1. listening to others, curiosity 2. Always consider the matter carefully 3. Independent, Know yourself, this also makes it easier for you to understand the other person 4. know how to use body language
As an introvert, I did not get to go on my first date until I was 26; struck out every time before that. I'm a quiet homebody, in bed by 7:30pm even on the weekends and love my quiet time. I asked out a girl who I thought was "completely out of my league pretty" (I call her my modern-day Marilyn Monroe) because I just decided to take the risk one day one more time. No cheesy pick up lines and no cheesy macho approach. I probably came off as a 1950s nerd asking her out politely and simply. Amazingly she said Yes. By shear luck, we had similar personalities and likes/dislikes and similar ambitions for later in life. Three years of dating later we were married and 19 years later we are still married. How did I use my introverted personality? I really have no idea. I often wonder how I got so lucky. I once asked her why she said yes to a date when I'd heard there were other guys at work wanting to court her. She simply said nobody else ever asked her out; which amazed me, I guess it's true that girls who are too pretty sometimes never get asked. And, that I asked her nicely...she emphasized the "I asked her nicely" part. The rest I think was luck that we were well matched. I never put on a show that I was something more or did anything to try to impress her. I just talked to her, respected her (just be polite and friendly to not only her but everyone...she can tell if you are sincere or not) and took her out to do things I liked to do and that I normally did (again, no flashy dates that were outside of my daily routine/life of things I normally did)....and....I didn't focus on or hit on her prettiness or on sex (months of dating before getting around to the intimate part, hey, the getting to know each other by talking was working well). And well, she liked that. Money was not an issue. Back then she was making $27,000/yr and I was making $18,000/yr, so she didn't date me for my money....we worked at the same employer. But she knew that I had ambition and drive to do better in the future and so she stayed with me and I eventually did substantially better. An interesting note, I proposed to her after 2 years of dating. And when I proposed, she said Yes and said that it was about time as she was ready to say Yes six months earlier and was getting close to giving up on me. I never saw the signs that she was ready earlier. Of course you are probably wondering if I'm still married why am I watching this? Because I like to learn about different things on self-improvement and TH-cam makes that easy; I don't need or adopt all the advise, but it's interesting none the less. My advice as an introvert who isn't good at conversation to start (I'm not a quick thinker on my feet and need time to absorb and analyze details before going further), think of basic probing questions to ask on the first date. Then go home, and write some notes down. On later dates, think about what she said and look at your notes on the previous dates and then pre-write/remember deeper follow up questions. For example, if on the first date you find out she likes to snowboard, after asking about how long and where she likes to go, you start asking much deeper questions about why she likes it, what's that deep drive inside of her that makes that fun and interesting and you ask the right, sincere, meaningful questions you get her thinking introspectively about herself. My wife found that attractive as by the second date other guys she had dated were more focused on her boobs at that point.
Well said, great advice, and proof that these things do work out if you stay true to yourself and not try to be someone you’re not in hopes of landing “the one”….thanks for sharing.
As an Introvert it is difficult, I've been told my "tiredness" after a day out is just an excuse to leave/escape and go home, to which some think that means I don't care or I'm not interested. I guess the key is to find someone who understands how introverts work cause they can be massively misunderstood.
I think the key thing irrespective of personality type is, To find someone that actually wants to know the other person. And to know them so deeply (be "in tune" with them) that they can start to feel what the other person is feeling..... when they start to feel it. When both parties do this it is really beautiful, Imagine an extravert and introvert (who are dating) go to a party, It starts to get "a bit late" and the introvert is "done", the extrovert senses this and actually suggest to the introvert that they should look to head off soon. And the reverse is also true, that the introvert though "done" can sense that the extrovert is having a good time and so puts off suggesting to leave.
You either need to be wealthy, be in the top 5% of male looks, or have a really stand out attractive personality to get anywhere with women these days.. I hope you have 1 of the other 2 qualifications...
When I found out what an introvert was I remember thinking” 🤔 oh that’s why I find myself yawning at 7pm at dinners with huge groups of friends or just wanting to get back to reading my book when I was at parties lol”
Oh man! That just happened to me over the weekend. I can take large groups but for only a short period of time. I'm INFJ personality so it can be super strange for me.
Good points. I was pretty introverted in high school and part of college. Being an introvert as a guy is a major issue with dating. However, I did push myself to become more social and now I'm more of an ambivert. In the end, you can use some of your listening skills to enhance your dating experiences, but you still need to do more than usual compared to someone who is a natural extrovert
I definitely felt that reading the room moment the other night. I joined some coworkers to a Karaoke Bar. I really like singing, but I've never sung at Karaoke. Never liked the bar scene. Also most of the songs I know are show tunes, joke songs, or old songs ranging from drunken sailor, battle hymn of the republic, or 1950s big band songs. Most of the songs being sung were more modern and I thought it would be weird if I sang something really old. Well I noticed non of my coworkers were brave enough to go do Karaoke themselves and I figured since I like singing I should go up there and do it, but what really inspired me was seeing all the couples in the bar. Particularly one couple a table over who seemed really into each other. I had one song that would really fit with what I was seeing. So I overcame any anxiety I asked the DJ to play the song when I came up. When it finally was my turn I started singing "That's Amore" by Dean Martin and the bar just lit up. People cheered some got up and started dancing. When I was finished I got a lot of compliments, the DJ had a big smile and looked really impressed and the lady from that couple a table over complimented and gave me a thumbs up. Have to admit it was a real ego boost for me that night. Looking back I think a mix of being a really unexpected, but well known and a very fun song along with the fact I knew how to sing the song well is why it was such a hit with the crowd. I don't think I would have picked that song if it wasn't for being able to look around and read the room.
From one introvert to another, preciate you Court! Focusing on my career and other priorities as I’m 24 and 3 months out of college, is important to me long before I think about putting a woman in my life.
Happy Friday, Courtney! I would consider myself both an extrovert and introvert as I'm outgoing with people but I definitely embrace my privacy. When I don't know someone well, I'm definitely going to be more introverted but as I get to know them, I will feel more comfortable to see if they're worth trusting or keep at distance. My girlfriend and I are totally different from each other but it evens out as it's a good balance between her and I
Thank you for doing a video on this subject. As an introvert myself, and single, I haven't been out on the dating scene lately. Yet, I remain in that constant state of self-improvement, and I do hope that I meet a high-quality lady someday that is also in a self-improvement mode as well. Because after all, if you want high quality, you have to be high quality.
I needed this video. I'm an introvert & found myself constantly overthinking situations & and getting out of my character(clingy). Taking a break from dating & social media, so I can learn more about myself and become a better man. Thanks Courtney 😊😊
Best thing to do as an introvert: walk away, read a book, take martial arts, & focus on science. With the current dating scene she’ll likely be as single next month, if she’s not you dodged a bullet.
