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Thanks very much for this, I honestly cried together with her on the part where you were asking, why do you think you are unlovable. And tbh, exactly the same thing come to me as what she answered - I don't know. Having done some introspection, I think I have never felt like I have ever been truly loved by another human being and the biggest hole in my soul is the fact that I even don't know why and can't understand it. It's like the feeling of not being good enough, not deserving love, but on top of that, I have no idea why... it's like I don't understand why other people love each other and how they could love me. I guess in a lot of ways I consider that love is given if you provide/achieve something back so I can't understand love without that and I don't maybe even know fully what that feels. And there is the meta judgment, that I'm a loser/deserve this "exactly because I don't know why". It's kinda these expectations for you to know, and then if you don't know that IS the reason, and it is totally your fault, you loser. Idk if this makes sense to anyone, but I think the experience this girl had on the stage felt so heartwarming that I just wanted to share what a part of my own experience is. And if someone feels the same way - know you are not alone in this!
Dear Julien~ Why did you choose to wear a Gucci brand sweatshirt? I wld really like to know! Do you even know what you are supporting when you wear those high class brands? It goes deeper than just trying to show the world you are rich or well off... I think if you knew, u wldnt wear it. But if u do know, than its actually disgusting. It also shows that you care about what other people think of you and its highly ironic that u are giving lectures on that subject, plus low self esteem. U obviously still suffer from it. U dressed in a Gucci outfit, how inauthentic of u... U have charisma, but u r not fooling me.
Biggest Take Away: It's ok to talk through problems with someone. The world is hard for a lot of people. But after you start to embrace your flaws, you start to notice that you are a gift from God to the World & want to share love, joy, kindness, and positivity with those around you.
What does loving yourself mean? A barrage of questions, the feeling that you have to justify your existence to others, that others have a right to know you and make judgements about you. Sorry but this is very painful to watch.(edit) gosh I struggled through, had to take it in small chunks at a time, finally got to see it through to the end. Powerful stuff. Thank you. And well done to the Lady for having the courage and step forward, and just be who she is.
She’s standing up there feeling unworthy and not beautiful, and all these other things and here I am admiring her wishing I was just as beautiful and brave as her.
Waaaah so beautiful you see that in her. Seeing the good and the bigger in others is a great trait. I hope you in a while can learn to see them in yourself.
That woman has the biggest balls I have ever seen to basically do a public psychology session. Saying what really messes her up in front of so many people, that takes an extraordinary amount of courage. I resonated so much about what she said, but could never do what she did without bursting in tears.
@@lentamintal unless you're a man, then it's considered pathetic. I personally don't believe that but as a man who has been overwhelmed with emotion from time to time and noticed people's reactions to this, I know that it's true
The parts that tell you that you're not good enough, or unloveable, or people are out to get you or destroy you. Shadow work is getting to the root of those and understanding that they aren't outwardly projected onto you but internally projected onto you. Overcoming those, bringing them from subconscious to conscious and changing that internal speak
The parts she thinks are boring are such precious qualities that we don’t see enough of in people these days. I really hope she realizes the value of her qualities.
These qualities just aren’t valued enough. I should know I was exactly the same growing up. People didn’t understand me and I was pretty lonely but I loved myself because I could see the value in them. The sad thing is as I got older I did try to change myself as I kept getting into work situations that just didn’t seem to accept my personality. These situations drained me and made me ill and I lost a couple of really important relationships along the way because by this point I didn’t love myself anymore. They really loved me too and I miss them terribly. I used to feel so connected to myself and knew exactly who I was and I’m ashamed to say I’ve lost that and I’ve never felt so lonely in my whole life. Not sure how to get back to myself again. Also the sad thing is I finally see now that I’m not meant to fit in I was always meant to walk my own path in life. Seems obvious now!
Not valued at all by a lot of people. I am like her, I am very thoughtful and speak slowly, people tend to just start blabbering over me, but what I do right is I avoid people like this when this happens too often and I protect my authenticity at all costs. Glad there are people that realize the value of it!
@@hummingbird4934 I think its not about walking your own path alone, but having your own back and loving yourself. If you seek connection and people understanding you thats perfectly okay. Its okay to have a need for external validation and love. But selfacceptance and self love is a requirement that you can't rely on from external sources. For others to fall in love with your authentic you, you gotta show it! The good and the ugly. So maybe start like the video suggests by reaffirming yourself that you have your own back and whatever you want to hear yourself say. GL!
@@hummingbird4934I have the same problem and it’s really hard but step by step I try to step out of my comfort zone and people who stand out are the most beautiful people there is a reason why you were born and it is to make a change and society will always judge but you will feel better if you are yourself
@@NotAProducer888relatable except I sometimes feel like I have nothing positive to talk about and feel like as if I need to make people feel good so I kinda take the role of the listener and listen to others and react that is the easiest way for me
@@FullCircleTravis No it's not. Most of us pretend to be someone we aren't. You're only real if it comes naturally without you having to force anything. Just show who you actually are, that's what real means.
To the young lady that got up on stage and was willing to be honest, real and vulnerable, that was very brave. Massive respect to you for doing that! I'm actually just like you but magnify it by 100. This was very helpful for me, thank you for willing to get up on stage and put yourself on the line. I'm pretty sure you also helped everyone else at the seminar as well as those viewing this video.
I started using the "it's ok" thing like a mantra especially in social settings, and I realized how much I judge myself, but at the same time I started being much more relaxed and have more fun. It is so powerful
I use this myself: "Exercise no resistance, have no attachment, accept what is, embrace uncertainty and know that all that you control is how you react to something." whenever faced with adversity.
When she said “Defect” my skin crawled. I’ve used that very same word dozens of times in my own writing about myself. It’s hard to believe someone else could have the same horrible self concept. It’s so easy to see yourself in a silo
@@Natural_OrderDon’t give up 💕 I can empathize with how you’re feeling/thinking/what you said. Sending you love. We can be our own worst enemy inside our head (and it’s felt within the body). I know it can be a lil frustrating when people suggest hey just do this or do that, but I still wanna say, if you didn’t watch this whole video, do. And also consider trying what he told her to in the last 5 minutes or so. Not for a week or a month but daily until you feel improvement. Dr. Joe Dispenza’s work is also excellent and life changing (such as his book ‘Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself’ and his meditations, many can be found for free here on YT). You may also like Teal Swan. Omg and listening to Near Death Experiences (NDEs) is very enlightening! Whatever, whoever, we’re all on this crazy journey of life. You matter and I’m touched that you’re here 🤗💞
I used to second-guess myself a lot of times. I have a very strict family, strict enough that I could not be loud in the house at times. I felt very constrained when I was growing up. This made me feel insecure, and it bled into my social interactions. I don't want to ruffle feathers and be too scared to make someone upset. I have outgrown this as I grew up. My default is still being an introvert, but reading, watching these types of discussions, etc., helped me to become more courageous in expressing my views. I now view this reaction as an exercise to help myself become more spontaneous. I really saw myself in her when I was very young.
"Are you living, or are you trying to justify your existence?" This is one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves. I've spent much of my life attempting to justify my existence. Or begging for my right to take up space. To be seen and heard. To be treated fairly. I no longer feel that compulsion (not nearly as much, anyway) , but it's taken a while to get here. I had to survive something that was pretty awful. I even cursed my continued existence for a few years. It led to me to some hard questions and realizations. This woman is exceptionally brave. I hope she understands this. I feel so proud of her. What she expressed is far more relatable than she realized, but she voiced it. Many lack the courage. These kinds of conversations need to be normalized. What you do reminds me a lot of theta healing. Are you familiar with the practice?
The more I see and hear that girl the more I like her. She brings a genuine aura that is unique and charming. That’s a girl I want to have in my life. I will schedule a coaching session with you soon. Great job
That woman is absolutely adorable. It’s a shame that people in life have put her into that place of low self esteem. I hope she develops into a confident person soon, she has a lot to offer the world that she doesn’t realize. If she were my friend I would let her know that she’s awesome without anyone else’s approval, every day.
Yeah, but keep in mind that the fact that she has a NICE FACE plays a VERY BIG ROLE in that you find her ADORABLE. If she was ugly OR average, you wouldn't feel as much empathetic for her. AND we don't know if she is an actress playing this role! Deducing from the state of this world the most probable possibility is that she is an actor. On the other hand if we look through the very possible dishonesty of the guy, the message is good.
The sad part is that people like her are shy and feel unwanted, while most assholes and ignorant people think they're the best and that someone should make them a statue :(
@@mrthegrievous She might be an actress, sure, but if she is, she seriously deserves an oscar. Look at how she is working her hands and eyebrows. The colour of her cheeks. That's real. Or her acting teacher was Gene Cousineau.
@@Hmpfgrmbl It's tricky this stuff. She appears quite convincingly affected all throughout, but, such a person would never possibly allow being recorded at such an uncomfortable moment. What do you believe?
This has proved the fact that no matter what you look like, what your life is like, its your own view of it that matters. The fact that this attractive woman that on the surface looks like she is complete, and ahead of the rest of the field, feels unwanted is unthinkable. This has given me food for thought, and I think I may just start giving myself the benefit of the doubt and see what happens. Thank you.
@hugosnchz2542 That wasn't my point. It was the fact she actually had ALL the boxes ticked, in this case she IS attractive and she actually viewed herself as undesirable, but even so it was still it was her own stance on things that mattered. Basically, the problem is ourselves; ugly or not.
@@hugosnchz2542 If you aren't smart enough to know how to make money, especially in this day and age of unlimited information availability and connectivity in your pocket, along with technological progress, then you have no one but yourself to blame. You also need to be smart enough to know who to pick, and not go around barking up the wrong trees. If life gives you lemons, then make lemonade, or lie on a bed of rotting lemons and cry. The choice ultimately is yours.
I’m 100% sure that I’ve never seen someone more relatable to my mind and situation than this young lady, it was like she was reading the script of my mind..I wish you and myself all the good energy and comfortableness
@@Yggdri you’re really not as alone as it may seem at times. most children aren’t told what they need to hear to help them grow and be confident in who they are. real life isn’t really any different than high school when most people are still trying to impress and be popular/liked
She's doing very hard work up there. I've done this and I was stripped down to the studs and felt like a different person after. But you're close to screaming, crying, crumpling to the ground, punching a wall. Very brave to do.
