Uncle Gene's Class Action Park | Castle Super Beast Clips

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 เม.ย. 2022
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ความคิดเห็น • 324

  • @TomboTime
    @TomboTime ปีที่แล้ว +44

    Being kicked out of 80s Wall Street for fraud is like being kicked out of hell because Satan thought you were too fucked up

  • @BTM8109
    @BTM8109 2 ปีที่แล้ว +580

    Tryin to make the mother of all theme parks here, Jack.

    • @LightningZerker
      @LightningZerker 2 ปีที่แล้ว +134

      Can't fret over every broken bone!

    • @bigbrowski410
      @bigbrowski410 2 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      Not when you’re “controlling the action” right? What would you know about action

    • @mortimerwake2974
      @mortimerwake2974 2 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      You weren't dropped 50 feet to the ground from a water slide park. You've never broken your spine. You don't know what it's like to barely survive driving drunk on the highway in a rewired go kart at 60mph at the age of 13

    • @shadowrath2532
      @shadowrath2532 2 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      But you did survive! Through sheer force of will, following your own ideology of fun, with your own two hands, you dominated the park!

    • @cobra29935
      @cobra29935 2 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      And now, I'll dominant yours.

  • @BigM33100
    @BigM33100 2 ปีที่แล้ว +299

    Uncle Gene’s ‘Engineer’ Oath: “Fuck ‘dem kids.”

    • @ruikirisame1744
      @ruikirisame1744 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      he legit went "fuck around and find out. test your luck, kid"

    • @Kinzokugia
      @Kinzokugia 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      "Hey guys, I saw this movie over the weekend and it gave me ideas for the new ride. Ever seen 'Watership Down?'"

    • @mortimerwake2974
      @mortimerwake2974 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I thought that was the Bishop's Oath?

    • @charleswisconsin9196
      @charleswisconsin9196 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@mortimerwake2974 you're the first person to ever make that kind of joke.

    • @mortimerwake2974
      @mortimerwake2974 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@charleswisconsin9196 I think it bears reuse

  • @vistea1
    @vistea1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +600

    "Woolie, have you ever heard the engineer ritual?"
    "No, but I've heard of OSHA."
    That blunt response from Woolie had me crackling out loud for a good few seconds.

    • @Radicalweegee
      @Radicalweegee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      I was at work when i heard that part and some co workers heard my snort laugh from down the hall ... it was only a single second of ugly laughter but it was kinda funny in hindsight

    • @BTM8109
      @BTM8109 2 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      The machine spirit must be appeased

    • @kylekillgannon
      @kylekillgannon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Woolie acting like he's ever been remotely close to a job where he could see OSHA slacking

    • @tarfielarchelone2674
      @tarfielarchelone2674 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @@kylekillgannon I'm something of an engineer myself... watched my coworker balance a 16ft ladder on a plank across two pipes so that he could change a ballast with the power still on.... 4 days after our osha training lol

    • @charleswisconsin9196
      @charleswisconsin9196 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      i've heard of NASA, but i don't think anyone should trust me to get somebody to space.

  • @theotherjared9824
    @theotherjared9824 2 ปีที่แล้ว +277

    I love how Woolie keeps calling him "Uncle Gene" like he earned Woolie's respect and the honorific is his crown.

    • @Mr.Faust3
      @Mr.Faust3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      It was what the employees called him

    • @PatchtheReaper99
      @PatchtheReaper99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      Well yeah. Woolie had to work hard to kill one guy on the football field. Gene was practically getting paid to put kids in the dirt

    • @fernandozavaletabustos205
      @fernandozavaletabustos205 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Oji-Sama!

    • @Hamun002
      @Hamun002 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      In America, our most respected people are conmen. So yes, Woolie has a respect. its a respect borne out of fear and awe

    • @gingermcgingin4106
      @gingermcgingin4106 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @Hamun002
      But Woolie's Canadian (unless he lied about that too)

  • @TwenteeEight
    @TwenteeEight 2 ปีที่แล้ว +412

    I remember hearing about Action Park as an adult, and thinking “how could anyone go there? Especially with this rep?” I suddenly remembered when I busted my lip on a water slide at a shitty water park as a kid. Turns out Action Park eventually turned into Mountain Creek Waterpark. And I went. And I got hurt lmao

    • @alcaz2924
      @alcaz2924 2 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Yeah the only thing I don't like the documentary was how they were saying it was only dangerous in the 80's and 90's but i went in the early 2000's and got a concussion, almost died multiple times,
      once on a slide the water pressure was way too high so i was almost getting thrown out of the tube so i sacrificed my hand and arm skin to slow down, that wasn't fun.
      The colorado river ride was still crazy dangerous, the wave pool was still a death trap. it's crazy.

