E come se direbbe in italiano? Mi potresti dare anche qualche esempio, per favore? Lo sto imparando e questa espressione sarebbe divertente da usare, haha
Your portrayal of the mother opening the door to the empty-handed boyfriend was classic! It was the best facial expression acted out ever! Olived it! LoL
I thought I was never going to get my ear to be able to understand Chinese; turns out, I just hadn't found your videos yet! Thank you for speaking so clearly and giving pinyin for everything!
When you know Chinese is not only A language: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, THERE ARE BLOODY MORE LANGUAGE THAN A MANDARIN, WE GOT CANTONESE, HAKKA SHANGHAINESE, MACANESE, ETC, ETC. DON’T YOU DARE SAY “I know how to speak Chinese” lol Btw, we have 9 pingying in Cantonese, it will be very easy for you to learn it (sarcastically)😊😊😊
.......YES. I MOST CERTAINLY DO WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH A CHINESE LADY FRIEND.. A ''''CHRISTIAN'''' PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP.... STARTING WITH YOU... THE GORGEOUS PRETTY TEACHER !!
Hello Shuoshuo, I feel the best translation for 撒交 "SA JIAO" is a combination of "Coquettish" and "Nag" Google translate says "Coquettish" my feeling is its "nagging". LOL
At least the family relationships are pretty different from Northern Europe. After we leave our parents at 18, we only see them during Christmas and couldn't care less what they think after that. Also playing hard to get doesn't work, because getting rejected once is immediately understood as being rejected forever.
rejection has a time tag. rejection once does not mean rejection forever. it is understood in most part of the world. of course northern europeans have many more sex partners on average, they may not have the patience.
@@MrLuhuazhao playing hard to get is a sign of emotional immaturity. Even if there's an expiry date on rejection, most adults in the west don't want to date someone who has the mental age of a young teenager
When you know we have Christmas instead of the Chinese tradition in Hong Kong(former English colony which is the last of British empire, retreated in 1997 and gave it back to the wrong country, which Taiwan should’ve got it bc they were the people they have contract with) and in Macau(former Portugal colony, retreated in 1993)
I'm Chinese-American, about equally competent in both languages, and I don't think the term that she uses is best translated as "playing hard-to-get." I think 矜持 is better translated as being prudish and reserved. Although unlike the word "prude," 矜持 is often (not always) used in a positive manner to highlight someone's self-control and elegance.
@@flubadubdubthegreat1272It is not immature. It's all about CULTURE. Have you ever sat down and seriously searched and learned about Asian cultures? In most Asian cultures this is the norm and it is not seen as a sign of immaturity or something. That's how things work there. Calling a certain characteristics of a society "immature" only makes you ignorant. What would you think if somebody told you that all Westerners are just playboys/whores who only cares about sex just because Westerners make several girlfriends/boyfriends throughout their lives?? Well, at least that's what more than half of the world thinks about Westerners are like, not only Asians but many more as well. You can continue to be promiscuous and call it "maturity" as you want but do not try to discredit a culture without understanding it first.
If many westerners watching this and think, "These practices are bizarre", I as an asian myself just wanna say, "Well that's the asian relationship" and YES it really happens.
I've been dating a Chinese woman from Shenyang for almost a year now, and now I understand that sa jiao action. She got mad at me the first time I didn't respond to it, and I initially thought she was playing around acting like a little kid, since she jokes around a lot anyway. I finally got her to agree not to get mad at me for not understanding these kinds of things without at least explaining them to me. She doesn't do this one anymore though, possibly because I honestly dislike it. It appears childish. One thing my girlfriend does that you didn't mention (and may just be regional) is when she pretends she's mad at me for something and pretend-chokes me. When I didn't respond properly the first time to this, she got mad, and finally explained that I was supposed to act like I was being choked. I'm not sure what purpose this serves, but she likes it.
Girls that can play "sa jiao" are more popular in China. However, not every man likes it. A small percent of Chinese men also hate sajiao. Some girls, especially those want to show they are independent, don't play sajiao.
There's an element of helplessness or needing help. This triggers natural instincts in men to help or provide for a woman. I'm one of those that thinks it's cute and would make me think of ways to help.
Hello there! I am a Bengali boy learning Chinese. Well, for 撒嬌 we have a specific word highly used in Bengali which is "allad". I believe we have so much in common with Chinese people. But personally I don't know how will I react if my girlfriend acts like a little girl demanding what she wants haha. In Bangladesh there is a negative feeling towards this kind of attitude by men and women as they may appear selfish, not caring for their partner.
Not Chinese but American here also learning Chinese, just wanted to say your country is super interesting, hope to learn the language their and visit a lot :D Also one of my favorite flags ngl
In US and W Europe + etc?. there used to be moderate equivalent when women and girls were advised by tradition minded adults to act less knowledgeable and less competent to attract male desire to protect them, but this disappeared in 1960s with rebirth of feminist women s movement (though child like behavior would have been seen as shocking lack of mental development.)
Read the post he clearly says he’s from Bangladesh.. yea there are Bengali living in india but better not assume everyone is from india. Where are you from?
