this is such an important episode! i feel like within the queer community, especially people that are out and confortable in their own skin, they have such a prejudice against people that are not out for whatever reason and it just doesn't make sense because I'm 100% sure that it took time for them to get to the point they are right now. and at the end of the day people that are not out or not fully out end up being the ones that get excluded from experiencing things and exploring more of themselves!
It took me decades to shed my internalized homophobia that was drilled into me by religion to even get to the point of acknowledging my own sexuality. Now that I’m out to myself, I’m having to go even further and learn not to care what the people I grew up with think about it. I’m able to fast track it because I am not super close with most of them anymore, I’m a loner anyway, and I will learn to be okay if they don’t love me anymore, but if you’re still really close and they are your support system and you love them dearly and need them and you know that it could all go away in an instant if they find out you’re gay, that’s a really scary step to take, even if you’ll eventually be okay. Some people never openly come out to their family (think long-term friend and roommate with one bedroom and a big bed), and that’s okay. I think it’s a decision every person has to make for themselves. It doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t serious about their sexuality or their relationship. Until homophobia is phased out of our society, this is how it will have to be for many of us. We’re working on it, that’s all we can do.
I love this conversation so much. Thank you, Mal! Coming out happens in layers and is so essential to being able to love and be in a healthy, loving relationship with yourself, first and then everyone else.
I needed to hear this. I grew up with a gay father so I never felt afraid to come out to my family thankfully, but because of that I had always put a wall up to people who were afraid of coming out. Seeing my father lose his entire family to become who he was and become the amazing person he is now made me value coming out no matter what. But it does take time, and his story or my story aren’t the only ones out there.
I was extremely lucky growing up in a very chill and accepting family. I never really "came out". One day I had a date with a girl and I was just like to my parents "okay I'm going out with a girl for today's date see you in awhile". And they didn't bat an eye, were just like "have fun, be safe!" as they said for every other date. I feel for people who don't have this comfort and safety within their family (seems to be the majority, unfortunately).
A good person can make another person good..goodness will elicit goodness in the society..if your intentions are good that's all what matters and obviously will be living in a better word...a journey through life... as always, thanks Mel..it's all in your smile
Great episode!!❤️ I appreciate different perspectives on dating partners who aren’t out. There’s not one way for it to be and it’s important for people to know that!
Such a great episode! As always! I would love to see an episode about falling in love with your best friend. Surely a good amount of our community has experienced this!
Episode idea, someone who can talk about their experience of falling in love with someone unexpectedly (a friend, coworker, gym crush etc) and dealing with that heartbreak (or not) of that situation. I feel like that’s very common and I’d be nice to hear how someone deals with that. Because I’m not sure you get over it, life just goes on. Lolol
What a relatable topic! I went through something similar with my ex girlfriend a few years ago. I wasn’t out to my parents and she was out during her teens with hers and when we started dating she’d post me and introduced me to them whenever she’s on a call with them they’d talk to me as well. But things started to get awkward when her mom stalked me on instagram and pointed out to her that I don’t post her pictures at all nothing shows that we dating. I’d post her but with a bunch of other pictures with no lovey dovey caption. But on my statuses it was clear that she’s my girlfriend, all our friends knew about her, I wasn’t ready at the time and I wasn’t given the patience or sympathy from her but slowly I was kinda forced to introduce her as my girlfriend to my sisters. Which they took very well they assumed it because I was always with her when they called. Long story short I never came out to my parents and her pressurizing me didn’t make it easier. Wish she was understanding of my situation because we come from completely different backgrounds. I’m from a very traditional African family my parents are old and strict it’s not easy and she’s European her family is more open minded but also it took time for them to come around. I’m glad you gave your girlfriend time and ya’ll thoroughly spoke about it.
such a good episode! going through something similar rn and i couldn’t agree more with Talin. Communication (and having empathy!) is key in theses situations. Thanks for this ❤️
38:28 "Tequila Tequila Tequila, Emotions Emotions Emotions" 😂 This is such a topical issue to navigate, when one person is out and the other isn't and navigating that. My takeaway from Talin's story is to keep communicating and checking in. Wow that woman is a real cat lady with portraits of cats on her chest😄 52:23 "The latter babe" You don't pause...lol
The only negativity I've seen are in the political episodes which is understandable. The rest though it's so positive. I always recommend this podcast especially to later in life lesbians that could use this to relate to/find hope etc. Im so grateful for this podcast and Mal you kill it every episode and your laugh is the best and so infectious. Thanks to Mathilde and all the lesbians/guests that work on this podcast! You are all incredible!