    • @IronicHavoc
      @IronicHavoc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@alcaz2924 2000s was bad too just not quite as extreme or well documented

    • @music79075
      @music79075 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wait really??

    • @music79075
      @music79075 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@alcaz2924 when you say sacrifice... did you lose them?

    • @alcaz2924
      @alcaz2924 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@music79075 "sacrificed my hand and arm skin" yeah I lost a few layers of skin. had to go to the first aid tent.

  • @ClasticOne
    @ClasticOne 2 ปีที่แล้ว +500

    I thought this was a game at first and was like "oh, so basically roller coaster tycoon". The dawning realization that this was an actual real physical location was a surreal experience.

    • @MajorCrafter
      @MajorCrafter 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      When I saw the title I thought Google was trying to sue Gene Park over his review of Stadia and it being responsible for poor financial sales

    • @williejones6446
      @williejones6446 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Your comment is killing me with the thought. I cant stop laughing.

    • @iller3
      @iller3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      I grew up in the 80's... this was actually completely believable. We had an "Alpine Park" much like this where I lived. Even Toys from the 70's and 80's were rife with Darwin awards, ya'll missed a real "Character Building" era

    • @Jacrispy223
      @Jacrispy223 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Class action part of the title made sense then i bet

    • @SixArmedSweater
      @SixArmedSweater 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You can get away with a lot with Mob protection.

  • @TheAtlasReview
    @TheAtlasReview 2 ปีที่แล้ว +113

    Woolie did a great job as a hype man for what is essentially a theme park that has been taken over by the Joker.

  • @Gespenst38
    @Gespenst38 2 ปีที่แล้ว +159

    The sheer level of lethality from these rides and attractions sounds like this park came from Super Jail.

  • @Shnibbledacat
    @Shnibbledacat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +100

    If Cave Johnson owns an amusement park instead of a science lab

    • @francescolombardi3438
      @francescolombardi3438 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      no lemons can save you from the action in this park

    • @goopyman2865
      @goopyman2865 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Gotta clear the mantis men out of the water slide

  • @DoctorHomicide
    @DoctorHomicide 2 ปีที่แล้ว +134

    It’s a shame that Woolie didn’t mention that the Park had so many accidents they had permeant ambulances on standby to to rush those who got hurt straight to the hospital

  • @IndoorSitup
    @IndoorSitup 2 ปีที่แล้ว +243

    Man, the Defunctland video really only scratched the surface of how insane this shit was.

    • @Ganmorg
      @Ganmorg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      Yeah, makes me wish he’d redo the video in his modern long-form style. I wanna see fastpass levels of detail

    • @Pak_Industrial
      @Pak_Industrial 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @@Ganmorg fastpass video was great. But honestly with the documentary I'm not sure if defunctland feels the need to redo it.

  • @flightgravity7483
    @flightgravity7483 2 ปีที่แล้ว +245

    The most shocking part of the documentary for me outside of the gross negligence in the aftermath of the park’s first death was the part about the wave pool. They said the water was an absolute murky concoction of suntan lotion, human waste, run off from an adjacent muddy hill, and gore from people’s wounds. Just a chaos soup.

    • @IndoorSitup
      @IndoorSitup 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      dross

    • @kapkant6197
      @kapkant6197 2 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      Doom: Eternal (2020) Super Gore Nest

    • @kaijuultimax9407
      @kaijuultimax9407 2 ปีที่แล้ว +103

      The origin of scarlet rot

    • @morbidabyss12
      @morbidabyss12 2 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Remnants of blightcon2021

    • @flightgravity7483
      @flightgravity7483 2 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      @@kaijuultimax9407 Action Park: The Caelid of amusement parks.

  • @Ironman1o1
    @Ironman1o1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    Uncle Gene was super upset they coudn't finish the Live ammo tag arena before it got shut down.

  • @kattastic9999
    @kattastic9999 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    An article came out recently about a ride Gene decided to not go with after testing revealed it to be too dangerous. And I want you to think about that for a second.

  • @ElectricGears
    @ElectricGears 2 ปีที่แล้ว +134

    An important note about that "non-descript" iron ring Pat mentioned is that it's made from a piece of metal that was pulled from collapsed structure that killed people.
    This might be apocryphal, but it is a story that is commonly told about the iron ring. If I was in charge it defiantly wouldn't be, and I would be sure to find the exact beam that was undersized and use that one.