Always be Respectful and very Sincere. Remember - if she says No or she's not interested, - Don't become a stalker or become angry and annoying. Be an Adult and act like a grown-man. Women typically have more options then men, so ultimately it's their choice. You will meet someone else. Stay Safe NYC
Your audience is not only 20 somethings, and I’m sure I’m not the only person who has been married before. A lot of people are widowed/divorced and we’re more likely to be meeting someone’s children than their parents. Maybe you could do a lesson for those of us who are older? You’re such a good actor I’m sure you can do it!
great video! but there's one thing i want to correct is that 撒娇 is pronounced as 【sā jiāo】. 撒 is a word with different tone. normally we use the third tone (with the meaning of "scatter"), but here we should use the first tone to express "express"
Great video! As my wife parents don't like western food and I am also not crazy about Chinese 白酒, I always gift them with some bottles of 白酒 which I received as a gift as well😂
Then try/gift them some 米酒 (rice wine) or 梅酒(if I’m not mistaken, it’s berry wine) (I’m just a 12 years old btw, I don’t drink wine but I guess that’s what some adults like lol)
About 7 months ago I was contacted by a Chinese woman , about 42, We spoke for hours and that was months ago, and the relationship has thrived. I feel I am in love with one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen and it looks like it is mutual. Problem I have run into is the differemce in cultures. It is a very real thing and I have inadvertantly insulted my love more than several times and am constantly apologizing. It is really very hard and constant mistakes cannot be avoided in the beginning. But after a while it has come together. I thank G-D for her patience although an argument could be made that on occasion her p
All of your videos are excellent. And the one on why you left China elevated my level of respect for you; not because of the restrictions that you exposed but because of the determination that you exhibited about you following your dreams and finding happiness in your work. Of course, this video is very educational as well - thanks for making it.
This was really interesting and entertaining. I live in Taiwan and got married here. We've switched between Taiwan and the UK many times, but now we have 3 kids we settled down in Taiwan. About pouting, I've found guys over here don't like it. Too childish. They seem to like woman who can earn money and look to the future. My wife didn't really do it, but I think it's because she went to the UK to study for many years and understood what works and what does not. The pouting is funny for a short time but In the back of my mind I do think, 'grow up.' Meeting my parent-in-laws for the first time was funny, as I wasn't a doctor so 'Mama' wasn't so impressed in the beginning. 'Papa' he is so relaxed and was just happy his third daughter found someone :-) That was 20 years ago and everything is great. The key is persistence and be truthful. Mama always wants the best for her daughters.
Hi 说说，in English, some people use the phrase "a Chinese" to mean “一个中国人", but actually, it's only the words for nationalities that end with the letter "n" that can be used as nouns for people. For example, we can say an American, a Russian, a German, or a Korean, but it's not really right to say a French, a British, or a Chinese to talk about a person. For these, you need to say a French person, a British person, or a Chinese person.
@@cristoferchanimak I hadn't thought of that. Some black people that I've known, however, do prefer to refer to themselves as "blacks", although it may not be, as you said, grammatically correct.
Lol your “Mum” character is just like my Chinese mother-in-law. I now have a good job, own an apartment and married her daughter but now she wants a grandchild because my wife is over 30. I’m younger and am not ready but she is putting pressure on my wife to have a kid. I guess that’s a big culture difference as here in the UK, there is no pressure to have children or get married.
Excellent video! You seem to posses a rare combination of acting talent, solid linguistic knowledge, and good presentation skills. And yes, your consummate charm does help too. You are well beyond most of the rest of the crowd. Many thanks for your work!
Sa Jiao doesn't really have word just a slang term which would be " attention getter" or the phrase" puppy eyes" also works as in when a puppy gives you that look you can't refuse even after you scratched his belly a 100 times.
Great explanation of Chinese dating concepts, and the vocabulary is good to know! At what point do sons and daughters tell their parents about who they like, they're pursuing or who they are dating? 撒娇 is a kind of playful flirtation. Aside from being able to provide, 撒娇 sets up an easy scenario where both parties know exactly what the other person wants--there's no guessing and the rewards for both parties are immediate. So I think 撒娇 is desirable because it's a fun, familiar way for everyone to get rewarded for their actions (a purse for her; praise for him). Of course, as you said, whether a couple likes 撒娇 is up to their own dynamic.
Many children won't talk about their romantic life with their parents, if you are pursuing someone or like someone, normally your parents won't know about that. Some people tell parents that there IS a person they are dating but they won't officially meet.
Is a hypocracy spciety..they date their classmates secretly and pretend to be friends...date old men choose by parents and pretend to be virgen....then find a guy with money and marry..get money and/or nationality and then divorce or have children depending on how lazy she is...sex is only provide to catch the guy and have babies..then forget you have a penis or find a lover..either way they dont cae as long as it dies not diminish their allowance
Nice video and I can learn new words! It's really sad to see many of my friends in China which are 剩女 (leftover woman, what a cruel word btw) not because they actually are, but it's the society that says so. Some of them are really under pressure.
撒娇. I would say it is considered rude in western culture. If I had a girlfriend like that I would feel she is very rude to me. In our culture its kind of rude to ask for a gift unless it's for a special occasion like Christmas or a Birthday.
I'm Russian and just FYI "撒娇" means "ластиться", "кокетничать", "капризничать", "жеманничать". As a noun - "избалованность" 🙂🙂🙂 yes, Russians love you, 说！☺️☺️
Great video!! From my understanding, "sa jiao" corresponds to "aegyo" in Korean culture. We can describe it roughly as acting in a cute way in order to get attention.
