Hey Lisa, I was wondering if perhaps in the future, maybe you could have someone on to have a conversation about eating disorders, like anorexia for example. It's talked about so little yet it affects so many people, and it's important to know about it because of how dangerous they are. It's an important topic that somehow is still not properly being discussed. Xx
I really wish this episode talked more about how people are choosing isolation/loneliness or just being set in their ways rather than interacting with other people, trauma aside.
I totally agree, to have friends you must be a friend, and a lot of people are not willing to put in the sacrificial work to be present and active in fulfilling relationships with others.
Well, for me my work is vey social. so I get plenty of interaction with people. Its arms length, but that works for me. No connections, but still talk with and enjoy people for a minute.
Well I have always been more unconventional and different and it’s harder for me to find my tribe. Most people are very mundane and materialistic and I just don’t find them interesting. Otherwise, I am very social and can talk to anyone. But most relations I find to be draining, lacking depth or some lacking fun.
It wasn't until I was 44 that I was able to heal my sexual trauma and finally learn how to become orgasmic. It was a long journey of celibacy and self reflection and re-regulating my nervous system. To learn how to be in love with life and connected to all of the Universe gave me the serenity and joy I was seeking. Once I found peace and healing within I met my now husband and was just married last year at 50 years old. My heart goes out to anyone suffering in loneliness. May your hearts and lives be filled with love and joy in whatever forms arise.
This was such a multi- faceted conversation! You hit on friendship, dating,love, sex, trauma, through the lens of endocrinology and neurobiology which speaks to my educational background but the spiritual side is very important too. I do think there's a huge problem in healthy male female dynamics and Gen z is the culmination of that, I feel bad for them. But we older millennials are also affected. I clicked on this video because I've definitely been feeling lonely in every way🙁. I've been on a spiritual journey and as you come back to yourself, you start to cut out a lot of people or lose people once you realize they were benefiting from your lack of boundaries or attachment style or trauma. I've cut out family and friends. But what's happened now that I feel emotionally safe in my bubble is that I'm now afraid and resistant to letting people in or dating. It's sad because I have always wanted deep connection more than anything in the world. I'm an INFJ, HSP, Empath and I think I have an avoidant attachment style. I've always felt different. So I just can't do surface level anymore, I can't let just anyone in, I'm not willing to dull, dim or dumb down to fit in. Making friends is hard once you're in your 30s or older. I want to find my tribe but the FEAR and self protection is so strong. Can you have someone come on to talk about overcoming insecure attachment styles in order to get better relationships.
I'd like to ask Lisa... Can you perhaps do an interview for women over 50 experiencing loneliness...how to handle being single and not having a partner as they age?
I just assume I will die alone. After childbearing age no currency on the market. Children grow up move away. You are alone. If you invested in a man instead of your own career you will also die broke. I guess I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.. But that’s only my experience… I’m sure others have had much better experiences.. I’m hoping…
I told people of my loss and pain because I was lonely and wanted acceptance 😔 It then went from envy and jealousy to pity and more isolation, why bother , Humans are looking for someone worse off then them to feel better ,what is love ..!!!! Bonds with spirit, nature animals, children and yrself not other adults!!!!
The problem with people is they think they need other people to complete them & they do not. God has given you everything you need inside of yourself. Most relationships rob that from you, women want to own men, men want to own women. Learn to love yourself. There is a real beauty in Freedom.
No we are social creatures... You are wrong so completely very wrong😒 God made it that we literally die if we are isolated with no tribe. Do your research.
Not true. We are made to be in unions and social connections. We are not meant to be by ourselves and not needing anyone. This is the modern BS that drives loneliness and disconnect even further. Yes, we need to love ourselves and have self worth but we are not meant to be alone. Nor we ever feel complete.
I believe y’all are missing the point of this comment. This is in the context of romantic relationships. Not friends/ family . She’s meaning a partner.
@@86Kera I was meaning a partner so as all replies. We need a partner, we were not made to be alone. We can’t procreate alone either. Everything in nature comes in pairs and completes one another. Everything in our body and Mind is “designed” to have a partner and to be in partnerships. If someone is complete alone - let them be. But most % of people need a partner. We need love and to be loved and share love. Nothing makes it complete experiencing things by ourselves without a partner. People who comment like this - are usually bitter and allowed disappointments and heartbreaks harden their heart. Such comments and thinking is a coping mechanism, a denial, a reaction to past pain. They don’t want to feel pain again so now going “I am happy by myself, I don’t need anyone”. But deep down they are afraid.
