His wife was VERY into proper etiquette at the dinner table. So I learned and was SO thankful I did my research!
Chris you were already a natural at this... I think your score should have been higher but it is etiquette to make ladies feel better so they got higher scores lols.
Greetings from Edmonton City, Canada. Your Username is literally Fart ;) i chuckled because that is the most un-etiquette concept. imagine farting at a fancy dinner!
The handshake part reminded me of my typing teacher in middle school. He was in business, and we had to shake his hand the professional way before entering the classroom. If we did it wrong, we had to go to the back of the line and do it again.
can be a spoiled brat in Philippines as well.. one who expects to have anything he/she wanted.. which most of the time, they get as they wish for real. 😁
Shortly after HS graduation, some friends and I were invited to a Navy Ball by a friend in the military. My grandmother was big into etiquette and dining. So when the table setting was a full setting I was not thrown at all. But everyone, my friends and the military students at my table were lost. My friends knew just to grab whatever utensil I did because I warned them of it. It was amusing because the commander stopped by the table to greet us since we were off base guests and I could see that he was amused that no one at the table would touch anything unless I did it first. 😂
Military Dinner - you do not touch your port (after dinner drink) until the highest ranking person/host has toasted to the queen - then you wait for all the other toasts to finish before you can drink casually
Ditto on our junior-senior trip, which was a cruise with full dinner service every night! I was a band nerd and certainly had friends, but by the second night the cheerleaders wanted to sit at our table. lol
Michelle - you've actually highlighted a very interesting aspect of etiquette in your videos and I thank you for it. The 'traditions' of many cultural forms of etiquette are HUGE indicators of class when you are with other people. While it may not matter to some folks whether you bow at the right moment or know which side to start using utensils from, to others it is a very obvious indicator of whether you grew up with wealth. If you don't have it, you either grew up poor and aren't aware of it, are new money and never learned it, or your wealthy family didn't care enough to teach it to you - which are important cues for others that want to know. My mother's family was hyper aware of dining and serving etiquette due to high end restaurant work, but they did not grow up with the money that my father's family did and with that came a whole bunch of different rules of behavior. My grandmother made sure all of her grandchildren were properly instructed on these types of cultural indicators as a matter of maintaining 'class appearances' even though our families no longer lived within that world of wealth. While many etiquette schools will argue that teaching 'basic manners' is just the right thing to do in a polite society (which I respect completely), it nonetheless does function as a class indicator and is fascinating in that respect - speaking as someone who has to chameleon their way through social events occasionally.
It would be nice to see etiquette as an elective of sorts. I learned through similar circumstances, and I always thought if it was more widely accessible it would be seen as fairly positive. Treating each other as equals, being civil, showing respect for others and oneself, all those things are helpful not only at a business dinner but in general too. Obviously, depending on time and place but still something I think younger generations would be able to give a more inclusive meaning to. 🤷🏻♀️
In the south, we call this Charm School. I attended at 14 and learned to sit, stand, enter and exit a vehicle, which piece of silverware to use when, even how to properly introduce the President to the Queen (the method depends on whether you're American or British!). That, along with a semester of golf in college, put me in good stead when I entered business! Honestly, none of it really matters, but her message is absolutely correct: good manners give you confidence, and they ensure you're paying attention to the comfort of others. Many of us could use Charm School in the past few years!
I loved the "do you want your dress zipped all the way in the back" part, such a gentle way of calling someone out like maybe they like it partly unzipped 🤷♀️🤣
I do think an important lesson this provides is on mindfulness, because she had a really good point about people often times not respecting others' personal space and it's good to keep in mind habits you have that can be actively intrusive. But the side the bread plate is on? Not drinking first if you're the subject of a toast? Your dress zipper accidentally being a bit down? Your back not being allowed to touch the back of a chair (dafuq is the back of the chair there for, then??). These are things that are only really offensive due to not adhering to an expectation, rather than being any sort of intrusive or aggressive. Imo, if you see someone leaning back in a chair and your first thought is they're uninterested, that says way more about you. I've seen some people who lean back because of disinterest, but have also seen plenty who lean back because they're pensive and processing what they're being told. It doesn't represent disengagement, it represents receptiveness. I think there's a certain point where you're being so self aware that you become self-centered, and are more concerned about your current state than the situation and people around you. It's a balancing act, being mindful of your bearing on a situation but also reserving brainspace for organic communication, observation, and empathy. High-class "manners" like this are too far to one extreme methinks.
That’s why it’s to put everyone at ease I believe. If everyone is on one accord and knows how to properly use certain utensils and how to carry themselves it makes for a real comfortable environment, because you know what to expect. Also eating with people who don’t have table manner makes some feel very uneasy. It’s a matter of perspective.
@@loria287 perhaps, but most people I know who have been in these scenarios (mind you, I came from one of those families that did this shit) almost always end up being the one who are emotionally falling apart from the pressure of perfection and keeping up appearances. Not exactly some uncommon phenomena I don't think.
When her dad moved that bowl to the right, everyone did the same to make him feel better. But if he himself had to make others feel better, he would need to never move the bowl. That's how etiquettes work...
@@briargray2355 that’s because there’s a fine line between having proper etiquette and obsessing over it. Like she said during the dining portion about how the other men switched plates for the sake of Kelsey’s dad. If they obsessed over etiquette they would’ve all looked at him like a moron instead they all went along with what he did because he didn’t know in order to not make him feel like he’s sticking out
Ok this video is great love it love everything about it. @3:49 when he sat with better poster he actually looks tense and doesn't want to be there vs when he sat more relaxed he looked approachable.
Dope story about the businessmen switching plates for her dad. Great tip about b and d. My mom made me study Emily Post and Amy Vanderbilt when I became a teen. So many rules and guidelines to remember. It truly is a lost art, even amongst the upper echelon.
My grandmother had to go through finishing school in the early 1910s and put all of us through the training, she made it fun though! It all was a game and I am so grateful that she taught us everything she knew. Her first lesson was to be polite and afford everyone you met the same respect you expected to receive, but take no shit. She was a true lady lol.
@capuchinosofia4771 For poise, my sister and I had to walk to the end of the hall and back with a book on the head and a teacup of water properly held in our hand, she wanted us to glide when we walked, not stomp. Made everything a bit of a competition, but for fun and not prizes or one upping each other.
@@leolapennington264 soo, did that help? I feel like I walk wrong and have been wanting to try that. I'm good with etiquettes I'll say, eating, talking, dressing etc except for walking. I feel like I'm 'heavy footed' if that's even a word 😅
@@MichelleKhare Michelle I really love your content but notice you often only respond to other verified creators with a large following, would be nice for you to respond to your other viewers when you have time. We love and support you too❤️
I loved finishing school, it did me so good and I use my etiquette to this day. Opened so many business doors for me and made me so much money. People feel comfortable around me and very well respected. In fact, somehow they feel they can trust me too, which I honor of course. I love etiquette. I feel good around people who know how to carry themselves.
i grew up in an insanely etiquette strict home but everyone in my family feared my grandma who used to tie wooden desks to our backs in order to good posture and it’s quite a challenge to dine with her at the same table
That sounds good, I wanted to have some when I was a teenager but my parents aren't instructed in it. I got in many embarrassing stuff in school (it was a rich kid school - I wasn't one of them despite beeing in the same space -) because they all knew, but I didn't so I mostly looked like an idiot. Sometimes kids almost a decade youger would come and slip tips to me (as young as 4 or 5 years 'cause I have a soft spot for kids and used to help them in their play pretend endeavors and they helped me back in politeness). The tips where things like: there is a proper way to raise a question, to sit, to sneeze and most things. Young kids are very honest in teaching and don't try to embarrass you, older ones not so much.