6:35 I think your theory is probably not far off. An attraction towards a "protector/protected" sort of relationship dynamic, is in some form quite common across the world I think, though from what I can tell, where I live, it tends to be more the girls who look for a boyfriend with attributes of a protector (tall, physically fit, etc), than guys wanting a 撒娇ing girlfriend. I think in particular the girl acting childish is not something guys here tend to be into. Obviously things differ greatly from person to person ^^
Arriving empty handed to someone's home whether it's your significant other's parents or someone else is also considered somewhat offensive in some Eastern European cultures.
How the hell is 矜持 different than in the West?? It's EXACTLY the same. Actually, I even found out that if a Chinese girl liked me, SHE invited me. Many times they took the initiative, and if they didn't it means they were not interested in me. Maybe I got too used to be approached by the girls here and almost never initiate myself talking to them. If a girl likes you, she will come to you without you needing to pursue her.
i am 26 years old i am single but i never thought about dating and my mom wanted me to get married although i been focusing on my life most friend talk to me getting a girlfriend already and somefriend on facebook or working mate
I’m a little bit confused, I don’t know if my “ex-boyfriend “ behavior is part of the Chinese culture or not, but we have been dating only for 1 week, and he says I don’t love him because I don’t move with him right away (he is 37). But he barely knows my Chinese name , he doesn’t bother to get to know me , how can I live with someone who I just met, and doesn’t want to know me first ? Am I wrong ??? Am I too western ?
Daniel Richardson I don’t think there’s a culture on this planet where you just see someone, you date twice, you fall in love and want to live with that person right away without knowing anything about each other (we have to use a translator for those few times I wanted to order something at the restaurant). I just wanted to make sure that I was right about not accepting his love -lol
I love China. First starting in 2006. It wasn't on my wish list but went to see the country and meet people. Loved it. Still going. Yes, there is a cultural difference. And I know and accept it.
And you will accept Taiwan is part of the great fearsome PRC instead of it being independent, And accepting Hong Kong people are no long hongkongers because they are moving out of Hong Kong because of political reasons We love China, don’t we 😊😊😊(sarcastically)
I pretty much experienced some of these mentioned in the video.specially the "being baby" thing.I have been living 扬州 for about 2 years..I have a chinese girlfriend too..But me personally don't wanna meet her parents until I'm ready... relationship cultures are pretty weird in some particular contexts in China.For instance if you are a boy you must have to own a house and car to marry. Stereotype Chinese girls push their boyfriends to get married quickly.Come on!! I don't wanna meet her parents until I am ready for everything.One more thing is cuteness overloaded in China 🥴 the girls are always like a baby..but as a grown up foreign man I don't really like it sometimes. All of them are my personal opinion. Please don't get me wrong I didn't want to hurt anyone or any culture...it is absolutely your choice what you want to do. By the way you're pretty good actress. Specially the facial expressions of stereotype Chinese Mom😂
hahaha, best video ever!!!, Well... now I´m not sure if I´m ready to fall in love with a beautiful Chinese woman... I really love this video, you are amazing!!! .
If you have a problem with your Chinese partner, don't explain something. You have better keep a secret, but you can say that you don't say something because you don't want. This is much more efficient than explaining the problem and other psychological strategies.
My beautiful sister. it's called pouting in the US to get what you want, lots of love, oh and by the way my 孩子们, have tried and failed, I am tiger mom haha.
I met a girl who is from Shanghai and we seemed to hit off and talk a lot and she even asked me to a concert as our first date. We did plan a second date but we all of a sudden aren’t talking as much but she does have a lot of work to do but we are still planning to get together Friday but haven’t decided what we are doing. Haha I am a western man and may have tried holding her hand a little to early I hope she doesn’t hate me haha we laughed about it and we did hold hands and hold each other I just I hoped I didn’t embarrass her or make her uncomfortable haha hope my second date goes well! Sorry for the long comment haha
Except your crush is from Hong Kong, BECAUSE THEY KNOW ENGLISH FROM 3 YEARS OLD. And also, don’t write simplified Chinese with them, because they can only write traditional Chinese and don’t really know mandarin and they mostly speak Cantonese
This Chinese guy I’m friends with he’s so cute and THE UPMOST SWEETEST MAN I EVER MET and I want him so bad but since he goes to university I feel I got no chance. I’m a lower class, working class white woman. I’m actually a security guard for the local subway in my city and he’s going for his masters degree at Harvard and he’s got 2 years left. I feel I’m never going to win up to what he deserves. I’m also worried his parents would not accept me at all. I’m tattooed all over and very independent because I had to grow up fast and I grew up in a very broken home, my dad went to jail. Yet this Chinese friend of mine his family is amazing to one another, work hard, and crazy smart like they have super high IQ
Interesting! The Sa jiao backfires hard on western guys because acting like a baby is considered childish / spoiled behaviour. I highly recommend Chinese girls to 100% avoid sa jiao to foreigners. My theory, albeit I am not happy to say it. Chinese men seem to only look after their wife after they are confronted about it directly (sa jiao). But foreigners act from a much more engaging perspective completely eradicating the need for sa jiao. We believe that giving attention out of own free will shows love & commitment. Any requests for it makes it look platonic. In fact, you could even say the guy loses face. However they also already lost face if the girl has to grab his attention in the first place. I am thankful my girlfriend is a bit older than 30 and all that pressure and such is not a thing for her anymore. This really makes her character shine and Chinese girls in generally a lot more enjoyable :)
It's interesting to think about how supply and demand (who is available in a dating pool vs. who are the individuals of high interest) can change peoples' dating behavior and expectations of partners. In any location, those who have qualities that make them in-demand and who have more dating options have an advantage. It seems supply and demand dynamics could even supersede established gender norms and minor cultural differences. For example, would women play as hard to get in a society where the gender ratio is 30/70 male to female and all women are equally good looking? Likely not as much, and some would find an advantage in 追求 (pursuing) because the other women are complacent, shy etc. One strategy for dating success is to go where you will be in higher demand 😉
Great video. How about this... I'm an older concert level classical piano & elite runner w 1 million yuan.I have both Master's degree & PhD. Minmin is from Shenzhen, she's 36, also has PhD,& is a plastic surgeon with many businesses, obviously wealthy. We met 1 month ago on Zendate. She's flying to US & will meet me later this month here in Houston. My question is,do any of these " rules" you describe apply? I sent her 30 roses on day 2 & 30 more roses to her mom on her moms BD 2 days after that. I offered a 100k USD to her ,she said she doesn't want the money ,only a loyal,faithful loving husband ( I def will be!) I'm learning Mandarin the Chinese traditional & cultural values. I wanted to give her s beautiful diamond ring the moment we meet when she's getting off the plane..... is this a good idea? Thanks,you're so helpful ❤ this channel so much! Any thing else?
