My Heart and Legs are Open
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ก.ย. 2024
- Jennifer and Pumps get real kinky in today's episode. Jennifer does a dramatic reading of a recent article detailing the BDSM world of Conservatives and Liberals. The girls also listen to your voice memos covering topics from the toothpicking pants-hiking chili-eating old men that call waitresses “darlin” to the gay couples out there that continuously get asked if they’re siblings.
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"I'm gonna defend you, you weren't that way". Such a simple statement means so much coming from a friend
‘Fuck if I know, or care.’ My new favorite line.
I'm going to use it at work!
U😅
I just want to thank you for giving us the term “saggin dragons” I was helping my disabled mother get her top on the other day and I told her to tame her saggin dragons , she laughed so hard she almost pee’d her pants 😂❤❤❤
When my daughter went off to college, I bought her a huge black suitcase which she painted bright flowers, polka dots and stripes on. She never has trouble spotting her bag on the carousel. I’m thought it was brilliant but then again I’m biased ❤
Omggggg! When my wife and I first started dating (we live in Austin) we went to a gas station and the cashier asked if she was my mom. We are only six years apart she is half Mexican brown eyes, dark hair and I’m 1000% white dark blonde hair green eyes….. I have never laughed so hard in my life. Love you ladies❤
That’s funny. I was at Trader Joe’s with my sister in law (also straight) and we were looking for an item. I heard “can you help those two? That lesbian couple there😂 I looked at her and we laughed “Well… thank you. We’re not there yet lol”
One time this lady asked If I was the mom of my older sister.... she's 3 years older and I'm 21
Discovered your videos just a few days ago. You ladies are awesome! Thank you for standing up for LGBTQ community. I just shared this video on my FB page with a caption: "These ladies are a HOOT!!"
I think this brings up a deeper issue re: airports - many ppl have fear around travel and flying (even if they don’t think so or say so). They feel completely out of control being in a giant plane in the sky. So because they feel like they have no control over their lives; they attempt to smother every other aspect of the air travel experience to compensate
@@longarmoftheOOHLALA agreed!
I would like to seen Jennifer’s mom as a guest! I wanna hear her wonderful point of view
Leash and walked around Walmart.... My literal response was "Not the Walmart... Can you imagine thinking the hottest sexual experience you'll ever have involves Walmart. It's the lack of self respect for me" 😂
as a former walmart employee if i saw that in a walmart i wouldn’t even be surprised tbh
@@salemmdean it pains me to know I can't even disagree with you 😅
I kept my child's name a secret so my family wouldn't shit on it before I got the chance to love it myself lol
That's the only reason to do it imo. I have a family like that too. The only other reason is also of you have a narcissistic sibling who will copy you. I've heard that before too.
I would NEVER ask what the name is going to be. Non of my F’n business!!
Hey ladies just wanted to let y’all know we’re still boycotting Starbucks. I understand maybe not speaking on Palestine because of some sponsors or money but not drinking coffee is the minimum we as Americans can do. I love your podcast and support your political views and ally ship which is why I’m confused on this point and hope y’all can do better. 22:12
When I was a toddler, my mother refused to do baby-talk. She later told me:” If my child can learn what a ‘meow’ is, they can learn the word ‘cat’, too. My children aren’t dumb idiots.”😂😂😂 Although she had to learn later in life that both her children are, in fact, dumb idiots, lol.
Dang Pumps just looks better and better! I just watched Sweet Home Oklahoma and wow she’s fully transformed. 🎉
Nailed the clap!!! Angie rocks! Fabulous observation re: elevator etiquette! Love to you both! 🙂
It’s the half step between Pumps cackling about the Scissor Sl*t review when it cuts to Jen, tight lipped in shock going * 👁️👄👁️ WHAT?!* Sent me to the fucking floor
"What species are you having?"
Trains are the same you can't get on the train or bus until the people's get off
I avoid the crowd around bag carousel by waiting at the very end of it and have a bright pink tag so I can keep my eyes on it as it travels past the hoards to me.
