I'm guilty of this sin . I thought i was venting but in reality I was spreading gossip. Lord, please forgive me and mend all the broken hearts I've caused. Amen!
Youre not alone, I am going to repent from it today, yesteray I share information about someome who shouldn't be share , I said I saw her crying and I'm not sure if nots gossip but it doesn't involved me
WHEN YOU ARE DOING GOOD OR HELPING ANYONE ITS GOOD THEN, AS LONG AS YOU ARE NOT CAUSING HARM TO OTHERS. SOMETIMES I REALLY COMPLAINT ABOUT MY SIS IN LAW, AND KNOW THINGS I UTTER ARE NOT NICE, BUT HER INSULTS TO US HURT A LOT. JESUS WILL UNDERSTAND THE MOST INNER PROBLEMS INSIDE PEOPLE HEART.
@@oliverbellh3633 Another incorrect interpretation by Protestants. And he said, “Brethren and fathers, listen: The God of glory appeared to our father Abraham when he was in Mesopotamia, before he dwelt in Haran," (Acts 7:2)
@@oliverbellh3633call no man Father, for you have one Father in Heaven. My dad is my biological father and I call him father. My priest is my spiritual father and I call him father. Even St. Paul calls himself a father (like a priest) in 1 Corinthians 4:15 Even if you had ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel.
@@IgnacioAgramontethis reminds me of my younger stepsister (we’re Hispanic btw so it’ll be considered “normal”) some things she’s said and done to me have been hard and she often threatens to tell mom on me for personal reasons, gonna make this long story short, she was controlling, invading my personal stuff, giving me silent treatment, etc, and one time she got into a love relationship with one of her cousins, and yet whenever I told her off, I’m essentially “talking back and disrespecting her”. And she’s told me not to tell mom otherwise “i’ll end up starting problems between me and her”. When me and my mom were together alone helping each other clean, she would ask me if my younger stepsister was doing what she did to me, I confidentially told her the truth. Mom then installed a ring surveillance doorbell for evidence in case my stepdad defended my younger stepsister (she was temporarily the favorite of the family). When she got finally told off for what she’s done, she would play victim, stay angry at me and my sister, and even cry to her mother living in Mexico telling her that “the family is traumatizing her and scaring her” even though we were not. I’m even scared to introduce her to my boyfriend in case she starts saying hurtful stuff about him, however as of 4/13/2024, she no longer lives with us after like what, 3 years and nearly 3 months? I tend to feel bad and call myself a chismosa but mom reassured me that what she’s done is never my fault and told me that I should not feel the need to cover anyone’s BS to feel liked or loved. I cried while being reassured but i digress.
Gossip drove my son from the church when he was a kid. He literally veiws the church as a pit of petty hostile people. I wish more people were aware of the consequences of gossip.
We need a channel dedicated to gossip alone. Gossip destroys families, relationships, communities. It is so poisonous that it destroys a person's life. God bless you Fr. Mike
I am someone who has been gossiped about for 2 yrs at church. It gets so bad when I volunteer, I sometimes go home and cry. Thing is, I volunteer for God, not them. I try and make friends and help, but am pretty much an outcast because I do not gossip. Some of the cruelest people can be those who go to Mass, Take communion and then gossip about you. All I can do is pray that God gives me strength
This was so deep... Everyday Betrayal = Gossip. I honestly didn't know the difference between venting and gossiping and I believe many people believe the two words are interchangeable. Thanks for this clarification and God bless your online ministry. May hearts and souls be touched by the Word of God.
This came at just the right time! Thank you. As a recovering blabbermouth, I need to be more comfortable keeping silent about other people's matters, as well as practicing discretion on what I say.
thank you for differentiating "letting it out" vs "getting someone on your side." The former happened to me recently. When a friend and I had a disagreement, I had to vent it out to someone else not because I wanted them to take my side, but because I just didn't know what to do and needed help. And I was okay venting to that specific someone because I knew they wouldn't take either side, but acknowledge both sides & comfort me at the same time. Sadly, I AM guilty of the latter, of trying to get someone on my side against a certain person... That wasn't cool of me, and tbh I still feel some pain from that every now and then. But I am grateful for a forgiving God who gives unlimited chances to try again. And I'm thankful for this video, and grateful to know the difference between venting and gossipping. Thank you, Father Mike
Thank you Fr Mike. Gossiping is a very disgusting habit, it destroys people & i can testify as i am a victim of church gossipers. I used to serve at church but one day i became the subject of malicious gossip of the same people who are also serving the church. However, i can face God because my conscience is clean but it has burned me alive at the stake, i turned my back at the church, stopped serving & stopped going to mass even, i thought what'sthe use anyway, for 25 years i was away from the church, i even tried going to mediums, started reading about new age religion but God never left me. To cut the story short & gladly, i returned back to the church this year, started attending the mass again, went back to confession again & started praying the holy rosary, chaplet of divine mercy & chaplet to st michael, etc again. If God wants me to serve again- it might take a lot of convincing, for now, im at peace to just pray, Our blessed mother never let go of me, i even dreamt of her one night telling me, it's time to go home, i didn'teven realize it was her until i received a picture of the immaculate concepcion from the Marian fathers. People need to understand especially those who are serving the church that gossip itself is a mortal sin, it kills not physically but spiritually not just the victim itelf but also the person who gossips & spreads lies, it is the work of the devil. I have decided that I will never leave Jesus & our blessed mother again for Judas & sadly, there are so many Judases in our church these days so i will stay praying in peace & quite, alone with God.
I'm new to your channel and I'm not actually catholic, but you really hit the head on the nail with this discussion about the difference between gossip and venting. I really appreciate this message
Women often carry the reputation for gossip, but even men should hear this difference between gossip and venting! Now I'll be going to reconciliation and apologizing to my roommate for gossiping...
This video is still providing great guidance 7 years after it was recorded. I needed to hear it in 2023. As a manager, I routinely discuss employee performance, aptitude, and attitude with two colleagues. On occasion, during legit conversations, we slide into sinful gossip and slander. Ugh. I better tape that verse on my forehead so I don't forget. Or better yet, on my computer screen (for zoom calls).
This really resonated with me because this is the main reason why I separated myself from my in-laws. They are Catholic, and so in marriage, I converted. They judged me and mistreated me even before I married my husband, only knowing me for about 8 months. My husband and I met somewhat later in life and so we knew we were ready, so we moved quickly. He comes from a huge tight-knit family and they are very judgmental. About 15 years into the marriage, after my mother in law passed, I stopped attending family functions because I’m just done. The gossip and tension has taken a toll on me so I just stopped attending family events. I’m done.