Hello madam, I like one Chinese guy soo much.. but I am Indian.. culturally we r so different.. I can manage all other things for him but about food habits... I am pure vegetarian... I have not seen meat yet.. and about chinese food habits... they are mostly non-vegetarian... snakes, mouse, dogs🙄🙄🙄and what not they eat... unimaginable for me... what should I do??? Can u give me any suggestions..🙏
There is a way of saying in Italy for this sort of visit."You must knock on the door with you feet."(Hands are busy with keeping presents")
lol thats a nice one.
Haha love it!
E come se direbbe in italiano? Mi potresti dare anche qualche esempio, per favore? Lo sto imparando e questa espressione sarebbe divertente da usare, haha
@@davidmolina5758
In italiano si dice "Devi bussare con il piede"
Mai sentita bro. Di dove sei?
Your portrayal of the mother opening the door to the empty-handed boyfriend was classic! It was the best facial expression acted out ever! Olived it! LoL
I thought I was never going to get my ear to be able to understand Chinese; turns out, I just hadn't found your videos yet! Thank you for speaking so clearly and giving pinyin for everything!
Then u go to China realize everyone is speaking in their dialect and u don't understand it anyways LOL
@@ShawkyJames Lmao honestly true
When you know Chinese is not only A language:
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, THERE ARE BLOODY MORE LANGUAGE THAN A MANDARIN, WE GOT CANTONESE, HAKKA SHANGHAINESE, MACANESE, ETC, ETC. DON’T YOU DARE SAY “I know how to speak Chinese”
lol
Btw, we have 9 pingying in Cantonese, it will be very easy for you to learn it (sarcastically)😊😊😊
"If you are 25 and you are single and even you enjoy to be single, remember your parents don't"😂😂 it's interesting
Well you wouldn't be enjoying your life without them, so how else you going to repay them?
@@WM-eg4gh who told you we should repay them? Do you think we are born already in debt? lol
@@UnknownPerson-og6hm Where does we come into this. I'm talking to one person. Ever considered that?
That is more common than thought. I'm not from Asia and in my country people used to think like that not that long ago. It's how grandmas viewed life.
@It's time Clearly you didn't get the point.
I'm not even sure why I watched this. I barely go out, let alone talk to people. I couldn't tell you what dating is like over here
What do u mean mr Batman
Lets play gamr
@@gushuiling7200 What game do you want to play?
The situations mentioned in this video happened to both daughters and sons, mothers and fathers. I acted as daughter and mother only because I'm lazy!
.......YES. I MOST CERTAINLY DO WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH A CHINESE LADY FRIEND..
A ''''CHRISTIAN'''' PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP....
STARTING WITH YOU...
THE GORGEOUS PRETTY
TEACHER !!
Hello Shuoshuo, I feel the best translation for 撒交 "SA JIAO" is a combination of "Coquettish" and "Nag" Google translate says "Coquettish" my feeling is its "nagging". LOL
You did the mom so well. The side glance, perfect.
You're so adorable. New sub here
Korean girls have the equivalent of sǎ jiāo it's like a pouty type attitude like that 😂
At least the family relationships are pretty different from Northern Europe. After we leave our parents at 18, we only see them during Christmas and couldn't care less what they think after that. Also playing hard to get doesn't work, because getting rejected once is immediately understood as being rejected forever.
rejection has a time tag. rejection once does not mean rejection forever. it is understood in most part of the world. of course northern europeans have many more sex partners on average, they may not have the patience.
@@MrLuhuazhao playing hard to get is a sign of emotional immaturity. Even if there's an expiry date on rejection, most adults in the west don't want to date someone who has the mental age of a young teenager
When you know we have Christmas instead of the Chinese tradition in Hong Kong(former English colony which is the last of British empire, retreated in 1997 and gave it back to the wrong country, which Taiwan should’ve got it bc they were the people they have contract with) and in Macau(former Portugal colony, retreated in 1993)
I'm Chinese-American, about equally competent in both languages, and I don't think the term that she uses is best translated as "playing hard-to-get." I think 矜持 is better translated as being prudish and reserved. Although unlike the word "prude," 矜持 is often (not always) used in a positive manner to highlight someone's self-control and elegance.
