Wonderful video My partnership of five years ended a month ago. When my true love decided to part ways with me, it truly is the only thing on my mind. I can't fathom my life with anyone else, and even though I've tried everything to get him back, it's all in vain. Despite my best efforts to put him out of my thoughts, I can't help but miss him and think about him all the time. I could not really tell you why I am saying this.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
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1:01 Show up for youself 2:09 Natural approach 3:00 Make eye contact 4:08 Smile 4:50 Mirror her movements 5:24 Be a good listener 6:29 Give a complement 7:41 Humor/teasing 9:19 Don't be a SIMP
@@A.blue558 I was tied down for 10 years now im single and where I work is paradise for a single young hung man like myself:^) why pork one when you can pork them all . Now I get to try so many different flavors and loving it .
I feel confident in myself and what I bring to the table, but...so often I feel myself struggling to think of anything interesting, witty, funny, or flirty to say 😂 it's like my brain shuts halfway off. Especially if the girl is exceptionally pretty. Thank you Courtney!
Well there is nothing wrong with ending it early and leaving some mystery behind. That will give you both sometime to maybe think about something to talk about if not go over the previous encounter
@@ayyjayy2583 not everyone experiences it though. While I agree understanding they are just another person is important, it’s more important to be okay with an awkward silence, or a lack of reciprocity. You are not there to entertain her, you are communicating as equals. Sometimes just holding a gaze with a slight smirk is all it takes, not filling up every silence with more words
Learning to be charismatic around anyone and not just women definitely helps. If you can talk to any kind of person in any situation it makes being flirty a lot easier.
I think for a lot of men the issue is anxiety to even approach. Most people can pick up social cues and keep a conversation flowing, it's the fear of rejection that keeps many men from making connections. It's important to remind yourself that you are in your own head and nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Control your mind and approach a woman for what she is, another human being that is no better than you or I, and you deserve a chance at happiness just like anyone else
One thing I tell guys along this line is "it's not like all the women who have ever said no to you meet in a place somewhere to discuss and blog about you -- they aren't a mob -- effectively they are one person." So it doesn't matter if twenty say no to you, any more than it matters when one says no to you. Move on. You are looking for the one who says "sure, let's have a drink together, see where it goes."
I was flirting with a girl last night at the gym I work at. Of course I was on the clock working the front desk but I noticed she seemed to be sitting watching me and in no apparent hurry to leave after my coworker left. We got talking and she was smiling and laughing a lot which made me reciprocate it. It felt so good because it's been so long since I've had that feeling. I was pretty nervous but I reached for the stars and told her I thought she was beautiful with a big smile on my face. I ended up getting her phone number so hopefully we keep talking! Thanks again for another great video Courtney!
In my experience it does not mean much if a girl gives you her number. I got many numbers when I was in that dating thing in my youth, but the phone numbers were either fake (on purpose - I always recalled the phone number to her to make sure that I did not mishear a digit) or they just didn't react to anything. Girls are driven by their emotions, they - in my experience - have no rational mind, so the one evening you have a good talk and fun with her and she acts like she likes you and then when you try to call her she is like a complete other person, like she never got to know you. Also most of them are notorious liars and manipulative as hell. If you give them any chance to do, they will screw you up. So, I got used to keep emotional distance to them, that's the best way to handle them. And when they start acting like a piece of sh*t, for example if they are bitching because of small things, I drop them. Also, because I know how women are (maybe there are exceptions, but if they exist I did not met any of them yet in my life) I will never mary one of them (this is just too risky for me as a guy and I can not get any real value out of it) and only will gets kids with one that I am sure will not be like the ones I met. Usually girls reveal their true nature after about 6 months, sometimes a lot earlier. If you for example, tell her (girl a - the "prospect" that seems to be interested in you), that you think this other girl b is hot and the other girl b suddenly avoids you, then you know that you immediately should drop girl a, as that means she tell bullshit about you in your absence. She will really bring a lot of trouble into your life and will not add any value to it. But you will experience such bullshit within the first 6 to 8 months since you started talking to them. If you did not notice such behaviour after 12 months you still should keep an eye open, but you probably have found one of the very rare unicorns that you should keep.
Great work. When you call her, her buying temperature may fall off a bit-- she's most likely in a different context. So you want to call back to some of the humor, experiences, etc. you had when you first met her. From there, once she's back in a good mood, schedule an in person meetup, and then get off the phone when things are on a high note. 😉
Courtney, I just wanna say ever since I broke up with my last gf a little over a year now, your channel among others has helped me to find myself and reinvent myself. I’m still a work in progress but I’ve never felt better about myself. From fitness, to style and grooming to knowing how to better communicate and use positive body language. Just wanna say thank you!
*I love how you emphasize the importance of body language and genuine connection. Flirting should be fun, not stressful, and your advice really helps with that!*
I'm glad I came across this video. I've finally landed my dream career (or at least the first serious step of it) and am about to land my own place. I feel like I will be ready to start dating soon. This will be my first time dating since 2014.
Excellent Rundown and Explanations!! For me, internal confidence ( working on showing up for myself mentally and not being a simp like doing anything to get someone to like me) as well as eye contact are 2 key components I definitely still need to work on the most. Really appreciate your insight bc I want to grow and become more comfortable & mature about putting myself out there and enjoy my time when I’m out at social gatherings.
Successful flirting is a continuous balancing act between tension and easing tension; polarization and comfort provision; being socially calibrated and riding the razor's edge; showing her you're not afraid to push her buttons but you know how to do it with care and grace.
No doubt, particularly for introverted and socially anxious people. For them, they already hate small-talk, but flirting is a small-talk binging hoedown. But unfortunately, it's a nessesary ritual that's part and parcel to the courting process in the mating and dating game.
I can't see women all that well do to my visual impairment, especially in the dark. But I have found a good tip for anyone in my situation is that a lovely voice for me goes a long way. I will often compliment a woman if she has a lovely voice. It always seems to make the day of whoever I'm telling this to.
I always like to set a frame that they’re annoying me. One girl I see at the gym regularly I will say something with a smile like, “oh no not you. What do you want?” It gets a laugh every time. Playful debates work great too
Of course they do. That’s why In person works better than dating apps because women often won’t show personality to work from and be playful. I have to find gyms you’re at. Gyms I go to women have headphones on and act like they don’t want to be bothered.
Yeah it is definitely important to pay attention to the environment because then it does give you an idea how to break the ice, or at least have the chance to get people laughing, even if that means talking to somebody else while getting the girl's attention, and if she gives multiple cues, like lots of eye contact, that is typically when you should go and at least introduce yourself. If you can be subtle and playful without being direct, sometimes that can be stimulating without being creepy or perverted and I know some guys struggle with how to ignite an ember or even feed the flame once it's already there
This shit is annoying. What environment at a bar that has stuff to talk about or funny? That’s why I don’t approach because you shouldn’t have to put the pressure of being funny right off the bat. If you’re trying to be funny you’ll usually come off as forced or not funny. That’s why workplace classroom or co Ed sports work well for me. Because you’re naturally talking with someone and in those convos you find funny things and quips. This stuff you write is funny, because it’s like “be funny” on the spot, so if that’s hard for a guy he’s less funny? But ironically when he’s in conversation naturally and comfortable he’s funnier than these guys who have these on the spot funny cues. Those same guys on cue funny things at first approach more often aren’t making women laugh and ppl constantly in general in every day situations. Some ppl just have to warm up but naturally funny guys can do it overall but might have to warm up first.
I think I heard this video at the right time because I feel that it's about time I start going back out and testing the waters. I'm 23, but fell out of the dating scene because I felt like I needed to improve myself, and not time to start dating yet. Now that I feel that I'm in the right place in my life. I just needed confidence, and this video really gave it to me. Thanks Courtney, you're the best! 😂
" going back out and testing the waters. I'm 23" You sure SOUND 23. You should know what's going on these days. See the videos called "Why men stopped dating". Men are boycotting women and even the bars and gyms where women prey on men. And check out "Female dating strategy"
I think like dancing, good flirting requires both parties to be contributing to make it work. You can be an amazing flirt but if the girl is playing too hard to get it will totally kill the vibe. I used to be considered a huge flirt in elementary school and highschool. It's quite difficult to do with a stranger that's more teasing/banter, I think flirting only happens when you already have some rapport.
