I’ve got a favour to ask! If you enjoy this, please double check that you’ve liked the video and subscribed to the channel! Thats a small way you can help us carry on doing this ❤️🙏🏾 really appreciate you!
Just so you know, I watch Steven but don't subscribe for quite a rubbish reason. I take care of my Mum & she watches a lot of YT but she's 88 & couldn't get the sign in & out thing so disturbingly whenever I'd go to watch my feed was full of nothing but Harry & Meghan...pages & pages & pages 🤨 dreadful! So now everyone in the house goes on YT as a Guest. I'm subscribed on my phone but like to watch your show on the telly. I always feel guilty & like I'm nicking your show when you ask us to subscribe!
Fellow divorce attorney here (Pennsylvania and New Jersey). So much of what James is saying about marriage, divorce, and relationships is spot on. I’m really happy there is a platform to get the message out directly from a divorce lawyer’s perspective. Great video!
Divorce is money making business. Why get married? Why don’t you just live together without a label of married or belonging to someone? If you decide to have children why don’t they (2 people) sign a memo of understanding for both to raise that chid or children & have it notarized and presented to justice of peace for a binding contract? Too much nonsense in marriage when two people fall apart. Lawyers like it bc they’re the only one benefit. If you do not agree, proof yourself wrong. Thank you very much.
He is so right. My parents have been married for 29 years and they loved us so much but they were not overly obsessed with their children. They prioritized their relationship, personal identities, careers, and travels together to be the best parents they could be. I love that I still get to have happily married parents to this day ♥️
My husband and i talked before getting married ,we both asked each other if we would prioritise our children above each other. when they were young. We wrote the answer down on a piece of paper and handed it to each other. We both had written YES and we did. He said he couldnt marry someone who wouldnt put our children first and i agreed.We had 35 yrs together before became terminally ill with cancer,it was my and my childrens priviledge to nurse him to the end.I asked him if he regretted anything in his life ,he said no.I think the issue is wether you agree on what your priorities will be.
I have a co worker whom he & his wife prioritized their children first they been married for 45years & he said that’s his only regret, because him & his wife barely know each other they changed over the years, the kids are grown and out the house and barely come visit them
I listened to the podcast… did i miss something or was it one of those “read in between the lines” kind of thing? I don’t remember him saying (and tied even relistening to certain areas) “if kids are your top priority, you’ll divorce “. My take-away was feeding your kids the illusion that he talks about. I know, and have listened to, many podcasts with Jordan Peterson and he’s a strong advocate for long term marriage. Has some VERY strong arguments for it, too. And if you take Sexton’s “the wisdom you find is the one you bring up bring up there” the same issues can follow from one relationship to another unless you work through them. Maybe working through them with the partner you have children with is the solution. But i do understand it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. Every relationship is unique with it own individual challenges.
@nicolegarceau9610 Whoever labeled the podcast insinuated it. In any case, it's a common problem. When the kids grow up and leave home, many marriage partners find they are nearly strangers, because they've thrown all their attention at the kids for 20 years. At this point, many married people decide to split. They have failed to provide an example to their own children of how to maintain love relationship with a spouse.
I watched / listened to this video over the course of 3 days... walking a dog, listening on my breaks... it is a long interview but so rewarding. I have no clue why this was so addictive to watch? Lots of life experience and wisdom there... thank you
This lawyer seems sincere, and transparent about the cases he represented. He has a likeable voice and the topic is of interest to many people. So much to learn from this podcast. I also listen to these types of videos and walk my dog along the coastal paths whiee listening. Dog gets to be outdoors while we focus on interesting engaging topics. Seems fair 🙂 🐶
Marriage slippage is a term that refers to a gradual decline in the quality of a marital relationship over time. It often happens subtly and may involve reduced emotional connection, communication, intimacy, or general engagement between partners. Causes can range from daily life stresses, lack of communication, unmet expectations, or changes in priorities. Without intentional effort to reconnect and address these changes, the relationship may feel strained or distant, though not necessarily ending in separation or divorce.
This man is a philosopher who poses as a VERY VERY GOOD ATTORNEY. lol like his depth and even the way the pitch of his voice switches back and forth has such raw vulnerable honesty. I love this
@@yusufraage8554When I left my ex in the 80’s and divorced, I swore I’d never marry again. All my friends said, “Oh, sure you will. He just wasn’t The One. You’ll find someone else and get married.” Nope. Never did. And I’ve enjoyed my Best Life ever since. 😁👍🏻
This one took me by surprise. I expected to hear about divorce, the process, the mistakes, etc. Instead I sat with tears welling up as James spoke about death and dying. I also learned his mother had leiomyosarcoma. I also have this very rare cancer and have been dealing with it since 2020. I'm Stage 4. Statistically, I'm not supposed to be alive. Thank you James for sharing your stories and perspective. I live in joy and try to 'soften' when things are difficult. Thank you DOAC team for this episode.
@hollyhansomsvillage Blessings to you. It’s a miracle youve made it 4yrs. Wishing you peace, comfort, love. Will say a prayer for you. I hope you’re having a good day today. ☮️ Take care. A sister of mine had leiomyosarcoma~ a spindle cell sarcoma ~ her cancer occurred due to tp53 genetic mutation (which is also called Li Fraumeni syndrome). Turned out this genetic mutation is in our family lineage so then all family were tested to see who else had the genetic mutation. During my sister’s first surgery, she had full hysterectomy, removal of her omentum connective tissue, part of her colon, and bits/pieces off an adrenal gland…. The docs tried to get as large of margins as possible. Anyway, wishing you much strength and all the best.
Sorry to hear that. As you have nothing to lose and as you still enjoy life, maybe go full carnivore, miracles.happen (Dr Berry, Dr Chafee, etc etc ). With love.
I watch his first interview with James yesterday. I have seen it on my feed for at least a week before I watched it. I thought it was just something from the menasphere community. Man was it amazing interview and nothing what I expected it to be
Same i was surprised. My mom is going through brain cancer right now after having lung cancer. This is what I needed to hear right now. Thanks for this episode.
My husband and I prioritize each other over our kids. This looks different in different homes. It means sometimes kids' baths are rushed, and sometimes a bedtime story is brief. Sometimes, they don't get to go to the park. He does shift work, and we prioritize time with each other when we can. We've noticed something. Our kids are happy and healthy ❤️. They are growing up in a home with parents who know each other well, spend time together and are heads over heels for each other. Our home's atmosphere is loving and peaceful. There's something ordinary yet magical about that.
SPOT ON!!!! So why the kids are brats ending up with divorced parents fighting over the kids. Kids see divided parents like a shark smells blood in the water and use it to their full advantage. Because THEY’RE THE KIDS who need united PARENTS teaching them the proper order of things. Failure to do this often leads to grown kids who disdain one or both parents who then estrange them.
That's what happens when a good man knows he's her #1. When a guy is expected to do everything to support her and the family but gets nothing in return, the only thing built is resentment.
This made me cry so much. Thank you. This was life changing experience. I went through the divorce with one husband and I went through the death with the second. I never knew I need to hear this, but now I am looking back to my life differently. The talk about death change my life perspective so much. I am forcing everyone who I love, to watch this interview. Amazing!!!
I am planning a wedding right now for my fiance and I. I became so stressed out when I was trying to do it the "traditional" way, then I threw all of that away and started planning around what WE would want. I am planning the fanciest pizza party anyone has ever been to! Keeping the budget low, and giving space for us to have fun with the people we love most.
Probably the best thing ever ; starting A marriage with Financial stress isn’t a good thing either . The total cost of weddings is absolutely outrageous lately ; it’s lovely to see Couples who are prioritizing what’s best for the two of them Vs taking advice from family or Spending more 🤑 than you initially wanted 💯💯!!! Always follow your intuition !! Best of luck on ya wedding & wishing you two success in your Marriage.
She's a great lawyer and very soulful. Despite being trans, she really took me by surprise about how serious she is and doesn't even make reverence to her trans identity. She's a great role model
This man has really changed my opinion on what I thought divorce lawyers were all like. He's got such a huge heart. I've been married almost 9 years now and going strong. I don't claim to be an expert on marriage at all lol but I can say me and my hubby prioritize each other even though we have 4 kids and we don't forget that it was us two in the beginning that started this family.