@@flubadubdubthegreat1272It is not immature. It's all about CULTURE. Have you ever sat down and seriously searched and learned about Asian cultures? In most Asian cultures this is the norm and it is not seen as a sign of immaturity or something. That's how things work there. Calling a certain characteristics of a society "immature" only makes you ignorant. What would you think if somebody told you that all Westerners are just playboys/whores who only cares about sex just because Westerners make several girlfriends/boyfriends throughout their lives?? Well, at least that's what more than half of the world thinks about Westerners are like, not only Asians but many more as well. You can continue to be promiscuous and call it "maturity" as you want but do not try to discredit a culture without understanding it first.
Thank you, this might be one of the most important videos I'll ever watch.
Haha!
我的妻子從來沒有撒嬌，可能山東人沒有那樣的習慣⋯⋯
Same
If many westerners watching this and think, "These practices are bizarre", I as an asian myself just wanna say, "Well that's the asian relationship" and YES it really happens.
I've been dating a Chinese woman from Shenyang for almost a year now, and now I understand that sa jiao action. She got mad at me the first time I didn't respond to it, and I initially thought she was playing around acting like a little kid, since she jokes around a lot anyway. I finally got her to agree not to get mad at me for not understanding these kinds of things without at least explaining them to me. She doesn't do this one anymore though, possibly because I honestly dislike it. It appears childish.
One thing my girlfriend does that you didn't mention (and may just be regional) is when she pretends she's mad at me for something and pretend-chokes me. When I didn't respond properly the first time to this, she got mad, and finally explained that I was supposed to act like I was being choked. I'm not sure what purpose this serves, but she likes it.
That's funny, thr pretend choking and that you were supposed to be dying of it.
Girls that can play "sa jiao" are more popular in China. However, not every man likes it. A small percent of Chinese men also hate sajiao. Some girls, especially those want to show they are independent, don't play sajiao.
Does she choke you during sex?
There's an element of helplessness or needing help. This triggers natural instincts in men to help or provide for a woman. I'm one of those that thinks it's cute and would make me think of ways to help.
Hello there! I am a Bengali boy learning Chinese. Well, for 撒嬌 we have a specific word highly used in Bengali which is "allad". I believe we have so much in common with Chinese people. But personally I don't know how will I react if my girlfriend acts like a little girl demanding what she wants haha. In Bangladesh there is a negative feeling towards this kind of attitude by men and women as they may appear selfish, not caring for their partner.
Not Chinese but American here also learning Chinese, just wanted to say your country is super interesting, hope to learn the language their and visit a lot :D
Also one of my favorite flags ngl
Bengali you're from India right?
@@vinitasingh7481 Bangladesh is a separate country, no?
In US and W Europe + etc?. there used to be moderate equivalent when women and girls were advised by tradition minded adults
to act less knowledgeable and less
competent to attract male desire to protect them, but this disappeared in 1960s with rebirth of feminist women s movement
(though child like behavior would
have been seen as shocking lack
of mental development.)
Read the post he clearly says he’s from Bangladesh.. yea there are Bengali living in india but better not assume everyone is from india. Where are you from?
My life makes a whole lot more sense after watching this video
So now you have some idea how it all works....and may have to change your screen name.
Always be Respectful and very Sincere. Remember - if she says No or she's not interested, - Don't become a stalker or become angry and annoying. Be an Adult and act like a grown-man. Women typically have more options then men, so ultimately it's their choice. You will meet someone else. Stay Safe NYC
Your audience is not only 20 somethings, and I’m sure I’m not the only person who has been married before. A lot of people are widowed/divorced and we’re more likely to be meeting someone’s children than their parents. Maybe you could do a lesson for those of us who are older? You’re such a good actor I’m sure you can do it!
great video! but there's one thing i want to correct is that 撒娇 is pronounced as 【sā jiāo】. 撒 is a word with different tone. normally we use the third tone (with the meaning of "scatter"), but here we should use the first tone to express "express"
‘sa jiao’ is probably something like Korean aegyo, I guess🙂
Yup! Or Japanese amae 甘え
Like 흥칫뿡
True
you are right. They are the same.
Shuoshuo does an excellent job explaining these specific Chinese cultural characteristics, and, she is such a sweetie!
Great video! As my wife parents don't like western food and I am also not crazy about Chinese 白酒, I always gift them with some bottles of 白酒 which I received as a gift as well😂
Then try/gift them some 米酒 (rice wine) or 梅酒(if I’m not mistaken, it’s berry wine)
(I’m just a 12 years old btw, I don’t drink wine but I guess that’s what some adults like lol)
About 7 months ago I was contacted by a Chinese woman , about 42, We spoke for hours and that was months ago, and the relationship has thrived. I feel I am in love with one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen and it looks like it is mutual. Problem I have run into is the differemce in cultures. It is a very real thing and I have inadvertantly insulted my love more than several times and am constantly apologizing. It is really very hard and constant mistakes cannot be avoided in the beginning. But after a while it has come together. I thank G-D for her patience although an argument could be made that on occasion her p
All of your videos are excellent. And the one on why you left China elevated my level of respect for you; not because of the restrictions that you exposed but because of the determination that you exhibited about you following your dreams and finding happiness in your work. Of course, this video is very educational as well - thanks for making it.
