WHAT IS OCD? | DSM-5 CRITERIA | AUTISM & OCD

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ม.ค. 2025

ความคิดเห็น • 449

  • @autumn4723
    @autumn4723 2 ปีที่แล้ว +484

    I just wanted to thank you for talking about the p ocd. I cried along with you, I'm also autistic and have OCD, also a traumatic childhood as a lot of us do. The vividness of those unwanted horrific thoughts made me attempt to end it when I was a teenager because of how incredibly isolating and real it felt. Before I knew what intrusive thoughts were I thought those thoughts were coming from me and it still hurts to think about. Thank you so much for raising awareness, I hope it reaches others who need to hear that they are not alone ❤️

    • @emilybolen128
      @emilybolen128 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      I read your comment and I started crying. I am so sorry that you've felt isolated in your life and tried doing that, but I am so glad that you are here to comment on this video and that you are able to live your life, even if there are difficult times. You are strong and a very brave person, and I believe you can have the courage to go through anything. I wish you the best of luck, and I want you to know that you are never alone, no matter what is happening or who you have with you. Not sure if you are a believer, but God is always with you at the end of the day, despite anything.

    • @c.c.l.9139
      @c.c.l.9139 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @IvanXredpill I would add some caution to that. I have OCD, and possibly autism, and when I got an edible from a dispensary it made me absolutely freak the fuck out. My need to control myself, my environment, and my general situation went bonkers. I felt like reality was ripped out from under me. I do not recommend trying it willy-nilly in an uncontrolled environment.

    • @MDev1997
      @MDev1997 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I had the exact same reaction. I also had a very traumatic childhood and I've literally only told one person about it so it wasn't until recently that I realized it was intrusive thoughts rather than me. Hearing her even briefly touch on it made me feel less isolated and horrible about it

    • @MDev1997
      @MDev1997 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@c.c.l.9139 Yeah I agree. I have a lot of friends who don't react well to it for those same reasons. I react quite well to it because it helps reduce my anxiety along with a bunch of other things, but I know that's definitely not everyone's experience

    • @syl59281
      @syl59281 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      ❤️

  • @somewhat-blue
    @somewhat-blue 2 ปีที่แล้ว +342

    You’ve done something truly amazing by talking about this stuff, Paige, especially the more stigmatized and scary intrusive thoughts. POCD is so sad to me, because so many people - even people with an OCD diagnosis - never get insight about it and spend their whole lives truly thinking they’re monsters because of an OCD symptom. It’s especially awful because in actuality, people with POCD are significantly LESS likely to offend than a random person in the general population, because the very fact that it’s one of your OCD thoughts means you’re horrified by it and don’t want to be thinking about it. Thoughts that don’t bother you don’t get stuck in the OCD brain loop - just like you don’t want to get cancer or another horrible disease, or to hurt yourself or a loved one, you don’t want these thoughts to come true.
    I’ve always had horrible OCD - even when I was five or six, I was truly convinced I was going to be murdered in my sleep if I didn’t follow particular rituals - and have had POCD intrusive thoughts since I was *literally still a young child*. I still remember the first moment of insight into it I had (from an OCD quiz when I was fifteen), it was that much of a life-changing moment for me - you’ve given so many people that moment by being open in this video.

    • @sandrahart6033
      @sandrahart6033 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Thank you for your absolute bravery in talking about POCD! I was abused as a child but it wasn’t until I had my own children that the rabid and oh so tempting thoughts came up. I felt so terrible, dirty and evil! There was no way I EVER wanted my own children to go through that & I was horrified that those thoughts ever came into my head. Over time I decided that I was not going to stop being affectionate to my children - just because I thought things didn’t mean that they had to be acted upon. I got an understanding of how people could do these terrible things - they decided not to fight the good fight!

  • @elisabethopp1
    @elisabethopp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +303

    Paige- I’m so so sorry you struggle with all of this, but as for POCD; THAT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! You can’t help it, I promise you that! I’m a child and I don’t blame you, I can’t blame someone who can’t help this. Yes, it is strongly looked down on as those ACTIONS should be, but thoughts can’t be helped. You are so brave for sharing this. I’m proud of you as a fellow person who struggles with OCD.

    • @somewhat-blue
      @somewhat-blue 2 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      I know people who have dealt with this since THEY were kids. I remember being 10 and worrying about it. Research says people with POCD are significantly LESS likely to actually be offenders than the general population, because if it comes up in your brain as an OCD thought, it’s a sign that the thought is so genuinely horrible and terrifying to you that your brain is getting stuck on it the way it would with something life-threatening. Having obsessive thoughts about getting cancer doesn’t mean you WANT to get cancer, and having obsessive thoughts about hurting kids doesn’t mean you want to hurt kids.

    • @alifmuhammadchicago
      @alifmuhammadchicago 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      That is amazing of you to be so supportive about this terribly painful subject for Paige. It's a brave thing to have even mentioned it. So much respect.

    • @floweryunicorn8888
      @floweryunicorn8888 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@somewhat-blue exactly.Yet people can't seem to understand this, probably because they don't suffer from it and they simply can't understand it.

  • @miramari732
    @miramari732 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    “You are not your thoughts; you are aware of your thoughts." Michael A. Singer (this keeps me grounded when I'm experiencing unwanted thoughts)

    • @FrankieSelf
      @FrankieSelf 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      😭😭😍

    • @thedudefromrobloxx
      @thedudefromrobloxx 8 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Thing is that can become a new ritual and soon enough you can find yourself repeating it excessively in even slightly stressful/anxiety inducing situation. It's a dilemma

  • @samirdurrani9959
    @samirdurrani9959 2 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    Hey Paige, your really brave about talking about your OCD. I also deal with POCD and a variety of other OCD subtypes. Sexual Intrusive Thoughts is the most damaging subtype I personally deal with. Given what you’ve said in your video, I recommend watching a TH-camr called Chrissie Hodges. She is an OCD Advocate and in her videos she talks a lot about OCD, including the POCD subtype. She helps me a lot and I think you’ll find her videos helpful. 🧡

  • @elix1133
    @elix1133 2 ปีที่แล้ว +106

    Intrusive thoughts are fucking awful, agreed. You are not your intrusive thoughts, they do not make you a bad person. Just in case any of y'all needed to hear that.

    • @elisabethopp1
      @elisabethopp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Yes! They DO NOT represent you as a person, because they are not your fault and you can't help them. Just with Paige's struggles with POCD, get help if needed to not act on it.

    • @melovekittie
      @melovekittie 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@elisabethopp1 I reeeeally think we need to push back on the implication that POCD would lead you to act on those unwanted, uncharacteristic, un-you thoughts. Having POCD really just means that you hate those kinds of people so so much and you’re terrified of being anything like that. It’s a way of your brain creating rationalizations for low self-esteem. People with POCD simply do not actually have P tendencies. That needs to be very clear. They could not be farther from that.