How? My kids are little time bandits. (I’m also a stay at home mom), I don’t even get to sleep without one of them or both of them on my side of the bed. In 6 years we’ve had like 12-13 dates without the kids. I’m the one who makes every meal, does every bath, gets them dressed, takes them to school, clean when they leave. How do ppl not fall into this.
@@trevnti We've got 4 kids and we've never let them sleep in our bed so it's just not something they even want to do or think about at all. And I do all of that stuff too during the week when my hubby works but on weekends he pitches in and helps me out. We've had a system for years now (his idea) that on weekends we split up the days so that both of us get to relax. I do breakfast with the kids and lunch while he relaxes in the bedroom with his video games, then in the evening he does dinner and everything after with the kids while I get to relax in the bedroom reading and watching TH-cam (which I'm doing right now lol). Yeah some weekends there's too much going on to pull it off, but most weekends are chill and we manage. It makes both of us happier and more appreciative of the other when we can have that relax time to ourselves. Then when the kids are in their beds asleep, we have our adult time. The smaller kids (7 and 8) go to bed at 9 and the teens stay in their rooms anyways so we get a couple hours of alone time before bed. You just have to set up systems to make it work!
@@madsquishy3410you are a very thoughtful couple, congrats, it’s good to see parents working as a good and efficient team, really insightful and inspiring 🧚🏼♀️
You guys made that choice to have only 12 dates in 6 years. Its your job to get the babies to a sitter and budget for it if not and there are budget constraints then at least do dates at home when the kids are asleep and dont let the kids run you you have to change your whole family dynamic for it to work
Agreed. Steven is great bc he lets people talk. I hope Steven didn't let this guy talk him out of getting married bc he never addressed the 42% who actually stay married and presumably are happy. Why does he assume Steven will fall into the 58%? If you're worried, get a prenup. If ur not worried, get a prenup. Sometimes u gotta take risks in life.
After Diary of CEO it’s really difficult to listen to podcasts with guests as just often yap and interrupt, and insert a million filler words and hums. I can’t unnotice that. Steven is an excellent host and lets his guests take the stage.
@@motogirlz101I thought the same, but I reminded myself that Steven is a great host because he listens to understand, and he hears a TON of different opinions that he may or may not agree with, and all spoken by people who are very passionate and experienced in their fields. I assume hosts like him have a great ability to compartmentalize and set internal boundaries to not let a guest’s opinion change their beliefs and values.
I think James is by far my favorite guest on any podcast. His eloquence, his wit, his sense of humor - coupled with a wonderful depth of wisdom and live experience. So happy this conversation was as long as it was; it felt like it blew by in 1 hour. \
This lawyer has a degree in psycholgy. He is also an excellent performer. He is acting all the time. His body language, his voice, the way he uses his gestures, he is amazing. He even cries. The perfect combination to be a succesful lawyer in the US.
@@tatatat-vm9dl I was married to a guy like this. He could cry on queue. Sometimes had me believing it but deep down I was sceptical. However because I didn't fake cry I thought other people didn't. My life has been filled with fake liars. I believed them. I didn't realise people just make 💩up all day long? I have noticed that people do it on podcasts especially if the person they talk about is dead........
So you don’t believe in the story he shares about his mother contemplating mortality most of her life due to her Cancer diagnosis. Your judgement may be flawed I think 💭; but that’s your Opinion!!! He’s educating us in Appreciating the life we got now ; appreciating the simple things in life ; b’coz one day some day ; we’ll be all Gone 🤷🏿🤷🏿. I highly doubt that he’s putting on A performance.
I got the same performative vibe from him and I was just listening… he’s a bit much, blaming the judge for letting him win and how many times he had to repeat “I was just doing my job!” Then saying the system failed that abused woman and in the next breath saying he has to trust the system. Yikes. I’m outta here after the first 15 minutes.
Man I could listen to this guy ALL day, just so much wisdom and experience oozing from James that I always walk away with a more understanding of life and myself. Love him!
When he used the metaphor about the broken tea cup and living the reality, it resonated with a popular saying from my Country (Brazil) "work with what you have for today" . Don't know if it makes sense in English, but it does mean to accept your reality and live the present, doing what you can with what you have now, without passively waiting for "when things get better".
Challenges in relationships are part of the journey, but there’s always a way to move forward. My own marriage had significant hurdles, but with the right help, my wife and I overcame them and grew stronger. With effort and cooperation, solutions can be found. Keep your hope-solutions are within reach.
Parting with someone you love is always a challenging process, but in my experience, I had the guidance of a spiritual guide who prevented my marriage from collapsing. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
Love this comment!!💞 Please don't miss out on your perfect one..because of this opinion. It's exactly that an opinion. Especially the part on marraige is dangerous.
A divorce attorney with a heart! I didn't think that was possible. Always impressed with James' eloquent human insights and life wisdom, spoken with occasional inconvenient unfettered truth but with noble and kind intentions.
The fact that he has a HEART makes him more dangerous if hes your opponent because if his HEART is in his client's case, he'll feel divine justice for tearing your ass open legally. 😂
I solved all my relationship problems in my mid 40's when I decided to follow celibacy, and amazingly everything just fell into place. My life as a middle aged man blossomed, I didn't realise just how emotionally draining it was trying to please others, but mostly my own desires! Truly, if you conquer lust, attachment and dependency, life is sooooo much more rewarding and you feel a sense of self-sovereignty.
I learned that the only person you will have a relationship with your entire life is yourself. You need to do everything you can to preserve that relationship. If you lose that, you can say goodbye to all your other relationships. Whether it's your partner, children, parents, etc. you need to make your relationship with yourself the #1 focus. People tend to lose that focus, and then it weakens their relationship with others.
My parents have a successful 37 year marraige. Selecting well is definitely number one, and someone on the same level as you as far as values and goals. They both worked alot growing up but what kept their relationship going I think was all the projects they did together. Restoring our victorian era house to magazine quality, building gardens, working on rental properties and they don't get distracted by other people and spending tons of time going out etc. The momentum built generational wealth, they saw a bigger picture than just day to day pleasure.
@Martin-rh7mf y the rental is recent within the past two years. It's a cottage so it’s the painting the decorating and hearing about people enjoying their stay is what it’s about for them. Working on a project together then seeing the fruit of it. I’m sure if it was a residential property It would be more of a headache.
Love this! My bf and I plan to do the same. He’s a really estate broker and investor. I’m a doctor . We’re holding off on marriage until a few more years but want to build in this same way.
I’m happy for you that your parents grew and changed in the same direction throughout their marriage. Some other couples went through exactly the same things like kids, work, home renovations and rentals, but they grew apart instead.
No #1 relationship advisor .. can point out truths speaker .. And his name is also *JAMES SEXTON*.. he’s really very intelligent .. & we all .. can learn lots from this man .. he’s so Truthful and fun to listen to ..
I love James. I've watched so many podcasts with him. His outlook aligns so closely with mine. I am very fortunate to have an ex-husband I get along great with and our kids are better for it. We've honestly worked harder being great co-parents than we did being partners in marriage. Which is unfortunate that we didn't see that at the time. But I am so so grateful that we found our friendship again through the rubble of our broken marriage.
Same here. He just spoke out on all the muddled thoughts I have circulating in my head on a daily basis. We get to a certain age where we experience loss, some heavier than others, and it can be difficult to try and understand it all.
I agree with you. I found it easier to re-build the friendship outside of our marriage, than within it. Also, a longshot and slightly creepy of me to ask, but I feel like we've spoken before... Kalina is that you? If not, I'm sorry. Your profile reminds me of someone I used to talk to.
I'm a hospice nurse going through a divorce and WOW. James is totally captivating. His energy and everything he says very much resonates, from openness about death to his Zen quotes. This is a VERY intriguing convo. Thank you.
Hospice Care can be difficult if you're not prepared for the reality of someone dying, but it can be so rewarding & a privilege to be with someone when they pass away. This guy is so real. ❤
So glad you had him back. I really enjoy his forthrightness, intelligence, and passion. People need to know it's okay to be unmarried! It's great if you have a wonderful marriage, but it's also great to be happily single. We don't receive the "happily single" message much in our culture, though. James puts critical thinking behind the proposition of marriage, questioning the default response we're brainwashed to have about what happily ever after looks like. A conversation between Steven and James is gold. Thanks, guys!
