What They Don’t Tell You About Marriage: You Marry The History | Jonathan Evans

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ต.ค. 2024
  • Jonathan Evans, and his wife Kanika Evans touch on the reality of marriage. When you marry the history, you're committing yourself to something that is far more important than just another person. You're committing yourself to a legacy that will last long after both of you are gone.
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    Jonathan Evans, a mentor, author, speaker, and former NFL fullback treasures his relationship with Christ along with the opportunity to use his life to glorify God. Jonathan seeks to impact today’s athletes, men, and young adults by equipping and encouraging them in their faith.
    Jonathan serves with his pastor, friend, and father, Dr. Tony Evans, both in the local church and the national ministry. They also teamed up together to write Get in the Game, a practical guidebook filled with sports analogies and spiritual truths aimed at strengthening readers with the skills they need for living victoriously.

ความคิดเห็น • 156

  • @Dobbie890
    @Dobbie890 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    We come from different backgrounds, but God knows how to put His people together!
    Opposites attract because we want to know someone different then ourselves! It intrigues us! We are to be equally yoked to a Believer in Christ Jesus!
    One have a positive where the other a negative like a battery, but you both balance each other because Jesus is the Center of the Balancing Beam! 🕺🏽💃🏾☝🏽✝️❤️‍🔥

  • @AyanaInChrist
    @AyanaInChrist ปีที่แล้ว +98

    As I am listening to this I realize that there is a perquisite level of wholeness needed for marriage to work and wholeness is not perfection because the two whole people continue to grow. Its beautiful.

  • @bonitahopkins2958
    @bonitahopkins2958 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I think your wife is absolutely beautiful. She has such natural and God's beauty. She looks younger than you. You two look great together. Your children has to be very handsome people. I am glad you decided to share self-help techniques to the public for our families today. God bless you 🙏 ❤ 🙌

  • @takaramorse5675
    @takaramorse5675 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    This is great. I just started marriage counseling with my husband. And our first assignment is on our expectations for each other. And this really help me out with my first assignment. We’ve been married for seven years. One thing that we did not include in our marriage at first was God we were both in the world and we are now saved.

    • @KarlainChrist
      @KarlainChrist ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Praise God! May Papa always bless your marriage in Jesus Name, Amen!

    • @tsav1613
      @tsav1613 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      You will see how the love of God can weld 2 people together

  • @marjorymsuku9312
    @marjorymsuku9312 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    "Be steadfast, unmovable; always abounding in the work of the Lord..."😊❤🙏

  • @WealthyPlaceMinistry
    @WealthyPlaceMinistry ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Oh my goodness! We come from similar backgrounds. As a little girl I was sad a lot of times not having my father in my life, but as I got older I counted my blessings. I hated it for my mom having to raise children in a sense alone; not having the children support or just the overall support of a spouse. Likewise, my mom didn’t bash my dad either… She did what she had to do, which was to raise her children. I thank God for Jesus, a father’s love like no other. l am so grateful for the community of people who were there for me. 🤗🙏🏽🙌🏽💜

  • @deefinefit
    @deefinefit ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I had to learn my triggers in order for my husband to learn what triggers me. That knowledge has helped us so much.

  • @thinksolutions9659
    @thinksolutions9659 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The way he looks @ her priceless

  • @Princessfrmalmighty
    @Princessfrmalmighty ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I'm single but I do desire to be married oneday and I'm learning from this and taking notes in Jesus name.

  • @lovetistrue
    @lovetistrue ปีที่แล้ว +15

    This is really good! "You marry the history!" So, true! I grew up in a fatherless household and my Husband grew up with two parent household. So this is very relatable to us. But what I've learned also even if you come from a two parent household doesn't always mean both parents model a "godly" example for the child. Also, doesn't mean the household has a stable foundation is what I meant. My husband didn't really start going to church really consistently until we were dating. We dated for 5 years, got engaged - 2 years, and then we been married for 10 years+. Our relationship has grown so much spiritually we've learned so much about ourselves what we didn't even notice before like you've both said, "You marry the history". Just things that might have been unintentional we've said or done but not really realizing where the root of it all stemmed from. So, we thought we knew each other while we were dating but not to the extent of being married and living in the same household together. Since we both come from different households. Although, I come from a single parent home and he comes from both parents at home we've learned to listen and hear each out when we're communicating with each another and showing "grace upon grace", "forgiveness", and setting our home with godly principals for us to live by because were raising our very own children which is the example we should be teaching our children to model so they can continue a godly legacy that will carry own to generations to generations (being fruitful and multiplying).

