Strange things rich old men do with their money

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ก.ย. 2024
  • I was inspired by the hilarious video @Sam O'Nella Academy did on Timothy Dexter ( • Timothy Dexter: The Du... ) and so created my own version of the story.
    No matter how unbelievable this story gets, remember, it's true!
    Time Stamp:
    #1 -- "Timothy Dexter" -- 0:37 -- The most absurd rags to riches story ever...
    Bloopers -- 14:14
    Check out the rest of this Historical Legends series 👇
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    For entertainment purposes only. Based on actual events.
    Thumbnail + final edits by Wes Adams:
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    Theme Song: "Something Wicked" - www.youtube.co....
    ('Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License')
    Theme Song by: ‪@RossBugden‬
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    #history #funny #mrballen
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    Nothing to see down here...
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    Seriously, no need to keep scrolling.
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    You are at the end. Nothing more exists beyond this. Promise.
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    What are you looking for? There is nothing else here.
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    OK, we lied, there's more....
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    ☠︎ Found the secret easter egg in today's video? Be the 1st to comment what it is and where it occurs in the video, and you will get pinned!! ☠︎

ความคิดเห็น • 13K

  • @UgherzCookies
    @UgherzCookies 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2112

    1:08 those car dealer ship men at the bottom of the screen.

    • @DogTown90291
      @DogTown90291 3 ปีที่แล้ว +127

      I don’t see it ! ????

    • @UgherzCookies
      @UgherzCookies 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      @@DogTown90291 next to his right arm on the bottom of the screen.

    • @WompWomp10190
      @WompWomp10190 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      I could not find it but then I looked closely and saw it good eye

    • @UgherzCookies
      @UgherzCookies 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@WompWomp10190 thanks

    • @ASP312Productions
      @ASP312Productions 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      How did you see that

  • @negativesanchez
    @negativesanchez 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8056

    Timothy: "such a tragedy that my wife passed away."
    Elizabeth: "stop telling people im dead."
    Timothy: "sometimes I can still hear her voice."

    • @kevincurpheymusic
      @kevincurpheymusic 3 ปีที่แล้ว +108

      LOL LO LOL

    • @tamaraw1774
      @tamaraw1774 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Lullz

    • @XXathleticsXY
      @XXathleticsXY 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      Best comment

    • @immortalfae13
      @immortalfae13 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      LOL!!!

    • @sarahoshea9603
      @sarahoshea9603 3 ปีที่แล้ว +225

      Maybe he just had a great sense of humor and nobody understood it because he was too ahead of his time.

  • @theworldwillhelpus1187
    @theworldwillhelpus1187 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3785

    This man even made it on Mr ballen without anything tragic happening to him HIS LUCK IS EPIC

    • @bentonrp
      @bentonrp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +83

      Ahahaha! 🤣 Now you're telling me things about this guy that are actually scaring me! How can someone be this fortunate?

    • @seleuf
      @seleuf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      his wife tho

    • @Aden288
      @Aden288 3 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      @@seleuf Truly ghosted.

    • @youto826
      @youto826 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Oh man thats true honestly insane he didnt even come close to death like that

    • @MrLopez863
      @MrLopez863 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol

  • @kf7721
    @kf7721 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3267

    It's nice to hear a story once in awhile where the main character doesn't get stuck in a cave and suffocate or drown. And that it worked out for the cats.

    • @xeddtech
      @xeddtech 3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

      They got a bunch of free meals, and got to bask in beautiful Asiatic sunshine. Indeed. Everyone was a winner.. Except for those nobles.

    • @bt7594
      @bt7594 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      @@xeddtech and the rats lol

    • @wendys390
      @wendys390 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      I have to wonder what THAT journey was like. I have enough of a time getting mine to a vet.

    • @ryanicosworld
      @ryanicosworld 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      Please make more non horror stories please. You are so versatile with your story telling talent.

    • @13oct1992
      @13oct1992 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Best comment

  • @Mikej1592
    @Mikej1592 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +472

    wow Timothy is like the real life version of someone that puts all their skill points into luck. Seriously how lucky can someone get, that is insane.

    • @bd12544
      @bd12544 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Yeah, it’s like he’s white and male or something.

    • @moralityisnotsubjective5
      @moralityisnotsubjective5 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +37

      @@bd12544 😐🙄

    • @Orphioux
      @Orphioux 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​@@bd12544Oh yeah it's so good, I went into the bank the other day and they said my account was empty but I really needed to buy some food because I was so hungry, luckily the bank teller noticed I was white and just started handing me hundred dollar bills, there were too many to count! Dickhead.

    • @napalmballwipes
      @napalmballwipes 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Dude I've heard my grandpa say sending coal to Newcastle whenever I asked something dumb because his dad said it or something and this guy happened to send it the same week a complete strike happened which was such a short period the saying was still used after

    • @cranexdragon1046
      @cranexdragon1046 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@bd12544someone needs to go get lost

  • @DarkNight-zo5ci
    @DarkNight-zo5ci ปีที่แล้ว +1310

    I love how everyone banded together to defeat Timmy but his ignorance prevailed every time.

    • @TheMomseloc
      @TheMomseloc ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Kinda like Twitter, huh?

    • @joesands8860
      @joesands8860 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      Why doesn't my ignorance ever work out in my favor?
      Once, just once is all I ask.

    • @miapdx503
      @miapdx503 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      That willful ignorance...🙈🙉🙊

    • @malumkishin8608
      @malumkishin8608 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

      Bro you know that everyone was pissed,like you do all this and every time you try to ruin this man he wins.....knowing how things were back then I'm surprised people weren't thinking this man was being blessed by God or something cause holy hell.

    • @youniverse6841
      @youniverse6841 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      😂 It's sad but so funny the way you put it!

  • @ZNA_Productions
    @ZNA_Productions 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8556

    That punctuation thing at the end was actually a total boss move hahaha. What a gamer.

    • @crowmedicine3890
      @crowmedicine3890 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      Hilarious! I'm dying

    • @JackG79
      @JackG79 3 ปีที่แล้ว +107

      I agree... that was actually pretty fucking awesome!!

    • @thereliablyuncoolguy8082
      @thereliablyuncoolguy8082 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Are you still suffering from small poc?

    • @MissSeaSea
      @MissSeaSea 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      I was like EPICCCC

    • @nelsonx5326
      @nelsonx5326 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      And he invented 'stream of consciousness writing' nearly 200 years before Jack Kerouac.

  • @apacifistmachinegunner669
    @apacifistmachinegunner669 3 ปีที่แล้ว +919

    “ Timothy decided he didn’t really like his wife anymore.”
    🤣

    • @NoName-fm2cy
      @NoName-fm2cy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Fucking beats her... no sh!t hahaha

    • @MadMan_123
      @MadMan_123 3 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      Wait didnt she originally make him rich😂😂😂😂😂

    • @stevemorris2364
      @stevemorris2364 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      I wonder if he realized that before or after the cane beating

    • @HaveAGoodDayFk.U
      @HaveAGoodDayFk.U 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My name must be timothy.lol

    • @tommytaylor2084
      @tommytaylor2084 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Relatable 😂

  • @Stoy981
    @Stoy981 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +95

    Done well, Timothy Dexter’s story would make a fantastic movie.