James Sexton and Johann Hari are my favorite guests on your show. Jim is a delight to listen to and has wonderful insights not only on relationships, but on life, death and authenticity. I'm not one to comment on podcasts or really any kind of post, but this one is special. I laugh and I cry every time you have Jim on and I always learn something. You are, of course, a wonderful host and ask the questions we wish we could ask and actually let your guest answer - what a concept. Thanks for the excellent work you do!
I am very happy with the great words Steve/Steven said to James by the end because they do serve him justice of appreciation. The reason that James has been on the rise is not because he is a divorce lawyer (How many divorce lawyers are there?); it's because of the immense insight and wisdom he has as well as the courage and audacity to go out and say what he believes. Also, he's a tremendously great speaker and communicator, just able to keep your attention without ever boring you. James, you're a pleasure to have around.
I've just found James Sexton. He is saying everything that resonates with me. He has earned much wisdom that is needed for many ears to hear. Thank you James! He is incredibly timeless and down to earth and relevant. I would love to be friends!
love how philosophical and insightful this LAWYER is! seriously this is the messages the world needs. the perspctives that people lack to promote more peace
“I’m a lawyer” would be such an understatement of an intro if you were to meet this man. Best guest ever on this show. Chainsaw in one hand, beautiful flower in the other and loving it both.
Re Jame's suggestion: Forty odd years ago, after our first anniversary dinner, I suggested a walk along the beach and during that walk I set forth the idea to make this a yearly check in, by sharing a few things that annoyed us and a few things we appreciated about each other. I thought this was very grown up and a way to keep in touch with how each of us was feeling. Unfortunately, my husband was horrified and shut me down so fast we ended up fighting. Needless to say the marriage did not survive despite going on to have three children. It obviously requires both partners to be open enough to hear good and uncomfortable truths about themselves and how to offer that to in exchange. Moral of the story - choose wisely. 🙏 to your guest. I feel, at last, validated in what I was hoping to achieve and wish others more success than i had.
Thank you for sharing your experience. Outside looking in, respectfully I think you may have opened that conversation with the best of intentions but the worst in execution. Why an annual check in? Why not a monthly, or biweekly, or quarterly frequency? I imagine your ex-husband heard the opening to the conversation as “Let’s take 1 day a year to voice our grievances with one another that we’ve compiled in the last year” and that may have been very off putting for him. But to your credit, he also sounds like he did not ask for further clarification and immediately got defensive, which may mean either (1) this was a really important topic for him that he felt you two were at odds, or that (2) he heard what he heard and that was good enough for him (sense of immaturity). Either way, sorry to hear about your separation but it sounds like it might have been for the best.
Oof. I almost burst into tears. I lost my rescue a few years ago and my boyfriend at the time got me a new pup immediately after. It was a dog he knew I always wanted, but I couldn’t believe him. I loved my rescue Bella deeply. Losing her really broke my heart. I thought I was betraying her by having Coco. Fast forward to today, my Coco is glued to me & I love her so much! I would have never had HER had I not lost Bella. It’s bittersweet and tough to explain, but it’s life.
It's just so enjoyable to listen to James gush about the things he loves and to hear the emotions in his voice regarding challenging situations he's faces. Such a passionate storyteller. Fabulous content. Great Life Lessons. Thank you!
Omg - when he said - this person has been loaned to you does not belong to you. You need to water the plant can’t keep walking by and not water the plant and except this person is yours. He’s really real. Truly enjoyed it all. Super hard convos. Different perspectives.
This is crazy because I only found the original interview last week (and subsequently this channel) and there's already a follow up! Incredible content as ever. I very much appreciate hearing James's point of view about divorce and loss and love. So very refreshing from someone with years worth of experience. Thank you for another great interview!
James insights on relationships and marriage have seriously changed my whole perspective. As a young woman who isn’t married, I didn’t expect a divorce lawyer to have such an impact, but the way he breaks things down is just incredible. I’ve watched a lot of interview he’s done and am devouring his book-his wisdom is something I can’t get enough of. Honestly, it’s time for James to have his own podcast! Whether it’s solo or even just a quick 10-minute episode, I’d be all in. So grateful there’s a second interview-just hoping for way more of him in the future! 🥰
@@marnevantonder83 True, a divorce lawyer isn’t a marriage expert, but here’s why I find James Sexton’s advice priceless: his insights go way beyond divorce. He talks about gratitude, real appreciation for the little things, and making sure your partner feels valued daily-like leaving a small note or noticing their efforts. He emphasizes healthy communication, avoiding those sitcom-style complaints to friends, and resolving issues directly instead of letting resentment build. In his stories, even small things-like the ‘BJ’s and granola’ story-show how neglecting tiny gestures can start chipping away at a marriage long before any downfall. He isn’t telling us how to be married; he’s sharing what makes them break down and reminding us how vital these small acts of love are to keep them strong. That’s the kind of advice everyone in a relationship can benefit from, married or not. I am just a fan of his insights tbh. 🌸🌸
@@havealavalyday543 he deals with broken marriages, not good ones. He doesn't know what the good ones look like. He himself is divorced and doesn't necessarily believe in marriage.
I was SOOO thrilled to see him again on the show! His first episode profoundly changed my life and led me to divorce, best decision ever made, despite the sadness. This episode resonated with me, again, in so many ways. I love his advice at the end - paying attention to him, her and we. I can’t wait to read his book and to see him invited again… I could listen to this man forever! THANK YOU
The duality of the person this guy genuinely is and the profession he found himself in is wild. He refers to himself as a weapon, a chainsaw. But on the other side of the coin is one of the most thoughtful, intelligent and intentionally speaking person I’ve heard in so long. It’s a confusing dichotomy but I’m here for every second.
Absolutely value James for his views. This man for a divorce specialist knows the important aspects of love. Thank you James for your input on the world
The keys to a happy marriage are making sure spending time with your wife is a top priority. Also making sure you selected well to begin with- connection >lust. Also never forget to keep up the things you did to win over your spouse in the beginning .
sounds life happy wife happy life bs. how about just finding a woman that has morals and values. it's not a man's job to play into a woman's follies. a man's job is to provide and protect.
Yeah but providing means giving a lot of ur money, nah mate don’t do that…. Yous are a team, we all work now, believe it or not…. Women work too!! Hahahaha so guess what?? Yes we can buy them things but they can do this too, yes!! We can shout dinner or gifts, etc but they can too!!!
Wow! I had so much stuff to do this morning but I sat down to watch this with my morning coffee and just couldn’t stop! This chap is so interesting, charismatic and insightful! I’m going through a divorce just now and so much resonated, but mostly I just kept listening because he’s a fascinating and inspiring human being
My favorite guest so far! I could listen to him all day and the fact that Steve almost had a 3-hour in-depth convo with him only shows that he enjoys listening to him too. James has been such an eye opener on topics that we mostly run away from. Keep up the great work Steve; your Kenyan fan here! ❤️☺️
This guy is entertaining for sure, everything he says is so true and relatable, divorce lawyer must be the best profession as you'll never run out of work!!
I exclusively use TH-cam as my”social media” resource, and I have to say pretty much every content creator asks/pleas for likes and subscribing. Mostly it is rather annoying especially when they repeat the ask throughout the vid. YOU, however, I hit like and subscribe on my first watch. I usually take a few episodes to decide about a channel, but I knew right away you are a quality content facilitator. Someone who lets others shine in his presence and actually brings the better light out. You seem to be a kind, compassionate man, a very intuitive interviewer. You also seem to “read the room” well. You listen to your audience. You care about your content. It feels very personal to me. Not that my opinion matters, but in general, I see so many people only comment when something is wrong. I like to take notice when something is right! Well done.
Its true life is a game you cant win! James is so insightful! I have always truly believed people marry for the wrong reasons.Convention,companionship,family expectations but rarely because the truly love each other and are compatible.Such an interesting compassionate man!
I loved this show!!! This man has so much passion in his teachings he had me focused the entire time. I’m going through relationship issues and dealing with aging parents and facing thoughts of dealing with death as well. Even so I cared for seniors for years, it’s not easier. He’s brilliant and you Sir have wonderful and meaningful deep questions for guests !love it!