0:38 absolutely one of the most annoying things ever, same with people that don’t allow passengers of the Bus 🚌 to exit first, before they run into it
The lack of self awareness in public places is getting beyond 😵💫
I love you judge judy diana & jessica 🖤🖤🖤
Lord thank you for your Nutrafol discount and my hair is now getting thicker! My hair was falling left and right like a foliage and if I’ve walked pass any crime scene my DNA would have been there and I’ll be in jail! Lord know how that works out 😂😂😂😂
Lesbians have 2 engagement parties? That's a win for the brides and for the guests, in my book 😂
I hate when people use public spaces to teach toddlers how to adult. I waited behind a coffee line for 30 mins because s guy was trying to wrangle two toddlers asking them to sit and come back, buying them caffeinated coffee and brownies and asking them to go vet money and tip and figure it out. He shows up all the time and does this. They also crawl over the floor, jump on him like a jungle gym and run around.
I am so knowing this my granddaughter is due a week ago and she will not tell any of us his name and I get it because when their first child was coming they told everyone the name they had picked out and a cousin of hers got a puppy and named it the name. omg now no one in my huge family will even think the the name they're thinking of. So whereas before I didn't get this issue I do now. It's so weird, I don't know what to think in the 60's when I had my boys I can't imagine the name thing happening. The world has passed me by when I blinked it all changed. Anyway love you girls just found you and have laughed for the last three days straight. Thanks
I've Had It with city people driving down the middle of our back roads. I have a huge 4x4 with a lift kit and side mirrors, these people drive their cars down the middle of the road. Teetering on the edge of the road/ditch waiting for a tire to grab and pull me in with someone driving like they have to touch the center line. Drive the main roads and/or learn driving narrow back roads where the big trucks roam. I didn't buy the damn truck but I do drive it.
On the naming a first born is horribly difficult! Later, not much! Think about it!
I told my sons when they were in middle schoolers that I'd love and support there choices in partners in life no matter what sexual orientation or color. I love my children more than life and I want to be a part of their lives as long as I can. I have bi-racial grandchildren who are beautiful and smart and amazingly good people and I fear for them.
lol kinda cracks me up my name is used in many ways as examples, but also slightly jarring 😂
Pumps‘ laugh heals me, podcast by podcast.
Best tag line for an episode ❤️ My heart and legs are open😂
PROSELYTIZE.......not "prostelize". 4 syllables. Thank-you. :) Oh yes, I forgot. You guys are f*cking HILARIOUS! I'm addicted!
Ugh Jen always look so chic & the walk in wardrobe from patreon 😍 i need to know where Jens jumper’s from
My son's name is "River". he is six years old if my mom still refers to him as "the baby" 😂 she refuses to call him by his actual name. It makes me laugh. It's her problem not mine.
I would never worry about Commander! He's a bad dog!
I think Commander picked up on some bad vibes and was taking care of problems for Joe. Now he’s the asshole. Free Commander!!
Here’s the difference between telling people baby’s name BEFORE you give birth & AFTER you give birth: if you tell someone the name you have picked out BEFORE child is born and that person (maybe grandpa or grandma) doesn’t like it - they are going to continue to pressure you to change it to something that they like until the kid is born and that, I think we can all agree, is annoying ASF. Now if you tell everybody the name AFTER the baby is born, AFTER it’s already written on the birth certificate, then everybody has to keep their mouth shut about the name because there’s no changing it now 😇 yes it is silly - people shouldn’t care one way or another if they really like the name they’ll stick to it either way. HOWEVER I’m ALL for protecting your peace up until delivery date ✌️ ps never even been pregnant before but as an outsider looking in, that’s my 2 cents 😗
The domination and political humiliation remind me of the movie National Lampoon's Animal House when the dude in the conservative frat house bends the big girl over to relive his anger after failing to become class president.
Relieve
I live in miami and the Uber and Lyft situation here is out of control. These men are insane. They will blast their terrible terrible Hispanic music. I straight up tell them to turn off the music. Usually they don’t speak English so I let them know through sign language. I think it’s invasive to think your passenger wants to listen to toxic music loud as hell. Like no sir, I am paying for this ride, and I’m going to work, where I teach yoga. I need to be zen right now. Fuck
14:01 screaming Laurent bobert to me
i know of a mom in a baby group who shared the name, and another mom said oh that’s cute and did the same first AND middle name. now i think that’s a lil crazy
I see it as flattering
omg, the call about the old lady asking that couple if they were twins reminds me of a time when my boyfriend and i were at Total wine and the cashier (who looked to be early 20s, like us) asked my boyfriend if i was his daughter... we are both the same age and are completely different races :D ....