@@brentleask3877 Well first thing's first: don't be worried about any of it (as much as is possible right now). Strange as it may seem, but social anxiousness and introversion can both be attractive to women as long as you're genuine in your interactions. I'd say you should work on your social anxiety however you can but it may even go away to an extent or even fully simply through socialization. As far as introversion is concerned, I don't think that's a problem at all unless it's to an extent where you hate social activities or talking to people, in which case you've strayed into antisocial territory.
Being an introvert is a lot harder as a guy I think. Many women look to men to lead the energy and generate the spark on the date (and pull them into a positive vibe), and if you don't have the energy it can be an awkward uncomfortable date for both parties.
Awesomeness! Thanks for posting this! As an introvert, I can't handle too many people at once. So when I was with those 3 girls for 4th of July, I definitely was in my zone, relaxed, having fun, no pressure or anxiety
Thank you! I actually had a girl drop by going door to door for voter registration. She told me I had pretty eyes and naturally, I was being playful and we were talking about our dogs
First off I've been watching a lot of your videos on TH-cam and your mindset is so mature and easy going! I am currently going through a divorce and watching your videos has opened my eyes to a lot that was going on in the relationship not only on her side but on my own as well. I'm certainly going to be looking for so many of the things you explained in my next relationship whenever that time comes and your relaxed way of expressing it all made it all really easy to understand and sort of engrave into my head. Thank you for your dedication to spreading the word!
This video described majority of my dating life to a tee as I'm someone who is very patient and doesn't rush into anything when it comes to relationships. I'm very selective about what I want, and whenever I'm on dates with women I give just enough to keep them intrigued yet keep the cards close to my chest and allow the woman to find out things about me over time.
I'm 46 and I'm more ambiverted these days but naturally I'm a introvert.. I still don't like big crowds and a big homebody. I'm perceived as "boring" by most women. I'm silly, goofy, friendly and mild manneted but I'm also direct, assertive. and no nonsense. I think my personality throws people off. I get them comfortable being them and they show their true colors, cause they think I'm weak...when I give that same energy back I'm labeled as "mean". I've dated here and there for 21 years... my problem isnt meeting women, it just never lasts very long after meeting them. Been single that long too. I'm 46. I'm at a point now where I'm happy being on my own.. I've learned to love it...now I don't care about meeting anyone lol.
@@Lordran__ thanks for taking the time out to read it. I know it's kinda long...just thought it might be people similar to me and too let them know it's OK to be single, don't have to follow society's standards of happiness.
Ill be in the same boat when I’m your age brother. Some guys just have it. Others dont. I’m one of the ones that dont, and I’m perfectly fine with that
As an introvert my biggest challenge is securing a date, my biggest strength is the actual date. In a way this is the better problem to have. I taught myself to be more assertive and this paired with my sympathy I find is a really attractive combination to women. (Eg. I'll plan the whole date, and take care of everything including parking. Meanwhile giving her options and asking for her input) I'm also naturally very curious about how things work, including understanding who people truely are. This takes form in me asking engaging and unique questions, making the conversations exciting and flow easy. What I'm really doing is updating the model I have of the other person lol I'm quite observant and analytical so I'm able to quickly understand people. I notice small details and information they tell me to draw inferences that are often correct. This usually results in them feeling comfortable, feelings of chemistry and familiarity. Basically if you're a nerd like me you can apply your critical thinking into exploring who your date really is and this naturally results in it going very well.
Same here -- so far I like pretty much everything I have in her model, my one and only big question so far is how tolerant she will be of our religious differences!
A positive video about introverts, but being painfully shy, having social anxiety all my life is not a positive thing, as commented previously I've tried NLP, CBT, group therapy, one to one talking therapy, reading self help books, breathing techniques and all have worked a bit but I've just got to live with the condition, I have had quite a few girlfriends but have been single for more than twenty years now, women get bored very easily and give up if you're not the outgoing type with fascinating conversation.
I’m 36, male, introvert but I’m not shy. I can be very social. I can talk to an entire room full of people especially women. My beef with being introverted is that my “social/emotional battery” gets drained. This requires me to more-or-less pull out of the public eye and “recharge” it’s mandatory. If I don’t respect this self-maintenance requirement, my mental health suffers and many times I have neglected this need to recharge for self care and have ended up with depression/anxiety. It took me many years to understand and realize that I was introverted and being introverted required unique self-care and maintenance. And yes, this has and will negatively impact my relationship with women because humans are social creatures and they need to socialize and connect emotionally. It’s hard to do this with introverts who can become burnt out from over-socializing even with a significant other. It’s unfair to have to deal with this.
I really appreciate your insight on being an introvert and how to utilize your strengths as an introvert. As one I will say it can be very challenging in many scenarios and especially dating. And like you said, it's sometimes more exhausting to do the "small talk thing" than it is to have a more deep/heartfelt conversation. It's good to know I'm not the only one that thinks this way. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol. Thank you for what you are doing with your channel Courtney! You really are making a difference. Keep up the good work! God bless you.
Really liked this one. Being an introvert allows me to create stronger bonds and to be very selective when it comes to create connections and relations with others. I wasn't considering being an introvert a good thing but I have learned the advantages and the strongest points of this trait. Thank you Courtney for covering this topic, it was brilliant!
I’m actually not introverted but I do watch these videos to help relate to my girlfriend who is. It’s definitely a good learning opportunity and I think it helps me be closer to her.
This actually made me feel a lot better about certain qualities of mine, it was a real confidence boost. You're so awesome Courtney, thank you so much for what you're doing. It has really helped me a lot just in the last few short weeks that I've started watching your content.
I am an introvert. But i think i am also shy. I don’t think my introversion gets in the way. Once i get comfortable around someone, I’ll talk.. and I’m really smart. I have spent a lot of time learning psychology and sociology. Ill make the conversation engaging and reflective. I think my shyness is my problem. I was bullied a lot in school growing up. I was a fat kid with autism. I was socially awkward and got picked on by family, friends, and girls.. I learned to be quiet and shy by getting rejected/made fun of over and over again. the fear of rejection can hurt so much more than the rejection itself. I’m self aware if my issues. I gotta talk more. People flirt with me all the time, and I quickly look away because i get anxious. It’s not a lack of confidence. It’s more like a self esteem issue. And words of affirmations to trick your brain is such foolish thinking. You’re picking up an ideal to fool yourself that you are a worthy human being. It’s just wishful thinking. I just need to expose myself. Let people see me.