    • @elisabethopp1
      @elisabethopp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@melovekittie You’re 100% right. I apologize.

    • @karsenloveskartoons
      @karsenloveskartoons 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      thank you so much! this comment made me cry

    • @vaguelyexhausted
      @vaguelyexhausted ปีที่แล้ว +1

      most helpful thing anyone ever said to me regarding violent or disturbing intrusive thoughts was that it's basically your brain saying "hey wouldn't it be f-ed up if that happened?" it's a hypothetical scenario that your brain is using to process something, and the fact that you find those thoughts upsetting PROVES that they do not align with who you are

  • @socks2756
    @socks2756 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    As a child with OCD I used to hoard so much stuff. I remember I made these “blueberries” out of tissue and I made them because I was pulling the tissues out of the box seeing how many there were and then I realized that I’d be wasting all of them so I made them into “blueberries”. I got super stressed and obsessed with them and this one time someone cleaned my room and threw them away and I had a major panic attack. I had like a full on meltdown.

  • @pirateunicorn42
    @pirateunicorn42 2 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    the way your voice broke talking about pocd is heartbreaking and it is so brave of you to mention it in any capacity. I am autistic and also have OCD so it makes me feel so much less alone that you've uploaded this!! I had a really bad bout of pocd when I got a job working with kids and the absolute hell it put me through is unbelievable. it's scary to admit to having, especially when people have such a limited understanding of how OCD works. ocd fucking sucks and I wouldn't wish it on anyone but it's nice to see others' stories.

  • @aprilmilnes3583
    @aprilmilnes3583 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So I'm 31, and my first-instinct thought about the hoarding of the koolaid jammers pouches..... Those handmade "recycled" purses were a HUGE trend while i was in school and if i could've gotten my mom to make one or at least teach ME how, i totally would have hoarded them too. Now i mostly just hoard jars and string/ribbons, or the recycled reusable bags you get from grocery stores, etc. I just LIMIT how much i will allow myself to keep.

  • @diagorm6254
    @diagorm6254 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Oh, man. the intrusive thoughts are the worst. If I accidentally watch a creepy video then I'm terrified of that thing actually happening to me or my family for months. Edit: I just got to the POCD part and, believe me, you aren't alone. It's a terrible thing and causes me to be terrified to be around children, even though I know that I would never do anything to them.

  • @aimeemcdonald1581
    @aimeemcdonald1581 2 ปีที่แล้ว +139

    OCD sucks!! However, I do disagree that nothing cool comes with OCD- I think because it’s so linked to autism and other forms of neurodivergence, the ‘cool’ traits kind of go unnoticed. I would say that OCD makes me a much more observant person, and sometimes the obsessiveness that is so unhelpful with intrusive thoughts can be applied as commitment and intense passion for things I enjoy. Like you, I likely have other forms of neurodivergence that I just have never sought a ‘diagnosis’ for- so maybe the traits are more linked to that but idk :):)

    • @brittanybryant5878
      @brittanybryant5878 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      I admire you for looking for the up side of this condition. However, I struggle with the same things as Paige does and for me, I would gladly trade my observant trait to have none of these issues.

    • @b.a.shaski3550
      @b.a.shaski3550 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I totally agree. My OCD is a huge nuisance but it absolutely manifests in hyper fixations, pattern recognition, and detail oriented observations, all of which can be kind of cool. I think those are all ASD things too though so maybe Paige just attributes them to her ASD?

    • @aimeemcdonald1581
      @aimeemcdonald1581 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@brittanybryant5878 haha yeah don’t get me wrong I’d trade the traits in in an instant to get rid of ocd. I guess it’s just kind of annoying to be the one type of neurodivergent that doesn’t really have much of an upside

    • @Bobonion
      @Bobonion 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      B. A. Shaski I have OCD too! the only good side to mine is i have an insane amount of information about random topics i get anxiety about and one of my biggest compulsions is researching, so for example i spent nearly 5 months 24/7 researching about the afterlife. like that’s all i could focus on so i now have so much knowledge on literally so many religions across the world and different perspectives and ideas about the afterlife.

    • @b.a.shaski3550
      @b.a.shaski3550 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Bobonion I do stuff like that too! If you want to know random facts about ballroom dancing, star wars, the cholera epidemic in 1820s europe... I got you.

  • @cryptidsunflower
    @cryptidsunflower 2 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Thank you for mentioning pocd. Mine started in childhood itself and had always scared and confused me until I was much older and doing some reading (it's still scary and confusing). I'm still undiagnosed, because like you said, it's very hard to talk about. Only make it into a separate video if it will not be harmful to you and your mental health. Sending love as always!

  • @elliekrausmann
    @elliekrausmann 2 ปีที่แล้ว +117

    Absolutely love your channel!! I’m diagnosed with an OCD and Anxiety disorder and it’s definitely not what the public says it is!😂 thank you so much for explaining everything so well and shedding light on how these things impact your life!💕

  • @blackblackheartsss
    @blackblackheartsss 2 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    OCD is the one mental illness that makes me feel absolutely insane sometimes. This was so comforting to watch and I can’t thank you enough for making this video!

  • @ZophieWithAZee
    @ZophieWithAZee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    hearing you talk about OCD and specifically intrusive thoughts so openly is so amazing, truly. I feel like no one understands how scary intrusive thoughts are, and this just ahhh I’m just so grateful for you talking about this and making these videos 💜

  • @michalahardin2026
    @michalahardin2026 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Before I realized I was autistic I thought I had OCD but the doctor just labeled me a hypochondriac. To this day I struggle to separate myself from the labels others have put on me

    • @Lyonatan
      @Lyonatan 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Here's a label: you are beautiful and there's nothing wrong with you.

    • @memenazi7078
      @memenazi7078 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      They’re not labels they’re brands, as you’ve been abused unknowingly, what you need is emotional healing, real love.

  • @sambastien6083
    @sambastien6083 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My hands are shaking and I;m crying typing this, because for the last several years I have been so afraid of the P one in regards to myself, and the instant relief I felt when I heard you mention it is the reason for m,y tears - thank you so much for talking about this, I hope this comment isn't triggering; I just want you to know how grateful I am to feel less alone and less horrible

  • @wonder6835
    @wonder6835 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    OCD fucking sucks, Im glad you are spreadining information explaining it. The P-OCD stuff i particular is so awful. I used to have that as a mid to late teenager (I know a minor being afraid of being a pedo, some weird fucking shit. It never makes sense). I fortunately grew out of it but its still so stigmatized. Even the OCD subreddit banned discussion of it because of shitty reddit TOS, despite the fact these people will never harm a child. Its scary as fuck to have pocd, especially if you do not know its pocd and literally thing you are a pedo. I am happy you were able to open up about this, as it allows people to realize having pocd does not mean one is a pedo.