Since I was a kid I always loved and had animals. There was no one else to give me the love I was not getting except my pets. And sometimes my parents took that away from me as well. My parents sucked, I was the mistake by the lake for my mother, she left us, and my father is a sociopath. My brother has his own issues and a little bit of both parents. I no longer will put up with his disrespect. 2 husband's that were not good choices, but I didn't know better. Now I do and can't find anyone. Friends have abandoned me. My son blames me for everything since I divorced his father, even tho i was the only one there and raising him. No, one helped or stepped up, until the hard work was done. He now thinks my brother is the bomb and will probably get hurt or taken advantage of by him. How much pain does one have to go thru? At 55 I'm back to animals and ME. I finally figured out that the love I was looking for or needed just doesn't exist for me. I'm no longer lonely. I take care of me and live the best life I can. My 2 cats give me more than any one ever has, I travel the world, have done things most people never get the chance to. That is what was meant for, and you have to be capable of some unattachment to live that life.
Try Jesus if you have not tried Him before. Jesus is love and if a person does not know the love of Jesus then they will not know how to love you. Hope you find true love soon. 🙏🏾
28 and I'm done. Got dumped two years ago after a 2.5 year relationship . Bad experiences on dating apps ever since. Last guy ended up being a situationship who just wanted a regular sex thing, and he had narcissistic tendencies. First guy I met after finally cutting him off, ended up love bombing and playing me. He quit talking to me after I slept with him. I'm so broken, feel undesirable and unlovable. So cynical and can't trust anyone has serious intentions. My depression and self esteem are worse than ever. I deleted all of the apps. Having a husband and family is important to me but I've just accepted it will never happen.
Yeah, it’s really rough out here if you desire a genuine and committed relationship. I’ve had the same experiences with online dating. I’m just giving up and focusing on me!❤
Don't think it'll never happen but the APPS aren't it. I had a similar experience from a guy i met IN REAL LIFE - it broke my spirit, sense of self esteem and said the exact same things as you wrote above. It hurts worse, especially when you're a good, honest woman who just wants to find respect, love and marriage. You might be too sad to see it now but when the dust settles, you will have learned to trust your gut, to walk away IMMEDIATELY when you have a gut feeling that something is off, to never give a man you don't know through consistent reliability the benefit of the doubt and you will save your peace moving forward. You will have standards of respect from the beginning that will be unmovable because you have yourself to lose. That's a powerful lesson that I had to learn myself. There are good men out there but there are a lot more who don't have good intentions and aren't good, empathetic men with solid character. Don't let shitty men make you see the whole world in grey - good men DO exist and it will only take ONE for it to work for you so why can't it ever happen?! You're smarter, more intuitive - pain is the greatest teacher.
I've been there😢 couldn't get out. At 39 I got pregnant without a man and I'm now happy with my 12 month old girl❤ She loves me. It's the first homemade love I experience❤. But I love in Germany and get paid maternity leave for a year. Plus 250€ child money from the government. It makes being a single mom easier her than in the states
I love my solitude, but will always need outside connections. Isolated completely due to a long term narc marriage at the moment. In a remote area with very limited resources. He dumped us here together, then left us without the resolution I didn't know would never come, yet. I filed for divorce immediately after he left working on us. He gave me his answer. He's stealing our four bedroom house while beating me down psychologically, making it impossible to fight him with just the strength of my pinky finger. He's crushed all things good by dumping me with disabilities knowing I can't keep up with cleaning a home. He's laughing all the way to and from court, smelling like a rose.
Please tell me how to make friends in your mid 40s if they are so vital? Working from home. Idk if anyone else feels this way, but it's incredibly difficult to make and maintain friendships these days.
Yes, absolutely. I also work from home mostly and also find most people very mundane and don’t find anything in common easily. Besides most friendships nowadays are very superficial.
Ppl don't won't to put in the work, real friendship, real love, real connections, being honest, takes work. Can you imagine doing everything humanly possible to have a friend succeed or imagine doing everything possible to see yourself succeed? Selfish creatures we are.😑
I have to point out that women are pressured into being married because society conditioned women to think they're nothing without a man. The problem I see with having timelines and rushing into marriage because everyone else is doing it is you become disconnected with yourself and more worried with outside validation. This creates loneliness in relationships. Loneliness in relationship is way worse than single and lonely because you can lose yourself in relationships making you more disconnected from self. I think relationships are beautiful, I'm not anti-relationship, I'm just saying. Ladies, pour into your friendships and relationships with family members not just romantic partner.
This has nothing to do with actually loving humans, creation, self and God. This is about survival bonding, extracting approval & the illusion of security on a changing, insecure earth. We're here TO love, not demand it like a drug. If we want to extract acceptance & "security," we can join a cult or gang or codependent family. If you want to love, as a grownup soul, you can love others no matter how they do or don't supply the addictive substance of approval. This young lady is growing, so that's wonderful.
Babies and children need that security and approval to become loving, productive, healthy adults. They need to learn to love themselves and be their own approval. Thats really hard to do when people are constantly telling you, you are not worthy of love or approval. Someone who is continually emptying their fuel tank and not getting it refilled is not in a healthy relationship, they are a martyr. It's not about love as a drug or being codependent it's about balance. What's healthy. Loving yourself is healthy. Loving others is healthy. Excepting any and all behavior from others, even negative, is not healthy.