I'm so sorry... Dealing with gossipers can be sooo extremely draining. I really feel you when you say "I'm done". I can't imagine how it feels to have to deal with gossiping from extended family that you have to see somewhat regularly.. for me it's a few people from church and it's exhausting, but I get to distance myself since we aren't related. So I can only imagine how much worse what you're describing is. Recently, I've started praying a lot against gossiping, for those that do it, and for me to not engage in it either by my silence or otherwise. I wish you all the best. God bless you!!🤗💗
A sin is a sin When we gossip we realize it by The Holy Spirit convicting us and then we as God for forgiveness I am always praying that God help me to stop gossiping in Jesus Name 🙏🏾. Praying for all who read this or listen to this and is gossiping 🙏🏾
I've been struggling with gossip for a while and I always end up telling myself "well... I'm just venting". Of course this video would come up in my suggestions. Thank you!
This video is super helpful. I asked AI about this last week and I'm really happy to come across this video from Fr Mike. It helps to further make things clear. For anyone who needs it, here's what I got as a response from AI as the difference between venting and gossiping: "Gossiping is the act of casually talking about someone or something, often sharing unverified or personal information, rumors, or sensational details. It's usually done in an informal setting, like conversations with friends, family, or coworkers. Gossiping often involves: 1. Sharing personal or private information without consent 2. Spreading rumors or unverified stories 3. Talking about someone behind their back 4. Focusing on sensational or juicy details Gossiping can be harmful, as it can: 1. Damage reputations 2. Spread misinformation 3. Create conflict or drama 4. Erode trust and relationships Here's a distinction: Gossiping: - Sharing the story with the intention of exposing or humiliating the person - Focusing on sensational or juicy details - Sharing with people who don't need to know or aren't directly involved Venting: - Sharing your feelings and experience with someone you trust - Processing your emotions and seeking support - Focusing on your own perspective and reactions To ensure you're venting and not gossiping: 1. Share with someone you trust, like a close friend or family member. 2. Focus on your feelings and reactions, rather than attacking the person. 3. Avoid sharing unnecessary details or spreading the story further. Remember, venting can be therapeutic, but be mindful of your intentions and audience.It's essential to process your emotions and share your experience with trusted individuals without crossing the line into gossiping. Remember, venting is about seeking support and guidance, not about spreading the story or harming the person's reputation. When sharing with friends and family, focus on your feelings and reactions, using "I" statements, like: - "I feel disrespected and shocked by his behavior." - "I'm concerned about his wife and family." - "I'm disappointed in his lack of integrity." Avoid making statements that could be perceived as gossiping, like: - "You won't believe what he did!" - "He's such a terrible person!" By sharing your experience thoughtfully, you can: - Process your emotions - Seek support and guidance - Maintain a clear conscience And yes, praying for the person and their family is a wonderful idea. It shows empathy and a willingness to see them grow and change." Hope this helps! "Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." Ephesians 4:29 NLT "Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips." - Psalm 141:3 (NIV) "The one who guards their lips guards their soul, but the one who speaks rashly will come to ruin." - Proverbs 13:3 (NIV) "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." - Colossians 4:6 (NIV)
My coworker and I vent a lot to each other about our manager because we both have to deal with him. It’s no secret about how he behaves - I mean no secret between us. Now I’m wondering if that’s really gossip if we just vent between ourselves. Ugh. Some days I feel like everything I do is a sin. Then I fall into the sin of scrupulosity. Maybe Fr. Mike should do a video on that sin.
Scrupulosity is generally not a sin because it's not something you can generally control (a sin requires you to be able to choose not to do something, and people usually don't choose to have extreme anxiety about their actions being sinful). You might want to look up what scrupulosity is; Catholic Answers has some good resources. Scrupulosity can be very difficult to avoid and may even require external help. Praying for you!
WOW... so what we need to hear. It's so hard to figure out when you have a major problem. Sometimes it's not about helping someone but trying to find answers to what to do
Thank you for this Father Mike. I, too, struggle with this subject. I don't know the difference between gossiping or sharing information. I confess to gossiping every day because I get confused. I guess I gossip everytime I speak about someone else good or bad. I will definitely set a guard before my mouth and gatekeeper at my lips and think before I speak.
Thank you for this Fr. Mike! I found out the hard way what the difference is. I went and read on the life of St. Monica of Hippo and how she poured out her heart and shared her secrets only with God. I'm endeavoring to follow her example and already, I feel better about talking to Him alone whenever I have problems I can't share.
This is the video I needed in my feed today. There's been problems with a coworker, and the group discussion of these problems have made me uneasy as to whether it's gossip or not. Thank you Father Mike.
I ask in prayer for the Lord to fortify and cleanse my tongue everyday. This I believe to be a huge struggle for many of us. I have to practice thinking before I even open my mouth. Not my super power...
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 01:56 🗣️ Everyday betrayal can manifest as gossip, sharing private details and wounds of others without their consent. 02:52 🚫 Gossip should not be disguised as venting or processing; genuine venting seeks support and care, while gossip recruits others against someone. 05:10 ❤️ Choose words that build up and help others, being cautious with what you share and seeking discretion and charity in conversations. 06:05 🙏🏼 Daily prayer: "Set a guard, O Lord, before my mouth, a gatekeeper at my lips" (Psalm 141:3) to speak only what unites and truly helps others. Made with HARPA AI
I can relate to that. I used to work at the Public Library. Been there for 9 years. I loved the job and the people I served, but I ended up quiting because of too much gossip on me by my co-workers.
Father. Mike your wisdom is astounding,Holy Spirit shines from you And you have such a sense of humour in comparison to many priests i hope thats not gossip...
Thank you Father Mike - this clears up that fine line of talking about someone to help them, or talking about them unfavourably to their harm. The later hurts them and ourselves rather than helping. Thank you for that insight. God Bless.
Great video done on an issue that goes mostly undetected. A lot of good saints get tangled up in the gossip web. Hurt people hurt people. We need healing and reconciliation. Thank you!! God bless you!!
Fr.mike like always what great message you give us...i do remember a prayer my mom always taught me in spansh "Cross of Jerusalem talk and respond for me calm the bad hearts that are against me" when I am involved in gossip I say the prayer in my mind and I kid you not but the person gets distracted or changes the subject!