    • @nineballmk2
      @nineballmk2 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      it came from a bridge in minnesota

  • @NinjaxShadowXx
    @NinjaxShadowXx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +419

    Heihachi would have thrown Kazuya into Action Park instead of a cliff and if he survived then he would be proud

    • @cerdgold225
      @cerdgold225 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Yeah, I think Kazuya would rather face the cliff instead

    • @tailedgates9
      @tailedgates9 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Nah man, Class Action Park is just Heihachi Land. XD

    • @KnightLineArtYT
      @KnightLineArtYT 2 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      @@tailedgates9 "What do you mean bears and Kangaroos make for bad employees" - Heihachi

    • @tailedgates9
      @tailedgates9 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@KnightLineArtYT Kuma would totally be the best employee there. Lol

    • @goodninji8
      @goodninji8 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Tekken 10
      Amusement Armageddon

  • @saddlegoose
    @saddlegoose ปีที่แล้ว +36

    Uncle Gene's son did a Reddit AMA a couple years ago, and I'm not sure I've ever seen a more stunning case of rose-tinted glasses than that comment section.

    • @kekula69
      @kekula69 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      "uhmmm acshually i never got hurt so what's the problem??????? maybe those kids should've just not died?????"

  • @Samuel-yf6pl
    @Samuel-yf6pl 2 ปีที่แล้ว +276

    Is there ANYTHING more enjoyable than a CSB segment talking about some insane piece of media where one of the two doesn't know it and we get to react to the insanity along with them as it's explained? Absolute joy. Helps that they're both incredible storytellers

    • @sean-michaelmallard4956
      @sean-michaelmallard4956 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      This and the fyre fest one are probably my favorites

    • @Feoral
      @Feoral ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Only thing better is the look on Woolie's face when some famous person goes hyper-racist to the point of absurdity and obliterates their career. Its such a mirthful look.

  • @Tyberes
    @Tyberes 2 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    I like how quickly we gloss over "yea there was a bang shack"

    • @trustypatches4042
      @trustypatches4042 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Id be more surprised if you told me about an amusement park staffed exclusively by teenagers with no supervision and they didn't have somewhere that they go to have sex and smoke weed

    • @FirstGameFreak1000
      @FirstGameFreak1000 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      BANK shack, if you've worked in parks you know that this is where money is counted and handled.

  • @Teradyne87
    @Teradyne87 2 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Action Park was an episode of Ed Edd & Eddy made real.

  • @reco5able
    @reco5able 2 ปีที่แล้ว +138

    Action park feels like one second away from creating a war crime

    • @zhentable
      @zhentable 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Remember legally it's not a war crime if you do it to your own people

    • @lazyyoutubename3468
      @lazyyoutubename3468 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Real life itchy and scratchy land.

    • @sailorshark3334
      @sailorshark3334 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      They’re putting heavy water in the wave pool

  • @abbywilberg1087
    @abbywilberg1087 2 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    Loving pat's sheer childlike glee at every new detail about uncle gene and the park. No wonder his favorite disco character is everart

  • @DR3ADER1
    @DR3ADER1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    The most comical part about the CFS (Again, it abbreviates to "Can't Fucking Swim" because the lifeguards were young drunkards) Mark of Shaming is that Action Park's main draws were low-income youths and families of varying European ancestries (mainly German and Polish as Action Park would promote Oktoberfests and Polish Festivals, which would exacerbate the alcohol problems within the staff and visitor circles) who live in an area of New Jersey that was several kilometres away from the coastline and any safe lakes, or in Geographic terms: Northern Appalachia. Meaning that they never had the chance to learn, let alone afford any lessons in the basic acts of swimming and NOT panicking when submerged in cold water.

  • @ffffffffROTHY
    @ffffffffROTHY 2 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    Their slogan wasn't wrong, 'There's nothing in the world like Action Park'

  • @Argascend
    @Argascend 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    action park is what if the child annihilating zipline thought that child annihilation was a good level of safety

  • @StoryTaylor43
    @StoryTaylor43 2 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    Class action park sounds like the island that Pinocchio went to that turned the misbehaving boys into jackasses.

    • @chazzwozzio
      @chazzwozzio ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Pleasure island? It's a cigar vendor and smash room away from it

    • @crimsondynamo615
      @crimsondynamo615 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@chazzwozziouncle Gene couldn’t afford a guy who sounded like Popeye to give cigars to kids

  • @posteriorpepperoni
    @posteriorpepperoni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +205

    Uncle Gene sounds like the Senator Armstrong of theme parks
    Edit: oh my god, the cattle prod story,at this point he may as well start putting kids' brains into the waterslides

    • @GELTONZ
      @GELTONZ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +74

      I'M MAKING THE MOTHER OF ALL WATERSLIDES HERE, JACK! CAN'T FRET OVER EVERY LAWSUIT!

    • @lexofexcel886
      @lexofexcel886 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Now we need Gianni to dub a commercial.

    • @theotherjared9824
      @theotherjared9824 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Literally "Fuck all these limp dick lawyers and chicken shit bureaucrats!"

