I remember i was at a friends house one time and he got his leg scraped up real bad so i ran inside and told his mom and she was like, no habla ingles lo siento, and i was like MARIA I know you speak English and she yelled at me THEN MAYBE I JUST DONT WANT TO TALK TO YOU, OK? OK? so i had to tell his dad like hey man your son is hurt and your wife is mean
Cory honestly I believe fucking everything he says the way he says shit ppl don’t know and there just like fuck why didn’t I think of that Ik his shit is truw
FACTS. I caught a Distribution of Narcotics charge in 2010, my first plea offer was 3.5-7yrs. Said HELL NO. Next offer 2.5-5yrs. Said HELL NO. Switched lawyers about 3x, got it continued and continued and I said "let's go to trial". Few days before Jury selection they offered a 1-2. Took that!
@@conservat1vepatr1ot Thanks bro. It was my 1st felony charge as an adult too! That was 9yrs ago and now I'm out of the game, my home is paid off, have a beautiful fiance and a perfect 3.5yr old son! Point is, people can turn their lives around!
I went from 3 felony charges and the threat of being tried as an adult with minimum 25 years in fed prison to a year of house arrest and 3 years of probation thanks to this fucking amazing lawyer I had here in CT. He ran that shit for 2 years straight keeping me out of jail while we went from court to court. I ended up with just a single misdemeanor charge which isnt even on my record anymore because I'm over 18 now. Dude had connections and it saved my fucking life. I didn't even have to say a word in court except for thanking the judge AND my lawyer even got private trials. i dont understand it but shit was wild
EP114587 imagine thinking that, 95% of his stories have been backed by people that know/knew him, and all his criminal records line up. He talks all the time about having many regrets it’s not like he’s just trying to be cool. Get a life momo
Can IT to the next week or so ago and I was wondering if you could send me a copy of the receipt for the next week or so ago and I was wondering if you could send me a copy of the receipt for the next week or so ago and I was wondering if you could send me a copy of the receipt
If it took Joey Diaz to teach you that then you haven't been paying attention, I learned everything was money when I was 9 years old and the richest kid in my school who was an american psycho in the making stabbed another kid in the eyeball with a pencil and he was suspended for a week before coming back to terrorize the rest of us, his dad was so connected and had so much juice they even fired the teacher that intervened during the whole thing and the vice principal resigned the following year, power is as power does, whatever you can get away with that's what you are in life, contrary to what people think power doesn't make the rules, power makes the exceptions.
@@RamnaViaz boom, and its exactly this why power structures are so important when it comes to ethics and government. Power will make exceptions to your rights, potentially your freedoms, but only if used incorrectly.
@@Rocmax417 See how much of a bootlicker you are, you want me to prove what I'm saying but you dont care that Joey can prove NONE of the stories he tells.
@@Rocmax417 Watch all Martin Scorsese movies and other mob related shows. I wouldn't say all his stories are lies but over 70% is shit he heard in a movie.
home girl sitting across from uncle Joey looks like she may have been fed a edible in a 25mg package that Joey actually swapped out for a 1000mg edible. ZOMBIEFIED hahah these never get old
He is absolutely correct. Halifax County n.c. has arguably one of the,most crooked criminal justice systems in America (or did at one time) because you could spend your way out of anything but the money actually goes to the county there instead of other places where money gets slathered all over a gaggle of lawyers so maybe they are just ahead of the curve.
They tried to throw 4 at hard labor for a felony at me. I said no my lawyer freaked out. I told em strait up im no felon if I plead guilty that would be purgery and as far as im concerned that black lady prosecuter is tryin to coerse me into purgery
The reason they didn't throw the book at him is because the "victim" was a criminal with dirty hands and not because of some brilliant strategy. In most cases you are better off taking a plea deal than going to trial. The system just wants to show wins on it's record, guilt or innocence are a secondary concern.
Every case is different but they offer deals because they don't want to go to trial and they don't want to go to trial when there is a decent chance they might lose so the better the deal the more likely taking it to trial is the winning move.
Not always. It just depends. The first offer is never the best they can do. You have to be able to wait it out and negotiate and be ready to risk having to go to trial and the costs associated with doing so. And it depends on the evidence they have. If they have a lock of evidence they're not offering a good deal. But if the evidence isn't a lock, it's getting close to trial, and you have a very busy prosecutor there's always a chance of a great deal. It's such a chess game.