This is reminding me (sorta) of a woman that I met on Match. We lived an hour apart in two New England cities, and we quickly got so cute and intomate. Messages became DM'ing, which became hour-long phone calls. Some nights, we would work on separate paintings while talking and then share our artistic progress. Then, she said thar it would feel that (pansexually) she is living a liie if I wasn't out more as trans. The next day, she apologized for pressuring me, and says that our chemistry is too strong to just be friends, so goodbye. I saw her on OKCupid a month later (where terms like "pansexual" was available, and she wasn't out herself.
You should while you can. Trust me I came out to my family at 38…. After I had a baby and everything…and they’re very conservative and not particularly accepting, ( except my mom and one of my brothers), but I can tell you it’s worth it
You should while you can. Trust me I came out to my family at 38…. After I had a baby and everything…and they’re very conservative and not particularly accepting, ( except my mom and one of my brothers), but I can tell you it’s worth it
I've felt second hand shame and for me, I would not be with someone who isn't out or not comfortable with their queerness. If I were Mal's ex, I think I would have just left as soon as I found out. Totally respect everyone's journey but that's not a partner for me.
this is such an important episode! i feel like within the queer community, especially people that are out and confortable in their own skin, they have such a prejudice against people that are not out for whatever reason and it just doesn't make sense because I'm 100% sure that it took time for them to get to the point they are right now. and at the end of the day people that are not out or not fully out end up being the ones that get excluded from experiencing things and exploring more of themselves!
It took me decades to shed my internalized homophobia that was drilled into me by religion to even get to the point of acknowledging my own sexuality. Now that I’m out to myself, I’m having to go even further and learn not to care what the people I grew up with think about it. I’m able to fast track it because I am not super close with most of them anymore, I’m a loner anyway, and I will learn to be okay if they don’t love me anymore, but if you’re still really close and they are your support system and you love them dearly and need them and you know that it could all go away in an instant if they find out you’re gay, that’s a really scary step to take, even if you’ll eventually be okay. Some people never openly come out to their family (think long-term friend and roommate with one bedroom and a big bed), and that’s okay. I think it’s a decision every person has to make for themselves. It doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t serious about their sexuality or their relationship. Until homophobia is phased out of our society, this is how it will have to be for many of us. We’re working on it, that’s all we can do.
I love this conversation so much. Thank you, Mal! Coming out happens in layers and is so essential to being able to love and be in a healthy, loving relationship with yourself, first and then everyone else.
I needed to hear this. I grew up with a gay father so I never felt afraid to come out to my family thankfully, but because of that I had always put a wall up to people who were afraid of coming out. Seeing my father lose his entire family to become who he was and become the amazing person he is now made me value coming out no matter what. But it does take time, and his story or my story aren’t the only ones out there.
Loved this episode! Hello from Australia 🇦🇺…. Really loved how insightful and kind Talin was to her partner. Great episode
I learned so much❤❤❤❤❤your show 😊
I was extremely lucky growing up in a very chill and accepting family. I never really "came out". One day I had a date with a girl and I was just like to my parents "okay I'm going out with a girl for today's date see you in awhile". And they didn't bat an eye, were just like "have fun, be safe!" as they said for every other date. I feel for people who don't have this comfort and safety within their family (seems to be the majority, unfortunately).
A good person can make another person good..goodness will elicit goodness in the society..if your intentions are good that's all what matters and obviously will be living in a better word...a journey through life... as always, thanks Mel..it's all in your smile
Great episode!!❤️ I appreciate different perspectives on dating partners who aren’t out. There’s not one way for it to be and it’s important for people to know that!
This might be the first time that a guest's laugh and smile could compare with Mal's on the Fabulous Scale - Kudos to Talin!
Such a great episode! As always! I would love to see an episode about falling in love with your best friend. Surely a good amount of our community has experienced this!
What a great story about Matilda coming out to her grandpa! So sweet!
Episode idea, someone who can talk about their experience of falling in love with someone unexpectedly (a friend, coworker, gym crush etc) and dealing with that heartbreak (or not) of that situation. I feel like that’s very common and I’d be nice to hear how someone deals with that. Because I’m not sure you get over it, life just goes on. Lolol
Great guest and relatable story!
This is one of my favorite episodes yet!!