I always feel this need to "vent" I don't though I keep it all to myself. I don't have anyone that I can talk to about my problems that I've had over the years and this last few months it has gotten so much harder. I was this close to just "vent" on social media but I had seen the thumbnail for this video a few months ago but I avoided it because I thought that I could just not vent or gossip but today I had to just look it up to give me strength to not give in and I am so glad that I did! I have been renewed with your words Father Mike! I will say this prayer all day every day. Thank you and God bless you Father Mike!
this is such an effective and helpful message sent from Jesus through you, thank you Father Mike 🙏 eye opening perspective on such a difficult topic to tackle
I have recently have been involved in a conflict with an organization and words truly can be toxic and I have to say I have trouble with what I should say to others because so much goes around. I don't want to talk bad about people, but I have heard so many lies about other individuals and even myself. It's just difficult trying to explain it in a way that doesn't put the other person down. Prayers are needed!
This is a major goal of mine. Working as a waitress provides a great challenge, and I'm not perfect at avoiding gossip, but I am getting ever better. Gossiping is cowardly and I'm not about that life. Finding more productive ways to vent and to respond to others' venting, well, it's a little way I hope to change the world. Encourage courage, not cowardice.
Fr Mike, Please do a video on proper dress for women going to church! I'm dressing modessly but would like to know your thoughts and guidelines on the subject. Thank you, Sherry 60-year-old Just covereted from no religion and made my Confirmation & 1st Holy Communion at the Easter Vigil !!!
Awe, man, absolutely! I like the analogy - everyday betrayal. "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me" - the gossip that changed a generation ;) Our words are the foundation of who we are and how we share our hearts! Thank you, Fr Mike!
I love that "Our words are the foundation.....etc" It's simply stated and yet profound. Thank you. I am now writing it on a card and adding it to my wall, so i see it everyday. As a reminder to live more consciously.
So venting is a reaching out and gossiping is recruiting to be on your side against that person....life changing!! sometimes in communion ill say put a stone on my tongue so i speak little, i think i read this in saint faustinas diary and i started saying it bcuz i got convicted reading james but james is right we all dragged Jesus to the cross so who am i to judge and be unmerciful that scripture gets me everytime like a knife thank you father i appreciate this in all u do as a preist
Yes, remember that "gossib" has been thw one thing that has helped women to be safe around men for ages. You should always think if the info is actually helpfull and important as the creatoe of this video said!
I think we all struggle with this. Sometimes if I felt I had a raw deal with someone I might vent to a close colleague and often it helps me feel better when the colleague tells me of others' similar experiences with this person. Having listened to Father, I need to think twice about this. This channel is so useful! Thank you Father!
Fr. Mike, do you have a podcast? I could listen to you all day! Thank you for pointing out things I wouldn't really consider "wrong." And thank you for referencing the Bible or alluding to biblical times; it really helps me when I do my bible journaling.
+Kevin Mccullouch That's what I was thinking and it does help a bit. It seems to me the difficult part is having the courage to confront the person gossiping to you, and there is a time and place for that as with everything. I've been put in that situation before and thought others shedding a light on it would help out as well! Peace and Blessings!
+Zachary Wierschem your are exactly right about the need for courage in the situation. Pray to the Holy Spirit for the courage Zachary. It will be given to you. God Bless.
Since this has happened to me pretty badly at my previous workplace-here is what I focused on. If people are gossiping about you, that means they have nothing better to focus on. They're boring. If you're the of focus of their lives, that says a lot about the state of their own lives.
Thanks for your question, Zachary! We've added it to our list of #askfrmike requests! Please know of our prayers and pray for all of us at Ascension Press if you think of it!
how about posing it as a question in order to get them thinking, perhaps thereby opening the door to some deeper yet friendlier discussions? for example, how about asking one of these (while looking and sounding genuinely curious about their perspectives)? "how does that saying go? is it 'those who gossip to you will also gossip about you'?" "how long is it okay to talk about someone behind their back before it becomes gossip, exactly?"
downloaded all your videos, converted to one giant mp3... after i have an hour of silence when i wake up i play my massive Fr Mike mp3 with lord of the rings music playing quietly in the background. #quirkyconfessions. great video Fr Mike!
Who doesn't need to hear this information? Great job Fr. Mike. 141 3 (and part of 4) is now on a post-it-note attached to my work monitor. It is weird how this is in my feed when I need it most.
Thank you so much for covering this topic! I 've been wondering about the difference between venting and gossiping for weeks, after reading something from Mother Angelica about gossip. She said something along the lines of "If it doesn't help the other person, don't say it." But that doesn't leave much room if another person is driving you crazy and you want to complain! So thank you for expanding on it, and thank you for finding a prayer for it. I know i'll be using it!
When I'm in a conversation and it's usually when someone is having a problem with someone else and I feel we are talking about the behaviors and we are trying to process and analyze the situation. I some point I will say "Lord I am not gossiping about this person I am concerned about the behaviors that is causing this person pain and suffering".
its Fr mike saying ain't nobody got time for that for me😂😂😂😂... thank you Fr... you are always such a delight and I learn a whole lot from your messages..
I've always been told gossiping is wrong but I often have a hard time realizing the line between gossip and talking about somebody else. For instance, if I heard that so-and-so was pregnant out of wedlock, spreading this information would definitely be gossip. But what if I am speaking to one of my friends about a mutual friend who has behaved in a negative light, for instance, changing their character due to an unhealthy relationship, is this gossip? I want to refrain from gossiping but I just have a lot of trouble knowing where the boundaries lie.
@@bluej6800 I don’t understand this. Sometimes I need opinions on how to respond so i’ll ask my sister on advice on a situation. How is that gossiping?
@@lauraaah.4343 you already know the answer to your question, just turn it around as if you were on the receiving end of being discussed, how would that feel to you. That’s all I can say because I don’t know you or the details of what you’re referring too.
My sibling just got out of an abusive relationship and they vent to me often...but it is difficult to tell where the line is between venting about all the little everyday experiences of oppression/abuse and bashing their ex. I will try to pray that prayer/verse and for a way to share it with my sibling. Thanks for touching on the issue.
That’s not venting, that’s gossiping, and it keeps them stuck, because all they do is gossip about the other person instead of solving their problem once and for all.
The concern of needing to run for your life (as many have to do) is real. I reached the conclusión that just professionals understand the danger of a toxic relationship.
@@gfitz6001 If all you continue to do is talk about the abuse and yet you stay in it, month after month, and just vent without ever doing anything about it, then (I think) it becomes gossiping. That’s what I was referring too. No one should be abused in any form. Did you read the paragraph that I was referring too when I made my comment? I agree it’s sometimes hard to tell the difference between venting and gossiping, and I just gave my opinion, I’m certainly no expert. Best of luck to you.