  • @carolinac.pereira9422
    @carolinac.pereira9422 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    Hi Paige, I don't usually comment on TH-cam and this will probably get buried, but I just wanted to thank you for your videos. I have never had a diagnosis of ASD (though I was diagnosed with OCD at 17) but so much of what you say in your videos resonates with me. I often feel lonely since it feels like I'm unable to communicate with others or that others speak a different language than mine, and it feels amazing to just hear you because it just makes sense! You seem so genuine and it's incredible. Thank you so much for making this content, really.

    • @eleanormaraal5402
      @eleanormaraal5402 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I’m sorry that you feel lonely. Just a reminder that being lonely is not your fault. Sometimes you are just very unlucky with the people you end up around. As an autistic I am surrounded by some amazing people who understand my stimming and don’t expect me to stretch myself to fit social standards (e.g. smiling). You are a beautiful person and I hope you find people you can really click with.

  • @camiladolorestorales9215
    @camiladolorestorales9215 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The moment you said "my brain is my enemy" I related soo much, I´ve never head anyone else speak about their brains like me.

  • @paigieodo
    @paigieodo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Thank you for making this. I have OCD and relate to a lot of your experiences. It's very hard to talk about some of the more upsetting intrusive thoughts that come along with OCD, but it's important to keep in mind that the reason they're so distressing to have is because they are directly contrary to the kinds of thoughts you wish you were having instead. I don't have POCD (I take issue with calling it that. There's nothing "pedophilic" about not being attracted to children and having unwanted intrusive thoughts about it that cause you stress. But I do know it's common verbiage in the OCD community), but I do have violent sexual intrusive thoughts and I work with children. Those kinds of intrusive thoughts can be really distressing while I'm at work. I relate to you in that way and wanted to say thank you for taking the time to be honest in an effort to create understanding and compassion for people like us. Take care and stay safe.

    • @justincarter3033
      @justincarter3033 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You are amazing, I hope to meet in person one day

  • @ellechouinard445
    @ellechouinard445 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    I was diagnosed with anxiety and OCD as a kid. I don’t know if I would consider these “misdiagnoses” entirely, but I think the large majority of what manifested as these conditions was actually autism, but I was “too smart,” and “mature,” and a “girl,” so it wasn’t looked into very deeply. I now have “depression,” which is actually autistic burnout. It’s always funny navigating what is what in your brain when you do technically meet criteria for a given condition, but is that REALLY the full explanation for your symptoms? I’ve wondered if what I consider to be me engaging in my special interests (collecting, obsessing, researching, and such) is more OCD-esque, but it’s hard to tell.

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Idk abt OCD, but w/ my special interests, they often consume my whole mind for their duration (ADHD Hyperfixations are more intense for me and relatively short lived) so I can see how that's confusing. 💜💜💜

    • @madeleinec1107
      @madeleinec1107 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Omg, I've had the same experience as you! I was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety in my teens, but have realised I'm probably also autistic. I feel like it was so easy to dismiss every "quirk" or difficulty as just an atypical presentation of OCD, nobody even mentioned the possibility of autism until I was an adult :)

    • @waterwraith1189
      @waterwraith1189 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @✨Duckie✨(Key)(all pronouns)
      If you don’t mind me asking, how long are your adhd hyperfixations vs special interests? I relate to other autism symptoms except special interest..? I’m not super smart about a particular subject? I don’t feel like I’m super into or knowledgeable abt mushrooms or Pokémon, ya know? But I get long adhd fixations, year, months.

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@waterwraith1189 I've never had a special interest "stop", tbh. I'm always happy to talk abt them and they make me feel more energetic.
      For Hyperfixations, I can barely focus on anything else because why should I if my hyperfixations are more interesting? This lasts for between a week and several months, I think, but I can't really measure time tbh.

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@waterwraith1189 as for relating to only some symptoms/traits, that's how it is for *_many_* ppl. For ex., I have pretty much every ADHD trait and like a bit over half ASD traits (that I know of) and a zillion overlap traits. A common source of my sensory overload comes from having many sources of sound, and trying to hear them all, which I believe is more closely associated to ADHD.

  • @elisabethopp1
    @elisabethopp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    It’s actually been a discussion between my psychiatrist and I over whether the rituals I do are OCD or autism, or a combination. Like only eating with one design of utensils, which could also be my currently undiagnosed eating disorder. Or only being able to step on the white tiles on my school’s white and blue tiled floor. And I have many guilty thoughts even when I haven’t done anything. But considering I struggle with multiple of the other mental illnesses listed that mean it may just be those and not OCD, who knows? I’m 13 years old and have been diagnosed with OCD and anxiety, as well as an assortment of other mental illnesses, but possibly may have autism as well. I’m a lot like Paige, I’m great at masking and fully understand social cues, but struggle with many other of the autism criteria.
    Edit: I’m watching this and every single thing Paige brings up relates to me, from personifying objects to contamination OCD.

    • @ptlovelight2971
      @ptlovelight2971 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Do you have any favorite serveware/dishware? I only just now realized that I only enjoy eating off of this one green checkered salad plate😂 I absolutely hate using the bigger ones...perhaps this also plays into my disordered eating habits

    • @elisabethopp1
      @elisabethopp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@ptlovelight2971 I do have a favorite glass, but we don't have a different variety of plates and bowls and such, like we do of utensils. However, I'm vegetarian and have been my entire life, and I'm extremely OCD around meat, that is probably what affects my life most, and whenever we eat out, I inspect the serveware to make sure there isn't a speck of anything, and if there is, I just can't eat.

    • @user-hc5dn6gb4m
      @user-hc5dn6gb4m 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I also have autism and have specific cutlery I use at home, I absolutely hate eating at restaurants because their cutlery is different to the ones I normally use. I also worry about the cutlery being dirty or finding hair in my food.

    • @elisabethopp1
      @elisabethopp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@user-hc5dn6gb4m Yes 100% agree and relate to everything you said

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@ptlovelight2971 we had to temporarily switch our dishes, and I wouldn't eat oatmeal from the new bowls since the shape was different than our usual weird cylindrical flat-ish ones. I had to at some point, and now will wait for the new ones to come out of the wash so I can eat oatmeal, because the old ones no longer make sense.
      Sometimes I will look for a dish and say 'all plates are in the wash' or something because but simply does not occur to me to use a different looking plate for that type of food.

  • @AKbaby89
    @AKbaby89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    So I have violent intrusive thoughts, and when I learned that those I had intrusive thoughts of harming, are actually who I care about most, it helped me accept my intrusive thoughts, and its also something I remind myself when I'm having the thoughts.