Wow...five years? Did you have to take notes? Did you have a textbook? I had "lady lessons" at home with my grandmother. I learned a lot from her, but I've always wanted to know more.
I am very grateful that my Danish grandmother taught me all this as a child. Even with little money, we always attached great importance to etiquette. That gave me a sense of security later on, even at the biggest diplomatic events.
This video was not long enough! I love that you invited your friends to join. I love Kelsey too, and you can tell she has experience popping open a bottle of champagne lol. The Princess Diaries is one of my favorite movies, and this reminded me of it so much. Especially the dining portion. The lady who taught the class was so nice even though you messed some things up
man im glad i didn’t grow up with parents that care about manners. people criticize them but being more free as a child honestly makes the biggest difference as a teen now. i grew up burping loudly at the table, eating with my hands/tortillas, and being hella vulgar at home and it worked out very well for me. obviously i don’t do it in public but i enjoyed my childhood
I learned all of these etiquette rules from my grandma, to the point I do it unconsciously. I do love that they show the 'putting other at ease' and not embarrassing people who don't know! I'm so glad, great episode! :DDDD
I remember when I took a Business Etiquette Dinner workshop in college and it was a lot of fun!!! One trick that I taught my brother is when we are eating or finished eating, the way you place your fork and knife in certain positions will signal the servers what you want done to your plate. It is very interesting.
It is, it's very important how you position your utensils on the plate. It's kind of a silent feedback to the chef and also to the servers, it's easier for them to read your opinion on the entire setting. It's really fun, I have been doing this for years so it's kind of muscle memory to always know what to do
Ive been reading a lot of fantasy historical manhwa(romance and more on the reincarnation revenge etc.) and it really inspire me to learn more about etiquettes the this vid shows up well what a great timing ig
Wow, Kelsey's story about her father really changed my perspective about the ettiquete and manner. The fact that they all changed their plates for one person is really great. Still, it must be very embarrassing for him 😆
12:55 this is so very true! People not educated in etiquette or manners don't have the self awareness, just that alone can save you. Someone's self-space must always be respected. Because many people are not aware of this, I often have to establish mine because this behavior is not commonly known anymore.
Its giving: “to be a princess is to know which spoon to use, to be a princess is a thousand pairs of shoes, to retain a regal gait leave the parsley on your plate, stay quiet, detached and yet amused, to be a princess is to never be confused (doo doo doo doo do doo doo doo) do a plié and never fall, dont ever stray from protocol all through the day theres just one way you must behave” if u get that reference, we’re besties now 😌
This is truly a forgotten art. There’s nothing snobby about having proper etiquette and encouraging others to have it too. It’s about having respect for where you are, who you are with, and most importantly who you are yourself. Nobody likes someone who is a slob, or someone who can never decompress every once in a while.
Or we can stop taking life seriously 24/7/365 and act according to a given situation while still being yourself. There's a time and place for extreme formality.
Trying to learn how to be in a marching band could be really cool! you’d have to learn to play the Instrument plus how to March properly and memorize drill, it’s a lot harder than it looks and I think it could be a cool video
Ha. Yes. She could do a series about "going back to school" and do some school challenges starting with marching band, football, or some kind of team sport & explore so of the challenges teen face.
See this is why I don't like Ultra proper etiquette. Just be courteous and respectful to others. If anybody's going to make a big deal about you choosing the wrong utensil, then maybe trying to tell them that you don't really care about this sort of thing in a nice way.
I mostly agree, but from my understanding no one ever makes a big deal about trivial things like that, that's just for movies. Like the story with the bread plate, it's not something you mention, it's just something people go along with (especially if they know that you are not as familiar with the etiquette).
@@mothma_am mainly the people who judge are the ones who take the classes from a young age and have grown up on that world. In my experience i do see when people dont have "proper" etiquette but never really say anything to their faces
i agree somewhat... i think in most scenarios the average american wouldn't use these techniques too much. however, it's good to learn basic proper etiquette in case you get invited to a fancy event or something, because it shows that you respect the people you're with and it can gain you respect also. and even though it may seem a bit overkill, i think the main point is to teach discipline. it's kinda the same thing with being on a drill team or in a marching band. i don't know exactly what good playing a tuba or tossing a rifle in the air is going to do for you in life, but the patience, presence, posture, time management, discipline, self-awareness, and respect of authority you learn will take you very far
iirc it's more of so the ppl who knows ultra proper etiquette looks at ppls etiquette and base their social/financial status off of that. Other than that yeah i deffo agree with u
It'd be cool to go to Racing School, or like Training like a pro drag racer. Something along those lines. There was a little bit of it during the Police Academy, but it'd be cool to see it more indepth. Also with Porshe's first female GT racer in the Middle East there'd be nice tie in to current events.
She could collaborate with the Cleetus McFarland channel. He has his own speedway and he holds oval stock car races, drift events, as well as burn out competitions and he has set records for drag racing. He could have her running an 8 second quarter mile in one day.
I don't think there's any school for drag racing. It's just holding your car straight and shifting at the right point after all. There's schools for any other kind of racing though.
@@jsplit9716 I don't know about schools, but there are people who teach and there are different licenses based on how fast you run a quarter mile. No, drag racing isn't just about shifting and holding the car straight. Watching the Cleetus channel, you can see how they have to steer to compensate for what the car does and track conditions. They explain all the issues they run into. Staging can be complex, especially for a higher level car. The burnout is done a certain way and then they roll up to the first beams and set a trans brake and get the engine on a 2 step so the turbos build boost, then hit the bump button on the steering wheel to get into the second beams. Breaking the second set starts the count down of lights. At the end of the track a parachute (sometimes 2) has to be pulled and then gathered up afterward. There are different types of drag races....some have a bracket or goal time such as 8.5 seconds. If you go faster, your time doesn't count, so you want to stay closer than your opponents. Like many topics she covers, it seems simple and can be for a mild car at slow times, but the advanced/pro races are quite complex. There is plenty for her to make a video and even in a one day shoot, there would be more details than the etiquette video. I thought this one was lacking/short compared to her other videos.
Sitting like a stiff dog at attention, with perfect posture is super off putting - it’s quite literally, the antithesis of being relaxed/comfortable. Relaxed, comfortable people are affable and comfortable to be around.
I agree. Especially the position males are suppose to sit in, really looks like a dog waiting for a treat and is so offputting... Not having them spread their legs: fine, but sitting with a super staight back and not being allowed to put their hands anywhere but on the knees, it's ridiculous and not something anyone does outside of royal circles.
I agree. And the way the guy sits at 3:51 actually gives me the impression that he wants to leave very soon, that is how I would interpret it if I saw it in real life. They dont sit like they have "settled"
Yeah I was gonna say, that "proper sitting posture" doesn't signal "paying attention" to me, it signals "they're too focused on their posture to listen to anything I'm saying"
To me, it's kind of revealing that after being taught all of these strict rules which are supposed to govern our behaviour in every setting, the "grades" that Lisa gave were more-or-less arbitrary.
I really like how she mentioned that a person is judged within the first 7 seconds of meeting his or her acquaintance … just like TH-cam ads. It’s very true. It happens in job interviews too. Non-verbal communication is everything.
I used to watch your channel so much. Life has been so hectic and I found it again. I remember being blown away by your courage to try new things when I first watched. I’m so glad to be here again.