Great tips! And speaking of “Introverts…” Sigma Males are also Introverts - and they tend to do great with women! It seems like a Sigma Male is the guy to be - they get the best of both worlds. They’re not Beta Males, and they’re not necessarily Alpha Males either. They’re sort of in the middle. They’re kind of Introverts, because they don’t want to be distracted by other people’s thoughts and views all the time. They know what they want out of life, and they’re focused - and they wake up each morning ready, and they put their whole mind to it! Anyway, that’s my two cents. -Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
I don’t see many advantages to being introverted as a guy when it comes to dating. But I have used it to my advantage in my career/business. In meetings, I’m good at listening and not feeling the need to always be the loudest in the room constantly talking. When I do speak, I make sure I’m saying something of value, which ironically has people leaving the meeting thinking I spoke more than I did since everything I said was relevant and added value
Don't be too introverted 😬I am very much so, and before i knew it , BOOM! It feels like life has passed me by. And that feeling has made me even more introverted.
Confidence stems from quitting about giving a fuck. Improve your life but stop being preoccupied with what people expect you to be...Let me leave you with something. Know the fraise "when you fall off a horse get back on it again?". Next time get on, grab and twist that horses ears forcefully. Haymaker the thing if you have to. Then say "were gonna do this shit right this time mf or so help me". Be deliberate, despite results or approval.
I am an introvert and very socially awkward. I am fine on stage in front of a crowd, or in front of a camera. The guy on stage is just a musician and hiding behind an instrument. He's not really me. Making my TH-cam videos, it is just me talking out loud and a camera just happens to be catching it on video. However, when I have to talk individually to people, especially trying to do a date, that's when I fall apart. I do not get many first dates, and I almost never get a second date.
As a shy, introverted guy with social anxiety and battling depression, I thought I was doomed to be alone forever because I could not approach women and talk to them. But after over 10 years of searching, I finally found a woman who could overlook those problems I had. Thank God for internet dating sites where my social anxiety and shyness did not holding me back from contacting women online and talking to them. Real life first meeting was the hard part, but after over a month of talking, I was prepared and it went well. Glad I did not give up.
Quiet people always know more than they seem. Although very normal, their inner world is by default fronted mysterious and therefore assumed weird. Never underestimate the social awareness and sense of reality in a quiet person; they are some of the most observant, absorbent persons of all.
Thank you Courtney! Being an outgoing introvert helps me be more authentic. Standing next to the woman I would like to meet, I often got tongue-tied. I'm ok with that now and just make small talk just to make a start......and take it from there.
I am an introvert and this video really shows that she knows what she is talking about, im not exactly shy and im definetly at my strongest when in a 1 on 1 conversation, but my problem is getting there, how to get a date? Dating apps are not working, bars are not really my thing and i dont feel comfortable forcing myself to start a new hobby i dont like just to meet women.
I want to talk to you about a situation with an ex involving human trafficking, drug dealing, prostitution, and how I knew about NONE of it while I was “dating” her for a year and a half. Please, this is very important and I would love some guidance.
Stumbled across a few of your videos, Big ups to you. Especially for this one, I'd say I'm an introvert. You are definitely doing a service for all of us out here big UPS to you again May life continue to bless you
As a introvert I thought I was doing ok talking to a girl. Talked to her for months. She was showing interest. Wanted to learn more about me. Finally made my move with roses and a teddy bear. Then find out she isn't single. Might be the end for this sigma. 😕
talking to a girl for months before you made your move? Dude! That's just a waste of time. It's also inherently unattractive to any girl and it communicates lack of confidence and indecision. You should be asking a girl out within the first few exchanges - test her attraction early on. If it's not there, move on yo the next girl. And flowers and a Teddy Bear? That's for GFs in their birthday, not some chick you're asking out for the first time.
@@jleano609 sorry I'm not a Playa like you. Lol. I don't let people get that close to me quickly. It pissed you off more then it did me that's what I find funny.
@@Outlaw4640 I’m no player in fact I’m pretty introverted too. The simple fact is this though. Being confident and decisive are majorly attractive for women. The more time you spend with a woman where you don’t escalate and instead tell her more and more information about yourself, the more she sees you as a friend instead of a potential lover. This is because there is no excitement or emotional tension and having that “spiking” is what gets her into you. Also it’s kind of “sneaky f@cker” game to play “we’re just friends” with a girl first and then switch to “surprise! I fancy you!” That’s what Nice Guys do, because they lack the confidence to be authentic. And women thus hate Nice Guy Sneaky F@ckers. So Sigma, when you meet a girl you like, move fairly quickly. If it’s texting you’ve got 24hrs max to ask for a coffee date. If face to face it really should be at the end of your FIRST conversation. It’s honest and direct. Plus you’re not wasting time because you’re testing her attraction early on. If she says NO then you can just NEXT her and talk to someone else.
People said I am introvert because I don’t speak in public or in a big group. However, I can talk to strangers or my dates for an hour easily and not sure if I am not still introvert.
I think you are wrong about knowing what you want because of being alone. I've found that being alone has not brought me the clarity of knowing what I want because of lack of experience figuring it out. But that's just me.
Forgot to mention that he shall be tall and physically attractive. If yes, then it doesn't matter if he is an extrovert or introvert, women will come up with any reason why it is good. If he is not attractive, the same qualities will be perceived as bad.
I'm going to keep repeating myself to every guy that brings this up. Not every woman cares if your tall! I'm 5.2 I prefer guys closer to my height. I am attracted to guys that also wear glasses. And I would date someone shorter or even in a wheelchair. Because what matters is who you are as a person. Same with money I don't care how much you have! Just have a stable job and pay your bills on time to show you handle your money wisely. Every one is a 10 to someone. 🖖🌺
this will sound strange.. but this is what it means when people tell u dont be creepy, dont be weird.. it means ur not calibrating to the moment, ur just not there, not present, but u cant calibrate to the moment couse ur stuck in ur head and ur denying all the anxiety and fear ur feeling .. when u feel something - anxiety, fear, insecurities etc.. dont deny it, dont hide it.. accept it, enjoy it, have fun.. from there u can calibrate to the moment and ull be more aware in general.. trust me it does wonders to ur life in every area.. i hope atleast one guy is able to realise his potential from reading this comment
I'm different from most other introverts then apparently as I have NO ISSUES with confrontation. Confrontation and conflict are not synonymous, but they are often easily confused. I don't care one bit what anyone thinks, if someone says something that is WAY off base from the truth, I will tell them that as well as why that is. I try not to do so in an inherently disrespectful or "rude" way or with too much animation/emotion, but if their level of authority renders them contextually irresponsible, that certainly could be a part of the examination as well. If someone is acting in a way or in belief of something which is *objectively dishonorable/disrespectful,* I don't care very much about their emotion or my own when I tell them what they've done. Emotion as a whole is practically an invalid factor regardless, yet so many people still think it is the end-all be-all of what makes a person. Too many want to *_self-identity_* themselves as "empaths" these days, and the irony of that reality is quite hilarious to me. If someone values emotion over truth, then their emotions are TRULY baseless. Truth is NOT controlled by emotion, it's vice versa.