This is the story of my life.m, Father. The older aunties who gossip is the reason why all youths stopped attending the prayer meetings & the reason why I left the church for 5 yrs. Edit : My Mum's lack of boundaries does n't help one bit either.
I had a bad car accident and a friend from high school told people I was addicted to drugs. I was so hurt by that and have had trouble getting over it because she told so many people right before my class reunion. I found out the hard way she wasn't a true friend.
IT WAS ALSO A BLESSING IN DISGUISE...YOU GOT TO SEE HER TRUE INTENTIONS AND FEELINGS FOR U!!..HAD SHE NOT DID THAT U WOULD HAVE BEEN FRIENDS WITH A FAKE PERSON FOR POSSIBLY YEARS ON
Thank you so much for this, it helps me to understand why it feels so crappy when others spread your info. I like to be open and share my business but lately i am seeing that it is being used to judge me.
Oh Fr.Mike I must say evrything that u mentioned are all nice-- honestly yer talk, this spiritual talk actually is like having a LONGSILOG (Longganisa, Sinangag at Itlog) for breakfast learned a lot. Thank U n God bless u!😃👌❤❤❤❤❤
I try my best not to get involved in gossip because it can be very hurtful and damaging. At times I find myself getting involved in it (actually doing the gossiping or listening to it) and I always feel horrible afterwards.
@Marci HF true sometimes One is caught up in the middle! But am trying to be more cautious & i Can now differentiate friends who incite more gossips than others! So i try to mention often about gossip that am confessing often about gossip etc or atleast change the topic or only talk positive stuffs, try to talk on behalf of the non-present party.. its helping abit but hard.. otherwise avoid such people & pray for Them. Some you talk with & your spirit feel messed with!
When you said “mostly at church” -- you have that right 🤦🏼♀️ It actually happened “in” confession ….. and my reply was “holy ___” about four times - obviously, we both were wrong!
These are subjects not super fresh on my mind because I’ve been isolated for so long. I know that gossip in any meeting of people is working in reverse to an effective organization. When are around people, we need to only engage in positive, uplifting conversations. That brings one and all up to a higher level.
As much as I appreciate Fr. Mike’s other videos, I actually think this one is more confusing than helpful. It still seems to me that venting is just a more socially acceptable word for gossiping. Personally, I find Dave Ramsey’s definition of gossip more helpful than attempting to make a distinction between venting and gossiping, which are really the same thing. Dave defines gossip as “When a negative is discussed with anyone who can’t solve the problem.” I can understand that sometimes there is a need to talk about another person in order to solve a problem, but I wouldn’t call that venting. Instead I would call it problem solving, or perhaps seeking advice. Just my two cents, from a fellow sinner who struggles with gossip and knowing where to draw the line.
That's very interesting! I never looked at it that way. I do think that at times we need to talk to someone trusted (like mother or sister) just to get a load off our chest even though they can't solve the problem. Like sharing our feelings if someone mistreated us. Of course you should confront the person about their mistreatment too. Even venting can be excessive if we do it in front of everyone we know. Gossip is more like "airing someone's dirty laundry" that we have no business doing...ever.
@@magnolia8626 exactly! I do believe not every talk about other people has to be about solving problem. We should be able to express our frustration and seeking consolation in our trusted friends and family. Sometime, talking about other people problem in the spirit of concern for them can be good too. Gossiping is really when you talk about other's people business in a spirit of demeaning, creating opportunities for other people to attack the person.
I'm guilty of this sin . I thought i was venting but in reality I was spreading gossip. Lord, please forgive me and mend all the broken hearts I've caused. Amen!
you're not alone in this! May God give you great peace and comfort.
Youre not alone, I am going to repent from it today, yesteray I share information about someome who shouldn't be share , I said I saw her crying and I'm not sure if nots gossip but it doesn't involved me
I feel so convicted!
Me too! Please JESUS, FORGIVE ME THESE SINS! Wash me clean with Your Most Precious Blood!
Beautifully put. "Set a guard, oh Lord, before my mouth, a gatekeeper at my lips." Psalm 141
I've actually always struggled with this subject, it's so nice to have a clear idea of what's acceptable and what's not. Thank you Father!
WHEN YOU ARE DOING GOOD OR HELPING ANYONE ITS GOOD THEN, AS LONG AS YOU ARE NOT CAUSING HARM TO OTHERS. SOMETIMES I REALLY COMPLAINT ABOUT MY SIS IN LAW, AND KNOW THINGS I UTTER ARE NOT NICE, BUT HER INSULTS TO US HURT A LOT. JESUS WILL UNDERSTAND THE MOST INNER PROBLEMS INSIDE PEOPLE HEART.
Call no man father
@@oliverbellh3633
Another incorrect interpretation by Protestants.
And he said, “Brethren and fathers, listen: The God of glory appeared to our father Abraham when he was in Mesopotamia, before he dwelt in Haran," (Acts 7:2)
@@oliverbellh3633call no man Father, for you have one Father in Heaven.
My dad is my biological father and I call him father. My priest is my spiritual father and I call him father.
Even St. Paul calls himself a father (like a priest) in 1 Corinthians 4:15
Even if you had ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel.
@@IgnacioAgramontethis reminds me of my younger stepsister (we’re Hispanic btw so it’ll be considered “normal”) some things she’s said and done to me have been hard and she often threatens to tell mom on me for personal reasons, gonna make this long story short, she was controlling, invading my personal stuff, giving me silent treatment, etc, and one time she got into a love relationship with one of her cousins, and yet whenever I told her off, I’m essentially “talking back and disrespecting her”. And she’s told me not to tell mom otherwise “i’ll end up starting problems between me and her”. When me and my mom were together alone helping each other clean, she would ask me if my younger stepsister was doing what she did to me, I confidentially told her the truth. Mom then installed a ring surveillance doorbell for evidence in case my stepdad defended my younger stepsister (she was temporarily the favorite of the family). When she got finally told off for what she’s done, she would play victim, stay angry at me and my sister, and even cry to her mother living in Mexico telling her that “the family is traumatizing her and scaring her” even though we were not. I’m even scared to introduce her to my boyfriend in case she starts saying hurtful stuff about him, however as of 4/13/2024, she no longer lives with us after like what, 3 years and nearly 3 months? I tend to feel bad and call myself a chismosa but mom reassured me that what she’s done is never my fault and told me that I should not feel the need to cover anyone’s BS to feel liked or loved. I cried while being reassured but i digress.
Gossip drove my son from the church when he was a kid. He literally veiws the church as a pit of petty hostile people.
