The deeper ENFJ & INFP relationship
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ส.ค. 2024
- In this video I discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly of the ENFJ and INFP relationship (it's mostly good) and tends to be very deep. These two are sometimes referred to as "mirrors" because neither of the two share a single cognitive function. Their respective function stacks are reflections of each other in terms of the introversion/extroversion direction.
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#enfj #infp #mbti #16personalities
Wow, that was just an unreal experience for me watching this. I'm an ENFJ and I've been married to an INFP for 35 years. Even the way you explained how the types communicate is so accurate. Your demonstration of how the conversation goes is so true, and we have used almost exactly the same wording to explain our conversations. When we first met, my husband would say things quietly and I would ask him what he said, and he would say, "It's okay, it doesn't matter." And I would say, "I'm asking because I really want to know what you think and how you feel about things." I didn't have high hopes that I could find the right person for me before we married, but when I met him, our relationship was magical and amazing immediately, beyond anything I could have ever imagined. We got together the night we met and married six months later. It has been a fantastic journey, with us both finally being able to express the love and kindness that no one had wanted from us before. The downsides you mentioned have all come up, but we've been able to resolve them without too much difficulty. One downside you didn't mention is that we stay up really late every night talking for hours after work, so we never get much sleep :)
I GOT THE CHILLS READING THIS IT’S SO TRUE. I’m the ENFJ and just met the love of my life, who is an INFP. Been dating for only a month, and resonate with every word you just said. Thank you for sharing- very validating and reassuring words. Stay blessed my friends.
@@mythic_media Best wishes to you!!
I'm ENFJ, you should see my library.
I feel like you nailed me as an ENFJ….now where’s my kinky, mature, sexy, funny and successful, INFP?
Right here...Just deciding on whether I should process my emotions or take a nap
#IWillDoBoth
Here
Sarah M
I'm an ENFJ, and I think of INPS like that picture where there's a cat looking in the mirror and it's reflection is lion. I think INFPs are underestimated. Meanwhile, I feel like the inverse of the picture. I feel like the world sees a lion, but I'm looking in the mirror seeing a kitten. Anyway, the kitten in me, recognizes the lion in INFPs... but maybe more like the male lions who like to relax lol
😂😂😂😂😂😂❤😅🎉
Hi. None of us is completely lion-like, or completely kitten-like. ENFJs amaze me by being everything that I am not. If an INFP were to look at you and see the same kitten you see in a mirror, they would love you because INFPs love kittens.
You ENFJs inspire epic amounts of confidence in practically everybody because you really are that good at what you do, but it takes hard work to be that good. You might make it look easy, but people underestimate how hard you work. You are stronger than you think, and even if you don't always exceed everybody's expectations you are still great.
I am an infp and my boyfriend is enfj. We didn't know why we so matched each other until I knew mbti. We have been dating almost 5years and our love is stronger and stronger and I have never felt boring with my boyfriend,. We adore each other and we respect each other. The time goes soooo fast when we are together. We talk a lot and we laugh a lot. We very often say our life is so good.
It sounds like you found a great partner thanks for sharing your experiences 😊
Sooo when's the wedding?
I'm an INFP (4w5) and while my best, most beloved friend has never done the MBTI test, I can't help but believe he must be an ENFJ. It's just gotta be, 'cause this is too right on the nail.
The part about the conversations is very spot on ! I have two childhood best friends, an ENFJ and an ENFP, and everytime we are in a group chat with just the three of us we havr like 5 different convos with the ENFP because we keep bouncing around and the ENFJ is always refocusing it to the main point lol. Sometimes I wonder how she is so patient when dealing with us XD
Spot on! I love enfjs so much. They are so kind and uplifting, but yeah i can't stand so much organizing and socializing 😂
I had to smile so hard because of the voice you made with your hand movement. I'm an INFP too and I always do such things. Expressing what I mean by voice and strange noises and my ENFJ husbands just adores this so much when I'm doing it. He always makes me do it again 😂
I have two friends that I think are ENFJs. They always seem to be on 'team Desiree' even when I'm not...super encouraging. Their example inspires me to work on being more structured and take more of an initiative in helping others. (Being married to an ESFJ helps me in those areas too.)