When he said, what do wish someone had told you? And she immediately said, that you are the most extraordinary person, etc…it took me 32 years to learn that what I really wanted, was to say that to myself. To HEAR that from myself. Once I have that to me, I realized I never needed it from anyone else. That didn’t mean I stopped wanting to hear it from another - I still wanted it - but I own it as a desire, and not a need, and realize that I am my own best friend, lover, parent and child, my own Source, my own creator and creation, my own everything. Giving myself radical permission to be and feel, and to be there with myself. Stop resisting yourself. Give yourself all the radical unconditional love. That’s what you truly want and deserve. Love it, would love to coach people in this. ❤
This guy is amazing. He needs to hold these sessions in schools across the country. I was let down time and time again by my teachers, ridiculed in front of classrooms. All for being so shy I'd freeze up when called upon or i'd resort to bad jokes just to get something out my mouth. I didnt know it at the time, but all these negative experiences will f you up later in life.
Yes it would be useful, but might be hard when they google him and it shows him being banned from australia, japan, UK. And with headlines such as "misogynistic and racist pickup artist". The accusations are clearly just the regular woke/feminist bullshit. But it's not like it's gotten better.
I had the same experiences at school and social interactions where I just wanted to scream at random ( luckily I didn't haha) but your still alive and you're the creator of your own destiny. Rock on man!
And when I got into business public speaking became everyone’s hill to die on. Instead of allowing you to bow out appropriately, they’d double down on the issue and then be surprised at the dumpster fire result.
she's a lot ahead of some people by being able to keep the eye contact nonstop. i could never ever maintain eye contact for more than 5 seconds with anyone
This one brought a tear to my eye. Never stop doing this man, social anxiety and not loving yourself is really high lately with social media and instagram and what not, and not only are you changing their lives, but seeing how it changes them inspires every person watching. God bless brother❤
This session with a young and attractive girl proves that, no matter how smart or attractive you objectively are, the only thing that matters, in the end, is how much of that you believe. If you don't believe it, (maybe because nobody has ever told you, or when you were 5 years old something your parents or your siblings or an external idiot said caused you trauma) you will behave as if you were ugly and stupid, and it will show and elicit reactions in that direction from others. Talking about her but mostly talking about myself, ha! I am 50 and a successful writer, but my rejected 8-year-old is still looking for approval, and that causes me so much anxiety! Thanks for this, I love your sessions
Yeh but there's also a problem in believing that you are smarter/more attractive than you really are. Better to just face the facts, and work on what you need to improve.
@@AryaManIndiaI think it's natural to feel that way and to have negative thoughts/emotions in general. It doesn't neccesarily mean it has something to do with what someone said to you as a child.
Yeah judging by her looks you'd think she's the coach. Almost looks like she's an actor doing a bit. Like she is trying to hide her actual confidence and play awkward.
Honestly, I seriously feel for this woman, she is so so brave for doing this bc I just sit here and imagine myself in the exact same position up there, and I could literally cry and sweat all at the same time....perhaps with shaking too. Well done to her for going up there for us
I'd gonna die immediatley! Right on the stage. My heart would simply stop beating, if I were in this situation. I nearly died by watching this video and I had to stop it for several times. Couldn't stand it. Some times I had moments of aggression, cause I started to ask myself: Who could ever hurt such a wonderful person? For me, the term "boring" was the last thing, I would have thought of her. You just need to look in her eyes. There is a lot of depth. She is just a unicorn. 🦄 And I love the moment, when she lost control over her face and her inner child came out. As a mother, I can tell, how a child looks authentically, when it wants to cry. And I know by heart, what I got to do as a parent. Now, I don't get those parents, who tell their children to stop crying. What's the deal? If the child was quiet, you don't have to take care?? That's very dumb. If a child is too quiet, you lose the control anyway. One day comes the moment, when the parents claim: "Now, we have done anything right. We were good parents. Look at my children, how good are they doing. Just sucessful in every aspect." And if you ask their children, they say about themselfes: "I hope, my life will not last that long. I'm praying for this nightmare to end."
It's okay if that happens and you have a panic attack. That is a normal human response to the stress of a hundred judging eyes. Just know that EVERYBODY feels that way, and everybody who has been on stage and in the audience understands this and will have nothing but compassion for you.
Oh my god, the way her brain and body freeze and her hands wring, I recognise myself so much in there. I saw so many therapists where I couldn’t answer their questions because my brain just froze with anxiety and I felt like shit. It takes a lot of time to let go of that deep fear of judgement and be more gentle of ourselves, to let the flow comme without judging ourselves badly every second. I’m still learning to feel safe in therapist sessions Good luck to every person in that stage, you’re stronger that you think 💪
I think what kind of helped me was when I started having people in my life that absolutely and in every way just hated me. Like they would flat out kill me if they could. It was bad to experience this but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. Now I am not so scared of being rejected any more, because I know how it feels.
This sort of eye contact is based in fight or flight mode, when you feel threatened you keep your eyes on the identified threat at all times to watch for any sudden movements. As a therapist, she may have some trauma related to men and could be projecting this fear onto him.
@@usernameisunavailable8270 she was in fight mode, typically very defensive. And you mentioned looking away, usually flight mode. Both states are based in survival and rooted in early formative experiences
I can literally feel her anxiety. This is so stressful . Her left foot is pointing towards the audiance almost as if she wants to get out of the spotlight . She's brave .
It's frustrating that these techniques have not been readily available to everyone. Mental health is a global problem. Massive hug to the young lady with a heart of gold, she was so courageous and incredibly beautiful ❤ She is going places now.
As l grew into my authentic, vulnerable me...l embrace my nerdiness, and how boring l am to the unawakened. But l am far from boring. I entertain myself no end. I was a jazz hand (full of life, and smiles) all fake. I''m a natural Introvert. People l find exhausting. Now...l smile in truth but never in fake.
This is the best therapy I have ever seen for social anxiety it really gets to the core and it isn’t about changing who u are like with cbt it is about embracing yourself with flaws and all. Amazing work u have helped me more in this video more than any therapist I have ever seen. Finally a therapist that wants authenticity and not trying to change u to fit the stereotypical mold
This is actually a pretty good video showcasing the concept of CBT. He’s focusing on how her thoughts and beliefs are dictating her emotions and behaviors. This is how a lot of therapy is meant to be and it’s so unfortunate many people don’t get this from their first session 💔
After the first 10 mins of watching, I thought wow this woman is amazing and she doesn't even know it. To get up on stage and bare your inner self like that will resonate with a lot of people. Beautiful inside and out ❤ I wish her path all the best 🙏
The worst part of my depression was that I felt bad because I felt bad. When I accepted that I'm the worst possible place I could be - it took a few weeks and started to get better and better. I slowly walked out of this. Just by allowing myself to be in this dark pit and not fighting internally with it!
Improving your mental health and stop being socially anxious starts with finding out you are struggling. I have been struggling and still struggling with social anxiety, but I think this channel really is a great spot of finding help
I'm a 49 year old man and thought through the questions as if directed at me. This was unbelievably helpful. Thank you for this. I'm an introvert but occasionally it seems like hiding from judgement that may not exist outside of myself. The young lady on stage really was fantastic. I felt just like her during most of her experience.
There is something powerfully attractive about someone sincerely speaking their mind, especially if they honestly grapple with their ideas, self-esteem and doubts. It immediately makes me like them more and want to find out more. I wish there were more people like that.
This is making me tear up.... I'm feeling exactly how she feels and I feel seen. Her courage allowed this video to exist and for me to see that I'm not alone. Thank you, Julien for all your work!
As a shy introvert myself, I wouldn't say I feel a desire "to be liked", but a desire to be understood. And with that comes a desire to NOT express myself to many others and build a relationship of understanding with them, as that type of rapport seems taxing. My most stressful moments are when I believe someone misinterprets me or that I know I've misrepresented myself. Sure, external affirmation CAN feel good, but it can also produce it's own pressures. If I was up there when he kneeled down praising me, I'd feel misrepresented. That in itself would be distressing, not a form of positive praise. Having a focus on me when it feels undeserved (which would often be the case) just feels "inauthentic" to me, which is part of the miscommunication. I "care" for that understanding as such is the basic pursuit of expanding social relationships. I'm actually quite content as a "hermit". But if I'm going to socialize, the full desire is in shared communication. Talking doesn't simply consist of "speaking our truth". Communication is inherently about creating understanding. So pausing to think or omitting certain things is a way of crafting a message to create a message that will best convey the desired message. I can't speak "truth" to you. I don't own "my truth". Anything I say will be filtered by you and others. And navigating that is difficult. And any first impressions play a strong factor into representations. And yeah, there's also hesitancy toward sharing "too much". I "fear" expressing myself in ways I don't want others to acknowledge. Where I don't want a relationship to be built on that attribute of myself. Because it's likely something I believe misrepresents who I envision myself to be, something I desire to change about myself. I feel "boring" myself. That there isn't enough to communicate and share. I'm comfortable being boring, I'm not comfortable boring others. Because that's a form of miscommunication. If I feel fine, but you don't, I feel distressed. I could be quiet or I could be speaking up, the issue is if the "message" isn't landing the same as it does for me. Registering that miscommunication is distressing. "Self-Love" is something that seems inauthentic to me. I can appreciate certain aspects of myself and have a base level of self-esteem that allows me to function. But "self-love" as a broader more encompassing idea just seems like Stockholm syndrome to me. It seems more a defense mechanism of a captive situation, than a true feeling. "Living" often requires others. Thus I can't simply "live" without placing pressure and expectations on others. One's "life" with inherently violate another's "life". If I was chosen to go on stage, I'd be constantly questioning if someone else having gone up would have produced a better outcome for everyone else. And if I felt a sense of enjoyment in the result, I'd likely then feel guilty unless I truly believed I offered something unique.