My sister also married young and recently got divorced at 49. He turned out to be a bad husband in every way, shape and form. I think the important detail is meeting someone who's a genuinely good person as early as possible.
30 and already feel that a loving partner is something I can never have. Want to hear about how to face the life long loneliness. Anyone else feels the same？
As a 40 year old, I can say 30 is SO young! I know women in their 70's finding the loves of their life... Stay hopeful and rooted in the knowledge of the beauty of your light and I believe people, love, animals, experiences will come your way 💜
@@stephanie_allen Thank you so much，what you said are so powerful，it‘s just sometimes I get frustrated and not even realizing I also have the light in me. This is exactly what I need to hear about！Many thanks and hope you living your dream life 40+ to forever！💗✨
@@stephanie_allen you cant get pregnant at 70yrs old. Some people not even at 40. My mom had her menopause at 45. Women need to be aware of this. Very aware.
@@etcwhatever this woman was speaking to finding love and worried about feeling lonely the rest of her life and my comment referred to that. Child bearing is an entirely different topic. You can have love without having children and you can have children without having love. One does not necessitate the other.
@@disco2278 💜💜💜 I would say that’s your homework- when you start feeling despair and sadness and thoughts come in like ‘I’ll never find love..’ shake yourself awake and pull your thoughts and attention to the beauty inside you. It changes how you feel about you, how you express in the world and then people get to feel that too! 💜✨🥰
Pray to God to make you grateful for all you have. Some ppl have no food to eat. Loneliness is beautiful when we pray. Then the noise of people has no attraction. A good friend or two is nice but never 10 or 20.
Great topic because LONELINESS is around so much these days for most people. She is right about love & loneliness effects. I write lots of old fashion letters with stamps (not FB or email) to family and friends. during COVID 19 I made handouts on differ issue and mailed to friends and family. They all laughed at me but did not care. Every 90 days write my family & friends. Most do not write back, but will call.. But my son 30 yrs old kind of loner himself stated he did not want any more letters from me. It hurt me because I do not call him hardly at all ..but I get no Xmas or birthday or Mother s day gifts or even calls. He acts like he detest me but no idea why. I do not understand it but guess he is clinging to his rich step mom. I was great uplifting good moral type of Mother. I think he is mad cause divorced his Dad..if I had not divorced I d be dead now. We just did co parenting in differ homes during his late teens. As an adult he understands nothing but his own way. Now living in new very large city and working but coworkers distant too. I am feeling so distant ready to work home alone/remote. I believe try go to places see people....walking, join book club or create one , penpals, or take a class may help me. I wanted to get a dog but afraid get attached and forget people all together. I should write a book because always wanted too and have great imagination.Thank you for this video!!
Im very isolated but joined a prayer group and its truly a joy. I didnt made friends, its recent...but i feel energized. You should def join a group dedicated to one of your interests. Just for the sake of experience. If theres potential friends it will happen
Need more information on where to safely get psychedelic treatments she was mentioning and overall super interested in her take on it - please do another episode!
I think people are trying to put a “band-aid” on the problem. It doesn’t really help to have these things that “help people feel more connected with a partner” when finding a partner is increasingly more difficult. I think the human connection on finding a partner and proper dating needs to be addressed before these can be.
After discovering 35 years on my husband turned into the worst non stop covert narcissistic sociopath, I am looking for mutual friendship going forward. We're divorcing at 40 years. A narc could very easily shelf it and care less, moving on. Where the empath hangs on to the good parts and memories, severing becomes painful.
Great info!!! Thank you! My only 2 cents being older and experiencing things myself; If a guy is on a date, just ended a relationship with a female that i recently met; i can SEE the red flags from a million miles away and there’s nothing in that man that I’d personally want to know any more of. I can tell by the way he is so casual with of ya we broke up, I’m on this date, hey you want to go on a date- I’d be “busy” and “not available” because that guy was a serial dater and screams drama. I’d rather keep my head down and keep peace with females that were even vaguely being introduced and meeting until i really knew that whole scene and had all the information. I think that’s something we miss when we’re younger females and that guy wasn’t worth the potential drama. He wasn’t looking for anything other than seeing women and i could’ve seen that a million miles away with the information i have now. Good life lessons for ladies trying to find their way with dating and interactions with other women.
It's females like you that make other females single. Life is about taking risk. You have to open yourself up to allow someone in. I am not taking about sleeping with everyone either.