  • @pinkgummybearparty2366
    @pinkgummybearparty2366 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Im diagnosed w ASD and OCD too (contamination, orderrrr/symmetryyyy, intrusive af thoughts, more more more order/symmetry). I have personified everything too even now when I look at my clothes I feel my feelings are hurt because its hurting theirs if i were to break up w them...But the p ocd is something I recently acknowledged within myself too, only talked to 1 person briefly about it. It has felt like a new dark version of shame about the fact that i had nightmares along those lines. Thank you for starting the conversation. Insanely brave of you

  • @bluntforcetanya
    @bluntforcetanya 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I PERSONIFY OBJECTS WITH AN INTENSITY I DONT EVEN PERSONIFY PEOPLE WITH

  • @SarxTheJew
    @SarxTheJew 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I felt almost everything you had to say in this video. It's hard as hell to talk about intrusive thoughts as it is, so thank you for this and any future videos on the topic.

  • @skypascadi
    @skypascadi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I don't have OCD but I do have BPD and I do have intrusive thoughts related to my well being (or lack thereof). And they just pop up even on a good day and I don't wish them on anybody. The pain of having to explain to someone how every second my brain goes "hmmm maybe you should not be alive rn" is so horrifying. All my love to you.

    • @jewels3846
      @jewels3846 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Ive had to train myself to say cake instead of s**cide or die because intrusive thoughts set off a verbal tic and if it isnt just a load noise it is usually "i should just unlive myself" or "I wanna die/dont want to live"
      When the tic starts ive usually already said "I want -" or "I dont want-" and replace the rest by saying cake.
      Its less mortifying to risk that publicly than the fullthought 💀

  • @athulhu1712
    @athulhu1712 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I didn't realise symmetry OCD was a thing. I don't have OCD, but I can relate to needing to be 'even'. It's just a habit for me and doesn't cause me distress. For as long as I can remember I've needed to make sure both sides of my body are 'even', especially when walking. If one foot stood on a crack, the other needed to stand on a crack or else it would feel off-balance. Same with leaves.
    If I felt a texture with one hand, the other needed to feel it.
    I have ADHD so I do have sensory issues already which is what I think it's related to more than anything.

  • @insertchannelname1223
    @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    11:51 I also personify things too, sometimes w/out even realizing! I'm not sure to what extent, but I remember being the math class and learning that negative numbers don't have square roots and feeling sad because every number deserves a square root.
    Edit: the tiles on my school flor were unequal sizes and shapes, but I have to step on them equally, (tbh I don't think much of that one)

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The next person to have an item better take care of it is relatable as well.

    • @Eric-ic7im
      @Eric-ic7im 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Makes me wonder if Heron of Alexandria (who invented imaginary numbers, among other things) felt the same.

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Eric-ic7im 🤔🤔🤔

    • @memenazi7078
      @memenazi7078 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I couldn’t catch up to my mom in the store once cuz if I step on a crack it’ll break her back.

  • @ashleywilliamson6580
    @ashleywilliamson6580 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Hi Paige. I’ve never been diagnosed formally with anything but I know my tendencies aren’t normal. I’ve never heard anybody else verbalize having to do things equal with their body and have just accepted that I’m weird my whole life.
    Thanks for being so open and letting us know that we’re not alone.

    • @syl59281
      @syl59281 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same here in terms of accepting that you're weird, and not knowing that others can relate because it's not talked about much

  • @nataliefoxmartin9764
    @nataliefoxmartin9764 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The first minute of this video is so relatable.
    Edit: lies. This whole video is relatable, holy shit. Lately I’ve been thinking I have OCD comorbid with everything else and this video has absolutely convinced me of that. I’ve also been having the struggle with “is this OCD? Or my ASD? Or my ADHD?” Meanwhile professionals are like, “it’s none of those, you have none of those things, you have mood disorders. Bipolar and BPD.” It’s like. But I don’t.

  • @danielacedeno3099
    @danielacedeno3099 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Intrusive thoughts are scarier than mainstream horror movies. I take SOSOSOSO much care of getting enough sleep because when I don't sleep or when I consume coffee, there is an important chance of me having violent intrusive thoughts. We processed this with my partner, but dissecting it and talking through it has been the most difficult and scary thing I've done. It's so terrible bc, even though thankfully I don't deal with them often, I hate to think that my brain can think of harming the people I love. The way I've coped with this is to understand the root fear that originated this type of intrusive thoughts, and comfort the version of me I was when the fear appeared, I give myself the understanding and compassion to remember the intrusive thoughts are exactly THE OPPOSITE of who I am and what I value, and that I don't do everything I think of. But I truly truly avoid triggering them as much as I can, because they are the material that horror is made of.

  • @firemonkey19990
    @firemonkey19990 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I didn't know the P-OCD existed till today. I've been experiencing all of my life.and never told anyone. Literally felt like retching everytime it happens. Like it makes me have actually tension throughout my body from the thought
    I was also extremely worried I was just dirty and was holding back urges I had never had
    Thank god that I wasn't that. I would have done bad things to myself to make sure to never hurt another

  • @monsev.arellano9125
    @monsev.arellano9125 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Oh my goodness I'm so grateful you are talking about this! Sometimes I feel like people's brains that have OCD are uncomfortable feeling at peace. It's like oh I'm actually feeling okay today and then your like no something's wrong. I should be worrying about something. I haven't dealt with POCD specifically but I totally understand where you are coming from as I have also dealt with similar themes. I definitely teared up watching this video. I think people who don't have OCD overlook the fact that we don't just deal with anxiety but also a lot of shame from I intrusive thoughts.
    Is OCD classified as neurodivergent? 🤔

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      First part: relatable omfg-
      Answer to question: OCD is a diagnosis of how a brain varies or deviates from the Nuerotypical type or "typical/baseline" way of thought process, emotional inner workings, etc. If that's correct, it is Nuerodivergent.
      It's odd since depression, EDs, anxiety, etc, are about the thoughts and emotions themselves, and I think of them more so as having been a state of being and becoming a bigger part. (Idk if this is universally true, but has thus far been applicable)
      I hope the distinction is helpful.💜💜

    • @memenazi7078
      @memenazi7078 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      They’re definitely all associated with a state of misery, diagnosing the source pain is often what psychiatric institutions fail to do, when neglecting abuse as a primary factor.
      Especially since most in the field are old, and can’t relate to the younger gen’s issues like a peer would.
      And alot of people get into psychology in general because they or their family suffered. Which is ironic since the one thing you need to have as a therapist/psychologist is not knowledge about disorders but good mental health.
      My first and last time seeking psychiatric help there we’re alot of fat professionals. Well, they confirm my thoughts when they open their mouths that they have alot of problems of their own, depression, lack of courage, laziness.
      You can’t find the meaning of life from people who’ve never lived.
      (Oh and I was just emotionally neglected there and left right away)

    • @gladysolvera6566
      @gladysolvera6566 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@insertchannelname1223 *neurotypical * neurodivergent
      P.S. I'm sorry, if I something misspelled I tend to correct it. if you see me writing something incorrect please feel free to tell me.