Jim is an exceptionally intelligent and intriguing combination of a psychologist, a lawyer, and an experienced storytelling beast! As a never-before married woman, after listening to the podcast, I will no longer feel the sense of inadequacy that the world throws at some of us who, for one reason or another, decided not to add to the 56% of failed marriages! I knowwwwww so many who have completely lost their identity and are practically stuck in this social construct. Marriage is not necessarily meant for everyone.
Thanks. I needed this. I've never met a man with an perspective so ridiculously close to mine. I started thinking I'm the freak with no place in this world with my opinion about marriage and love. Almost crying seeing in comments how many people actually agree with that.
Wonderful conversation. I loved your first interview with James. He is passionate about his work. His narration is simple yet full of wisdom and meaning. I could listen to him talk all day.
11:11 The story Mr. Sexton shared which broke his heart, toward the end he said it was not a good day, and that he might not believe in his clients but that he has to believe in the system. He also said that the victim of his client who was poor should not have lost. but like, poor people are typically targets of those who have more resources, more money. Thats a systemic flaw. As I understand it it is incredibly hard to have a good outcome in these scenarios of perpetrator vs, under resourced, abused, survivor who is also a co-parent. Ive heard it argued that the system keeps the system this way. I hope this guy becomes inspired to advocate for a change to the system he says he has to believe in.
He is right about social media. People who usually post their Happy Life really are not happy, this goes for marriage, wealth, or success. They are not getting their dopamine and are looking for other people to reach out to compliment them. These photos are usually to convince themselves more than anything.
Thank you Steven for bringing him back❤ The previous episode with him was your best podcast ever this guy is awesome on so many levels, cannot wait to watch!!
I have learned sooo... much in this podcast and realized how naive we are about relationships and jumps into marraiges with beeing with this idea of everything will workout fine .🤔😏 This was truly the most sensable teaching about life as it should be. I hope this man opens a school to teach people about humanity in truth and wisdom to make families holesame and meaningfull. GREAT STUFF.!!
Absolute favourite guest on this podcast - open, direct, honest and I love the way he speaks. Incredibly engaging and captivating. The episodes on which he is on are the ones I even downloaded to be able to rewatch when on the underground. ❤ gives such a positive outlook on love, life, death and moving forward despite uncertainty.
I so needed this episode after getting separated, with children involved. This episode reminds me that life has to be taken with humour and lightness to overcome difficult moments. Thank you❤
Wow, this lawyer is on a whole different level! His expressive mimics and gestures, along with his deep level of awareness, kept me hooked. So much wisdom and life experience is thrown at us. I couldn’t stop watching!
Best channel on TH-cam, hands down! Interesting guests and good host, lots of thoughts provoking conversations. Big thank you to the team behind these videos, you are all amazing!
Thank you for guesting him again in your show❤ He is one of my most favorites! Full of wisdom, love for life, and at the same time so much understanding and respect for death and endings❤
The first time I ran into this channel was with James first interview with Steven. Since then I’ve been a hardcore fan of this channel and James. This 2nd interview brought me great joy and I wish this man nothing but happiness and grace!
I can't help but fall more in love 😍with this guy every time I hear him speak. He's wicked intelligent, an independent thinker (which I absolutely love), compassionate & passionate (love that too), insightful, wise, in touch with his feelings, articulate, and nice to look at too lol. I have always believed in life partnership but questioned marriage and I feel validated every time I listen to James. Thank you Steven for having James on and for the quality content that you guys created🤗. I will definitely be looking for the book! 🤓
Please don't allow your emotions to become so naive. Your gushing over someone you don't know and I'm sorry to say but females of this mindset are usually suseptible to falling for the wrong men because they are easily played.
3:30 - the 2 things that made the most impact from last interview was James love for his dog and his guidance about prenups. SO EXCITED JAMES IS BACK ON SCREEN!
I’ve got a favour to ask! If you enjoy this, please double check that you’ve liked the video and subscribed to the channel! Thats a small way you can help us carry on doing this ❤️🙏🏾 really appreciate you!
Steven, you have spoken with so many people. Have you spoken to, and with, our father God? And our brother Jesus? 🙏🏽💟
I’ve already seen it. This is the second time you are posting it
Stevens face at those cutaways show trailers. Priceless!
Just so you know, I watch Steven but don't subscribe for quite a rubbish reason. I take care of my Mum & she watches a lot of YT but she's 88 & couldn't get the sign in & out thing so disturbingly whenever I'd go to watch my feed was full of nothing but Harry & Meghan...pages & pages & pages 🤨 dreadful! So now everyone in the house goes on YT as a Guest.
I'm subscribed on my phone but like to watch your show on the telly. I always feel guilty & like I'm nicking your show when you ask us to subscribe!
Awesome discussion
This man is my favourite guest you've had on your show. He wears his heart on his sleeve. Absolutely gorgeous human being!
soulful
so true! gorgeous!
I agree with you completely. His face says it all. I wish more humans could express themselves like him.
And absolutely brilliant
Agreed!!!
Fellow divorce attorney here (Pennsylvania and New Jersey). So much of what James is saying about marriage, divorce, and relationships is spot on. I’m really happy there is a platform to get the message out directly from a divorce lawyer’s perspective. Great video!
Many of the comments you have posted on a lot of other channels have been great, and thanks for your time, and input you put into commenting!
@ Thank you very much!
If a party motivation to marriage is a better life, I can see why there is no interest for a prenup.
First saw him on Soft White Underbelly 🤍
Divorce is money making business. Why get married? Why don’t you just live together without a label of married or belonging to someone? If you decide to have children why don’t they (2 people) sign a memo of understanding for both to raise that chid or children & have it notarized and presented to justice of peace for a binding contract? Too much nonsense in marriage when two people fall apart. Lawyers like it bc they’re the only one benefit. If you do not agree, proof yourself wrong. Thank you very much.
He is so right. My parents have been married for 29 years and they loved us so much but they were not overly obsessed with their children. They prioritized their relationship, personal identities, careers, and travels together to be the best parents they could be. I love that I still get to have happily married parents to this day ♥️
That is a true blessing❤
Same here!! ❤❤❤❤❤
Great guy in all respects❤
This divorce lawyer is profoundly spiritual - sounds like it would be a . Contradiction but it isn’t !
My husband and i talked before getting married ,we both asked each other if we would prioritise our children above each other. when they were young. We wrote the answer down on a piece of paper and handed it to each other. We both had written YES and we did. He said he couldnt marry someone who wouldnt put our children first and i agreed.We had 35 yrs together before became terminally ill with cancer,it was my and my childrens priviledge to nurse him to the end.I asked him if he regretted anything in his life ,he said no.I think the issue is wether you agree on what your priorities will be.
I agree and when kids get bigger it's the husband's turn
I have a co worker whom he & his wife prioritized their children first they been married for 45years & he said that’s his only regret, because him & his wife barely know each other they changed over the years, the kids are grown and out the house and barely come visit them
I listened to the podcast… did i miss something or was it one of those “read in between the lines” kind of thing? I don’t remember him saying (and tied even relistening to certain areas) “if kids are your top priority, you’ll divorce “.
My take-away was feeding your kids the illusion that he talks about.
I know, and have listened to, many podcasts with Jordan Peterson and he’s a strong advocate for long term marriage. Has some VERY strong arguments for it, too. And if you take Sexton’s “the wisdom you find is the one you bring up bring up there” the same issues can follow from one relationship to another unless you work through them. Maybe working through them with the partner you have children with is the solution. But i do understand it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. Every relationship is unique with it own individual challenges.
@@Shiria.jYes, that almost always happens when a spouse is last, after all the children.
@nicolegarceau9610 Whoever labeled the podcast insinuated it. In any case, it's a common problem. When the kids grow up and leave home, many marriage partners find they are nearly strangers, because they've thrown all their attention at the kids for 20 years. At this point, many married people decide to split. They have failed to provide an example to their own children of how to maintain love relationship with a spouse.
He is so enjoyable to watch. Very animated, spunky and articulate, brilliant.
The hands ;)
I enjoyed his ideas, but his energy is very stressful to me.
@@slenderforgood Yes 😊 for me to...I had to pause the video a couple of times
The energy isn't stressful for me, I like melodrama and wild gesticulations. 🎭
@@Emanuella166Really? Just watching him made you have to pause?