  • @slugcult1973
    @slugcult1973 3 ปีที่แล้ว +506

    The most incredible thing about this whole story is the fact that back then, you could sell an old suit of yours, and make enough money to actually relocate to a whole other town.

    • @arknark
      @arknark 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Pretty wild to think about indeed.

    • @vanessashaw3594
      @vanessashaw3594 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      😂
      Even if we could do that now we can't go anywhere. 🤣😪

    • @kovukinttv8650
      @kovukinttv8650 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Well he did say he worked at a leather place making good money..so maybe he custom tailored something with really valuable cloths and craftsmanship.

    • @ovationsensation
      @ovationsensation 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I thought the same thing, lol.

    • @nataliehewitt7172
      @nataliehewitt7172 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Just had the same thought. Imagine being able to relocate by selling your best suit.

  • @LocsNdimples
    @LocsNdimples 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1429

    He truly lived a life of “ignorance is bliss”.

    • @JohnDoe-eo1op
      @JohnDoe-eo1op ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I like to imagine God had his back, like thats what happens when you're spiteful to people know? HAHA

    • @miapdx503
      @miapdx503 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes, that "willful ignorance." When your ignorance is a choice...🙊🙉🙈

    • @NathalieGrows
      @NathalieGrows 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      @@JohnDoe-eo1opyessss I believe so I think God had his back because people were cruel and tried to take advantage of him and he got paid back ten or a hundred times

    • @michaeldoran4367
      @michaeldoran4367 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      MASSIVELY GIRTHY KOK SEEN POKING THROUGH A TOWEL AT THE COMMUNITY POOL. THE KOK LOOKS LIKE AN ENORMOUS SNAKE WRIGGLING AROUND IN THE AMAZON JUNGLE. SPECTACULARLY HUGE GIRTHY VEINY ERECT KOK

    • @michaeldoran4367
      @michaeldoran4367 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Timothy sounds like he is about average intelligence for 2024

  • @Jaketheaxman
    @Jaketheaxman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1911

    This guy literally profited off of people who criticized him. What a Goddamn badass

    • @fe.bonetti1537
      @fe.bonetti1537 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Literally my goal in life

    • @oppboyputt
      @oppboyputt 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Fact

    • @UgherzCookies
      @UgherzCookies 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Who criticized him?

    • @Dravianpn02
      @Dravianpn02 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@UgherzCookies David Paulides

    • @marcopolo2418
      @marcopolo2418 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      How? What? Lol

  • @OnnenkeksiYT
    @OnnenkeksiYT 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +173

    Timothy just went from poor to extremely rich by doing what he thought was a great deal. Never to expect his "rich friends" to try and ruin him but actually made him richer every time.
    I will always view this story as an example of how life can go even when the odds don't add up.

    • @malumkishin8608
      @malumkishin8608 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Or a example of the Upper Class trying to screw over someone of Lower-Class and the world handing them L after L after L.

    • @bd12544
      @bd12544 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      There’s no “dumb luck” like white male dumb luck. Repulsive.

    • @DefeatLust
      @DefeatLust 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@malumkishin8608 Or an example of EXTREMELY, unbelievable, and absolute dumb luck. When compared to the thousands and thousands of stories that went the opposite way, his story should serve as a reminder that lottery wins do exist and you shouldn't ever depend on them.

    • @sonicartzldesignerclan5763
      @sonicartzldesignerclan5763 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@malumkishin8608 Bro the reason you view them as up and low class cause of the money they process tell me you know nothing of this world
      They wanted to bring him down but not cause he was a " low " class
      Bro were not in a hollywood movie.

  • @josephbentley6591
    @josephbentley6591 3 ปีที่แล้ว +708

    Plot twist: Timothy was a super genius who wrote in his own language he developed and was just trolling everyone else

    • @csar07.
      @csar07. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      He is just the main character trolling the whole world of NPCs.

    • @fajitafinesser
      @fajitafinesser 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Oh shoot

    • @angelrosario969
      @angelrosario969 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      SHOWER THOUGHTS😎😎

    • @wrongturnVfor
      @wrongturnVfor 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      nah he was a time traveller. Dont you know that?

    • @spork__
      @spork__ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      we do a little trolling

  • @JediMentat
    @JediMentat 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2371

    When God created Timothy, he put ALL his points into the LUCK skill

  • @MamaDoctorJones
    @MamaDoctorJones 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1690

    Why is Timothy the most hilarious person on the planet?! 😆 i want a copy of his book

    • @Gixsir
      @Gixsir 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      I bet he was a great time to hang out with

    • @wendymcclanahan8719
      @wendymcclanahan8719 2 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      @@perryshaffer8358 HE'S STILL MAKING MONEY!
      LOL

    • @yeemawheaver1387
      @yeemawheaver1387 2 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      @@Gixsir unless you're his wife.

    • @andremaltais2291
      @andremaltais2291 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      I have an original set of the books.

    • @brenndanmcdonaugh1672
      @brenndanmcdonaugh1672 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      It's on project Gutenberg for free. Complete with the legendary spelling and page of punctuation

  • @itslitgamestv6827
    @itslitgamestv6827 ปีที่แล้ว +727

    This man made it onto a MrBallen video without anything bad happening. Now that is pure luck!

    • @meganleslie9069
      @meganleslie9069 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +49

      Apparently that's what Timothy is made of

    • @angelvirola9611
      @angelvirola9611 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      Should of know from the change in music huh 😂

    • @angelamarie88
      @angelamarie88 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      According to Wikipedia, this seems pretty bad: "Timothy frequently told visitors that his wife (who was actually alive) had died, and that the woman frequenting the building was simply her ghost. In one notable episode, Dexter faked his own death to see how people would react, and about 3,000 people attended Dexter's mock wake. When Dexter did not see his wife cry, he revealed the hoax and promptly caned her for not sufficiently mourning his death."

    • @Jeudaos
      @Jeudaos 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      holy shit, your right!

    • @n8guy
      @n8guy 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      He died! Twice!

  • @margaritarestrepo5695
    @margaritarestrepo5695 2 ปีที่แล้ว +660

    Just the image of Timothy so happy with his new job as the "Informant of deer" brightens my life 😂

    • @macshatchetman13
      @macshatchetman13 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      I kinda want that job. 🤔

    • @JustFunandGames
      @JustFunandGames 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@macshatchetman13 7-11 has an opening for "produce manager"...

    • @psycholaw4394
      @psycholaw4394 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      One day he discovered that for the first time, there was a lot of bucks in Moldon

    • @erkaderka3571
      @erkaderka3571 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @Sunfeld Jiramhir haha I like thinking that he was an informant for deer police

    • @scared10death57
      @scared10death57 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm picturing him as Charlie from Always Sunny in my mind.

  • @firefly5677
    @firefly5677 3 ปีที่แล้ว +362

    Timothy Dexter, Informer of Deer, is now officially my favorite historical figure. What an absolute legend

    • @richierottweiler923
      @richierottweiler923 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      He is indeed the historical boss of bosses

    • @blacklight310
      @blacklight310 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      This goes to show you can be dumb af and still make it as long as you have confidence and a lot of luck of course.

