Something I see amongst my cis gay men friends is that being on prep and knowing they can't catch HIV, they're not using condoms any more. Except there are so many STIs out there, and HIV is not the only one that can kill. I wish there was more work being put into safe sex messaging for them - prep is a second line of defence, not a guarantee of impunity.
Agreed! Although prep is extremely effective for one STI, safer sex practices as well as regular testing should always be a priority when engaging in any sexual activity. This is why we need even more efforts and resources in comprehensive sex ed
About the term sex ed, I thought I'd bring up that in england, sex ed is called PSHE or Physical, Social, Health and Economic education. PSHE is taught from around year 5 and 6 (9-11) up until the end of secondary school (16 years old). All age appropriately of course :D
so helpful! I have a trans partner who's had traumatic experiences with previous partners due to the feeling of 'expectations' placed on them which has made intimacy a lot more difficult and less enjoyable for both of us, some of these things we were already implementing (deciding that if they want something they will initiate it, stopping without questioning the other, green vs. red zones and preferred names) but other things we weren't! will definitely have a conversation with them on the topics of this episode when we're ready for it, thank you so much
This came up in my recommended, so I'm watching it. Excellent talk, with excellent info and excellent points! And y'all are so lovely! So charismatic, natural, and ...ig for lack of a better term [as a survivor of IPV, SA, & uh etc.], gentle and nice. Like, the stuff about trauma-specific education made me nod instead of cry. And it made me remember a sweet little rhyme/song [with gestures] that a friend was taught in school and demonstrated for me... It was funny & cute done by a guy in his 20s, y'know? Never mind sweet, cos kids need to be taught consent! (Even if it's just "the" areas to not let adults try to see, touch, or show you.) So of course I can't do the dance or sing it, but the words at least, and hopefully you can picture the gestures via my emojis lol. And picture this being performed by a _very_ sassy and super bubbly fella with the most infectious smile & adorable giggle! "Hey! Don't touch me there! ✋️ _This_ is my No-no Square.👇 Stop! Don't touch me there!🤚 _That's called _R /\ P E_ !" 🙌 On the "No-no Square" part, he gestured a circle around his... lower front... That became a running joke, the circle/square thing. Like, "Look me SQUARE in the face and say that..." (while gesturing a circle round his face) Heh. Vexing strangers with that was funny, too. And I'll go on forever if i don't cut it out now, but I have to say: MAJOR raised eyebrows (and way more) to the people who claim ^ _that_ (for example) is in any way "se////ising kids"! It's about _protecting them_ & _teaching them the truth_ - especially cos their abusers lie to them! But they know full well what they're doing. Smh. I'm going to try to keep the "SQUARE in the face" thing in my head to keep it from exploding. Cheers!
In my elementary school (Canada) in grade 7, we were supposed to get sex ed, and then the teachers just... didn't? So we never really got any sex ed (the only stuff was condoms and periods). And now knowing that I'm trans I'm completely lost, so that's awesome LMAO
Glad I found this actually. When I was in high school in small town PA we got a look at sex ed but because it was 2014, it was heteronormative not to mention I grew up in purity culture lite so I didn’t really get much out of it.
my sex ed through all years of school was probably pretty lacking, all i remember is learning about periods, the biological process of concieveing a child, and to wait until you feel ready to have sex. most of what i learned was from a monthly children's magazine called the "Friend post" in swedish which always had a few "body & mind"-pages where health workers answered kids' questions about everything from mental health to friendships, romance and sex. sometimes they also had longer articles about people in specific situations. it was informative in a very casual tone and made me feel really normal when i started developing my sexuality and realized i was a bit more different to my friends than i thought. it definitely helped me keep an open mind about my own identity and not falling for comphet :)
Wild that none of this is taught to us by anyone and we have to go seek it out from magazines or the internet, whatever we can find from outside sources
thank you for this video, I found it very informative. However, although you talked about the 'communication', didn't really dived into 'consent' which I believe is a very important part of the sex ed in general. Maybe you could consider having a full video around the 'consent' topic some time? :) thanks for the good job!
I kinda hate that Daddy and Mommy have become so sexualized. Those are terms used by children. I mean it's fine, but no one should feel weird about a child calling their parents that because that is where it originated.