I wish more people were aware of the consequences of gossip.
We need a channel dedicated to gossip alone. Gossip destroys families, relationships, communities. It is so poisonous that it destroys a person's life. God bless you Fr. Mike
I am someone who has been gossiped about for 2 yrs at church. It gets so bad when I volunteer, I sometimes go home and cry. Thing is, I volunteer for God, not them. I try and make friends and help, but am pretty much an outcast because I do not gossip. Some of the cruelest people can be those who go to Mass, Take communion and then gossip about you. All I can do is pray that God gives me strength
Our LORD honors you from keeping yourself in the spirit of Christ ❤
This is year ago but hope things are better now. Made my husband and I emotional reading this. ❤
This was so deep... Everyday Betrayal = Gossip. I honestly didn't know the difference between venting and gossiping and I believe many people believe the two words are interchangeable. Thanks for this clarification and God bless your online ministry. May hearts and souls be touched by the Word of God.
When venting stops being "helping to carry a burden" to "recruiting to be on my side" Yes!
This came at just the right time! Thank you. As a recovering blabbermouth, I need to be more comfortable keeping silent about other people's matters, as well as practicing discretion on what I say.
A recovering blabbermouth...well said. Wisely said
thank you for differentiating "letting it out" vs "getting someone on your side." The former happened to me recently. When a friend and I had a disagreement, I had to vent it out to someone else not because I wanted them to take my side, but because I just didn't know what to do and needed help. And I was okay venting to that specific someone because I knew they wouldn't take either side, but acknowledge both sides & comfort me at the same time.
Sadly, I AM guilty of the latter, of trying to get someone on my side against a certain person... That wasn't cool of me, and tbh I still feel some pain from that every now and then. But I am grateful for a forgiving God who gives unlimited chances to try again. And I'm thankful for this video, and grateful to know the difference between venting and gossipping. Thank you, Father Mike
Thank you Fr Mike. Gossiping is a very disgusting habit, it destroys people & i can testify as i am a victim of church gossipers. I used to serve at church but one day i became the subject of malicious gossip of the same people who are also serving the church. However, i can face God because my conscience is clean but it has burned me alive at the stake, i turned my back at the church, stopped serving & stopped going to mass even, i thought what'sthe use anyway, for 25 years i was away from the church, i even tried going to mediums, started reading about new age religion but God never left me. To cut the story short & gladly, i returned back to the church this year, started attending the mass again, went back to confession again & started praying the holy rosary, chaplet of divine mercy & chaplet to st michael, etc again. If God wants me to serve again- it might take a lot of convincing, for now, im at peace to just pray, Our blessed mother never let go of me, i even dreamt of her one night telling me, it's time to go home, i didn'teven realize it was her until i received a picture of the immaculate concepcion from the Marian fathers. People need to understand especially those who are serving the church that gossip itself is a mortal sin, it kills not physically but spiritually not just the victim itelf but also the person who gossips & spreads lies, it is the work of the devil. I have decided that I will never leave Jesus & our blessed mother again for Judas & sadly, there are so many Judases in our church these days so i will stay praying in peace & quite, alone with God.
This is the best testimony. I feel that you are an innocent soul and a good example. Thank you for sharing this.
Thanks for sharing this. If I may ask, how're you doing now?
I'm new to your channel and I'm not actually catholic, but you really hit the head on the nail with this discussion about the difference between gossip and venting. I really appreciate this message
Women often carry the reputation for gossip, but even men should hear this difference between gossip and venting! Now I'll be going to reconciliation and apologizing to my roommate for gossiping...
Brian Heath Good point! The sin of gossip is not gender specific. This was an excellent talk.
In theory, that is what paid listeners are for. That is what they get paid to do.
@@aracelirivera2665 lool women gossip moore than maan 10000
I’ve heard plenty of men gossip Ive heard men talk about ppl in the worst ways while gossiping both Genders are guilty of this sin
Bored women and housewives gossip a lot.
Amen……”recruiting someone to be on my side”……perfectly said!
This video is still providing great guidance 7 years after it was recorded. I needed to hear it in 2023. As a manager, I routinely discuss employee performance, aptitude, and attitude with two colleagues. On occasion, during legit conversations, we slide into sinful gossip and slander. Ugh. I better tape that verse on my forehead so I don't forget. Or better yet, on my computer screen (for zoom calls).
As I listen to this, I can hear my coworkers gossiping about a former employee. I turned my headphones up.
This really resonated with me because this is the main reason why I separated myself from my in-laws. They are Catholic, and so in marriage, I converted. They judged me and mistreated me even before I married my husband, only knowing me for about 8 months. My husband and I met somewhat later in life and so we knew we were ready, so we moved quickly. He comes from a huge tight-knit family and they are very judgmental. About 15 years into the marriage, after my mother in law passed, I stopped attending family functions because I’m just done. The gossip and tension has taken a toll on me so I just stopped attending family events. I’m done.
I'm so sorry... Dealing with gossipers can be sooo extremely draining. I really feel you when you say "I'm done". I can't imagine how it feels to have to deal with gossiping from extended family that you have to see somewhat regularly.. for me it's a few people from church and it's exhausting, but I get to distance myself since we aren't related. So I can only imagine how much worse what you're describing is. Recently, I've started praying a lot against gossiping, for those that do it, and for me to not engage in it either by my silence or otherwise. I wish you all the best. God bless you!!🤗💗
Awesome words, Thank you Father. "Set a guard, LORD, before my mouth,
keep watch over the door of my lips". Thank for sharing this prayer.
📖Psalm 141:3 set o Lord a guard before my mouth,a gatekeeper at my lips! ✨
A sin is a sin
When we gossip we realize it by The Holy Spirit convicting us and then we as God for forgiveness
I am always praying that God help me to stop gossiping in Jesus Name 🙏🏾. Praying for all who read this or listen to this and is gossiping 🙏🏾
I've been struggling with gossip for a while and I always end up telling myself "well... I'm just venting". Of course this video would come up in my suggestions. Thank you!
I turned to the internet to look up help with gossip and came across this. It was exactly what I needed to hear.
This video is super helpful. I asked AI about this last week and I'm really happy to come across this video from Fr Mike. It helps to further make things clear.
For anyone who needs it, here's what I got as a response from AI as the difference between venting and gossiping:
"Gossiping is the act of casually talking about someone or something, often sharing unverified or personal information, rumors, or sensational details.
It's usually done in an informal setting, like conversations with friends, family, or coworkers.