    • @WinterSoldier7207
      @WinterSoldier7207 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      An absolute madlad, if you will

    • @jamiemiller1885
      @jamiemiller1885 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      For real

    • @rdoc7818
      @rdoc7818 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That’s *Lord* Timothy Dexter to you, peon.

  • @Vaille32
    @Vaille32 3 ปีที่แล้ว +231

    20 years ago, I investigated an auto accident in the suburbs of Chicago. I asked the driver to complete a written statement form about his crash. For the other driver’s name, he wrote “Bambi but I don’t know.” For the color of the other vehicle, he wrote “faun.” The address of the other driver? “The forests of illinois.” I’ve investigated everything from auto accidents to homicides, but I will always remember that guy. He was being serious, too. We should nominate him to be the next Informer of Deer.

    • @kategulick4781
      @kategulick4781 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I think this is the funniest thing I've ever read.

    • @jennarobin2748
      @jennarobin2748 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      That's such a cool experience! Thanks for sharing!👍✌

    • @d0dge.609
      @d0dge.609 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      That’s a cool little story, thank you.

    • @misselissa608
      @misselissa608 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hilarious!

    • @purplepacks7175
      @purplepacks7175 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Which suburb of Chicago are u talking about? I live in Chicago so I'm curious as to which suburb this is because depending on which one this story may or may not be surprising

  • @MizziTheFoxdragon
    @MizziTheFoxdragon 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +46

    I hope this guy’s tomb stone says something like “ he was dumb as a brick, mad as a hatter but luckier than a leprechaun” 😂

  • @dragonking1261
    @dragonking1261 3 ปีที่แล้ว +482

    This is the luckiest man in history. It's like the world just said, "This man, this man right here, is the one."

    • @HjCrawford
      @HjCrawford 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      😂😂😂

    • @badwabbit
      @badwabbit 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      No freaking joke I can't believe this is real

    • @gizmoforest6954
      @gizmoforest6954 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Why did I think of him as Forest gump of his day.

    • @Iglooklutz
      @Iglooklutz 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fucking joke

    • @Iglooklutz
      @Iglooklutz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      O O
      l

  • @bisqwikbatter6486
    @bisqwikbatter6486 3 ปีที่แล้ว +455

    "Because periodically, Timothy would confuse George Washington's name with Pit, and nobody could tell him otherwise."
    This sentence right here

    • @hunter66630
      @hunter66630 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      LMAO :)
      i laughed out loud when i heard that

    • @PancakeWaffle1720
      @PancakeWaffle1720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@hunter66630
      Me too 😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @gandalf_thegrey
      @gandalf_thegrey 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      This man used all the luck of future generations. What a legend

    • @WideAwakeHuman
      @WideAwakeHuman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Like W.T.F... bahaha this dude is a legend

    • @paul7339
      @paul7339 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      William Pitt, first earl of chatham. Timothy dexter was illiterate and uneducated, and washington and pitt looked similar, yes im defending the misunderstanding of a dead 18th century ignoramus.

  • @chrismba777
    @chrismba777 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1442

    The fact no one has made a movie about this man's life is, in itself, amazing. The title should be, "A Pickle for the Knowing Ones"

    • @danny1229c
      @danny1229c 3 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      Here's an F go ahead and sprinkle it in where you see fit 😂

    • @danny1229c
      @danny1229c 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      And sprinkle it you did. 👍

    • @lisaprince6867
      @lisaprince6867 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      SAME!

    • @rachelgonzalez8051
      @rachelgonzalez8051 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      It's actually a really great title!

    • @brubaker1212
      @brubaker1212 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      WTF!? Please tell me you’re joking

  • @unrealmemories1351
    @unrealmemories1351 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +171

    The shenanigans the other rich people put Timothy up to were Acme level hilarity.

    • @ImehSmith
      @ImehSmith 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      👍👍🤣🤣

    • @JRuiz-qp9xx
      @JRuiz-qp9xx 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @JustinOhren-iy2tu
      @JustinOhren-iy2tu 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Right!. That's all I could think of while listening to this.. he is the type of dude to walk over the edge of a cliff and still just keep walking without falling because he didn't look down just believed with all of his will that he could walk on air..

    • @DonFahquidmi
      @DonFahquidmi 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      😂 Your comment is Acme level 😂❤

  • @mikehoncho35
    @mikehoncho35 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1193

    He was a real life Forrest Gump of his day. I can’t believe no one has made a movie about him.

    • @SadbutTrue84
      @SadbutTrue84 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      He's like the Great Grandfather of The Big Fish😅.

    • @soarrefly
      @soarrefly 2 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      Can we get a petition going? I'd pay tickets to see that!

    • @rodgerbroadway2195
      @rodgerbroadway2195 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      This would be an awesome movie.

    • @plixplop
      @plixplop 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      I almost wonder if Forrest Gump takes some inspiration from this story

    • @varunrajkhole6284
      @varunrajkhole6284 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I was thinking the same exact thing!! Totally movie material.

  • @v1nc3nz05
    @v1nc3nz05 3 ปีที่แล้ว +307

    "Go ahead and sprinkle these in as you see fit"
    Oh my sides. This man wasn't an idiot.

    • @kdavis4910
      @kdavis4910 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yes he was.

    • @robertseay4747
      @robertseay4747 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Yes he was but The Lord was in this mans corner bro. Hahaha! It's an example of how He protects us. Us being the simple ones

    • @letsart6434
      @letsart6434 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      He was a genius

    • @MsILIKEMAPLE
      @MsILIKEMAPLE 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Mr Ballen actually switched the words. The original is 'solt and pepper' not 'sprinkle'.

    • @treykearns4867
      @treykearns4867 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I know rite. I lulled at that 1

  • @DreDredel3
    @DreDredel3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +613

    Timothy was simply meant to be rich regardless of how people felt about him 😂

    • @adomede
      @adomede 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      That man had a dream 💭

    • @luk3896
      @luk3896 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@adomede 😂😂

  • @jesse_cole
    @jesse_cole 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +26

    I can't tell you how much I would pay to get my hands on the original copy of that "Informer of Deer" logbook.

  • @ItaK-ql7yz
    @ItaK-ql7yz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1298

    It's like Timothy was created with all of the luck in the universe.

    • @bitchtarts
      @bitchtarts 3 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      All the luck none of the intelligence

    • @cats_are_love
      @cats_are_love 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      @@bitchtarts what do u need smarts, if u have the happies

    • @maureenhardy836
      @maureenhardy836 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Forrest Gump??

    • @anonanonsen9829
      @anonanonsen9829 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      reminds me of my fallout 4 character with 10 luck 1 intellignece

    • @LoneWoIfPack19
      @LoneWoIfPack19 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Right?!?! Somehow even more then Forest Gump.

  • @brantnuttall
    @brantnuttall 3 ปีที่แล้ว +228

    Seriously, this man's life story should be made into a comedy film. I'm crying with laughter!

    • @sheena691
      @sheena691 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Forrest Gump

    • @davidkuzur5186
      @davidkuzur5186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If I was a famous producer, director, whatever, I'd be jotting down a bunch of MrB's stories to pitch to my 'friends' in an effort to drum up cash to turn a lot of these into films, funny and otherwise. Hell, letting them hear Ballen tell the stories would probably hook most of them right there!