I think you can sexualize or de-sexualize terms by just the way in which you say it and the tone. It certainly doesn’t have to be sexual but some people choose to make it so and that’s okay if it works for them
Pedantic but possibly important: Among amabs and afabs, camabs and cafabs who are not cis and not dyadic, but some nondyadic folks and noncisgender folks identify as straight... So among cis dyad non straight people, queerness might be more obvious.. but queerness does not translate well for noncis and non-endosex people... Where noncis and non-endosex people see queerness and straightness as multiple forms of sexuality manifesting.. for queerness to become relatable to noncis and non-endosex people, it's time to critique the cis dyad paradigms laden in queerness, as we are seeing this cis dyadism plaguing both queerness and feminisms..
@@zaggora7316 dyadic, endosex, non-intersex refer to people we typically call "biological male" and "biological female" folks. When you say a person is a "biological female", you're asserting that their physical body is endosex with ability to get pregnant with a female gender identity 3. HERE, the doctor looks at the newborn and sees what body parts (sex characteristics) the infant has prenatally and into postpartum stages.. and they have the parts associated the two phrases of "bio male" or "bio female". while nondyadic, intersex refer to people we typically think has a dsd, because they're not endosex... Being intersex just means you have a body different from what our biology textbooks claimed to have with respect to sex characteristics, not whether the intersex person has a disease .. intersex people are not sick or disabled for having sex characteristics that nature provided without our culture understanding this. In short, an endosex person is where the person has a particular body - (male and female refer to gender identity not whether a person has a particular body) - the doctors think are "normal" because they have the right embodiment. the United States believes that people should have a certain reproductive body to be valid. They try to force endosex embodiment onto everyone, with intersex communities being terribly victimized by enforcing endosex embodiment ideology through surgery and hormones. so bigoted.
You could be living so much happier lives than you are. Massively overthinking sex and staggeringly missing the point - it’s about love and intimacy. It comes naturally. What has made you like this?
I beg to differ. Great sex does not come naturally on your first try. It’s like any other experience, you explore and discover what you like and what you don’t like and get better at it. Getting better at something doesn’t diminish the love and intimacy, in my experience it only enhances it
@@QueerCollective exactly my point. You are totally obsessed with sex but haven’t moved on from that. Like a perpetual adolescent. How this comes up in my feed I don’t know, but it proves the point that social media provides an unfortunate platform for the marginal elements of society. Fine for you - you’ve made your choices - but toxic for children.
How would you know I’m obsessed with sex? That’s quite the jump of assumptions. Merely having a discussion about it does not equate an obsession friend. If I talk about any other topic in depth (which we do touch on a wide variety of topics on this podcast) does that mean I’m obsessed with that too? Truly, it’s just curiosity and having the willingness to discuss it more deeply
Not only that, but there is reasonable suspicion that a majority of these people are not actually “trans” but are simply joining what they see as an opportunistic trend. Perhaps it’s to get attention they feel they are entitled to. Perhaps it is a way to feel as if they are a part of something historically meaningful as they do little else with their lives. Perhaps it is a play to get special treatment and special protection under victim group status.
Perhaps it’s gender dysphoria and life saving treatment. Trans isn’t a trend. It’s not “the cool thing to do” because you sadly subject yourself to more harassment in a society that tells you you’re wrong for existing.
I'm trans. I want a nice, quiet life, minding my own business, and I don't mean anyone any harm. I want to be treated with the same respect as anyone else. And I want people to mind their own business, so I and all trans people can live our lives in peace.
@@SkyeID Becoming trans is, after all, the easiest way for an otherwise straight white person to climb to the top of the oppression totem pole. And in a world where being a victim is a currency, that’s a highly valuable option.
13:47 As an aroace person this made me smile that someone mentioned us in this topic❤❤❤
We’ll be bringing lots more content like this so stay tuned 💕
Something I see amongst my cis gay men friends is that being on prep and knowing they can't catch HIV, they're not using condoms any more. Except there are so many STIs out there, and HIV is not the only one that can kill.
I wish there was more work being put into safe sex messaging for them - prep is a second line of defence, not a guarantee of impunity.