I think you made many great observations that I also felt were being glossed over. Towards the end though it seems to veer into negative self-talk, such as someone else being a better example being on stage. Optimization and having the perfect example or performance is not the goal, it's an iterative process approaching understanding. You don't have to be all at once and represent every nuance and capture it perfectly the first time. That's why several people might go on stage, you might also talk personally about your situation (since generalization will always miss important aspects). Being understood certainly matters a lot, being accepted though helps a lot, because it allows you to work towards being understood.
@@aronhighgrove4100 It's not negative self-talk to recognize that others provide more value than me in certain things. I don't need to be arrogant to have self-respect. I don't feel the need or even really the desire to be acknowledged by others unless I truly believe I provided something of significant value. Again, we are discussing a SOCIAL interaction, my "value" within that context has nothing to do with my self-perception. i intellectually and morally can't drop that. I can't adopt a view that others should just deal with me. That I should feel confident in anything I do. Because such is inherently oppressive on another in such a societal context. I'm not suggestion "optimization", but that BOTH the audience and the person that would take my place would simply benefit MORE than me. Both in feeling that they enjoyed that spotlight, and that the audience benefited more from someone else than me. What does it mean to be "accepted"? As what? Into what? "Accepted" seems to have become blind accommodation, which I think it the antithesis to actually acceptance, which I think requires understanding. The blind compliments all seem so patronizing to me. I fail to understand how you can be accepted without being understood.
Hey, I've felt the same way for the majority of my life. I believe it stems from a lack of foundation internally - a lack of values and ideas that you yourself stand by without question. Nuanced on all grounds? Maybe always seeing both sides, but not quite taking either? Whether it's out of fear of rejection, fear of being perceived, fear of judgement, fear of upsetting others - all of those are putting others' emotions, one of the most unstable human characteristics, and using it to judge yourself and your worth. What are you then? Well, whatever people think you are. I felt a lot of cognitive dissonance when I thought about myself that way. Take this as you will, but it took me coming to Christ to find that foundation to stand on. We have an intrinsic value in the eyes of God. He handcrafted all of us; and yes, suffering is still on earth. It was promised in the same book as everlasting life. It's written that we are fearfully and wonderfully made in Psalm 139. I've heard people call Christians all kinds of things. Weak-minded, crazy, delusional, ignorant, stupid - I've had prayers answered. I wouldn't be here if God hadn't stopped me from doing something brash. I've felt isolated most of my life, dealt with the consequences of oversharing with untrustworthy people, and tried to deal with emotional problems with practical logic and it didn't work (but hey, now I can psychoanalyse people for fun). I have never felt so much peace and contentment before I began taking this walk seriously. I'm sharing this because He helped me, and I really believe He can help you, too, if you let Him. If you shrug this off as some delusional individual on the internet trying to shove religion in your face, I don't blame you. I used to do the same thing. I'm sharing the metaphorical Tourniquet that stopped me from bleeding out because I don't want other people to bleed out when I have a Tourniquet. On the mention of self-love being inauthentic, it is. I believe it's a widely accepted form of taking some sort of control in your life in a world where you are generally at the whim of other people's actions.
he knelt down and praised her because she told him she wanted to be liked. he wouldn’t have done that to you - unless for some reason he wanted to misrepresent you! the message is not that each of us needs what this lady needs. the message is that it is okay for each of us to be ourselves, that none of us are defective. your thoughts about “self-love” are interesting and worth exploring. I’m curious: if you consider a parent loving their child in a broad encompassing way, does that seem like Stockholm Syndrome to you? like they are forced to love their child? I’m talking about a genuine love, where they truly accept and welcome and support their child, whatever their state.
When video started i noticed that she was showing her persona and not showing her real self to the speaker and i do the same all the time.. But as the man started getting deep with her and she opened up slowly i felt as she was speaking of me. And i cried with her . Thank you lady for being real i dont know how to thank you for sharing and making me feel connected as well. ❤
I discovered your channel three days back.. And I m STUNNED.. I have no WORDS to describe how impactful your session is… I m SPEECHLESS.. you are OUT OF THE WORLD
A Newly employed social worker, I am in the most difficult situations right now. Poor self esteem and stress has knocked me down. What a great video. "It's ok".
You can hear a pin drop with the silence in the room. People were clearly listening. And it's that silence which shows how many people suffer from lo self-esteem and we don't even realise it. This was so powerful and amazing! Bravo to the lady for being so brave and amazing and for Julien for sharing his knowledge about low self-esteem ❤
This mirrors how I’ve felt in my life for a very long time, I hope she knows she helped a lot of ppls life by being brave/vulnerable and deciding to put herself out there. Very powerful moment!!
Her patience is amazing. Being asked questions and not being given really enough space and time to process an answer (and rather getting the same questions one after another) can really make anyone stressed out and shut down. She is really showing endurance in a situation where she also is so extremely vulnerable.
He doesn't mean to cut her off while she answers, it's because when he asks a question she already has an answer but is too afraid to say it, that's what he wanted her to respond with.
This is your first video I have watched, mainly because of the title. Man, It hit me hard and deep, this is so relatable content. The way you helped her navigate out of this is commendable. I fall in love with her when she mentioned about the feeling of being ignored/rejected, feeling stupid infront of so many people. Kudos to her for standing there and going through strong stream of self realisation. If she ever reads this, "You are mature, strong, awesome. I Love You! I wish I could make you feel it rather than just saying it" 🙏.
This brought me to tears! As someone who constantly struggles to love himself, this resonated with me and helped nudge me one small step closer in the right direction. Thank you brave young lady. Your much stronger than your think.
This was one of the most helpful 30 minutes of content I have seen recently. I feel the same all the time and trying to reframe my mindset from "What if..." to "What if... So what!?". Anxiety and feeling of being not good enough made me miss out on a lot of opportunities in my life and I don't want to regret what is left. Respect for the courage!❤
This one had me bawling like a baby from how much it brought up in me as well. I relate so much to the “never started loving myself” because one of my earliest memories is wondering why I wasn’t wanted by others, why I was so different and why I wasn’t good enough to be or do what other people did. I hope some day I can meet you in person just to say thank you 🥲
@@bekabeka71 Honestly I'm still working on it because I've spent my whole life strongly hating myself and everything about myself. It's gotten better since I've been following Julien since last March or so but it's been through a lot of what he goes over; inner work, triggering, understanding, and letting go. It's not an easy thing and it does require honest willingness in the ways we usually don't want to be honest as well as shifting our mindset and learning to adopt new ones while learning to let go.
Same. 19:45 I got emotional because I literally felt like he was saying that to me. It kind of disheartening most of us are our worst enemy within our heads.
I felt all of that. I'm struggling with very similar issues. Always want to be perfect so everyone likes me. Which is impossible, and it's okay if people don't like me. I don't like everyone and is perfectly fine. It all comes down to self-love and being grounded in your center as a person. Unshakable by external factors.
I totally agree. I have waves of moments when I’m super confident and don’t care what anyone thinks, and then switch back. Trying to embrace my true feelings and not be afraid to express them. This was great.
@LegendaryRob That is true. The waves. True mastery of yourself then comes when you are able to release the resistance at any time, any circumstance, and just be.
That beautiful young lady is on the path to healing. I hope she realizes just how special God made her. Also, it became obvious that she is smart. I hope her bold move encourages others as well.
Outstanding coaching Julien! This interaction definitely hits home. I relate to her in so many ways, and yet I'm a man. Afraid to be me. Loving, caring, kind, introverted and appreciates depth. All things that I don't think a woman wants or society wants in a man. Not being alpha or macho. Just be me and embrace those qualities. Don't compare to others who may do life differently than me, or behave differently. Being me is all I want to be. This woman IS extraordinary and beautiful in and outside. It's hard to believe she thinks these things about herself. You did an amazing job of letting her see what everyone else sees when she's speaking. She truly was being authentic and vulnerable. You've got a gift my friend.
Being loving, caring, kind, introverted and appreciating depth are all great qualities ! Most people wanna be treated kindly. Not being alpha or macho is great lmao
Julien is absolutely amazing! Doing the work and allowing myself to let go, in only about 3 weeks of following him, the panic attacks have completely ceased, no joke, although there's still anxiety there at times, and the overwhelming feeling of being a victim has seriously shifted. I'm even feeling more, so apathy is also being dealt with. I've lived the last 20 years shut down and terrified of life.
@@JulienHimself Thank you! I've been seeking this type of help for almost 17 years now. I couldn't find anyone who could work with me. I thought I was too f*cked up, nobody could help me. Turns out, I'm no more of a mess than many others. Thank you for the work that you do. You're amazing!!
@@extreme-cm8hb There are amazing teachers around. In 2015, I found an amazing language course, and I couldn't believe how good it was. It was truly transformational in my life and changed my career path and all. It's not that you're beyond "saving" or whatever they may say. Those who follow the standard procedures only get standard results.
@@Julzwkd It's not easy, and it's definitely not a one-and-done process. It takes a while. I've been doing this for 3 months and I'm still learning every day. How long to see noticeable results? I'd say I'm starting to see major results now, but I started seeing noticeable results within a month, I guess. But you may not take that long. I'm a hard case. I've got almost a dozen mental health diagnoses. But this means that if I'm seeing results as quickly as I am, you'll more than likely see results even quicker. However, I have an affordable coach who's gone through Julien's TMM course. I can't afford TMM or Julien at this time.
@@Julzwkd I was just thinking ... If you decide to go into TMM, and you're given Tom from Brazil as a coach, don't give him any money!!!! As soon as I decided that, because it would take almost a year to pay for TMM, I wanted out, and wanted my money back, Tom began ignoring me. He also told me I'd receive my money back within a month, when he finally did answer me, and I waited the month, received nothing back. And when I tried, for the next month, to get in touch with him about my money, he completely ignored me. For a while there, I thought it was Julien f*cking me over and stealing my money, but once I contacted Julien's company, I got my money back and realized it had nothing to do with Julien or his company, it was solely Tom from Brazil. Watch out for that guy!!!!
Julian you missed a good question. Why do you have to be perfect in order to be loved? Would you only love someone else because the other is perfect? Love is perfect when we are capable of giving someone else the space, to be exactly the way they are.