I have to say this Courtney! You are the best speaker I've seen who shares a woman's perspective so amazingly! Love the content you create! Keep creating Ma'am!⭐
1, Be wealthy 2. Be top 20% in physical attractiveness 3. Be famous 4-9. Posses unflinching confidence that cannot be undermined by any number of rejections or bad experiences so you can be called cocky and arrogant.
Even a handsome guy can creep out a woman he attempts flirtation with if he's socially awkward. I was that guy at 21. Several people told me I looked very good and those who didnt know me, assumed i either had a wife or gf. I was lonely. I was very shy. I couldnt spot a hint to save my life. And yes, I even creeped out some women by accident. Being a very good looking as a guy, is absolutely zero shield against being rejected by women, even embarassingly so. I absolutely hate that famous meme of the handsome office guy vs the fat nerdy guy complimenting a workplace woman.
@@johnmarks714 While I have had the same experience as you, please try to imagine the same situation except she starts off as not having any interest. You can easily lose her interest, but when you're handsome it's your chance to lose. You don't have to create a chance from scratch
I've thought about this quite a bit. I'd put it just a little bit differently. If a a woman likes you she will laugh at pretty much anything you say (to reassure you that she is interested , maybe not decided yet, but interested). If you are ugly,, shy or whatever. Then I suggest waiting. I'm not a qualified counsellor or anything so see if others agree: -Wait for her to make the first move. She knows how you feel; most women can 'read' most men. Women can't 'read' the flattering charming cheats liars and skunks of course, Nut normal guys pose little problem. If she thinks there's something between you; she won't let the opportunity pass. And if she weakens her friends will embolden her. And when you get the full treatment - eyes, smile, proximity etc - your self consciousness will vanish and you can do your stuff. - flirting and on Just try not go though the ceiling when she does. Stay cool good luck
Another thing you might add / comment on with respect to meeting girls -- it's about 3 key factors a lot of guys get wrong, one of which you mention here: context, energy and timing. All 3 are key for a man who has "game" in flirting with women (I hate that word, but it's the only one that captures the idea of skill at meeting women). Context = environment, as you point out here; energy is down to the physical energy she is giving off, esp. when interacting with us as a man, and it's also a relative marker (vis-a-vis other people); and timing = making sure you approach her at the right moment (I see a lot of guys - even with a bartender who might like them - bothering her while she is serving someone else, etc.). This is annoying and not cool, and choosing the wrong moment to approach can make an otherwise skilled man look lame and slightly desperate. Timing does matter b/c it shows thoughtfulness and maximises your chance of a favourable response. Anyway, just a few ideas I wanted to contribute, which I have used myself and helped other guys with over the years. Cheers.
Love the multiple perspectives. Strong women with different views, some overlap in paradigms but really fantastic individuals that are unique. Great work. You are providing amazing insights and your production values rock! Don’t stop.
While I agree with all the points, the biggest issue for most people is that flirting is very similar to athletic or musical performance: the best performances are when you're in the zone or what science calls the flow state. And the only way to achieve that is the same way the best athletes and musicians get there: practice, practice, practice! You get better at everything you practice a lot, and ironically the harder you try when putting pressure on yourself to succeed, often the worse you will fail. Just put yourself out there and don't take it too seriously. You got this. 😊
good point it;s tough when you have high expectations tho. You know you're very funny and charming, but that comes out when youre comfortable. So a matter of being comfortable with an initial conversation
My best pickup line: Hi. I'm Scott. What's your name? Seriously. This has worked for me. I mean....it doesn't have to be some Shakespearian Sonnet or the One Liner of Heaven Itself. I think my best advice is to quiet your expectations. Don't expect...just flow. You fear because you desire. Lessen desire, and you lessen anxiety. And you get more of the interaction you wanted. Be ready to accept anything, even rejection, with equal satisfaction. If she rejects you, at least she didn't waste your time.
Men, confidence is simple. Build credibility with yourself through repeated action, not necessarily results. A strong self image translates into more than just words spoken, it affects pitch, body language and the look in your eyes. Understand outcome independence. Enter the conversation for the sake of the conversation, not a desired result. Speak to women as if you already know them, speak to them just as casually as you would speak to your bro. Don’t aim to prove anything. Let your lifestyle and the way you carry yourself speak for itself. Do not compromise your principles to appear agreeable, communicate with honor, respect and honesty, and confidence will no longer matter. Women love a man who is secure with himself. My upload schedule begins tomorrow, hope you see you there.
@A walrus compare how you play a video game you really like VS how you try to approach women. In both cases you want to do well, but the motivations are very different. If you keep losing at the video game, my guess is that while u may be frustrated, your self esteem doesnt hit the toilet. You either keep trying, look up some walkthroughs or even move on to something else. Takeaway: you dont take it personally. If you however get rejected especially by a pretty woman, I'm guessing your whole self image goes to hell. You feel like shit and obsess. Takeaway: you took it very seriously, as an indictment against your self worth.
@@johnmarks714 it also sucks if you haven't gotten laid in a while and patience has to be there or else a man will look desperate but it can be hard to not want outcomes to go well. Because a man would hope things go well sooner than later. The longer it is, the longer the dry spell
@@miamiman24 it is what it is. If necessary, save up money for a trip to Tijuana, Mexico OR Thailand etc. In those places, prostitution is legal. Get it out of your system.
@@johnmarks714 that won’t help if that desire is ego based too. If you feel you’re attractive it will be hard to not have high expectations of doing well. If things don’t go well it can be frustrating and almost feel confusing. Plus I don’t know why a self respected man would be satisfied getting with a hooker. It’s like a talented bowler using bunker lanes when bowling. Leave that for the average birds who suck at bowling. Plus if a man wants to not waste time sowing oats. Would suck for time going by and oats not sowed so he can be content put it in the past then be ready for a relationship. But instead things drag on longer than expected based on the man’s wit, charm humor and strong traits. So meets a woman that’s great but not satisfied with his love life prior so can’t and will not commit. That would suck and add more regrets. So the sooner things work out the better but yeah it’s good to not have a time frame or place expectations. But it’s hard when you feel you have a high ceiling in such regard.
Don't want to be too forward or too subtle. By definition, flirting is a way to show interest. Flirting should be fun. 1. Show up for yourself -Make a good first impression -Dress well, groom well, hygiene 2. Go for natural approach -use your surroundings to inspiring conversation -THEN if going well, introduce yourself -be able to read and see if she's flirting back 3. Make eye contact -look away regularly -be playful with eye contact -don't stare/stalk -if she smiles, it's a good sign 4. SMILE -look warm and approachable -playful looks and smirks 5. Mirror her movement -see if she mirrors yours too 6. Be a good listener -can't flirt if you don't listen -keeps the conversation going -ask open ended questions 7. Give a compliment -genuine, honest -I had to come over and tell you I like your style -nothing about her physical attributes -no pick up lines 8. Humor and Teasing -puts her at ease -be playful when appropriate (read the room) -inside jokes really work well 9. Don't be a SIMP -you just met, no need to put her on a pedestal -know when to walk away when it's going nowhere
Very useful and insightful video Courtney. Good work ! Joey Tribianni's flirtatious "How you doin'?" was admittedly hilarious on Friends. But in real life, you are giving very sound advice when you suggest dropping the pre-meditated pick up lines -- to be more real and authentic in a way that can make someone feel that your attraction is unique to them in particular (and not a cheesy, pre-meditated and rehearsed pick-up-line-ploy).
Another one I would add, if you’re out socially and alcohol is involved, make sure you don’t drink too much. Make sure you are fully in control. Flirting after one drink is easy, many more and you won’t come across well!
One thing I’ve always noticed that works well in a party/bar scenario is to end the initial conversation after a few minutes of talking and then follow up later
These are all great but I just wanted to make one note. Your style might not necessarily line with hers. Dress for success should be with dressing for success with your own style. It should make you feel confident. Personally I've had way more success in dating when I dress how I want to dress and not how other people tell me to. Always have amazing hygiene but have your own style that makes you feel confident in yourself. You'll attract the person you actually want to be with long term.
From my experience, even trying out all of these tips & tricks doesn’t guarantee that a man won’t end up being friendzoned. Humour/playfulness/teasing can also be seen as a mere friendly gestures by a woman. I have come to believe that there’s more to eye contact, smile, & physical touch - the way it is done - which helps to convey sexual attraction/true intention clearly. It would help if you can delve deeply into the right & flirty way to make eye contact, smile, and touch.