I watched / listened to this video over the course of 3 days... walking a dog, listening on my breaks... it is a long interview but so rewarding. I have no clue why this was so addictive to watch? Lots of life experience and wisdom there... thank you
I agree
This lawyer seems sincere, and transparent about the cases he represented. He has a likeable voice and the topic is of interest to many people. So much to learn from this podcast. I also listen to these types of videos and walk my dog along the coastal paths whiee listening. Dog gets to be outdoors while we focus on interesting engaging topics. Seems fair 🙂 🐶
Marriage slippage is a term that refers to a gradual decline in the quality of a marital relationship over time. It often happens subtly and may involve reduced emotional connection, communication, intimacy, or general engagement between partners. Causes can range from daily life stresses, lack of communication, unmet expectations, or changes in priorities. Without intentional effort to reconnect and address these changes, the relationship may feel strained or distant, though not necessarily ending in separation or divorce.
Thank you!! I hate these cliffhangers this channel has
Okay, chatgpt. This paragraph reads exactly like the answers chat gpt gives me.
@@graciousSenorbut is it on point?
Thank you! Saved me time from having to watch the entire video. ❤
The video talks about slippage at 1:15:20
"Love is a delusion brought on by inadequate lighting" damn that's profound. I swear this guy speaks in lyrics. I could listen to him all day.
Desire is. Not love.
@@olive4naito duh
i was literally just wondering how he speaks so eloquently, maybe from reading a lot but idk lol it'd be cool to be this nice to listen to
Because he literally said some lyrics. “Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.” Semisonic - closing time
Presbyopia ✨
This man is a philosopher who poses as a VERY VERY GOOD ATTORNEY. lol like his depth and even the way the pitch of his voice switches back and forth has such raw vulnerable honesty. I love this
Love his quote that love is loaned , not permanently gifted. He's such an amazing and interesting person.
He is not an ordinary lawyer because he is a man with a heart of gold 💛 characterized with a very enrich life experience.
@@F16wing I think the reason he is so smart is he is divorced and never remarried. Most idiots remarry and make the same mistake over and over again.
Of course you'd love it.
@@yusufraage8554When I left my ex in the 80’s and divorced, I swore I’d never marry again. All my friends said, “Oh, sure you will. He just wasn’t The One. You’ll find someone else and get married.” Nope. Never did. And I’ve enjoyed my Best Life ever since. 😁👍🏻
This one took me by surprise. I expected to hear about divorce, the process, the mistakes, etc. Instead I sat with tears welling up as James spoke about death and dying. I also learned his mother had leiomyosarcoma. I also have this very rare cancer and have been dealing with it since 2020. I'm Stage 4. Statistically, I'm not supposed to be alive. Thank you James for sharing your stories and perspective. I live in joy and try to 'soften' when things are difficult. Thank you DOAC team for this episode.
God bless you
@hollyhansomsvillage Blessings to you. It’s a miracle youve made it 4yrs. Wishing you peace, comfort, love. Will say a prayer for you. I hope you’re having a good day today. ☮️ Take care.
A sister of mine had leiomyosarcoma~ a spindle cell sarcoma ~ her cancer occurred due to tp53 genetic mutation (which is also called Li Fraumeni syndrome). Turned out this genetic mutation is in our family lineage so then all family were tested to see who else had the genetic mutation. During my sister’s first surgery, she had full hysterectomy, removal of her omentum connective tissue, part of her colon, and bits/pieces off an adrenal gland…. The docs tried to get as large of margins as possible. Anyway, wishing you much strength and all the best.
Sorry to hear that.
As you have nothing to lose and as you still enjoy life, maybe go full carnivore, miracles.happen (Dr Berry, Dr Chafee, etc etc ).
With love.
I watch his first interview with James yesterday. I have seen it on my feed for at least a week before I watched it. I thought it was just something from the menasphere community. Man was it amazing interview and nothing what I expected it to be
Same i was surprised. My mom is going through brain cancer right now after having lung cancer. This is what I needed to hear right now. Thanks for this episode.
My husband and I prioritize each other over our kids. This looks different in different homes. It means sometimes kids' baths are rushed, and sometimes a bedtime story is brief. Sometimes, they don't get to go to the park. He does shift work, and we prioritize time with each other when we can. We've noticed something. Our kids are happy and healthy ❤️. They are growing up in a home with parents who know each other well, spend time together and are heads over heels for each other. Our home's atmosphere is loving and peaceful. There's something ordinary yet magical about that.
That is beautiful!!! 😻 #goals
SPOT ON!!!! So why the kids are brats ending up with divorced parents fighting over the kids. Kids see divided parents like a shark smells blood in the water and use it to their full advantage. Because THEY’RE THE KIDS who need united PARENTS teaching them the proper order of things. Failure to do this often leads to grown kids who disdain one or both parents who then estrange them.
Agreed. We prioritize each other first so there’s plenty of times when we tell the kids to go to bed at 7pm when their bedtime is 9:30pm 😁
Agreed!
That's what happens when a good man knows he's her #1. When a guy is expected to do everything to support her and the family but gets nothing in return, the only thing built is resentment.
This made me cry so much. Thank you. This was life changing experience. I went through the divorce with one husband and I went through the death with the second. I never knew I need to hear this, but now I am looking back to my life differently. The talk about death change my life perspective so much. I am forcing everyone who I love, to watch this interview. Amazing!!!
I am planning a wedding right now for my fiance and I. I became so stressed out when I was trying to do it the "traditional" way, then I threw all of that away and started planning around what WE would want. I am planning the fanciest pizza party anyone has ever been to! Keeping the budget low, and giving space for us to have fun with the people we love most.
Love it 😊
Good for you!
Congrats ! Brilliant ! All the best : )
I'd say I am happy to make your pizza for you, but I probably live too far away.
Probably the best thing ever ; starting A marriage with Financial stress isn’t a good thing either . The total cost of weddings is absolutely outrageous lately ; it’s lovely to see Couples who are prioritizing what’s best for the two of them Vs taking advice from family or Spending more 🤑 than you initially wanted 💯💯!!! Always follow your intuition !! Best of luck on ya wedding & wishing you two success in your Marriage.
I. COULD. LISTEN. TO. JAMES. SEXTON. TALK. FOR. DAYS. Favourite guest!!!!
This dude is brilliant, isn’t he? Ugh. He’s answering so many questions that have never had logical answers to before.
I love James Sexton. He's so wise, charismatic and genuine. Pure joy to watch and listen to!
She's a great lawyer and very soulful. Despite being trans, she really took me by surprise about how serious she is and doesn't even make reverence to her trans identity. She's a great role model
Hes not trans @@AB-lp8jd
This man has really changed my opinion on what I thought divorce lawyers were all like. He's got such a huge heart. I've been married almost 9 years now and going strong. I don't claim to be an expert on marriage at all lol but I can say me and my hubby prioritize each other even though we have 4 kids and we don't forget that it was us two in the beginning that started this family.
How? My kids are little time bandits. (I’m also a stay at home mom), I don’t even get to sleep without one of them or both of them on my side of the bed. In 6 years we’ve had like 12-13 dates without the kids. I’m the one who makes every meal, does every bath, gets them dressed, takes them to school, clean when they leave. How do ppl not fall into this.
@@trevnti We've got 4 kids and we've never let them sleep in our bed so it's just not something they even want to do or think about at all. And I do all of that stuff too during the week when my hubby works but on weekends he pitches in and helps me out. We've had a system for years now (his idea) that on weekends we split up the days so that both of us get to relax. I do breakfast with the kids and lunch while he relaxes in the bedroom with his video games, then in the evening he does dinner and everything after with the kids while I get to relax in the bedroom reading and watching TH-cam (which I'm doing right now lol). Yeah some weekends there's too much going on to pull it off, but most weekends are chill and we manage. It makes both of us happier and more appreciative of the other when we can have that relax time to ourselves. Then when the kids are in their beds asleep, we have our adult time. The smaller kids (7 and 8) go to bed at 9 and the teens stay in their rooms anyways so we get a couple hours of alone time before bed. You just have to set up systems to make it work!