    • @bentonrp
      @bentonrp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It's funny that it took place, at the start, before the United States. You rarely hear stories about aristocrat life back then! Shudder to think if he became a founding father. What a pickle for the knowing one that would be...

    • @emabeyta1974
      @emabeyta1974 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Actually its kinda like the Jerk with Steve Martin. That was a great movie and pretty similar. MrBallen good job!!

    • @brantnuttall
      @brantnuttall 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@emabeyta1974 I haven't seen that but I do like Steve Martin so I guess I should check it out! Thanks!

  • @stephaniesharrow513
    @stephaniesharrow513 2 ปีที่แล้ว +337

    I played this story for my in laws, kids, and husband after dinner together around the fire last night. I've NEVER seen my father-in-law laugh as hard as he did last night hearing each twist of this story. Wonderful storytelling.

    • @totallyfrozen
      @totallyfrozen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @@robojelico
      If you’re triggered, please take it elsewhere. Nobody here hurt you. Don’t ruin everything with your negativity.

    • @eveningstar6700
      @eveningstar6700 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      awwwe!! thats the best!!!

  • @bcav712
    @bcav712 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +43

    Timothy might be one of the single most amazing men to have ever lived.

  • @mentaldavethefirst
    @mentaldavethefirst 3 ปีที่แล้ว +378

    I'm sad that it took 38 years of my life to hear this wonderful story.

    • @rockman49er
      @rockman49er 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      46 years for me lol

    • @elizabethbarringer2791
      @elizabethbarringer2791 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Heck I am 61 it's a wonderful story . best part it's true.

    • @bentonrp
      @bentonrp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I'm 38 too, and I never heard of this, and I made a board game for fun all about eccentric aristocrats before the British Colonies became the U.S.! :P

    • @jaalaj6610
      @jaalaj6610 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same! ☺️

    • @akshaykushawaha2160
      @akshaykushawaha2160 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      18😅😂

  • @MummaQuan
    @MummaQuan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

    He decided he didn’t really like his wife anymore & started to just tell people she was dead 😂😂😂 and they just went along with it and viewed her as a ghost 🤣
    Somebody needs to make that mans life into a movie. Unbelievable & hilarious.

    • @bentonrp
      @bentonrp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      "First I was fake-dead, now YOU be fake-dead!" Hey, he found a way around divorce, if ever there was any! 😃

    • @movielibrary3608
      @movielibrary3608 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      At first it's hilarious but then imagine being the wife and no one will acknowledge your existence. Next level abuse.

    • @bentonrp
      @bentonrp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@movielibrary3608 I've had that, and you just do whatever you want with whoever you want, no consequence! 😅

    • @nicholaswroblewski3069
      @nicholaswroblewski3069 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      that movie would suck bc nothing bad ever happened to him.

    • @bentonrp
      @bentonrp 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nicholaswroblewski3069 Lolol! That's so true!

  • @ValCronin
    @ValCronin 3 ปีที่แล้ว +508

    I love how he just loaded a bunch of random stuff onto ships and sent them to the caribbean and people were like 'Whatever is on this boat, I am gonna buy it and use the hell out of it'

    • @Abdullah-uv2pv
      @Abdullah-uv2pv 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm from the Caribbean

    • @deecee4644
      @deecee4644 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I think that speaks volumes about how resourceful folks from the Caribbean are!

    • @evanrodarte4290
      @evanrodarte4290 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I love how these unwitting psychics called all these incredible investments and yet they didn't profit AT ALL.

    • @danielstaab1267
      @danielstaab1267 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Well he only sent cats to the Caribbean, did you even listen to it?

    • @shinigami1194
      @shinigami1194 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@danielstaab1267 And warming pans.

  • @donnas.1075
    @donnas.1075 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    This one is hilarious! I love how all the aristocrats plans kept backfiring and Timothy just got richer & richer. Talk about karma!

  • @TheAceAllagator
    @TheAceAllagator 3 ปีที่แล้ว +938

    Timothy: this year i lost my wife
    His wife: quit telling everyone I'm dead!
    Timothy: sometimes I can still hear her voice

    • @OHOE1
      @OHOE1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      sam o’nella has made a video about this

    • @josebatxu32
      @josebatxu32 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@OHOE1 sam o'nella

    • @OHOE1
      @OHOE1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@josebatxu32
      😉

    • @nightynightshade
      @nightynightshade 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lmaooo 😂😂😂

    • @kv2315
      @kv2315 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      imagine him saying this with a british accent

  • @postarmenia
    @postarmenia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +224

    You can't fight fate, he was just destined to be rich

  • @andrewolson1664
    @andrewolson1664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +878

    Lord Timothy Dexter Informer of Deer is officially my favorite person in history.

    • @rocketamadeus3730
      @rocketamadeus3730 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      I know, right? What a legend.. In reality he was probably an insufferable dickhead, but it's funny now.

    • @andrewolson1664
      @andrewolson1664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I love and hate that this is probably true.

    • @haydenglendenning4305
      @haydenglendenning4305 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Litterally is a wife beater

    • @andrewolson1664
      @andrewolson1664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      We don’t even know if that happened for sure. Nevertheless, it was a different time, he died over 200 years ago. Don’t need to go full woke on him. Doesn’t make it right, but that’s how things happened back then.

    • @haydenglendenning4305
      @haydenglendenning4305 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@andrewolson1664 don't believe in being woke tbh I just don't like wife beaters rest is nuts granted.

  • @destiny.on.the.phone.
    @destiny.on.the.phone. 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    Bro ... This is like the most epic story EVER! Thank you so much for covering it!

  • @Qertii
    @Qertii ปีที่แล้ว +761

    This might be the most unbelievable true story I've ever heard.

  • @Queenie97
    @Queenie97 3 ปีที่แล้ว +576

    Timothy was ahead of his time. He is the type of guy who would have made a killing in cryptocurrency.

    • @mask938
      @mask938 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I bet if Timothy was elected as president, he would make it work somehow. He's just so insanely lucky that anything he does works out for him in the end.

    • @xNEVETS02x
      @xNEVETS02x 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Hes the type of guy who would have went all in on Dogecoin in 2014 and made 10,000% gains

    • @teijaflink2226
      @teijaflink2226 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      He reminded me of Forest Gump.

    • @dback50
      @dback50 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Honestly though

    • @vimal-cliobconsulting
      @vimal-cliobconsulting 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mask938 lol

  • @madelinebrown7808
    @madelinebrown7808 2 ปีที่แล้ว +445

    “Go ahead and sprinkle these as you see fit“ is the best FU to bullies I’ve ever heard of. No one was hurt by that and he got his point across clearly 🥺

    • @Jlove-hf9xw
      @Jlove-hf9xw 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I agree that is the way that Timothy to flip them off

    • @ProfessorPerhaps
      @ProfessorPerhaps 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Right? like I’m curious if he was able to piece together that everyone was actually mocking his book himself, or if like a friend of his told him they were & then he did that as an intentional “middle finger” or an “FU” to everyone, or if because of his illiteracy & all that did he actually consider it as legit constructive criticism so he happily added that page not knowing any better lol, either way I’m glad shit kept working out for him tho

    • @motorbreathjz
      @motorbreathjz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      i think im going to use that line the next time i hear from the punctuation police

    • @SparkleDolly01
      @SparkleDolly01 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      No one was hurt except the wife he beat with his cane 😂

    • @eveningstar6700
      @eveningstar6700 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      did u forget the part he beat his wife with a cane?