    • @Gettles
      @Gettles 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      I think the cattle prod story is when it flips into It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. I can just see Mac and Charlie concocting that exact scenario

    • @posteriorpepperoni
      @posteriorpepperoni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@Gettles absolutely,and then the cattle prod actually worked but Charlie didn't even feel it so they accidentally shock a guy

  • @inferno232
    @inferno232 2 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    To those interested, there's also a podcast called 'Behind the Bastards" which did a full episode on Action Park. It's not as long or detailed as a full special but it gets into the dirt on a lot of this. A fun detail that Woolie didn't mention: one of the draws of Action Park's rides was, to Uncle Gene, the fact that some, like the Tarzan Swing, would cause young women and girls to lose their tops on the way down.
    It's a fucking miracle this man's body count didn't soar into the double digits.

    • @felixdaniels37
      @felixdaniels37 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      It probably DID, and we just never heard about it. The current body count was just the shit Gene couldn't cover up.

    • @RipOffProductionsLLC
      @RipOffProductionsLLC ปีที่แล้ว +1

      "All da Boyz will come to see da girls loose their tops, this is a great plan!"

  • @DocDelray
    @DocDelray 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Action Park could only ever exist in the 80's. The decade of zero fucks given.

    • @thatguy3332
      @thatguy3332 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It was the best decade of my life

    • @DocDelray
      @DocDelray 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@thatguy3332 I wish I had been there for more than half of it

  • @Mr.Faust3
    @Mr.Faust3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Uncle gene would probably use a behelit for the ultimate action park

  • @portalmaster1127
    @portalmaster1127 2 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    As someone who has a family that directly delt in the carnie business for 8 years of my own personal life. Action park SOUNDS like the kind of place that the local ride companies we traveled with from fairground to fairground would avoid.

  • @ngmajora6986
    @ngmajora6986 2 ปีที่แล้ว +70

    Is this THE Action Park, fucking Lazy River filled with Water Moccasins Action Park? Also the decapitation thing was Schlitterbahn IIRC a different water park

  • @Flitterquest
    @Flitterquest ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Jersey boy here, my Mama and my Stepfather both have been to Action Park at different times in their lives and they both said it was "okay" which has always kinda contextualized this deathcult of a themepark, y'know just because it'll kill you doesn't mean it'll be fun and thrilling, not only was it dangerous and it could kill you, it also kinda sucked.

  • @PS1-Hagrid
    @PS1-Hagrid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    Action Park truly is something ripped out of Springfield.

  • @pearvsorange
    @pearvsorange 2 ปีที่แล้ว +91

    My father has actually been to this park! We watched the documentary together and he explained to me every ride that he's been on. He explained how TERRIBLE and funny the whole experience was

  • @centuronstar8688
    @centuronstar8688 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    I've never heard of this place until now. The water rides and pools sound like absolute nightmares as someone who worked as a Lifeguard for 6 years. The major thing that was instilled into us with Lifeguard Training was taking preventive measures to ensure that any possible bad things that could happen will not happen. Even seemingly small things like someone running near the pool is something that should be taken seriously and should be stopped as soon as you see it.

  • @tokiwartooth9935
    @tokiwartooth9935 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Not even an 80's movie, this whole story unironically sounds like the plot to an early-mid 00's anti-establishment slacker comedy film where a pair of college drop outs are given free reign to manage a theme park and somehow portrayed to be the "good guys" up against a stuffy entrenched legitimate rival park and regulators. It could star Justin Long and Jonah Hill, maybe the actor who played McLovin in Superbad as some sort of clearly underaged worker that they're paying under the table. Guest appearances by Johnny Knoxville or Tom Green.

  • @rickdaniel7341
    @rickdaniel7341 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    glad to know “Blackjack And Hookers” still gets play

  • @patanu
    @patanu 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    To quote the trailer "No one should be the SECOND person, to die in a wave pool"

  • @franzhopper7631
    @franzhopper7631 2 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    Craziest part is that the deaths and injuries only enticed people to go there more

    • @BigSisterNeko
      @BigSisterNeko 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      thrill seekers

    • @charleswisconsin9196
      @charleswisconsin9196 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      "i survived Action Park and all i got was this lousy T-shirt. and a severed arm"

    • @cobra29935
      @cobra29935 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I remember this Denis Leary bit where recounts how the sales of viagra went up when "death" was put on the bottle as one of the possible symptoms.

  • @kharyrobertson3579
    @kharyrobertson3579 2 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    So basically, what if Joe exotic loved roller coasters more than he loved tigers?

  • @manticorephoenix
    @manticorephoenix 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Makes ya almost feel sorry for people who live in Joysee, for a reason other than they already living in Joysee

  • @disk3001
    @disk3001 2 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    God this is one of those examples of "truth is way stranger than fiction"
    Sounds like something out of a "final stage of capitalism" satire(i.e. Outer Worlds) only somehow way crazier

    • @eggbreakerdotexe
      @eggbreakerdotexe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Like we're not nearing that point anyway.