CR: "Flirting should be fun. It shouldn't be something that stresses you out or that you dread." Also CR: "First impressions are crucial for initial interactions and attraction...making sure to present the best you...is very important." 😑
@@cuongbui9708 of course they can both be true, that's not beyond possibility, esp if you're in the right headspace and given your experience level. But, what's more likely? It's sort of like saying you can have fun at an interview at a highly sought after job. Sure you can be cool and collected and make light of it, which would probably be better for you ultimately, but that's easier said than done, esp from the outside looking in. To easily expect/suggest that of someone in the situation isn't realistic, bc that situation is naturally and understandably stress inducing.
Question: I was told strong eye contact is essential. I was also told that looking away first as a man shows weakness. I was also told that not looking away first is creepy behavior that scares women. So which is it?
I'll let you in on a little trick, when you start talking look at her left eye then slowly move your gaze to her lips and then to the right eye. Don't know why but this works. Second remember that your trying to flirt and not train a dog, have fun don't worry about showing weakness.
I think one great tip to make it easier to flirt is to find the right "setting"... you want to be in a comfortable situation, and in a "good mood" and you can actually tweak your mood by doing some sport or listening to some good music and you can try to find the best activities where to be flirty. Also speaking about what is going in your mind and making fun of yourself is always a good start that makes you look confident even to joke about yourself
This is extremely important, hey Courtney this video is great. I usually need tips on how to improve ways to connect with woman in different places, single guy still waiting for the big thing to happen in my life. God knows this and probably hasn't happened yet because the wait may be awhile yet but always looking to improve my attraction to the opposite sex. Really informative and hopefully on the rise like he should be 🔝🔴🌞🤴⛪
Being myself usually works. I just go with the flow and enjoy the time spent when communicating. Don’t try to force anything but take one step at a time and allow her to enjoy her time in the conversation.
The best advice I’ve ever heard is adopting the mindset of “flirting with the world”. If you can be charismatic in as many settings as possible, you won’t have to turn it on - you’ll always be on!
The playful tease is my bread and butter. Like Corey Wayne some what said ‘treat her like a bratty little sister’. It’s also a good way to see if they are confident in themselves.
Flirting is most effective when you are interested. It may help the structured individual to tell yourself, "I am ready to meet someone and have fun with someone. When I see someone I am interested in, it is ok to be PLAYFUL and follow Courtney Ryan's advice." Please don't force the flirtation.
Flirting is an art form Get creative and just have fun with it Don’t try too hard just keep it cool comfortable and casual Expect nothing out of it - let her chase you if she’s interested It’s all done ad lib, on the spot, in the moment, not a single thing preplanned 😄 Done 👉🏼
What sucks is that Courtney makes it sound so easy to flirt and get a woman interested in u but honestly it’s one of the most strategic things u will ever do in your life. It’s like studying The Art of War but for dating. U have to have a worst case and best case scenario in your mind so that u know how to recover or flourish properly. Also know what to say and what not to say as well as your actions. People say dating is fun and from my personal experience, it’s not. And also, if your looks are not good enough for a woman, height, or d size, you’re already at a major disadvantage. Most modern women will make u chase them because they never make it easy for us men to even try and pursue them nowadays. They test us or play hard to get and personally, I don’t got time for that BS. It’s sad that most modern women think like this but it is what it is.
I feel like these are really just tips for how to appear confident, but I didn't get much from this in terms of how to FLIRT. I know how to project confidence in general, but I struggle with moving conversation from friendly to flirty. That's what I was hoping to get out of this.
Flirting is a ton of fun, even when there's no other goal than having fun. One could easily replace "flirting" with "joking around." And of course if flirting leads to something more, great. But flirting can and should be stress-free.
Important: don’t be an idiot who tries to do all of these at once. Trying makes it unnatural. Bringing out the ones you can is what you want. If you’re coming significantly short on something, maybe think about why that is and what you can do about that in stead of forcing doing it anyway. You don’t just DO confidence. Fake it ‘till you make it doesn’t mean you’re faking it well. Courtney gave the good tip of dressing well, which coincidentally worked for me. Same goes for things like eye contact and all. Some of these you can learn by trying, but not by juggling all the others at the same time. And just imagine trying to fake a sense of humour… Just don’t. Find confidence for your own sake and go from there. I’d suggest just starting with dressing a way that makes you feel confident, that will make most of these come naturally. It really does work. Also, Compliments is also an important yet easy one, but try and just learn to give platonic compliments to people before you go awkwardly telling women, “Y- you’re really hot, you know that.” Just start with learning to notice, “oh hi mom! Your hair looks nice today.” That way you know how to make sincere compliments and don’t even give Away too obviously that you’re TRYING to flirt when you do. If you say it just to flirt, it’s much harder for it not to end up coming out awkward. Hair is an easy one. If someone, even men, have a haircut that looks nice that day, say it, just to make them happy. Who knows, you might even get some attention without even trying to. I have. Sincere compliments work, and sincerity comes over far more confidently than just being brave enough to force out a compliment.
Courtney, when you give men advice, which age group of women are you referring to? I think 20's 30's and 40's women have a different level of maturity level.
Ask any older person, not just a woman, how old they feel inside, and it will almost always be in their 20’s. What you are calling “maturity” is really just more life experiences, not maturity level. The principles to talk to women do not change based on age, the only thing that might change is one’s vernacular, as younger people (not just women) speak differently than older people. But, again the principles don’t change at all.
@@causalitymastered While statistically that is true, I'll bet anytime on a 35yrs old fit girl vs a 25yrs obese girl who gorges on junk and doesn't exercise. Moreover, raising a baby requires mental fortitude...does a 20yrs old have it? And do you have enough to compensate for her?
@@makingmodernmen8843 dude everyone matures. Nobody is the same in their 30s and 40s as they were in their 20’s. Where do you hear this shit? Are you the same?
Girl asked me to go out after work as a group for some drinks , I said "I don't know I am pretty busy " she said "Oh good answer" act like your time is of value and they will be lucky to share time with you. I did go in the end and I have a pretty long last name so I like to ask people where they think my name is from, always a good one .
I can't believe you said that about the skirt. I use that all the time. "I like your skirt. I have the same one at home but didn't want to shave my legs." 😂
Great tips! “Confidence” is probably the #1 thing you’ll need before you approach any woman… And have no agenda, just relax, and talk to her like a human being - because women are people, whether you choose to believe that, or not! Lol But seriously, behave around her like you would with your friends, that way - she’ll let her guard down, and perhaps, let you get to know her! Just remember, it’s your job to put her mind at ease, if you can do that - amazing things will start to happen! Anyway, that’s my two cents. -Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
We are all people. Celebrities and professional athletes are people, but fans worship them as if they are gods. And the media just further proves this.
Why do men alway put women in some weird pedestal and then complain women being on that same pedestal they themselves put us? Like could you just once treat us like normal human beings that we are?
Great video, You make it so sound easy for us to master the art of Flirting. Like most everything, Practice makes Perfect! Practice, Practice, Practice!
I know how you feel. I am the same way. I can't approach women and be flirty with then, either due to my shyness. Or maybe it's out of the fear of being rejected.
Do you gym brother? Highly recommend doing heavy compounds will get your t levels flowing through the roof. That surge of t will give you the confidence
Step 0: Be attractive. This is the most important step fellas. If you are a 1-4 caliber guy flirting, no matter how perfect you are at it will not work. You'll just be seen as creepy. If you are a 5-8, these tips can work. Of you are a 9-10 Chad, it doesn't matter what you say it do, a woman will be attracted to you. Most likely she will flirt with you. Courtney Ryan is great! Just keep in mind her advice usually only works for average, to above average guys. If you are an old, fat, ugly, balding man, there are no flirting tips for you.