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@gladysolvera6566 haha yeah I didn't realize. I'm very good at spelling and many words make sense to me (I can hear the L when ppl say "Walk"), but EUs and UEs sound the same ig🤷‍♂️😊

    • @syl59281
      @syl59281 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@gladysolvera6566 I appreciate seeing you correct spelling in a way where you're clearly not trying to be mean. Because I also tend to correct spelling, and don't want to be disliked for it

  • @gryguldbrandsen446
    @gryguldbrandsen446 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is so relieving to hear that other people also struggle with p ocd. It almost ended my life because I felt so disgusting and horrible for so many years, because of something I couldn’t control

  • @audhdbaddie
    @audhdbaddie 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    OCD and specifically POCD ruined my life for so long, thankyou for talking about it ❤️

  • @tokyobateman6610
    @tokyobateman6610 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My sister has always been deathly allergic to peanuts. As a kid whenever I would eat Reese’s PB cups, I would eat them over a plate which was covered in a tissue, I would wear gloves while I ate them and even still avoided touching the peanut butter parts, afterwards I would throw away the tissue + gloves + wrapper and then go wash my hands and brush my teeth. All because I was terrified of accidentally killing my sister.
    I’ve gotten *a lot* better over the years though, it’s now a lot less stressful to eat a doggone snack so I’ll take that as a long-term win

  • @bridgez04
    @bridgez04 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    15:06 I thought I had them just cause I was depressed...thanks for this

  • @linden5165
    @linden5165 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    It may help you Paige, and anyone else who experiences those most upsetting sorts of intrusive thoughts around children to know that such thoughts are very common for parents in pregnancy and with new babies in their lives. I suspect they arise form becoming very aware of the vulnerability of these young lives and having enormous love and caring and nurturing instinct so you start scanning the environment for all threats to their safety including in yourself, your partner and everyone/everything and some of that calculation turns into imagining specific scenarios.
    It really is just a neurological artifact arising up and out of a lot of sub-concious survival and nurture instinct and processing, it is care, concern, vigilance and feeling responsible and loving towards those most vulnerable and precious. It's very, very unpleasant but I had never thought to judge myself for it, because I know with how they make me feel appalled, disgusted, distressed and utterly revolted they represent the opposite of who I am, and ironically those thoughts come from hyper-awareness of nurturing instincts not from evil intent. It is probably a lot more common than people realise. It is similar to things like high place phenomenon and other intrusive thoughts where awareness of a risk becomes imagining it happen, it's actually fear.
    While intrusive thoughts are quite common, there's a big difference from brief and occasional thoughts to those that are persistent and frequent and lead to compulsive behaviours. Anything that is causing distress deserves treatment and support.

  • @MaryanaMaskar
    @MaryanaMaskar 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Wooooow! I had no idea that not being able to throw away things because you've personified them is an OCD thing!

  • @fra4745
    @fra4745 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you so much for talking about POCD, you are so brave I don’t think I could’ve done it. I have never told anyone about it because it absolutely terrifies me

  • @littlepixieme1
    @littlepixieme1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Stuff like this just really reaffirms my self diagnosis with Autism. So much of what you're saying makes sense and is echoed (to a degree) in my own life. I may feel bad about saying I'm autistic without an official diagnosis, but nothing has come up yet that I'm like "well, maybe that's not what I experience"

  • @insertchannelname1223
    @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    For others w/ intrusive thoughts, it helps me to _change_ it if the thought causes distress. For ex., if I have the thought that I am injured when I'm not, I feel the intact skin and imagine the injury closing and healing. If there's a telepathy in the room, I mentally shout so they know not to read _my_ mind and move on to someone else. This takes practice and may need to be applied multiple times per occurrence, and I'm not even sure if this is a legit thing to do or if I made it up, but maybe at least one person will read this and have it work.
    You are enough, its okay not to be okay. It's better to woory about parts of your life that are in your control than not.💜💜💜

    • @insertchannelname1223
      @insertchannelname1223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Forgot to say that sometimes this work w/ some harmful stims (I managed to 'stop' scratching my hands by using my knuckles and not nails so it wouldn't hurt, or by drawing on them with soft markers,) but idk if that's ome-off either

  • @julia15206
    @julia15206 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Omg same! Its torture and while it used to be more bad for me some years ago, i heard a while ago my gut feeling say 'how can you be so sure?' to me after I said 'no!' to it, but it didnt shut up, so for some reason i had a good logic comeback to it that made it stop and it was ' because i dont listen to mean things'. So to everyone who is struggeling -be kind to yourself because you do deserve it. :)

  • @thetonytaye
    @thetonytaye 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    It’s funny, in my screenwriting class (of all places) some of my classmates were talking about intrusive thoughts that they had. Like someone had a thought where they’re on a highway and might bump into another car. My professor (I think) even chimed in that he once thought about dropping his infant son on his head when carrying him.

  • @DoNotTestMe
    @DoNotTestMe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    When you started talking about the horrific intrusive thoughts I immediately started crying because I hate myself so hard for the horrific intrusive thoughts I have. Just have to remember that our brains use these thoughts against us as intrusive thoughts because they are the thoughts that are most opposed to who we are, our values and what we would ever dream of doing, and that’s why they’re so distressing. I would really appreciate a video on this personally because it’s really hard not to feel alone in it, but please only do so if you have the emotional strength/capacity to. Take care of yourself ♥️

    • @SoupyDaze
      @SoupyDaze 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The intrusive thoughts created a literal living, breathing hell for me just about a year ago. I was recently diagnosed with autism and OCD, and am going through OCD therapy in an attempt to find ways to cope with my triggers. I’ve been dragged through the gutter (and continue to be) by terrible, horrible, and simply “Why would you think that about another person? Stop thinking that!” On an everyday basis. If I can do anything with this, I wanna help people know that they’re not alone. Coming from someone who feels like they’re literally insane some days, living in some sort of paradox, I can definitely relate. Those intrusive thoughts completely stopped me from living a normal life. They still do, to some extent, but I can now go ride my bike without letting thoughts like “I’m gonna run myself off a ditch or into a car” stop me.

  • @alliegove1732
    @alliegove1732 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm glad you spoke about POCD because while I don't have that I know SO many people with OCD who don't realize that's what that is and they're just like, terrified to be near a child because they think something is wrong with them when it is really OCD. The stigma around everything just makes it so much worse too. I will also say that I'm not sure if you mentioned but I have a weird type of OCD where it is contamination OCD but not because I'm a germaphobe but simply because I think it's like, just wrong? Like I'm not afraid of getting sick and will share drinks but if I touch certain doorhandles, drop anything on the floor, touch anything with feet or trash or even a clean trash bag (there are hundreds of other things I could list but no one needs that!), I will clean it. I've always had a hard time categorizing it because it is weird. Anyway, your videos are really interesting and I'm just barely falling down the rabbit hole!