Courtney says she is an introvert. I've watched several of her videos. She'll periodically say that when she was younger, she'd go out with her friends to bars, or she dated several men who eventually made her a better person, or used to go to parties and was in conversations with couples there. That's not being an introvert! An introvert is me: I don't go out, I don't hang out with people, and I like living alone and not talk to my neighbors. Now that's being an introvert.
Hi Courtney, new to your channel, like what I’m hearing. Anyway, you referred to guys that are ‘needy’ or use ‘you complete me’ speak as very unattractive, and I would agree. On another woman’s ‘men’s advice’ channel, she also described needy and ‘you complete me’ traits as “very off putting” and that basically if a guy has his stuff together and can show that he doesn’t ‘need’ a woman, that is when he will become more attractive to women, and women will naturally want to “stand by” that kind of man, in a nutshell. Well, a lot of the commenters slammed her for telling a fairy tale and “she’ll leave you anyway when she gets bored”. Just an observation but it was really interesting to see to how completely opposite the two sides were. Some of the guys had a couple interesting points that I wish she would respond to. I also wonder if her points were taken a little too literally maybe. Anyway, like your channel, and keep up the good work!
Introverts of the world: UNITE! Separately. Dyslexic Introverts of the world: UNTIE! 😊😊😊 {FWIW: While I am not dyslexic, I am DEFINITELY an introvert. AND have ADHD, which unfortunately WAS NOT DIAGNOSED until I was around 38 years old...🙄}
Personality types go across the board. Some grow up shy and introspective, and later become more extroverted as they get more friends and become more social. Hard to say how much the 2 traits could overlap in some people. Extroverts can have a shy introverted side too. I know there are pure versions of both, but I feel like I have some of both traits. I'm introspective, but not a true introvert or extrovert.
It is so ironic how many introvert traits i seem to have, thankfully fear is not among that group in any form. Perhaps i should focus on introverts when, and if, i ever solve two issues i have at dealing with people.
While I've always known this and practiced it (so this video only affirms things for me, and doesn't necessarily help me), I'm sure there are many that have been told "if you're introverted, you're doomed." This video certainly dispels that notion. I would say, however, that being an introvert does not always guarantee someone self-reflects--so I appreciate you including that point for those who have not done so, or not looked at their lives analytically. Of course the caveat is this is helpful IF a guy manages to find a female that will appreciate it. I've attracted many females because of my listening skills (and could have blackmailed a few had I wanted because yes they did tell me way too much personal information), but it begs the question "will the female truly appreciate it and value the guy with that trait?" Too many want the attention and support, but don't commit themselves to making it a relationship these days.
I'm definitely an introvert to say the least. Taking my time and listening to everything said etc., so I'm not wasting my time. It keeps me respectful and humble towards a woman. I find that I can then proceed to be more confident which opens up doors for humor. I really enjoy laughing together even at my own expense. Btw Courtney! I love your thumbnail picture in this video. Looks different yet very nice. Have a great day and weekend!
"A wise man speaks because he has something to say. A fool speaks because he has to say something." - Plato
Love this!
good speech is silver, silence is golden.
@@drpg4ever823 Duct tape is also silver. 😉😄
Deep.
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak up and remove all doubt." -Abraham Lincoln.
1. listening to others, curiosity
2. Always consider the matter carefully
3. Independent, Know yourself, this also makes it easier for you to understand the other person
4. know how to use body language
I been using this to get to know an introverted female barista I am genuinely interested and curious about
read the unplugged alpha by rich. cooper
@@RR-et6zp Did you... just recommend a web novel? The title.sounds generic for them.
As an introvert, I did not get to go on my first date until I was 26; struck out every time before that. I'm a quiet homebody, in bed by 7:30pm even on the weekends and love my quiet time. I asked out a girl who I thought was "completely out of my league pretty" (I call her my modern-day Marilyn Monroe) because I just decided to take the risk one day one more time. No cheesy pick up lines and no cheesy macho approach. I probably came off as a 1950s nerd asking her out politely and simply. Amazingly she said Yes. By shear luck, we had similar personalities and likes/dislikes and similar ambitions for later in life. Three years of dating later we were married and 19 years later we are still married. How did I use my introverted personality? I really have no idea. I often wonder how I got so lucky. I once asked her why she said yes to a date when I'd heard there were other guys at work wanting to court her. She simply said nobody else ever asked her out; which amazed me, I guess it's true that girls who are too pretty sometimes never get asked. And, that I asked her nicely...she emphasized the "I asked her nicely" part. The rest I think was luck that we were well matched. I never put on a show that I was something more or did anything to try to impress her. I just talked to her, respected her (just be polite and friendly to not only her but everyone...she can tell if you are sincere or not) and took her out to do things I liked to do and that I normally did (again, no flashy dates that were outside of my daily routine/life of things I normally did)....and....I didn't focus on or hit on her prettiness or on sex (months of dating before getting around to the intimate part, hey, the getting to know each other by talking was working well). And well, she liked that. Money was not an issue. Back then she was making $27,000/yr and I was making $18,000/yr, so she didn't date me for my money....we worked at the same employer. But she knew that I had ambition and drive to do better in the future and so she stayed with me and I eventually did substantially better. An interesting note, I proposed to her after 2 years of dating. And when I proposed, she said Yes and said that it was about time as she was ready to say Yes six months earlier and was getting close to giving up on me. I never saw the signs that she was ready earlier. Of course you are probably wondering if I'm still married why am I watching this? Because I like to learn about different things on self-improvement and TH-cam makes that easy; I don't need or adopt all the advise, but it's interesting none the less. My advice as an introvert who isn't good at conversation to start (I'm not a quick thinker on my feet and need time to absorb and analyze details before going further), think of basic probing questions to ask on the first date. Then go home, and write some notes down. On later dates, think about what she said and look at your notes on the previous dates and then pre-write/remember deeper follow up questions. For example, if on the first date you find out she likes to snowboard, after asking about how long and where she likes to go, you start asking much deeper questions about why she likes it, what's that deep drive inside of her that makes that fun and interesting and you ask the right, sincere, meaningful questions you get her thinking introspectively about herself. My wife found that attractive as by the second date other guys she had dated were more focused on her boobs at that point.
We're in different times now, social media she would have guys lined up to take her out
Thank you for sharing! This is a pleasant read
@@heruvey87 Bingo
Well said, great advice, and proof that these things do work out if you stay true to yourself and not try to be someone you’re not in hopes of landing “the one”….thanks for sharing.
@@chiefbrody2173 lmao what. this is awful advice. its 2022 she would have had 1000 guys asked her out an message her on tinder/ig/facebook.
As an Introvert it is difficult, I've been told my "tiredness" after a day out is just an excuse to leave/escape and go home, to which some think that means I don't care or I'm not interested. I guess the key is to find someone who understands how introverts work cause they can be massively misunderstood.