Coming from some one like me who has done 2 prison bids and numerous county bids, im here to say joeys take on the system is 100% facts. all built around a monetary system. no justice unless you can afford it, its crazy.
Its funny how people think criminals are absolute scum bags. You hear an interesting story from an interesting criminal and its all of a sudden genius and admirable
i got a public defender for Felony evading and dui , she was actually super good and had the connections with the DA and the judge liked her(she was very pretty) i did 4 days in jail and released no bond , 3 months of house arrest and 5 years of felony probation. already have done a year of probation they haven’t called me or drug tested me once.
He's right about the courts and how they move, itsall a game, what u know and dont know, and are u willing to gamble, now if u know u did the crime , try to get the least time possible but don't go to trial because a possible 3 year sentence on a deal could turn into 25 years ro life if u go to trial and loose, I've met alot of those guys like that when I was in the system
I love you Joey 😘 you are so great. You make my mornings ☺️ so much better...now I can go to the call center job here in Vegas and chuckle 🤭😁 to myself. The 20 something kids that work there think I am a cool lady because I was born in 64 still smoke weed and I am clean going to a methadone clinic and getting a script of alprozolam. And I indulge in recreational weed... but I tell you... I am cleaner than I have ever been. LOL 🤣🤣🤣😆
@NEGUS MBARKA nah I'm actually not hes a comedian u dumb fuck. You're just one if those people who get upset at anything someone says to do with race or gender you pussy. Cant stand people like you
How exactly is it so clear? Just because it never happened to you doesn't mean it never happened to anyone. You understand that, correct? We robbed a guy one day at a hotel room after the girls we were with disappeared for about an hour. They were down at his room and he had them smoking crack on a Coke can and they said he passed out so they left. US three guys went back down there, and 2 go inside his room where he's passed smooth out. I sat outside the door. We literally cleaned him out. Took everything out of his pockets. Took his clothes. His shoes. His cocaine. His money. And we left to go rent a room at a different hotel. It was insane! Now. Did I make that up? Since you can so clearly tell lies from truth just by listening to someone repeat their story 🤣
After they had that oj show on tv a year or 2 ago. Some guy that lived in the house know says he found a knife buried in their backyard. I think he faked it to try and make money idk what happened to the guy. There was nothing on the story after that
mike KINDRED the guy that found it called the cops . He was a contractor or landscaper doing work on the property, the detective that showed up took the evidence and instead of turning it in kept it , I think he had it cleaned and put in a display case in his home , sometime went by and either he was trying to sell it or telling someone about it or someone saw it and asked about it and the detective let the cat out of the bag , it somehow got back to his captain or a higher up and the cop got busted for withholding evidence and a bunch of other shit.
Bruh I have criminal stories that would make uncle Joey crack up. I was a criminal genius. I put circuit city out of business in Denver. But that was all in the past.
"Lemme tell ya somethin" always leads to a good story
@Prestige_Aus not half, 75% are bullshit and the last 25% are so embellished they might as well be lies
before the vid started i was waitin for him to say those exact words ... lol.
Its entertainment at the end of the day. I wouldn't read into it too much.
He got sum good ones, b/c i been to the pen and arrested several times n i dont feel like i won once
Especially from Coco 😂😂
“My parents spoke English, until the cops came”
Hahaha fucking funny I have seen this first hand buddy
Edward Kesock a
Lmao
I remember i was at a friends house one time and he got his leg scraped up real bad so i ran inside and told his mom and she was like, no habla ingles lo siento, and i was like MARIA I know you speak English and she yelled at me THEN MAYBE I JUST DONT WANT TO TALK TO YOU, OK? OK? so i had to tell his dad like hey man your son is hurt and your wife is mean
Theykilled Joel no hablo
I’d honestly love Joey to just write an autobiography. Absolutely just love every story he tells.
If you believe these stories I got a bridge to sell ya
Joe Damerell he better narrate it too
He is
Idk how to read, but I'd figure it out
Cory honestly I believe fucking everything he says the way he says shit ppl don’t know and there just like fuck why didn’t I think of that Ik his shit is truw
FACTS. I caught a Distribution of Narcotics charge in 2010, my first plea offer was 3.5-7yrs. Said HELL NO. Next offer 2.5-5yrs. Said HELL NO. Switched lawyers about 3x, got it continued and continued and I said "let's go to trial". Few days before Jury selection they offered a 1-2. Took that!
Way to go Jarran! Keep killin’ it!