Agreed! Although prep is extremely effective for one STI, safer sex practices as well as regular testing should always be a priority when engaging in any sexual activity. This is why we need even more efforts and resources in comprehensive sex ed
About the term sex ed, I thought I'd bring up that in england, sex ed is called PSHE or Physical, Social, Health and Economic education. PSHE is taught from around year 5 and 6 (9-11) up until the end of secondary school (16 years old). All age appropriately of course :D
Thank you for sharing!
so helpful! I have a trans partner who's had traumatic experiences with previous partners due to the feeling of 'expectations' placed on them which has made intimacy a lot more difficult and less enjoyable for both of us, some of these things we were already implementing (deciding that if they want something they will initiate it, stopping without questioning the other, green vs. red zones and preferred names) but other things we weren't! will definitely have a conversation with them on the topics of this episode when we're ready for it, thank you so much
This came up in my recommended, so I'm watching it. Excellent talk, with excellent info and excellent points! And y'all are so lovely! So charismatic, natural, and ...ig for lack of a better term [as a survivor of IPV, SA, & uh etc.], gentle and nice. Like, the stuff about trauma-specific education made me nod instead of cry. And it made me remember a sweet little rhyme/song [with gestures] that a friend was taught in school and demonstrated for me... It was funny & cute done by a guy in his 20s, y'know? Never mind sweet, cos kids need to be taught consent! (Even if it's just "the" areas to not let adults try to see, touch, or show you.) So of course I can't do the dance or sing it, but the words at least, and hopefully you can picture the gestures via my emojis lol. And picture this being performed by a _very_ sassy and super bubbly fella with the most infectious smile & adorable giggle!
"Hey! Don't touch me there! ✋️
_This_ is my No-no Square.👇
Stop! Don't touch me there!🤚
_That's called _R /\ P E_ !" 🙌
On the "No-no Square" part, he gestured a circle around his... lower front... That became a running joke, the circle/square thing. Like, "Look me SQUARE in the face and say that..." (while gesturing a circle round his face) Heh. Vexing strangers with that was funny, too.
And I'll go on forever if i don't cut it out now, but I have to say: MAJOR raised eyebrows (and way more) to the people who claim ^ _that_ (for example) is in any way "se////ising kids"! It's about _protecting them_ & _teaching them the truth_ - especially cos their abusers lie to them! But they know full well what they're doing. Smh. I'm going to try to keep the "SQUARE in the face" thing in my head to keep it from exploding.
Cheers!
Aweeee thank you so much for watching and sharing a personal and sweet story. I hope you continue to have such cute and tender moments 💕
@@QueerCollective Aw, cheers! ❤︎
In my elementary school (Canada) in grade 7, we were supposed to get sex ed, and then the teachers just... didn't? So we never really got any sex ed (the only stuff was condoms and periods). And now knowing that I'm trans I'm completely lost, so that's awesome LMAO
No doubt the sex ed curriculum is pretty much non-existent and needs to improve 😞
Glad I found this actually. When I was in high school in small town PA we got a look at sex ed but because it was 2014, it was heteronormative not to mention I grew up in purity culture lite so I didn’t really get much out of it.
my sex ed through all years of school was probably pretty lacking, all i remember is learning about periods, the biological process of concieveing a child, and to wait until you feel ready to have sex.
most of what i learned was from a monthly children's magazine called the "Friend post" in swedish which always had a few "body & mind"-pages where health workers answered kids' questions about everything from mental health to friendships, romance and sex. sometimes they also had longer articles about people in specific situations.
it was informative in a very casual tone and made me feel really normal when i started developing my sexuality and realized i was a bit more different to my friends than i thought. it definitely helped me keep an open mind about my own identity and not falling for comphet :)
Wild that none of this is taught to us by anyone and we have to go seek it out from magazines or the internet, whatever we can find from outside sources
thank you for this video, I found it very informative. However, although you talked about the 'communication', didn't really dived into 'consent' which I believe is a very important part of the sex ed in general. Maybe you could consider having a full video around the 'consent' topic some time? :) thanks for the good job!
Thank you for your feedback! Certainly a good idea topic for a video. We’ll have to look into it more 🥰
This is really comforting and informative content!
Thank you!
This is so wonderful!!
So glad you like it 💕
23:58 Ive never heard of these?!
Im so happy to hear about this!!! Yayyy
I kinda hate that Daddy and Mommy have become so sexualized. Those are terms used by children. I mean it's fine, but no one should feel weird about a child calling their parents that because that is where it originated.
I think you can sexualize or de-sexualize terms by just the way in which you say it and the tone. It certainly doesn’t have to be sexual but some people choose to make it so and that’s okay if it works for them
@@QueerCollective Yeah, true.