I think the key thing irrespective of personality type is,
To find someone that actually wants to know the other person.
And to know them so deeply (be "in tune" with them) that they can start to feel what the other person is feeling..... when they start to feel it.
When both parties do this it is really beautiful,
Imagine an extravert and introvert (who are dating) go to a party,
It starts to get "a bit late" and the introvert is "done", the extrovert senses this and actually suggest to the introvert that they should look to head off soon.
And the reverse is also true, that the introvert though "done" can sense that the extrovert is having a good time and so puts off suggesting to leave.
read the unplugged alpha by rich. cooper
You either need to be wealthy, be in the top 5% of male looks, or have a really stand out attractive personality to get anywhere with women these days.. I hope you have 1 of the other 2 qualifications...
@@michaelangst6078 Or look elsewhere :-)
Your best bet is to find another introvert like yourself!
When I found out what an introvert was I remember thinking” 🤔 oh that’s why I find myself yawning at 7pm at dinners with huge groups of friends or just wanting to get back to reading my book when I was at parties lol”
😂 I completely relate!
Oh man! That just happened to me over the weekend. I can take large groups but for only a short period of time. I'm INFJ personality so it can be super strange for me.
read the unplugged alpha by rich. cooper
@@RR-et6zp I’ve seen his channel. He doesn’t seem happy to me.
Love these points, especially how introverts don't rush. This leads to well thought-out conversations and dates. Thanks for this video!
Channel name! 😂👌
Good points. I was pretty introverted in high school and part of college. Being an introvert as a guy is a major issue with dating. However, I did push myself to become more social and now I'm more of an ambivert. In the end, you can use some of your listening skills to enhance your dating experiences, but you still need to do more than usual compared to someone who is a natural extrovert
Thanks for sharing your experience!
"Natural extrovert".. I call BS here. In or extrovert is just a role you play for your own comfort. Get out of that comfortzone.
what is an ambivert?!
@@royalprince5696 basically means that you’re both depending on the circumstances. I’m the same way lolol
@@m.j.w. so you're gaining energy whether you're in a social setting or in private?
I definitely felt that reading the room moment the other night. I joined some coworkers to a Karaoke Bar. I really like singing, but I've never sung at Karaoke. Never liked the bar scene. Also most of the songs I know are show tunes, joke songs, or old songs ranging from drunken sailor, battle hymn of the republic, or 1950s big band songs. Most of the songs being sung were more modern and I thought it would be weird if I sang something really old. Well I noticed non of my coworkers were brave enough to go do Karaoke themselves and I figured since I like singing I should go up there and do it, but what really inspired me was seeing all the couples in the bar. Particularly one couple a table over who seemed really into each other. I had one song that would really fit with what I was seeing. So I overcame any anxiety I asked the DJ to play the song when I came up. When it finally was my turn I started singing "That's Amore" by Dean Martin and the bar just lit up. People cheered some got up and started dancing. When I was finished I got a lot of compliments, the DJ had a big smile and looked really impressed and the lady from that couple a table over complimented and gave me a thumbs up. Have to admit it was a real ego boost for me that night.
Looking back I think a mix of being a really unexpected, but well known and a very fun song along with the fact I knew how to sing the song well is why it was such a hit with the crowd. I don't think I would have picked that song if it wasn't for being able to look around and read the room.
From one introvert to another, preciate you Court! Focusing on my career and other priorities as I’m 24 and 3 months out of college, is important to me long before I think about putting a woman in my life.
Woohoo! You got it 🙌🏼
If you are an attractive sigma male women will ask you out.
This is not a guarantee. It can be just as intimidating as any attractive woman is to you.
🙌🔥
@@ExpertPenguin The beauty of it is that sigma males don't care whether the chick approaches or not.
Being authentic is the only way to fly.
Happy Friday, Courtney! I would consider myself both an extrovert and introvert as I'm outgoing with people but I definitely embrace my privacy. When I don't know someone well, I'm definitely going to be more introverted but as I get to know them, I will feel more comfortable to see if they're worth trusting or keep at distance. My girlfriend and I are totally different from each other but it evens out as it's a good balance between her and I
Appreciated hearing your insights!
I'm sorry but u cant be both an introvert and extrovert , it doesnt work like that
That's the definition of being an ambivert. An ambivert can be outgoing and sociable at times but all needs alone time as well.
@@royalprince5696 yes you can
@@iamme25yago That would be more of an introvert thing, no?
Thank you for doing a video on this subject. As an introvert myself, and single, I haven't been out on the dating scene lately. Yet, I remain in that constant state of self-improvement, and I do hope that I meet a high-quality lady someday that is also in a self-improvement mode as well. Because after all, if you want high quality, you have to be high quality.
Agreed! 🙌🔥
I don't agree with more
read the unplugged alpha by rich. cooper
This video speak to me exactly. Every point is something I do. Introvert through and through.
🙌🔥
I just don’t be knowing what to say man
I needed this video. I'm an introvert & found myself constantly overthinking situations & and getting out of my character(clingy). Taking a break from dating & social media, so I can learn more about myself and become a better man. Thanks Courtney 😊😊
I am all of those things combined: Introvert, insecure, shy, etc. I've given-up on trying to date a girl.
Best thing to do as an introvert: walk away, read a book, take martial arts, & focus on science. With the current dating scene she’ll likely be as single next month, if she’s not you dodged a bullet.
Everyday a new batch of vvomen turn 18/21/your-dealbreaker-age. Focus on yourself & walk away, you’re already better alone.
@@ricecakeboii94 wow who hurt you bro
@@frostyphish7149 no one. My time is valuable.
@@ricecakeboii94
I plan boxing. Feels better the exercise and honing in skills.
read the unplugged alpha by rich. cooper
Women in general prefer extroverts and charismatic people. Introvert men have it more difficult
One of the rare people who understand the difference between social anxiety and introversion 👏
Really interested in what to do, if, like me you are both introverted and socially anxious.
@@brentleask3877 Well first thing's first: don't be worried about any of it (as much as is possible right now). Strange as it may seem, but social anxiousness and introversion can both be attractive to women as long as you're genuine in your interactions. I'd say you should work on your social anxiety however you can but it may even go away to an extent or even fully simply through socialization. As far as introversion is concerned, I don't think that's a problem at all unless it's to an extent where you hate social activities or talking to people, in which case you've strayed into antisocial territory.
Being an introvert is a lot harder as a guy I think. Many women look to men to lead the energy and generate the spark on the date (and pull them into a positive vibe), and if you don't have the energy it can be an awkward uncomfortable date for both parties.
Awesomeness! Thanks for posting this! As an introvert, I can't handle too many people at once. So when I was with those 3 girls for 4th of July, I definitely was in my zone, relaxed, having fun, no pressure or anxiety
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Full support to you 😎👊👍
Thank you! I actually had a girl drop by going door to door for voter registration. She told me I had pretty eyes and naturally, I was being playful and we were talking about our dogs
@@tommygunn6901 enjoy the sweet times bro. You deserve it my friend 😉👏
@@tommygunn6901 Yeah Iove those moments.