@@conservat1vepatr1ot Thanks bro. It was my 1st felony charge as an adult too! That was 9yrs ago and now I'm out of the game, my home is paid off, have a beautiful fiance and a perfect 3.5yr old son! Point is, people can turn their lives around!
@@conservat1vepatr1ot 😂😂😂😂😂
@@randyjimenez3849
😝
Facing assault with a deadly weapon any advice
"I know who shot kennedy" 😭😭😭
Just let me out and I’ll tell ya 😂😂
I went from 3 felony charges and the threat of being tried as an adult with minimum 25 years in fed prison to a year of house arrest and 3 years of probation thanks to this fucking amazing lawyer I had here in CT. He ran that shit for 2 years straight keeping me out of jail while we went from court to court. I ended up with just a single misdemeanor charge which isnt even on my record anymore because I'm over 18 now. Dude had connections and it saved my fucking life. I didn't even have to say a word in court except for thanking the judge AND my lawyer even got private trials. i dont understand it but shit was wild
6ANSHEE what was it for ?
NRG lol he ain’t trying to tell you his actual crime(s) in case the feds are watching
@@Chris-P You know and I both know that last statement you just made is a falsehood.
I hope you learned your lesson mane. You were facing some real serious time homie. Youve been given a second chance. Dont waste it.💯
Itv
6ANSHEE and I’m sure your white too lol
Old saying in the legal profession:
“ A good attorney knows the law…
A great attorney knows the judge.”
That’s so fucking true…
Joey is a real street genius .
@@viracocha How do you know?
EP114587 imagine thinking that, 95% of his stories have been backed by people that know/knew him, and all his criminal records line up. He talks all the time about having many regrets it’s not like he’s just trying to be cool. Get a life momo
Can IT to the next week or so ago and I was wondering if you could send me a copy of the receipt for the next week or so ago and I was wondering if you could send me a copy of the receipt for the next week or so ago and I was wondering if you could send me a copy of the receipt
Did he just call the black lawyer "Blackula?" Lmao that is some funny shit
th-cam.com/video/EPObWLXoCpE/w-d-xo.html
😂😂🤣🤣
uncle joey taught me a lesson, money is
E V E R Y T H I N G
If it took Joey Diaz to teach you that then you haven't been paying attention, I learned everything was money when I was 9 years old and the richest kid in my school who was an american psycho in the making stabbed another kid in the eyeball with a pencil and he was suspended for a week before coming back to terrorize the rest of us, his dad was so connected and had so much juice they even fired the teacher that intervened during the whole thing and the vice principal resigned the following year, power is as power does, whatever you can get away with that's what you are in life, contrary to what people think power doesn't make the rules, power makes the exceptions.
@@RamnaViaz boom, and its exactly this why power structures are so important when it comes to ethics and government. Power will make exceptions to your rights, potentially your freedoms, but only if used incorrectly.
@@bobdole6691 it is rn with covid
Best story teller of our day
They're all lies
Jackson Winkleson prove it
@@Rocmax417 See how much of a bootlicker you are, you want me to prove what I'm saying but you dont care that Joey can prove NONE of the stories he tells.
Jackson Winkleson innocent until proven guilty
@@Rocmax417 Watch all Martin Scorsese movies and other mob related shows. I wouldn't say all his stories are lies but over 70% is shit he heard in a movie.
Joey be bringing back Bowldah stories.
home girl sitting across from uncle Joey looks like she may have been fed a edible in a 25mg package that Joey actually swapped out for a 1000mg edible. ZOMBIEFIED hahah these never get old
The prettiest girls always look stupid and clueless
Joey “i know where hoffa is” diaz
Bob Cousy slowed things down 😂😂😂
“ I know who shot Kennedy. U just gotta get me out “ 💀 😂
I don't know if you still read these comments but you make my day brother I can listen to your stories all day they're awesome much love
8:12 “I got 10 million I can do whatever i want..” *15 sec later 8:24 girl starts staring at him putting on chapstick *
taylor scott lmao Ik that’s just mere coincidence but still😂
😂😂😂😂😂
It is all about who knows who, in the law :-/
Nate Free K-9 Help that’s life
Who you know and what you can pay.
I would be in a dress doing the midnight show. Lol 😂 Joey keeps it so real
"In Bouldah" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Its is all about how much you have and who you know. The last part is so true.
Yep
This is America and I fucking love it
He is absolutely correct. Halifax County n.c. has arguably one of the,most crooked criminal justice systems in America (or did at one time) because you could spend your way out of anything but the money actually goes to the county there instead of other places where money gets slathered all over a gaggle of lawyers so maybe they are just ahead of the curve.