Speaking of flirting, could you react to a Craig Ferguson flirting compilation? I think your analysis on why his behavior works would be fascinating. Those compilations have been captivating a lot of men. Lol
Thanks, Courtney - even as a seasoned, slightly older man who knows how to flirt with girls, I found this video helpful. One question for you (and this is a tough one for me, honestly): I recently met a girl who works at a local grocery store nearby. I could tell by her body language and facial / other cues that she was interested, as well as the way she interacted with other customers relative to me. I talked to her yesterday when she was stocking shelves, but since she is working, she is the one who has more of the power to initiate contact (not normal in the male-female dynamic outside the business / service context). How do I progress things without it being too awkward? Was thinking of doing something like this (in the foreign language of the country I live) -- the next time we're chatting, I could say casually, "Hey - you seem pretty cool. I'm Jesse, by the way. Here's my number - shoot me a text if you wanna grab a drink sometime." That way, I'm keeping it brief, respecting her work environment and also eliminating the very awkward situation of asking for her number in a work situation, which would make her look potentially unprofessional. What do you think?! Thanks a lot dude -- love the videos, overall. -Jesse
You can do that, but honestly it's best to ask for her number. It's more confident and a better test of her attraction. Plus then you have the power to call her after, assuming you get it. If you put the ball into her court you are giving her the responsibility to call you. Women hate responsibility in the early dating stages. I would do this - acknowledge the awkwardness but go for the number ask anyway. "Look, I appreciate this is awkward but I find you interesting and I'd love to take you for a coffee/drink sometime. Please give me your number. It would be great to set something up." Words to that effect. If all she give you is a Snap/IG or whatever, take it. If she gets flustered then by all means give her YOUR number as a Hail Mary, but the best frame is the GUY ASKS THE GIRL FOR THE NUMBER.
@@jleano609 💯 this. You have to lead the interaction. Women do not want to be responsible for dating or sex. Smile, laugh, joke with her, and then ask for the number. Her mood matters a lot. 🙂
@@marcmays48 Again, respectfully disagree in this context. Your statements are true in general, but probably not in the particular context of a woman who is working (may not have her phone on her, and if her boss sees her with it could get fired). We have to be thoughtful and not dogmatic. But, yes - men should lead the interaction in most circumstances. Cheers.
@@jessejames88 I am not sure I follow what you're saying. Regardless of whether she has her phone on her, or not... she should know what her *own phone number* is. And there's no law which says you need to stand there and type it in in front of her while other customers are waiting. Just thank her, repeat the number several times to yourself in your mind, get outside, and then, add it to your contacts list. Call next day, and set up an in person date. Simple. Do anything else, and you look like you're playing games / not interested / begging for another dude to enter (or re-enter) her life.
One of my standbys is to chat up a lady with a book and ask about that book. Then I 1) am flirting with a reader and showing I am too; 2) show I can listen; 3) open a path to an easy response.
I’m 61 & have been with my GF for nearly a decade. For 15-20 years prior to landing her; I had a long; dry spell that included short term affairs & dates with non-compatible ladies. Today; I just be myself & have @ least 5-10 potential women that I’d have @ least a 70% shot at bagging. I suffered from extreme shyness in high school; college & a few years beyond. A knockout of a chick pursued me when I was about 24. We had a great thing for maybe 2 months & then she abruptly ghosted me. I was devastated! Eventually just saying the heck with it & trying to act not so desperate became a sure-fire method for me. First major tip: Practice saying “Hi” to different girls. If they brush you off; F-em!Some Will but many won’t & you’ll be on your way.
You have good points, here Courtney. I have problems with smiling because of a bout of Bell's Palsy on the l eft side of my face, so tge best I can do is a,right side smirk A sense of humor and a light tease is a must!
1) How can you smile with tour eyes? 2) What is a genuine compliment? 3) How to tease? - pls give 3 or 4 exaples of the above mentioned, so that I can understand.
The act natural advice is a real banger for real. There was a few girls i knew when i was younger who were very beautiful, and i just assumed out of my league, for all intents and purposes they were. Thing is it made me not give a damn about how i was around them, i was natural, even though nothing ever happened w them i realized later on it could have, it might not have gone anywhere, but if i tried something could have. Also trying to be to sexual to fast while trying to flirt hardly ever works. If shes kind of a "guy" girl and fucks w u back in a playful way, well thats just it, she had a lot of brothers or something and can hang, but trust me she dont want none.
I have communication problems with all genders. When someone is talking to me, I just listen to the things and react. But I don't expand the conversation into a deeper talk. The only except is my best friend whom I know for 18 years. We are having great conversations. It's just the emptiness off words, I'm currently suffering with. Listening to things people say is a struggle as well. I don't want to appear like a person who never listens but I drift away in my mind while they are talking because I'm analyzing the way they act etc. I'm thinking of the past this person must have had to tell me these informations and so on rather than adding something to the chat.
Do not do any of these unless you look like a handsome movie star. You'll be labeled a creep, probably get fired from your job and maybe even arrested.
FLIRT: /flert/ verb The process were males loose all humility in the process to gain sexual favor or acceptance from females. Without the knowledge that this sexual favor or acceptance is based solely on their physical appearance, ability to provide resources, and perceived social status. The absence of which could result in public humiliation, ridicule, and proclamation of sexual harassment. Reference : Hypergamy
My recommandation: get used to talk to as many strangers as possible (men and women) even if you're not interested. A lot of practice will help when you finally talk to people you're interested in. Take the habit to talk to some strangers every day while trying to be funny and kind.
Wonderful video My partnership of five years ended a month ago. When my true love decided to part ways with me, it truly is the only thing on my mind. I can't fathom my life with anyone else, and even though I've tried everything to get him back, it's all in vain. Despite my best efforts to put him out of my thoughts, I can't help but miss him and think about him all the time. I could not really tell you why I am saying this.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Interesting! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor, and how can I get in touch with him most effectively?
His name is Father Obah Eze, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
he is father obah eze, he has great powers, he can help you.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
1:01 Show up for youself
2:09 Natural approach
3:00 Make eye contact
4:08 Smile
4:50 Mirror her movements
5:24 Be a good listener
6:29 Give a complement
7:41 Humor/teasing
9:19 Don't be a SIMP
None of that will work if you don’t have a big bank account
@@johnnygalvan1344 they'll spend it on Gucci
@@johnnygalvan1344 Maybe you're not doing it right.
@@johnnygalvan1344 and that’s why you’re single
@@A.blue558 I was tied down for 10 years now im single and where I work is paradise for a single young hung man like myself:^) why pork one when you can pork them all . Now I get to try so many different flavors and loving it .
I feel confident in myself and what I bring to the table, but...so often I feel myself struggling to think of anything interesting, witty, funny, or flirty to say 😂 it's like my brain shuts halfway off. Especially if the girl is exceptionally pretty. Thank you Courtney!
Well there is nothing wrong with ending it early and leaving some mystery behind. That will give you both sometime to maybe think about something to talk about if not go over the previous encounter
Don’t put the p***y on a pedestal. Once you talk to enough women you begins to realize that what you see on the outside is of little importance.
i feel everyone experiences this but just understand it’s just another human being that is flawed.
@@ayyjayy2583 not everyone experiences it though. While I agree understanding they are just another person is important, it’s more important to be okay with an awkward silence, or a lack of reciprocity. You are not there to entertain her, you are communicating as equals. Sometimes just holding a gaze with a slight smirk is all it takes, not filling up every silence with more words
Hope this helps! Thanks for sharing this.
Learning to be charismatic around anyone and not just women definitely helps. If you can talk to any kind of person in any situation it makes being flirty a lot easier.
I think for a lot of men the issue is anxiety to even approach. Most people can pick up social cues and keep a conversation flowing, it's the fear of rejection that keeps many men from making connections. It's important to remind yourself that you are in your own head and nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Control your mind and approach a woman for what she is, another human being that is no better than you or I, and you deserve a chance at happiness just like anyone else
Well said
The problem is that you are assuming approaching women will lead to happiness, but that is not how that works.
@@mahadinkabir391 he didn’t say that stop projecting
@@maventry he implied it. What am I projecting?
One thing I tell guys along this line is "it's not like all the women who have ever said no to you meet in a place somewhere to discuss and blog about you -- they aren't a mob -- effectively they are one person." So it doesn't matter if twenty say no to you, any more than it matters when one says no to you. Move on. You are looking for the one who says "sure, let's have a drink together, see where it goes."
I was flirting with a girl last night at the gym I work at. Of course I was on the clock working the front desk but I noticed she seemed to be sitting watching me and in no apparent hurry to leave after my coworker left. We got talking and she was smiling and laughing a lot which made me reciprocate it. It felt so good because it's been so long since I've had that feeling. I was pretty nervous but I reached for the stars and told her I thought she was beautiful with a big smile on my face. I ended up getting her phone number so hopefully we keep talking!
Thanks again for another great video Courtney!