@@QueerCollective I just have encountered certain people who feel weird when a child calls their parents that. Not many people, but some.
Still good to include advice about protection as well😂
Great video. Very informative, and I like how you didn't made it awkward
Glad you liked it!
Loved the episode ^^ queer sex ed is so important fr
So important! 💕
Love this
Thanks for watching! 💕
amazing vid, thank u!
Glad you liked it!
I can't get a girlfriend
How about Kinkysitter for nonbinary.
oouuuuuuu creative
Pedantic but possibly important:
Among amabs and afabs, camabs and cafabs who are not cis and not dyadic, but some nondyadic folks and noncisgender folks identify as straight... So among cis dyad non straight people, queerness might be more obvious.. but queerness does not translate well for noncis and non-endosex people... Where noncis and non-endosex people see queerness and straightness as multiple forms of sexuality manifesting.. for queerness to become relatable to noncis and non-endosex people, it's time to critique the cis dyad paradigms laden in queerness, as we are seeing this cis dyadism plaguing both queerness and feminisms..
Whats non dyadic? Is cafab camab just cis ?
@@zaggora7316 dyadic, endosex, non-intersex refer to people we typically call "biological male" and "biological female" folks. When you say a person is a "biological female", you're asserting that their physical body is endosex with ability to get pregnant with a female gender identity 3. HERE, the doctor looks at the newborn and sees what body parts (sex characteristics) the infant has prenatally and into postpartum stages.. and they have the parts associated the two phrases of "bio male" or "bio female". while nondyadic, intersex refer to people we typically think has a dsd, because they're not endosex...
Being intersex just means you have a body different from what our biology textbooks claimed to have with respect to sex characteristics, not whether the intersex person has a disease .. intersex people are not sick or disabled for having sex characteristics that nature provided without our culture understanding this.
In short, an endosex person is where the person has a particular body - (male and female refer to gender identity not whether a person has a particular body) - the doctors think are "normal" because they have the right embodiment. the United States believes that people should have a certain reproductive body to be valid. They try to force endosex embodiment onto everyone, with intersex communities being terribly victimized by enforcing endosex embodiment ideology through surgery and hormones. so bigoted.
You could be living so much happier lives than you are. Massively overthinking sex and staggeringly missing the point - it’s about love and intimacy. It comes naturally. What has made you like this?
I beg to differ. Great sex does not come naturally on your first try. It’s like any other experience, you explore and discover what you like and what you don’t like and get better at it. Getting better at something doesn’t diminish the love and intimacy, in my experience it only enhances it
@@QueerCollective exactly my point. You are totally obsessed with sex but haven’t moved on from that. Like a perpetual adolescent. How this comes up in my feed I don’t know, but it proves the point that social media provides an unfortunate platform for the marginal elements of society. Fine for you - you’ve made your choices - but toxic for children.
How would you know I’m obsessed with sex? That’s quite the jump of assumptions. Merely having a discussion about it does not equate an obsession friend. If I talk about any other topic in depth (which we do touch on a wide variety of topics on this podcast) does that mean I’m obsessed with that too? Truly, it’s just curiosity and having the willingness to discuss it more deeply
Not only that, but there is reasonable suspicion that a majority of these people are not actually “trans” but are simply joining what they see as an opportunistic trend. Perhaps it’s to get attention they feel they are entitled to. Perhaps it is a way to feel as if they are a part of something historically meaningful as they do little else with their lives. Perhaps it is a play to get special treatment and special protection under victim group status.
Perhaps it’s gender dysphoria and life saving treatment. Trans isn’t a trend. It’s not “the cool thing to do” because you sadly subject yourself to more harassment in a society that tells you you’re wrong for existing.
I'm trans. I want a nice, quiet life, minding my own business, and I don't mean anyone any harm. I want to be treated with the same respect as anyone else. And I want people to mind their own business, so I and all trans people can live our lives in peace.
@@SkyeID Becoming trans is, after all, the easiest way for an otherwise straight white person to climb to the top of the oppression totem pole. And in a world where being a victim is a currency, that’s a highly valuable option.
surprised this didn't take off. Wait no I don't, this sucks.
Personally offended by a little sex-ed huh?
If you don’t like it why couldn’t you just scroll
What didn't you like?