    • @jasonwalker4003
      @jasonwalker4003 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Because in satire it's made up people who only exist to be victims. This is real people, most of them are still alive today. Most of them.

    • @charleswisconsin9196
      @charleswisconsin9196 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@eggbreakerdotexe oh boy, one of you types. oh the world is so bad, this is the worst time to be alive, the world's about to end.
      like you types haven't been saying that since we invented the wheel.
      tell me more about how newspapers are corrupting the youth. because people really said that. i was there. im 4000 years old. don't test me.

    • @lazyyoutubename3468
      @lazyyoutubename3468 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I immediately thought of Nuka World or the Amusement Park in New Vegas.

  • @djdexcat
    @djdexcat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I'm always reminded of those "Roller Coaster Tycoon Death Parks" people would inevitably make.

    • @lexofexcel886
      @lexofexcel886 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      You just know that they would have tried to make Mister Bone's Endless Ride.

    • @FuryXDMGS
      @FuryXDMGS 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Well at least in ThrillVille everyone gets free parachutes and grappling hooks when they pay their roller coaster tickets

  • @orangelazarus86
    @orangelazarus86 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    New Jersian here. Can confirm, Action Park is 100% a Jersey story.

  • @jacobp7037
    @jacobp7037 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    OK but that oath is some 40k shit

  • @jamesleung2450
    @jamesleung2450 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I grew up in northern NJ in the 80’s and 90’s, I count myself lucky for only getting road rash on my forearms and shins after flying off the alpine slide

  • @effluviah7544
    @effluviah7544 2 ปีที่แล้ว +153

    Oh, shit, you're gonna talk about Traction Park, which was my family's preferred name for it? HELL YEAH.
    Who wants to hear some stories about wildly unregulated half-assed dangerous rural parks in the North Eastern United States? Because I've seen some shit.
    Spoilers, Traction Park just got the spotlight. There's a good few of these local parks that still exist, and absolutely should not.
    Some are wonderful and glorious, and should be kept open forever as the last bastions of human joy in this miserable world. For example, Conneaut Lake Park. Got slapped in the head on my way into the haunted house, and I fucking loved it. I love those people, and their frightening wooden rollercoaster. Visit this park if you live in the area, please. It's genuinely the best ever. I will defend this park forever, I'm serious. It's incredibly fun and the vibe is simultaneously borderline haunted yet extremely chill and a pleasant, fun experience. It's probably like, a little haunted. But they have a haunted house so it's fine, it's like, Scooby Doo level haunted, not like, Guillermo del Toro film level haunted. 10/10 local park.
    Most rural/lesser known local parks, however, are genuinely terrifying. Oh god. Lemme just say: Waterparks. It's always the fucking waterparks.
    EDIT: If it's located in Appalachia, there is a 70% chance you'll die. If you don't die, you will get hurt, or you will witness some kind of incident. Otherwise, kinda pleasant. But only if you like watching people get arrested on drunk and disorderly charges in front of their kids or someone else's kids. See: Anything that occurs along the rapids in Tennessee, which is almost solely "monitored" (it's not monitored lol) by local tourist attraction companies.
    I got fucked up last time I went to the rapids, and I used to be a lifeguard. I'm telling you, shit's dangerous, but nobody cares because fuck it, it's like a lazy river! Which breaks out into dangerous rapids here and there, but like, it's fine. Follow the map! Which you can't do because there's no signage, and if you're a weak swimmer there is a non-zero chance you'll get pulled into far more dangerous areas than you intended, unless some tour guide or whatever happens to be there to save your ass. Enter the river, roll the die. Hell yeah, rural entertainment.

    • @AspiringDevil
      @AspiringDevil 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Yes sir I love those stories and those parks. I was confused when Woolie mentioned the fish and snakes because I had remind myself they're Canadian yuppies. In the Appalachian mountains I'm usually happy to see black snakes in the water, they keep the cotton mouths away. I wish we had Salmon in the one I used to go to. Unlike cat fish and hellbenders, Salmon rarely try to eat a children.

    • @anachronologist2017
      @anachronologist2017 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thanks for the tip. Conneaut Lake Park just got added to my bucket list

    • @effluviah7544
      @effluviah7544 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@AspiringDevil The snakes are pretty common, yeah. A little further south (like TN and below, East Coast) you also sometimes get Racer snakes hanging around, although I personally almost got killed by a Coral Snake once and there were also tons of Rattlesnakes in the same area, so it's a mixed bag. Fully agree that anything that keeps Cottonmouths away is always a bonus. Salmon are also totally fine, might be a little bigger than some people realise so that might freak some people out, but I vastly prefer them to the Tarpon fish that used to kill like five people a year across certain Southern entertainment locations...