    • @gracegrace4734
      @gracegrace4734 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Great comment, that's what it's all about, leaving a godly legacy. Regardless if you come from a single parent home or a two parent home if your marriage honors God's word, wives, submit to your own husbands as unto the Lord. Therefore just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her. Your marriage will be blessed by honoring God's word. Ladies, let your husband's lead your family, let God bless your submission.

  • @mrsheatherteske
    @mrsheatherteske 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    My relationship with my dad was like your wife. It's so true you marry the history.

  • @ADHTube
    @ADHTube ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you Jonathan and Kanika. May God continually bless your marriage and family.

  • @laurenbaah5384
    @laurenbaah5384 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Thank you for opening up your family to others. It's soooo important for people in our culture to observe examples of God's intention for marriage and relationships in general and the safety, healing, and honor God's intentions bring. Praise Him for his goodness to and for us!

  • @dovetales3
    @dovetales3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Yes, our environment molds us but make no error in thought, God does not make mistakes. You get what you need, when you need it so you can grow in faith. And faith works by love. God ain’t interested in nothing else. If you are grateful for everything, you get more of everything. Like Paul said, this thorn was GOOD for me!

  • @sarahfranks901
    @sarahfranks901 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    WOW your wife has a very similar story to me. Listening to her thought process gave me understanding on part of why I am the way I am.
    When a parent disappoints you. You grow up feeling like you have to do everything to protect yourself

  • @shevivasworld9299
    @shevivasworld9299 ปีที่แล้ว

    Gosh I feel so broken watching this because it so relatable . I’m 22 and an only child of my mum single mum she never remarried . My Father is deadbeat never supported and wasn’t in the picture while I was growing up. I didn’t grow up with siblings . I only pray to God to give me good husband to compensate me and fill all the empty spaces in my heart .

  • @AAA34FL448
    @AAA34FL448 ปีที่แล้ว

    The undivided attention you give to each other in this video is a beautiful thing. Full respect for the others responses. Keep loving and living. I'm so glad I found your channel, I truly love listening to your father as well. Beautiful couple!

  • @pJunies11
    @pJunies11 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Ooo I’m definitely gonna be turned in ! You know I’ve heard that saying. Your not just marrying the person but also the family. I’ve not heard your marring the history . But it makes soo much sense, now that y’all have said it. So many arguments could have been avoided if we looked at it this way. We will be better for this message! Thank y’all!

  • @TWilliams88
    @TWilliams88 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    It’s so good to hear from Kanika! We’ve interacted briefly on a few occasions but I had no idea our backgrounds paralleled so much! Understanding, appreciating and embracing your spouses history is a significant key! Thanks for the lesson. Love ya’ll!

  • @selammelaku8021
    @selammelaku8021 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    You guys are amazing partners sharing your own experience!
    Thank you!

  • @misscychilds
    @misscychilds ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I love how real and transparent they are... great content. I am enjoying these segment. It's wonderful to hear from a couple who puts God God first.🙏🏽❤

  • @jkkroch
    @jkkroch ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Ahhh man, I love this! So good! I am living in another country at the moment doing cross cultural ministry and communication is so important. Though, we so need help with this 🙏 because the way we communicate and the cues we use can be so different. You really have to seek to be like Paul in 1 cor 9 and "become all things to all people". Maybe that's what it means to salt all your words with grace. Thanks for being real and glorifying the Lord through your reliance on Him!

  • @DDJones-yi1pm
    @DDJones-yi1pm ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Why do Jon-Jon and Kanika look like brother and sister?❤
    You both always bring wisdom, insightfulness, wisdom and perspective. Thank you!!🙏🏽

  • @mbwolf7620
    @mbwolf7620 ปีที่แล้ว

    Well, she and I share the same story about the absent father who couldn’t keep commitments. Up went the walls of protection that cause dysfunction you don’t realize you need to resolve.
    Thanks for sharing.

  • @sharonadams4430
    @sharonadams4430 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great discussion. I’m 64 and never thought about this, yet I’ve been hoping to remarry. Good job 👏🏽

  • @InspiredbyBarbNatifu
    @InspiredbyBarbNatifu หลายเดือนก่อน

    Jonathan is a warm and bubbly person and a joy to listen to. Has a bit of Priscilla's bubbly personality...me thinks. God bless you both, you complement each other.❤❤

  • @kennethhowell1272
    @kennethhowell1272 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Really cool seeing the different backgrounds that you two brought into your marriage. I would imagine after Kanika felt comfortable being part of the Evans family it was a win win situation, as she now could identify how traditional family feels like while still retaining a relationship with her friends.