Gossiping often involves:
1. Sharing personal or private information without consent
2. Spreading rumors or unverified stories
3. Talking about someone behind their back
4. Focusing on sensational or juicy details
Gossiping can be harmful, as it can:
1. Damage reputations
2. Spread misinformation
3. Create conflict or drama
4. Erode trust and relationships
Here's a distinction:
Gossiping:
- Sharing the story with the intention of exposing or humiliating the person
- Focusing on sensational or juicy details
- Sharing with people who don't need to know or aren't directly involved
Venting:
- Sharing your feelings and experience with someone you trust
- Processing your emotions and seeking support
- Focusing on your own perspective and reactions
To ensure you're venting and not gossiping:
1. Share with someone you trust, like a close friend or family member.
2. Focus on your feelings and reactions, rather than attacking the person.
3. Avoid sharing unnecessary details or spreading the story further.
Remember, venting can be therapeutic, but be mindful of your intentions and audience.It's essential to process your emotions and share your experience with trusted individuals without crossing the line into gossiping.
Remember, venting is about seeking support and guidance, not about spreading the story or harming the person's reputation.
When sharing with friends and family, focus on your feelings and reactions, using "I" statements, like:
- "I feel disrespected and shocked by his behavior."
- "I'm concerned about his wife and family."
- "I'm disappointed in his lack of integrity."
Avoid making statements that could be perceived as gossiping, like:
- "You won't believe what he did!"
- "He's such a terrible person!"
By sharing your experience thoughtfully, you can:
- Process your emotions
- Seek support and guidance
- Maintain a clear conscience
And yes, praying for the person and their family is a wonderful idea. It shows empathy and a willingness to see them grow and change."
Hope this helps!
"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." Ephesians 4:29 NLT
"Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips." - Psalm 141:3 (NIV)
"The one who guards their lips guards their soul, but the one who speaks rashly will come to ruin." - Proverbs 13:3 (NIV)
"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." - Colossians 4:6 (NIV)
Thank you Father Mike!! I really needed help in this area and have prayed for clarity. God bless you and your work through the Church and ministry. ✝️
My coworker and I vent a lot to each other about our manager because we both have to deal with him. It’s no secret about how he behaves - I mean no secret between us. Now I’m wondering if that’s really gossip if we just vent between ourselves. Ugh. Some days I feel like everything I do is a sin. Then I fall into the sin of scrupulosity. Maybe Fr. Mike should do a video on that sin.
Scrupulosity is generally not a sin because it's not something you can generally control (a sin requires you to be able to choose not to do something, and people usually don't choose to have extreme anxiety about their actions being sinful). You might want to look up what scrupulosity is; Catholic Answers has some good resources. Scrupulosity can be very difficult to avoid and may even require external help. Praying for you!
WOW... so what we need to hear. It's so hard to figure out when you have a major problem.
Sometimes it's not about helping someone but trying to find answers to what to do
Thank you for this Father Mike. I, too, struggle with this subject. I don't know the difference between gossiping or sharing information. I confess to gossiping every day because I get confused. I guess I gossip everytime I speak about someone else good or bad. I will definitely set a guard before my mouth and gatekeeper at my lips and think before I speak.
Thank you for this Fr. Mike! I found out the hard way what the difference is. I went and read on the life of St. Monica of Hippo and how she poured out her heart and shared her secrets only with God. I'm endeavoring to follow her example and already, I feel better about talking to Him alone whenever I have problems I can't share.
I am muslim, but it’s very interesting/ I was very curious how the Christians think about gossip. Thankyou for the information father ❤️
Jesus Christ loves you and everyone ❤❤
This is the video I needed in my feed today. There's been problems with a coworker, and the group discussion of these problems have made me uneasy as to whether it's gossip or not. Thank you Father Mike.
I ask in prayer for the Lord to fortify and cleanse my tongue everyday. This I believe to be a huge struggle for many of us. I have to practice thinking before I even open my mouth. Not my super power...
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation:
01:56 🗣️ Everyday betrayal can manifest as gossip, sharing private details and wounds of others without their consent.
02:52 🚫 Gossip should not be disguised as venting or processing; genuine venting seeks support and care, while gossip recruits others against someone.
05:10 ❤️ Choose words that build up and help others, being cautious with what you share and seeking discretion and charity in conversations.
06:05 🙏🏼 Daily prayer: "Set a guard, O Lord, before my mouth, a gatekeeper at my lips" (Psalm 141:3) to speak only what unites and truly helps others.
Made with HARPA AI
Thank and thank our one and true father in heaven. God bless you brother Mike🙏
This is the best explaination I've heard on gossiping. Thanks! You break it down perfectly!
Our words really do destroy relationships. I'm going to start taking a look at Psalms 141:3!
I can relate to that. I used to work at the Public Library. Been there for 9 years. I loved the job and the people I served, but I ended up quiting because of too much gossip on me by my co-workers.
I had to leave a job for this reason too.
I need to be more careful about the stuff that I share with people on Facebook.
YES, FOR SURE.
Be a gate keeper of my mouth, a ward of my lips, so awesome, really thats my new pray thanks a lot
Father. Mike your wisdom is astounding,Holy Spirit shines from you And you have such a sense of humour in comparison to many priests i hope thats not gossip...
This was so good and I really needed it. Forgive me God for this and change me Amen!!
Thank you Father Mike - this clears up that fine line of talking about someone to help them, or talking about them unfavourably to their harm. The later hurts them and ourselves rather than helping. Thank you for that insight. God Bless.
Great video done on an issue that goes mostly undetected. A lot of good saints get tangled up in the gossip web. Hurt people hurt people. We need healing and reconciliation. Thank you!! God bless you!!
Fr.mike like always what great message you give us...i do remember a prayer my mom always taught me in spansh "Cross of Jerusalem talk and respond for me calm the bad hearts that are against me" when I am involved in gossip I say the prayer in my mind and I kid you not but the person gets distracted or changes the subject!
Man he is so spot on. If u wouldnt say it in front of the person ur talking about, u should not say it behind their back.
Thank you Fr. Mike for explaining that, to which we can help or hurt others, with a slip of the tongue, and can damage us spiritually as well. 🙏🙏🙏
yes, we can express in a constructive manner so we can uplift others, our brethren. Peace be with you 🙏🏻
Thank you❤
“Set a guard, oh Lord, before my mouth, a gatekeeper at my lips.” Psalm 141 verse 3
I always feel this need to "vent" I don't though I keep it all to myself. I don't have anyone that I can talk to about my problems that I've had over the years and this last few months it has gotten so much harder. I was this close to just "vent" on social media but I had seen the thumbnail for this video a few months ago but I avoided it because I thought that I could just not vent or gossip but today I had to just look it up to give me strength to not give in and I am so glad that I did! I have been renewed with your words Father Mike! I will say this prayer all day every day. Thank you and God bless you Father Mike!
this is such an effective and helpful message sent from Jesus through you, thank you Father Mike 🙏 eye opening perspective on such a difficult topic to tackle
Full of wisdom, thanks Father Mike!