What a great video. My first long-term girlfriend was an ENFJ. I never understood why we got along so well until I started deep diving MBTI. We seemed like opposites, yet deeply connected. We were the self improvement couple. We took all kinds of courses together. She was also good at helping me in social situations. We would walk into a room of new people and, by the end, I would know everyone. No way I could have done that on my own. And I don't even think she consciously "helped" me. It was just something she did naturally. It was a great relationship for mutual growth.
I am INFP, i also dreamed about someone who can drag me to the world, who can socialize me, cuz in my deepest mind i always want to see the world, being part of the world. But i cant do it by myself, i am not like that, but i want to do that with someone who fit for me. I just write him in my mind who i want but yet i still not find him. 😢 But i know if i find my true ENFJ it will be blow minding. He will just jump out my dream and i will be so happy. 😊 Cuz i feel i live hermit life now and i am sad because of it, i want more social life. But other type of personalities cant understand me, they just pointing me with fingers like: weirdo, stranger.. they think i am an Alien with cuteness.. but they never try make me out come from my place. So i want someone who just want to do a lot of things with me like explore, travel, find new perspective in life, being spontaneous and do things what feels. I hope i can find ENFJ like that.. its my deepest wish i want. 🤗 But i am happy because i know somewhere someone existing who is like my dream.
They are out there xlowri3910
You'll find it. Never give up. Keep working on yourself and keep yourself out there as much as you can. An ENFJ will eventually find you. I'm an ENFJ and we can read people like a book and if INFP's and ENFJ's are as great together as people say, then they will absolutely love what they see and just open up the world for you, will encourage you, will teach you, will truly believe in you, and will always be there for you if you fall. Just don't give up, I believe in you. You'll find what you're looking for one day.
I can relate to that desire so much. I live an extremely isolated life and even if im around people it feels like i can see them and all their inner beauty but all they see in me is a very distant, difficult person who wants to be alone. They misunderstand me and hurt me unintentionally by rejecting me because they don’t know how to deal with me and i can’t connect with anyone anymore. In order to cope with the loneliness and the feeling of being unnecessary in this world I’ve created a voice inside my head who i can have the most beautiful conversations with and together we explore all those dreams about the future. It’s beautiful but it’s not real and i feel like I’m missing a lot while only living in my head.
I think it’s some kind of infp curse that doesn’t even feel like a curse sometimes.
Thing is i even found an enfj who i see every day and we are both crushing hard on each other but so far we couldn’t connect because i was so distant. In one month i will switch schools and probably never see him again. It feels like im missing a huge chance. Like maybe he’s the one for me and I’m the one for him. Maybe i can actually give him all the love and appreciation he needs and teach him all I’ve learned about life and inner worlds and in return he can give me the feeling of being important, the feeling of being needed and accepted and understood.
I wanna get to know him so badly even though i know it’s gonna be difficult. Time is running and im determined to try everything possible to do that.
But right now it’s difficult enough for me to hold eye contact😅 Any advices on how i can approach him or make him approach me?
@@relaxolotl834write your number on a lil piece of paper with a heart and give it to them, say, “since you never asked…here you go” rest will be history
@@relaxolotl834the SAME
True to the core! We are so collaborative couple, our friends call us. We've been married for 21 years and counting.
Thank you for validating this Brandon!
I knew an enfj once. He manipulated me and all my friends, then manipulated me to be in a relationship with him :D
Unhealthy ENFJs can do that, thank you for sharing your experience Calicatsocks
Next discuss about : INFP and INFJ relationship
I’ve definitely been an intimate relationship with one. The sex was off the charts!!! The understanding & compassion 💯+ BUT the ethics were off. Please, loving exceptional INFPs: whatever gender, whatever you relate to by gender/quier/other/ preference/s: I openly accept you. However, I believe I’m not the only INFP who doesn’t feel “good” enough ever for the rest of the world. However, all of us will bless the sabbatical of adulthood bc we’ve had to pick up crap from our pasts and let it go. We believe it’s normal. NO, my Dear Sweet but AUDACIOUS INFPs. There are so many layers to us, we may actually feel climate change. Lol
I think my last relationship could have been an infj, these definitely encourage to share feelings and help with what it can point towards, where my blind spots are...great video, thank you 😊
So would INFPs break their personal standards for a loyal relationship. INFPs often get bullied
Brandon you're right i thought that my relationship with my ex enfj girlfriend will last longer but i realize she broke me up cause i am unhealthy. 😢😢😢
I am an ENfJ and am losing my INfP husband to addiction and going through a separation. It’s extremely painful.