Whos got the money to throw dinner parties? What working person has the time or gas money to hang out with 5 social groups? What poor working single mother is gonna hang with her poor working neighbors? This is a rich girls chat, not for single mother full time working, cleaning, child nurturing in the hour and a half after work and before bedtime. This video feel sooo out of touch with "not rich-girl" experiences. This video made me feel so inadequate being a poor woman with limited time and money and energy, what are poor working women with children supposed to do about loneliness? This woman in the video seems like shes never been middle class or known anyone middle class who works a "job", not a "career".
How do you find that first person to make friends with when you try everything and no one reciprocates your connection? I’d also love to hear stories about men with low sex drives and women with high sex drives and the pain of men with NPD/BPD/cluster b issues using withholding sex as a weapon, because I’ve literally gone through that in every relationship I’ve ever been in, and so have all my “friends,” and it seems very common but no one is talking about it.
I have to say, it was refreshing to have a woman express sympathy for men and what we go through. All too often men get dismissed as "dogs". Most women don't understand and give credit to how much our hormones dictate our thoughts and actions.
I like overall what she is saying, but I don’t and never had 10-20 close “friends”. She lost me there. That is not realistic for many, many people. I liked her explanations of why we need “tribes” etc. The loneliness and the impact the pandemic have left are palpable. I just try to abide by treat others how you would like to be treated.
I always find this "shadow work" stuff, so hilarious. Like people invented these Woo woo words. Just to explain the difference between the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems. It's basically just a difference between our primal and evolved brains. Being able to recognize when you are in fight or flight (sympathetic). The primal brain in the amygdala is the shadow. It's the inner child. Through meditation, bringing yourself into Parasympathetic, you return to the inner parent. The evolved brain. I don't know why they have to give so many names. For the same things, it becomes confusing. Shadow work confuses the whole situation. Just stick to the science people.
I really tried to be open minded to this interview and it has some interesting parts, but her stories all sound like she can do no wrong, in all situations where someone wronged her she was not to blame and she's the great one, the other person is problematic, very unlike other girls vibes...
A speech coach I was working with wrote down the number of times I said "UHM" in a presentation; I immediately corrected that verbal tic. May I suggest to your guest she write down the number of times she said"LIKE" unnecessarily in this interview?
'We don't have instruction for live', we flight blindly'. Poor woman... You don't have instructions, because you throwed them away in the name od false 'freedom'. That's you main problem.
I watched almost every episode here, even the 2.5 hour episodes I watched them with every heart beat! I got attached and couldn’t stop listening, but this one I paused so many times, no offense but this girl is jumping all over the place, she doesn’t get the point across. I couldn’t do passed 28 minutes It took me like 4 days to finish them back and forth assuming maybe she’s got something that will benefit me, but she’s fighting more than she’s talking maybe it’s her way of talking!! Or presenting I don’t know exactly what it is but I do feel too overwhelmed.. sorry, but I wish if you only focused on one specific subject, just talked about it a little bit slower and in a lower voice it would’ve been better.
Trigger warning- I was roofied and raped but I don’t remember it. I woke up and he made me think it was consensual. Went to work and on with my life. I carried it with me for a long time. 15 years later, I did EMDR. It helped to be validated by my counselor and work through it. I still don’t enjoy sex. Be careful, ladies.
Lisa with all due respect. Please for the love of God listen back to your noises, when someone says something that you deem important. Like mmm, mhm, umm, uuu. They are loud, sometimes inappropriate and for me they take away the focus.
I love being alone. Me and my dogs have never been more content and at peace. I believe in finding happiness in yourself. It’s a skill to be honed. Now that I have it, I can explore every facet of my interests, travel, and do anything else I desire. 🤍
Love most of this. But I am a person who definitely wants regular casual sex. I am not looking for a relationship or even friendship when it happens. I want to have the sex and then to part ways. Maybe do it again if it was particularly good. I am an otherwise neurotypical woman. Would I enjoy closer friendships and occasional companionship? Yes, but it's the exception not the rule. I love love love my space. I'm sure someone will let me know how "broken" I am now. Whaddyagonnado.
I can’t imagine giving my body here and there casually. It feels disgusting to me. And It’s not ok random people entering your energetic field and body just like that. It pollutes you and in a long run, will affect your Mind and emotional well being.
WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section, that is someone impersonating me!
Hey Lisa, I was wondering if perhaps in the future, maybe you could have someone on to have a conversation about eating disorders, like anorexia for example. It's talked about so little yet it affects so many people, and it's important to know about it because of how dangerous they are. It's an important topic that somehow is still not properly being discussed. Xx
I really wish this episode talked more about how people are choosing isolation/loneliness or just being set in their ways rather than interacting with other people, trauma aside.
I totally agree, to have friends you must be a friend, and a lot of people are not willing to put in the sacrificial work to be present and active in fulfilling relationships with others.
Well, for me my work is vey social. so I get plenty of interaction with people. Its arms length, but that works for me. No connections, but still talk with and enjoy people for a minute.
Yeah. But i think it's based on reasonable fears that they don't know how to get past, and which likely blinds them to this key point as well.