  • @chloelageaux769
    @chloelageaux769 ปีที่แล้ว

    Awesome! Yes, our history does have an affect on our other relationships. I can definitely agree with the consistency and reciprocation because I'm the same way; This is definitely a result of continuously being disappointed.

  • @clarissaadjei4272
    @clarissaadjei4272 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Never would have known you were older! You're gorgeous!!! Great segment. 💗

  • @Lucysquad
    @Lucysquad 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Consistency is key! I'll work on this. I think this is how I fail. Not be Consistent. Consistency equals permanent change.

  • @kathymalone7983
    @kathymalone7983 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I love this. Please continue this. We need this! You guys as a couple teaching. You are a easy listen. It’s so good to understand . Thank you guys. Look forward to more❤️❤️❤️

  • @melbaknowlton
    @melbaknowlton ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is so needed for people who aspire to be married and for married couples and even in the dating phase!

  • @giftsonyou501
    @giftsonyou501 ปีที่แล้ว

    Inconsistency happens when it comes to me when there no communications. I'll wait but after time I'll step back. I don't force anybody.

  • @she-whoempow-rzz6562
    @she-whoempow-rzz6562 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    TY FOR BEING TRANSPARENT & CARING TO HELP US WITH UR TESTIMONIES. PLS DON'T STOP!!!

  • @jessicagreen4555
    @jessicagreen4555 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Good stuff! This is why it's important to develop a friendship before you jump into a relationship. History does matter in helping you to understand and deal with your significant other. You've gained a new follower in me... Subscribing now.

  • @carlalexander6121
    @carlalexander6121 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks 🙏🏾 you guys for your help and willingness to be open to us married parents who are on this journey with God!! Love you Jonathan!! Great brother to hear from every Sunday morning at OCBF

  • @urechi
    @urechi ปีที่แล้ว

    I love it. So true. There is a the reality for people who didn't grow up with both parents at all due to loss/death. I would really look forward to people exploring this Conversation.

  • @sherwinhiltonjr
    @sherwinhiltonjr ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Another Great message! My wife and I sat and watched this together and we really appreciated the perspective of both husband and wife and that of past and present!

  • @constancegriffin2548
    @constancegriffin2548 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is so True and SO IMPORTANT! It's not taught or talked about enough, so thank you guys so much for sharing what The LORD has given you! GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY! 💓

  • @marlenemichel297
    @marlenemichel297 ปีที่แล้ว

    THIS BLESSED ME! THANK YOU ALL for this ministry and intentionality for the next generation of KINGDOM marriages to be as GOD WILLS!

  • @jdward45
    @jdward45 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great conversation you 2. God bless your union and families 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿

  • @theparttimehomemaker
    @theparttimehomemaker ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love this- history is so important!

  • @rauleus
    @rauleus ปีที่แล้ว

    This is Soo good. We have to "KNOW& UNDERSTAND" the History.

  • @Improvemypronunciation
    @Improvemypronunciation ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This is so helpful! Looking forward to the other ones 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

  • @SweetNeece23
    @SweetNeece23 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    first video I have ever seen by you, i am sooo grateful youtube recommended it to me!!! i really loved it! 🥰

  • @sandraarreola9601
    @sandraarreola9601 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Oh my yessss more episodes please thank u so much. This helps in so many ways. My husband and myself love ❤️ seeing u both speaking on truth.

  • @LizaLavolta
    @LizaLavolta ปีที่แล้ว

    These are honestly great guidelines regarding history and expectations that align for friendship as well.

  • @rebeccagounder6932
    @rebeccagounder6932 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great conversation
    So transparent
    God bless you both 🙏🏽

  • @crystalclarity6766
    @crystalclarity6766 ปีที่แล้ว

    I enjoyed the mature, loving and supportive vibes passing back and forth between these obvious lovers. It’s awesome.

  • @Ministeriomujervirtuosa
    @Ministeriomujervirtuosa ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for sharing, even I'm single it's a blessing for me. The Lord bless and save you and your marriage in Yeshuas mighty Name 🙌🏼

  • @robertlaabs5066
    @robertlaabs5066 ปีที่แล้ว

    Beautiful Couple! Thank you for sharing your insights and stories.