I have recently have been involved in a conflict with an organization and words truly can be toxic and I have to say I have trouble with what I should say to others because so much goes around. I don't want to talk bad about people, but I have heard so many lies about other individuals and even myself. It's just difficult trying to explain it in a way that doesn't put the other person down. Prayers are needed!
thank you for the verse in the Bible I really needed that I will pray daily thank you God bless
This is a major goal of mine. Working as a waitress provides a great challenge, and I'm not perfect at avoiding gossip, but I am getting ever better. Gossiping is cowardly and I'm not about that life. Finding more productive ways to vent and to respond to others' venting, well, it's a little way I hope to change the world. Encourage courage, not cowardice.
Fr Mike,
Please do a video on proper dress for women going to church!
I'm dressing modessly but would like to know your thoughts and guidelines on the subject.
Thank you, Sherry 60-year-old
Just covereted from no religion and made my Confirmation & 1st Holy Communion at the Easter Vigil !!!
Yay!
Ain't nobody got time for that!
Welcome home sherr case
The only time anyone is allowed to dress me is at my funeral, thank you very much.
@@okaminess hi, we didn't want to dress you 🤔 she were asking for advices only ;-) blessings !
Awe, man, absolutely! I like the analogy - everyday betrayal. "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me" - the gossip that changed a generation ;) Our words are the foundation of who we are and how we share our hearts! Thank you, Fr Mike!
I love that "Our words are the foundation.....etc" It's simply stated and yet profound. Thank you. I am now writing it on a card and adding it to my wall, so i see it everyday. As a reminder to live more consciously.
So venting is a reaching out and gossiping is recruiting to be on your side against that person....life changing!! sometimes in communion ill say put a stone on my tongue so i speak little, i think i read this in saint faustinas diary and i started saying it bcuz i got convicted reading james but james is right we all dragged Jesus to the cross so who am i to judge and be unmerciful that scripture gets me everytime like a knife thank you father i appreciate this in all u do as a preist
Yes, remember that "gossib" has been thw one thing that has helped women to be safe around men for ages. You should always think if the info is actually helpfull and important as the creatoe of this video said!
I think we all struggle with this. Sometimes if I felt I had a raw deal with someone I might vent to a close colleague and often it helps me feel better when the colleague tells me of others' similar experiences with this person. Having listened to Father, I need to think twice about this. This channel is so useful! Thank you Father!
This needs to be spoken about more.
Wow I needed to hear this one... I am horrible about "just venting" and not doing it in a way that allow others to give me advice.
Fr. Mike, do you have a podcast? I could listen to you all day! Thank you for pointing out things I wouldn't really consider "wrong." And thank you for referencing the Bible or alluding to biblical times; it really helps me when I do my bible journaling.
Bulldogcatholic is a great resource and keep your eye out for podcasting features coming soon on AscensionPresents.com
soundcloud...bulldog Catholic
Definitely check out his bible on a year podcast!
It really does make a differance when you break it down into the ways the conversation can go
Posing question: What is the best course of action when people are gossiping to you?
+Kevin Mccullouch That's what I was thinking and it does help a bit. It seems to me the difficult part is having the courage to confront the person gossiping to you, and there is a time and place for that as with everything. I've been put in that situation before and thought others shedding a light on it would help out as well!
Peace and Blessings!
+Zachary Wierschem your are exactly right about the need for courage in the situation. Pray to the Holy Spirit for the courage Zachary. It will be given to you. God Bless.
Since this has happened to me pretty badly at my previous workplace-here is what I focused on. If people are gossiping about you, that means they have nothing better to focus on. They're boring. If you're the of focus of their lives, that says a lot about the state of their own lives.
Thanks for your question, Zachary! We've added it to our list of #askfrmike requests! Please know of our prayers and pray for all of us at Ascension Press if you think of it!
how about posing it as a question in order to get them thinking, perhaps thereby opening the door to some deeper yet friendlier discussions? for example, how about asking one of these (while looking and sounding genuinely curious about their perspectives)?
"how does that saying go? is it 'those who gossip to you will also gossip about you'?"
"how long is it okay to talk about someone behind their back before it becomes gossip, exactly?"
downloaded all your videos, converted to one giant mp3... after i have an hour of silence when i wake up i play my massive Fr Mike mp3 with lord of the rings music playing quietly in the background. #quirkyconfessions. great video Fr Mike!
Mezmerizer hahahaha that's Great
❤thank you, God bless you 🙏 Amen
Wow !!!! You are really helping me see the things in my life I need to change about myself !!! Thank You !!!
Thank you. Needed to hear this. Thank you Father.
Who doesn't need to hear this information? Great job Fr. Mike. 141 3 (and part of 4) is now on a post-it-note attached to my work monitor. It is weird how this is in my feed when I need it most.
Thank you for sharing such a timely message today for me from God. ❤
This was a GREAT teaching on this subject. God bless you!
Thank you so much for covering this topic! I 've been wondering about the difference between venting and gossiping for weeks, after reading something from Mother Angelica about gossip. She said something along the lines of "If it doesn't help the other person, don't say it." But that doesn't leave much room if another person is driving you crazy and you want to complain! So thank you for expanding on it, and thank you for finding a prayer for it. I know i'll be using it!
In that case Jesus said Pray for your enemies. Otherwise maybe don't use the name if seeing answers
When I'm in a conversation and it's usually when someone is having a problem with someone else and I feel we are talking about the behaviors and we are trying to process and analyze the situation.
I some point I will say "Lord I am not gossiping about this person I am concerned about the behaviors that is causing this person pain and suffering".
its Fr mike saying ain't nobody got time for that for me😂😂😂😂... thank you Fr... you are always such a delight and I learn a whole lot from your messages..
I've always been told gossiping is wrong but I often have a hard time realizing the line between gossip and talking about somebody else. For instance, if I heard that so-and-so was pregnant out of wedlock, spreading this information would definitely be gossip. But what if I am speaking to one of my friends about a mutual friend who has behaved in a negative light, for instance, changing their character due to an unhealthy relationship, is this gossip?
I want to refrain from gossiping but I just have a lot of trouble knowing where the boundaries lie.