Joey "I know who shot Kennedy" Diaz
They tried to throw 4 at hard labor for a felony at me. I said no my lawyer freaked out. I told em strait up im no felon if I plead guilty that would be purgery and as far as im concerned that black lady prosecuter is tryin to coerse me into purgery
Hard Labor? Was this in Georgia in 1952? lol
Bro I bet this whole podcast Joey wanted to smack him for trying to talk over him🤣
Nah joey’s chill
"He didn't mean nothing by it" lol
Hes out sniffing coke somewhere in Tucson. Ahaha. I live in Tucson, Arizona and i believe that 100% 💯
I live in Tucson too, real nice little city
@anonymous
Pretty sure Arizona is fucking awful no matter where the fuck your are.
The reason they didn't throw the book at him is because the "victim" was a criminal with dirty hands and not because of some brilliant strategy. In most cases you are better off taking a plea deal than going to trial. The system just wants to show wins on it's record, guilt or innocence are a secondary concern.
@Thelondonbadger wut
Every case is different but they offer deals because they don't want to go to trial and they don't want to go to trial when there is a decent chance they might lose so the better the deal the more likely taking it to trial is the winning move.
Then there wouldn’t be a Joey Diaz pod
Not always. It just depends. The first offer is never the best they can do. You have to be able to wait it out and negotiate and be ready to risk having to go to trial and the costs associated with doing so. And it depends on the evidence they have. If they have a lock of evidence they're not offering a good deal. But if the evidence isn't a lock, it's getting close to trial, and you have a very busy prosecutor there's always a chance of a great deal. It's such a chess game.
Coming from some one like me who has done 2 prison bids and numerous county bids, im here to say joeys take on the system is 100% facts. all built around a monetary system. no justice unless you can afford it, its crazy.
Everything is a racket justice and healthcare are the top earners in the mob we call government
Its funny how people think criminals are absolute scum bags. You hear an interesting story from an interesting criminal and its all of a sudden genius and admirable
Tomorrow having my exams, haven't learned shit yet and here i am, on Uncle Joey spree
Did you pass my guy?
@@fatshaggy8159 😂😂
There needs to be a movie about joey's life. Now that is a movie I will go see.
‘Dawg let me tell you something....’ you know it’s going great 👍🏽
I would SO watch this on PBS
Uncle Joey is the best!!!
The basketball talk lmfaooo
This nigga love tellin it exactly how it is 🤣🤣
That girls expression, like she just witnessed the big bang...
I feel like most hosts don't really understand his humor :( He deserves more laughs
Rolled one smoked it, and then found myself sat here listening to joeys stories and chilling. Real interesting guy.💯
.
ULALA IS SUCH A SICK ADVENTURE GAME IT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND BLEW MY MIND
Joey needs to do audio books if he hasn't already. 🤣
This back fired on me joey!!! I’m looking at a bigger deal now
You what
Oh you mean taking legal advice from a comedian didn’t work out? Damn.
Nigga called him Blacula 😂😂😂😂
Always got time to listen to a story from joey
'DAWG, lemme tell you somethin'
I’m listening to this while I take a shit at work
Joey you should start dping audiobooks
I'd listen to him read the damn Bible for real.
Barry Sheckle 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Tremendous
what's with the background people?
Next up:
The court system on how they listen to Joey Diaz Clips
i got a public defender for Felony evading and dui , she was actually super good and had the connections with the DA and the judge liked her(she was very pretty) i did 4 days in jail and released no bond , 3 months of house arrest and 5 years of felony probation. already have done a year of probation they haven’t called me or drug tested me once.
He's right about the courts and how they move, itsall a game, what u know and dont know, and are u willing to gamble, now if u know u did the crime , try to get the least time possible but don't go to trial because a possible 3 year sentence on a deal could turn into 25 years ro life if u go to trial and loose, I've met alot of those guys like that when I was in the system
Joey "lemme tell ya somethin" Diaz
I love you Joey 😘 you are so great. You make my mornings ☺️ so much better...now I can go to the call center job here in Vegas and chuckle 🤭😁 to myself. The 20 something kids that work there think I am a cool lady because I was born in 64 still smoke weed and I am clean going to a methadone clinic and getting a script of alprozolam. And I indulge in recreational weed... but I tell you... I am cleaner than I have ever been. LOL 🤣🤣🤣😆
I'm 21, you sound cooler than my 50 y/o something friend 😅
"Blackula" cause lawyers suck ya dry and he was black 🤣😂😅 love Joey
@NEGUS MBARKA nah I'm actually not hes a comedian u dumb fuck. You're just one if those people who get upset at anything someone says to do with race or gender you pussy. Cant stand people like you
Even the great Anthony Cumia doesn't know how to handle Diaz.