Being a listener is a great quality. Choosing your words carefully is another great quality. I don’t find this BEAUTIFUL lady boring at all…quite the opposite. I never understood why some people always feel the need to fill a quiet room with constant chatter, sometimes it’s just nice to enjoy the silence, within that silence you can gather your own thoughts. How can one ponder over their own thoughts if their mouth is constantly rattling. When I do engage in conversations it’s usually based on facts, if the conversation is mostly opinions (which most conversations are) then I’m mostly just listening, so with that being said…I’m usually the quiet guy in the room.
I love this woman. She is attractive but more importantly she is so pure. She is so innocent like a child but brave at the same time. Most women with her looks are often full of ego but omg she is just different
Julien! Thank you! I started watching this, this morning and i felt just like this girl! I felt her heavy legs, i felt her heart racing… sweating armpits. The awkwardnes… the feeling of almost dying. I have extreme fear of speaking to a group. The moment she started to cry, i started to cry! I also have had this feeling of never being good enough… having a very toxic voice in my head… afterwards i felt so much weight coming of me and i felt so much lighter! I feel like now i can keep going in the right direction.. thank you bro!
Seriously, I've never felt the urge of traspasing the screen and hug someone. She is so sweet, lovable and she is damn pretty, god. I feel really represented on her and thinking I could be similar on any sense of that amazing and magnetic woman made my day.
I've been watching coaching, training, self-healing, etc etc videos, from different kids of professionals. This one is the best I've seen. Thank you both Julien and brave lady for this. It resonates a lot.
Thank you both 🤍 The advice with the photos is great. I did it a few weeks ago because I had the idea of accepting every version of myself. I also wrote down the beliefs that were working in me at that time. I'm learning to be gentle and gracious with myself, especially in moments of faint, helplessness and anger. It's a process. Best wishes 💌
This guy is awesome. I've watched only 3 vids and cried in every one. I can feel the struggle this woman has. It's not that i'm in the same situation but i really felt i was there with my shit. And... She is so brave. Just standing there... Damn. I applaud you! Love yourself, you are amazing, you made a huuuuge step just by confronting your problems and talking about them. This sessions also gave me the hability to love people for who they are and the moment they are in. There is a full potential person in everyone of us and i will think about that as much as I can from now on. Thank you julien! Your work is so damn awesome
My biggest takeaway from this is that knowing I have low self esteem is only the first step. Actually committing to improving self love is the next and it's okay if it's at my own pace. Thank you both for your work
She is so brave, this vulnerability is inspiring, she is radiant, she look smart... Some people relate to you much lady, you are perfect enough for me. 🙌🙌🧿❤
I think a lot of our self-esteem is a result of the way our parents relate and talk to us. And the damage it does to us when it all goes south and the years that follow trying to find the acceptance and love which was missing. But it could also be as a a result of a bad marriage with the wrong partner as well. Thanks to this beautiful and courages lady, we can see first hand how she mirrors our own struggles and lends reality to it. ❤🤗
So brave!! She’s so worried about what other people think,but they all think she’s amazing and they’re happy it’s not them up there. Beautiful woman ❤ it takes a lot of guts to be seen.
It's also about what other people thought of her in the past, not just people in the room. It's a validating experience, but over time even a disapproving audience will not make her as tense anymore, when she loves herself.
That was fantastic. I cried more than she did. I felt like that was me up there in the front of the room. Thank you for sharing this, and to your participant for having the courage to open herself up to you and the audience. A year later and her bravery is still making an impact.
Wow this made me cry a lot and helped me so much. I've done a lot of inner work and I am so proud of the improvement I've made, but I know I'm not fully where I want to be yet. This video gave me exactly the reassurance I needed to keep going because it can get very tiring to do this sort of work all the time, especially if you deal with mental illness. But I know I've establiahed a foundation that will keep carrying me through this journey of life from here on out, there is no going back. This video gave me so much hope. Thank you to this man and this woman. So much truth and love was shown here. Acceptance. That's what we all want, and what we must give ourselves.
Out of all gurus ( most of them fake) Julien is truly a breath of fresh air. He's different, he really and deeply understands human nature more than most greatest therapists and psychologists out there. Instantly subbed! Great material please keep them coming Julien.
I agree. I would also add coaches Craig Kenneth and Doctor K to the list. All three have been of great help to me. Julien regarding self-expression, Doctor K regarding habits and behaviors, and Craig's channel regarding cultivating healthy relationships. For anyone looking for more good channels that teach a lot and are available for free, I'd strongly recommend those.
The way this woman is so open and brave to fully put herself out to the world like this is very beautiful. Her eyes tell a thousand stories and are also very capturing. Much love to this lady ❤👏💪
I cried. To her, not that you need my validation. You are beautiful, physically. But I felt like I just wanted to give you a hug. From the glimpse I saw, I would love to hang out with you. I think you're wonderful, and we're all going through self-doubt at times. But I hope you're doing better now.
I admire her bravery and relate to her so much. I hate that her support system failed her so deeply and genuinely hope she finds the way to make space to be her beautiful self - big small quiet loud - to be good enough. Im sending her so much love.
The work you do julien is important and debunk alot of shit from the self improvement space that say to become extraverted, you acknowledge that it is also ok to be introvert, huge respect julien
Man, to see where that brave soul must be at today!! Proud of you that day, and can only imagine the world transforming love you are giving yourself no matter what level it may be!! ❤🔥🔥🔥
I just recently found Julien and have watched soooo many videos. As other comments have said, self-love, self-awareness, and being yourself, free expression is very rare these days and very difficult for all of us at times. Truly doing gods work Julien, helping so many people with these seminars and the content, certainly helping me discover some things and lessons about myself which I am ever grateful for. Honestly, some of the best work with people I have ever seen, amazing content, thank you all Keep loving yourselves so much that life is but a joyful playground
Only minutes in and youve made an excellent point. We strive for an abundance of approval but when we get it, we realize its only a temporary bandage for a deeper wound. Unfortunately, some might not get the opportunity to see that approval is not what they’re actually looking for
What's so beautiful about this session is you can see in her mimic that she has a social filter for her internal voice. She doesn't want to bother anyone with her internal critic, but yet allows this critic inside her head. This voice creates the distance and dissaproval she experience with others. It"s time to replace this voice with positive feedback about yourself and your experiences. Also, I just wrote this comment to remind myself we think a lot-a-like. Thank you for putting your vulnerability on stage, you're brave!
What an amazing soul this woman has! Not only is she amazingly beautiful , but I can sense she has so much genuine love to give. You are so deserving of all the love available to you. God has just as wonderful person for you as you are! If you ever need a friend I’d love to be that friend.
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Thanks very much for this, I honestly cried together with her on the part where you were asking, why do you think you are unlovable. And tbh, exactly the same thing come to me as what she answered - I don't know. Having done some introspection, I think I have never felt like I have ever been truly loved by another human being and the biggest hole in my soul is the fact that I even don't know why and can't understand it. It's like the feeling of not being good enough, not deserving love, but on top of that, I have no idea why... it's like I don't understand why other people love each other and how they could love me. I guess in a lot of ways I consider that love is given if you provide/achieve something back so I can't understand love without that and I don't maybe even know fully what that feels.
And there is the meta judgment, that I'm a loser/deserve this "exactly because I don't know why". It's kinda these expectations for you to know, and then if you don't know that IS the reason, and it is totally your fault, you loser.
Idk if this makes sense to anyone, but I think the experience this girl had on the stage felt so heartwarming that I just wanted to share what a part of my own experience is. And if someone feels the same way - know you are not alone in this!
Dear Julien~ Why did you choose to wear a Gucci brand sweatshirt? I wld really like to know!
Do you even know what you are supporting when you wear those high class brands? It goes deeper than just trying to show the world you are rich or well off... I think if you knew, u wldnt wear it. But if u do know, than its actually disgusting. It also shows that you care about what other people think of you and its highly ironic that u are giving lectures on that subject, plus low self esteem. U obviously still suffer from it. U dressed in a Gucci outfit, how inauthentic of u... U have charisma, but u r not fooling me.
Biggest Take Away: It's ok to talk through problems with someone. The world is hard for a lot of people. But after you start to embrace your flaws, you start to notice that you are a gift from God to the World & want to share love, joy, kindness, and positivity with those around you.
What does loving yourself mean? A barrage of questions, the feeling that you have to justify your existence to others, that others have a right to know you and make judgements about you. Sorry but this is very painful to watch.(edit) gosh I struggled through, had to take it in small chunks at a time, finally got to see it through to the end. Powerful stuff. Thank you. And well done to the Lady for having the courage and step forward, and just be who she is.
Your getting tension and wanna fuck confused! Me. Reader
She’s standing up there feeling unworthy and not beautiful, and all these other things and here I am admiring her wishing I was just as beautiful and brave as her.
😢
Fr
The grass is always greener on the other side... but it's still just grass.
Waaaah so beautiful you see that in her. Seeing the good and the bigger in others is a great trait. I hope you in a while can learn to see them in yourself.
Society has really done a number of people
That woman has the biggest balls I have ever seen to basically do a public psychology session. Saying what really messes her up in front of so many people, that takes an extraordinary amount of courage. I resonated so much about what she said, but could never do what she did without bursting in tears.
I agree, I have a seriously hard time telling people I’m close to what messes me up
I agree ☝️
I'm with you on all you said.
Crying is accepted. Crying is necessary, crying is normal.
@@lentamintal unless you're a man, then it's considered pathetic.
I personally don't believe that but as a man who has been overwhelmed with emotion from time to time and noticed people's reactions to this, I know that it's true
"You're not here to justify your existance" - absolutely love that.
yeah it did hit me down deep
Jesus justifies us. We only need to be still
Most people try to.
Almost started crying when he said" The love and approval we are so much after is actually our own".
"Stop justifying your existence" Wow!! That was powerful!
Wow. This dude is like the embodiment of shadow work. Straight up honest, non-judging, and caring. Really cool to see.
AND he's been doing this for decades
What's shadow work?