  • @jordanlee2009
    @jordanlee2009 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Wtf ?! 😂😂 how bloody lucky can you get ! I love that MrBallen put out takes at end too i bet it took a few attempts to get thru recording without bursting into hysterics 😂

  • @detcordxxxi
    @detcordxxxi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +630

    A 2nd grade drop out who can't read, write, or think critically is literally all we elect nowadays. He was just ahead of his time.

    • @matthewschmoyer8552
      @matthewschmoyer8552 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Lmao! Yes

    • @superd9072
      @superd9072 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Very well said

    • @UnitedRedDevils
      @UnitedRedDevils 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Facts:0

    • @joebrito3192
      @joebrito3192 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      right now its an old man with dementia that gets "knocked down by wind"

    • @ccorbin83
      @ccorbin83 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      😂😂😂😂

  • @jpduffy2003
    @jpduffy2003 3 ปีที่แล้ว +351

    Timothy dropped the mic like a boss at the end with the punctuation slap.

    • @kj12351
      @kj12351 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That he did! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @smoothcombo2899
    @smoothcombo2899 3 ปีที่แล้ว +422

    The funniest part of this is the fact that he told everyone his wife was a ghost and they just accepted it😂

    • @liiammiller7881
      @liiammiller7881 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Lol my parents when guests are over.

    • @chrismurray1084
      @chrismurray1084 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hahaha this is a great series hope he makes more

    • @mattyetsko5969
      @mattyetsko5969 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      He literally phased her out of reality while being alive 😂😂

    • @dillbro1247
      @dillbro1247 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      😂😂😂

    • @kitkatpangirl8059
      @kitkatpangirl8059 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Literally the entire time I watched this video I was laughing my ass off. Fcking hilarious!!! 😂😂🤣🤣

  • @justinhadley2583
    @justinhadley2583 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    I think it's heartwarming how the cats got to start a new and successful life in the caribbean ❤

  • @AdamSlander888
    @AdamSlander888 3 ปีที่แล้ว +520

    Plot twist Timothy was a genius who trolled everyone by thinking he was dumb

    • @jessisblessed6689
      @jessisblessed6689 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Wouldn't that just be amazing!? Seriously. I like to think that was the case 😏

    • @LunaELugo
      @LunaELugo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I literally came to the comments to find this comment

    • @namoruse5812
      @namoruse5812 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      😂😂😂😂

    • @Gos1234567
      @Gos1234567 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Greatest hustler ever!

    • @brentfarvors192
      @brentfarvors192 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Nah, he was just extremely LUCKY...The New Castle strike ended immediately after all of Timothy's coal had all sold...The foreman lied saying it cost HALF of the cost they could mine it, and that he had sent 2 more ships FULL of it. It scared the miners back down in the mine.

  • @mitchellwright8771
    @mitchellwright8771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +299

    Thats the most unbelievable story ive ever heard. How da hell do u continuously keep getting rich on accident? And u cant read or write? And everyone hates you? AMAZING!!!

    • @marymorningstar4508
      @marymorningstar4508 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      God liked him and sent him lots of angels to help

    • @bt7594
      @bt7594 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      And their anger and resentment only fueled and advanced his wealth

    • @mitchellwright8771
      @mitchellwright8771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@marymorningstar4508 are u sure? Bcz how do u get away with beating your wife with a cane? Im pretty sure back then they didn't hold back

    • @mitchellwright8771
      @mitchellwright8771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@bt7594 talk about all the stars and planets and quasars aligning smh. That math is beyond regular understanding lol

    • @KimberlyBishh
      @KimberlyBishh 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Reminds me of Kramer
      "No job, Falls ass backwards into money, has sex without a relationship..."
      😆😆

  • @MW93249
    @MW93249 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4575

    I used to be a fan but while listening to this masterpiece I am a whole air conditioner now

  • @johnsducks9816
    @johnsducks9816 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Wow this guy sounds like an absolute legend thank you for telling his story

  • @amyrose5932
    @amyrose5932 2 ปีที่แล้ว +251

    This story was so delightful, I had to listen to it again immediately. 😂 I totally lost it when even the feral cats worked out. 😂😂😂

    • @Artistjohnlaws4173
      @Artistjohnlaws4173 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      never underestimate the power of a man who has GOD on his side.

    • @ShirleyLestrade
      @ShirleyLestrade ปีที่แล้ว

      I know, I thought for sure since now he wasn’t getting “advice” it would stop working out

  • @DJandThatsAll
    @DJandThatsAll 3 ปีที่แล้ว +514

    Timothy has to be the luckiest man alive.... Hes a perfect example of "sheer dumb luck"

    • @XFizzlepop-Berrytwist
      @XFizzlepop-Berrytwist 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Deer dumb luck.

    • @SpydersByte
      @SpydersByte 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist lel

    • @emperor-thesenate-palpatin5954
      @emperor-thesenate-palpatin5954 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Well, no, cuz he is dead. Like more then 100 years.

    • @TexasLadyS
      @TexasLadyS 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist 🤣🤣🤣

    • @randy6243
      @randy6243 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Love beats fear, God beats the devil, and the good will prevail.

  • @klkiley2922
    @klkiley2922 3 ปีที่แล้ว +240

    "Go ahead and sprinkle these in as you see fit." Had me rolling!

    • @tokemjuju8250
      @tokemjuju8250 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I know I cracked up laughing so hard I fell off my bed I was like this mofo is really just a complete smart ass like who tells everyone my wife is dead and as she walks by nah that's not her she's just a ghost

    • @cocoamcjaegermeister5534
      @cocoamcjaegermeister5534 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He was trolling at legendary levels😂

  • @astridmaack4516
    @astridmaack4516 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    As soon as I heard the name Timothy Dexter I knew how the story was gonna go. I originally heard it told by Sam O’Nella Academy first. Pretty hilarious story

  • @donjon123
    @donjon123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +186

    Motivational speakers: "You don't get lucky to get rich, you have to grind"
    Timotty:" hold my beer"

  • @wikidghost5822
    @wikidghost5822 3 ปีที่แล้ว +503

    I love this guy he couldn't lose money and convinced everyone that his wife was a ghost. I want a movie!!!!!

    • @ccompson2
      @ccompson2 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      seriously there has got to be a movie about this

    • @homemakingwisdom
      @homemakingwisdom 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Right! The ultimate silent treatment.

    • @joeb9645
      @joeb9645 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Staring Ryan Reynolds

    • @Cyanidesin
      @Cyanidesin 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Christopher Walker would be a better casting choice.

    • @ccompson2
      @ccompson2 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Cyanidesin Walken is way older than this guy lived to be so....nope

  • @zarasbazaar
    @zarasbazaar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    I have a lot more respect for a person who wants to work hard and succeed, even if he's not the smartest, than the supposedly smart people who think it's funny to humiliate him.