    • @effluviah7544
      @effluviah7544 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@anachronologist2017 No worries, you'll have a great time! I love that park. It very rarely has many visitors, so waiting times for anything tend to be pretty short, with the terrifying wooden rollercoaster being one of the only things you might have to wait for at all-- Even then, very little time is spent waiting around, and you have lots of other local stuff to do in the area so it's no problem if you get through all of what you want to do/ride there in one day.
      The nearby lake is a great place to hang out, walk around, enjoy that a bit if weather allows, and there's a legit home owned custard/ice cream place nearby which has maybe the best fucking custard I've ever had in my life. Highly recommend asking someone for directions if you want to check it out, it kicks ass and makes for a great snack towards the end of a day. It's not too far so you're still in proximity to everything, so it's worth grabbing some custard there and then going ahead with whatever else you might want to do.
      The lack of visitors and relatively minimal staff at the park lends to a really relaxed and fun, almost exploratory vibe (it has a very Scooby Doo energy to it), and it also means the staff that IS there can have fun too, which creates a really nice and friendly environment as the staff aren't constantly having to rush all the time. I found every staff member I interacted with to be genuinely chill and professional, did a better job at checking ride safety bars/etc. than several of the larger parks I've been to, and are willing to really engage with visitors and make it a good time.
      I'm sure some people would think of it as a run down park with a single major attraction ride (the wooden coaster), but I'm serious, I was surprised at just how much I enjoyed the experience and I even went back a couple more times while I was in the area purely because it was a truly unique local park which manages to feel both haunted and very friendly, perfect for a new experience for park enthusiasts who want something very different from the usual "big budget large park" vibe, as well as casual theme park visitors who might just go to a park every once in a while or once every couple years.
      The nearby hotel area is also very nice, and there is a historic hotel/lodge nearby which I heard from multiple people was a very lovely place to stay, so I haven't been there myself but it was highly recommended by others who were actively staying there at the time.
      Best time to visit is spring or early autumn in my experience, obviously summer is the higher volume visitor period but honestly it still doesn't get all that packed, so if summer peak time is the only time you might have to visit, I'd say that would still be a fairly enjoyable experience in all likelihood. I think part of the charm is how few people are there, so autumn is when it's emptiest and at it's most Scooby Doo, if that's the type of vibe you're looking for.
      I fucking love this park, the staff, location, rides, and overall experience are all fun as hell, and I really hope you get to check it out someday!

    • @AspiringDevil
      @AspiringDevil 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@effluviah7544Jesus yeah Tarpon are terrible. We got Rattlers in my areas too at least give you heads up unlike other threats.
      Everybody understands why alligator snapping turtles are dangerous but the soft shell turtle is often overlooked but they are more common in my area and way more aggressive. They are the blight of fishermen everywhere.
      TLDR mothet nature is psycho bitch who some how gets good press.

  • @thestic6349
    @thestic6349 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    These days the park would be called Libertarian Wonderland.

  • @tarfielarchelone2674
    @tarfielarchelone2674 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    My favorite part of the documentary is Donald Trump saying it sounds like a good idea going to see for himself and just noping the fuck out.
    (Also watched this with my mom and she reminded me that I tried to go at 6 and she had to follow my friends dads car because I lied about what park we were going to)

  • @shinrahunter
    @shinrahunter 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I actually paused this video half way through to go watch Class Action Park, I was not disappointed. I have to say that as a child of the 80's, Colorado river rapids looks hella fun.

  • @powerfist1340
    @powerfist1340 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I would like to note, The cartoon Megas XLR might in fact have been too kind to Jersey.

  • @Gettles
    @Gettles 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I went there maybe a year before it closed. Even at 9, I remember thinking that it had an oddly strong wave pool. The other thing I clearly remember is when we were leaving we passed over the exit of the Colorado River Ride and there was some bald back dude getting off with a massive welt on his head.

  • @fenix0seraph
    @fenix0seraph 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I wasn't paying attention to the first parts of this convo so I thought the boys were talking about Gene Park making a park at first.

  • @TheFlamingDoh2
    @TheFlamingDoh2 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I watched the documentary and HOO BOY. It does not shy away from the fact that people died. Woolie made it sound way more fun.

  • @Deepdarkbasement
    @Deepdarkbasement 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It’s funny how at the end when they were talking about traveling carnivals… Action Park just sounded like a Stationary Traveling Carnival

  • @MadForHatters
    @MadForHatters 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Action Park is so unreal it sounds like an urban legend. I was shocked when every single story about the place wound up being true.

  • @mrwri
    @mrwri ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Sir, I don't use the word "hero" often, but you are the greatest hero in American History.

  • @Crembaw
    @Crembaw 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    There really is nothing in the world like Action Park.