🙌🔥
You are a legend
In my experience it does not mean much if a girl gives you her number. I got many numbers when I was in that dating thing in my youth, but the phone numbers were either fake (on purpose - I always recalled the phone number to her to make sure that I did not mishear a digit) or they just didn't react to anything. Girls are driven by their emotions, they - in my experience - have no rational mind, so the one evening you have a good talk and fun with her and she acts like she likes you and then when you try to call her she is like a complete other person, like she never got to know you. Also most of them are notorious liars and manipulative as hell. If you give them any chance to do, they will screw you up. So, I got used to keep emotional distance to them, that's the best way to handle them. And when they start acting like a piece of sh*t, for example if they are bitching because of small things, I drop them. Also, because I know how women are (maybe there are exceptions, but if they exist I did not met any of them yet in my life) I will never mary one of them (this is just too risky for me as a guy and I can not get any real value out of it) and only will gets kids with one that I am sure will not be like the ones I met. Usually girls reveal their true nature after about 6 months, sometimes a lot earlier. If you for example, tell her (girl a - the "prospect" that seems to be interested in you), that you think this other girl b is hot and the other girl b suddenly avoids you, then you know that you immediately should drop girl a, as that means she tell bullshit about you in your absence. She will really bring a lot of trouble into your life and will not add any value to it. But you will experience such bullshit within the first 6 to 8 months since you started talking to them. If you did not notice such behaviour after 12 months you still should keep an eye open, but you probably have found one of the very rare unicorns that you should keep.
Great work. When you call her, her buying temperature may fall off a bit-- she's most likely in a different context. So you want to call back to some of the humor, experiences, etc. you had when you first met her.
From there, once she's back in a good mood, schedule an in person meetup, and then get off the phone when things are on a high note. 😉
@@marcmays48 That's some good advice, I'll remember that. Thanks!
Courtney, I just wanna say ever since I broke up with my last gf a little over a year now, your channel among others has helped me to find myself and reinvent myself. I’m still a work in progress but I’ve never felt better about myself. From fitness, to style and grooming to knowing how to better communicate and use positive body language. Just wanna say thank you!
*I love how you emphasize the importance of body language and genuine connection. Flirting should be fun, not stressful, and your advice really helps with that!*
I'm glad I came across this video. I've finally landed my dream career (or at least the first serious step of it) and am about to land my own place. I feel like I will be ready to start dating soon. This will be my first time dating since 2014.
Best of luck to you 👍🏻
knowing "who" you are and being 100% comfortable being authentic to your personal truth. Great vid Courtney, I love the content. great job.
WOW, really? Ok..OK... sure, 🤔 ❓️
Excellent Rundown and Explanations!! For me, internal confidence ( working on showing up for myself mentally and not being a simp like doing anything to get someone to like me) as well as eye contact are 2 key components I definitely still need to work on the most. Really appreciate your insight bc I want to grow and become more comfortable & mature about putting myself out there and enjoy my time when I’m out at social gatherings.
Successful flirting is a continuous balancing act between tension and easing tension; polarization and comfort provision; being socially calibrated and riding the razor's edge; showing her you're not afraid to push her buttons but you know how to do it with care and grace.
It's also exhausting and even guys who are masters will tap out eventually because it's simply ludicrous amounts of cajoling and effort.
No doubt, particularly for introverted and socially anxious people. For them, they already hate small-talk, but flirting is a small-talk binging hoedown. But unfortunately, it's a nessesary ritual that's part and parcel to the courting process in the mating and dating game.
Looks money dummy
I can't see women all that well do to my visual impairment, especially in the dark. But I have found a good tip for anyone in my situation is that a lovely voice for me goes a long way. I will often compliment a woman if she has a lovely voice. It always seems to make the day of whoever I'm telling this to.
I always like to set a frame that they’re annoying me. One girl I see at the gym regularly I will say something with a smile like, “oh no not you. What do you want?” It gets a laugh every time. Playful debates work great too
🙌🏼
You just can’t overplay it
That is good.
Of course they do. That’s why In person works better than dating apps because women often won’t show personality to work from and be playful. I have to find gyms you’re at. Gyms I go to women have headphones on and act like they don’t want to be bothered.
Yeah it is definitely important to pay attention to the environment because then it does give you an idea how to break the ice, or at least have the chance to get people laughing, even if that means talking to somebody else while getting the girl's attention, and if she gives multiple cues, like lots of eye contact, that is typically when you should go and at least introduce yourself. If you can be subtle and playful without being direct, sometimes that can be stimulating without being creepy or perverted and I know some guys struggle with how to ignite an ember or even feed the flame once it's already there
🙌🏼
Yep I'm one of those "struggling" guys... lol
I think prolonged eye contact shows you caught her attention too or reciprocal attention like I said
This shit is annoying. What environment at a bar that has stuff to talk about or funny? That’s why I don’t approach because you shouldn’t have to put the pressure of being funny right off the bat. If you’re trying to be funny you’ll usually come off as forced or not funny. That’s why workplace classroom or co Ed sports work well for me. Because you’re naturally talking with someone and in those convos you find funny things and quips. This stuff you write is funny, because it’s like “be funny” on the spot, so if that’s hard for a guy he’s less funny? But ironically when he’s in conversation naturally and comfortable he’s funnier than these guys who have these on the spot funny cues. Those same guys on cue funny things at first approach more often aren’t making women laugh and ppl constantly in general in every day situations. Some ppl just have to warm up but naturally funny guys can do it overall but might have to warm up first.
I think I heard this video at the right time because I feel that it's about time I start going back out and testing the waters. I'm 23, but fell out of the dating scene because I felt like I needed to improve myself, and not time to start dating yet. Now that I feel that I'm in the right place in my life. I just needed confidence, and this video really gave it to me. Thanks Courtney, you're the best! 😂
Bro similar situation here, manage good intentions and you will get good results - always keep learning
" going back out and testing the waters. I'm 23"
You sure SOUND 23. You should know what's going on these days. See the videos called "Why men stopped dating". Men are boycotting women and even the bars and gyms where women prey on men. And check out "Female dating strategy"
I think like dancing, good flirting requires both parties to be contributing to make it work. You can be an amazing flirt but if the girl is playing too hard to get it will totally kill the vibe.
I used to be considered a huge flirt in elementary school and highschool. It's quite difficult to do with a stranger that's more teasing/banter, I think flirting only happens when you already have some rapport.
I stay home. It's cheaper
I have to say this Courtney! You are the best speaker I've seen who shares a woman's perspective so amazingly! Love the content you create! Keep creating Ma'am!⭐
1, Be wealthy
2. Be top 20% in physical attractiveness
3. Be famous
4-9. Posses unflinching confidence that cannot be undermined by any number of rejections or bad experiences so you can be called cocky and arrogant.
Ok how are there so many men that fit none of these in good relationships?
@@MrCjchamp I havent observed that....
switch number 1 and 2
Real women look for shyness.
Number 4 was have a poppin blue-checked IG with 100k followers. Being wealthy was top because you can buy the other things.
If you are attractive, it is called flirting. If you are ugly, it is called harassment.
Even a handsome guy can creep out a woman he attempts flirtation with if he's socially awkward. I was that guy at 21. Several people told me I looked very good and those who didnt know me, assumed i either had a wife or gf. I was lonely. I was very shy. I couldnt spot a hint to save my life. And yes, I even creeped out some women by accident.
Being a very good looking as a guy, is absolutely zero shield against being rejected by women, even embarassingly so.
I absolutely hate that famous meme of the handsome office guy vs the fat nerdy guy complimenting a workplace woman.
@@johnmarks714 I wish you luck
@@johnmarks714 While I have had the same experience as you, please try to imagine the same situation except she starts off as not having any interest. You can easily lose her interest, but when you're handsome it's your chance to lose. You don't have to create a chance from scratch
@@SoundsSilver There were plenty of women who weren't interested at all.
I've thought about this quite a bit. I'd put it just a little bit differently. If a a woman likes you she will laugh at pretty much anything you say (to reassure you that she is interested , maybe not decided yet, but interested).