  • @zeruiahzeechize2068
    @zeruiahzeechize2068 ปีที่แล้ว

    The way she completes his sentences shows how they complete each other

  • @En2Hair
    @En2Hair ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love the transparency. It makes things so much more relatable! Thank you both for sharing, and I'm looking forward to what's to come!

  • @adlysahollis5447
    @adlysahollis5447 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you. This was so good. I’m glad you are continuing to unpack and teach this. When I think about expectations, they are a non- verbal idea, but we operate as if we have share that thought or idea with our spouses. I’m on the edge of my seat waiting for the next session.

  • @getyourlife
    @getyourlife ปีที่แล้ว

    Great topic..beautiful couple! I wish Kanika would have spoken a little louder...whew she has a testimony, so many women can relate to the absent father situation.

  • @Mochadee2003
    @Mochadee2003 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thanks for sharing. Such a great topic this should be discussed in pre marriage counseling. ❤ it.

    • @JonathanBlakeEvans
      @JonathanBlakeEvans  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      We definitely agree! Thank you for watching and supporting!

  • @thewhisperofgod2843
    @thewhisperofgod2843 ปีที่แล้ว

    Single but It’s so interesting so I’m taking notes ! Thanks for sharing 🙌🏽

  • @renostubbs8504
    @renostubbs8504 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is an extremely healthy take for a important topic.
    I hope that you guys continue to grow and learn about each other in the spirit of HOLINESS IN CHRIST.
    This young woman seems to have a lot on her mind,she is definitely a benefit to many young women seeking to get married. Thanks a lot bro,for sharing this video,if I had saw this channel a few years ago,I probably wouldn't be leaving this message, knowing parts each others history goes a long way in marriage and relationships

  • @roslenewest
    @roslenewest ปีที่แล้ว

    Wooowwww!!! Good information! Things I understood, but in a different way. I didn't fight for this to be clear in my marriage and thus so much damage has been done that may be reversible. Thank you for sharing the knowledge.

  • @izion515
    @izion515 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is so so good!!! Thank you both

  • @mosadikobe4110
    @mosadikobe4110 ปีที่แล้ว

    Yall are so refreshingly inlove.we dont see that these days.I love it.thanx for this🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

  • @oneof7billion627
    @oneof7billion627 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank yall. I'm receiving.

  • @sbrina_diva8112
    @sbrina_diva8112 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Always insightful knowledge from both of you as a couple. Leading by example 👍🏽👍🏽. You know there is no life book for us to study besides the true word n so many of us have found ourselves learning hard lessons as we go along. Some succeed & some not😅But through it all we learn valuable lessons. I’ve learnt in life thus far, that we live by choice n sometimes the choices we make can impact us for the good or for the bad. But I encourage us all to keep pressing on in our relationships n allow the Father to be present & the centre Always, So that his will be done despite our choices, He can work All things out for our good n to Glorify Him 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽.. Keep sharing your story, you never know who it will help. Congratulations on striving to be the best version of you (both). Look forward to more conversations on this subject 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽. Blessings

  • @she-whoempow-rzz6562
    @she-whoempow-rzz6562 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    NOW I'M 64 CONTINUING TO PREPARE & HEAL FOR MY FUTURE HEALTHY CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE. IT MKS A DIFFERENCE WHEN U DISOBEY & MARRY SOMEONE WHEN ABBA TELLS U NOT TO. I WAS NOT HEALTHY/EDUCATED ENUF FOR AN INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP, ESP MARRIAGE. I HADN'T HEALED FRM PAST TRAUMAS THAT STARTED N CHILDHOOD!

  • @therippleeffect1983
    @therippleeffect1983 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great talk and so brave of you to put you out like that 💯❤️😍

  • @tarikabennett6451
    @tarikabennett6451 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love these two…always helpful information lining up with the word of God.

  • @noble604
    @noble604 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for this conversation. It’s much needed. The topic is helpful and nicely done but it was kind of lopsided. It was presented as your wife was the one lacking with no corresponding lack from your side. Even though your family was intact, your family was grounded, consistent and whole, we know no family on earth is perfect. It’s probably not easy to share some of the imperfections within your own family when it’s a “famous” family and you want to respect your parents and we’re aware of the people involved but let’s not discuss it as your wife as the only broken one. I’m sure there are issues that she married into that she’s dealing with the same on her side -- just in another version. She might not say it but you can acknowledge your own family dynamic. Blessings to you all. You do have a beautiful family. You’re such a blessing. I appreciate the message. 🕊

  • @roekinn
    @roekinn ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is great! What might be some helpful questions couples could ask one another to get this conversation rolling?