@@HeddanofarsanWorking on the dark inner parts of your psyche
The parts that tell you that you're not good enough, or unloveable, or people are out to get you or destroy you. Shadow work is getting to the root of those and understanding that they aren't outwardly projected onto you but internally projected onto you. Overcoming those, bringing them from subconscious to conscious and changing that internal speak
@@djWOOF Doesn't have to be "dark" per say. Just the unconscious parts of ourselves.
The parts she thinks are boring are such precious qualities that we don’t see enough of in people these days. I really hope she realizes the value of her qualities.
These qualities just aren’t valued enough. I should know I was exactly the same growing up. People didn’t understand me and I was pretty lonely but I loved myself because I could see the value in them. The sad thing is as I got older I did try to change myself as I kept getting into work situations that just didn’t seem to accept my personality. These situations drained me and made me ill and I lost a couple of really important relationships along the way because by this point I didn’t love myself anymore. They really loved me too and I miss them terribly. I used to feel so connected to myself and knew exactly who I was and I’m ashamed to say I’ve lost that and I’ve never felt so lonely in my whole life. Not sure how to get back to myself again. Also the sad thing is I finally see now that I’m not meant to fit in I was always meant to walk my own path in life. Seems obvious now!
Not valued at all by a lot of people. I am like her, I am very thoughtful and speak slowly, people tend to just start blabbering over me, but what I do right is I avoid people like this when this happens too often and I protect my authenticity at all costs. Glad there are people that realize the value of it!
@@hummingbird4934 I think its not about walking your own path alone, but having your own back and loving yourself. If you seek connection and people understanding you thats perfectly okay. Its okay to have a need for external validation and love. But selfacceptance and self love is a requirement that you can't rely on from external sources. For others to fall in love with your authentic you, you gotta show it! The good and the ugly.
So maybe start like the video suggests by reaffirming yourself that you have your own back and whatever you want to hear yourself say. GL!
@@hummingbird4934I have the same problem and it’s really hard but step by step I try to step out of my comfort zone and people who stand out are the most beautiful people there is a reason why you were born and it is to make a change and society will always judge but you will feel better if you are yourself
@@NotAProducer888relatable except I sometimes feel like I have nothing positive to talk about and feel like as if I need to make people feel good so I kinda take the role of the listener and listen to others and react that is the easiest way for me
“Screw being cool, screw being nice, start being real.” ~Julien
screw being real 😅
Everything we do is real. Acting cool and nice is driven by real thoughts and emotions.
@@FullCircleTravisIf you're trying to be cool, then it's not real, is just a persona
@@j.howlett
What's real is the trying.
@@FullCircleTravis No it's not. Most of us pretend to be someone we aren't.
You're only real if it comes naturally without you having to force anything.
Just show who you actually are, that's what real means.
This woman is deeply beautiful inside and out I hope she reads these comments and see how much people admire her.
I hope she’s seeing all the love. I think the majority can resonate with her, she’s incredible
An incredible actress, yes.
To the young lady that got up on stage and was willing to be honest, real and vulnerable, that was very brave. Massive respect to you for doing that! I'm actually just like you but magnify it by 100. This was very helpful for me, thank you for willing to get up on stage and put yourself on the line. I'm pretty sure you also helped everyone else at the seminar as well as those viewing this video.
Yes, it takes a lot of COURAGE and WILLINGNESS to do the work... Massive respect to her! 🙏
I have no idea how I ended up here but I think I needed to see this video tonight too.
yeah mad props to the lovely lady, love her openness and vulnerability.
Her level of self awareness and how quick she processed the questions was very impressive. She is so lovely and gentle.
Wilingness to do the work is key. Props to this lady.
I started using the "it's ok" thing like a mantra especially in social settings, and I realized how much I judge myself, but at the same time I started being much more relaxed and have more fun. It is so powerful
Amazing! 🙏
I use this myself: "Exercise no resistance, have no attachment, accept what is, embrace uncertainty and know that all that you control is how you react to something." whenever faced with adversity.
This comment saved my life. Thank you so much! ❤️
I used it when I was looking at a real cool watch and thinking of stealing it, now I'm in prison,but hey, it's OK! 😂😂😂
@@DanielSoliveres Should have been, "Its o.k, I dont need it that much"
When she said “Defect” my skin crawled. I’ve used that very same word dozens of times in my own writing about myself. It’s hard to believe someone else could have the same horrible self concept. It’s so easy to see yourself in a silo
Same I feel like I am completely defective and useless. Just a reject and worthless human being. It’s hard to see it any other way
@@Natural_OrderDon’t give up 💕 I can empathize with how you’re feeling/thinking/what you said. Sending you love. We can be our own worst enemy inside our head (and it’s felt within the body). I know it can be a lil frustrating when people suggest hey just do this or do that, but I still wanna say, if you didn’t watch this whole video, do. And also consider trying what he told her to in the last 5 minutes or so. Not for a week or a month but daily until you feel improvement. Dr. Joe Dispenza’s work is also excellent and life changing (such as his book ‘Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself’ and his meditations, many can be found for free here on YT). You may also like Teal Swan. Omg and listening to Near Death Experiences (NDEs) is very enlightening! Whatever, whoever, we’re all on this crazy journey of life. You matter and I’m touched that you’re here 🤗💞
Real diamonds have defects ❤
Check out the book called It Didn’t Start With You
I used to second-guess myself a lot of times. I have a very strict family, strict enough that I could not be loud in the house at times. I felt very constrained when I was growing up. This made me feel insecure, and it bled into my social interactions. I don't want to ruffle feathers and be too scared to make someone upset. I have outgrown this as I grew up. My default is still being an introvert, but reading, watching these types of discussions, etc., helped me to become more courageous in expressing my views. I now view this reaction as an exercise to help myself become more spontaneous. I really saw myself in her when I was very young.
"Are you living, or are you trying to justify your existence?"
This is one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves.
I've spent much of my life attempting to justify my existence. Or begging for my right to take up space. To be seen and heard. To be treated fairly. I no longer feel that compulsion (not nearly as much, anyway) , but it's taken a while to get here.
I had to survive something that was pretty awful. I even cursed my continued existence for a few years. It led to me to some hard questions and realizations.
This woman is exceptionally brave. I hope she understands this. I feel so proud of her. What she expressed is far more relatable than she realized, but she voiced it. Many lack the courage.
These kinds of conversations need to be normalized.
What you do reminds me a lot of theta healing. Are you familiar with the practice?
🙌🌟💕
Vivianna Stibal?
The more I see and hear that girl the more I like her. She brings a genuine aura that is unique and charming. That’s a girl I want to have in my life. I will schedule a coaching session with you soon. Great job
That woman is absolutely adorable. It’s a shame that people in life have put her into that place of low self esteem. I hope she develops into a confident person soon, she has a lot to offer the world that she doesn’t realize. If she were my friend I would let her know that she’s awesome without anyone else’s approval, every day.
Yeah, but keep in mind that the fact that she has a NICE FACE plays a VERY BIG ROLE in that you find her ADORABLE. If she was ugly OR average, you wouldn't feel as much empathetic for her.
AND we don't know if she is an actress playing this role! Deducing from the state of this world the most probable possibility is that she is an actor.
On the other hand if we look through the very possible dishonesty of the guy, the message is good.
The sad part is that people like her are shy and feel unwanted, while most assholes and ignorant people think they're the best and that someone should make them a statue :(
@@mrthegrievous She might be an actress, sure, but if she is, she seriously deserves an oscar. Look at how she is working her hands and eyebrows. The colour of her cheeks. That's real. Or her acting teacher was Gene Cousineau.
@@monio.9444 the assholes don’t like themselves. The statues are just an attempt to feel important.
@@Hmpfgrmbl
It's tricky this stuff.
She appears quite convincingly affected all throughout, but, such a person would never possibly allow being recorded at such an uncomfortable moment.
What do you believe?
This has proved the fact that no matter what you look like, what your life is like, its your own view of it that matters. The fact that this attractive woman that on the surface looks like she is complete, and ahead of the rest of the field, feels unwanted is unthinkable. This has given me food for thought, and I think I may just start giving myself the benefit of the doubt and see what happens. Thank you.
yeah... this doesn't work with ugly people
@@hugosnchz2542 It does. You just need to have money, or find the women who are into uglies (there are a lot of them). There's one for every type.
@@NostalgiaforInfinity good thing money grows on the trees these days
@hugosnchz2542 That wasn't my point. It was the fact she actually had ALL the boxes ticked, in this case she IS attractive and she actually viewed herself as undesirable, but even so it was still it was her own stance on things that mattered. Basically, the problem is ourselves; ugly or not.
@@hugosnchz2542 If you aren't smart enough to know how to make money, especially in this day and age of unlimited information availability and connectivity in your pocket, along with technological progress, then you have no one but yourself to blame. You also need to be smart enough to know who to pick, and not go around barking up the wrong trees. If life gives you lemons, then make lemonade, or lie on a bed of rotting lemons and cry. The choice ultimately is yours.
I’m 100% sure that I’ve never seen someone more relatable to my mind and situation than this young lady, it was like she was reading the script of my mind..I wish you and myself all the good energy and comfortableness
totally... it almost gave me shivers..
Ditto
me too ❤ u aren’t alone
Cannot agree more it's scary how relatable this was.
@@Yggdri you’re really not as alone as it may seem at times. most children aren’t told what they need to hear to help them grow and be confident in who they are. real life isn’t really any different than high school when most people are still trying to impress and be popular/liked
She's doing very hard work up there. I've done this and I was stripped down to the studs and felt like a different person after. But you're close to screaming, crying, crumpling to the ground, punching a wall. Very brave to do.
When he said, what do wish someone had told you? And she immediately said, that you are the most extraordinary person, etc…it took me 32 years to learn that what I really wanted, was to say that to myself. To HEAR that from myself. Once I have that to me, I realized I never needed it from anyone else. That didn’t mean I stopped wanting to hear it from another - I still wanted it - but I own it as a desire, and not a need, and realize that I am my own best friend, lover, parent and child, my own Source, my own creator and creation, my own everything. Giving myself radical permission to be and feel, and to be there with myself. Stop resisting yourself. Give yourself all the radical unconditional love. That’s what you truly want and deserve. Love it, would love to coach people in this. ❤
I would be sweating my ass off up in front of everyone if I was her. So awesome to see her conquer her fear and open up in front of all those people.