Well said
@@madsquishy3410you are a very thoughtful couple, congrats, it’s good to see parents working as a good and efficient team, really insightful and inspiring 🧚🏼♀️
You guys made that choice to have only 12 dates in 6 years. Its your job to get the babies to a sitter and budget for it if not and there are budget constraints then at least do dates at home when the kids are asleep and dont let the kids run you you have to change your whole family dynamic for it to work
This lawyer is something. Skilled, experienced, delightful speaker, witty, funny and compassionate
James is my favorite lawyer of all-time next to Harvey Specter.
Steven, you are a wonderful host. You allow your guests to speak and you ask great questions that get the best out of them. Congratulations!
Agreed. Steven is great bc he lets people talk. I hope Steven didn't let this guy talk him out of getting married bc he never addressed the 42% who actually stay married and presumably are happy. Why does he assume Steven will fall into the 58%? If you're worried, get a prenup. If ur not worried, get a prenup. Sometimes u gotta take risks in life.
After Diary of CEO it’s really difficult to listen to podcasts with guests as just often yap and interrupt, and insert a million filler words and hums. I can’t unnotice that. Steven is an excellent host and lets his guests take the stage.
@@motogirlz101I thought the same, but I reminded myself that Steven is a great host because he listens to understand, and he hears a TON of different opinions that he may or may not agree with, and all spoken by people who are very passionate and experienced in their fields. I assume hosts like him have a great ability to compartmentalize and set internal boundaries to not let a guest’s opinion change their beliefs and values.
I think James is by far my favorite guest on any podcast. His eloquence, his wit, his sense of humor - coupled with a wonderful depth of wisdom and live experience. So happy this conversation was as long as it was; it felt like it blew by in 1 hour. \
What book is he talking about here? Do you have a clue?
This lawyer has a degree in psycholgy. He is also an excellent performer. He is acting all the time. His body language, his voice, the way he uses his gestures, he is amazing. He even cries. The perfect combination to be a succesful lawyer in the US.
Yes I got that. Definitely. Reminds me of Michael Douglas when he was younger 😮
I read this and for the rest of the interview I saw Cluster B. It's amazing how personalities matches careers perfectly.
@@tatatat-vm9dl I was married to a guy like this. He could cry on queue. Sometimes had me believing it but deep down I was sceptical. However because I didn't fake cry I thought other people didn't. My life has been filled with fake liars. I believed them. I didn't realise people just make 💩up all day long?
I have noticed that people do it on podcasts especially if the person they talk about is dead........
So you don’t believe in the story he shares about his mother contemplating mortality most of her life due to her Cancer diagnosis. Your judgement may be flawed I think 💭; but that’s your Opinion!!! He’s educating us in Appreciating the life we got now ; appreciating the simple things in life ; b’coz one day some day ; we’ll be all Gone 🤷🏿🤷🏿. I highly doubt that he’s putting on A performance.
I got the same performative vibe from him and I was just listening… he’s a bit much, blaming the judge for letting him win and how many times he had to repeat “I was just doing my job!” Then saying the system failed that abused woman and in the next breath saying he has to trust the system. Yikes. I’m outta here after the first 15 minutes.
Man I could listen to this guy ALL day, just so much wisdom and experience oozing from James that I always walk away with a more understanding of life and myself. Love him!
Same!!! He's brilliant, articulate and much more!
If you like listening to him, you will love “Meditation” by Marcus Aurelius, a brilliant Stoic philosopher and Roman emperor.
When he used the metaphor about the broken tea cup and living the reality, it resonated with a popular saying from my Country (Brazil) "work with what you have for today" . Don't know if it makes sense in English, but it does mean to accept your reality and live the present, doing what you can with what you have now, without passively waiting for "when things get better".
Challenges in relationships are part of the journey, but there’s always a way to move forward. My own marriage had significant hurdles, but with the right help, my wife and I overcame them and grew stronger. With effort and cooperation, solutions can be found. Keep your hope-solutions are within reach.
Parting with someone you love is always a challenging process, but in my experience, I had the guidance of a spiritual guide who prevented my marriage from collapsing. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
I promise you will not regret it
Challenges... yes, but not abuse. This man's first story was about a pimp viciously attacking the mother of his children.
Do the housework, bills and the shopping. And any maintenance including repairs you can. @GodfreyKelz
Love this comment!!💞 Please don't miss out on your perfect one..because of this opinion. It's exactly that an opinion. Especially the part on marraige is dangerous.
A divorce attorney with a heart! I didn't think that was possible. Always impressed with James' eloquent human insights and life wisdom, spoken with occasional inconvenient unfettered truth but with noble and kind intentions.
Of course it is.
With a heart? But he continues to represent that pimp? He’s already rich and could be representing the poor.
The fact that he has a HEART makes him more dangerous if hes your opponent because if his HEART is in his client's case, he'll feel divine justice for tearing your ass open legally. 😂
I solved all my relationship problems in my mid 40's when I decided to follow celibacy, and amazingly everything just fell into place. My life as a middle aged man blossomed, I didn't realise just how emotionally draining it was trying to please others, but mostly my own desires! Truly, if you conquer lust, attachment and dependency, life is sooooo much more rewarding and you feel a sense of self-sovereignty.
I learned that the only person you will have a relationship with your entire life is yourself. You need to do everything you can to preserve that relationship. If you lose that, you can say goodbye to all your other relationships. Whether it's your partner, children, parents, etc. you need to make your relationship with yourself the #1 focus. People tend to lose that focus, and then it weakens their relationship with others.
This is straight up to the top three of any guests that you have had on the show. What a dude!
The amount of life wisdom this guy has is unbelievable
My parents have a successful 37 year marraige. Selecting well is definitely number one, and someone on the same level as you as far as values and goals.
They both worked alot growing up but what kept their relationship going I think was all the projects they did together. Restoring our victorian era house to magazine quality, building gardens, working on rental properties and they don't get distracted by other people and spending tons of time going out etc. The momentum built generational wealth, they saw a bigger picture than just day to day pleasure.
@Martin-rh7mf y the rental is recent within the past two years. It's a cottage so it’s the painting the decorating and hearing about people enjoying their stay is what it’s about for them. Working on a project together then seeing the fruit of it. I’m sure if it was a residential property It would be more of a headache.
Example of adage: two persons, in order to have a successful marriage, must have a shared vision down the road
@@judithholder2537ya nailed it 🎯
Love this! My bf and I plan to do the same. He’s a really estate broker and investor. I’m a doctor . We’re holding off on marriage until a few more years but want to build in this same way.
I’m happy for you that your parents grew and changed in the same direction throughout their marriage. Some other couples went through exactly the same things like kids, work, home renovations and rentals, but they grew apart instead.
I always learn so much from him ! I am married, and I like listening to stuff that can help us, things that we never taught about. I just love this !
One of my favourite guests. Empathetic, reasonable, articulate, a pleasure to listen to.
This guy could be talking about anything and I'd watch/listen. James Sexton is a gem!
No #1 relationship advisor .. can point out truths speaker .. And his name is also *JAMES SEXTON*.. he’s really very intelligent .. & we all .. can learn lots from this man .. he’s so Truthful and fun to listen to ..
I love James. I've watched so many podcasts with him. His outlook aligns so closely with mine. I am very fortunate to have an ex-husband I get along great with and our kids are better for it. We've honestly worked harder being great co-parents than we did being partners in marriage. Which is unfortunate that we didn't see that at the time. But I am so so grateful that we found our friendship again through the rubble of our broken marriage.
This gives me hope! Thank you!
Same here. He just spoke out on all the muddled thoughts I have circulating in my head on a daily basis. We get to a certain age where we experience loss, some heavier than others, and it can be difficult to try and understand it all.
I agree with you. I found it easier to re-build the friendship outside of our marriage, than within it.
Also, a longshot and slightly creepy of me to ask, but I feel like we've spoken before... Kalina is that you? If not, I'm sorry. Your profile reminds me of someone I used to talk to.
@@myself2861 Sorry, I'm not Kalina! Maybe we've crossed paths in the comments section before?!
I always wonder how two people great co parent but could not do it when were married. ... 😕
I'm a hospice nurse going through a divorce and WOW. James is totally captivating. His energy and everything he says very much resonates, from openness about death to his Zen quotes. This is a VERY intriguing convo. Thank you.
Look after yourself.
Sorry you are through a divorce. I'm going through divorce myself for the second time. Just know that with time it does get easier.