First off I've been watching a lot of your videos on TH-cam and your mindset is so mature and easy going! I am currently going through a divorce and watching your videos has opened my eyes to a lot that was going on in the relationship not only on her side but on my own as well. I'm certainly going to be looking for so many of the things you explained in my next relationship whenever that time comes and your relaxed way of expressing it all made it all really easy to understand and sort of engrave into my head. Thank you for your dedication to spreading the word!
I like you! Have visited several other advice sites but you are my go to from now on. So soft and smooth with no drama or vulgarity- Thank you!
This video described majority of my dating life to a tee as I'm someone who is very patient and doesn't rush into anything when it comes to relationships. I'm very selective about what I want, and whenever I'm on dates with women I give just enough to keep them intrigued yet keep the cards close to my chest and allow the woman to find out things about me over time.
Love it! 🙌
I'm 46 and I'm more ambiverted these days but naturally I'm a introvert.. I still don't like big crowds and a big homebody. I'm perceived as "boring" by most women. I'm silly, goofy, friendly and mild manneted but I'm also direct, assertive. and no nonsense. I think my personality throws people off. I get them comfortable being them and they show their true colors, cause they think I'm weak...when I give that same energy back I'm labeled as "mean". I've dated here and there for 21 years... my problem isnt meeting women, it just never lasts very long after meeting them. Been single that long too. I'm 46. I'm at a point now where I'm happy being on my own.. I've learned to love it...now I don't care about meeting anyone lol.
Thanks for sharing, man
@@Lordran__ thanks for taking the time out to read it. I know it's kinda long...just thought it might be people similar to me and too let them know it's OK to be single, don't have to follow society's standards of happiness.
Ill be in the same boat when I’m your age brother. Some guys just have it. Others dont. I’m one of the ones that dont, and I’m perfectly fine with that
As an introvert my biggest challenge is securing a date, my biggest strength is the actual date. In a way this is the better problem to have.
I taught myself to be more assertive and this paired with my sympathy I find is a really attractive combination to women. (Eg. I'll plan the whole date, and take care of everything including parking. Meanwhile giving her options and asking for her input) I'm also naturally very curious about how things work, including understanding who people truely are. This takes form in me asking engaging and unique questions, making the conversations exciting and flow easy. What I'm really doing is updating the model I have of the other person lol
I'm quite observant and analytical so I'm able to quickly understand people. I notice small details and information they tell me to draw inferences that are often correct. This usually results in them feeling comfortable, feelings of chemistry and familiarity.
Basically if you're a nerd like me you can apply your critical thinking into exploring who your date really is and this naturally results in it going very well.
Same here -- so far I like pretty much everything I have in her model, my one and only big question so far is how tolerant she will be of our religious differences!
A positive video about introverts, but being painfully shy, having social anxiety all my life is not a positive thing, as commented previously I've tried NLP, CBT, group therapy, one to one talking therapy, reading self help books, breathing techniques and all have worked a bit but I've just got to live with the condition, I have had quite a few girlfriends but have been single for more than twenty years now, women get bored very easily and give up if you're not the outgoing type with fascinating conversation.
I’m 36, male, introvert but I’m not shy. I can be very social. I can talk to an entire room full of people especially women. My beef with being introverted is that my “social/emotional battery” gets drained. This requires me to more-or-less pull out of the public eye and “recharge” it’s mandatory. If I don’t respect this self-maintenance requirement, my mental health suffers and many times I have neglected this need to recharge for self care and have ended up with depression/anxiety. It took me many years to understand and realize that I was introverted and being introverted required unique self-care and maintenance. And yes, this has and will negatively impact my relationship with women because humans are social creatures and they need to socialize and connect emotionally. It’s hard to do this with introverts who can become burnt out from over-socializing even with a significant other. It’s unfair to have to deal with this.
I really appreciate your insight on being an introvert and how to utilize your strengths as an introvert. As one I will say it can be very challenging in many scenarios and especially dating. And like you said, it's sometimes more exhausting to do the "small talk thing" than it is to have a more deep/heartfelt conversation. It's good to know I'm not the only one that thinks this way. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol. Thank you for what you are doing with your channel Courtney! You really are making a difference. Keep up the good work! God bless you.
She posted this gem a couple of months ago
th-cam.com/video/HNBVNmcHNvs/w-d-xo.html
I had to read up on body language for work and it is so important to be able to read and communicate through it.
Really liked this one. Being an introvert allows me to create stronger bonds and to be very selective when it comes to create connections and relations with others. I wasn't considering being an introvert a good thing but I have learned the advantages and the strongest points of this trait. Thank you Courtney for covering this topic, it was brilliant!
I’m actually not introverted but I do watch these videos to help relate to my girlfriend who is. It’s definitely a good learning opportunity and I think it helps me be closer to her.
She posted this gem a couple of months ago
th-cam.com/video/HNBVNmcHNvs/w-d-xo.html
This actually made me feel a lot better about certain qualities of mine, it was a real confidence boost. You're so awesome Courtney, thank you so much for what you're doing. It has really helped me a lot just in the last few short weeks that I've started watching your content.
You never fail with these advice your go good at giving advice amazing video once again Courtney
You look so mature .i can't believe you are in your twenties
I am an introvert. But i think i am also shy. I don’t think my introversion gets in the way. Once i get comfortable around someone, I’ll talk.. and I’m really smart. I have spent a lot of time learning psychology and sociology. Ill make the conversation engaging and reflective. I think my shyness is my problem. I was bullied a lot in school growing up. I was a fat kid with autism. I was socially awkward and got picked on by family, friends, and girls.. I learned to be quiet and shy by getting rejected/made fun of over and over again. the fear of rejection can hurt so much more than the rejection itself. I’m self aware if my issues. I gotta talk more. People flirt with me all the time, and I quickly look away because i get anxious. It’s not a lack of confidence. It’s more like a self esteem issue. And words of affirmations to trick your brain is such foolish thinking. You’re picking up an ideal to fool yourself that you are a worthy human being. It’s just wishful thinking. I just need to expose myself. Let people see me.
Courtney, I'm so glad you defined "introvert" as something other than "shy" or "insecure".
I loooooooved the way you defined introverts. Breath of fresh air. 👍
Stellar piece, Courtney. I never felt so good about being introverted!
She made this lovely video a couple months back
th-cam.com/video/HNBVNmcHNvs/w-d-xo.html
Courtney Ryan introverted? Overwhelmed ? Stressed out? Furgit about it, you're a Superstar !
Great tips! And speaking of “Introverts…” Sigma Males are also Introverts - and they tend to do great with women!