Well I have always been more unconventional and different and it’s harder for me to find my tribe.
Most people are very mundane and materialistic and I just don’t find them interesting.
Otherwise, I am very social and can talk to anyone. But most relations I find to be draining, lacking depth or some lacking fun.
I totally agree
It wasn't until I was 44 that I was able to heal my sexual trauma and finally learn how to become orgasmic. It was a long journey of celibacy and self reflection and re-regulating my nervous system. To learn how to be in love with life and connected to all of the Universe gave me the serenity and joy I was seeking. Once I found peace and healing within I met my now husband and was just married last year at 50 years old. My heart goes out to anyone suffering in loneliness. May your hearts and lives be filled with love and joy in whatever forms arise.
what a journey... you're so brave! I hope you're proud of yourself 💜
@@stephanie_allen thank you ❤️ I am
So happy for and proud of you ❤
This was such a multi- faceted conversation! You hit on friendship, dating,love, sex, trauma, through the lens of endocrinology and neurobiology which speaks to my educational background but the spiritual side is very important too. I do think there's a huge problem in healthy male female dynamics and Gen z is the culmination of that, I feel bad for them. But we older millennials are also affected.
I clicked on this video because I've definitely been feeling lonely in every way🙁. I've been on a spiritual journey and as you come back to yourself, you start to cut out a lot of people or lose people once you realize they were benefiting from your lack of boundaries or attachment style or trauma. I've cut out family and friends. But what's happened now that I feel emotionally safe in my bubble is that I'm now afraid and resistant to letting people in or dating. It's sad because I have always wanted deep connection more than anything in the world. I'm an INFJ, HSP, Empath and I think I have an avoidant attachment style. I've always felt different. So I just can't do surface level anymore, I can't let just anyone in, I'm not willing to dull, dim or dumb down to fit in. Making friends is hard once you're in your 30s or older. I want to find my tribe but the FEAR and self protection is so strong.
Can you have someone come on to talk about overcoming insecure attachment styles in order to get better relationships.
When ppl learn that opposite Gene's are in the childhood vaxx schedule you will feel scientifically raped...
100% relate
Absolutely 💯 AGREE 👆 I believe a lot of people would be very interested in that topic. 🙏
❤❤❤
Thais Gibson would be a good speaker
I'd like to ask Lisa... Can you perhaps do an interview for women over 50 experiencing loneliness...how to handle being single and not having a partner as they age?
I just assume I will die alone. After childbearing age no currency on the market. Children grow up move away. You are alone. If you invested in a man instead of your own career you will also die broke. I guess I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.. But that’s only my experience… I’m sure others have had much better experiences.. I’m hoping…
30 and already feel that a loving partner is something I can never have.
Want to hear about how to face the life long loneliness aswell.
@@casstay4499 nope, that’s the new normal and what all of us women are experiencing. Literally. It sucks 😢💔
Also on 50 and over on menopause.. health issues and relationships issues and how to over come that
i have never experienced genuine real love from another human. only from cats & from myself.
👏👏👏👏👏yes, true.
Yep... tired of this crap from humans...
Same
Exactly!!!
I told people of my loss and pain because I was lonely and wanted acceptance 😔
It then went from envy and jealousy to pity and more isolation, why bother ,
Humans are looking for someone worse off then them to feel better ,what is love ..!!!!
Bonds with spirit, nature animals, children and yrself not other adults!!!!
The problem with people is they think they need other people to complete them & they do not. God has given you everything you need inside of yourself. Most relationships rob that from you, women want to own men, men want to own women. Learn to love yourself. There is a real beauty in Freedom.
No we are social creatures... You are wrong so completely very wrong😒 God made it that we literally die if we are isolated with no tribe. Do your research.
Not true. We are made to be in unions and social connections. We are not meant to be by ourselves and not needing anyone.
This is the modern BS that drives loneliness and disconnect even further.
Yes, we need to love ourselves and have self worth but we are not meant to be alone. Nor we ever feel complete.
How would children exist without families? Everyone living isolated...
I believe y’all are missing the point of this comment. This is in the context of romantic relationships. Not friends/ family . She’s meaning a partner.
@@86Kera I was meaning a partner so as all replies. We need a partner, we were not made to be alone. We can’t procreate alone either. Everything in nature comes in pairs and completes one another.
Everything in our body and Mind is “designed” to have a partner and to be in partnerships. If someone is complete alone - let them be. But most % of people need a partner. We need love and to be loved and share love. Nothing makes it complete experiencing things by ourselves without a partner.
People who comment like this - are usually bitter and allowed disappointments and heartbreaks harden their heart. Such comments and thinking is a coping mechanism, a denial, a reaction to past pain.
They don’t want to feel pain again so now going “I am happy by myself, I don’t need anyone”. But deep down they are afraid.