If you are ugly,, shy or whatever. Then I suggest waiting. I'm not a qualified counsellor or anything so see if others agree: -Wait for her to make the first move. She knows how you feel; most women can 'read' most men. Women can't 'read' the flattering charming cheats liars and skunks of course, Nut normal guys pose little problem. If she thinks there's something between you; she won't let the opportunity pass. And if she weakens her friends will embolden her. And when you get the full treatment - eyes, smile, proximity etc - your self consciousness will vanish and you can do your stuff. - flirting and on
Just try not go though the ceiling when she does. Stay cool
good luck
Another thing you might add / comment on with respect to meeting girls -- it's about 3 key factors a lot of guys get wrong, one of which you mention here: context, energy and timing. All 3 are key for a man who has "game" in flirting with women (I hate that word, but it's the only one that captures the idea of skill at meeting women). Context = environment, as you point out here; energy is down to the physical energy she is giving off, esp. when interacting with us as a man, and it's also a relative marker (vis-a-vis other people); and timing = making sure you approach her at the right moment (I see a lot of guys - even with a bartender who might like them - bothering her while she is serving someone else, etc.). This is annoying and not cool, and choosing the wrong moment to approach can make an otherwise skilled man look lame and slightly desperate. Timing does matter b/c it shows thoughtfulness and maximises your chance of a favourable response. Anyway, just a few ideas I wanted to contribute, which I have used myself and helped other guys with over the years. Cheers.
Great points. Thanks for sharing them. 👍
Guys, it all boils down to one thing. Be handsome. Always be handsome. Glad i could help.
Pretty privilege is very powerful.
@@thelarry383 and real
Whew. Glad I've got that part taken care of.
@@Macheako I don’t know. I see lots of unattractive ppl in relationships
If you think it's all about being handsome, you're wrong. Confidence is everything and how you carry yourself.
Love the multiple perspectives. Strong women with different views, some overlap in paradigms but really fantastic individuals that are unique. Great work. You are providing amazing insights and your production values rock! Don’t stop.
I found that doing everything simply as you said doing it works. Be confident and be comfortable 👏
Love your approach on this video, while yes what you’re stating is important and applicable. Your subtle jokes make this video. So funny 😂
Lol! Thank you so much 😂
I've always been a good flirt! It's moving past the flirtatious stage, that I have my issues!!
While I agree with all the points, the biggest issue for most people is that flirting is very similar to athletic or musical performance: the best performances are when you're in the zone or what science calls the flow state. And the only way to achieve that is the same way the best athletes and musicians get there: practice, practice, practice! You get better at everything you practice a lot, and ironically the harder you try when putting pressure on yourself to succeed, often the worse you will fail. Just put yourself out there and don't take it too seriously. You got this. 😊
Hey halfwit… how does a man practice flirting when he’s constantly given the cold shoulder?
Yep. Plus humor comes when in a zone too or flow
good point it;s tough when you have high expectations tho. You know you're very funny and charming, but that comes out when youre comfortable. So a matter of being comfortable with an initial conversation
My best pickup line: Hi. I'm Scott. What's your name?
Seriously. This has worked for me. I mean....it doesn't have to be some Shakespearian Sonnet or the One Liner of Heaven Itself. I think my best advice is to quiet your expectations. Don't expect...just flow. You fear because you desire. Lessen desire, and you lessen anxiety. And you get more of the interaction you wanted. Be ready to accept anything, even rejection, with equal satisfaction. If she rejects you, at least she didn't waste your time.
Love the tip to go for the natural approach. Thanks, Courtney!
Men, confidence is simple. Build credibility with yourself through repeated action, not necessarily results. A strong self image translates into more than just words spoken, it affects pitch, body language and the look in your eyes.
Understand outcome independence. Enter the conversation for the sake of the conversation, not a desired result. Speak to women as if you already know them, speak to them just as casually as you would speak to your bro. Don’t aim to prove anything. Let your lifestyle and the way you carry yourself speak for itself.
Do not compromise your principles to appear agreeable, communicate with honor, respect and honesty, and confidence will no longer matter. Women love a man who is secure with himself.
My upload schedule begins tomorrow, hope you see you there.
@A walrus compare how you play a video game you really like VS how you try to approach women. In both cases you want to do well, but the motivations are very different.
If you keep losing at the video game, my guess is that while u may be frustrated, your self esteem doesnt hit the toilet. You either keep trying, look up some walkthroughs or even move on to something else. Takeaway: you dont take it personally.
If you however get rejected especially by a pretty woman, I'm guessing your whole self image goes to hell. You feel like shit and obsess. Takeaway: you took it very seriously, as an indictment against your self worth.
Sucker ass noise:
@@johnmarks714 it also sucks if you haven't gotten laid in a while and patience has to be there or else a man will look desperate but it can be hard to not want outcomes to go well. Because a man would hope things go well sooner than later. The longer it is, the longer the dry spell
@@miamiman24 it is what it is. If necessary, save up money for a trip to Tijuana, Mexico OR Thailand etc. In those places, prostitution is legal. Get it out of your system.
@@johnmarks714 that won’t help if that desire is ego based too. If you feel you’re attractive it will be hard to not have high expectations of doing well. If things don’t go well it can be frustrating and almost feel confusing. Plus I don’t know why a self respected man would be satisfied getting with a hooker. It’s like a talented bowler using bunker lanes when bowling. Leave that for the average birds who suck at bowling. Plus if a man wants to not waste time sowing oats. Would suck for time going by and oats not sowed so he can be content put it in the past then be ready for a relationship. But instead things drag on longer than expected based on the man’s wit, charm humor and strong traits. So meets a woman that’s great but not satisfied with his love life prior so can’t and will not commit. That would suck and add more regrets. So the sooner things work out the better but yeah it’s good to not have a time frame or place expectations. But it’s hard when you feel you have a high ceiling in such regard.
banter and being sarcastic works for me
🙌🏼
Don't want to be too forward or too subtle.
By definition, flirting is a way to show interest.
Flirting should be fun.
1. Show up for yourself
-Make a good first impression
-Dress well, groom well, hygiene
2. Go for natural approach
-use your surroundings to inspiring conversation
-THEN if going well, introduce yourself
-be able to read and see if she's flirting back
3. Make eye contact
-look away regularly
-be playful with eye contact
-don't stare/stalk
-if she smiles, it's a good sign
4. SMILE
-look warm and approachable
-playful looks and smirks
5. Mirror her movement
-see if she mirrors yours too
6. Be a good listener
-can't flirt if you don't listen
-keeps the conversation going
-ask open ended questions
7. Give a compliment
-genuine, honest
-I had to come over and tell you I like your style
-nothing about her physical attributes
-no pick up lines
8. Humor and Teasing
-puts her at ease
-be playful when appropriate (read the room)
-inside jokes really work well
9. Don't be a SIMP
-you just met, no need to put her on a pedestal
-know when to walk away when it's going nowhere
Very useful and insightful video Courtney. Good work ! Joey Tribianni's flirtatious "How you doin'?" was admittedly hilarious on Friends. But in real life, you are giving very sound advice when you suggest dropping the pre-meditated pick up lines -- to be more real and authentic in a way that can make someone feel that your attraction is unique to them in particular (and not a cheesy, pre-meditated and rehearsed pick-up-line-ploy).
oh thank god finally legit advice. i'm shy and a lot of girls are shy to and it doesn't even get very far most of the time
Another one I would add, if you’re out socially and alcohol is involved, make sure you don’t drink too much. Make sure you are fully in control. Flirting after one drink is easy, many more and you won’t come across well!
One thing I’ve always noticed that works well in a party/bar scenario is to end the initial conversation after a few minutes of talking and then follow up later
These are all great but I just wanted to make one note. Your style might not necessarily line with hers. Dress for success should be with dressing for success with your own style. It should make you feel confident. Personally I've had way more success in dating when I dress how I want to dress and not how other people tell me to. Always have amazing hygiene but have your own style that makes you feel confident in yourself. You'll attract the person you actually want to be with long term.
From my experience, even trying out all of these tips & tricks doesn’t guarantee that a man won’t end up being friendzoned. Humour/playfulness/teasing can also be seen as a mere friendly gestures by a woman. I have come to believe that there’s more to eye contact, smile, & physical touch - the way it is done - which helps to convey sexual attraction/true intention clearly. It would help if you can delve deeply into the right & flirty way to make eye contact, smile, and touch.
CR: "Flirting should be fun. It shouldn't be something that stresses you out or that you dread." Also CR: "First impressions are crucial for initial interactions and attraction...making sure to present the best you...is very important." 😑
Both of the statements can be true at the same time, it’s up to you to make it so.