  • @blakedawson944
    @blakedawson944 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have OCD and am trying to get an autism diagnosis. Thank you for putting this into words. I feel seen. OCD is so hard to talk about because it's so stigmatized. It can be so isolating because nobody is talking about it. I thought my whole life like needing to feel even was just something I did. Thank you so much for talking about this stuff and showing not just me but tons of people with OCD that we aren't alone.

  • @leileyking1544
    @leileyking1544 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    was actually just diagnosed w ocd yesterday. been diagnosed w autism and adhd for abt a year now so it was a bit of a shocker, but also extremely understandable. i have a lot of autism rituals, but also a lot of ocd compulsivity’s. picking my split ends and ripping my skin off my fingers are my big ones

  • @gilded_shadow3220
    @gilded_shadow3220 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This is very enlightening and explains a lot for me. Especially the intrusive thoughts, thank you. I'm going to talk to my doctor about this.

  • @meganmakesmagic802
    @meganmakesmagic802 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    As someone newly diagnosed with ASD/ADHD, I RELATE SO HARD TO THE PERSONIFICATION OF EVERYTHING! I also feel like inanimate objects have feelings. I get it!

  • @kristenbarho7463
    @kristenbarho7463 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    17:32 Thank you for being brave enough to share this; I'm so sorry you deal with this and I know a lot of people with similar experiences appreciate that you've made them feel less alone

  • @BrookeDoesScience
    @BrookeDoesScience 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am autistic, have OCD, and relate to you so much!! I appreciate you explaining things and making a lot of my upbringing make sense.

  • @williama7124
    @williama7124 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Hey, to everyone reading this who has OCD, particularly "(P)OCD". Exposure Response Prevention therapy is a miracle worker. I suffered with it for years and never even knew it was OCD.
    If you turn toward the thoughts instead of trying to push them away, they will begin to fade.
    The book Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts by Martin N. Seif and Sally M. Winston is fantastic.

  • @brittanybryant5878
    @brittanybryant5878 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This video means so much to me. Everytime I have told a psychiatrist or therapist about the symmetry part, they look at me like I am stupid and a condition couldn't possibly cause this. My intrusive thoughts are the same as well. I feel seen, I feel heard and you are incredibly brave to share these aspects of our lives.

  • @heather8cake
    @heather8cake 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "Intrusive thoughts are so fucking hard" 100%! Couldn't agree more! I can relate to so many things that you've brought up in this video. Love and support from my soul to yours through the energy waves of the universe ❤

  • @BUG25985
    @BUG25985 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    the animation "contretemps" (here on youtube) really perfectly illustrated my personal struggles with my OCD, especially since mine centers around very awful intrusive thoughts
    I was diagnosed with OCD and ADHD, plus Tricho after a lifetime of symptoms. Getting an adult diagnosis was hard because I have a lifetime of behavior to unlearn.
    Also Hoarding can be thought to be a symptom of some OCD types - as I have the opposite issue, OCD spartanism. It's much deeper than people realize. It's not that one super clean hollywood stereotype.

  • @catz537
    @catz537 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I recently looked into OCD symptoms and subtypes and I'm pretty sure I have it. I'm autistic and I do the sensory symmetry, which I thought was an autism thing. But I also have a lot of the symptoms you mention in this video

  • @AbsintheCosmos43
    @AbsintheCosmos43 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’m OCD and autistic. OCD has been that most challenging disorder I’ve ever had to deal with.

  • @paulanicole4786
    @paulanicole4786 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    intrusive thoughts and obsessions are fucking awful. thank you for sharing your story. sending you lots of love

  • @chanelle6303
    @chanelle6303 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for talking about this, especially intrusive thoughts. I feel it isn't talked about enough and it's scary and lonely when there's no one talking about it. OCD feels like devils snare.

  • @JaeArt3
    @JaeArt3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    🥺🥺 i wish i could say I totally understand where you are coming from but i am so ignorant to all of the OCD that i might now be understanding entirely of how crappy it is.
    Intrusive thoughts are the worst for me and idk exactly what POCD is, i will be looking into it more after this just to understand better. But i cant imagine from what you said and how you reacted that it is terrible.
    Im sorry that you have all this to deal with and i hope that anyone dealing with OCD can find coping mechanisms here and there to make it so much less terrifying for people.
    ❤️❤️ im only medically diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and a personality disorder but I strongly believe that i may have autism and maybe even adhd. If it wasnt for you here speaking so openly about your own life, i would have NEVER been able to help my non-vocal autistic niece get the diagnosis she needed. And for sure i would have spent the rest of my life wondering what was “wrong” with me and why i was so different.
    Thanks to you, i know that nothing is wrong with me and i was just born with a different brain and that is okay. I may not be diagnosed because i no longer have health care and its so hard for me in NC but i will live my life trying to be the best for my niece and speaking for anyone else that cant speak for themselves.
    I appreciate you so much. ❤️❤️

  • @nikkib317
    @nikkib317 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Numbers give me feelings. I cant explain it. I have to set my alarms with certain numbers that feel "good." The number 3 is very important to me.

    • @GlassOfWater808
      @GlassOfWater808 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same here though I am not diagnosed with OCD I just happen to have a lot of symptoms. The number 11 freaks me out, it’s hard to describe. Even typing that out is just so wrong to me. But a number I really do like is 12

  • @julianazuanon5921
    @julianazuanon5921 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I can't explain how much you helped me with this video. I always have this type of intrusive thoughts and it makes me so sad. It's good to feel less lonely in this terrible aspect of OCD.

  • @melodiephoenix
    @melodiephoenix 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have OCD and for me isn’t about cleaning thank you for bringing awareness to what the disorder is.

  • @BloodAndCookiesx
    @BloodAndCookiesx ปีที่แล้ว

    It's always makes me feel such conflicting emotions whenever a fellow OCD sufferer talks about having POCD, because on one hand, I feel less alone but on the other hand, it makes me so sad for them because I know how horrific it is and how low it's taken me. I wish nobody had to go through this, it's an awful feeling but I do sincerely thank you for speaking openly about it. With people who have platforms being open about suffering from it, maybe we can move towards breaking the stigma and having people understand that we're not dangerous.