Yes, simply put, if it isn’t your story to tell, it’s gossip!
As Father Mike says...ask yourself three questions.
1. Is it true?
2. Is it good?
3. Is it useful.
At that point, you should have your answer :)
@@bluej6800 I don’t understand this. Sometimes I need opinions on how to respond so i’ll ask my sister on advice on a situation. How is that gossiping?
@@lauraaah.4343 you already know the answer to your question, just turn it around as if you were on the receiving end of being discussed, how would that feel to you. That’s all I can say because I don’t know you or the details of what you’re referring too.
@@lauraaah.4343 maybe you don’t need advice, could it be that, that’s your way to gossip.
Thank you!
My sibling just got out of an abusive relationship and they vent to me often...but it is difficult to tell where the line is between venting about all the little everyday experiences of oppression/abuse and bashing their ex. I will try to pray that prayer/verse and for a way to share it with my sibling. Thanks for touching on the issue.
That’s not venting, that’s gossiping, and it keeps them stuck, because all they do is gossip about the other person instead of solving their problem once and for all.
The concern of needing to run for your life (as many have to do) is real. I reached the conclusión that just professionals understand the danger of a toxic relationship.
@@bluej6800 telling someone else that you’re being abused is NOT gossiping.
@@gfitz6001 of course, it isn’t! But if that’s all you ever do about it, then what do you call it?
@@gfitz6001 If all you continue to do is talk about the abuse and yet you stay in it, month after month, and just vent without ever doing anything about it, then (I think)
it becomes gossiping. That’s what I was referring too. No one should be abused in any form.
Did you read the paragraph that I was referring too when I made my comment?
I agree it’s sometimes hard to tell the difference between venting and gossiping, and I just gave my opinion, I’m certainly no expert. Best of luck to you.
Thank you for explaining this lesson.
Fantastic Amen 🙏❤️👍 thanks Fr Mike well said 🙏🙏👍
This is the story of my life.m, Father. The older aunties who gossip is the reason why all youths stopped attending the prayer meetings & the reason why I left the church for 5 yrs.
Edit : My Mum's lack of boundaries does n't help one bit either.
Thanks Father.🙏
Careful who you open up to
Full disclosure, I stumbled on this channel “randomly” and am a witch. But the messages on the channel are so beautiful so I’ve been tuning in.
Lovely! Please ask God how to leave it behind. Jesus loves you. We can't serve God's
To all interested “truth with handles “ has an episode on gossip 20min or so- Catholic women. It’s a must to listen to
Thank you Father Mike
I needed this clarification
Enjoyed this message! side note: Fr. Mike = 70% Jon Hamm + 15% Jason Sudeikis + 15% John Krasinski
Lol yes
I had a bad car accident and a friend from high school told people I was addicted to drugs. I was so hurt by that and have had trouble getting over it because she told so many people right before my class reunion. I found out the hard way she wasn't a true friend.
Please forgive your friend, as we ask God for forgiveness.
IT WAS ALSO A BLESSING IN DISGUISE...YOU GOT TO SEE HER TRUE INTENTIONS AND FEELINGS FOR U!!..HAD SHE NOT DID THAT U WOULD HAVE BEEN FRIENDS WITH A FAKE PERSON FOR POSSIBLY YEARS ON
Thank you so much for this, it helps me to understand why it feels so crappy when others spread your info. I like to be open and share my business but lately i am seeing that it is being used to judge me.
thank you father mike. psalm 141 that is for me. have to write that one down for sure
excellent, thank you for clarifying this. i have often wondered where the distinction lies!
I have been doing this and I feel terrible and do t want to keep doing. Thank you for the video.
Oh Fr.Mike I must say evrything that u mentioned are all nice-- honestly yer talk, this spiritual talk actually is like having a LONGSILOG (Longganisa, Sinangag at Itlog) for breakfast learned a lot. Thank U n God bless u!😃👌❤❤❤❤❤
God needed me to hear this, thank you Father. this is fantastic
I try my best not to get involved in gossip because it can be very hurtful and damaging. At times I find myself getting involved in it (actually doing the gossiping or listening to it) and I always feel horrible afterwards.
@Marci HF true sometimes One is caught up in the middle! But am trying to be more cautious & i Can now differentiate friends who incite more gossips than others! So i try to mention often about gossip that am confessing often about gossip etc or atleast change the topic or only talk positive stuffs, try to talk on behalf of the non-present party.. its helping abit but hard.. otherwise avoid such people & pray for Them. Some you talk with & your spirit feel messed with!
When you said “mostly at church” -- you have that right 🤦🏼♀️ It actually happened “in” confession ….. and my reply was “holy ___” about four times - obviously, we both were wrong!
I really need to work on this
same
Same
I think a lot of us do, including me.
"Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly." -2 Timothy 2:16
These are subjects not super fresh on my mind because I’ve been isolated for so long. I know that gossip in any meeting of people is working in reverse to an effective organization. When are around people, we need to only engage in positive, uplifting conversations. That brings one and all up to a higher level.
As much as I appreciate Fr. Mike’s other videos, I actually think this one is more confusing than helpful. It still seems to me that venting is just a more socially acceptable word for gossiping. Personally, I find Dave Ramsey’s definition of gossip more helpful than attempting to make a distinction between venting and gossiping, which are really the same thing. Dave defines gossip as “When a negative is discussed with anyone who can’t solve the problem.” I can understand that sometimes there is a need to talk about another person in order to solve a problem, but I wouldn’t call that venting. Instead I would call it problem solving, or perhaps seeking advice. Just my two cents, from a fellow sinner who struggles with gossip and knowing where to draw the line.
That's very interesting! I never looked at it that way. I do think that at times we need to talk to someone trusted (like mother or sister) just to get a load off our chest even though they can't solve the problem. Like sharing our feelings if someone mistreated us. Of course you should confront the person about their mistreatment too. Even venting can be excessive if we do it in front of everyone we know. Gossip is more like "airing someone's dirty laundry" that we have no business doing...ever.
@@magnolia8626 exactly! I do believe not every talk about other people has to be about solving problem. We should be able to express our frustration and seeking consolation in our trusted friends and family. Sometime, talking about other people problem in the spirit of concern for them can be good too. Gossiping is really when you talk about other's people business in a spirit of demeaning, creating opportunities for other people to attack the person.
Venting is okay. Everyone has a right to do the same thing in whatever manner they choose also.
@@huyenvu851 I agree. It doesn't solve the problem.
I don't believe in gossip.
Thanks 🙏🏽 Fr. Mike
Psalm 141:3 thank you ✝️