Hospice Care can be difficult if you're not prepared for the reality of someone dying, but it can be so rewarding & a privilege to be with someone when they pass away.
This guy is so real. ❤
Think, “Happy Spouse,Happy House.” It’s a two way thing ! Great video guys !👌👏
So glad you had him back. I really enjoy his forthrightness, intelligence, and passion. People need to know it's okay to be unmarried! It's great if you have a wonderful marriage, but it's also great to be happily single. We don't receive the "happily single" message much in our culture, though. James puts critical thinking behind the proposition of marriage, questioning the default response we're brainwashed to have about what happily ever after looks like. A conversation between Steven and James is gold. Thanks, guys!
Life is a game and you can win. Winning is staying true to yourself and being happy
James Sexton and Johann Hari are my favorite guests on your show. Jim is a delight to listen to and has wonderful insights not only on relationships, but on life, death and authenticity. I'm not one to comment on podcasts or really any kind of post, but this one is special. I laugh and I cry every time you have Jim on and I always learn something. You are, of course, a wonderful host and ask the questions we wish we could ask and actually let your guest answer - what a concept. Thanks for the excellent work you do!
I thought I would dislike him but I loved him ❤
Loved his honesty, intelligence, vulnerability and how loving he seems!
Such a great interview.
who knew that a sage would come to us in the form of a divorce lawyer with heavy new york accent - love this guy!
I am very happy with the great words Steve/Steven said to James by the end because they do serve him justice of appreciation. The reason that James has been on the rise is not because he is a divorce lawyer (How many divorce lawyers are there?); it's because of the immense insight and wisdom he has as well as the courage and audacity to go out and say what he believes. Also, he's a tremendously great speaker and communicator, just able to keep your attention without ever boring you. James, you're a pleasure to have around.
I've just found James Sexton. He is saying everything that resonates with me. He has earned much wisdom that is needed for many ears to hear. Thank you James! He is incredibly timeless and down to earth and relevant. I would love to be friends!
This guy said some of the most profound things. Thank you for inviting him on your podcast 😊
love how philosophical and insightful this LAWYER is! seriously this is the messages the world needs. the perspctives that people lack to promote more peace
“I’m a lawyer” would be such an understatement of an intro if you were to meet this man. Best guest ever on this show. Chainsaw in one hand, beautiful flower in the other and loving it both.
His delivery is so animated. I love watching this guy's interviews and hearing his thought processes. Always a fresh perspective
Re Jame's suggestion: Forty odd years ago, after our first anniversary dinner, I suggested a walk along the beach and during that walk I set forth the idea to make this a yearly check in, by sharing a few things that annoyed us and a few things we appreciated about each other. I thought this was very grown up and a way to keep in touch with how each of us was feeling. Unfortunately, my husband was horrified and shut me down so fast we ended up fighting. Needless to say the marriage did not survive despite going on to have three children. It obviously requires both partners to be open enough to hear good and uncomfortable truths about themselves and how to offer that to in exchange. Moral of the story - choose wisely. 🙏 to your guest. I feel, at last, validated in what I was hoping to achieve and wish others more success than i had.
Thank you for sharing your experience. Outside looking in, respectfully I think you may have opened that conversation with the best of intentions but the worst in execution. Why an annual check in? Why not a monthly, or biweekly, or quarterly frequency? I imagine your ex-husband heard the opening to the conversation as “Let’s take 1 day a year to voice our grievances with one another that we’ve compiled in the last year” and that may have been very off putting for him.
But to your credit, he also sounds like he did not ask for further clarification and immediately got defensive, which may mean either (1) this was a really important topic for him that he felt you two were at odds, or that (2) he heard what he heard and that was good enough for him (sense of immaturity). Either way, sorry to hear about your separation but it sounds like it might have been for the best.
Oof. I almost burst into tears. I lost my rescue a few years ago and my boyfriend at the time got me a new pup immediately after. It was a dog he knew I always wanted, but I couldn’t believe him. I loved my rescue Bella deeply. Losing her really broke my heart. I thought I was betraying her by having Coco. Fast forward to today, my Coco is glued to me & I love her so much! I would have never had HER had I not lost Bella. It’s bittersweet and tough to explain, but it’s life.
It's just so enjoyable to listen to James gush about the things he loves and to hear the emotions in his voice regarding challenging situations he's faces. Such a passionate storyteller. Fabulous content. Great Life Lessons. Thank you!
Omg - when he said - this person has been loaned to you does not belong to you. You need to water the plant can’t keep walking by and not water the plant and except this person is yours. He’s really real. Truly enjoyed it all. Super hard convos. Different perspectives.
This is crazy because I only found the original interview last week (and subsequently this channel) and there's already a follow up! Incredible content as ever. I very much appreciate hearing James's point of view about divorce and loss and love. So very refreshing from someone with years worth of experience. Thank you for another great interview!
James insights on relationships and marriage have seriously changed my whole perspective. As a young woman who isn’t married, I didn’t expect a divorce lawyer to have such an impact, but the way he breaks things down is just incredible. I’ve watched a lot of interview he’s done and am devouring his book-his wisdom is something I can’t get enough of. Honestly, it’s time for James to have his own podcast! Whether it’s solo or even just a quick 10-minute episode, I’d be all in. So grateful there’s a second interview-just hoping for way more of him in the future! 🥰
Just take note. A divorce expert doesn't make him a marriage expert. Would you take financial advice from a broke person?
@@marnevantonder83 True, a divorce lawyer isn’t a marriage expert, but here’s why I find James Sexton’s advice priceless: his insights go way beyond divorce. He talks about gratitude, real appreciation for the little things, and making sure your partner feels valued daily-like leaving a small note or noticing their efforts. He emphasizes healthy communication, avoiding those sitcom-style complaints to friends, and resolving issues directly instead of letting resentment build. In his stories, even small things-like the ‘BJ’s and granola’ story-show how neglecting tiny gestures can start chipping away at a marriage long before any downfall.
He isn’t telling us how to be married; he’s sharing what makes them break down and reminding us how vital these small acts of love are to keep them strong. That’s the kind of advice everyone in a relationship can benefit from, married or not. I am just a fan of his insights tbh. 🌸🌸
I hope you discover that man that you can’t imagine living without and never have to worry about a life without him. That is a win.
@@marnevantonder83you mean taking advice from a finance professional who helps broke people out.
Otherwise your analogy is not the same
@@havealavalyday543 he deals with broken marriages, not good ones. He doesn't know what the good ones look like. He himself is divorced and doesn't necessarily believe in marriage.
I was SOOO thrilled to see him again on the show! His first episode profoundly changed my life and led me to divorce, best decision ever made, despite the sadness. This episode resonated with me, again, in so many ways. I love his advice at the end - paying attention to him, her and we. I can’t wait to read his book and to see him invited again… I could listen to this man forever! THANK YOU
The duality of the person this guy genuinely is and the profession he found himself in is wild. He refers to himself as a weapon, a chainsaw. But on the other side of the coin is one of the most thoughtful, intelligent and intentionally speaking person I’ve heard in so long. It’s a confusing dichotomy but I’m here for every second.
He's damn good at what he does😬 but he's also an empathic human 🫠
He is warning people. On the stress chart death and divorce are one and two…divorce could easily be number 1.
Absolutely value James for his views. This man for a divorce specialist knows the important aspects of love.
Thank you James for your input on the world
This is by far the best guest and conversation I've heard from any podcast. Great questions and even greater answers. Very nice. Thanks!! 👏👏👏
The keys to a happy marriage are making sure spending time with your wife is a top priority. Also making sure you selected well to begin with- connection >lust. Also never forget to keep up the things you did to win over your spouse in the beginning .
sounds life happy wife happy life bs. how about just finding a woman that has morals and values. it's not a man's job to play into a woman's follies. a man's job is to provide and protect.
Yeah but providing means giving a lot of ur money, nah mate don’t do that…. Yous are a team, we all work now, believe it or not…. Women work too!! Hahahaha so guess what?? Yes we can buy them things but they can do this too, yes!! We can shout dinner or gifts, etc but they can too!!!
@@g3nj1 no. It’s about treating your woman very well and making her a priority. Likewise, she does the same for you.
Like a Stockholm syndrome....