Extremely brave, I don’t think I could’ve managed as well
No braveness, she's an actress.
@@neodonkey Маєте докази?
@@neodonkeyI knew it! What’s her name?
I’m pretty sure she’s Norwegian
This guy is amazing. He needs to hold these sessions in schools across the country. I was let down time and time again by my teachers, ridiculed in front of classrooms. All for being so shy I'd freeze up when called upon or i'd resort to bad jokes just to get something out my mouth. I didnt know it at the time, but all these negative experiences will f you up later in life.
Yes it would be useful, but might be hard when they google him and it shows him being banned from australia, japan, UK. And with headlines such as "misogynistic and racist pickup artist". The accusations are clearly just the regular woke/feminist bullshit. But it's not like it's gotten better.
I had the same experiences at school and social interactions where I just wanted to scream at random ( luckily I didn't haha) but your still alive and you're the creator of your own destiny. Rock on man!
True, that's why I'm try to find solution now before I regret in old age
And when I got into business public speaking became everyone’s hill to die on. Instead of allowing you to bow out appropriately, they’d double down on the issue and then be surprised at the dumpster fire result.
Totally agree 💯! I took Julien's program and I truly believe it should be taught in schools
She has no idea how brave she is! And still able to express herself so good in front of the group.
So well
Because she's an actress.
"Are you living or just trying to justify your existence", made something bloom inside of my heart.
she's a lot ahead of some people by being able to keep the eye contact nonstop. i could never ever maintain eye contact for more than 5 seconds with anyone
Me either!!!!!! I’m so glad her conscious was helping her.❤
I had to fight hard to look people in the eye, then progress to maintaining it long enough.
It’s like she’s avoiding looking at the audience and feels safer looking at him
That's exactly what's going on. She avoids eye contact with the audience because she feels awkward and afraid.@@rileywiebe3512
@@rileywiebe3512that’s exactly what it is
This one brought a tear to my eye. Never stop doing this man, social anxiety and not loving yourself is really high lately with social media and instagram and what not, and not only are you changing their lives, but seeing how it changes them inspires every person watching. God bless brother❤
Thank you! A LOT more to come! 🙏
This session with a young and attractive girl proves that, no matter how smart or attractive you objectively are, the only thing that matters, in the end, is how much of that you believe. If you don't believe it, (maybe because nobody has ever told you, or when you were 5 years old something your parents or your siblings or an external idiot said caused you trauma) you will behave as if you were ugly and stupid, and it will show and elicit reactions in that direction from others. Talking about her but mostly talking about myself, ha! I am 50 and a successful writer, but my rejected 8-year-old is still looking for approval, and that causes me so much anxiety! Thanks for this, I love your sessions
Deep rooted core beliefs and trauma runs us all, yes... Fortunately there's a way to LET GO of this! 🙏
Yeh but there's also a problem in believing that you are smarter/more attractive than you really are. Better to just face the facts, and work on what you need to improve.
@@AryaManIndiaI think it's natural to feel that way and to have negative thoughts/emotions in general. It doesn't neccesarily mean it has something to do with what someone said to you as a child.
Yeah judging by her looks you'd think she's the coach. Almost looks like she's an actor doing a bit. Like she is trying to hide her actual confidence and play awkward.
She’s actually average looking
Honestly, I seriously feel for this woman, she is so so brave for doing this bc I just sit here and imagine myself in the exact same position up there, and I could literally cry and sweat all at the same time....perhaps with shaking too. Well done to her for going up there for us
right
me too👏
Same
I'd gonna die immediatley! Right on the stage. My heart would simply stop beating, if I were in this situation. I nearly died by watching this video and I had to stop it for several times. Couldn't stand it.
Some times I had moments of aggression, cause I started to ask myself: Who could ever hurt such a wonderful person?
For me, the term "boring" was the last thing, I would have thought of her. You just need to look in her eyes. There is a lot of depth. She is just a unicorn. 🦄
And I love the moment, when she lost control over her face and her inner child came out. As a mother, I can tell, how a child looks authentically, when it wants to cry.
And I know by heart, what I got to do as a parent. Now, I don't get those parents, who tell their children to stop crying. What's the deal? If the child was quiet, you don't have to take care?? That's very dumb. If a child is too quiet, you lose the control anyway.
One day comes the moment, when the parents claim: "Now, we have done anything right. We were good parents. Look at my children, how good are they doing. Just sucessful in every aspect."
And if you ask their children, they say about themselfes: "I hope, my life will not last that long. I'm praying for this nightmare to end."
It's okay if that happens and you have a panic attack. That is a normal human response to the stress of a hundred judging eyes. Just know that EVERYBODY feels that way, and everybody who has been on stage and in the audience understands this and will have nothing but compassion for you.
Oh my god, the way her brain and body freeze and her hands wring, I recognise myself so much in there. I saw so many therapists where I couldn’t answer their questions because my brain just froze with anxiety and I felt like shit. It takes a lot of time to let go of that deep fear of judgement and be more gentle of ourselves, to let the flow comme without judging ourselves badly every second. I’m still learning to feel safe in therapist sessions
Good luck to every person in that stage, you’re stronger that you think 💪
This!
👏💕
❤
I think what kind of helped me was when I started having people in my life that absolutely and in every way just hated me. Like they would flat out kill me if they could. It was bad to experience this but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. Now I am not so scared of being rejected any more, because I know how it feels.
Hmmm, tough
This beautiful lady has all kinds of courage and is so absolutely sweet I want to give her a huge hug ❤
I'm amazed by how she's able to hold eye contact for so long. She never looked away!
As a person who has infinite eye contact i have to remind myself to occasionally break it like normal people.
Girls are much comfortable with eye contact
This sort of eye contact is based in fight or flight mode, when you feel threatened you keep your eyes on the identified threat at all times to watch for any sudden movements. As a therapist, she may have some trauma related to men and could be projecting this fear onto him.
@@mord0Yeah but for me who's always in flight mode, I always try to look away.
@@usernameisunavailable8270 she was in fight mode, typically very defensive. And you mentioned looking away, usually flight mode. Both states are based in survival and rooted in early formative experiences
I can literally feel her anxiety. This is so stressful . Her left foot is pointing towards the audiance almost as if she wants to get out of the spotlight . She's brave .
It's frustrating that these techniques have not been readily available to everyone. Mental health is a global problem.
Massive hug to the young lady with a heart of gold, she was so courageous and incredibly beautiful ❤ She is going places now.
As l grew into my authentic, vulnerable me...l embrace my nerdiness, and how boring l am to the unawakened. But l am far from boring. I entertain myself no end. I was a jazz hand (full of life, and smiles) all fake. I''m a natural Introvert. People l find exhausting. Now...l smile in truth but never in fake.
Her eye contact is probably the best I've ever seen.
This is the best therapy I have ever seen for social anxiety it really gets to the core and it isn’t about changing who u are like with cbt it is about embracing yourself with flaws and all. Amazing work u have helped me more in this video more than any therapist I have ever seen. Finally a therapist that wants authenticity and not trying to change u to fit the stereotypical mold
This is actually a pretty good video showcasing the concept of CBT. He’s focusing on how her thoughts and beliefs are dictating her emotions and behaviors. This is how a lot of therapy is meant to be and it’s so unfortunate many people don’t get this from their first session 💔
After the first 10 mins of watching, I thought wow this woman is amazing and she doesn't even know it. To get up on stage and bare your inner self like that will resonate with a lot of people. Beautiful inside and out ❤ I wish her path all the best 🙏
The worst part of my depression was that I felt bad because I felt bad. When I accepted that I'm the worst possible place I could be - it took a few weeks and started to get better and better. I slowly walked out of this. Just by allowing myself to be in this dark pit and not fighting internally with it!
Wow, I do same😂😂😂 in my case 3, 4 days are enough to be in the dark pit
That was beautiful, the more she was openly talking the more impressed i was with her.
Improving your mental health and stop being socially anxious starts with finding out you are struggling. I have been struggling and still struggling with social anxiety, but I think this channel really is a great spot of finding help
I'm a 49 year old man and thought through the questions as if directed at me. This was unbelievably helpful. Thank you for this. I'm an introvert but occasionally it seems like hiding from judgement that may not exist outside of myself. The young lady on stage really was fantastic. I felt just like her during most of her experience.
Did you get hot flashes, too like her?
"Are you living or trying to justify your existence?" wow.... that hit me
There is something powerfully attractive about someone sincerely speaking their mind, especially if they honestly grapple with their ideas, self-esteem and doubts. It immediately makes me like them more and want to find out more. I wish there were more people like that.
This is making me tear up.... I'm feeling exactly how she feels and I feel seen. Her courage allowed this video to exist and for me to see that I'm not alone. Thank you, Julien for all your work!
As a shy introvert myself, I wouldn't say I feel a desire "to be liked", but a desire to be understood. And with that comes a desire to NOT express myself to many others and build a relationship of understanding with them, as that type of rapport seems taxing. My most stressful moments are when I believe someone misinterprets me or that I know I've misrepresented myself.
Sure, external affirmation CAN feel good, but it can also produce it's own pressures. If I was up there when he kneeled down praising me, I'd feel misrepresented. That in itself would be distressing, not a form of positive praise. Having a focus on me when it feels undeserved (which would often be the case) just feels "inauthentic" to me, which is part of the miscommunication.
I "care" for that understanding as such is the basic pursuit of expanding social relationships. I'm actually quite content as a "hermit". But if I'm going to socialize, the full desire is in shared communication.
Talking doesn't simply consist of "speaking our truth". Communication is inherently about creating understanding. So pausing to think or omitting certain things is a way of crafting a message to create a message that will best convey the desired message. I can't speak "truth" to you. I don't own "my truth". Anything I say will be filtered by you and others. And navigating that is difficult. And any first impressions play a strong factor into representations.