    • @joedatius
      @joedatius 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      probably for a good reason lmao

  • @BigFingerRo
    @BigFingerRo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I wonder how much this could be related to those bugs in The New World, and how someone said "yeah this is the future of games, where the bugs _are_ the content!". What if this is Uncle Gene's dream? To create a place where the thrill is that you might actually die, as opposed to other parks where you get _safely_ dropped from tall heights and whatnot, so you're never in any real danger (at least in most instances). Traction Park is _trve freedom_ . I wouldn't be surprised in the least to hear there were plans for a ring for just straight up gladiatorial combat. Or maybe a brothel somehow merged with a water slide.

    • @Champiness
      @Champiness 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      About that:
      “The Gladiator Challenge attraction, loosely based on the television series ‘American Gladiators’, opened in 1992. It allowed guests to compete against other guests in an obstacle course and against park-employed ‘Gladiators’ in jousting matches. Former bodybuilders Michael and Vince Mancuso designed the attraction, and the employees that guests would compete against in the jousting matches were found by scouting local gyms.
      The matches could lead to real violence. On one occasion, a guest who felt the gladiator he contended against had been too rough, striking him frequently on the head with the padded end of his pugil stick, returned to the attraction with some of his friends in an effort to exact retribution. The gladiator called in support of his own, and eventually a brawl involving several dozen people broke out. The Vernon police had to be called in to restore order.”

    • @BigFingerRo
      @BigFingerRo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@Champiness I can't describe to you the weird joy that I felt reading this. I fucking reached Nirvana. So I wasn't wrong, then. Uncle Gene just wanted Return to Monke Land. All that needs for full on licentiousness-heaven, final stage capitalism is to allow people to get sponsorships and have the gladiators go "THOSE OF US ABOUT TO DIE SALUTE NORDVPN!" or some shit like that. WILD shit. Please, for the love of god, tell me I wasn't far off the mark with the brothel-slide.

    • @Champiness
      @Champiness 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@BigFingerRo I mean there was the Designated Teenager Bang Shack but I don’t think there were any attempts to gamify that during the park’s lifetime unfortunately

    • @Cthululululu
      @Cthululululu 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@BigFingerRo Fucking -Imagine-.
      Gladiatorial Deathmatches with corporate sponsors

    • @BigFingerRo
      @BigFingerRo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@Cthululululu If the thing that represented wasn't so inmensely soul-wrenching, it'd be the sickest shit ever. Get some good designs on those armors, place the logos in a not cringe-inducing location, bingo bango bongo, you have a sport!

  • @RandgrisAlmark
    @RandgrisAlmark 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have vivid flashbacks of a scene from King of the Hill.
    Lucky and Dale are fucking around and Lucky hurts his back. So Dale goes to call his insurance and the second phone rings next to him.
    Always made me laugh but holy shit it's real.

  • @danherondraws
    @danherondraws 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I love Pat's enlightment on this whole trainwreck of a journey. Man, this was an amazing shitshow!
    XD

  • @powerprotoman
    @powerprotoman 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    i think woolie would love the channel defunct land its full of stories on rides and amusement parks and is where i first heard about action park
    its also home of everyones favorite game "will i get jump scared by Michael Eisner"

    • @djdexcat
      @djdexcat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      The answer is always "yes", no matter how confident you are that he has nothing to do with the video subject.

  • @Porterhaus94
    @Porterhaus94 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This waterpark has the same energy as the 1986 film "Class of Nuke 'Em High"

  • @ballerswagbro9k611
    @ballerswagbro9k611 2 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    Uncle Gene is just on that Sigma Male grindset XD
    "Making the mother of all Theme Parks OSHA, can't worry over a few eggs."

  • @haski002
    @haski002 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    I can definitely recommend the Defunctland video, in case you don't want to bother with HBO or just want a quicker overview of the crazy shit that went down.

  • @luciendolo6604
    @luciendolo6604 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Dude Action Park was the best! Always had a blast going there as a kid! The kind of fun you can only have with zero concern for safety or sanity!

  • @KeroKaminaX
    @KeroKaminaX 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    When woolie first described this on stream I thought he was talking about some new RollerCoaster Tycoon indie game

  • @Ophidia_Lore
    @Ophidia_Lore 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Resident of Jersey here, yeap. We tell legends of it and lots of us youngins that didn't get to go want it to return. We are a garbage state of garbage people, and we like it that way

  • @thundergaming155
    @thundergaming155 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Uncle Gene Litterly said screw the rules I have money and opened a park without a care in the world.

  • @thehand7902
    @thehand7902 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    If anyone ever goes to the Wisconsin Dells I have only two words for you.
    Wizard. Quest.
    You'll understand when you get there.

  • @Phos9
    @Phos9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The go karts weren't karts, they were basically tiny actual race cars. They had suspension and downforce and actual differentials. They were actually up for auction a few years back.