This was really interesting and entertaining.
I live in Taiwan and got married here. We've switched between Taiwan and the UK many times, but now we have 3 kids we settled down in Taiwan.
About pouting, I've found guys over here don't like it. Too childish. They seem to like woman who can earn money and look to the future.
My wife didn't really do it, but I think it's because she went to the UK to study for many years and understood what works and what does not.
The pouting is funny for a short time but In the back of my mind I do think, 'grow up.'
Meeting my parent-in-laws for the first time was funny, as I wasn't a doctor so 'Mama' wasn't so impressed in the beginning.
'Papa' he is so relaxed and was just happy his third daughter found someone :-)
That was 20 years ago and everything is great.
The key is persistence and be truthful.
Mama always wants the best for her daughters.
This video was so helpful and very entertaining! Thank you for helping me understand more Chinese language and culture!
compliments, this video is very well made and interesting!
Hi 说说，in English, some people use the phrase "a Chinese" to mean “一个中国人", but actually, it's only the words for nationalities that end with the letter "n" that can be used as nouns for people. For example, we can say an American, a Russian, a German, or a Korean, but it's not really right to say a French, a British, or a Chinese to talk about a person. For these, you need to say a French person, a British person, or a Chinese person.
Agreed. When you say “a Chinese,” it sounds offensive because Chinese can not be used as a noun. It’s like saying “a gay” and “a black.”
@@cristoferchanimak I hadn't thought of that. Some black people that I've known, however, do prefer to refer to themselves as "blacks", although it may not be, as you said, grammatically correct.
Lol your “Mum” character is just like my Chinese mother-in-law. I now have a good job, own an apartment and married her daughter but now she wants a grandchild because my wife is over 30. I’m younger and am not ready but she is putting pressure on my wife to have a kid. I guess that’s a big culture difference as here in the UK, there is no pressure to have children or get married.
I am so over people pushing others to have children. Make it stop ✋. Think hard before you do and regret it later. You don’t have to have children. ❤️
You could suggest your mother in law that she should birth thr kid snd you and your wife will be happy to take care of her...
You look so beautiful when you are acting as the mother😌
😅不知道你说的真的还是假的
当然是真的😌
Excellent video! You seem to posses a rare combination of acting talent, solid linguistic knowledge, and good presentation skills. And yes, your consummate charm does help too. You are well beyond most of the rest of the crowd. Many thanks for your work!
Sa Jiao doesn't really have word just a slang term which would be " attention getter" or the phrase" puppy eyes" also works as in when a puppy gives you that look you can't refuse even after you scratched his belly a 100 times.
You have great presence on video e.g. "exhibit A", "i will act it out"
Great explanation of Chinese dating concepts, and the vocabulary is good to know! At what point do sons and daughters tell their parents about who they like, they're pursuing or who they are dating?
撒娇 is a kind of playful flirtation. Aside from being able to provide, 撒娇 sets up an easy scenario where both parties know exactly what the other person wants--there's no guessing and the rewards for both parties are immediate. So I think 撒娇 is desirable because it's a fun, familiar way for everyone to get rewarded for their actions (a purse for her; praise for him). Of course, as you said, whether a couple likes 撒娇 is up to their own dynamic.
Many children won't talk about their romantic life with their parents, if you are pursuing someone or like someone, normally your parents won't know about that. Some people tell parents that there IS a person they are dating but they won't officially meet.
Is a hypocracy spciety..they date their classmates secretly and pretend to be friends...date old men choose by parents and pretend to be virgen....then find a guy with money and marry..get money and/or nationality and then divorce or have children depending on how lazy she is...sex is only provide to catch the guy and have babies..then forget you have a penis or find a lover..either way they dont cae as long as it dies not diminish their allowance
Thanks for clearing a few things up.
我是一個美國人從紐約州來的。我的老婆是中國人，我們家裡沒有AA制，已經在一起二十五年有三個孩子
You nailed it, your interpretations are spot on. I was laughing my ass off all throughout.
Nice video and I can learn new words!
It's really sad to see many of my friends in China which are 剩女 (leftover woman, what a cruel word btw) not because they actually are, but it's the society that says so. Some of them are really under pressure.
撒娇. I would say it is considered rude in western culture. If I had a girlfriend like that I would feel she is very rude to me. In our culture its kind of rude to ask for a gift unless it's for a special occasion like Christmas or a Birthday.
Such an underrated channel!
I like this video, I met a Chinese girl and we're getting serious, so I'm very interested in the Chinese culture, what Chinese women think... 🏆🏆🏆
I'm Russian and just FYI "撒娇" means "ластиться", "кокетничать", "капризничать", "жеманничать". As a noun - "избалованность" 🙂🙂🙂 yes, Russians love you, 说！☺️☺️
To understand people and feelings is important and smart.
Great video!! From my understanding, "sa jiao" corresponds to "aegyo" in Korean culture. We can describe it roughly as acting in a cute way in order to get attention.
What a wonderful video. I just started dating a native Chinese girl and I would have blown it. Thank you so much.