  • @tinaf600
    @tinaf600 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is so good. I wish more couples understood this. I know my husband struggles with this when it comes to our marriage. He says he understands, but his actions doesn't show that he understands. One day at a time. We will get there with the help of our Lord and Savior Jesus 🙏

  • @kinder7513
    @kinder7513 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love this! This has opened my eyes and helped me to understand some things about myself and my expectations in relationships. Thank you both!

  • @maryburrell9555
    @maryburrell9555 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was really good! I truly enjoyed it and looking forward for more❤

  • @cpittman1527
    @cpittman1527 ปีที่แล้ว

    this is soooooo gud...yes, you marry the history AND then some! great nugget...blessings!

  • @arainaweemes6234
    @arainaweemes6234 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great insight! Thanks for sharing. 🙏🏾👍🏾❤️

  • @ruachnaim0305
    @ruachnaim0305 ปีที่แล้ว

    God Bless You Both! May the LORD CONTINUE to bless you, your family, and EVERYTHING attached to you. 🙏🏽🙌🏽
    I Bless You Kanika. ❤
    We serve a God of restoration, One that brings beauty from the ashes of our lives. ❤

  • @theejonesradioshowfeatshar753
    @theejonesradioshowfeatshar753 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for this I needed this so much.

  • @agag4866
    @agag4866 ปีที่แล้ว

    Awesome content! God bless the both of you! I learned something very valuable that has never been said to me before.

  • @Stellathediamond
    @Stellathediamond ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for sharing these gems❤️❤️

  • @sheilasmith3123
    @sheilasmith3123 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I found this out to late in life three failed marriages later😢.

  • @Timber1205
    @Timber1205 ปีที่แล้ว

    The title says it all!! Great conversation!

  • @rosalindprayerwarrior4987
    @rosalindprayerwarrior4987 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you Mr.and Mrs. Evans for sharing.

  • @sallykabukuru1638
    @sallykabukuru1638 ปีที่แล้ว

    What a great message!

  • @elgansika
    @elgansika ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So instructive 👏🏾🙏🏾

  • @resawhit2478
    @resawhit2478 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is gold.

  • @julietmujumba6094
    @julietmujumba6094 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You both look amazing 😍

  • @caleb.p93
    @caleb.p93 ปีที่แล้ว

    I appreciate you all sharing.

  • @Mutsa
    @Mutsa ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for sharing, this helps a lot.

  • @Joce-bl7qi
    @Joce-bl7qi ปีที่แล้ว

    Kanika is a beautiful woman. Brimming with depth and many facets.

  • @Sharelle_Johnson
    @Sharelle_Johnson ปีที่แล้ว

    Love it, so insightful!! Looking forward to the upcoming videos. Continued Blessings!

  • @nadiamcintosh2736
    @nadiamcintosh2736 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    For me this is the wall that I have up. Im not close to my family, and I have some past history and so in my mind I’m like Lord is my future husband going to run? But there is nothing too hard God!

  • @drbrianahampton
    @drbrianahampton ปีที่แล้ว

    So good! Thank you for sharing🙏🏾🙏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

  • @n.4225
    @n.4225 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for this one!
    We have to take care for the history of our partner and sometimes also reflect our own reactions to our behavior (Witz eyes on our own history)
    I‘m also older than my husband 😂😉

  • @LaetisBeauty
    @LaetisBeauty ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video; the music is a bit too loud, please reduce it next time😉

  • @tashab1628
    @tashab1628 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for sharing this!

  • @msdee2905
    @msdee2905 ปีที่แล้ว

    My first and second husband came from 2 parent households. My first husband cheated and I think his Dad cheated but his mom didn’t leave because she had 8 kids. Neither one of my husbands valued wife and family although they came from a “stable” 2 parent home.

  • @Swest1
    @Swest1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Awesome!!!

  • @terilyntucker4361
    @terilyntucker4361 ปีที่แล้ว

    LOVE you guys! This was awesome...as always!

  • @joycesamuel9610
    @joycesamuel9610 ปีที่แล้ว

    thank you. that was helpful!

  • @saramarotto8466
    @saramarotto8466 ปีที่แล้ว

    Really good content and excellent presentation.

  • @sendingloveandlight140
    @sendingloveandlight140 ปีที่แล้ว

    AWESOME!!!!!!!❤

  • @sandracrawford4733
    @sandracrawford4733 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great information! Thanks so much