It seems like a Sigma Male is the guy to be - they get the best of both worlds.
They’re not Beta Males, and they’re not necessarily Alpha Males either. They’re sort of in the middle.
They’re kind of Introverts, because they don’t want to be distracted by other people’s thoughts and views all the time.
They know what they want out of life, and they’re focused - and they wake up each morning ready, and they put their whole mind to it!
Anyway, that’s my two cents.
-Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
I don’t see many advantages to being introverted as a guy when it comes to dating.
But I have used it to my advantage in my career/business. In meetings, I’m good at listening and not feeling the need to always be the loudest in the room constantly talking. When I do speak, I make sure I’m saying something of value, which ironically has people leaving the meeting thinking I spoke more than I did since everything I said was relevant and added value
Don't be too introverted 😬I am very much so, and before i knew it , BOOM! It feels like life has passed me by. And that feeling has made me even more introverted.
I know the feeling 😔
Social anxiety is the worst. You want to fit in but people think you’re rude and stuck up. You’re mind is just in panic mode.
Confidence stems from quitting about giving a fuck. Improve your life but stop being preoccupied with what people expect you to be...Let me leave you with something. Know the fraise "when you fall off a horse get back on it again?". Next time get on, grab and twist that horses ears forcefully. Haymaker the thing if you have to. Then say "were gonna do this shit right this time mf or so help me". Be deliberate, despite results or approval.
100%
I am an introvert and very socially awkward. I am fine on stage in front of a crowd, or in front of a camera. The guy on stage is just a musician and hiding behind an instrument. He's not really me. Making my TH-cam videos, it is just me talking out loud and a camera just happens to be catching it on video. However, when I have to talk individually to people, especially trying to do a date, that's when I fall apart. I do not get many first dates, and I almost never get a second date.
As a shy, introverted guy with social anxiety and battling depression, I thought I was doomed to be alone forever because I could not approach women and talk to them. But after over 10 years of searching, I finally found a woman who could overlook those problems I had. Thank God for internet dating sites where my social anxiety and shyness did not holding me back from contacting women online and talking to them. Real life first meeting was the hard part, but after over a month of talking, I was prepared and it went well. Glad I did not give up.
Quiet people always know more than they seem. Although very normal, their inner world is by default fronted mysterious and therefore assumed weird. Never underestimate the social awareness and sense of reality in a quiet person; they are some of the most observant, absorbent persons of all.
Starting therapy again next week. Hopefully I can get to use these videos one day.
Thank you Courtney! Being an outgoing introvert helps me be more authentic. Standing next to the woman I would like to meet, I often got tongue-tied. I'm ok with that now and just make small talk just to make a start......and take it from there.
I am an introvert and this video really shows that she knows what she is talking about, im not exactly shy and im definetly at my strongest when in a 1 on 1 conversation, but my problem is getting there, how to get a date? Dating apps are not working, bars are not really my thing and i dont feel comfortable forcing myself to start a new hobby i dont like just to meet women.
Thank you for posting this awesome dating advice video 🙂
It’s my pleasure! 😇
Being an introvert sucks nobody notice me
Girls prefer extrovert the laud one
I feel I pay more attention to my surroundings and can read people alot better. I have a very strong intuition.
Courtney you are so smart and beautiful my friend. Thanks for helping us introverts out in dating!
I want to talk to you about a situation with an ex involving human trafficking, drug dealing, prostitution, and how I knew about NONE of it while I was “dating” her for a year and a half. Please, this is very important and I would love some guidance.
Speak with the police
@@cornevanerk9981 I tried. They only tell me that they can’t help.
6:12 we value meaningful and deep connections and not just surface level shallow relationships
Yes, if only my friends understood this.
What makes you think introverts want to date? Some of us much prefer peace and quiet.
Stumbled across a few of your videos, Big ups to you. Especially for this one, I'd say I'm an introvert. You are definitely doing a service for all of us out here big UPS to you again May life continue to bless you
Wow!!! You really had me pegged! It’s like you were reading my biography. Thanks for the wonderful info.
As a introvert I thought I was doing ok talking to a girl. Talked to her for months. She was showing interest. Wanted to learn more about me. Finally made my move with roses and a teddy bear. Then find out she isn't single. Might be the end for this sigma. 😕
Awww thanks for sharing your experience! 💛
talking to a girl for months before you made your move? Dude! That's just a waste of time. It's also inherently unattractive to any girl and it communicates lack of confidence and indecision. You should be asking a girl out within the first few exchanges - test her attraction early on. If it's not there, move on yo the next girl. And flowers and a Teddy Bear? That's for GFs in their birthday, not some chick you're asking out for the first time.
@@jleano609 sorry I'm not a Playa like you. Lol. I don't let people get that close to me quickly. It pissed you off more then it did me that's what I find funny.
She used you for her entertainment
@@Outlaw4640 I’m no player in fact I’m pretty introverted too. The simple fact is this though. Being confident and decisive are majorly attractive for women. The more time you spend with a woman where you don’t escalate and instead tell her more and more information about yourself, the more she sees you as a friend instead of a potential lover. This is because there is no excitement or emotional tension and having that “spiking” is what gets her into you.
Also it’s kind of “sneaky f@cker” game to play “we’re just friends” with a girl first and then switch to “surprise! I fancy you!” That’s what Nice Guys do, because they lack the confidence to be authentic. And women thus hate Nice Guy Sneaky F@ckers.
So Sigma, when you meet a girl you like, move fairly quickly. If it’s texting you’ve got 24hrs max to ask for a coffee date. If face to face it really should be at the end of your FIRST conversation. It’s honest and direct. Plus you’re not wasting time because you’re testing her attraction early on. If she says NO then you can just NEXT her and talk to someone else.
I'm an introvert too. Really great advice from you Courtney ☺️ This will help me with my future dates
I don't think I can find your WhatsApp account 🥺
People said I am introvert because I don’t speak in public or in a big group. However, I can talk to strangers or my dates for an hour easily and not sure if I am not still introvert.
I'm a Introvert. I embrace it. Thanks Courtney!
th-cam.com/video/HNBVNmcHNvs/w-d-xo.html another great Courtney take on introversion
I think you are wrong about knowing what you want because of being alone.
I've found that being alone has not brought me the clarity of knowing what I want because of lack of experience figuring it out.
But that's just me.
Courtney live stream with a friend hopefully soon
Forgot to mention that he shall be tall and physically attractive. If yes, then it doesn't matter if he is an extrovert or introvert, women will come up with any reason why it is good. If he is not attractive, the same qualities will be perceived as bad.
Looks absolutely matter but we must focus in what we can do. Dress well, do some exercise, try to improve your social skills.
I'm going to keep repeating myself to every guy that brings this up. Not every woman cares if your tall! I'm 5.2 I prefer guys closer to my height. I am attracted to guys that also wear glasses. And I would date someone shorter or even in a wheelchair. Because what matters is who you are as a person. Same with money I don't care how much you have! Just have a stable job and pay your bills on time to show you handle your money wisely.