The expression you’re not sure of is „pouting“. ☺️
6:35 I think your theory is probably not far off. An attraction towards a "protector/protected" sort of relationship dynamic, is in some form quite common across the world I think, though from what I can tell, where I live, it tends to be more the girls who look for a boyfriend with attributes of a protector (tall, physically fit, etc), than guys wanting a 撒娇ing girlfriend. I think in particular the girl acting childish is not something guys here tend to be into.
Obviously things differ greatly from person to person ^^
Arriving empty handed to someone's home whether it's your significant other's parents or someone else is also considered somewhat offensive in some Eastern European cultures.
How the hell is 矜持 different than in the West?? It's EXACTLY the same. Actually, I even found out that if a Chinese girl liked me, SHE invited me. Many times they took the initiative, and if they didn't it means they were not interested in me. Maybe I got too used to be approached by the girls here and almost never initiate myself talking to them. If a girl likes you, she will come to you without you needing to pursue her.
Times really have changed.
First time I have come across your channel. This video was informative, clever and amusing! Subscribed! The "Mother" was hilarious!
Wow, I don't know that such things like good morning and good night have a huge meaning🤔
i am 26 years old i am single but i never thought about dating and my mom wanted me to get married although i been focusing on my life most friend talk to me getting a girlfriend already and somefriend on facebook or working mate
Thank you, after seeing this video. Now i fully understand my mistake with empty handed. I hope theres a video more like this
Your acting is awesome haha!!
“sa jiao” then is an expression of mood related to a dent in the relationship. no?
a way to manipulate a man into spoiling her
You should have a great future as an actor, love your dramas 😅
I’m a little bit confused, I don’t know if my “ex-boyfriend “ behavior is part of the Chinese culture or not, but we have been dating only for 1 week, and he says I don’t love him because I don’t move with him right away (he is 37). But he barely knows my Chinese name , he doesn’t bother to get to know me , how can I live with someone who I just met, and doesn’t want to know me first ?
Am I wrong ??? Am I too western ?
no, you are not
That's called a "red flag" aka, a warning sign someone has serious issues and will drag you down with them. Be careful.
TingYu Chen thanks, I really felt bad, I thought I wasn’t understanding the culture, but still something tells me that it wasn’t right
Daniel Richardson I don’t think there’s a culture on this planet where you just see someone, you date twice, you fall in love and want to live with that person right away without knowing anything about each other (we have to use a translator for those few times I wanted to order something at the restaurant). I just wanted to make sure that I was right about not accepting his love -lol
@@jimenawaltero8784 it sounds like he has control issues
This cracked me up oh my god.
Super helpful, too! Thank you
You are a very good actress!
Clever teaching and also great acting. ShuoshuoChinese is awesome
”撒娇“这两个字，我们的阿拉伯语也有，一摸一样。矜持也是
嗨，华丽，你好吗
I love China. First starting in 2006. It wasn't on my wish list but went to see the country and meet people. Loved it. Still going.
Yes, there is a cultural difference. And I know and accept it.
And you will accept Taiwan is part of the great fearsome PRC instead of it being independent,
And accepting Hong Kong people are no long hongkongers because they are moving out of Hong Kong because of political reasons
We love China, don’t we 😊😊😊(sarcastically)
Thank you for the video. Learned a lot from it.
What flowers are best as a valentines gift for my Chinese girlfriend? Thank you for your help.
I pretty much experienced some of these mentioned in the video.specially the "being baby" thing.I have been living 扬州 for about 2 years..I have a chinese girlfriend too..But me personally don't wanna meet her parents until I'm ready... relationship cultures are pretty weird in some particular contexts in China.For instance if you are a boy you must have to own a house and car to marry. Stereotype Chinese girls push their boyfriends to get married quickly.Come on!! I don't wanna meet her parents until I am ready for everything.One more thing is cuteness overloaded in China 🥴 the girls are always like a baby..but as a grown up foreign man I don't really like it sometimes.
All of them are my personal opinion. Please don't get me wrong I didn't want to hurt anyone or any culture...it is absolutely your choice what you want to do.
By the way you're pretty good actress. Specially the facial expressions of stereotype Chinese Mom😂
hahaha, best video ever!!!, Well... now I´m not sure if I´m ready to fall in love with a beautiful Chinese woman... I really love this video, you are amazing!!! .
Great video! Also, you're really funny 👍
The only thing that makes relationships harder for me in China... I always think no one gives a damn about anything else but money ¬¬
You must have money, otherwise you’re just fantasizing
6:10 so is it kinda a chinese "aegyo" or sth like that ? 😅🤦♀️
exactly！
True
Loved this video, thank you
I think 撒娇 should be two first tones (Sājiāo). You've shown it as a third and a first tone (Sǎjiāo).
3rd and 1st tone is correct.
Very helpful video, thank you
I would probably translate sa jiao as 'pout.' It's not exact but it's close.
Hi there how are you doing beautiful
Just the video i was looking for. Thank you for doing so funny 🙈
We have an equivalent of sa jiao in Polish :D It’s called foch” (pronounciation: foh).
If you have a problem with your Chinese partner, don't explain something. You have better keep a secret, but you can say that you don't say something because you don't want. This is much more efficient than explaining the problem and other psychological strategies.
i love these videos. they're so gooood!
i had a “story” with a chinese for almost 2y … it was a disaster … but u were actually super accurate! I can see her in ur video 😂
My beautiful sister. it's called pouting in the US to get what you want, lots of love, oh and by the way my 孩子们, have tried and failed, I am tiger mom haha.