Brandon Could you make video or add on list about healthy and unhealthy INFP because i still have hope that i can back on my relationship 😢
sorry but i laughed at the "moderately healthy" 😂
Omg this is what i have been thought about. Hmmm i was having girlfriend which ENFJ but now she left me 😢😢😢 i really sad that i can't talk with her anymore. The thing that you said it's true Brandon like when INFP start to expand the conversation ENFJ start to cooling down the infp idea i experienced it
Just because it happens naturally doesn't mean it tends to be healthy - in my life when that ENFJ type gets interested in me it is probably in my best interest to run away from them because I get pretty much nothing out of the relationship, although it can be comfortable.
What do you mean by this?
What do you mean by, you get nothing out of the relationship?
how is it unhealthy? (Genuinely curious) I'm an INFP-T here btw so will like to save myself a heartbreak
@@jrcmes I'm more talking about a friendship. I would be doing different math for a relationship.
Am I the only one who's tired of us being shipped with the ENFJs? I've never agreed that this is a good pair just because the fe function is very irritating to deal with as a fi-dom. Fe likes to control too much and can't handle anybody who isn't the way it wants to be. It wants to fix everybody into its mold. It's also extremely manipulative. Obviously, that's not every high fe user but I do still see this frequently in them and it's just a turn-off. Like, I don't get the appeal.
I think that it depends on what a person is looking for in a partner, but yeah the dom Fi and Fe clash can be a bit brutal
I am INFJ-A with Fe function. I have been through this case and brought out the problem with an INFP.
Would advice to take this "manipulation" with a grain of salt because most of the time its just being straightforward than trying to manipulate. It's just the differences in moral value and how things should work rationally in each other's context. Overall, it's nothing serious about voicing opinion unless it's coming from an unhealthy Fe user that forces things to go their way and ignores boundary.
Don't let one bad experience tarnish your whole world view instead use it as a stepping stone to understand from another perspective.
Healthy mature Fe users will learn to communicate the way the other person is comfortable with, for example prioritize emotional validation & reassurance than using the tactic which they have been using throughout their lives by using logic to make sense of feelings.
This is the clash between Fe and Fi users which is really hard to deal with by getting both to see each other perspective due to the power struggle of being misunderstood, it takes time to learn something we've not learn in our lives and vice versa.
It is really common to fall back to our old pattern of communication we are used to but consistent effort and reminding each other gently of the boundary not to cross will develop into deep love and trust.
Someday you will find that it will become a habit of the Fe user become very reassuring with you even if you did not ask for it(being serious) and the Fi user, which is you, become straightforward in certain situation which you be able to(being playful) because you will safe to express your thoughts and emotions with this particular individual and also apply this to other aspect of your life.
@@TamagoEgg -
------"Don't let one bad experience tarnish your whole world view instead use it as a stepping stone to understand from another perspective."
I really wish people wouldn't jump to this conclusion every time this is brought up. I'm not basing this off of one single experience. I have this same experience almost every time I'm around a high fe-user. It's also a tad bit annoying having to go back and repeat that I already made the point that this is not how ALL fe-users act.
"Obviously, that's not every high fe user" This was the exact thing that I said in my comment. I really don't like it when I've already made a point and people completely overlook it like I didn't say anything. I am fully aware that not EVERY fe -user is going to act like this but I DO see this frequently in these types hence why I don't recommend this pairing IN GENERAL. If a fe-user doesn't act this way then I'm more than happy to be friends with them. Any two types can work. Obviously. That should go without saying. However, IN GENERAL, I don't see a lot of respect for the individual in this type and that's one of the main things a fi-user needs from whoever they're with. Romantic or otherwise.
Many fe-users have a tendency towards the things I mentioned. It's not always people misunderstanding them and it's not always them being unhealthy. This is a pretty common trait among these types and while NOT EVERY PERSON OF THIS TYPE IS GOING TO ACT LIKE THIS I find that a pretty good majority of them do. Ok? Ok. Please don't come back at me with that again. I've already made that point.