And yeah, there's also hesitancy toward sharing "too much". I "fear" expressing myself in ways I don't want others to acknowledge. Where I don't want a relationship to be built on that attribute of myself. Because it's likely something I believe misrepresents who I envision myself to be, something I desire to change about myself. I feel "boring" myself. That there isn't enough to communicate and share. I'm comfortable being boring, I'm not comfortable boring others. Because that's a form of miscommunication.
If I feel fine, but you don't, I feel distressed. I could be quiet or I could be speaking up, the issue is if the "message" isn't landing the same as it does for me. Registering that miscommunication is distressing.
"Self-Love" is something that seems inauthentic to me. I can appreciate certain aspects of myself and have a base level of self-esteem that allows me to function. But "self-love" as a broader more encompassing idea just seems like Stockholm syndrome to me. It seems more a defense mechanism of a captive situation, than a true feeling.
"Living" often requires others. Thus I can't simply "live" without placing pressure and expectations on others. One's "life" with inherently violate another's "life". If I was chosen to go on stage, I'd be constantly questioning if someone else having gone up would have produced a better outcome for everyone else. And if I felt a sense of enjoyment in the result, I'd likely then feel guilty unless I truly believed I offered something unique.
I got more from your comment than all the TH-cam video’s combined. Thank you for articulating what I so loudly feel within. ❤🙏🏻
I think you made many great observations that I also felt were being glossed over. Towards the end though it seems to veer into negative self-talk, such as someone else being a better example being on stage.
Optimization and having the perfect example or performance is not the goal, it's an iterative process approaching understanding. You don't have to be all at once and represent every nuance and capture it perfectly the first time. That's why several people might go on stage, you might also talk personally about your situation (since generalization will always miss important aspects).
Being understood certainly matters a lot, being accepted though helps a lot, because it allows you to work towards being understood.
@@aronhighgrove4100 It's not negative self-talk to recognize that others provide more value than me in certain things. I don't need to be arrogant to have self-respect. I don't feel the need or even really the desire to be acknowledged by others unless I truly believe I provided something of significant value. Again, we are discussing a SOCIAL interaction, my "value" within that context has nothing to do with my self-perception.
i intellectually and morally can't drop that. I can't adopt a view that others should just deal with me. That I should feel confident in anything I do. Because such is inherently oppressive on another in such a societal context.
I'm not suggestion "optimization", but that BOTH the audience and the person that would take my place would simply benefit MORE than me. Both in feeling that they enjoyed that spotlight, and that the audience benefited more from someone else than me.
What does it mean to be "accepted"? As what? Into what? "Accepted" seems to have become blind accommodation, which I think it the antithesis to actually acceptance, which I think requires understanding. The blind compliments all seem so patronizing to me. I fail to understand how you can be accepted without being understood.
Hey, I've felt the same way for the majority of my life. I believe it stems from a lack of foundation internally - a lack of values and ideas that you yourself stand by without question. Nuanced on all grounds? Maybe always seeing both sides, but not quite taking either?
Whether it's out of fear of rejection, fear of being perceived, fear of judgement, fear of upsetting others - all of those are putting others' emotions, one of the most unstable human characteristics, and using it to judge yourself and your worth. What are you then? Well, whatever people think you are.
I felt a lot of cognitive dissonance when I thought about myself that way. Take this as you will, but it took me coming to Christ to find that foundation to stand on. We have an intrinsic value in the eyes of God. He handcrafted all of us; and yes, suffering is still on earth. It was promised in the same book as everlasting life. It's written that we are fearfully and wonderfully made in Psalm 139.
I've heard people call Christians all kinds of things. Weak-minded, crazy, delusional, ignorant, stupid - I've had prayers answered. I wouldn't be here if God hadn't stopped me from doing something brash. I've felt isolated most of my life, dealt with the consequences of oversharing with untrustworthy people, and tried to deal with emotional problems with practical logic and it didn't work (but hey, now I can psychoanalyse people for fun). I have never felt so much peace and contentment before I began taking this walk seriously.
I'm sharing this because He helped me, and I really believe He can help you, too, if you let Him. If you shrug this off as some delusional individual on the internet trying to shove religion in your face, I don't blame you. I used to do the same thing. I'm sharing the metaphorical Tourniquet that stopped me from bleeding out because I don't want other people to bleed out when I have a Tourniquet.
On the mention of self-love being inauthentic, it is. I believe it's a widely accepted form of taking some sort of control in your life in a world where you are generally at the whim of other people's actions.
he knelt down and praised her because she told him she wanted to be liked. he wouldn’t have done that to you - unless for some reason he wanted to misrepresent you!
the message is not that each of us needs what this lady needs.
the message is that it is okay for each of us to be ourselves, that none of us are defective.
your thoughts about “self-love” are interesting and worth exploring. I’m curious: if you consider a parent loving their child in a broad encompassing way, does that seem like Stockholm Syndrome to you? like they are forced to love their child? I’m talking about a genuine love, where they truly accept and welcome and support their child, whatever their state.
The "it's okay" hit really close to home. as so often you upload those videos at just the right moment.
Glad that part spoke to you! 🙏
When video started i noticed that she was showing her persona and not showing her real self to the speaker and i do the same all the time..
But as the man started getting deep with her and she opened up slowly i felt as she was speaking of me. And i cried with her .
Thank you lady for being real i dont know how to thank you for sharing and making me feel connected as well. ❤
I discovered your channel three days back.. And I m STUNNED.. I have no WORDS to describe how impactful your session is… I m SPEECHLESS.. you are OUT OF THE WORLD
A Newly employed social worker, I am in the most difficult situations right now. Poor self esteem and stress has knocked me down. What a great video. "It's ok".
She's brave and attractive as heck 😍
It takes A LOT of courage to put yourself out there and COMMIT to your own well being... Massive respect to her! 🙏
totally agree 😍
How disappointing that we cannot even look past her appearance to see or hear what she is really saying.
@@sm.9599 Part of why she's attractive us because of what's she's saying. Imo
She is very attractive! The jawline.
You can hear a pin drop with the silence in the room. People were clearly listening. And it's that silence which shows how many people suffer from lo self-esteem and we don't even realise it.
This was so powerful and amazing! Bravo to the lady for being so brave and amazing and for Julien for sharing his knowledge about low self-esteem ❤
my self esteem
This mirrors how I’ve felt in my life for a very long time, I hope she knows she helped a lot of ppls life by being brave/vulnerable and deciding to put herself out there. Very powerful moment!!
Her patience is amazing. Being asked questions and not being given really enough space and time to process an answer (and rather getting the same questions one after another) can really make anyone stressed out and shut down. She is really showing endurance in a situation where she also is so extremely vulnerable.
He doesn't mean to cut her off while she answers, it's because when he asks a question she already has an answer but is too afraid to say it, that's what he wanted her to respond with.
We could watch the impact of his work as she went from fidgeting to standing so peacefully still at the end... 👏
This is your first video I have watched, mainly because of the title.
Man, It hit me hard and deep, this is so relatable content. The way you helped her navigate out of this is commendable.
I fall in love with her when she mentioned about the feeling of being ignored/rejected, feeling stupid infront of so many people. Kudos to her for standing there and going through strong stream of self realisation. If she ever reads this, "You are mature, strong, awesome. I Love You! I wish I could make you feel it rather than just saying it" 🙏.
This brought me to tears! As someone who constantly struggles to love himself, this resonated with me and helped nudge me one small step closer in the right direction. Thank you brave young lady. Your much stronger than your think.
This was one of the most helpful 30 minutes of content I have seen recently. I feel the same all the time and trying to reframe my mindset from "What if..." to "What if... So what!?". Anxiety and feeling of being not good enough made me miss out on a lot of opportunities in my life and I don't want to regret what is left. Respect for the courage!❤
She’s truly lovely.
Thanks for being for us Julien❤
This one had me bawling like a baby from how much it brought up in me as well. I relate so much to the “never started loving myself” because one of my earliest memories is wondering why I wasn’t wanted by others, why I was so different and why I wasn’t good enough to be or do what other people did. I hope some day I can meet you in person just to say thank you 🥲
And how did you change that?
@@bekabeka71 Honestly I'm still working on it because I've spent my whole life strongly hating myself and everything about myself. It's gotten better since I've been following Julien since last March or so but it's been through a lot of what he goes over; inner work, triggering, understanding, and letting go. It's not an easy thing and it does require honest willingness in the ways we usually don't want to be honest as well as shifting our mindset and learning to adopt new ones while learning to let go.
Same. 19:45 I got emotional because I literally felt like he was saying that to me. It kind of disheartening most of us are our worst enemy within our heads.
it all comes from thoughts and actions of our parents .. mostly mothers when we were in the womb until 5 yrs of age.
I felt all of that. I'm struggling with very similar issues. Always want to be perfect so everyone likes me. Which is impossible, and it's okay if people don't like me. I don't like everyone and is perfectly fine. It all comes down to self-love and being grounded in your center as a person. Unshakable by external factors.
I totally agree. I have waves of moments when I’m super confident and don’t care what anyone thinks, and then switch back. Trying to embrace my true feelings and not be afraid to express them. This was great.
@LegendaryRob That is true. The waves. True mastery of yourself then comes when you are able to release the resistance at any time, any circumstance, and just be.
@@crystalgonzales4534 🖨️
Thank you for offering her a hug at the end, I felt like she needed that the entire time. 🥺
That beautiful young lady is on the path to healing. I hope she realizes just how special God made her. Also, it became obvious that she is smart. I hope her bold move encourages others as well.
Lets not forget she also has a good quality of active listening. She listens a lot and why we find her attractive 😊❤
Outstanding coaching Julien! This interaction definitely hits home. I relate to her in so many ways, and yet I'm a man. Afraid to be me. Loving, caring, kind, introverted and appreciates depth. All things that I don't think a woman wants or society wants in a man. Not being alpha or macho. Just be me and embrace those qualities. Don't compare to others who may do life differently than me, or behave differently. Being me is all I want to be.
This woman IS extraordinary and beautiful in and outside. It's hard to believe she thinks these things about herself.
You did an amazing job of letting her see what everyone else sees when she's speaking. She truly was being authentic and vulnerable.