Hi gorgeous how are you doing today 🌹
Chinese "sa jiao" seems to be similar to Korean "aegyo"
Yap! They are the same
Wow - this was good fun :) Well done.
I wish I had seen it earlier, I was there last week and I had no gift and my boyfriend said it was okay but I got a red packet.
How does Chinese treat interracial dating particularly between a chinese or an black person??
7:42 You should definitely consider an acting career 😃
What if she told me we can just be friends? Should i give up? Or we dont fit?
I met a girl who is from Shanghai and we seemed to hit off and talk a lot and she even asked me to a concert as our first date. We did plan a second date but we all of a sudden aren’t talking as much but she does have a lot of work to do but we are still planning to get together Friday but haven’t decided what we are doing. Haha I am a western man and may have tried holding her hand a little to early I hope she doesn’t hate me haha we laughed about it and we did hold hands and hold each other I just I hoped I didn’t embarrass her or make her uncomfortable haha hope my second date goes well! Sorry for the long comment haha
Im curious what happen next ?
Well that explains it. Thank you.
Except your crush is from Hong Kong, BECAUSE THEY KNOW ENGLISH FROM 3 YEARS OLD. And also, don’t write simplified Chinese with them, because they can only write traditional Chinese and don’t really know mandarin and they mostly speak Cantonese
This Chinese guy I’m friends with he’s so cute and THE UPMOST SWEETEST MAN I EVER MET and I want him so bad but since he goes to university I feel I got no chance. I’m a lower class, working class white woman. I’m actually a security guard for the local subway in my city and he’s going for his masters degree at Harvard and he’s got 2 years left. I feel I’m never going to win up to what he deserves. I’m also worried his parents would not accept me at all. I’m tattooed all over and very independent because I had to grow up fast and I grew up in a very broken home, my dad went to jail. Yet this Chinese friend of mine his family is amazing to one another, work hard, and crazy smart like they have super high IQ
Interesting!
The Sa jiao backfires hard on western guys because acting like a baby is considered childish / spoiled behaviour.
I highly recommend Chinese girls to 100% avoid sa jiao to foreigners.
My theory, albeit I am not happy to say it. Chinese men seem to only look after their wife after they are confronted about it directly (sa jiao).
But foreigners act from a much more engaging perspective completely eradicating the need for sa jiao. We believe that giving attention out of own free will shows love & commitment. Any requests for it makes it look platonic.
In fact, you could even say the guy loses face. However they also already lost face if the girl has to grab his attention in the first place.
I am thankful my girlfriend is a bit older than 30 and all that pressure and such is not a thing for her anymore. This really makes her character shine and Chinese girls in generally a lot more enjoyable :)
It's interesting to think about how supply and demand (who is available in a dating pool vs. who are the individuals of high interest) can change peoples' dating behavior and expectations of partners. In any location, those who have qualities that make them in-demand and who have more dating options have an advantage. It seems supply and demand dynamics could even supersede established gender norms and minor cultural differences. For example, would women play as hard to get in a society where the gender ratio is 30/70 male to female and all women are equally good looking? Likely not as much, and some would find an advantage in 追求 (pursuing) because the other women are complacent, shy etc. One strategy for dating success is to go where you will be in higher demand 😉
I always thought sa jiao meant "cuddling" and can be used for a kids and parents as well
Good video and very informative. I want to GO to Shenzhen.
I daily watch atleast one video of yours. I am able to learn Chinese.
你有 Some video on how to use 了
撒娇is funny when the couple is young. Later on becomes so dull..
We have a word in English for the male side of "sa jiao". Its called simping
Yeah,simping with the same gender.
It's actually the same in Uganda
Thank you for sharing this video! It was very interesting. I will add these new words to my Chinese notebook.
👍👍☺️
Great video.
How about this... I'm an older concert level classical piano & elite runner w 1 million yuan.I have both Master's degree & PhD.
Minmin is from Shenzhen, she's 36, also has PhD,& is a plastic surgeon with many businesses, obviously wealthy.
We met 1 month ago on Zendate.
She's flying to US & will meet me later this month here in Houston.
My question is,do any of these " rules" you describe apply? I sent her 30 roses on day 2 & 30 more roses to her mom on her moms BD 2 days after that. I offered a 100k USD to her ,she said she doesn't want the money ,only a loyal,faithful loving husband ( I def will be!)
I'm learning Mandarin the Chinese traditional & cultural values. I wanted to give her s beautiful diamond ring the moment we meet when she's getting off the plane..... is this a good idea?
Thanks,you're so helpful ❤ this channel so much!
Any thing else?
Yuuup I've been languishing in these steps for a long time haha.
This video is amazing
my girlfriend is pretty different in most parts, she even wanted to ask me out first. There are always exceptions to every rule
My father was around 40 and my mother 30-35 when they married.....
Hello madam, I like one Chinese guy soo much.. but I am Indian.. culturally we r so different.. I can manage all other things for him but about food habits... I am pure vegetarian... I have not seen meat yet.. and about chinese food habits... they are mostly non-vegetarian... snakes, mouse, dogs🙄🙄🙄and what not they eat... unimaginable for me... what should I do??? Can u give me any suggestions..🙏