Vulnerable Child - The core of the Schema Therapy model

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ส.ค. 2024
  • The Vulnerable Child is the centre of the Schema Mode Therapy model. We are old children, we have vulnerabilities, our emotions are real and we need to be compassionate to ourselves. Turning towards your vulnerability, reconnecting with your vulnerability is a key part of moving forward. Know your vulnerability and know your coping modes.
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ความคิดเห็น • 88

  • @PiGDoGAniMaL
    @PiGDoGAniMaL 18 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Acknowledging, sitting with, persevering.
    Rinse, and repeat. ❤it. So grateful.

  • @Andriy_322
    @Andriy_322 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    ''ULTIMATELY ITS ABOUT YOU LEARNING TO BE NICER TOWARD YOURSELF''

  • @beanie168
    @beanie168 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This is the best explanation and guide to working with schema's I've come across in 15 years.

  • @Thatsbannanas-d8c
    @Thatsbannanas-d8c 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    The sensations in my body are ginormous. I can’t imagine a child feeling this way. It’s a lot of struggle. .

  • @cadmantheaviator
    @cadmantheaviator 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Hello. I'm 1.5 years into Schema Therapy. Your video is a good descriptor of what it's like. I am learning to be nicer to myself. It does require perseverance, but I'm beginning to like myself. Faults and all. I enjoyed your video.

  • @cynthiab1659
    @cynthiab1659 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Ran across this .
    ACA 12 step program
    Outlines many of the same concepts !! adult children of alcoholics. It’s a fabulous program.

    • @elizab3341
      @elizab3341 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I just started ACA a month ago. Really profound moments already. Excited to start the program with a sponsor

  • @B3arAbl3
    @B3arAbl3 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Thank you for making this video, I learnt heaps

  • @chrisy6707
    @chrisy6707 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    The descriptions of detaching as a way to avoid difficult vulnerability was really helpful. Yes it feels very automatic and 'reflexive' to the point where it's very hard to catch. Thank you for an introduction to this work, I already feel a slight space to work with.

  • @jeffthompson9402
    @jeffthompson9402 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Dear Dr. O’Garr, I’m a therapist in the USA, and am reviewing this schema playlist again so I can best use your workbook with a patient. I’m sending the playlist to that patient as well. It’s such a great resource, and the materials are exceptional! Thank you for posting these, and for all your obvious hard work in making such materials available to us! Regards, Jeff Thompson, PhD, Yakima, WA, USA.

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You’re welcome. We’ve got a schema treatment pathway book in the works too so keep any eye out for that one

    • @jeffthompson9402
      @jeffthompson9402 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@thePSYCHcollective That was actually my next question! I’ll look forward to the book with great excitement!

  • @CoreySchmick444
    @CoreySchmick444 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I had to come to a lot of these realizations only after years of self-reflection and transformation. This really is at the forefront of known psychoanalysis. I applaud your efforts! Much love, Corey.

  • @Thinkfirsty
    @Thinkfirsty 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    You’re a great teacher Jess. Keep up the good work !

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thanks Rob. We’re looking forward to making some new videos soon.

  • @david-stewart
    @david-stewart 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I know this is off topic but that's a beautiful dress.

    • @ogiyonkelesebane9756
      @ogiyonkelesebane9756 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I like how she dresses

    • @Rumblingbelly
      @Rumblingbelly 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Basically anything will look good on you if you look that good.

  • @sharonv8957
    @sharonv8957 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Thank you so much for your generous contribution. Loving PSYCH collective!

  • @hidden_place
    @hidden_place 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    This channel is extremely good! Thanks a lot for your videos, you make everything sound so clear, so easy to understand. Lots of love❤️

  • @angieangel3090
    @angieangel3090 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    How many people know those words "If you don't stop crying I will give you something to cry about"
    How much better a place could the world be if no one has experienced of those words.
    It was a good video.

  • @kristinweberg2773
    @kristinweberg2773 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Thank you so much. So helpful. The inner child in me will absolutely benefit from this information 💞

  • @maryhookey1794
    @maryhookey1794 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you so much for such a great introduction to this therapy. It is so real to me and you have really exposed the issue.

  • @emmapinn5216
    @emmapinn5216 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    But seriously, this is a great resource. Thank you

  • @Daniela.Mccaffrey
    @Daniela.Mccaffrey ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Fantastic explanation

  • @fernando49404
    @fernando49404 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I know that this Chanel Is so good; I don't understand all but, here am i.

  • @Whathuh86
    @Whathuh86 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    When "speaking" to that vulnerable part of myself I usually speak in first person plural (we/us) because it helps to maintain awareness of both the vulnerable child and healthy adult both cognitively and physically. I can think about the vulnerable emotion while also feeling it physically while also having compassionate thoughts and feeling physically soothed. It is a more integrating experience; however, I wonder if it's strange because I am one person. Is it strange?

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Nope.

    • @treasurechest2951
      @treasurechest2951 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This is a great idea and is exactly like internal family systems therapy. It helps you and that part separate, which regulates you better.