I am the epitome of why the hell do we need this. And I am here to say that the attitude has prevailed. I don't know why we are trying to changes ourselves. It is okay to sneeze in the napkin and okay to use your elbow. It is okay to drink after somebody thanked you and okay to wait. I hate it that their are so many ways to be perfect but these ways are not taught when we are growing up. This means that the perfect we are trying to learn is a perfect of some dream society that we conjure in our head. The queen and the Princess has to sit in a certain pose? Why? Just to show that they are confident? But we know they are. I don't know. This is frustrating
I love how at the meeting the other people at the table switched their bread plates to be respectful towards her dad and not to humiliate him. I just thinks that so sweet💕 Also I really like the instructor she reminds of that strict,but caring great aunt that you love and are scared of at the same time.
Well that's just because etiquette it's cultural. Most people learn the one from their country, but if you are someone who travels a lot for work (or anything formal), you'll have to learn basic etiquette from the major cultures. It's just good manners.
for anyone who doesnt know, etiquette means :" the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.". I Just LOVE the way Michelle is soo brave at everything!!!
They were like three Musketeers in this & laughing like kids on each, i’ve been taught etiquette and I wouldn’t have laughed at all around such a expert 😊 but i loved how fun you guys had 😁
Honestly Michelle and Kelsey's duo is so underrated and fun! Watching em since buzzfeed. Also Michelle's energy is so wholesome and calming. I love watching you take on such challenges
What I love about you and your videos is that you are so sweet, awesome, gorgeous, fun, and so much more. I am almost 15 and you inspire me to grow up with a healthy lifestyle and you obviously show that woman can do pretty much everything. Thank you for inspiring me to be a better and healthy person. I’m so glad I found your channel
I am in love with your videos! you literally motivate me alot with trying new things and trying to achieve things that I have never tried before! thank you so much for taking your time to create these awesome videos. All the love and support from Indonesia
I prefer the balkan etiquette, relaxed, friendly and familiy way ! Its more natural and u dont have to overthink everything and still be happy and not be judged
I wish etiquette was a mandatory class in American public schools, and taught exactly the same way this lady does. Maybe then all the boys who supposedly (according to their female friends) liked me would have simply introduced themselves to me and asked me out. Granted, I still would’ve said “no,” because I only date people Who I actually have romantic feelings for, and that only happens when I already know and like the person but it would’ve made me feel much more respected and made me respect them in turn.
After I heard this on this instagram live I was so excited to see this video! Chris and Kelsey was such a great addition, this was definitely worth the wait!
When she said it was her wedding china, I suddenly got flashbacks about my mom's own collection and how dead I was going to be if anything happened to it.
I do recall some of the dining etiquette from my home economics class my senior year of High School. This just refreshed my memory, thank you!!!!! Great job Michelle!!!!!!
Just a reminder for all, that the American (high society) way is not the same as the ‘European way’ (which may only be the western European way…). These are different from elsewhere too. Do review before going to whichever location... Take care 😇
I'm so glad etiquette isn't like this any more. It feels so fake and uptight when you do it like this. I think people are way more interesting when they don't have to watch out to do anything wrong. And don't get me wrong, you can still be polite and don't eat like a pig and everything but just a little bit more relaxed is way better.
The fact that she seems so much more confident in every video . Show how much shes realy growing as a creator and person .i love her videos so much keep up the great work 💕
In Germany, actually, one of the first instructors of good manners was a man called Freiherr von Knigge. The problem was, that, with the industrial revolution, many people who did not have the upper class upbringing became rich. But they were often regarded as inferior by ancient rich families because they did not know how to behave properly and often felt isolated on the parties. To help them to adapt and to make more friends and to feel less isolated, Freiherr von Knigge wrote a book about suitable manners. It became extremely popular, and the funny thing was that even the ancient rich families used it to educate their children to behave properly. The lady who instructed you reminded me a lot on that Freiherr von Knigge because what she wanted to do was to help people to fit in the upper class society even if they were not born into it. Thanks for showing us your training.
Had fun with this video! My mom taught my sister and me the basics of this stuff when we were very young (late 1950's; Emily Post, anyone?) Pleased to see that it stuck, but I wanted to learn more about the place setting and all those glasses. IIRC, the shape is important as well as position in the arrangement.
You are so determined to overcome these hard obstacles with no experience. Keep up the great work and love your content! For your next challenge, you can train like a soccer player. Being in a traveling team is quite hard but there is A LOT of skill involved. Totally reccomend.
It's interesting to see how this differs by country. In my country (UK, specifically England), its customary to ALWAYS smooth your skirt down when you sit down - I remember my mum telling me off multiple times when I was younger. The way that we hold cutlery and glasses is also different - the pinky finger goes around the stem of the glass while the rest of your hand grips the bowl. Elbows never leaning on the table was also something I was told off a lot for when I was younger
Interesting to hear! I was taught (living in Germany) to never grip a glass with a stem on the top, you are supposed to hold it only on the stem. Everything comes of as uneducated or to drunk to hold a glass properly
@@davielawrence3773 here in America, and I'm also from Germany and have lived in Europe, it is the same that you hold the stem, but with flutes, we rest our forefinger just below the cup. normally they're much heavier due to the crystal and quality vs. a wine glass. if you have any part of your hand on the cup portion, it warms the drink and smudges the glass.
I am American and currently live in America but have lived in several countries. From what I was taught in etiquette school what you stated was accurate. Although certain glasses require different handling.
Maybe I'm odd, but I've always found etiquette to be directly counterproductive. I don't think the goal was ever to "make people feel at ease" (and if it was, giving people countless minor rules to constantly keep track of is an awful way of doing it), I think it was about conformity. People prefer the world they inhabit to be predictable, so they try to make people fit one mold and follow one set of procedures. It's also mildly ableist in that it imposes the same standards on people regardless of the accommodations they need (e.g., posture for people with back problems, conversational rules for people with social anxiety/autism/ADHD/etc.). I know none of it is meant to be hard and fast, but I think when evaluating our behavior, we should be more concerned with how we make others feel than how closely we match an arbitrary set of rules.
My mother told me that keeping attention to your posture is to simply stand more upright and feel a little more confident and for most people it works and at big dinner tables, rules like "keep your elbows off the table" are simply to not bother the person next to you and so that everyone has their appropriate amount of space. And it all depends on the other guests, just like she said it is actually about comfort. But in modern days and with various different situations we often don't need most of those etiquette rules. I just think it is important to know them and know why and when you need them, just in case 🤷🏻♀️. But that is just my take on this and maybe I got it wrong.
Well, you mentioned it, people prefer their world to be predictable, in that way etiquette does put people at ease. It's definitely ablisst and arguable classist too, but as someone with social anxiety I actually prefer more formal functions because I have hard coded rules I can follow. (i.e. I'd feel more at ease at a wedding than a large college party.)
I think it's important to remember people who follow that ettiquiete have been doing it, and have known it for so long they aren't constantly monitoring yourself like you and countless others seem to make It out to be. It's like breathing? In a way.
Interestingly this video helps me to brush up my etiquette for an upcoming interview in a MNC without actually taking paid up physical classes for absolutely free 😅 Thank you Michelle❤ Lots of love from India 🇮🇳
I love these challenge accepted episodes! Keep up the good work Michelle!!!!! I also had the idea that you can try becoming a contortionist. There are so many great contortionists out there who I am sure would be willing to help and so many tutorials. I would love to see this and it would make me so happy to see you try this. I also think the contortion is so cool and would such a good challenge for you.
Michelle, your videos are really inspiring, and the multitude of skills you showcase that are generally considered „talent” show that anyone can really do anything if they actually try enough. I have been checking most of your videos, and was thinking of a few additional Challenges for you to (hopefully) accept. - Programming - Create something original. Whether it's a website, a mobile app or a PC program, make something original from scratch using any programming / scripting languages you want. - Languages - Learn any language outside your comfort zone at a basic conversational level, and test it in the native country. If you were to choose Romanian or Estonian, I would feel really proud of that :D - Dancing - Learn any kind of dance style (preferably with a partner, preferably with Garrett :D ) that you have never attempted before. I hope you get to see this comment :D Thank you for making such quality content, we are looking forward to more!
I didn't even realize that when the video started it made me go all tense and kept my back straight until it ended because I immediately slouched and sighed.
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We are looking forward to it! 🤩
I can’t wait!
We’re are so excited you are making new videos!❤️❤️
IM HERE FOR IT! I FOUND YOU YESTERDAY, AND INSTANTLY BECAME A FAN. I really like the 911 jobs, and the military challenge accepted!
AHHHHHHHHHHHH! I'M SO EXCITED!!!!!
I’m glad the instructor wasn’t super strict like the stereotype. She was very informative and also had a sense of humor.
Yup and its weird to see cause ive gone to etiquette school non stop since i was like 6 im 17 and usually teachers are like very strict
I assume they talked before the filming and decided that they should be less strict in favor of having more exposure - people aren't going to want to watch this if all they see is her being strict with her students.
All good etiquette teachers should be this way! My etiquette teacher was fabulous and super understanding (took it as a child because my adoptive grandfather cared about it). After my many times failing at walking and posture because of ankle issues, she worked with me to show what I can do to still have a presence. She then said she thought the shashay walk method might suit me more to help hide my bad ankle. My teacher even worked with wheelchair bound ppl to show them how even rolling around with good posture or holding your head up can bring presence to the room. Fantastic class. Really opened my eyes to how taking a few etiquette lessons is for everyone.
@@lucia1982 I'm sorry you had a strict teacher. My experience was so inclusive, understanding and loose with her roles. I guess my teacher cared more about bringing basic manners into the 21st century.
@@bookcrazy001 thats great good for you i mean we are kids after all and the point is to learn manners but i kinda get why she was the way she was. However i dont agree with many things that formed part of the "etiquette' like if youre overwight is considered unclassy, or if youre not white looking, or gay specially as a girl, or be like short, etc
I love that she says that etiquette is about making people feel at ease, followed up by making them feel ill at ease.
Right? Kelsey said her dad was really uncomfortable and embarrassed about the plate thing, followed up with Lisa saying “they were making him more comfortable!”
@@constantly_nerfed I'm from Sweden and one time during the nobel banquet a lady who sat next to the queen put her handbag on the table and the queen did the same thing.
@@constantly_nerfed They were trying to anyway. He happened to notice it and thus felt more like a twit, but it clearly was their intention to try and put him at ease by doing the same thing instead of making him stand out with everyone else doing the 'correct' action. There is a story about Queen Elizabeth and a visiting dignitary that drank out of what was supposed to be a finger bowl - so she did too. I imagine he was less familiar with customs and probably didn't notice any hesitation on everyone else'ss parts, whereas Kelsey's dad immediately picked up on his oops. Just because they failed, doesn't mean it wasn't a nice gesture.
@@mlast2181 lol that reminds me of the Shrek dinner scene
Lady got jokes
you should try nanny school next! They go all out and train nannies to take care of royal children and everything. it's no joke
This is actually a video we've been working on for a while!! Hopefully we can make it happen soon. :)
@@MichelleKhare I can't wait!
YAY
Lol
I’ve heard of that lol
I was forced to go to ettiquette classes as a kid. It was one of the more insulting decisions my mother made when I was little. I was kicked out the first day for goofing off though... I did the walrus thing with the utensils. The lady was so mad she grabbed my hand and took me downstairs to another classroom where she opened the door and shouted "I have another one for you!" and then left. It was a drama class. Loved itttttttt... But my mom was furious so I didn't get to stay in it.
Okay honestly.. maybe it was a bit harsh but I love that she did that. Thats hilarious.
Omg the walrus thing!? Haha always makes me laugh. I would’ve been dragged away too just for laughing with you 😅
insulting was your behavior towards the instructor and the class. I wish there were more mothers like yours
@@Affluent_Pomegranate Ya, sure... Abusive alcoholics who expect their children to bend to their entire will and live up to unrealistic expectations because they have undealt with trauma of their own make great mothers. Get a grip.
@@Affluent_Pomegranate Tbf they were a kid, what do you expect?
From a small Indian city, eating using hands, I came to Cambridge university, formal dinners in University's colleges are a common thing here. I remember going through a very very good course on the internet to learn how to eat. She gave the tip BMW, bread, meal and water/wine from the left to right. I never have made a mistake. My eating etiquettes are spot on. I still use my hands to eat at home.
What about Pizza and Chips? It would be quite weird to use a fork and knife to eat those
@@mastershooter64Pizza and chips/crisps are rarely served during a formal dinner. Pizza is commonly eaten with a knife and fork though in some countries.
I think it should be the same for a person that grew up with more Western European ettiquette rules, when they would visit your city in India. They would have to learn how the eating rules are there. How to eat properly with their hands. It's really just a different style, but ettiquete (rules of behaviour) regardless!
@@mastershooter64 Not really, in my opinion. I have a friend who grew up eating pizza with a fork and knife at home. If I'm eating in a pizza restaurant, I would also eat with knife and fork.
I love how the instructor mentioned that good manners are about being respectful of others, about how they feel and their personal space. It's true that today most people aren't aware of that at all.
Even if they dont respect yours??
@@sakuraesther6309 Yep. Don't stoop down to others levels. If someone is very intolerable though, stay away from them. But do not speak ill because that will reflect to others what you actually see in yourself.
@@sakuraesther6309 Absolutely! The height of poor manners is pointing out someone else's bad manners. 🙂 Unfortunately, many these days take it as an opportunity to criticize or drop to an even lower level.
@@stuffmewithpasta756 being a doormat is not the answer... do no harm but take no bs
@@stuffmewithpasta756yes! I like to think if it like Uncle Iroh from Avatar the Last Airbender. No matter how rude anyone is to him, he keeps his composure and politely stands his ground.
*Fun fact:* While Kelsey's bread/drink memory rule is a nice trick, it's actually the opposite in Sweden, so if you're ever invited to the Nobel banquet you need to unlearn that. Also don't clink glasses. *Ever!* When you toast at informal dinners in Sweden you raise your glasses, look around the table and say "Skål". At formal dinners there's a whole procedure of nodding at people (For men: left, right, opposite. For women: right, left, opposite.) before drinking, and then you nod at everyone in the opposite way before lowering your glass.
Yesss when we toast we say skål and we pronounce it as scole
Wow
Me, an American teenager screenshotting this just in case:
I know, there's so many different styles of dining, with Continental styles and American, and with Continental the rules change based on which country you might be in. it's very confusing.
@@Yourfriendlysuburbanstoner me an Indian teenager screenshotting this :
I’m not sure how you made manners INTENSE, but I was on the edge of my seat the whole time - awesome video!
Hahaha THANK YOU @Louis!!!
@@MichelleKhare @Louis 💀
jk all love ❤️ you're a massive inspiration
I hooe you had your back straight and your hands on your knees! 😉😉
yea
The teacher uses WAY TOO MANY hand gestures !! Pretentiousness and causing anxiety over tableware; Massive point reduction … grade C-
They are very relevant skills. In graduate school I found myself eating dinner at a Supreme Court justices house. His wife was VERY into proper etiquette at the dinner table. So I learned and was SO thankful I did my research!
"Are you ready for dessert? Do you still have room in your belly?"
Michelle and the others who barely ate anything: *YES*
They didn't even eat the food!
with every bite of food, the odds of damaging the priceless china went up - better to eat less! 😆
her: etiquette is about putting others at ease
also her: this is my wedding's china, you break you pay.
Well.. Etiquettes for that will be to not break anyone's dishes let alone wedding China so yeah Lmao.
I consider myself a barbarian yet if someone break my ordinary china I will do the same
@Cath Palug, 😂🤔😶 I'm sorry for laughing
😂
exactly what i was thinknig
🙌🏻🧐❤️ It was an HONOR learning how to be Fancy with you Michelle! Thank u for having me!
*Crys in peasant for getting a B* lol
Cool
lmao Chris you got a humor
LMAO
They sort of teach this in private school.
Chris you were already a natural at this... I think your score should have been higher but it is etiquette to make ladies feel better so they got higher scores lols.
Watching Michelle overcoming these crazy challenges over the years has been so amazing to watch
simp
Fake verified
Greetings from Edmonton City, Canada. Your Username is literally Fart ;) i chuckled because that is the most un-etiquette concept. imagine farting at a fancy dinner!
I'm loving that a channel named Fart is interested in learning etiquette 😆
The handshake part reminded me of my typing teacher in middle school. He was in business, and we had to shake his hand the professional way before entering the classroom. If we did it wrong, we had to go to the back of the line and do it again.
Our life skills teachers in high school were so strict. This was in the 80s. My lowest grades were in Typing and sewing.
It's super ironic that the etiquette instructor's last name is Gaché, which means "spoiled" (like food that's gone bad) in French
XD
can be a spoiled brat in Philippines as well.. one who expects to have anything he/she wanted.. which most of the time, they get as they wish for real. 😁
Lol! Because she's spoiled.
Etiquette means Étiquette in French it has nothing to do with spoiled
Shortly after HS graduation, some friends and I were invited to a Navy Ball by a friend in the military. My grandmother was big into etiquette and dining. So when the table setting was a full setting I was not thrown at all. But everyone, my friends and the military students at my table were lost.
My friends knew just to grab whatever utensil I did because I warned them of it. It was amusing because the commander stopped by the table to greet us since we were off base guests and I could see that he was amused that no one at the table would touch anything unless I did it first. 😂
I can say thats some flex. Respect too. Great job! I should memorize this too
Military Dinner - you do not touch your port (after dinner drink) until the highest ranking person/host has toasted to the queen - then you wait for all the other toasts to finish before you can drink casually
@@thisismyname3328 i thought that goes for most formal dinners to show some respect
Ditto on our junior-senior trip, which was a cruise with full dinner service every night! I was a band nerd and certainly had friends, but by the second night the cheerleaders wanted to sit at our table. lol
@@leapintothewild Mhmm....
Michelle - you've actually highlighted a very interesting aspect of etiquette in your videos and I thank you for it. The 'traditions' of many cultural forms of etiquette are HUGE indicators of class when you are with other people. While it may not matter to some folks whether you bow at the right moment or know which side to start using utensils from, to others it is a very obvious indicator of whether you grew up with wealth. If you don't have it, you either grew up poor and aren't aware of it, are new money and never learned it, or your wealthy family didn't care enough to teach it to you - which are important cues for others that want to know.
My mother's family was hyper aware of dining and serving etiquette due to high end restaurant work, but they did not grow up with the money that my father's family did and with that came a whole bunch of different rules of behavior. My grandmother made sure all of her grandchildren were properly instructed on these types of cultural indicators as a matter of maintaining 'class appearances' even though our families no longer lived within that world of wealth. While many etiquette schools will argue that teaching 'basic manners' is just the right thing to do in a polite society (which I respect completely), it nonetheless does function as a class indicator and is fascinating in that respect - speaking as someone who has to chameleon their way through social events occasionally.
This!!!!
Most important point!
It’s slightly gate keeping isn’t it?
It would be nice to see etiquette as an elective of sorts. I learned through similar circumstances, and I always thought if it was more widely accessible it would be seen as fairly positive. Treating each other as equals, being civil, showing respect for others and oneself, all those things are helpful not only at a business dinner but in general too. Obviously, depending on time and place but still something I think younger generations would be able to give a more inclusive meaning to. 🤷🏻♀️
@@yothiga What is?
In the south, we call this Charm School. I attended at 14 and learned to sit, stand, enter and exit a vehicle, which piece of silverware to use when, even how to properly introduce the President to the Queen (the method depends on whether you're American or British!). That, along with a semester of golf in college, put me in good stead when I entered business! Honestly, none of it really matters, but her message is absolutely correct: good manners give you confidence, and they ensure you're paying attention to the comfort of others. Many of us could use Charm School in the past few years!
2:12
"It's nice to meet you 😊"
"You too ☺"
"..."
"gOoDbYE"
I loved the "do you want your dress zipped all the way in the back" part, such a gentle way of calling someone out like maybe they like it partly unzipped 🤷♀️🤣
I mean, you never know if it is a fashion statement 😂
No, you would speak very discreetly to a lady.
The polite thing is to say nothing and not embarass them lol.
@chamomile8170 yeah let someone else embarrass them, not our problem right?
@@JasmineTea127Then they will be mortified when they undress at the end of the day and realize how exposed they were snd nobody told them.
"Manners are designed to put everyone at ease."
*literally are a strict formula for every tiniest gesture to adhere to*
I do think an important lesson this provides is on mindfulness, because she had a really good point about people often times not respecting others' personal space and it's good to keep in mind habits you have that can be actively intrusive.
But the side the bread plate is on? Not drinking first if you're the subject of a toast? Your dress zipper accidentally being a bit down? Your back not being allowed to touch the back of a chair (dafuq is the back of the chair there for, then??). These are things that are only really offensive due to not adhering to an expectation, rather than being any sort of intrusive or aggressive. Imo, if you see someone leaning back in a chair and your first thought is they're uninterested, that says way more about you. I've seen some people who lean back because of disinterest, but have also seen plenty who lean back because they're pensive and processing what they're being told. It doesn't represent disengagement, it represents receptiveness.
I think there's a certain point where you're being so self aware that you become self-centered, and are more concerned about your current state than the situation and people around you. It's a balancing act, being mindful of your bearing on a situation but also reserving brainspace for organic communication, observation, and empathy. High-class "manners" like this are too far to one extreme methinks.
That’s why it’s to put everyone at ease I believe. If everyone is on one accord and knows how to properly use certain utensils and how to carry themselves it makes for a real comfortable environment, because you know what to expect. Also eating with people who don’t have table manner makes some feel very uneasy. It’s a matter of perspective.
@@loria287 perhaps, but most people I know who have been in these scenarios (mind you, I came from one of those families that did this shit) almost always end up being the one who are emotionally falling apart from the pressure of perfection and keeping up appearances.
Not exactly some uncommon phenomena I don't think.
When her dad moved that bowl to the right, everyone did the same to make him feel better.
But if he himself had to make others feel better, he would need to never move the bowl.
That's how etiquettes work...
@@briargray2355 that’s because there’s a fine line between having proper etiquette and obsessing over it. Like she said during the dining portion about how the other men switched plates for the sake of Kelsey’s dad. If they obsessed over etiquette they would’ve all looked at him like a moron instead they all went along with what he did because he didn’t know in order to not make him feel like he’s sticking out
If Michelle ever stops doing TH-cam, she can literally do anything ever. She has trained to do every job and is somehow pretty good at everything lol
A real life barbie
Yeah but she has no real work experience 😄
Ok this video is great love it love everything about it.
@3:49 when he sat with better poster he actually looks tense and doesn't want to be there vs when he sat more relaxed he looked approachable.
I sit with my legs crossed
Dope story about the businessmen switching plates for her dad. Great tip about b and d. My mom made me study Emily Post and Amy Vanderbilt when I became a teen. So many rules and guidelines to remember. It truly is a lost art, even amongst the upper echelon.
My grandmother had to go through finishing school in the early 1910s and put all of us through the training, she made it fun though! It all was a game and I am so grateful that she taught us everything she knew. Her first lesson was to be polite and afford everyone you met the same respect you expected to receive, but take no shit. She was a true lady lol.
That sounds fun! May I ask in what way she made the etiquette training seem like a game?
@capuchinosofia4771
For poise, my sister and I had to walk to the end of the hall and back with a book on the head and a teacup of water properly held in our hand, she wanted us to glide when we walked, not stomp. Made everything a bit of a competition, but for fun and not prizes or one upping each other.
@@leolapennington264 soo, did that help? I feel like I walk wrong and have been wanting to try that. I'm good with etiquettes I'll say, eating, talking, dressing etc except for walking. I feel like I'm 'heavy footed' if that's even a word 😅
I really needed this video, I have been doing EVERYTHING wrong lol.
who knew there's a proper way to eat soup 😅 thank u for watching!!
pigmi?! Love your videos!
@@MichelleKhare Michelle I really love your content but notice you often only respond to other verified creators with a large following, would be nice for you to respond to your other viewers when you have time. We love and support you too❤️
And that's okay!
The things here are stupid and not about living.
U can get it right, but u gotta focus
I love seeing the diverse challenges lately. Having some non-athletic challenges between the physical ones is really cool to see!
I loved finishing school, it did me so good and I use my etiquette to this day. Opened so many business doors for me and made me so much money. People feel comfortable around me and very well respected. In fact, somehow they feel they can trust me too, which I honor of course. I love etiquette. I feel good around people who know how to carry themselves.
i grew up in an insanely etiquette strict home but
everyone in my family feared my grandma who used to tie wooden desks to our backs in order to good posture and it’s quite a challenge to dine with her at the same table
Thanks for having me!
I saw that white dress, white shoes👟, white smile and I thought where can I see more, Now I know.
Knew it was u
This is so nostalgic for me. My mother had me in ettiquette school for 5 years when I was younger. We even had written exams and everything😭.
wtf 💀💀
That sounds good, I wanted to have some when I was a teenager but my parents aren't instructed in it. I got in many embarrassing stuff in school (it was a rich kid school - I wasn't one of them despite beeing in the same space -) because they all knew, but I didn't so I mostly looked like an idiot. Sometimes kids almost a decade youger would come and slip tips to me (as young as 4 or 5 years 'cause I have a soft spot for kids and used to help them in their play pretend endeavors and they helped me back in politeness). The tips where things like: there is a proper way to raise a question, to sit, to sneeze and most things. Young kids are very honest in teaching and don't try to embarrass you, older ones not so much.
Wow...five years? Did you have to take notes? Did you have a textbook? I had "lady lessons" at home with my grandmother. I learned a lot from her, but I've always wanted to know more.
I would fail being a lefty XD
You poor thing.
“Everything was fine until this was WEDDING CHINA” meant everything to me! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
“queen of england” 4:47
what queen 💀
Lol she SAT with good posture
I am very grateful that my Danish grandmother taught me all this as a child. Even with little money, we always attached great importance to etiquette. That gave me a sense of security later on, even at the biggest diplomatic events.
This video was not long enough! I love that you invited your friends to join. I love Kelsey too, and you can tell she has experience popping open a bottle of champagne lol. The Princess Diaries is one of my favorite movies, and this reminded me of it so much. Especially the dining portion. The lady who taught the class was so nice even though you messed some things up
omg, the lady is so likable & relatable, while knowing all the pitfalls one can potentially take. she is joy & mastery combined
I love this etiquette thing because it makes my mental health better and makes SO MUCH MORE AWARE
man im glad i didn’t grow up with parents that care about manners. people criticize them but being more free as a child honestly makes the biggest difference as a teen now. i grew up burping loudly at the table, eating with my hands/tortillas, and being hella vulgar at home and it worked out very well for me. obviously i don’t do it in public but i enjoyed my childhood
I love all etiquette related stuff and finishing schools! I'm happy to hear they are still a thing :) love the elegance, and it's fun too 😄
This is the Good Challenge kind of etiquette!!! Keep up you're great challenges Michelle 👍👍👍
I learned all of these etiquette rules from my grandma, to the point I do it unconsciously.
I do love that they show the 'putting other at ease' and not embarrassing people who don't know!
I'm so glad, great episode! :DDDD
I remember when I took a Business Etiquette Dinner workshop in college and it was a lot of fun!!! One trick that I taught my brother is when we are eating or finished eating, the way you place your fork and knife in certain positions will signal the servers what you want done to your plate. It is very interesting.
It is, it's very important how you position your utensils on the plate. It's kind of a silent feedback to the chef and also to the servers, it's easier for them to read your opinion on the entire setting. It's really fun, I have been doing this for years so it's kind of muscle memory to always know what to do
I love how you try everything like there’s no limit. You got this girl!!!
Ive been reading a lot of fantasy historical manhwa(romance and more on the reincarnation revenge etc.) and it really inspire me to learn more about etiquettes the this vid shows up well what a great timing ig
Wow, Kelsey's story about her father really changed my perspective about the ettiquete and manner.
The fact that they all changed their plates for one person is really great. Still, it must be very embarrassing for him 😆
12:55 this is so very true! People not educated in etiquette or manners don't have the self awareness, just that alone can save you. Someone's self-space must always be respected. Because many people are not aware of this, I often have to establish mine because this behavior is not commonly known anymore.
They do have the self-awareness, they just don't have unhealthy hyper-awareness.
I had etiquette classes at my English boarding school. They were a lot milder than this but we were still prepared for a formal dinner party.
Its giving: “to be a princess is to know which spoon to use, to be a princess is a thousand pairs of shoes, to retain a regal gait leave the parsley on your plate, stay quiet, detached and yet amused, to be a princess is to never be confused (doo doo doo doo do doo doo doo) do a plié and never fall, dont ever stray from protocol all through the day theres just one way you must behave” if u get that reference, we’re besties now 😌
This is truly a forgotten art. There’s nothing snobby about having proper etiquette and encouraging others to have it too. It’s about having respect for where you are, who you are with, and most importantly who you are yourself. Nobody likes someone who is a slob, or someone who can never decompress every once in a while.
Yeah stop it this is ridiculous
Or we can stop taking life seriously 24/7/365 and act according to a given situation while still being yourself.
There's a time and place for extreme formality.
@@mysticmoth1111 yep nobody is arguing that don’t know why you replied tbh
The china moment was akin to "Welcome to parenting class. Now hold this. Careful, do not drop it. It contains a real baby".
So awkward and unnecessary, can’t fake class.
Trying to learn how to be in a marching band could be really cool!
you’d have to learn to play the Instrument plus how to March properly and memorize drill, it’s a lot harder than it looks and I think it could be a cool video
Ha. Yes. She could do a series about "going back to school" and do some school challenges starting with marching band, football, or some kind of team sport & explore so of the challenges teen face.
See this is why I don't like Ultra proper etiquette. Just be courteous and respectful to others. If anybody's going to make a big deal about you choosing the wrong utensil, then maybe trying to tell them that you don't really care about this sort of thing in a nice way.
I mostly agree, but from my understanding no one ever makes a big deal about trivial things like that, that's just for movies. Like the story with the bread plate, it's not something you mention, it's just something people go along with (especially if they know that you are not as familiar with the etiquette).
@@mothma_am mainly the people who judge are the ones who take the classes from a young age and have grown up on that world. In my experience i do see when people dont have "proper" etiquette but never really say anything to their faces
i agree somewhat... i think in most scenarios the average american wouldn't use these techniques too much. however, it's good to learn basic proper etiquette in case you get invited to a fancy event or something, because it shows that you respect the people you're with and it can gain you respect also. and even though it may seem a bit overkill, i think the main point is to teach discipline. it's kinda the same thing with being on a drill team or in a marching band. i don't know exactly what good playing a tuba or tossing a rifle in the air is going to do for you in life, but the patience, presence, posture, time management, discipline, self-awareness, and respect of authority you learn will take you very far
iirc it's more of so the ppl who knows ultra proper etiquette looks at ppls etiquette and base their social/financial status off of that. Other than that yeah i deffo agree with u
Nobody cares how you sit or stand unless your putting your feet up at a high class wedding just act normal
Etiquette.... the French word for "being entirely physically uncomfortable for the sake of 'looking good.'" 😂😂
5:25 Did bro just say”What the sigma?” 😂😂
I find it astounding that schools like this still exist...
Celebrities use them!
Me too.
I wanna learn it for that little girl in my heart but I'm not even a girl~
Etiquette classes are becoming popular with millennial business professionals.
@@basilbat273 as an actual little girl let me tell you no little girl needs this. do it for yourself if it makes you happy.
It'd be cool to go to Racing School, or like Training like a pro drag racer. Something along those lines. There was a little bit of it during the Police Academy, but it'd be cool to see it more indepth.
Also with Porshe's first female GT racer in the Middle East there'd be nice tie in to current events.
Yeeeesss
She could collaborate with the Cleetus McFarland channel. He has his own speedway and he holds oval stock car races, drift events, as well as burn out competitions and he has set records for drag racing. He could have her running an 8 second quarter mile in one day.
I don't think there's any school for drag racing. It's just holding your car straight and shifting at the right point after all. There's schools for any other kind of racing though.
@@jsplit9716 I don't know about schools, but there are people who teach and there are different licenses based on how fast you run a quarter mile. No, drag racing isn't just about shifting and holding the car straight. Watching the Cleetus channel, you can see how they have to steer to compensate for what the car does and track conditions. They explain all the issues they run into. Staging can be complex, especially for a higher level car. The burnout is done a certain way and then they roll up to the first beams and set a trans brake and get the engine on a 2 step so the turbos build boost, then hit the bump button on the steering wheel to get into the second beams. Breaking the second set starts the count down of lights. At the end of the track a parachute (sometimes 2) has to be pulled and then gathered up afterward. There are different types of drag races....some have a bracket or goal time such as 8.5 seconds. If you go faster, your time doesn't count, so you want to stay closer than your opponents. Like many topics she covers, it seems simple and can be for a mild car at slow times, but the advanced/pro races are quite complex. There is plenty for her to make a video and even in a one day shoot, there would be more details than the etiquette video. I thought this one was lacking/short compared to her other videos.
Wait what kind of racing do you mean? Because she should totally do drag!
Sitting like a stiff dog at attention, with perfect posture is super off putting - it’s quite literally, the antithesis of being relaxed/comfortable. Relaxed, comfortable people are affable and comfortable to be around.
I agree. Especially the position males are suppose to sit in, really looks like a dog waiting for a treat and is so offputting... Not having them spread their legs: fine, but sitting with a super staight back and not being allowed to put their hands anywhere but on the knees, it's ridiculous and not something anyone does outside of royal circles.
I guess super rich people don't want to be relaxed
I agree. And the way the guy sits at 3:51 actually gives me the impression that he wants to leave very soon, that is how I would interpret it if I saw it in real life. They dont sit like they have "settled"
Yeah I was gonna say, that "proper sitting posture" doesn't signal "paying attention" to me, it signals "they're too focused on their posture to listen to anything I'm saying"
Proper sitting should be chill your arms on the rests because their supposed to be!
To me, it's kind of revealing that after being taught all of these strict rules which are supposed to govern our behaviour in every setting, the "grades" that Lisa gave were more-or-less arbitrary.
I really like how she mentioned that a person is judged within the first 7 seconds of meeting his or her acquaintance … just like TH-cam ads.
It’s very true. It happens in job interviews too. Non-verbal communication is everything.
Michelle knows how to be etiquette, fight blindfolded, rock climb, and take down a burning fire. This woman is prepared for anything.
I used to watch your channel so much. Life has been so hectic and I found it again. I remember being blown away by your courage to try new things when I first watched. I’m so glad to be here again.
Every part of etiquette clashes with every aspect of my social anxiety!
7:50 This was very refreshing to hear. Yes! The manner and etiquettes exist to put the others in comfort, not to enforce your way onto them.
I am the epitome of why the hell do we need this. And I am here to say that the attitude has prevailed. I don't know why we are trying to changes ourselves. It is okay to sneeze in the napkin and okay to use your elbow. It is okay to drink after somebody thanked you and okay to wait. I hate it that their are so many ways to be perfect but these ways are not taught when we are growing up. This means that the perfect we are trying to learn is a perfect of some dream society that we conjure in our head. The queen and the Princess has to sit in a certain pose? Why? Just to show that they are confident? But we know they are. I don't know. This is frustrating
I love how at the meeting the other people at the table switched their bread plates to be respectful towards her dad and not to humiliate him. I just thinks that so sweet💕
Also I really like the instructor she reminds of that strict,but caring great aunt that you love and are scared of at the same time.
I've learned in the US that firm, eye contact, inner thumb touching handshake is good manners, but in other countries it's like giving a cat call.
Well that's just because etiquette it's cultural. Most people learn the one from their country, but if you are someone who travels a lot for work (or anything formal), you'll have to learn basic etiquette from the major cultures. It's just good manners.
I would love to see Michelle try training like a concert pianist. It's quite a regime.
for anyone who doesnt know, etiquette means :" the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.". I Just LOVE the way Michelle is soo brave at everything!!!
They were like three Musketeers in this & laughing like kids on each, i’ve been taught etiquette and I wouldn’t have laughed at all around such a expert 😊 but i loved how fun you guys had 😁
Honestly Michelle and Kelsey's duo is so underrated and fun! Watching em since buzzfeed. Also Michelle's energy is so wholesome and calming. I love watching you take on such challenges
What I love about you and your videos is that you are so sweet, awesome, gorgeous, fun, and so much more. I am almost 15 and you inspire me to grow up with a healthy lifestyle and you obviously show that woman can do pretty much everything. Thank you for inspiring me to be a better and healthy person. I’m so glad I found your channel
I am in love with your videos! you literally motivate me alot with trying new things and trying to achieve things that I have never tried before! thank you so much for taking your time to create these awesome videos. All the love and support from Indonesia
I prefer the balkan etiquette, relaxed, friendly and familiy way ! Its more natural and u dont have to overthink everything and still be happy and not be judged
I wish etiquette was a mandatory class in American public schools, and taught exactly the same way this lady does. Maybe then all the boys who supposedly (according to their female friends) liked me would have simply introduced themselves to me and asked me out. Granted, I still would’ve said “no,” because I only date people Who I actually have romantic feelings for, and that only happens when I already know and like the person but it would’ve made me feel much more respected and made me respect them in turn.