    • @SpookyShivers
      @SpookyShivers 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      That’s The Real Lesson Here. Most Humble Comment. ΑΩ

    • @katiek3396
      @katiek3396 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This is the karma of the people trying to humiliate him. He ended up getting the better end of every deal. I absolutely love it. His wife kinda got her dues though "nah, she's a ghost"

  • @jordan41621
    @jordan41621 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    RIP to Timothy Dexter he seems like he was a really nice and cool guy just different which I fw 💯💯🙏

  • @avabethmcghee3048
    @avabethmcghee3048 3 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    It's like they were trying to play "stop hitting yourself" with Timothy, but they were playing it with themselves.... and losing.

  • @terriaki1273
    @terriaki1273 2 ปีที่แล้ว +353

    This made my day. I love how they tried to ruin him and it totally backfired. He must have been the luckiest guy ever!!!

    • @robojelico
      @robojelico 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Too bad his wife had no luck, being physically abused and then forced to live as a ghost.

    • @totallyfrozen
      @totallyfrozen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@robojelico
      Sigh. Stop it. The whole thing happened over 200 years ago and sharing you’re personal history and triggers here doesn’t improve anything for anyone.

    • @motorbreathjz
      @motorbreathjz 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@robojelico pretty sally wally to bitch and moan about something like that

    • @dandy-dani
      @dandy-dani 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@totallyfrozen he legit pointed out a fact that's in the video how is that sharing personal information or triggers lmao

    • @TamaoMizuki
      @TamaoMizuki 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@totallyfrozen
      I mean he did beat his wife, I wanna assume that he didn't do that often and did it as a joke, but regardless he was kinda abusive.

  • @kevinaustin0369
    @kevinaustin0369 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    This is a PERFECT example of “The Law of Mind”. His success was born from believing. Therefore he was.

    • @mymak-jq1hy
      @mymak-jq1hy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      His success was built out of luck. Let’s not delude ourselves into thinking Timothy earned any of his money from sheer intelligence or hard work.

    • @MikkaThatPinkPuma
      @MikkaThatPinkPuma 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      aka he manifested his success

    • @TheChzoronzon
      @TheChzoronzon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And your post one of "The Law of Wishful Thinking"

    • @Daniel-dn2ot
      @Daniel-dn2ot 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah he made it ,one out of countless who tried.He is not an example of anything other than extreme luck.

  • @UgetTheMemo
    @UgetTheMemo 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I love these lighthearted videos. We need more of these to cleanse our palettes of the depressing stuff once in a while.

  • @ItsYaBoi418
    @ItsYaBoi418 3 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    Gotta love the “go ahead and sprinkle these in as you see fit” line. Truly, this is the biggest brain play of all time.

    • @prosoccer95
      @prosoccer95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yeah that tells me he atleast understood people couldn’t understand his writing and so had someone else write that line and even so, how its written doesnt sound like a person who is really this dumb. Guess the world will never know lol

    • @peflynn93
      @peflynn93 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I was 50/50 on this man at first, they're all claiming he's dumb, but tht last line filled in the picture. Not only was he brilliant, he was so brilliant he made basically his community think he was dumb.. and he literally played em all like a 🎻 fiddle 🎻. Definitely one of the funniest Ballen stories I've heard 👍

    • @orionthehunter217
      @orionthehunter217 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@peflynn93 He acted repeatedly on bad advice and just happened to get lucky. He didn't play anyone. He's just a wife-beating Forrest Gump.

    • @carolannroberts
      @carolannroberts 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      That’s funny. I found someone had criticized someone’s comment so I typed out several punctuations and told him to insert them where he felt they were needed. Comment sections are no place for grammar Nazis. Even email is very informal.

    • @mannylugz5872
      @mannylugz5872 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Timothy Dexter was actually the father of all trolls!

  • @firenight124
    @firenight124 3 ปีที่แล้ว +319

    This man is the Forrest Gump of the 18th Century.

    • @plumdutchess
      @plumdutchess 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      That's a perfect comparison! 😂

    • @Salsadans123
      @Salsadans123 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes

    • @cjam191
      @cjam191 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Just what I was thinking!

    • @impendingdoom385
      @impendingdoom385 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I was gonna make the exact same comment! 😆 Lol

    • @thebestusername5852
      @thebestusername5852 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This is 100% accurate 😂

  • @hillofbeans2692
    @hillofbeans2692 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Lord Timothy Dexter had the most incredibly lucky life. What an amazing story! I looked up information about him. I found pictures of his Massachusetts mansion, his famous people carvings, and I also found his book online! A movie should seriously be made about him. He is a legend! Thanks for sharing a cool story.

    • @katiecarlson5192
      @katiecarlson5192 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I feel like there is a movie made about him. At least it is so close it could be based off him. "Forest Gump" Or am I alone in this comparison?

    • @hillofbeans2692
      @hillofbeans2692 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@katiecarlson5192 "Forest Gump" was about a man who was mentally challenged. He went to war, came home, fell in love etc... I guess it could be somewhat like Lord Timothy Dexter.

    • @katiecarlson5192
      @katiecarlson5192 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@hillofbeans2692 yeah, I'm not saying it was exactly alike or literally based off of his life.
      Just In the aspect of luck and instant wealth despite being mentally handicapped.

    • @hillofbeans2692
      @hillofbeans2692 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@katiecarlson5192 Wouldn't it be nice if we were all that lucky? Maybe Lord Dexter's luck came because he wasn't a deep thinker? It's just a fascinating story. It seems a lot of people do a lot of crazy things and end up landing on their feet. We have a friend who we think is kind of nuts, and he has a nice home, cars a pool etc... While we think out everything, he's doing way better than us.

  • @rationalconservative386
    @rationalconservative386 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    My favorite part about Dexter is when he was mocked for his lack of punctuation in his book, "A Pickle for the Knowing Ones", he published it again had had multiple pages in the back of nothing but different punctuation marks. Lol

  • @rocketamadeus3730
    @rocketamadeus3730 3 ปีที่แล้ว +413

    I lost it when they looked at his "informer of deer" logs and they were just drawings of deer and gibberish XD

    • @MrRedberd
      @MrRedberd 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Charlie Day all the way

    • @SigHellion
      @SigHellion 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      😂😂😂

    • @Utubesanarc
      @Utubesanarc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It was the ghosts of deer that had been there 100s of years ago🧐

    • @luciaseacreature8705
      @luciaseacreature8705 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      or telling everyone his wife died but when they saw her walking about he told them she was a ghost

    • @GreenEyedGoblin
      @GreenEyedGoblin 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@MrRedberd and now I'm going to rage until someone casts him in a mini series about Timothy.

  • @andysarmiento1200
    @andysarmiento1200 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3040

    I genuinely thought this video was going to be about a stray cat who was king of all cats.

  • @georgemeurer9262
    @georgemeurer9262 3 ปีที่แล้ว +477

    The morale of this story: If you keep a positive mindset…your haters will never bring you down!

    • @jgabrysch03
      @jgabrysch03 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I disliked this to keep it at 69...but wanted to give you a thumb

    • @jgabrysch03
      @jgabrysch03 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      well 69 is gone so thumbs up

    • @tr6524
      @tr6524 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The morale of this story is quite high

    • @cranklabexplosion-labcentr8245
      @cranklabexplosion-labcentr8245 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      All day PMA!

    • @TheEpicSpire
      @TheEpicSpire 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      also, ignorance is bliss

  • @cl3488
    @cl3488 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    I love this story. I would like to hear more of these light-hearted strange stories.