@@cuongbui9708 of course they can both be true, that's not beyond possibility, esp if you're in the right headspace and given your experience level. But, what's more likely? It's sort of like saying you can have fun at an interview at a highly sought after job. Sure you can be cool and collected and make light of it, which would probably be better for you ultimately, but that's easier said than done, esp from the outside looking in. To easily expect/suggest that of someone in the situation isn't realistic, bc that situation is naturally and understandably stress inducing.
I once told her that her voice so soothing and addictive that I don't need to drink this night 😁 .
Never ask a fish how to get caught
@@quiteshayne00You act as though women do not want intimacy, love and connection. Lmao.
Courtney's demeanor is everything!
Question: I was told strong eye contact is essential. I was also told that looking away first as a man shows weakness. I was also told that not looking away first is creepy behavior that scares women. So which is it?
I'll let you in on a little trick, when you start talking look at her left eye then slowly move your gaze to her lips and then to the right eye. Don't know why but this works. Second remember that your trying to flirt and not train a dog, have fun don't worry about showing weakness.
@@szymonpinkowski1636 Thank you!
I think one great tip to make it easier to flirt is to find the right "setting"... you want to be in a comfortable situation, and in a "good mood" and you can actually tweak your mood by doing some sport or listening to some good music and you can try to find the best activities where to be flirty. Also speaking about what is going in your mind and making fun of yourself is always a good start that makes you look confident even to joke about yourself
This is extremely important, hey Courtney this video is great. I usually need tips on how to improve ways to connect with woman in different places, single guy still waiting for the big thing to happen in my life. God knows this and probably hasn't happened yet because the wait may be awhile yet but always looking to improve my attraction to the opposite sex. Really informative and hopefully on the rise like he should be 🔝🔴🌞🤴⛪
thanks courtney,you have a good channel and are a graceful and stylish speaker
Being myself usually works. I just go with the flow and enjoy the time spent when communicating. Don’t try to force anything but take one step at a time and allow her to enjoy her time in the conversation.
The best advice I’ve ever heard is adopting the mindset of “flirting with the world”. If you can be charismatic in as many settings as possible, you won’t have to turn it on - you’ll always be on!
The playful tease is my bread and butter. Like Corey Wayne some what said ‘treat her like a bratty little sister’. It’s also a good way to see if they are confident in themselves.
Women love this! So true!
Flirting is most effective when you are interested. It may help the structured individual to tell yourself, "I am ready to meet someone and have fun with someone. When I see someone I am interested in, it is ok to be PLAYFUL and follow Courtney Ryan's advice." Please don't force the flirtation.
This is exactly what I did for the 4th of July. I was with 3 girls (one is a best friend seeing someone) but the other 2 were fair game lol
Hahaha how did it go??
@@CourtneyRyan well, one of them was quite receptive lol too bad she's leaving the states at the end of the month
@@tommygunn6901 You guys meet girls wow
@@RaZoR7i7 LOL. IKR?
@@tommygunn6901 get it in before she dips 😵💫
Flirting is an art form
Get creative and just have fun with it
Don’t try too hard just keep it cool comfortable and casual
Expect nothing out of it - let her chase you if she’s interested
It’s all done ad lib, on the spot, in the moment, not a single thing preplanned 😄
Done 👉🏼
What sucks is that Courtney makes it sound so easy to flirt and get a woman interested in u but honestly it’s one of the most strategic things u will ever do in your life. It’s like studying The Art of War but for dating. U have to have a worst case and best case scenario in your mind so that u know how to recover or flourish properly. Also know what to say and what not to say as well as your actions. People say dating is fun and from my personal experience, it’s not. And also, if your looks are not good enough for a woman, height, or d size, you’re already at a major disadvantage. Most modern women will make u chase them because they never make it easy for us men to even try and pursue them nowadays. They test us or play hard to get and personally, I don’t got time for that BS. It’s sad that most modern women think like this but it is what it is.
I take your methods authentic because you know more than any man teaching flirting here ..
I feel like these are really just tips for how to appear confident, but I didn't get much from this in terms of how to FLIRT. I know how to project confidence in general, but I struggle with moving conversation from friendly to flirty. That's what I was hoping to get out of this.
Flirting is a ton of fun, even when there's no other goal than having fun. One could easily replace "flirting" with "joking around." And of course if flirting leads to something more, great. But flirting can and should be stress-free.
Remember to prioritize this, fellas: Looks, Game, Money
I would add to spark interest and build connection. Later on which transforms into desire.
Great video like many other!
Important: don’t be an idiot who tries to do all of these at once. Trying makes it unnatural. Bringing out the ones you can is what you want. If you’re coming significantly short on something, maybe think about why that is and what you can do about that in stead of forcing doing it anyway.
You don’t just DO confidence. Fake it ‘till you make it doesn’t mean you’re faking it well. Courtney gave the good tip of dressing well, which coincidentally worked for me.
Same goes for things like eye contact and all. Some of these you can learn by trying, but not by juggling all the others at the same time. And just imagine trying to fake a sense of humour… Just don’t. Find confidence for your own sake and go from there.
I’d suggest just starting with dressing a way that makes you feel confident, that will make most of these come naturally.
It really does work.
Also,
Compliments is also an important yet easy one, but try and just learn to give platonic compliments to people before you go awkwardly telling women, “Y- you’re really hot, you know that.” Just start with learning to notice, “oh hi mom! Your hair looks nice today.” That way you know how to make sincere compliments and don’t even give Away too obviously that you’re TRYING to flirt when you do. If you say it just to flirt, it’s much harder for it not to end up coming out awkward. Hair is an easy one. If someone, even men, have a haircut that looks nice that day, say it, just to make them happy.
Who knows, you might even get some attention without even trying to. I have. Sincere compliments work, and sincerity comes over far more confidently than just being brave enough to force out a compliment.
Hello, Ms. Courtney. Long time no see. Another thing I want to add to the list is show interest to keep the conversation going.
Courtney, when you give men advice, which age group of women are you referring to? I think 20's 30's and 40's women have a different level of maturity level.
Ask any older person, not just a woman, how old they feel inside, and it will almost always be in their 20’s. What you are calling “maturity” is really just more life experiences, not maturity level.
The principles to talk to women do not change based on age, the only thing that might change is one’s vernacular, as younger people (not just women) speak differently than older people. But, again the principles don’t change at all.
She is talking about girls, who hit the wall. They are ready to flirt. Usually its after 30.
@@causalitymastered While statistically that is true, I'll bet anytime on a 35yrs old fit girl vs a 25yrs obese girl who gorges on junk and doesn't exercise. Moreover, raising a baby requires mental fortitude...does a 20yrs old have it? And do you have enough to compensate for her?
@@makingmodernmen8843 dude everyone matures. Nobody is the same in their 30s and 40s as they were in their 20’s. Where do you hear this shit? Are you the same?
Girl asked me to go out after work as a group for some drinks , I said "I don't know I am pretty busy " she said "Oh good answer" act like your time is of value and they will be lucky to share time with you. I did go in the end and I have a pretty long last name so I like to ask people where they think my name is from, always a good one .
When a girl asks you out, you don’t need to play that game. She already likes you
I can't believe you said that about the skirt. I use that all the time. "I like your skirt. I have the same one at home but didn't want to shave my legs." 😂
😂😂😂😂
Be the best version of yourself.
Great tips! “Confidence” is probably the #1 thing you’ll need before you approach any woman…
And have no agenda, just relax, and talk to her like a human being - because women are people, whether you choose to believe that, or not! Lol
But seriously, behave around her like you would with your friends, that way - she’ll let her guard down, and perhaps, let you get to know her!
Just remember, it’s your job to put her mind at ease, if you can do that - amazing things will start to happen!
Anyway, that’s my two cents.
-Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
You always have great advice! Thanks Carlos! 🙌🏼
@@CourtneyRyan no problem! My pleasure. Thank you as well. 😁❤️
We are all people. Celebrities and professional athletes are people, but fans worship them as if they are gods. And the media just further proves this.
Never trust a Dating Coach.
Dude you’re the shit. Idk how, but you understand awkward dudes
Men:
1. Be literally perfect
Women:
1. Exist
Why do men alway put women in some weird pedestal and then complain women being on that same pedestal they themselves put us? Like could you just once treat us like normal human beings that we are?
Great video, You make it so sound easy for us to master the art of Flirting. Like most everything, Practice makes Perfect!