I took 4 times test,
Two times infp , two times enfj!🥴 what the heck !!😂which one i am lol😂
As an ENFJ, I would bet you are an INFP. 😊
I’ve taken the test 8 times over a decade and have always tested ENFJ except for one time when I tested as INFJ.
The fact that you tested as a “P” even once is the giveaway, I believe.🌟
One more question. Why do you think they say INFP and INFJ are similar when each of their cognitive functions are so different ? FI Ne Si and Te are nowhere on the INFJ cognitive list. How the heck are they similar ?
They say it because they are both introverted feelers, but mostly they say it because of bad information and the 16 personalities tests out there that don’t take cog funks into account. This is the same reason why people believe that they are “an INFP and an ENFP” or that they are “ESTJ on some days, an ISFJ on others”.
If infp need space to relieve and enfj highly driven extroverted why on Google they said enfj and INFP is such a golden pair?
They balance each other out in ways… some INFPs want an extroverted partner 😎
Because most of us ENFJs are ambiverts so we understand your alone time and can respect it because we need it also.
@@OfficialMarliz i just wanna know from your point of view what do you think about INFPs?
@@OfficialMarliz like there are 10 enfjs so is it all of it could be compatible with infp?
@@sokTAU911 As a male INFP I get along very well with all my ENFJ friends. 3 female and 1 male. I seem to be able to find them in the crowd. I just feel it when I'm near them. Even ENFJ brief acquaintances I have had. I think we tend be drawn to each other because of our nature. We don't get much sleep. ☺️
what do you mean by cough up the bridge, like INFP would do anything to be loyal to their partner/spouse ? Or was that in another video ?
“Jump off a bridge” I believe. I censored it
@@psychcasserole Ohhhh shxt ! They would ?!!!! Thank you man! That now makes total sense. Man, you are a beautiful man, thank you so very much!
@@psychcasserole So do they even battle with - principle or loyalty ??? My principles or my loyalty ??? Do they struggle with choosing, or not ?
I am an ENFJ and I love the honest approach here! I ADORE my INFPs🩷 🩷🩷 but will likely only have them as friends.
It might be an unpopular opinion (eek!) but ENFJs tend to carry the weight of the intimate relationship when things get challenging.
With INFPs tendency to delve within, this can result in a pretty imbalanced carrying out of tasks while the INFP is stewing (emotional, physical, financial, etc).
That “checking out” negatively impacts the ENFJ on a deeper level than most realize. And I don’t think many ENFJs would readily admit to it either. ENFJ will dutifully carry the INFP until they are back on track, but it’s kinda not great…
I think these types are fabulous!!!!✨ (Just not in an intimate relationship.)
I have to say that I can see where you’re coming from Exokitten thank you for watching 😊
Yeah, as an ENFJ, I don't do well when I had a partner that checked out, needed to be alone, and seemed dead inside. Since we tend to blame ourselves when things go wrong, it drives me crazy that I'm with someone who is not in a place to communicate what is going on and what I need to do to either correct things or what I need to do to help you. I'm an ambivert as well, so I need my alone time too but I'm open about when I do and open to say, as much as I can, why I need to be alone. I guess it's just communication. I need someone to communicate what is going on and not just go off an be alone with very little communication. I can only deal with that for so long before it really starts to affect me deeply.
I always found that my best relationship I ever had and will ever have was with a fellow ENFJ. The connection, the communication, the dreams, goals, values, everything aligned to almost perfection. We just loved each others company and would talk for endless hours every night. I had someone that I could be there for through thick and thin and someone who would selflessly do the same. Honestly, I think I would only want to date a fellow ENFJ again. I'm 35 and looking to settle down, I'm not looking for someone who will shut the world out, which includes me when life gets really tough. I want a partner who gets where I'm coming from and who I get just as much.
Infp - don’t think I’ve ever met or befriended an enfj. I feel like I’m missing out. 🤔🥹🤷🏻♀️
Wow there is so much to learn. 😮 I wonder if any INFP finds themselves magnetic. Interesting. What is the most sexy thing for an INFP?! 🫠🤭💗
It varies greatly but many INFPs just want someone to make the first move, that is damn sexy 🤣