This was such a deep topic for me. I have experienced extreme loneliness for the past several years. I really started to believe love was not for me.
10-20 friends? Most people do well to have 3 or 4.
Since I was a kid I always loved and had animals. There was no one else to give me the love I was not getting except my pets. And sometimes my parents took that away from me as well. My parents sucked, I was the mistake by the lake for my mother, she left us, and my father is a sociopath. My brother has his own issues and a little bit of both parents. I no longer will put up with his disrespect. 2 husband's that were not good choices, but I didn't know better. Now I do and can't find anyone. Friends have abandoned me. My son blames me for everything since I divorced his father, even tho i was the only one there and raising him. No, one helped or stepped up, until the hard work was done. He now thinks my brother is the bomb and will probably get hurt or taken advantage of by him. How much pain does one have to go thru? At 55 I'm back to animals and ME. I finally figured out that the love I was looking for or needed just doesn't exist for me. I'm no longer lonely. I take care of me and live the best life I can. My 2 cats give me more than any one ever has, I travel the world, have done things most people never get the chance to. That is what was meant for, and you have to be capable of some unattachment to live that life.
Try Jesus if you have not tried Him before. Jesus is love and if a person does not know the love of Jesus then they will not know how to love you. Hope you find true love soon. 🙏🏾
28 and I'm done. Got dumped two years ago after a 2.5 year relationship . Bad experiences on dating apps ever since. Last guy ended up being a situationship who just wanted a regular sex thing, and he had narcissistic tendencies. First guy I met after finally cutting him off, ended up love bombing and playing me. He quit talking to me after I slept with him. I'm so broken, feel undesirable and unlovable. So cynical and can't trust anyone has serious intentions. My depression and self esteem are worse than ever. I deleted all of the apps. Having a husband and family is important to me but I've just accepted it will never happen.
Its much better to go to church and not allowing sex before marriage. I stopped letting my instincts control me.
Yeah, it’s really rough out here if you desire a genuine and committed relationship. I’ve had the same experiences with online dating. I’m just giving up and focusing on me!❤
And of course none of it was your fault. I mean it's not like you chose those guys. Also what does situationship mean? Getting gaped by 20 dudes ??
Don't think it'll never happen but the APPS aren't it. I had a similar experience from a guy i met IN REAL LIFE - it broke my spirit, sense of self esteem and said the exact same things as you wrote above. It hurts worse, especially when you're a good, honest woman who just wants to find respect, love and marriage. You might be too sad to see it now but when the dust settles, you will have learned to trust your gut, to walk away IMMEDIATELY when you have a gut feeling that something is off, to never give a man you don't know through consistent reliability the benefit of the doubt and you will save your peace moving forward. You will have standards of respect from the beginning that will be unmovable because you have yourself to lose. That's a powerful lesson that I had to learn myself.
There are good men out there but there are a lot more who don't have good intentions and aren't good, empathetic men with solid character. Don't let shitty men make you see the whole world in grey - good men DO exist and it will only take ONE for it to work for you so why can't it ever happen?! You're smarter, more intuitive - pain is the greatest teacher.
I've been there😢 couldn't get out. At 39 I got pregnant without a man and I'm now happy with my 12 month old girl❤ She loves me. It's the first homemade love I experience❤. But I love in Germany and get paid maternity leave for a year. Plus 250€ child money from the government. It makes being a single mom easier her than in the states
I love my solitude, but will always need outside connections. Isolated completely due to a long term narc marriage at the moment. In a remote area with very limited resources. He dumped us here together, then left us without the resolution I didn't know would never come, yet. I filed for divorce immediately after he left working on us. He gave me his answer. He's stealing our four bedroom house while beating me down psychologically, making it impossible to fight him with just the strength of my pinky finger. He's crushed all things good by dumping me with disabilities knowing I can't keep up with cleaning a home. He's laughing all the way to and from court, smelling like a rose.
Please tell me how to make friends in your mid 40s if they are so vital? Working from home. Idk if anyone else feels this way, but it's incredibly difficult to make and maintain friendships these days.
MEETUP it’s an app! I’m 27 and have made friends through there
Its over
Yes, absolutely. I also work from home mostly and also find most people very mundane and don’t find anything in common easily.
Besides most friendships nowadays are very superficial.
Exactly@@trinityp8575
Ppl don't won't to put in the work, real friendship, real love, real connections, being honest, takes work. Can you imagine doing everything humanly possible to have a friend succeed or imagine doing everything possible to see yourself succeed? Selfish creatures we are.😑
Sounds based
I have to point out that women are pressured into being married because society conditioned women to think they're nothing without a man. The problem I see with having timelines and rushing into marriage because everyone else is doing it is you become disconnected with yourself and more worried with outside validation. This creates loneliness in relationships. Loneliness in relationship is way worse than single and lonely because you can lose yourself in relationships making you more disconnected from self.