I get the name secrecy to a point of like maybe they aren't sold on it or they're waiting to see if they still like it when the kid is born...but like you can say that.
HOWEVER, i'd think it'd be so weird if someone I was close to & would see/hang out with often, named their kid the same as mine & then obviously later on the kids would be around each other. like you said...there's millions of names, if my kid was born first, why'd you have to pick that name? 😅😂
They're always like, "I don't want anyone stealing our name," and it's something common as all shit, like, "John," or, "Michael." WTF?
Get over it. My first name is Jennifer. For 15 years it was the #1 name for girls. It seemed like every girl was named Jennifer. I got over it. People who make a stink about sharing their baby’s name is dramatic
Start saying something to people who are not paying attention. Say "hey, could you wait till we get off the elevator bfore you get on?" please"? Really ladies. When you get older, like me, you will say things you migh be holding back now. Its fun!!!!
I’ll take the refusal to tell your baby name even further. I have a granddaughter that is 2 1/2 years old and I still don’t know her full name! My son and his wife just told us what they want us to call her. 🙄
Maby the gay guys were finishing each other's sentences like twins do.
Circling back to a comment Angie made on a prior episode, I actually saw a minivan today driving … the windows had not only their cash app handle, but also their Venmo … what is wrong with people? Welcome to grifting in 2023!
Omg I am pissing myself laughing at this great podcast I just found. Thank you. I too am a server and 2 months ago a 70 year old Blind man hit on me!! What a laugh we girls had😂😅
I like to push every floor before I get off, so the next person has to stop at every floor.😏
Very good reason to ignore religiosity - bollocks to them 😂
38:50
Im about to call yall out because I genuinely think yall both and Kylie are all gorgeous, and I know siblings that are 13 years apart, so when I started watching I had no idea if you were all dating or siblings or just friends or what.
I probably didn't ask to flatter you, but I did ask knowing you'd feel flattered. Im just genuinely a curious guy who is also a yackmouth sometimes
I pray I didn't misspell your name Kylie
I will further research this topic
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ok but Pumps is basically wearing the lesbian flag
Abby if you’re reading this come see me at Willow & Jo salon in Muskogee xoxo
I think it weird my sister called her son same name as her brother called his son.
Just want to add that not ALL Religon and Christians are horrible and if we truly live like Jesus we sit with everyone. I am 100% a Christian and the church I attend are a doors wide open type of church. ALL are welcome. There's always bad apples in the bunch, but there's also good ones. We love you Jessie!
Funny enough my mother didn't care about telling people my name whilst she was pregnant with me and then her neighbour/bestie called her baby my OG name as she gave birth a week before my mum. So my mum changed my name. I'm 23 for context 😂😂
Kylie😂😂😂😂😂
We british have many faults but I think we are the only country who are prepared to wait our turn
To a fault!
Ummmmm just want to add a bit more onto the kids ordering/server topic...
1. When the kid is competent so when I would get to them they would tell me what they wanted. Then you get the parent argue with them about what they said they wanted.... Like "Oh you won't like/eat that!" " You sure that's what you really want?"...... And goes into this back and forth when Im was just trying to get the damn order!! And it clearly seemed like the kid knew what they wanted!!??
2. Is when you would have a table with a child thats older like 10-13 and the parent wants the kid to order but they are to shy or whatever to tell me what they want. So they are whispering to the parent what they want and the parent then tells me what they are saying .... Like they have to know their kid can't do things for themselves so why not just order for their "Titty Baby!!??" Instead of holding me up for 10 min with this Telephone game Bull Shit!!??!!
Can someone tell me name of your sponsor for dog pre/pro biotic please? Thanks
Same OUTFITS FROM A DIFFERENT DAY??? Did u do more then 1 podcast that day? Sorry just curious lovely ladies
I grew up Catholic. I can’t tell you how many Mary‘s I knew. There was Mary Ann, Mary, Pat, Mary, Jean, or Mary Beth I mean seriously, and some of those are dups. They just need to get over themselves.
I'm still waiting for their take on Palestine vs isreal
You are not hard core Christian if you turn your back on your kid for being gay. I would say quite the opposite. Screw those parents!
I don't like Country Music either AT ALL.
Jen, your Josh is well groomed! HOT😊
Religion is for people that can't handle reality. ❤