  • @emilybolen128
    @emilybolen128 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I know you said you don't read comments anymore, but if you happen to stumble upon these, I hope you see that you are greatly appreciated by so many people that are afraid to say their struggles, especially the P intrusive thoughts, among other horrible ones. It is so humanizing to know that someone who is famous on the internet is also human just like the rest of us, and I think we can all feel very connected and closer in sharing our struggles so that we don't have to struggle with shame and any struggle just on our own. I believe we are made to tell each other out struggles, even if it seems so bad, because it will feel so good for everyone when we can share the weight off our shoulders and be able to connect and say, "hey, me too," to something you thought you could never have support with. It's so freeing and connecting. I'm so glad that you have a good community to share this to ♡ and I'm glad that there are understanding and gracious people that won't put you down for a struggle that you can't control. It will be ok

  • @amylou97
    @amylou97 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you for this video. My family members have OCD and I'm trying to understand it more. Im sick of people assuming its just "being tidy". This video was really informative and I really appreciate you talking about it. Especially the intrusive thoughts. Thank you ❤ xx

  • @joshcateyes
    @joshcateyes ปีที่แล้ว

    I can really relate to you as I also have a jumbled mess of diagnoses. ASD, ADHD, OCD, Tourette’s syndrome. It’s a lot to know what trait is what, and sometimes I feel like things overlap and cancel out but I feel like that other times things combine together like a mega power ranger and I end up wasting a full day of my life without accomplishing anything. Anyways thank you again for sharing!

  • @UwU-bk7op
    @UwU-bk7op 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Omg ocd sucks. I’ve had ocd ever since I was 6 and it’s absolutely horrible but I just want y’all to know it gets better so don’t give up. Ik it’s really sucky but try to stay positive no matter how hard it is, you can do this! Im rooting for y’all

  • @justinesullivan5084
    @justinesullivan5084 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you for making this video and continuing to share your story, Paige!!! I resonated with so much of what you were saying, and also learned some new things from this video! I was diagnosed with OCD a little over a year ago and didn't even realize how many areas of my life it had been affecting since I was a kid, until I started receiving treatment. There are so many misconceptions I myself had about OCD, and so many misconceptions that are perpetuated by society. Spreading awareness about OCD and other stigmatized & misunderstood disorders is so important, and I love how you are creating a space to have these conversations on your channel! I also love how you said that your thoughts are not a representation of you. Learning that the intrusive thoughts I have are not a reflection of my value has been one of the most freeing lessons since I started treatment for OCD, and I wanted to thank you for reminding me and others of that -- and I hope that you always remember it too!!! You are so strong and brave for sharing even the most difficult parts of your story! Sending so much love :)

  • @teacherjess580
    @teacherjess580 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have OCD, generalized anxiety, panic disorder, major depression, and PTSD. It is hard. People in the “neurotypical world don’t understand.

  • @Nexishere
    @Nexishere 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    The examples of OCD makes me relieved and concerned because now I know others have certain thoughts I have. The problem is that now I don't know if its an autism

  • @rrubbishruby4930
    @rrubbishruby4930 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you SO much for sharing this. I have ocd and have struggled with ppl in my life always saying ‘I’m so ocd’ or whatever. And I appreciate you sharing the severity and stress ocd causes.

  • @novemberrites7337
    @novemberrites7337 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Paige, thank you for your care, concern, and in my opinion you’re brave vulnerability. I really appreciate you and the content that you choose to share with us. I sincerely value your effort and time. Thank you, from my heart. I hope you’re doing OK, I’m sending you love.

  • @sheebeebuddy6793
    @sheebeebuddy6793 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I’m crying because this is the first time I’ve ever heard someone say out loud that they have POCD. I have agonized over this since childhood, and never even told any of my therapists (even the OCD specialist) because I hold so much shame and fear even though I know its not my fault. I love kids so much which is obviously why my OCD decided to go that route, and it made interacting with kids (the light of my life) so hard. I’m glad to say that I’m past the point of letting it dictate my life (although I still struggle with the intrusive thoughts) but it’s like a huge weight being lifted off my chest to hear you, someone I admire, say that you suffer from this too. Maybe someday I will have the courage to open up about this too because of you

  • @HaphazardPeach
    @HaphazardPeach 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for sharing so much

    • @syl59281
      @syl59281 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's so relatable. It's all we've ever known

  • @elainaluzquinos9898
    @elainaluzquinos9898 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I want to thank you for saying the part about even when your OCD isn't bad you still have it its just not killing you. I have diagnosed OCD and when It is not bad I second guess my diagnosis and try to invalidate myself. I think this is common for people in the OCD community and isn't talked about enough.

  • @xiledpoisonh3idi315
    @xiledpoisonh3idi315 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Omg! I am so sorry about the intrusive thought you shared but I am so glad that you did…. I had the same intrusive thought or something similar for the years while my daughter was growing up (not about her) and I am cringing writing this because until it stopped at some point on its own, I thought I was a monster and I never told anyone! I hope no one is cruel about you sharing it, because I have had the same thing and I am definitely not a P word either. I was recently diagnosed with autism and also have adhd…. I have believed my daughter may have OCD but I definitely related to some of the things in this video as well. I’m not sure I would meet the criteria myself, so maybe it is just autism stuff but as always, I have learned so much from this video and think you are so brave and needed and should be applauded for how well you educate people about disability… without you I don’t know if I would have even sought out my autism diagnosis at 41. Just please make sure that you are also protecting yourself because I would hate for all the good you do here cause you any harm. Hugs!

  • @grapeindisguise8770
    @grapeindisguise8770 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Having ocd is so hard. I actually got in trouble at work this past Saturday when my usual routines were interrupted. Luckily my boss was understanding (her son has Asperger’s and he deals with feelings like this) so she was understanding but annoyed. It’s honestly ruined my life and with the pandemic it got worse because of anxieties. It’s extremely hard to try to explain to someone why you’re upset and then you get overwhelmed and frustrated because you can’t explain why u do it or why u need to do it and they don’t get it. I broke down after work because I didn’t know how to explain that I wish my brain didn’t get upset over this but it does. Everything has a place and a system.

  • @givemeprimelaughter
    @givemeprimelaughter 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Seeing so much of myself in this is terrifying. I share many of these traits but then also think it could be other disorders at play. The stepping on the leaves explanation though ..... Damn, I will admit that I have had that very specific compulsion all my life.
    There are so many other things you mentioned here that I have been dealing with all my life. I won't name them but I see you. I hear you. You are a good person, Paige. OCD may be a part of you but it does not define you.

  • @amandahernandez6117
    @amandahernandez6117 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Im so sorry you are going through that. I also experience the same thing and it’s extremely scary…. This video made me cry and I just want to say that you are not alone.

  • @KittyKat101MT3
    @KittyKat101MT3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I admire your bravery. Please remember that you are good and kind and not your intrusive thoughts!