Well said! Quality time, connection and attention, working to keep the attraction up and never stopping to make the same effort as in the beginning ❤
Met James while I was running errands over the weekend. What a kind and generous guy. Wish him the best.
I met him right after you did and he told me that he didn’t like you. 😮
@ Ha………………..Ha………………..Ha
I cannot like him enough! Such a great guest and excellent job interviewing him- Profound!
Wow! I had so much stuff to do this morning but I sat down to watch this with my morning coffee and just couldn’t stop! This chap is so interesting, charismatic and insightful! I’m going through a divorce just now and so much resonated, but mostly I just kept listening because he’s a fascinating and inspiring human being
I LOVE LISTENING TO JAMES!!! He is so genuine and realistic.
My favorite guest so far! I could listen to him all day and the fact that Steve almost had a 3-hour in-depth convo with him only shows that he enjoys listening to him too.
James has been such an eye opener on topics that we mostly run away from.
Keep up the great work Steve; your Kenyan fan here! ❤️☺️
This guy is entertaining for sure, everything he says is so true and relatable, divorce lawyer must be the best profession as you'll never run out of work!!
Also morticians
I exclusively use TH-cam as my”social media” resource, and I have to say pretty much every content creator asks/pleas for likes and subscribing. Mostly it is rather annoying especially when they repeat the ask throughout the vid.
YOU, however, I hit like and subscribe on my first watch. I usually take a few episodes to decide about a channel, but I knew right away you are a quality content facilitator. Someone who lets others shine in his presence and actually brings the better light out. You seem to be a kind, compassionate man, a very intuitive interviewer. You also seem to “read the room” well. You listen to your audience. You care about your content. It feels very personal to me.
Not that my opinion matters, but in general, I see so many people only comment when something is wrong. I like to take notice when something is right!
Well done.
I feel the exact same way. This guy is genuine and cares
You’re so right, he’s one of none!
Its true life is a game you cant win! James is so insightful! I have always truly believed people marry for the wrong reasons.Convention,companionship,family expectations but rarely because the truly love each other and are compatible.Such an interesting compassionate man!
One of my favourite guests! Love his conversations, his views and how he articulates everything. Another great conversation. I hope you have him again
It was great to hear someone articulating how I think and feel about death, marriage, and children in marriage. A profound conversation. Thanks DOAC
I can listen to this man all day. So grateful for this interview and for James generosity to share so much of his wisdom. Great video! ❤
His was the first DOAC interview I've ever watched, and I've been hooked ever since ❤
Same ❤
Same
Same
This guy could be a great Hollywood actor. He has awesome expressions and acts out what he's trying to explain like a pro
It seems a little Italian, or is it just New York
I just commented that he reminds me of the small Chinese guy in the movie "the hangover"
He is just like Saul in Breaking Bad😁
He is an actor, he’s a lawyer and a narcissist.
The best lawyers are always good actors.
I loved this show!!! This man has so much passion in his teachings he had me focused the entire time. I’m going through relationship issues and dealing with aging parents and facing thoughts of dealing with death as well. Even so I cared for seniors for years, it’s not easier. He’s brilliant and you Sir have wonderful and meaningful deep questions for guests !love it!
I must’ve watched hundreds of your videos over the last couple of years Steven but none have delighted me quite as much as this! Love your work!🌈💜
Jim is an exceptionally intelligent and intriguing combination of a psychologist, a lawyer, and an experienced storytelling beast! As a never-before married woman, after listening to the podcast, I will no longer feel the sense of inadequacy that the world throws at some of us who, for one reason or another, decided not to add to the 56% of failed marriages! I knowwwwww so many who have completely lost their identity and are practically stuck in this social construct. Marriage is not necessarily meant for everyone.
Thanks. I needed this. I've never met a man with an perspective so ridiculously close to mine. I started thinking I'm the freak with no place in this world with my opinion about marriage and love.
Almost crying seeing in comments how many people actually agree with that.
Wonderful conversation. I loved your first interview with James. He is passionate about his work. His narration is simple yet full of wisdom and meaning. I could listen to him talk all day.
11:11 The story Mr. Sexton shared which broke his heart, toward the end he said it was not a good day, and that he might not believe in his clients but that he has to believe in the system. He also said that the victim of his client who was poor should not have lost. but like, poor people are typically targets of those who have more resources, more money. Thats a systemic flaw. As I understand it it is incredibly hard to have a good outcome in these scenarios of perpetrator vs, under resourced, abused, survivor who is also a co-parent. Ive heard it argued that the system keeps the system this way. I hope this guy becomes inspired to advocate for a change to the system he says he has to believe in.
He is right about social media. People who usually post their Happy Life really are not happy, this goes for marriage, wealth, or success. They are not getting their dopamine and are looking for other people to reach out to compliment them. These photos are usually to convince themselves more than anything.
SO many valuable lessons in these two interviews alone! definitely the best guest so far on the podcast 👏
this man is one of the best guests you have had on the show....he is genuine and emotional and the way he speaks touches your heart
Thank you Steven for bringing him back❤ The previous episode with him was your best podcast ever this guy is awesome on so many levels, cannot wait to watch!!
I have learned sooo... much in this podcast and realized how naive we are about relationships and jumps into marraiges with beeing with this idea of everything will workout fine .🤔😏 This was truly the most sensable teaching about life as it should be. I hope this man opens a school to teach people about humanity in truth and wisdom to make families holesame and meaningfull. GREAT STUFF.!!
Incredible insight from someone who has to deal with the worst sides of being in a relationship/marriage.
Absolute favourite guest on this podcast - open, direct, honest and I love the way he speaks. Incredibly engaging and captivating. The episodes on which he is on are the ones I even downloaded to be able to rewatch when on the underground. ❤ gives such a positive outlook on love, life, death and moving forward despite uncertainty.
I so needed this episode after getting separated, with children involved. This episode reminds me that life has to be taken with humour and lightness to overcome difficult moments. Thank you❤
Wow, this lawyer is on a whole different level! His expressive mimics and gestures, along with his deep level of awareness, kept me hooked. So much wisdom and life experience is thrown at us. I couldn’t stop watching!
Best channel on TH-cam, hands down! Interesting guests and good host, lots of thoughts provoking conversations. Big thank you to the team behind these videos, you are all amazing!
I’m so grateful that a guest who recently captured my heart visited my favorite host. It was a delightful dialogue. Thank you
Thank you for guesting him again in your show❤ He is one of my most favorites! Full of wisdom, love for life, and at the same time so much understanding and respect for death and endings❤
The first time I ran into this channel was with James first interview with Steven. Since then I’ve been a hardcore fan of this channel and James.
This 2nd interview brought me great joy and I wish this man nothing but happiness and grace!
Quoted “Closing Time”, every new beginning comes from some others beginning’s end
Iceberg Slim, a pimp, said in his autobiography that he knows why Lady Justice has a blindfold on, it’s because she has dollar signs for eyeballs.
OMG yes! Didn't even realize it when he said it haha. Love it!
What a beautiful 😂conversation....I wish we had more lawyers like James.He is a great human being!!!!
He is SO good, no BS. I agree with 99% of what he says. Thanks so much for the discovery!
I'm glad you asked him why he became a hospice volunteer.. I've always wondered what inspired him to do that.
I can't help but fall more in love 😍with this guy every time I hear him speak. He's wicked intelligent, an independent thinker (which I absolutely love), compassionate & passionate (love that too), insightful, wise, in touch with his feelings, articulate, and nice to look at too lol. I have always believed in life partnership but questioned marriage and I feel validated every time I listen to James. Thank you Steven for having James on and for the quality content that you guys created🤗. I will definitely be looking for the book! 🤓
💯
Lol chill shorty
Please don't allow your emotions to become so naive. Your gushing over someone you don't know and I'm sorry to say but females of this mindset are usually suseptible to falling for the wrong men because they are easily played.
3:30 - the 2 things that made the most impact from last interview was James love for his dog and his guidance about prenups. SO EXCITED JAMES IS BACK ON SCREEN!
I love this guy. He’s very engaging, entertaining and funny. Explains things well
This guy is such a reality check. Watched both his episodes and so much stuck to me. Thank you!
James Sexton is a bit of a mystic with his insights around death and dying.
So much wisdom in his life experiences. 🙏🏼