    • @stopbunsen
      @stopbunsen 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I use "we" as well. It's validating all those parts of myself with one word, giving them a voice and also, like you say, it's integrative. I think it's a really positive thing

  • @lilyannarose
    @lilyannarose 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Really helpful - lightbulb moment, thank you x

  • @richardactor
    @richardactor 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Another great video. Thanks for these.

  • @JN25376
    @JN25376 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Excellent video! Very helpful. Thank you.

  • @gingerindian1141
    @gingerindian1141 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    SHE JUST LOOKS GREAT.

  • @Megan6772
    @Megan6772 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have feelings about the part where you say we can't expect others to meet our needs now that we're an adult. My mom passed away when I was 8 and she came from a very large family of siblings and I felt abandoned by them then when I needed them most but also they show very little effort to be a part of my life today. My dad remarried a narcissist who has completely driven a wedge between us, he is trauma bonded to her and has completely changed to a man I no longer recognize. So I have essentially lost both parents and feel very vulnerable and abandoned. It feels very triggering and extremely unfair to say that I don't expect some sort of compensation from these aunts and uncles. I do expect them to care about me in my life and to care about being a part of it, and I expect them to show more effort since I am without parents, then they would otherwise. We are told to seek out other relationships to meet the needs that would normally be met from our parents. So I do feel that these statements can be contradictory. Could you please share your thoughts on this?

  • @PN.mod20
    @PN.mod20 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Found a very interesting video. It's on NICABM TH-cam channel with Dr. Janina Fisher. She descibes how feelings of worthlessness is a survival mechanism. Video is called "Trauma and Unworthiness". I think it's a very insightful perspective.

    • @Megan6772
      @Megan6772 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Tysm 🙏❤️

  • @loekbongaarts2130
    @loekbongaarts2130 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Great video, thank you very much !!

  • @srividhyasridhar9879
    @srividhyasridhar9879 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    A very good vedio and good conceptualisation with clarity. Please continue making the vedios.

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thanks for your feedback. We’re planning to do some more next weekend.

  • @watchingfilmsshows9568
    @watchingfilmsshows9568 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you!

  • @idunusegoogleplus
    @idunusegoogleplus 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Maybe it's Freudian but anyone else really want her to be your mother? I feel like I'd be the most well-adjusted person on earth if she was my parent. I'll make do with learning from her how to reparent myself.

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Awww. Check out my good parent blanket hug video. I use my mom voice in that too.

  • @carissarea6442
    @carissarea6442 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’m trying to start somewhere but I cannot imagine being vulnerable ever again

  • @danielafortuna9116
    @danielafortuna9116 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Com base no que vi e li da teoria dos esquemas acredito finalmente ter descoberto o motivo de eu sempre ficar em total panico quando me deparo com agulhas e sangue e coisas que remetam a isso. Enquanto criança eu nao me senti segura e protegida quando me encontrava em situaçoes assim e tentando ser forte ignorei a minha necessidade de ser vulneravel e acolhida e acarinhada. Eu ignorei o lazer e busquei desempenho por meio de estudos e atividades que me testassem a fim de me sentir capaz e protegida por mim mesma. Sinto que alguns comportamentos desadaptativos envolvendo namoros e minha alimentaçao vem disso e a melancolia com que me deparo a cerca de 8 anos pode ter sido desencadeada la atras e so entao entrei em contato e nao sabendo lidar com isso pela necessidade de ser cada vez mais dura comigo mesma e ser "forte" eu quebrei. Hoje tento me adaptar ao fato de que sou adulta , semi independente pois logo vou me formar na pos graduaçao e começar a trabalhar , tenho amor e posso me defender , uma agulha para uma criança pode ser um monstro mas enquanto adulta posso readaptar minha mente para pensar " Eu quero e posso mudar,posso passar por esse exame de sangue ou doaçao de sangue e ficar bem , sao so umas furadas, eu ja operei vesicula e fiquei bem , quem encara cortes encara furos e coisas do tipo". Eu nao preciso ser compulsiva por comida ou por intimidade fisica com outras pessoas , nao preciso ser uma nerd apenas estudar , eu nao preciso ja ter o melhor emprego do mundo de cara apenas um emprego que pague as contas pra começar , eu posso ser grata por tudo de bom que tenho na minha vida e lidar com as emoçoes e momentos nao tao legais. Eu posso abraçar a minha criança vulneravel da mesma forma que eu desejava ser abraçada quando tinha aquela idade e dizer "Voce nao precisa ser a filha perfeita , a aluna ideal , a forte que nunca chora , voce pode sentir e mostrar , lidar com isso de modo a aprender com isso...".

  • @SmallGroupChatForcefield
    @SmallGroupChatForcefield 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This should be taught in secondary schools 😭 for life skills for those neglected of love and self regulation

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      We completely agree with you.