    • @bd12544
      @bd12544 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It was dark A F.
      White men S U C K.

  • @LanaAndJen
    @LanaAndJen 3 ปีที่แล้ว +815

    This guy sounds like the luckiest man that ever lived

    • @whysoserious4274
      @whysoserious4274 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      Probably was the luckiest man back then xD
      If I was alive when he was I'd be his friend just cuz of how bizarre and hilarious he was lol
      That part about his wife being a ghost got me good 🤣

    • @ZombieSazza
      @ZombieSazza 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@whysoserious4274 I’d have totally befriended Timothy, he sounded hilarious

    • @wimpow
      @wimpow 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I wonder if this guys life is the inspiration of one quite famous story from Andersen (Denmark, the guy that wrote "The Little Mermaid"): Lille Claus og Store Claus (The small Claus and the Big Claus).
      BTW, a gruesome story, as all stories at the time, but quite funny too.

    • @michaelnizza414
      @michaelnizza414 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Nope. Theres a guy who survived jumping on a grenade in world war 2 at 16 years old and years later his parachute didnt open and he lived.

    • @henryschriemer1133
      @henryschriemer1133 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I'm Done and when he faked his funeral, I had to pull over my car from laughing too hard.

  • @kaylabrownell1268
    @kaylabrownell1268 3 ปีที่แล้ว +199

    I can only imagine these aristocrats getting mad and grumbling like a Loony Toons character when Timothy kept succeeding lol

    • @mychemicaltea
      @mychemicaltea 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      this whole thing was like a looney toon episode LOL

    • @joeb9645
      @joeb9645 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yosemite Sam stomping his hat

    • @kaylabrownell1268
      @kaylabrownell1268 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@joeb9645 🤣😂😂

  • @ZOI-Omega
    @ZOI-Omega 3 ปีที่แล้ว +173

    This was incredible. He literally used an UNO reverse card before Uno.

    • @chriswise7978
      @chriswise7978 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Stop it! He's not a god!!

    • @dreadthedeadly6906
      @dreadthedeadly6906 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Of course the Ace of Spades made a card joke 🤣

    • @jack0fsp8des16
      @jack0fsp8des16 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Something ain't right here ?

    • @dreadthedeadly6906
      @dreadthedeadly6906 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Oh god, we’re surrounded

    • @ZOI-Omega
      @ZOI-Omega 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jack0fsp8des16 lol

  • @sleeperholdASMR
    @sleeperholdASMR 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Timothy is the poster child for "dumb luck" and I adore him for it lmao
    THE SECOND EDITION OF HIS BOOK LMAO I seriously love this guy
    And the bloopers lmfao this is without a doubt my favorite video of yours so far.

  • @Lorenzantium
    @Lorenzantium 3 ปีที่แล้ว +135

    Timmy was basically the most lucky person to ever live. He knew nothing about investing and listened to horrible advice from people he thought were friends, but somehow came out on top. He could have invested in floppy tacos from Taco Bell and came out on top lmao!

    • @bobbygalyon5580
      @bobbygalyon5580 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Well yes because real authentic tacos are floppy. You're eating that disgusting americanized tacos you only get at fast food joints. Authentic mexican tacos dont come in hard shells bud.

    • @TheStonedEvo
      @TheStonedEvo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@bobbygalyon5580 hard shell tacos are not exclusive to fast food restaurants

    • @johnv6806
      @johnv6806 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@bobbygalyon5580 thats kinda like saying pizza sucks because its not how they make it in Italy. Millions of people still love it. Taco bell is the best Mexican place I've eaten at.

    • @tiredofit1968
      @tiredofit1968 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's called Karma.

    • @raulsalcedo8332
      @raulsalcedo8332 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      There's a similar success story except it's done with horrible medical advice from a dropout computer guy unto everybody that thinks he's looking out for us.

  • @mikeroz1894
    @mikeroz1894 3 ปีที่แล้ว +447

    “Some people can fall into shit, and come out smelling like a rose”

    • @JoJo-dv1rz
      @JoJo-dv1rz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      This phrase summed up his whole life 🤣

    • @GF93725
      @GF93725 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@JoJo-dv1rz yes indeed.

    • @kdavis4910
      @kdavis4910 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I believe the saying states, " Fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like roses." 😉🙃

    • @hondaisgoat3967
      @hondaisgoat3967 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That’s so right

    • @PiXie232
      @PiXie232 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Too true.. too true..

  • @blanning2058
    @blanning2058 3 ปีที่แล้ว +140

    I had a proud mom moment the other night when I overheard my daughter listening to you. I hadn't even told her about you, she just found you herself.

    • @blanning2058
      @blanning2058 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hell yea! My life is complete now that I have Mr Ballens heart! 😂

    • @mcoupe69
      @mcoupe69 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@blanning2058 you should go after his skin next.. that’s a lofty goal for a budding fan gurl 😬

    • @thepensmith1
      @thepensmith1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      this is wholesome

    • @shoshishaw8762
      @shoshishaw8762 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      That's when you know you've parented correctly

    • @izzyjdesigns3989
      @izzyjdesigns3989 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I found out my son watches him too. I’ve never been more proud.

  • @Tomdog83
    @Tomdog83 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    The title of his book, to me, seems as if he was giving specific homage to the "smart" people who helped him amass his fortune. That was my first thought, or maybe, depending on how pickles were portrayed in the time, giving an F-you to them.
    This was the best, most hilarious story.

  • @33agnimitraroysanjuktamall80
    @33agnimitraroysanjuktamall80 3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

    The most justified phobia that I have is Mr.Ballen running out of Stories 😭

  • @ericcartman3328
    @ericcartman3328 2 ปีที่แล้ว +671

    This is hilarious. He's like a 1700's Forest Gump with a little bit of a trolling side to him 😂

    • @suma5939
      @suma5939 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      just so you know, i totally respect your autoritah! :)

    • @O_Ciel_Phant0mhive
      @O_Ciel_Phant0mhive 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      * abusive

    • @amylynnsgraphics
      @amylynnsgraphics 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      America's first troll lol!

    • @debbylou5729
      @debbylou5729 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Um, he wasn’t trolling. This was the real him

    • @didyasaysomethin2me
      @didyasaysomethin2me ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I thought Forest Gump too. But I added in a reference to Charlie Gordon (Flowers for Algernon) because he reminds me a bit of that too.

  • @SuziQ499
    @SuziQ499 3 ปีที่แล้ว +756

    I love this story he's like the Forrest Gump of Georgian times.

    • @e.starling141
      @e.starling141 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Thats so funny. I was telling my husband about this story and how they should make a movie about him and he said "They already did. Its called Forest Gump." So there you go. Lol.

    • @UpperDarbyDetailing
      @UpperDarbyDetailing 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      What are Georgian times?

    • @Adendum82
      @Adendum82 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      🤣🤣🤣 He just amazingly falls ass backwards into great luck and good fortune over and over again. Anyone and everyone just happens to critically need the most useless crap anyone could ever ship to a place with absolutely zero requirement for it, and he just manages to be that guy. I'm convinced more and more each day; This world is a video game and someone really shit the bed creating my inane background character life. I could've been this guy 😂

    • @e.starling141
      @e.starling141 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@UpperDarbyDetailing A period in British history before the Victorian era. Started in the early 1700s to the the 1830s. It sort of encompasses the style of art, dress and food and dance etc. It was named this because it was during the reign of 4 different King Georges.