I think relationships are beautiful, I'm not anti-relationship, I'm just saying. Ladies, pour into your friendships and relationships with family members not just romantic partner.
And feminism brainwashed women into choosing a career instead of marriage and motherhood and encouraged women to be promiscuous.
I loved her!!! Please bring her back again & again!
Ppl need to be taught love but most come from abusive parents no support
I wonder the percentage
I was thinking the same thing. I wasn’t taught anything positive as a kid.
2Tim 3 : 1-5 explains the problem.
@@Autumn_Forest_ 🙋🙏
@@arianamooon 21% 2022
This has nothing to do with actually loving humans, creation, self and God. This is about survival bonding, extracting approval & the illusion of security on a changing, insecure earth. We're here TO love, not demand it like a drug. If we want to extract acceptance & "security," we can join a cult or gang or codependent family. If you want to love, as a grownup soul, you can love others no matter how they do or don't supply the addictive substance of approval. This young lady is growing, so that's wonderful.
Consciousness of Yeshua
Limerence is not LOVE. love is a tapestry we weave over a lifetime
Mirror empathize & validate... 💞
17:30
Babies and children need that security and approval to become loving, productive, healthy adults. They need to learn to love themselves and be their own approval. Thats really hard to do when people are constantly telling you, you are not worthy of love or approval. Someone who is continually emptying their fuel tank and not getting it refilled is not in a healthy relationship, they are a martyr. It's not about love as a drug or being codependent it's about balance. What's healthy. Loving yourself is healthy. Loving others is healthy. Excepting any and all behavior from others, even negative, is not healthy.
Glad I got married young. I don't get lonely often. For a man, that's a huge accomplishment. Also, after all these years I'm still learning my wife.
My sister also married young and recently got divorced at 49. He turned out to be a bad husband in every way, shape and form. I think the important detail is meeting someone who's a genuinely good person as early as possible.
Intimacy is a treasure in a healthy relationship ... 💞
30 and already feel that a loving partner is something I can never have.
Want to hear about how to face the life long loneliness.
Anyone else feels the same？
As a 40 year old, I can say 30 is SO young! I know women in their 70's finding the loves of their life... Stay hopeful and rooted in the knowledge of the beauty of your light and I believe people, love, animals, experiences will come your way 💜
@@stephanie_allen Thank you so much，what you said are so powerful，it‘s just sometimes I get frustrated and not even realizing I also have the light in me.
This is exactly what I need to hear about！Many thanks and hope you living your dream life 40+ to forever！💗✨
@@stephanie_allen you cant get pregnant at 70yrs old. Some people not even at 40. My mom had her menopause at 45. Women need to be aware of this. Very aware.
@@etcwhatever this woman was speaking to finding love and worried about feeling lonely the rest of her life and my comment referred to that. Child bearing is an entirely different topic. You can have love without having children and you can have children without having love. One does not necessitate the other.
@@disco2278 💜💜💜 I would say that’s your homework- when you start feeling despair and sadness and thoughts come in like ‘I’ll never find love..’ shake yourself awake and pull your thoughts and attention to the beauty inside you. It changes how you feel about you, how you express in the world and then people get to feel that too! 💜✨🥰
Having only gravitated toward abusive men, emotionally then physically, I’m too afraid to try again. But every meal alone…the loneliness is brutal
Pick better men.
Pray to God to make you grateful for all you have. Some ppl have no food to eat. Loneliness is beautiful when we pray. Then the noise of people has no attraction. A good friend or two is nice but never 10 or 20.
Corporate Impact has stolen our intimacy...💞 Great segment Ladies
We need to hear the #TRUTH 💞🙋
You don't like Me? (Yep who cares!)
I totally agree with her, there’s a lot of mess up people out here too and how to avoid and. Learn most of it is mental.
Reading all these comments makes me feel I’m not alone
Great topic because LONELINESS is around so much these days for most people. She is right about love & loneliness effects.
I write lots of old fashion letters with stamps (not FB or email) to family and friends. during COVID 19 I made handouts on differ issue and mailed to friends and family. They all laughed at me but did not care. Every 90 days write my family & friends. Most do not write back, but will call.. But my son 30 yrs old kind of loner himself stated he did not want any more letters from me. It hurt me because I do not call him hardly at all ..but I get no Xmas or birthday or Mother s day gifts or even calls. He acts like he detest me but no idea why. I do not understand it but guess he is clinging to his rich step mom. I was great uplifting good moral type of Mother. I think he is mad cause divorced his Dad..if I had not divorced I d be dead now. We just did co parenting in differ homes during his late teens. As an adult he understands nothing but his own way. Now living in new very large city and working but coworkers distant too. I am feeling so distant ready to work home alone/remote. I believe try go to places see people....walking, join book club or create one , penpals, or take a class may help me. I wanted to get a dog but afraid get attached and forget people all together. I should write a book because always wanted too and have great imagination.Thank you for this video!!