    • @SmallGroupChatForcefield
      @SmallGroupChatForcefield 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@thePSYCHcollective thank you so much for doing the work you do ❤️ I have been diagnosed with BPD traits, your videos give me hope

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      You’re welcome

  • @jos7006
    @jos7006 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Didn’t know Gal Gadot was a therapist. Brilliant video! 😁

  • @Sandycheeks902
    @Sandycheeks902 ปีที่แล้ว

    Amazing!!! Loved it. It's a lot of work to do.
    Therapist kinda look like Taylor Swift ☺️

  • @redmoon8217
    @redmoon8217 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is not always the case. I loved my child very much and i tried very hard to comfort him and teach him to regulate. He always had problems regulating and would push me away from every early age and often hit me.

  • @alexandrugheorghe5610
    @alexandrugheorghe5610 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    In my case, as a child, my nervous system learned to shutdown because being angry would have meant death.

  • @rachgeorgia9993
    @rachgeorgia9993 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    thanks so much for making these videos

  • @rosnelson4146
    @rosnelson4146 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks

  • @safesclart
    @safesclart 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    what a stunning woman

  • @janakeller9737
    @janakeller9737 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm becoming less skeptical about these videos. The biophysical explanations for the strategies to understand how we can be more understanding an work through some thinks that are stuck

  • @orangeblue3531
    @orangeblue3531 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Hi Jess, when we reparent ourselves, I imagine that it would be ideal to be in an environment that doesn't keep triggering our schemas? So if we try to remove ourselves from that situation, is that Healthy Adult doing the right thing, or is that maladaptive coping? i.e. flight..

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      If the environment is honestly not conducive to recovery, then leave (if you can). Healthy adults know how to set boundaries.

  • @emmapinn5216
    @emmapinn5216 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love the product of your unrelenting standards (ie. These videos):-p

  • @Kim-kw7fo
    @Kim-kw7fo 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Interesting

  • @nickbrighty1930
    @nickbrighty1930 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Another great video, thank you. In your description, you hashtag BPD; does that mean that people who've had pretty insufficient childhoods will likely have BPD, or at least manifest many of the symptoms in their thinking and feeling patterns..?

  • @carissarea6442
    @carissarea6442 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I’ve started a major to do list to keep me busy so I can detach from the upcoming pain of my grandkids moving to another state. I don’t possess self compassion. I just want to die but I keep waking up

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Self compassion is hard.
      Self compassion is crucial.
      Imagine a friend in your situation.
      What would you say to them?
      Would you judge them harshly?
      A helpful exercise is to write to yourself as though you were writing to your friend in your predicament.
      The malevolent may not deserve compassion, but everyone else does.

  • @givemeadream
    @givemeadream 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Wonder Woman have pure good schema therapy understanding 😂

  • @tobiaswolf6630
    @tobiaswolf6630 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great videos. Do you have ressources on actual interventions like imagery rescription? I figured I know much about schema theray in theory but I didn´t do the actual work yet.

  • @danielhull1316
    @danielhull1316 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Audio too quiet

  • @Prudenthermit
    @Prudenthermit ปีที่แล้ว

  • @supersim1357
    @supersim1357 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    It seems like this video is marketing schema therapy instead of presenting multiple solutions to a well-defined solution. Perhaps I'm wrong.

  • @lessandra602
    @lessandra602 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Does anybody know of some books to read with a damaged vulnerable self? I have alexythmya.

  • @anitaquinn3068
    @anitaquinn3068 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video. Can I pls have a link to the work sheet?

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hello, I’m glad you liked it
      Here’s the link. www.thepsychcollective.com/vulnerable-child

  • @candacewagner5435
    @candacewagner5435 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I need help .I'm struggling.been working on my emotions .it's so hard

  • @Darfaultner
    @Darfaultner 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Does Death Anxiety stem from the Vulnerable Child?

    • @thePSYCHcollective
      @thePSYCHcollective  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      There is a ‘vulnerability to harm’ schema which would be felt by the vulnerable child. Does that fit with your question?

    • @Darfaultner
      @Darfaultner 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@thePSYCHcollective Thanks for answering :) I'll check it out. Love your content, btw

  • @rokksysoftpaws7022
    @rokksysoftpaws7022 ปีที่แล้ว

    The adds are always so much louder. It hurt my ears

  • @sergiolembo5310
    @sergiolembo5310 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I see a lot of issues with schema therapy...first of all the very judgemental nomenclature assigned to the different states of mind (healthy adult...really? it could not be more judgmental than that). Second, I think there is a big lie within this model, and it lies in the mantra: you must take care of the vulnerable child who is the focal point of yourself...tbh, one should take care of something that has something good to give back in return, but this is not the case for vulnerable child mood..indeed, this mood is the worst part of anybody, it is like cancer...the lies is that schema therapy does not admit that the vulnerable child is a disease, a disease that one can not recover from...I am open to discussion: please tell me if I am wrong by answering the question: how is the vulnerable child a good thing to nurture?

  • @dawnbodger5979
    @dawnbodger5979 ปีที่แล้ว

    Please fix your sound