  • @observer4292
    @observer4292 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I flow through different phases of intensity in certain obsessions and compulsions, but one that’s affected me consistently through the years and has been particularly challenging recently is fear of contamination. It affects my day-to-day in numerous ways. Thank you for sharing this video, hearing you share all of this with everyone was definitely further validating for myself too. After years of trying, I am finally in the process of receiving my autism diagnosis, and I want to highlight the encouragement that you’ve helped myself and so many others feel to pursue either a clinical or self diagnosis. You’re awesome, Paige! Sending love and light 🤍💫

  • @thewitch3368
    @thewitch3368 หลายเดือนก่อน

    13:55 this is very dangerous if ADHD is also present because actually forgetting things reinforces the very stressful lifestyle

  • @kelpfries6169
    @kelpfries6169 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    your whole channel and this video in particular has really helped me. i have yet to get a diagnosis for autism (which I really wish I did since half the battle is knowing if I have it or not, and it would make everything so much clearer for behaving the way I do).
    but I’ve also been struggling with OCD for as long as I could really remember. the intrusive thoughts, broken items cuz of constant rituals, deattachment from the things around me to focus on my obsessions, it sucks. it really does and also having POCD has so much power in ruining my day and it makes me so anxious. thank you for bringing it up.
    and to anyone else, the way I’ve started looking at the aspect of OCD is it’s something trying to help you survive. in a way that makes you shoulder responsibility for everyone else. good intentions, but terrible execution. it helps me acknowledge my OCD without shutting it down and feeding it. to anyone who made it this far in my whole block of text, you can do it! and you’ll be alright.

  • @redbirdtribe
    @redbirdtribe หลายเดือนก่อน

    The ironic thing about checking things ocd is that somtimes if you have to use an object or flip a switch to check somthing is broken or not u will eventually break them way earlier then they should do to usage and then I get more OCD because I'm doing that that it could be broken. So then it just is a vicious cycle. Its so point less and i cant stop :(

  • @abbyhagan3099
    @abbyhagan3099 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Proud of you Paige for speaking about such a difficult topic! One thing you touched on that I feel needs more emphasis is that by definition a disorder is something that causes harm to the individual or disrupts their ability to live a “normal” life. Drives me wild when a neat freak individual goes “oh it’s just my OCD”. No ma’am. Keeping a straight desk isn’t harming you. That’s not OCD.

  • @AKbaby89
    @AKbaby89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Another great video! I recently saw a comment saying that someone had OCD and she liked her ocd because she kept her room clean and her friends would let her clean their rooms, and when someone tried to tell her that she couldn't have ocd if she found it enjoyable, and so many people freaked out on that person for saying ocd isn't enjoyable. Although I don't have ocd, I do have PTSD, anxiety, ADHD, intrusive thoughts, EDs, and depression, and i think i may also have autism, and I see so many people using mental disorders as a quirky personality trait, when in reality they aren't fun for anyone who has them

  • @kendallharris774
    @kendallharris774 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I once heard OCD intrusive thoughts described as images and commands to do the thing you fear the most in the world that you will do. This was told to me by my roommate in an eating disorder residential program whom I had only a few hours before nearly smacked on the side of the head with a pillow at full strength because I wasn't paying attention to my thoughts. Had I followed through and not caught myself, she would have been severely injured (at the very least). I have not had much treatment for my OCD because I have had too much other stuff to deal with, but she had been through a lot of OCD treatment so I trust that her information is correct.
    It is obvious that you, Paige, care deeply about children and want to keep them safe and happy and healthy, so it makes sense that your OCD would target that love and twist it. You are not your thoughts. Thank you for sharing with us and being so open and vulnerable, you make me feel less alone, which is one of the highest compliments I can give.

  • @slaymaster01
    @slaymaster01 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    commenting to say i stand disorded alongside you and we are both good people who are separate from intrusive thoughts. but yes ocd, specifically taboo ocd or POCD really sucks. i am also extremely visual and that element of the mental disorder has been one of the most challenging/painful symptoms in my life so far. may we both find peace 🖤

  • @ariel.1302
    @ariel.1302 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Omg the symmetry, and magical thinking and the intrusive thoughts were me as a child and still some times... I didn’t realize all this was connected...

  • @nnoodlebird
    @nnoodlebird 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you so much for this video Paige. I agree ocd sucks mega a lot. I also have pocd and despite the fact that it is super uncomfortable and scary to talk about (hell im even kinda nervous posting this as a public comment) i'm really grateful you did speak about it especially as somebody who has a large platform because I think it really will help to change people's perceptions and ultimately people will feel less scared and get help sooner. Overall rlly good video thank u❤️

  • @c.c.l.9139
    @c.c.l.9139 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Listening to this video about my own disorder while also obsessively picking my hair just like you. I have several subtypes of OCD, including the big bad you mentioned. I am clinically diagnosed with OCD and suspect I may be on the spectrum.

  • @smilingeva
    @smilingeva 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Omg I never realised that personifying all of your belongings and hoarding was related to OCD! I have always struggled with compulsions and intrusive thoughts and was diagnosed with OCD as a kid but I never imagined there was someone else who also couldn't get rid of their stuff because she thought 'the clothing would get upset'. Thank you so much for making this video💛☀️

  • @caitlinhsu9074
    @caitlinhsu9074 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    That crunchy leaf thing just awoke a PRIMAL MEMORY in me.

  • @polari7658
    @polari7658 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Wait a second. I just related to every single compulsion and intrusive thought you said in this video. I’m diagnosed autistic and my therapist said I have ocd traits and symptoms, but I was just in denial this entire time. As in I have very specific memories doing the exact same thing. And it was just so extreme and I told myself it was fully based in reality.

  • @Alster26
    @Alster26 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm Autistic. I haven't been diagnosed with OCD but I can relate to having intrusive thoughts. I have them all the time. A lot of the time they are self-harm related like my brain will just go: "Let's take this whole bottle of pills." And I have to tell it no. They are paranoid a lot too. Thing like: "Everyone hates you." "You're worthless." "You're a failure." Things I associate with my depressive disorder. The ones that really bug me though are the thoughts of harming others. I'm generally a very compassionate person and I would never intentionally harm someone else, but my brain will just flash images of me causing physical harm to others. Like a common one my brain throws out is breaking people's fingers for some reason and I've never told anyone about it not even my therapist because I've always been afraid they would be horrified by it or think that I was actively wanting to hurt others which couldn't be farther from the truth. There are some other one my brain churns out too but those are the more common ones.

  • @Shadow-zf5uc
    @Shadow-zf5uc 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I struggled with POCD as a teen and I struggle with Harm OCD now. Thank you for being willing to share and it's ok not to share when you don't feel like you can. It's ironic that having an anxiety disorder makes it hard to talk about having an anxiety disorder, but it's true.
    P.S. feel free not to read this if you don't want to know which traits are which. That said, I'm like 99% sure personification of objects (feeling like objects have feelings like a person would) is an autism trait and not another disorder.