Def keep a journal. Seeing the Author in You!;🙋 Go places that house things you Love... Café, Cozy shops, Beautiful galleries, Open Air events... 💞🎶
Im very isolated but joined a prayer group and its truly a joy. I didnt made friends, its recent...but i feel energized. You should def join a group dedicated to one of your interests. Just for the sake of experience. If theres potential friends it will happen
Congrats, you made your son dysfunctional.
Thank you Dr molly for sharing all the aspects of love I never knew... Another FANTASTIC interview Lisa! 🥰
WOW - Molly is soooooo freaking intelligent!! What a beautiful conversation - I learned a ton! Thank you!
Amazing episode, very helpful, thank you 🙏🏻🌹✨🙏🏻
Need more information on where to safely get psychedelic treatments she was mentioning and overall super interested in her take on it - please do another episode!
Fascinating interview! I love the twists and turns and evolution this interview took.
Great interview!!! Thank you Ladies❣️❣️
This was very insightful.
I thoroughly enjoyed this episode.
It took me 3 years to get over my husband leaving - didnt help that I lived overseas during CoVid and locked down
Love your channel thank you much love 😘🥰
have not experienced love. might study this later if opportunity arises somehow.
I think people are trying to put a “band-aid” on the problem. It doesn’t really help to have these things that “help people feel more connected with a partner” when finding a partner is increasingly more difficult. I think the human connection on finding a partner and proper dating needs to be addressed before these can be.
Amazing Dr. Maloof!!! Bravoooo!
Ppl need mind own business especially family. Jealous woman n coworkers too much chaos
If you're the one inciting jealousy? May Almighty Yah repay 🙏
ps. my ex had a 2 yr old by the time our divorce was final
After discovering 35 years on my husband turned into the worst non stop covert narcissistic sociopath, I am looking for mutual friendship going forward. We're divorcing at 40 years. A narc could very easily shelf it and care less, moving on. Where the empath hangs on to the good parts and memories, severing becomes painful.
Good job on picking a husband.
Great info!!! Thank you! My only 2 cents being older and experiencing things myself; If a guy is on a date, just ended a relationship with a female that i recently met; i can SEE the red flags from a million miles away and there’s nothing in that man that I’d personally want to know any more of. I can tell by the way he is so casual with of ya we broke up, I’m on this date, hey you want to go on a date- I’d be “busy” and “not available” because that guy was a serial dater and screams drama. I’d rather keep my head down and keep peace with females that were even vaguely being introduced and meeting until i really knew that whole scene and had all the information. I think that’s something we miss when we’re younger females and that guy wasn’t worth the potential drama. He wasn’t looking for anything other than seeing women and i could’ve seen that a million miles away with the information i have now. Good life lessons for ladies trying to find their way with dating and interactions with other women.
It's females like you that make other females single. Life is about taking risk. You have to open yourself up to allow someone in. I am not taking about sleeping with everyone either.
Oh yes, my ex wanted to destroy me , so he made the rumours everywhere because I left him and he prooved it was good decision.
So thanks for sharing that!
Whos got the money to throw dinner parties? What working person has the time or gas money to hang out with 5 social groups? What poor working single mother is gonna hang with her poor working neighbors? This is a rich girls chat, not for single mother full time working, cleaning, child nurturing in the hour and a half after work and before bedtime. This video feel sooo out of touch with "not rich-girl" experiences. This video made me feel so inadequate being a poor woman with limited time and money and energy, what are poor working women with children supposed to do about loneliness? This woman in the video seems like shes never been middle class or known anyone middle class who works a "job", not a "career".
She have got so much wesdom. Greatfull to have conversations
Informative interview! Thank you
How do you find that first person to make friends with when you try everything and no one reciprocates your connection?
I’d also love to hear stories about men with low sex drives and women with high sex drives and the pain of men with NPD/BPD/cluster b issues using withholding sex as a weapon, because I’ve literally gone through that in every relationship I’ve ever been in, and so have all my “friends,” and it seems very common but no one is talking about it.
Waoo, I love this episode!!!!!
Great info and I'm sorry for asking this..but....what is Dr Molly wearing???????????
I have to say, it was refreshing to have a woman express sympathy for men and what we go through. All too often men get dismissed as "dogs". Most women don't understand and give credit to how much our hormones dictate our thoughts and actions.
Everybody has a shadow!😮😮😮😂😂❤❤❤❤❤
I like overall what she is saying, but I don’t and never had 10-20 close “friends”.
She lost me there. That is not realistic for many, many people.
I liked her explanations of why we need “tribes” etc.
The loneliness and the impact the pandemic have left are palpable.
I just try to abide by treat others how you would like to be treated.
Just wow! I feel like this is a big issue in the children of immigrants
She should date Andrew Huberman.They’d make a cute couple ