I unexpectedly lost my wife of 20 years four weeks ago last night. She was 52. Not liking this grief crap, not at all. Never had experience with real grief before. I'm reading, studying and watching video's to try and understand the process. Joined a weekly grief group. I'm ping ponging around the various stages that they talk about. I don't really have the luxury of breaking down, we have a special needs child and I have to keep a calm and consistent environment for him. While I'm busy I'm functional but when he's in school or asleep it does sneak up on me a bit. Kim was always told that she couldn't have kids so our son was the center of her universe, her miracle. If I don't give him as happy and normal a life as possible I wouldn't be surprised if she came down just to kick me where it counts. It does give me focus but also scares the crap out of me. I've never been a fearful person, always was an adrenaline junkie. But now I'm worried about getting hurt or sick because there is no backup to help care for our son or our pets. My closest family is a 16 hour drive away. I fell off of a 10' ladder onto our tile floor while changing light bulbs last year. Ended up on crutches for 6 weeks. I can't afford to have something like that happen now. Not a fan of this fear either. I stopped smoking on Christmas Eve, Kim died on January 5th. Talk about timing. I don't miss the smoke or nicotine, that kind of stuff doesn't get to me. I do very much miss taking the dog out with Kim and having a smoke and conversation. Going out to a restaurant and grabbing a smoke and more conversation on the way to the car. Grabbing a smoke and a chat before we went into a store. Haven't broken down and smoked, not going to since I'm the only caretaker for my son now. But any time one of those smoke/conversation moments pop up it sure puts a lump in my throat. I miss our conversations, nobody on this planet knew me the way that she did. She'd always giggle at my stupid Dad jokes, even if she'd heard them a dozen times before. She was interested in the same books, the same entertainment, mostly the same music (she gets a strike for the disco and the rap), the same world events. She'd always call me on my BS. She knew when I needed a hug and when I needed to be kicked in the rear. It's still hard to believe that this huge part of my life is over. All the plans and dreams that we had. All the things we were going to do together as old farts. I always thought that I was pretty independent, I didn't really need people, never had a problem spending time alone. Boy did that come back and bite me. Can't believe that I'm mourning conversations that we'll never have. We both got hooked on a book series called the Dresden Files when we first got together. The author pumps our a new book every year or so, we'd both read them and have some great conversations about them. He put out a new book over a year ago that had some major events take place that would completely change the series. I've impatiently waited for over a year to talk to her about it, I didn't want to spoil any of the surprises. Now we won't be having that conversation at all. I get mourning memories of things that we did together, never thought it would include things that we hadn't gotten around to doing yet.
I'm so sorry for your loss.....sounds like you have alot on your plate in addition to the grief, and I love that your exploring recovery tools and methods. Grab a spot on our calendar if you would like to speak with a grief coach to see if that may be helpful for you. We use a specialized program based in neuroscience that helps people recover....we would be glad to help you navigate this new terrain. team.griefsessionhelpchat.com/
Your story, your loss, is like mine. It's been 6 months and I am still in denial. I wake up in the morning only to find Jenny is not next to me. During the course of each day, I see something, or hear a song, or go food shopping and at times the memories bring me to tears. The people I have contact with know and are very patient with me. I have always been a loner. I could deal with that many years ago, before I met Jenny. Being a loner is different from living without the person who saved me.
@@C5B-jc1yj I wish that there was something that I could say that would help but we both know that nothing will help. I joined one of those weekly grief groups for people that have lost their spouses, I'm the youngest by at least a couple of decades but I have picked up some coping tips. I keep focused on our son and the day to day things that need to be handled. Nights still aren't fun but at least I get some sleep now, the first month was brutal. All the well wishers that would call or check in the first few weeks have gone back to normal lives now, that's easier for me but I still get a little miffed for her sake that it didn't seem to impact her family for more than a couple of weeks. But I guess had it happened to one of them I'd have gone back to my normal life pretty quickly. I'll be spreading her ashes next week while all the school kids are on spring break, none of her family is available to come. Not sure if it will help or hurt more but my son and I will go to her favorite place, where I proposed to her all those years ago, where we had many picnics over the years and spread her ashes. She'll like being around some of her favorite memories. It's a very peaceful place. I was always good with solitude. But there's a big difference between solitude and loneliness. Not sure if it's even called loneliness if it's just for one person, I can be around groups of people but it doesn't help. I hope you find some peace brother.
I hope it is getting easier for you.. I lost my partner about 2 months ago. He was only 51. It was a sudden and violent death. I cannot believe that I am going through this and talking about his death as he was a healthy and strong man.. This is nothing that I have experienced in my life and this is the hardest for sure. I cannot find a meaning of my life as of yet after he is gone. We did not have a child and I am completely alone. I hope time will heal us and give us strength to go on.
@@npenick66 l'm very sorry for your loss 💔. My husband died 4 months ago today 💔. Grief comes in waves, some of the waves are bigger than others. I'm glad you're going to grieve share classes. I started going last week when they started up . I really would like to go to one where people have only lost their spouses. Instead of such a wide range of losses. I know all deaths are hard. I've been through too many of them already. Losing your spouse is a lot different. Especially when you lived with that person for so many years. And you miss their presence daily. It makes it harder for you having a special needs child. You're a great dad, your wife would be very proud of you 💗.
I lost my mom 2 months & 10 days ago, I can’t understand it and i can’t accept it. Life keeps moving and doesn’t even let me process the fact that I lost her. I don’t know how to accept this loss I miss her smile and laughs I miss everything about her. I can’t wait to be with her again 😔
So sorry for the loss of your mom.....please know that it can and will get better as long as you find some tools and work at it. We are here to help in any way we can.
My partner of over 2 years passed away last March 17, 2024,,,I was beyond perplexed bcoz he was healthy never been sick but cardiac arrest did kill him instantly 😭😭😭😭
I lost my precious childhood dog about 3 months ago. I always feel like he is coming back and I still can't believe I won't create new memories with him I still cry or nearly cry everyday He was my best friend
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my dog in October. I’m devestated. I feel it’s getting worse. Not better. He was like my first child. I will never get another dog. The loss is horrible and I don’t want to sign up for it. Sending love to you
Perhaps, but there are negative and positive ways to feel and express the love for our loved ones that we have lost. This channel is focused on teaching people positive ways to move forward and honor and celebrate their loved ones.
It's been 3 months since I lost my dad passed miss him more than anything he was my best friend he was 93 so sick of everyone saying he lived a great life
Mom died in February. The bad feeling is different than it was in the beginning but it’s still really strong. Struggling to find meaning in life without her in it but I keep trying. She lived with us for the last 5 years. I’ve canceled all her accounts but I still get mail for her regularly. Going through the mail is really hard now because I don’t knows what triggers are waiting for me in each pile. This is the most painful loss I’ve ever experienced. I miss normalcy so much.
Things will never be the same, but that doesn't mean they will always be bad. What are you doing for your grief recovery? We would be glad to offer some resources. Grab a spot on our calendar: team.griefhelpchat.com/session
Right now, I’m only at month 2. Life has picked up and there is work to be done, children to take care of. I’m so sad though, thinking about all of the things that I won’t get to do with my dad, and they things that I wish I could reach out and talk to him about like we used to. The disbelief is the predominant feeling, and the only thing I really have is pictures and memories that keep me a little lifted.
It's been only 2 months.I'm in unimaginable pain..my world has just stopped. He was the love of my life I dont know how to move forward! I stopped going to therapy bec I dont think they understand the gravity and enormity of my loss
I'm so sorry. I felt the same way about counseling.....that is why I started my company. All of the coaches here have been through loss and understand how hard and how heavy it can be. Sending you love, courage and strength.
You have expressed exactly what I feel. I am stuck, going through the motions each day without any meaning. My sweet Jenny saved me and she brought unimaginable joy into my life. Now, I feel like a zombie...but also breaking down in tears without warning, sometimes in front of others when they ask how I'm doing.
@@C5B-jc1yj yes this pain is unbearable. I'm so sorry for your loss. All I can say I understand what you are going through. Take one day at a time. One moment at a time. We have to learn to live with this pain. Please be gentle with yourself bec we are bearing the unbearable, suffering the insufferable. Always know Jenny is looking down on you and always watching over you. Jenny is in your heart forever. ❤️
Loss my wife for almost 23 years just over a month ago. Die 6 days befor my birtday n our 19th wedding anniversary. The hardest thing I had to deal with in my life.
I’m so sorry for your loss. This will most likely be the hardest thing you will ever have to face but you can get through it and find a strength and perseverance you never knew you had. We are here to support you however we can. Sending love and strength!
I lost my mom 3 months ago in July. And then had to celebrate my 🎂 in September. Honestly, I celebrated it just to make her proud of me. She wouldn't want me to be sad. Grief is very hard but im sure we'll get through it. We're not the first nor the last ones to have lost our moms. I hope that things get better for you.
@@Seera-Kat Thank you. And I am sorry for your loss. I understand the pain you are going through! And yes, you are right; our Moms never want us to be sad. In fact, the very last thing that my Mom ever said to me was 'do not cry'...and I try not to! But I just can't help it! Thanks again for your kind words of encouragement!
I CAN become easier but the most important first step is for you to believe that IT CAN become easier. Then, find a person or program to help you learn how to move forward into health and healing from loss. Grab a spot on my calendar if you would like to learn more about how our programs might be able to help: team.griefhelpchat.com/call
I’m going thru all this deep dark grief while going thru C- PTSD & ADHD.. plus grieving the loss of mum. Plus menopause. No family friends support groups nothing. I moved to a one horse town. I’m so stuck scared alone confused and just want mum back.. so I can say goodbye. My dad and sister took mum away from me.. I believe they wanted her money. Coz they never came to help me care for. Only when the end came. I had to do the care when I knew I couldn’t do it anymore. 5 years in said I’d be there and I was sii I messed up . I had to do the work myself with mum. It’s a dark subject still
I agree that it is not a linear process.....we do move forward, some better than others. This channel is focused on providing tools for moving forward well.
It's been 7 months. It feels like a 7 month nightmare. There are expectations from my family and friends to heal and endure, but I know it will never happen. My purpose in life has been stolen from me.@@Graceforlivingafterloss
I lost my brother 6 months ago, but in third month it really hit in. Even those who have suffered from loss won't tell you what to expect. Also, I didn't practice self care. I just worked and worked and five months later I burned out. And took a time off work. It's hard to do it because I feel guilty over not going to work. Also, no support. One friend I just can't call every single day and grief counseling sessions are very sporadic.
Yeah part of what makes it so difficult is the fact that we don’t talk about it so things feel like blindsides. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, we have groups and other resources if you’re needing additional support. Sending you love and strength!
I'm so sorry for your loss. What have you done or are you currently doing for your grief recovery? One of our coaches is a widow and she would be glad to connect with you. You can email her directly at jeanell@graceforlivingafterloss.com.
I lost my live in partner 2 weeks ago. I feel like i wanna die also so i cud be with him soon. I dont know how live life without him & how to start all over again. 😭😭💜
I hate when people ask me where my partner is, And i have to tell him he died. first i told someone i was in the market and lost it in front of a bunch of strangers. my life changed over night!! i was in shock for a long time.
My dad passed this February. I was executor of will and had to also deal with selling house. Plus, it was my attorney boss who took care of the estate so I had to do all the work.I don't feel like i got to grieve much because thats alot of work. But I'm almost done with the estate stuff and I'm trying to take care of me now.
Yes there is so much work to do when we lose a loved one and the work of grief or grieving often gets pushed aside until some of the other things have been taken care of....I'm glad you're finding the time to turn the attention towards your healing.
Harder, with everyone moving past it and forgetting and it not being the hot story on social media anymore I find myself growing resentful. I know that's a personal thing and it isn't intentional or disrespectful I still feel so pent up and like I can't even talk about her anymore.
I just had my first anniversary yesterday without my husband 😿💔😿. Our son took me out on a date. I guess that's what you could call it. This Wednesday it will be 4 months ago that my husband died 💔. All the firsts holidays and remembrance days are very difficult getting through. It's usually the days leading up to those days that seem to be the hardest😢...
It is so hard….doing some thought work on how you lead up to those dates might be helpful for you so that you don’t dread them as much. Oftentimes it’s our dreading that is worse than the actual date. Grab a spot on my calendar if you’d like to talk through some strategies: team.griefhelpchat.com/call
This appeared in my feed today and I lost my husband exactly 3 months ago. He passed from aspiration pneumonia on January 21, 2024 and today is April 21, 2024. He died three weeks before our 40th wedding anniversary. Some days are actually good and others are horrible.
So sorry for the loss of your husband. Glad to hear you having good days mixed in with the hard days. Connect with us directly if you would like to learn about our recovery communities and programs: team.griefhelpchat.com/session
@@Simsane yes it's very tough my mum was only 68..she was unwell that day just some tummy pain and vomit noting I didn't think was serious..I went and got her shopping and when I got home I asked did she want me to ring a doctor 2 or three times but she refused..later that night she collapsed on her way to bed..I went downstairs and she couldn't breath..she even said she was dieing to me :( I called an ambulance and put her into recovery position..told her its gonna be ok and I love her..she then said..she wasn't at home..and then she was gone.. :( I blame myself for not calling a doctor that day now but I just thought it was an upset tummy..I was told later on an upset tummy and vomit in women can be signs of a silent heart attack which I never knew..so now I feel it s all My fault..life will never be the same she was an Amazing mum and I feel I let her down...but thank you for your kind words and im so sorry to hear of your own loss on the exact same day..love from Mark in dublin x
My mom died February of 2024 (this year). It is now July and I am still not getting past any of this. She died so quickly - she was dealing with beginning stages of dementia and was still mobile at home - then breaking her hip, finding out she had pancreatic cancer and was in hospice for a week before she died. Within 3 weeks she was gone. I hurt all over, can’t get back into any type of routine and most of my friends have ghosted me. I’m drowning.
I'm so sorry. Grief is a really hard thing, especially if you don't have the right tools or right kind of support. I would be glad to chat with you and point you in the direction of things that can help. Grab a spot on my calendar: kelli.griefhelpchat.com/call
I stopped going to therapy because I cried more after each visit even up to the next visit. I am moving forward with taking care of financing, yoga, very few friends but have 3 cats. Who are very supportive. No kids. My sister is my best source of understanding where I am at. The hardest thing is to start packing up my husbands things I find it difficult.
I can appreciate this view. Therapy did not help me at all through my grief after I lost my mother. Getting things done, trying to keep busy, keeping few friends are what just keeps me going. Although with great difficulty.
I had 2 grief counseling sessions, and I felt miserable after both of them. I am in the 3rd month after my husband passed away suddenly at age 49 . I'm still in shock. I know I am because I still have hope that when my phone goes off, it's him texting me. Deep down, I know it's not going to happen😢
Yes, whether we are grieving the loss of a loved one or the end of a relationship or season in our lives, grief is grief and its a hard thing to overcome. How are you doing now?
Oh wow, losing multiple people in such a short period of time makes it compound grief which can be even harder to recover from. How long ago were the losses?
I still feel very numb and have brain fog. I have only brief moments of reality…it’s been 5 months today since I lost my mom. I did gain weight during this time so I’ve decided to start to get back to my healthy eating as this could be why I feel so bad.
Yes, grief also affects us physically. It may or may not be from the weight gain, but grief itself affects us physically. Please reach out if you are wanting/needing any additional help or tools for your grief recovery. team.griefhelpchat.com/session
Yes everything is turned upside down and nothing seems to make sense. I want to encourage you that you can find your way and discover new meaning for your life and your future. Please reach out if you are wanting/needing help with your recovery. team.griefhelpchat.com/session
I woke up one day asking where's the sickening sadness gone, that was heavy this is still heavy I'm embracing being harmlessly crazy while I contemplate where to from here....not looking at the past at all... that got buried in the cemetery too
Take your time and contemplate your next course carefully. Many people make rash decisions and mistakes when they are in a place of hurting. Give yourself space and time to navigate this new terrain. Sending you love, courage, and strength for the journey ahead!
I lost my husband of almost 68 years ten months ago. I guess I'm better but I will never be great again. I keep fairly busy, yoga 3 times/wk, grief group once a week, bible study but the evenings are worse. Nobody to talk to.
I"m so sorry for your loss. Maybe don't focus on if you will ever feel great again, but focus on feeling a little better each and every day. That's a very attainable thing and before you know it, you just may find yourself feeling great. Sending you courage, love and strength for the journey.
I’m so sorry to hear about your girlfriend. There is healing available even though it will take time and tremendous effort on your part. We are here to help and know that you can and will find joy again. Please reach out if you would like to connect.
I find that doing meditation helps to ease the pain. I have to do it often. Its been 6 months since losing the most important relationship in my life and only easing the pain while time passes is helping me. There are many guided meditations on TH-cam . Love and luck to us all :)
This discussion is so theoretical. There really are no stages for grief. ‘Progress’ is not a straight path. And I wonder if this speaker has confronted loss and even then the significance of loss is so different for everyone.
The speaker has experienced tremendous loss and this is not meant to be a straight path of healing but rather a guide to help people know what they might expect in different phases. Part of what is so difficult about grief is that no one talks about the effects and it can make you feel alone and/or crazy. The video is meant to help.
Not trying to squeeze grief into stages....trying to give people an idea of what to expect and helpful tools based on the time after the loss. If this doesnt resonate or apply to you, you are certainly justified to not watch or comment. Wish you well in your grief recovery journey.
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I unexpectedly lost my wife of 20 years four weeks ago last night. She was 52. Not liking this grief crap, not at all. Never had experience with real grief before. I'm reading, studying and watching video's to try and understand the process. Joined a weekly grief group. I'm ping ponging around the various stages that they talk about. I don't really have the luxury of breaking down, we have a special needs child and I have to keep a calm and consistent environment for him. While I'm busy I'm functional but when he's in school or asleep it does sneak up on me a bit. Kim was always told that she couldn't have kids so our son was the center of her universe, her miracle. If I don't give him as happy and normal a life as possible I wouldn't be surprised if she came down just to kick me where it counts.
It does give me focus but also scares the crap out of me. I've never been a fearful person, always was an adrenaline junkie. But now I'm worried about getting hurt or sick because there is no backup to help care for our son or our pets. My closest family is a 16 hour drive away. I fell off of a 10' ladder onto our tile floor while changing light bulbs last year. Ended up on crutches for 6 weeks. I can't afford to have something like that happen now. Not a fan of this fear either.
I stopped smoking on Christmas Eve, Kim died on January 5th. Talk about timing. I don't miss the smoke or nicotine, that kind of stuff doesn't get to me. I do very much miss taking the dog out with Kim and having a smoke and conversation. Going out to a restaurant and grabbing a smoke and more conversation on the way to the car. Grabbing a smoke and a chat before we went into a store. Haven't broken down and smoked, not going to since I'm the only caretaker for my son now. But any time one of those smoke/conversation moments pop up it sure puts a lump in my throat.
I miss our conversations, nobody on this planet knew me the way that she did. She'd always giggle at my stupid Dad jokes, even if she'd heard them a dozen times before. She was interested in the same books, the same entertainment, mostly the same music (she gets a strike for the disco and the rap), the same world events. She'd always call me on my BS. She knew when I needed a hug and when I needed to be kicked in the rear. It's still hard to believe that this huge part of my life is over. All the plans and dreams that we had. All the things we were going to do together as old farts. I always thought that I was pretty independent, I didn't really need people, never had a problem spending time alone. Boy did that come back and bite me.
Can't believe that I'm mourning conversations that we'll never have. We both got hooked on a book series called the Dresden Files when we first got together. The author pumps our a new book every year or so, we'd both read them and have some great conversations about them. He put out a new book over a year ago that had some major events take place that would completely change the series. I've impatiently waited for over a year to talk to her about it, I didn't want to spoil any of the surprises. Now we won't be having that conversation at all. I get mourning memories of things that we did together, never thought it would include things that we hadn't gotten around to doing yet.
I'm so sorry for your loss.....sounds like you have alot on your plate in addition to the grief, and I love that your exploring recovery tools and methods. Grab a spot on our calendar if you would like to speak with a grief coach to see if that may be helpful for you. We use a specialized program based in neuroscience that helps people recover....we would be glad to help you navigate this new terrain. team.griefsessionhelpchat.com/
Your story, your loss, is like mine. It's been 6 months and I am still in denial. I wake up in the morning only to find Jenny is not next to me. During the course of each day, I see something, or hear a song, or go food shopping and at times the memories bring me to tears. The people I have contact with know and are very patient with me. I have always been a loner. I could deal with that many years ago, before I met Jenny. Being a loner is different from living without the person who saved me.
@@C5B-jc1yj I wish that there was something that I could say that would help but we both know that nothing will help. I joined one of those weekly grief groups for people that have lost their spouses, I'm the youngest by at least a couple of decades but I have picked up some coping tips. I keep focused on our son and the day to day things that need to be handled. Nights still aren't fun but at least I get some sleep now, the first month was brutal. All the well wishers that would call or check in the first few weeks have gone back to normal lives now, that's easier for me but I still get a little miffed for her sake that it didn't seem to impact her family for more than a couple of weeks. But I guess had it happened to one of them I'd have gone back to my normal life pretty quickly.
I'll be spreading her ashes next week while all the school kids are on spring break, none of her family is available to come. Not sure if it will help or hurt more but my son and I will go to her favorite place, where I proposed to her all those years ago, where we had many picnics over the years and spread her ashes. She'll like being around some of her favorite memories. It's a very peaceful place.
I was always good with solitude. But there's a big difference between solitude and loneliness. Not sure if it's even called loneliness if it's just for one person, I can be around groups of people but it doesn't help. I hope you find some peace brother.
I hope it is getting easier for you.. I lost my partner about 2 months ago. He was only 51. It was a sudden and violent death. I cannot believe that I am going through this and talking about his death as he was a healthy and strong man.. This is nothing that I have experienced in my life and this is the hardest for sure. I cannot find a meaning of my life as of yet after he is gone. We did not have a child and I am completely alone. I hope time will heal us and give us strength to go on.
@@npenick66 l'm very sorry for your loss 💔. My husband died 4 months ago today 💔. Grief comes in waves, some of the waves are bigger than others. I'm glad you're going to grieve share classes. I started going last week when they started up . I really would like to go to one where people have only lost their spouses. Instead of such a wide range of losses. I know all deaths are hard. I've been through too many of them already. Losing your spouse is a lot different. Especially when you lived with that person for so many years. And you miss their presence daily. It makes it harder for you having a special needs child. You're a great dad, your wife would be very proud of you 💗.
I lost my mom 2 months & 10 days ago, I can’t understand it and i can’t accept it. Life keeps moving and doesn’t even let me process the fact that I lost her. I don’t know how to accept this loss I miss her smile and laughs I miss everything about her. I can’t wait to be with her again 😔
So sorry for the loss of your mom.....please know that it can and will get better as long as you find some tools and work at it. We are here to help in any way we can.
My partner of over 2 years passed away last March 17, 2024,,,I was beyond perplexed bcoz he was healthy never been sick but cardiac arrest did kill him instantly 😭😭😭😭
Pray To our God he's waiting for you with love open arms 🙏🙌
I lost my precious childhood dog about 3 months ago. I always feel like he is coming back and I still can't believe I won't create new memories with him
I still cry or nearly cry everyday
He was my best friend
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my dog in October. I’m devestated. I feel it’s getting worse. Not better. He was like my first child. I will never get another dog. The loss is horrible and I don’t want to sign up for it. Sending love to you
Grief is the love we still feel for our loved one and it never goes away.
I agree, it is the love we once gave that has nowhere to go
Perhaps, but there are negative and positive ways to feel and express the love for our loved ones that we have lost. This channel is focused on teaching people positive ways to move forward and honor and celebrate their loved ones.
It's been 3 months since I lost my dad passed miss him more than anything he was my best friend he was 93 so sick of everyone saying he lived a great life
Mom died in February. The bad feeling is different than it was in the beginning but it’s still really strong. Struggling to find meaning in life without her in it but I keep trying. She lived with us for the last 5 years. I’ve canceled all her accounts but I still get mail for her regularly. Going through the mail is really hard now because I don’t knows what triggers are waiting for me in each pile. This is the most painful loss I’ve ever experienced. I miss normalcy so much.
Things will never be the same, but that doesn't mean they will always be bad. What are you doing for your grief recovery? We would be glad to offer some resources. Grab a spot on our calendar: team.griefhelpchat.com/session
I am going through the same thing. God love you.
@@lydiamoore142same
I lost my mother 6 months ago... Thank you for this, it helps a lot...
I am glad to be able to help.
I lost my dad and I was in shock and felt like I was getting past the new sting and rawness of it then my mom passed
Right now, I’m only at month 2. Life has picked up and there is work to be done, children to take care of. I’m so sad though, thinking about all of the things that I won’t get to do with my dad, and they things that I wish I could reach out and talk to him about like we used to. The disbelief is the predominant feeling, and the only thing I really have is pictures and memories that keep me a little lifted.
I think disbelief is still my most predominant emotion throughout each day.
It's been only 2 months.I'm in unimaginable pain..my world has just stopped. He was the love of my life
I dont know how to move forward! I stopped going to therapy bec I dont think they understand the gravity and enormity of my loss
I'm so sorry. I felt the same way about counseling.....that is why I started my company. All of the coaches here have been through loss and understand how hard and how heavy it can be. Sending you love, courage and strength.
You have expressed exactly what I feel. I am stuck, going through the motions each day without any meaning. My sweet Jenny saved me and she brought unimaginable joy into my life. Now, I feel like a zombie...but also breaking down in tears without warning, sometimes in front of others when they ask how I'm doing.
@@C5B-jc1yj yes this pain is unbearable. I'm so sorry for your loss. All I can say I understand what you are going through. Take one day at a time. One moment at a time. We have to learn to live with this pain. Please be gentle with yourself bec we are bearing the unbearable, suffering the insufferable. Always know Jenny is looking down on you and always watching over you. Jenny is in your heart forever. ❤️
I am going through the same thing. Very painful. Never sobbed so much in my life. We have to hang on and look to God for direction.
3.5 months after losing my dear bf. I feel like I'm getting more depressed at time goes on. It's so hard, i don't know how I'm still living
It is hard, but it can get better. Please reach out if you need help.
Loss my wife for almost 23 years just over a month ago. Die 6 days befor my birtday n our 19th wedding anniversary. The hardest thing I had to deal with in my life.
Same here my wife of 11 years past 3 and half months ago, she struggled so much with cancer and past right before a month before her 30th birthday.
@@edcrespo1722 sorry about your loss man. After 2 month n some days it got better. But I miss her really bad today.
I’m so sorry for your loss. This will most likely be the hardest thing you will ever have to face but you can get through it and find a strength and perseverance you never knew you had. We are here to support you however we can. Sending love and strength!
Today is my first birthaday since losing my beloved Mom four months ago. Over the months so far it never became easier...I wonder if it ever will!
I lost my mom 3 months ago in July. And then had to celebrate my 🎂 in September. Honestly, I celebrated it just to make her proud of me. She wouldn't want me to be sad. Grief is very hard but im sure we'll get through it. We're not the first nor the last ones to have lost our moms. I hope that things get better for you.
@@Seera-Kat Thank you. And I am sorry for your loss. I understand the pain you are going through! And yes, you are right; our Moms never want us to be sad. In fact, the very last thing that my Mom ever said to me was 'do not cry'...and I try not to! But I just can't help it! Thanks again for your kind words of encouragement!
I CAN become easier but the most important first step is for you to believe that IT CAN become easier. Then, find a person or program to help you learn how to move forward into health and healing from loss. Grab a spot on my calendar if you would like to learn more about how our programs might be able to help: team.griefhelpchat.com/call
Thanks for talking to men too.
I’m going thru all this deep dark grief while going thru C- PTSD & ADHD.. plus grieving the loss of mum. Plus menopause. No family friends support groups nothing.
I moved to a one horse town.
I’m so stuck scared alone confused and just want mum back.. so I can say goodbye. My dad and sister took mum away from me.. I believe they wanted her money. Coz they never came to help me care for. Only when the end came. I had to do the care when I knew I couldn’t do it anymore. 5 years in said I’d be there and I was sii I messed up . I had to do the work myself with mum. It’s a dark subject still
The myth of closure - there are no stages to grief, it’s not some linear process. You don’t move on from it, you just move forward.
I agree that it is not a linear process.....we do move forward, some better than others. This channel is focused on providing tools for moving forward well.
I am learning to live with it. I lost my partner of nines years March 6th, I found her and it is something no one should have to go through.
Oi@@Graceforlivingafterloss
After losing the most wonderful person in my life, when someone asks me how I am doing...I just fall apart.
I'm so sorry for your loss. How long has it been?
It's been 7 months. It feels like a 7 month nightmare. There are expectations from my family and friends to heal and endure, but I know it will never happen. My purpose in life has been stolen from me.@@Graceforlivingafterloss
I lost my brother 6 months ago, but in third month it really hit in. Even those who have suffered from loss won't tell you what to expect. Also, I didn't practice self care. I just worked and worked and five months later I burned out. And took a time off work. It's hard to do it because I feel guilty over not going to work. Also, no support. One friend I just can't call every single day and grief counseling sessions are very sporadic.
Yeah part of what makes it so difficult is the fact that we don’t talk about it so things feel like blindsides. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, we have groups and other resources if you’re needing additional support. Sending you love and strength!
I lost my wife of 28 years tragically 6 months ago. This has helped me. Again, thank you.
I'm glad you found it helpful, and I'm so sorry for your loss.
I lost my husband 4 months ago im so lost
Sorry for your loss. 😢
I'm so sorry for your loss. What have you done or are you currently doing for your grief recovery? One of our coaches is a widow and she would be glad to connect with you. You can email her directly at jeanell@graceforlivingafterloss.com.
Me too. 4 mos ago…. I’m so broken and lost.
I lost my live in partner 2 weeks ago. I feel like i wanna die also so i cud be with him soon. I dont know how live life without him & how to start all over again. 😭😭💜
I hate when people ask me where my partner is, And i have to tell him he died. first i told someone i was in the market and lost it in front of a bunch of strangers. my life changed over night!! i was in shock for a long time.
Grief can definitely hit you out of nowhere. I hope that you are progressing in your recovery. Please reach out if you need help.
My dad passed this February. I was executor of will and had to also deal with selling house. Plus, it was my attorney boss who took care of the estate so I had to do all the work.I don't feel like i got to grieve much because thats alot of work. But I'm almost done with the estate stuff and I'm trying to take care of me now.
Yes there is so much work to do when we lose a loved one and the work of grief or grieving often gets pushed aside until some of the other things have been taken care of....I'm glad you're finding the time to turn the attention towards your healing.
Thank you for these videos. They really help
I'm glad you find them helpful.
Thank you I’m at 6 weeks
I'm so sorry for your loss.....who did you lose?
Tomorrow marks four months since I lost my wife
I'm so sorry for your loss. How did the 4 month anniversary go? Are you finding the monthly anniversaries getting easier or harder as time goes on?
Harder, with everyone moving past it and forgetting and it not being the hot story on social media anymore I find myself growing resentful. I know that's a personal thing and it isn't intentional or disrespectful I still feel so pent up and like I can't even talk about her anymore.
This was very useful. Subbed and going to watch more.
I just had my first anniversary yesterday without my husband 😿💔😿. Our son took me out on a date. I guess that's what you could call it. This Wednesday it will be 4 months ago that my husband died 💔. All the firsts holidays and remembrance days are very difficult getting through. It's usually the days leading up to those days that seem to be the hardest😢...
It is so hard….doing some thought work on how you lead up to those dates might be helpful for you so that you don’t dread them as much. Oftentimes it’s our dreading that is worse than the actual date. Grab a spot on my calendar if you’d like to talk through some strategies: team.griefhelpchat.com/call
This appeared in my feed today and I lost my husband exactly 3 months ago. He passed from aspiration pneumonia on January 21, 2024 and today is April 21, 2024. He died three weeks before our 40th wedding anniversary. Some days are actually good and others are horrible.
So sorry for the loss of your husband. Glad to hear you having good days mixed in with the hard days. Connect with us directly if you would like to learn about our recovery communities and programs: team.griefhelpchat.com/session
I lost my mum the exact same day..the 21st of January..I to am struggling..love and prayers to your from Ireland :)
@@tekken278 I'm so sorry.😢. Hugs to you, my friend. Love and prayers to you as well.❤️🙏
@@Simsane yes it's very tough my mum was only 68..she was unwell that day just some tummy pain and vomit noting I didn't think was serious..I went and got her shopping and when I got home I asked did she want me to ring a doctor 2 or three times but she refused..later that night she collapsed on her way to bed..I went downstairs and she couldn't breath..she even said she was dieing to me :( I called an ambulance and put her into recovery position..told her its gonna be ok and I love her..she then said..she wasn't at home..and then she was gone.. :( I blame myself for not calling a doctor that day now but I just thought it was an upset tummy..I was told later on an upset tummy and vomit in women can be signs of a silent heart attack which I never knew..so now I feel it s all My fault..life will never be the same she was an Amazing mum and I feel I let her down...but thank you for your kind words and im so sorry to hear of your own loss on the exact same day..love from Mark in dublin x
Im a month in to giref, witness my wife's suffering through cancer, such a beautiful kind woman suffered so much
I’m so sorry for your loss. Hopefully you will find encouragement and tools for your recovery here.
My mom died February of 2024 (this year). It is now July and I am still not getting past any of this. She died so quickly - she was dealing with beginning stages of dementia and was still mobile at home - then breaking her hip, finding out she had pancreatic cancer and was in hospice for a week before she died. Within 3 weeks she was gone. I hurt all over, can’t get back into any type of routine and most of my friends have ghosted me. I’m drowning.
I'm so sorry. Grief is a really hard thing, especially if you don't have the right tools or right kind of support. I would be glad to chat with you and point you in the direction of things that can help. Grab a spot on my calendar: kelli.griefhelpchat.com/call
I stopped going to therapy because I cried more after each visit even up to the next visit. I am moving forward with taking care of financing, yoga, very few friends but have 3 cats. Who are very supportive. No kids. My sister is my best source of understanding where I am at. The hardest thing is to start packing up my husbands things I find it difficult.
I can appreciate this view. Therapy did not help me at all through my grief after I lost my mother. Getting things done, trying to keep busy, keeping few friends are what just keeps me going. Although with great difficulty.
I had 2 grief counseling sessions, and I felt miserable after both of them. I am in the 3rd month after my husband passed away suddenly at age 49 . I'm still in shock. I know I am because I still have hope that when my phone goes off, it's him texting me. Deep down, I know it's not going to happen😢
I’m grieving the loss of a relationship and just want the pain to go away. This is a fight.
Yes, whether we are grieving the loss of a loved one or the end of a relationship or season in our lives, grief is grief and its a hard thing to overcome. How are you doing now?
Thank you so much this helped me a lot.
Glad it helped!
Talk about grief I lost my wife and mother and son all in less than six months
Oh wow, losing multiple people in such a short period of time makes it compound grief which can be even harder to recover from. How long ago were the losses?
I still feel very numb and have brain fog. I have only brief moments of reality…it’s been 5 months today since I lost my mom. I did gain weight during this time so I’ve decided to start to get back to my healthy eating as this could be why I feel so bad.
Yes, grief also affects us physically. It may or may not be from the weight gain, but grief itself affects us physically. Please reach out if you are wanting/needing any additional help or tools for your grief recovery. team.griefhelpchat.com/session
The worst thing in grief is that nothing more makes sense after she is gone, life is not worth living...emptiness takes place of all my being.
Yes everything is turned upside down and nothing seems to make sense. I want to encourage you that you can find your way and discover new meaning for your life and your future. Please reach out if you are wanting/needing help with your recovery. team.griefhelpchat.com/session
I woke up one day asking where's the sickening sadness gone, that was heavy this is still heavy I'm embracing being harmlessly crazy while I contemplate where to from here....not looking at the past at all... that got buried in the cemetery too
Take your time and contemplate your next course carefully. Many people make rash decisions and mistakes when they are in a place of hurting. Give yourself space and time to navigate this new terrain. Sending you love, courage, and strength for the journey ahead!
I lost my husband of almost 68 years ten months ago. I guess I'm better but I will never be great again. I keep fairly busy, yoga 3 times/wk, grief group once a week, bible study but the evenings are worse. Nobody to talk to.
I"m so sorry for your loss. Maybe don't focus on if you will ever feel great again, but focus on feeling a little better each and every day. That's a very attainable thing and before you know it, you just may find yourself feeling great. Sending you courage, love and strength for the journey.
I lost my girlfriend of 5 years .2 and half months ago. She committed suicide without any warning .i dont know how to process that
I’m so sorry to hear about your girlfriend. There is healing available even though it will take time and tremendous effort on your part. We are here to help and know that you can and will find joy again. Please reach out if you would like to connect.
I find that doing meditation helps to ease the pain. I have to do it often. Its been 6 months since losing the most important relationship in my life and only easing the pain while time passes is helping me. There are many guided meditations on TH-cam . Love and luck to us all :)
Thank You ❤
This discussion is so theoretical. There really are no stages for grief. ‘Progress’ is not a straight path. And I wonder if this speaker has confronted loss and even then the significance of loss is so different for everyone.
The speaker has experienced tremendous loss and this is not meant to be a straight path of healing but rather a guide to help people know what they might expect in different phases. Part of what is so difficult about grief is that no one talks about the effects and it can make you feel alone and/or crazy. The video is meant to help.
🥲thank you
Gonzalez Elizabeth Moore Jennifer Miller Frank
💕
Total bullshit to squeeze grief into stages. Nothing of what that lady babbles applies to me.
Not trying to squeeze grief into stages....trying to give people an idea of what to expect and helpful tools based on the time after the loss. If this doesnt resonate or apply to you, you are certainly justified to not watch or comment. Wish you well in your grief recovery journey.
Thank you 💕