Practice, Practice, Practice!
As I am a shy person it is very difficult for me to approach and flirt with women.I cannot do that in my lifetime.
You can do it!!
@@CourtneyRyan Actually I feel very anxious approaching women. What they will think about it.
@@venia..4529 I do not like these things so please do not post such things.
I know how you feel. I am the same way. I can't approach women and be flirty with then, either due to my shyness. Or maybe it's out of the fear of being rejected.
Do you gym brother? Highly recommend doing heavy compounds will get your t levels flowing through the roof. That surge of t will give you the confidence
Step 0: Be attractive. This is the most important step fellas. If you are a 1-4 caliber guy flirting, no matter how perfect you are at it will not work. You'll just be seen as creepy. If you are a 5-8, these tips can work. Of you are a 9-10 Chad, it doesn't matter what you say it do, a woman will be attracted to you. Most likely she will flirt with you.
Courtney Ryan is great! Just keep in mind her advice usually only works for average, to above average guys. If you are an old, fat, ugly, balding man, there are no flirting tips for you.
Speaking of flirting, could you react to a Craig Ferguson flirting compilation?
I think your analysis on why his behavior works would be fascinating. Those compilations have been captivating a lot of men. Lol
Builds energy and connection
Thanks, Courtney - even as a seasoned, slightly older man who knows how to flirt with girls, I found this video helpful. One question for you (and this is a tough one for me, honestly): I recently met a girl who works at a local grocery store nearby. I could tell by her body language and facial / other cues that she was interested, as well as the way she interacted with other customers relative to me. I talked to her yesterday when she was stocking shelves, but since she is working, she is the one who has more of the power to initiate contact (not normal in the male-female dynamic outside the business / service context). How do I progress things without it being too awkward? Was thinking of doing something like this (in the foreign language of the country I live) -- the next time we're chatting, I could say casually, "Hey - you seem pretty cool. I'm Jesse, by the way. Here's my number - shoot me a text if you wanna grab a drink sometime." That way, I'm keeping it brief, respecting her work environment and also eliminating the very awkward situation of asking for her number in a work situation, which would make her look potentially unprofessional. What do you think?! Thanks a lot dude -- love the videos, overall. -Jesse
You can do that, but honestly it's best to ask for her number. It's more confident and a better test of her attraction. Plus then you have the power to call her after, assuming you get it. If you put the ball into her court you are giving her the responsibility to call you. Women hate responsibility in the early dating stages.
I would do this - acknowledge the awkwardness but go for the number ask anyway. "Look, I appreciate this is awkward but I find you interesting and I'd love to take you for a coffee/drink sometime. Please give me your number. It would be great to set something up." Words to that effect. If all she give you is a Snap/IG or whatever, take it. If she gets flustered then by all means give her YOUR number as a Hail Mary, but the best frame is the GUY ASKS THE GIRL FOR THE NUMBER.
@@jleano609 💯 this. You have to lead the interaction. Women do not want to be responsible for dating or sex. Smile, laugh, joke with her, and then ask for the number. Her mood matters a lot. 🙂
@@jleano609 Respectfully disagree here. But thanks for your comment - will think on it further...but not too much ;-) Cheers.
@@marcmays48 Again, respectfully disagree in this context. Your statements are true in general, but probably not in the particular context of a woman who is working (may not have her phone on her, and if her boss sees her with it could get fired). We have to be thoughtful and not dogmatic. But, yes - men should lead the interaction in most circumstances. Cheers.
@@jessejames88 I am not sure I follow what you're saying. Regardless of whether she has her phone on her, or not... she should know what her *own phone number* is. And there's no law which says you need to stand there and type it in in front of her while other customers are waiting.
Just thank her, repeat the number several times to yourself in your mind, get outside, and then, add it to your contacts list. Call next day, and set up an in person date. Simple.
Do anything else, and you look like you're playing games / not interested / begging for another dude to enter (or re-enter) her life.
Congrats on getting the ring. You do great content with Alex and Nittin from playing with fire. Would love to see more content with them!
I think Im inlove with Courtney🖤😭love your videos!
Thank you for being here! ❤️
You always look so nice in your videos you always take your time to make yourself look nice
Courtney!!! Thank You very much... This is the one I needed... Congratulations...
Happy to help!
One of my standbys is to chat up a lady with a book and ask about that book. Then I 1) am flirting with a reader and showing I am too; 2) show I can listen; 3) open a path to an easy response.
A whole video on how to avoid being creepy would be cool.
Be good looking
Agreed girls just think guys are creepy if they don’t think the guy is hot
I’m 61 & have been with my GF for nearly a decade. For 15-20 years prior to landing her; I had a long; dry spell that included short term affairs & dates with non-compatible ladies. Today; I just be myself & have @ least 5-10 potential women that I’d have @ least a 70% shot at bagging. I suffered from extreme shyness in high school; college & a few years beyond. A knockout of a chick pursued me when I was about 24. We had a great thing for maybe 2 months & then she abruptly ghosted me. I was devastated! Eventually just saying the heck with it & trying to act not so desperate became a sure-fire method for me. First major tip: Practice saying “Hi” to different girls. If they brush you off; F-em!Some Will but many won’t & you’ll be on your way.
Happy Wednesday Courtney lookin classy as always girl 🌹❤
Thank you Luis! ❤️
I like your advice. It's very honest and straight forward! Thank you!
Great as always!
Thank you so much! ❤️
Thank you. This is quite helpful. You got me thinking and that’s a good thing.
Awesome content 👏 thanks again 👍
I like the way you say "I'm Courtney Ryan" at the start of your videos.
Hey Courtney, could you please react to Melli Monaco "10 Irresistible traits I find in Men"?
I will check it out!
You have good points, here Courtney.
I have problems with smiling because of a bout of Bell's Palsy on the l eft side of my face, so tge best I can do is a,right side smirk
A sense of humor and a light tease is a must!
great videos Courtney.
Thank you so much! ❤️
1) How can you smile with tour eyes?
2) What is a genuine compliment?
3) How to tease?
- pls give 3 or 4 exaples of the above mentioned, so that I can understand.
(Removes telling women their butts are juicy from my repertoire) The more you know.
😂
Pickup lines based on Sir-Mix-A-Lot will always be classics. ... "I like big butts, and I cannot lie..." 😊😉
The act natural advice is a real banger for real. There was a few girls i knew when i was younger who were very beautiful, and i just assumed out of my league, for all intents and purposes they were. Thing is it made me not give a damn about how i was around them, i was natural, even though nothing ever happened w them i realized later on it could have, it might not have gone anywhere, but if i tried something could have. Also trying to be to sexual to fast while trying to flirt hardly ever works. If shes kind of a "guy" girl and fucks w u back in a playful way, well thats just it, she had a lot of brothers or something and can hang, but trust me she dont want none.
Oh man this is hook me up on midnight
I have communication problems with all genders.
When someone is talking to me, I just listen to the things and react. But I don't expand the conversation into a deeper talk.
The only except is my best friend whom I know for 18 years. We are having great conversations.
It's just the emptiness off words, I'm currently suffering with.
Listening to things people say is a struggle as well. I don't want to appear like a person who never listens but I drift away in my mind while they are talking because I'm analyzing the way they act etc. I'm thinking of the past this person must have had to tell me these informations and so on rather than adding something to the chat.
My life is kinda sad
Teddy is blessed to have Courtney. Smart and gorgeous! Total package.
Courtney Courtney Courtney ❤️❤️❤️I thank you SO SO Much😃Again because of you, as a Black Man am not afraid to talk to White women anymore❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Do not do any of these unless you look like a handsome movie star. You'll be labeled a creep, probably get fired from your job and maybe even arrested.
FLIRT: /flert/ verb The process were males loose all humility in the process to gain sexual favor or acceptance from females. Without the knowledge that this sexual favor or acceptance is based solely on their physical appearance, ability to provide resources, and perceived social status. The absence of which could result in public humiliation, ridicule, and proclamation of sexual harassment. Reference : Hypergamy
My recommandation: get used to talk to as many strangers as possible (men and women) even if you're not interested. A lot of practice will help when you finally talk to people you're interested in. Take the habit to talk to some strangers every day while trying to be funny and kind.
If you are good looking you will flirt, if not you will be a creepy
Exactly
GS - You mean the difference between flirting and sexual harassment.
i love your positive energy thank you