    • @colleenf620
      @colleenf620 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes!

  • @Thatkidswift
    @Thatkidswift 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Bro invented ghosting

  • @padawanmidnight6786
    @padawanmidnight6786 2 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    Basically to sum it up; When your haters want to see you fail but God has other plans for you lol 😁
    Timothy is a Legend!!

    • @MoonlightSonata88
      @MoonlightSonata88 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol you forgot he was a violent lunatic who would also beat his wife

    • @josephredden7280
      @josephredden7280 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      This story warmed my heart a true underdog story of a man born at the bottom to end up being one of the richest men in America. Even though everyone wanted him to fail absolutely loved it.

    • @erikagonzalez7070
      @erikagonzalez7070 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@josephredden7280 right! He's ok in my book. Glad we all got the chance to hear his story. Thanx to Mr.Ballen.

    • @londalesheil
      @londalesheil ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Didn’t he abuse women?

  • @lolalam1669
    @lolalam1669 3 ปีที่แล้ว +161

    When people don’t want you to win but life says nope you gonna win today

    • @donvaldez841
      @donvaldez841 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      and tomorrow

    • @MissSeaSea
      @MissSeaSea 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      As someone who never wins, I was straight up crying and cheering for him! Like, this dude is the ultimate underdog.
      God don’t like ugly! I hope those other dudes figured out how to be happy, for him and for themselves

    • @G_Robb
      @G_Robb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He was destined to be a wealthy man! Way to go Timothy!

    • @SA-Bean-Bean
      @SA-Bean-Bean 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I would love to know! 😂

    • @mahannaalsalmi3749
      @mahannaalsalmi3749 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      yea thats very true😂😂😂

  • @alaskansummertime
    @alaskansummertime 3 ปีที่แล้ว +177

    I read this in the Bathroom Reader years ago. The story never gets old. This dude was a living Forest Gump.

    • @gardener3030
      @gardener3030 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      "I was running!"

    • @lennyball3885
      @lennyball3885 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do you remember what edition of the Bathroom Reader it was? I have a bunch of them. But have only read one. I'd like to read the one with this story in it. Thanks. 😁

    • @dean6708
      @dean6708 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahahhaaaa

    • @alaskansummertime
      @alaskansummertime 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@lennyball3885 Oh hell who knows. This was over ten years ago and I had read all of them up until then. About the best series of books I've ever come across. Tons of stories just like this one.

    • @lennyball3885
      @lennyball3885 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@alaskansummertime hahaha fair enough. Sounds like me. I read more books than I can remember. What's really bad is when you buy copies of books you already have. 🤔 🤣

  • @jenmarie03
    @jenmarie03 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    YESSSS!!!!! Bloopers!!! I always wait until the very end for bloopers & this one has been the very best! Thank you! 🎉❤

  • @glowinthedarkshark9396
    @glowinthedarkshark9396 3 ปีที่แล้ว +241

    This man should be in movies and shows. Truly, his story begs to be made, with a birtish cast.

  • @RyanSurfsYoutube
    @RyanSurfsYoutube 3 ปีที่แล้ว +439

    This story is evidence of 2 things:
    1. There is a God
    2. He has a sense of humor

    • @sanfran801
      @sanfran801 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Indeed

    • @juderichards1856
      @juderichards1856 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Not really evidence for god but he has a sense of humor

    • @Persian-Immortal
      @Persian-Immortal 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Cruel sense of humor!

    • @Etherman7
      @Etherman7 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      This guy is Reverse-Job. "Hey, Satan, betcha this guy will be good even if I make it so he literally cannot fail."
      "You're on!"
      I don't know who would've won that bet, but everybody gets to reap the story all the same.

    • @brianfitch5469
      @brianfitch5469 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Karma

  • @xxzacht1xx
    @xxzacht1xx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +137

    One of my favorite disclaimers MrBallen does is “no matter how absurd this story gets, remember it’s true”. You know it’s gonna be pure gold lol

  • @McCoy62
    @McCoy62 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Your bloopers are so funny. The way you laugh at some of the copy cracks me up every time!! You and ol Seagull Lung's ads are nothing short of genius as well.
    ❤ You've the best John and we love you!❤

  • @corymesser1569
    @corymesser1569 3 ปีที่แล้ว +121

    I feel like timothy was low key smart. Right there at the end gave everybody a big fk you! "Go ahead and sprinkle these in as you see fit." Hilarious!

  • @emlynweaver8102
    @emlynweaver8102 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    This story was so unbelievable that if released as a film, people would just scoff and say what terrible writing; no one would believe a tall-tale like that. I can only dream of having Timothy’s luck.

    • @raulsalcedo8332
      @raulsalcedo8332 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      No one would believe a tall tale like that yet here we are believing that we are amidst a pandemic when virtually there's nothing alarmingly different aside from the people out there signaling how deeply they believe in it.

    • @Shaylok
      @Shaylok 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Paraphrasing Mark Twain: The difference between fiction and reality is that fiction has to be believable.

    • @colebelinsky881
      @colebelinsky881 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Forest Gump?

    • @spazemfathemcazemmeleggymi272
      @spazemfathemcazemmeleggymi272 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@raulsalcedo8332 yep, guess we'll never learn😂

  • @Transilvanian90
    @Transilvanian90 2 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    I'm convinced this dude is actually super brilliant and was trolling the shit out of everyone around him.

    • @ladytionne1
      @ladytionne1 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      That’s what I was I thinking lol because they’re is absolutely no way everything/time they told him to do something bad it benefited him lol

  • @jennifer2071
    @jennifer2071 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    They need to make a biographical movie/comedy about Lord Dexter. I can think of a few funny men to play the part 😊

  • @TrumpIsCowardTraitor
    @TrumpIsCowardTraitor 3 ปีที่แล้ว +486

    "He decided he doesn't really like his wife anymore, so he decided to tell everyone that she is dead." - This shit i too funny to be real.

    • @natiive1444
      @natiive1444 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Oh man i near died laughing when it got to that part😂

    • @LuckyBadger
      @LuckyBadger 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      This is where the term "to be ghosted" came from!

    • @mr.jameson218
      @mr.jameson218 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      You calling Ballen a liar, boah?

    • @shirleycoombs7001
      @shirleycoombs7001 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @makethepeoplethink
      @makethepeoplethink 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Alteast he didnt kill her 🤦

  • @RachaelClag
    @RachaelClag 3 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    The first person to ever "ghost" someone to avoid the relationship!! 😂

  • @philippebreault560
    @philippebreault560 3 ปีที่แล้ว +296

    How this is not a movie... his life would make a great comedy/drama

    • @katietaylor8314
      @katietaylor8314 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I know right??

    • @myibook141
      @myibook141 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Will Ferrell was born for this role

    • @Utubesanarc
      @Utubesanarc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@myibook141 big red from pinnapple express also

    • @bunsmom
      @bunsmom 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      A bit of Forrest Gump

    • @warriormama67
      @warriormama67 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Just said that before I saw this.😅