When he says "I'm not being racist here", you already know what's next. 7:25
Gettin the papers Gettin the papers
If I was there I'd be sitting on the the couch doing magic tricks.
Lawyer has to give the kickback to the DA
Joey “lemme tell ya somethin” Diaz
when I grow up I want to be like Joey Diaz
I’ve always wanted to sounds like an old school bus trying to start when I laugh
Joey y ou should give away 2 free sit ins to your podcast. Like those people on the couch. Your fans would love it.
A public defender and a court appointed lawyer are the exact same thing lol
Yea I don't know what he was talking about there. Also if you get busted doing something with your friend they'll give you both shit public defenders.
Lee "hehehe" Syatt
It's clear that some of his stories are bs,
but the way he bring over the stories makes me always laugh.
Long life to you Joey
How exactly is it so clear? Just because it never happened to you doesn't mean it never happened to anyone. You understand that, correct?
We robbed a guy one day at a hotel room after the girls we were with disappeared for about an hour. They were down at his room and he had them smoking crack on a Coke can and they said he passed out so they left.
US three guys went back down there, and 2 go inside his room where he's passed smooth out. I sat outside the door. We literally cleaned him out. Took everything out of his pockets. Took his clothes. His shoes. His cocaine. His money. And we left to go rent a room at a different hotel. It was insane!
Now. Did I make that up? Since you can so clearly tell lies from truth just by listening to someone repeat their story 🤣
Same shit happened to me last time I got in trouble
Joey’s impression of an asian guy fucking gets me every time lol
Never let the truth get in the way of a good story.
On rogan one time he talked about sending Lee to rehab his to scam the insurance
whos the people in the backround just hanging out?
Most larger jurisdictions have more than one public defender.
The us justice system is not about justice at all, it's about profit.
Anthony steals chris rocks "orenthal the bus driving murderer" bit.
What a Fukn legend jo diaz jo Rogan are.
If i ever need a attorney how much do you charge Joey?
Tyrone Simpson lmfao
After they had that oj show on tv a year or 2 ago. Some guy that lived in the house know says he found a knife buried in their backyard.
I think he faked it to try and make money idk what happened to the guy. There was nothing on the story after that
mike KINDRED the guy that found it called the cops . He was a contractor or landscaper doing work on the property, the detective that showed up took the evidence and instead of turning it in kept it , I think he had it cleaned and put in a display case in his home , sometime went by and either he was trying to sell it or telling someone about it or someone saw it and asked about it and the detective let the cat out of the bag , it somehow got back to his captain or a higher up and the cop got busted for withholding evidence and a bunch of other shit.
Uncle joey! 😂
Why does youtube put ads every 3 fucking minutes
I still demand a police report on the liquid cocaine stolen from the hospital
What
Why that was at one time very common
Lee's virgin ears are are scarred forever.
Lmaooooo la ninaaa no seeeee
@anonymous la nina : the girl , no se : i dont know
Don't take the deal , COWF or take an indictment . Thanks uncle joey federal prison was fun
When I was stalling for time in a court case COVID hit
It’s awaYs A race thing. Sad but true
Not quite always. The OJ verdict proved to black america that it's money first, race second. Yay, freedom!
This is genius advice 😆
Bruh who's that in the back?
poetry
If Rodney King didn't happen would OJ still be found not guilty? The jury might have been afraid of more riots.
Edit: fixed auto fill error.
If you get a felony charge in Philly call John Feinberg. Hes expensive but good as shit. He WILL get you outta trouble!
4:14
Who the female in the background..?! 👀
The ghost of Joey's mother
ants girl.
I knew someone was gonna ask this lol
I want to go on his show and tell him some stories, especially how I beat the system and played probation.
Cool story Bra
Bruh I have criminal stories that would make uncle Joey crack up. I was a criminal genius. I put circuit city out of business in Denver. But that was all in the past.
@@craigmartin8102 wanna give the short version?
Joey "doesn't take that deal" Diaz
They tried to play Joey but Joey said nice but check this out. 😂
Holy shit He’s talking about my Lawyer Sam, this is crazy shit.