  • @nervmeister
    @nervmeister 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    The website, Cracked first introduced me to this -human sacrifice citadel- "amusement park".

  • @bplup6419
    @bplup6419 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Went to Action Park when I was wee baby with my older brother. He broke his leg. Great time.

  • @ghouliethousandtrouser2905
    @ghouliethousandtrouser2905 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Natural Selection Park. Every city should have one.

  • @Mr.Faust3
    @Mr.Faust3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Action park sounds balls to the walls sick and something that would absolutely be a thing in the United States

  • @PoisonInc
    @PoisonInc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The last bit about a kids head being kicked off is real; it was a Batman ride.

  • @Jhylla81
    @Jhylla81 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Seeing the title half awake I had the mental image of Gene Park making a dangerous theme park through the whole video.

  • @UltimaKeyMaster
    @UltimaKeyMaster 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Damn, I was waiting for Woolie to namedrop Defunctland.
    AHAHA, PAT SOLVED THIS. THANK YOU, PAT.

  • @Comkill117
    @Comkill117 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Uncle Gene went and made his Rollercoaster Tycoon park irl. What a legend.

  • @Jgt612
    @Jgt612 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Seeing Pat’s new location is *jarring* especially given how bright it is.

  • @opossum_elysium
    @opossum_elysium 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Theme parks are indeed fuckin scary, you don't even have to be in the 80s for that. Growing up in the 2000s, I got a concussion in a similar looping waterslide that was poorly maintained and staffed, and I can recall multiple times I nearly died in a wave pool. Some from the waves, some from an adult standing on me unknowingly, and one from older teens literally attempting to drown me as they dominated the floating raft in the middle of the pool. It's kinda fuckin insane the shit the dangerous shit theme parks have always and still can get away with.

  • @sarcastic_alpaca
    @sarcastic_alpaca 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have heard Action park come up is various different podcast, videos and people from different genres games to cooking. And everytime it is a joy to hear people find out about Action Park and it's long ass lists of crimes and negligent staffing practices.

  • @tripps3631
    @tripps3631 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Recently went to a 'Spring Fling' carnival in my city.
    They had some headass that shot himself out of a cannon.

  • @sickmondo2333
    @sickmondo2333 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is my childhood home town. Literally 5 minutes away from Mountain Creek/Action park. Love that everyone is finding out about the madness 👌

  • @NoPantsBaby
    @NoPantsBaby 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    That park sounds like the best time a kid could ever have. Missing teeth? I'll grow new ones!

  • @kormael
    @kormael 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I’m getting real Cave Johnson/Aperture science vibes

  • @chakatBombshell
    @chakatBombshell 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I enjoy that this story has left Pat smiling the whole time from how purposely insane Action Park was.

  • @ValleDelSergio
    @ValleDelSergio 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The Defunctland video about Action Park is great

  • @nico6143
    @nico6143 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This sounds like an AnCap nightmare.
    Good fucking god

  • @SaraBanartist
    @SaraBanartist 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I've heard legend of this place growing up since I wasn't too far from Vernon. My folks went to this place in the 80s and apparently the stories are all 100% true.
    I went when I was a kid and it was called Mountain Creek, not knowing until YEARS later that the parks were one in the same.
    That Tarzan Swing was cold as hell.

  • @pathfindersavant3988
    @pathfindersavant3988 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Mono-Red energy

  • @brendanb2982
    @brendanb2982 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    But did Ja Rule know?

    • @patrickj994
      @patrickj994 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Nah man he was bamboozled.

    • @Swaggernaut64
      @Swaggernaut64 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Where is Ja!!!!

  • @SquirlNutssss
    @SquirlNutssss 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Uncle Gene playin Rollercoaster tycoon IRL

  • @Spacialvekter
    @Spacialvekter 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I knew a bit about Action Park from the Defunctland episode, but this got me to actually go watch the documentary. Good stuff. Lots more going on than I expected.

  • @justinhearst
    @justinhearst 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Man I'm really surprised you're just finding out about action Park

  • @ColeVecsion
    @ColeVecsion 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hmmm ok, I'm getting vague memories of this, i was a kid in the 80s from new york, i either knew people who went there or heard about it from somewhere, this is bringing up ancient memories the more I'm hearing it, very weird experience

  • @patchthelad
    @patchthelad 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    You decide your cash settlement at Class Action Park

  • @thebreakfastmegapowers3525
    @thebreakfastmegapowers3525 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    it is extra wild when you take a step back and remember that all of this live footage and evidence came from times when, up to the new millennium, film was expensive cameras were rare and the cost of converting that tape into any digital asset was astronomical. We live in a time as early as 2005 when cameras and video capability was FINALLY truly common among the public so the idea that mountains of visual evidence of this park was around made available and turned into commercials for broadcast is all forms of mystifying