Thank you for your show from Germany! Love the diversity of topics, lives led, dreams and stories
What a relatable topic! I went through something similar with my ex girlfriend a few years ago. I wasn’t out to my parents and she was out during her teens with hers and when we started dating she’d post me and introduced me to them whenever she’s on a call with them they’d talk to me as well. But things started to get awkward when her mom stalked me on instagram and pointed out to her that I don’t post her pictures at all nothing shows that we dating. I’d post her but with a bunch of other pictures with no lovey dovey caption. But on my statuses it was clear that she’s my girlfriend, all our friends knew about her, I wasn’t ready at the time and I wasn’t given the patience or sympathy from her but slowly I was kinda forced to introduce her as my girlfriend to my sisters. Which they took very well they assumed it because I was always with her when they called. Long story short I never came out to my parents and her pressurizing me didn’t make it easier. Wish she was understanding of my situation because we come from completely different backgrounds. I’m from a very traditional African family my parents are old and strict it’s not easy and she’s European her family is more open minded but also it took time for them to come around. I’m glad you gave your girlfriend time and ya’ll thoroughly spoke about it.
such a good episode! going through something similar rn and i couldn’t agree more with Talin. Communication (and having empathy!) is key in theses situations. Thanks for this ❤️
communication. always!
thanks for this episode, I needed it!
Can’t wait to check out her Honey I’m Home Podcast!
thanks for this episode it was a great listen!! and happy international lesbian day 🥳
Talin and Priz are so dope 🔥 loved this episode. Their pod is great too, highly recommend 💯
Thank you for this episode. ❤
Great episode. Loved it.
Thanks for that episode ! I love your podcast !!!🏳🌈
Amazing episode ❤️
Pls have ashley gavin on i think everyone would love that
38:28 "Tequila Tequila Tequila, Emotions Emotions Emotions" 😂 This is such a topical issue to navigate, when one person is out and the other isn't and navigating that. My takeaway from Talin's story is to keep communicating and checking in. Wow that woman is a real cat lady with portraits of cats on her chest😄 52:23 "The latter babe" You don't pause...lol
The only negativity I've seen are in the political episodes which is understandable. The rest though it's so positive. I always recommend this podcast especially to later in life lesbians that could use this to relate to/find hope etc. Im so grateful for this podcast and Mal you kill it every episode and your laugh is the best and so infectious. Thanks to Mathilde and all the lesbians/guests that work on this podcast! You are all incredible!
This is reminding me (sorta) of a woman that I met on Match. We lived an hour apart in two New England cities, and we quickly got so cute and intomate. Messages became DM'ing, which became hour-long phone calls. Some nights, we would work on separate paintings while talking and then share our artistic progress.
Then, she said thar it would feel that (pansexually) she is living a liie if I wasn't out more as trans. The next day, she apologized for pressuring me, and says that our chemistry is too strong to just be friends, so goodbye.
I saw her on OKCupid a month later (where terms like "pansexual" was available, and she wasn't out herself.
Hello
Love this episode
Love from Nigeria 🇳🇬
Your hair is awesome.. you look beautiful
Wow... my grandfather is also 92 and also my favourite person... and I'm still not sure if I'll ever tell him!
You should while you can. Trust me I came out to my family at 38…. After I had a baby and everything…and they’re very conservative and not particularly accepting, ( except my mom and one of my brothers), but I can tell you it’s worth it
You should while you can. Trust me I came out to my family at 38…. After I had a baby and everything…and they’re very conservative and not particularly accepting, ( except my mom and one of my brothers), but I can tell you it’s worth it
ooooo i like this already
Love happy stories
6:04 it’s the ciiiiircle of lifeeeee
Your guest was DELIGHTFUL! Could she be any cuter? I mean.
she could not!!
I've felt second hand shame and for me, I would not be with someone who isn't out or not comfortable with their queerness. If I were Mal's ex, I think I would have just left as soon as I found out. Totally respect everyone's journey but that's not a partner for me.
is girlie in rez ball? i can literally find nowhere on the internet to confirm or deny this
don't believe so... is that a show? Talin is a stylist, not an actor!
No loofah no washcloth just soap on skin
Love the pod hate the long ads 😢
They’re mostly skip-able and they deserve to be compensated for this hard work
Agree 👍
@@Raddiebaddie thank you guys for the support! it's the only source of income for the podcast!
My favorite episode ever. Not a fan of the ads, though.
If you want a project like this to exist, the people working on it deserve to be compensated.
dude it’s 30 seconds with skips.. how do expect them to be paid?
@@mvnii thank you guys for the support! it's the only source of income for the podcast!
LOVE ME SOME TALIN🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
SHES THE BEST!!
Oh hey Mal can you fix her insta handle you missed the letter с, so it took me а sec to find her!
oooops fixed thank you!
@@MadeItOutPodcast no problem love! Just trying to help others that might want to checkout her content/podcast etc! 😊