Every one is a 10 to someone. 🖖🌺
This sounds like cope to me
this will sound strange.. but this is what it means when people tell u dont be creepy, dont be weird.. it means ur not calibrating to the moment, ur just not there, not present, but u cant calibrate to the moment couse ur stuck in ur head and ur denying all the anxiety and fear ur feeling .. when u feel something - anxiety, fear, insecurities etc.. dont deny it, dont hide it.. accept it, enjoy it, have fun.. from there u can calibrate to the moment and ull be more aware in general.. trust me it does wonders to ur life in every area.. i hope atleast one guy is able to realise his potential from reading this comment
Ambivert right here! Sometimes, my qualities are more introverted than it ever is extroverted.
I'm different from most other introverts then apparently as I have NO ISSUES with confrontation. Confrontation and conflict are not synonymous, but they are often easily confused.
I don't care one bit what anyone thinks, if someone says something that is WAY off base from the truth, I will tell them that as well as why that is. I try not to do so in an inherently disrespectful or "rude" way or with too much animation/emotion, but if their level of authority renders them contextually irresponsible, that certainly could be a part of the examination as well. If someone is acting in a way or in belief of something which is *objectively dishonorable/disrespectful,* I don't care very much about their emotion or my own when I tell them what they've done. Emotion as a whole is practically an invalid factor regardless, yet so many people still think it is the end-all be-all of what makes a person. Too many want to *_self-identity_* themselves as "empaths" these days, and the irony of that reality is quite hilarious to me.
If someone values emotion over truth, then their emotions are TRULY baseless. Truth is NOT controlled by emotion, it's vice versa.
I struggle to even start and keep a conversation going, talking has always been my weakest part of my game, I could definitely improve there
Being introverted for myself is a-lot more peaceful than being surrounded by others who want constant drama. I value peace and quiet
Good morning from NYC😉
Good morning! 🤍
🥉
Thank you Courtney. I appreciate your perspective.
If attractive guy is introvert he is seen as mysterious, but if unattractive guy is introvert he is seen as creepy. So Rule #1 is be attractive.
FYI doing the slow "cat blink" towards human females..... DOES NOT WORK!!!!!
Your inspiring, made me think twice about myself. Thank you loving the content 😊
yes i'm an introvert too
Courtney says she is an introvert. I've watched several of her videos. She'll periodically say that when she was younger, she'd go out with her friends to bars, or she dated several men who eventually made her a better person, or used to go to parties and was in conversations with couples there. That's not being an introvert! An introvert is me: I don't go out, I don't hang out with people, and I like living alone and not talk to my neighbors. Now that's being an introvert.
I was taken to a psychologist and later a psychiatrist 💉 for "not wanting to go outside." A real deal. My imagination is my friend.
as an introvert, i dont even talk much as well as being a quiet person. so dating would be a bit hard as trying to find things to say.
Hi Courtney, new to your channel, like what I’m hearing. Anyway, you referred to guys that are ‘needy’ or use ‘you complete me’ speak as very unattractive, and I would agree. On another woman’s ‘men’s advice’ channel, she also described needy and ‘you complete me’ traits as “very off putting” and that basically if a guy has his stuff together and can show that he doesn’t ‘need’ a woman, that is when he will become more attractive to women, and women will naturally want to “stand by” that kind of man, in a nutshell. Well, a lot of the commenters slammed her for telling a fairy tale and “she’ll leave you anyway when she gets bored”. Just an observation but it was really interesting to see to how completely opposite the two sides were. Some of the guys had a couple interesting points that I wish she would respond to. I also wonder if her points were taken a little too literally maybe. Anyway, like your channel, and keep up the good work!
Love these videos of Courtney Ryan they are very helpful. The pic on the cover is a very attractive shot of ya.
We are very good listeners and we study people silently but it’s a lot of struggles
Introverts of the world: UNITE! Separately.
Dyslexic Introverts of the world: UNTIE!
😊😊😊
{FWIW: While I am not dyslexic, I am DEFINITELY an introvert. AND have ADHD, which unfortunately WAS NOT DIAGNOSED until I was around 38 years old...🙄}
Personality types go across the board. Some grow up shy and introspective, and later become more extroverted as they get more friends and become more social. Hard to say how much the 2 traits could overlap in some people. Extroverts can have a shy introverted side too. I know there are pure versions of both, but I feel like I have some of both traits. I'm introspective, but not a true introvert or extrovert.
I gotta say, I really love your hair here.
Wow! Your hair styling on the thumbnail was really attractive. Just had to say this out loud. Another fine video from you.
All great points ma lady, keep em coming!
Thanks from the UK 🇬🇧😌
It is so ironic how many introvert traits i seem to have, thankfully fear is not among that group in any form. Perhaps i should focus on introverts when, and if, i ever solve two issues i have at dealing with people.
“You’re killin me smalls.” Working hard and looking good Courtney.
Be proud to be who you are.
Great video Courtney. Thanks. I'm an introvert.
Am I the only person who was bothered in the first scene when the guy didn't standup to greet his date?
Yes! It's 2022...nobody cares.
While I've always known this and practiced it (so this video only affirms things for me, and doesn't necessarily help me), I'm sure there are many that have been told "if you're introverted, you're doomed." This video certainly dispels that notion.
I would say, however, that being an introvert does not always guarantee someone self-reflects--so I appreciate you including that point for those who have not done so, or not looked at their lives analytically.
Of course the caveat is this is helpful IF a guy manages to find a female that will appreciate it. I've attracted many females because of my listening skills (and could have blackmailed a few had I wanted because yes they did tell me way too much personal information), but it begs the question "will the female truly appreciate it and value the guy with that trait?" Too many want the attention and support, but don't commit themselves to making it a relationship these days.
This thumbnail is the best one
Court just be u on them thumbnails lmao this one was wild
Introvert on the border of social anxiety disorder, I have no problems BEING in public/groups, but interacting is virtually impossible.
Got to go get counseling.
Everything is true
I use all this
@+①③⓪③④⑨①④⑧③⑧Whatsapp shut up
Nice content. Would love if you did a video on why women prefer the shallow, dog-n-pony shows of extroverts.
I'm definitely an introvert to say the least. Taking my time and listening to everything said etc., so I'm not wasting my time. It keeps me respectful and humble towards a woman. I find that I can then proceed to be more confident which opens up doors for humor. I really enjoy laughing together even at my own expense. Btw Courtney! I love your thumbnail picture in this video. Looks different yet very nice. Have a great day and weekend!
How do i, as an introvert date?
It's quite simple; i don't.
I avoid people like the plague.
Relatable to say the least
I relate to everything you said as an introvert. Thanks for this video.