@8:05 it's designed to put others at ease. @8:35 you break it you buy it, so good luck.
Literally 30 seconds later....
After I heard this on this instagram live I was so excited to see this video! Chris and Kelsey was such a great addition, this was definitely worth the wait!
When she said it was her wedding china, I suddenly got flashbacks about my mom's own collection and how dead I was going to be if anything happened to it.
12:05 he just ask is this squid game hahah I was laugh to hard it hurt
I just noticed that she laughed too much and that lady was so disappointed 😂😂😂😂
Me too. She has no class.
She needs to enroll in this etiquette school to learn some manners.
I do recall some of the dining etiquette from my home economics class my senior year of High School. This just refreshed my memory, thank you!!!!! Great job Michelle!!!!!!
Just a reminder for all, that the American (high society) way
is not the same as the ‘European way’ (which may only be the western European way…).
These are different from elsewhere too.
Do review before going to whichever location...
Take care 😇
I'm so glad etiquette isn't like this any more. It feels so fake and uptight when you do it like this. I think people are way more interesting when they don't have to watch out to do anything wrong. And don't get me wrong, you can still be polite and don't eat like a pig and everything but just a little bit more relaxed is way better.
Etiquette is still like this today, maybe you just don’t follow etiquette
@@alexdh5272 yeah, OK Karen
@@alexdh5272 i assure you the majority of society does not eat like this. We have way more important things to worry about then a bread plate
@@arrow2589 I don't eat like that either.. But I know I don't follow etiquette
idk I think its kinda cool. Its not a bad thing to keep some cultural traditions close.
The fact that she seems so much more confident in every video . Show how much shes realy growing as a creator and person .i love her videos so much keep up the great work 💕
In Germany, actually, one of the first instructors of good manners was a man called Freiherr von Knigge. The problem was, that, with the industrial revolution, many people who did not have the upper class upbringing became rich. But they were often regarded as inferior by ancient rich families because they did not know how to behave properly and often felt isolated on the parties. To help them to adapt and to make more friends and to feel less isolated, Freiherr von Knigge wrote a book about suitable manners. It became extremely popular, and the funny thing was that even the ancient rich families used it to educate their children to behave properly. The lady who instructed you reminded me a lot on that Freiherr von Knigge because what she wanted to do was to help people to fit in the upper class society even if they were not born into it. Thanks for showing us your training.
9:42 Same, I would be nervous to clink it
Yes!!! Now this is a challenge I would LOVE to do! But, I think the struggle would be REAL! I don’t think I’m very lady like😅
Haha same!
Had fun with this video!
My mom taught my sister and me the basics of this stuff when we were very young (late 1950's; Emily Post, anyone?) Pleased to see that it stuck, but I wanted to learn more about the place setting and all those glasses. IIRC, the shape is important as well as position in the arrangement.
You are so determined to overcome these hard obstacles with no experience. Keep up the great work and love your content! For your next challenge, you can train like a soccer player. Being in a traveling team is quite hard but there is A LOT of skill involved. Totally reccomend.
Love how they started out of the gate! Would love to see a part 2 with more dining etiquette.
I have watch Princess Diaries 75 times and it still does not get boring
I love how they were actually super nice and sweet and tried not to break anything especially after knowing it was a wedding china ❤️❤️❤️
It's interesting to see how this differs by country. In my country (UK, specifically England), its customary to ALWAYS smooth your skirt down when you sit down - I remember my mum telling me off multiple times when I was younger. The way that we hold cutlery and glasses is also different - the pinky finger goes around the stem of the glass while the rest of your hand grips the bowl. Elbows never leaning on the table was also something I was told off a lot for when I was younger
Interesting to hear! I was taught (living in Germany) to never grip a glass with a stem on the top, you are supposed to hold it only on the stem. Everything comes of as uneducated or to drunk to hold a glass properly
@@davielawrence3773 here in America, and I'm also from Germany and have lived in Europe, it is the same that you hold the stem, but with flutes, we rest our forefinger just below the cup. normally they're much heavier due to the crystal and quality vs. a wine glass. if you have any part of your hand on the cup portion, it warms the drink and smudges the glass.
I am American and currently live in America but have lived in several countries. From what I was taught in etiquette school what you stated was accurate. Although certain glasses require different handling.
Maybe I'm odd, but I've always found etiquette to be directly counterproductive. I don't think the goal was ever to "make people feel at ease" (and if it was, giving people countless minor rules to constantly keep track of is an awful way of doing it), I think it was about conformity. People prefer the world they inhabit to be predictable, so they try to make people fit one mold and follow one set of procedures. It's also mildly ableist in that it imposes the same standards on people regardless of the accommodations they need (e.g., posture for people with back problems, conversational rules for people with social anxiety/autism/ADHD/etc.).
I know none of it is meant to be hard and fast, but I think when evaluating our behavior, we should be more concerned with how we make others feel than how closely we match an arbitrary set of rules.
Yeah the posture one is physically impossible, kinda lost my smile for a second while watching but the rest was fun
My mother told me that keeping attention to your posture is to simply stand more upright and feel a little more confident and for most people it works and at big dinner tables, rules like "keep your elbows off the table" are simply to not bother the person next to you and so that everyone has their appropriate amount of space. And it all depends on the other guests, just like she said it is actually about comfort. But in modern days and with various different situations we often don't need most of those etiquette rules. I just think it is important to know them and know why and when you need them, just in case 🤷🏻♀️. But that is just my take on this and maybe I got it wrong.
well said
Well, you mentioned it, people prefer their world to be predictable, in that way etiquette does put people at ease.
It's definitely ablisst and arguable classist too, but as someone with social anxiety I actually prefer more formal functions because I have hard coded rules I can follow.
(i.e. I'd feel more at ease at a wedding than a large college party.)
I think it's important to remember people who follow that ettiquiete have been doing it, and have known it for so long they aren't constantly monitoring yourself like you and countless others seem to make It out to be. It's like breathing? In a way.
Them: Time for dessert!
Also them: Has only taken 3 bites
Interestingly this video helps me to brush up my etiquette for an upcoming interview in a MNC without actually taking paid up physical classes for absolutely free 😅
Thank you Michelle❤
Lots of love from India 🇮🇳
This vid is so funny to me but also makes me get what ettiquete is about! The instructor is so easily likable and thats her trained skill! Woah!
“Goodness me, did you chip my china?” 🤣 I love her! 13:22
I love these challenge accepted episodes! Keep up the good work Michelle!!!!!
I also had the idea that you can try becoming a contortionist. There are so many great contortionists out there who I am sure would be willing to help and so many tutorials. I would love to see this and it would make me so happy to see you try this. I also think the contortion is so cool and would such a good challenge for you.
Michelle, your videos are really inspiring, and the multitude of skills you showcase that are generally considered „talent” show that anyone can really do anything if they actually try enough.
I have been checking most of your videos, and was thinking of a few additional Challenges for you to (hopefully) accept.
- Programming - Create something original. Whether it's a website, a mobile app or a PC program, make something original from scratch using any programming / scripting languages you want.
- Languages - Learn any language outside your comfort zone at a basic conversational level, and test it in the native country. If you were to choose Romanian or Estonian, I would feel really proud of that :D
- Dancing - Learn any kind of dance style (preferably with a partner, preferably with Garrett :D ) that you have never attempted before.
I hope you get to see this comment :D
Thank you for making such quality content, we are looking forward to more!
I didn't even realize that when the video started it made me go all tense and kept my back straight until it ended because I immediately slouched and sighed.