You've got a gift my friend.
Being loving, caring, kind, introverted and appreciating depth are all great qualities ! Most people wanna be treated kindly. Not being alpha or macho is great lmao
Julien is absolutely amazing! Doing the work and allowing myself to let go, in only about 3 weeks of following him, the panic attacks have completely ceased, no joke, although there's still anxiety there at times, and the overwhelming feeling of being a victim has seriously shifted. I'm even feeling more, so apathy is also being dealt with. I've lived the last 20 years shut down and terrified of life.
Congrats on your progress!! Thanks for sharing! 🙏
@@JulienHimself Thank you! I've been seeking this type of help for almost 17 years now. I couldn't find anyone who could work with me. I thought I was too f*cked up, nobody could help me. Turns out, I'm no more of a mess than many others. Thank you for the work that you do. You're amazing!!
@@extreme-cm8hb There are amazing teachers around. In 2015, I found an amazing language course, and I couldn't believe how good it was. It was truly transformational in my life and changed my career path and all.
It's not that you're beyond "saving" or whatever they may say. Those who follow the standard procedures only get standard results.
@@Julzwkd It's not easy, and it's definitely not a one-and-done process. It takes a while. I've been doing this for 3 months and I'm still learning every day. How long to see noticeable results? I'd say I'm starting to see major results now, but I started seeing noticeable results within a month, I guess. But you may not take that long. I'm a hard case. I've got almost a dozen mental health diagnoses. But this means that if I'm seeing results as quickly as I am, you'll more than likely see results even quicker. However, I have an affordable coach who's gone through Julien's TMM course. I can't afford TMM or Julien at this time.
@@Julzwkd I was just thinking ... If you decide to go into TMM, and you're given Tom from Brazil as a coach, don't give him any money!!!! As soon as I decided that, because it would take almost a year to pay for TMM, I wanted out, and wanted my money back, Tom began ignoring me. He also told me I'd receive my money back within a month, when he finally did answer me, and I waited the month, received nothing back. And when I tried, for the next month, to get in touch with him about my money, he completely ignored me. For a while there, I thought it was Julien f*cking me over and stealing my money, but once I contacted Julien's company, I got my money back and realized it had nothing to do with Julien or his company, it was solely Tom from Brazil. Watch out for that guy!!!!
Julian you missed a good question. Why do you have to be perfect in order to be loved? Would you only love someone else because the other is perfect? Love is perfect when we are capable of giving someone else the space, to be exactly the way they are.
Being a listener is a great quality. Choosing your words carefully is another great quality. I don’t find this BEAUTIFUL lady boring at all…quite the opposite. I never understood why some people always feel the need to fill a quiet room with constant chatter, sometimes it’s just nice to enjoy the silence, within that silence you can gather your own thoughts. How can one ponder over their own thoughts if their mouth is constantly rattling. When I do engage in conversations it’s usually based on facts, if the conversation is mostly opinions (which most conversations are) then I’m mostly just listening, so with that being said…I’m usually the quiet guy in the room.
am i the only one who allmost cried while watching this ?
I cried a little bit when she started crying
No you're not.
you cried , b/c she is beloved
Almost cried you say I can barely see the screen
Not almost. .
I love this woman. She is attractive but more importantly she is so pure. She is so innocent like a child but brave at the same time. Most women with her looks are often full of ego but omg she is just different
Sounds like if she was hideous you wouldn't be saying this. Not would this video have gotten this many views.
Julien! Thank you! I started watching this, this morning and i felt just like this girl! I felt her heavy legs, i felt her heart racing… sweating armpits. The awkwardnes… the feeling of almost dying. I have extreme fear of speaking to a group. The moment she started to cry, i started to cry! I also have had this feeling of never being good enough… having a very toxic voice in my head… afterwards i felt so much weight coming of me and i felt so much lighter! I feel like now i can keep going in the right direction.. thank you bro!
Seriously, I've never felt the urge of traspasing the screen and hug someone. She is so sweet, lovable and she is damn pretty, god. I feel really represented on her and thinking I could be similar on any sense of that amazing and magnetic woman made my day.
I've been watching coaching, training, self-healing, etc etc videos, from different kids of professionals.
This one is the best I've seen. Thank you both Julien and brave lady for this. It resonates a lot.
Thank you both 🤍
The advice with the photos is great. I did it a few weeks ago because I had the idea of accepting every version of myself. I also wrote down the beliefs that were working in me at that time. I'm learning to be gentle and gracious with myself, especially in moments of faint, helplessness and anger. It's a process.
Best wishes 💌
This guy is awesome. I've watched only 3 vids and cried in every one.
I can feel the struggle this woman has. It's not that i'm in the same situation but i really felt i was there with my shit.
And... She is so brave. Just standing there... Damn. I applaud you! Love yourself, you are amazing, you made a huuuuge step just by confronting your problems and talking about them.
This sessions also gave me the hability to love people for who they are and the moment they are in. There is a full potential person in everyone of us and i will think about that as much as I can from now on.
Thank you julien! Your work is so damn awesome
My biggest takeaway from this is that knowing I have low self esteem is only the first step. Actually committing to improving self love is the next and it's okay if it's at my own pace.
Thank you both for your work
Fellow "boring" sensitive soul here sending love to both. ❤
You got conned. She's an actress.
@@neodonkeywhy u say that?
This is crazy episode 😍. Loved it. Thanks Julien for sharing it. And Kudus to the Lady. She is Fabulously amazing ❤
She is so brave, this vulnerability is inspiring, she is radiant, she look smart...
Some people relate to you much lady, you are perfect enough for me. 🙌🙌🧿❤
I think a lot of our self-esteem is a result of the way our parents relate and talk to us. And the damage it does to us when it all goes south and the years that follow trying to find the acceptance and love which was missing. But it could also be as a a result of a bad marriage with the wrong partner as well. Thanks to this beautiful and courages lady, we can see first hand how she mirrors our own struggles and lends reality to it. ❤🤗
So brave!! She’s so worried about what other people think,but they all think she’s amazing and they’re happy it’s not them up there. Beautiful woman ❤ it takes a lot of guts to be seen.
It's also about what other people thought of her in the past, not just people in the room. It's a validating experience, but over time even a disapproving audience will not make her as tense anymore, when she loves herself.
She did so good going up there and being vulnerable. I’m speechless at how much this resonates with me
Just "good" is an understatement.
That was fantastic. I cried more than she did. I felt like that was me up there in the front of the room. Thank you for sharing this, and to your participant for having the courage to open herself up to you and the audience. A year later and her bravery is still making an impact.
Wow this made me cry a lot and helped me so much. I've done a lot of inner work and I am so proud of the improvement I've made, but I know I'm not fully where I want to be yet. This video gave me exactly the reassurance I needed to keep going because it can get very tiring to do this sort of work all the time, especially if you deal with mental illness. But I know I've establiahed a foundation that will keep carrying me through this journey of life from here on out, there is no going back. This video gave me so much hope. Thank you to this man and this woman. So much truth and love was shown here.
Acceptance. That's what we all want, and what we must give ourselves.
Out of all gurus ( most of them fake) Julien is truly a breath of fresh air. He's different, he really and deeply understands human nature more than most greatest therapists and psychologists out there. Instantly subbed! Great material please keep them coming Julien.
I agree. I would also add coaches Craig Kenneth and Doctor K to the list. All three have been of great help to me. Julien regarding self-expression, Doctor K regarding habits and behaviors, and Craig's channel regarding cultivating healthy relationships. For anyone looking for more good channels that teach a lot and are available for free, I'd strongly recommend those.
Massively fake.
The way this woman is so open and brave to fully put herself out to the world like this is very beautiful. Her eyes tell a thousand stories and are also very capturing. Much love to this lady ❤👏💪
She seems so lovely and intelligent, I hope she learns to see herself in the same way.
She is so beautiful both inside and out. I'm sad she hasnt known that.
I cried. To her, not that you need my validation. You are beautiful, physically. But I felt like I just wanted to give you a hug. From the glimpse I saw, I would love to hang out with you. I think you're wonderful, and we're all going through self-doubt at times. But I hope you're doing better now.
I'm literally crying. Perhaps she spoke for many of us 🙏🏼✨️
I admire her bravery and relate to her so much. I hate that her support system failed her so deeply and genuinely hope she finds the way to make space to be her beautiful self - big small quiet loud - to be good enough. Im sending her so much love.
The work you do julien is important and debunk alot of shit from the self improvement space that say to become extraverted, you acknowledge that it is also ok to be introvert, huge respect julien
She is sooo WONDERFUL 😭❤️
Man, to see where that brave soul must be at today!! Proud of you that day, and can only imagine the world transforming love you are giving yourself no matter what level it may be!! ❤🔥🔥🔥
I just recently found Julien and have watched soooo many videos. As other comments have said, self-love, self-awareness, and being yourself, free expression is very rare these days and very difficult for all of us at times.
Truly doing gods work Julien, helping so many people with these seminars and the content, certainly helping me discover some things and lessons about myself which I am ever grateful for.
Honestly, some of the best work with people I have ever seen, amazing content, thank you all
Keep loving yourselves so much that life is but a joyful playground
Thank you so much! 🙏
Only minutes in and youve made an excellent point. We strive for an abundance of approval but when we get it, we realize its only a temporary bandage for a deeper wound. Unfortunately, some might not get the opportunity to see that approval is not what they’re actually looking for
What's so beautiful about this session is you can see in her mimic that she has a social filter for her internal voice. She doesn't want to bother anyone with her internal critic, but yet allows this critic inside her head. This voice creates the distance and dissaproval she experience with others. It"s time to replace this voice with positive feedback about yourself and your experiences.
Also, I just wrote this comment to remind myself we think a lot-a-like. Thank you for putting your vulnerability on stage, you're brave!
“People would have loved me, or loved me more”
That’s when the tears came
What an amazing soul this woman has! Not only is she amazingly beautiful , but I can sense she has so much genuine love to give. You are so deserving of all the love available to you. God has just as wonderful person for you as you are! If you ever need a friend I’d love to be that friend.
You got fooled by an actress.,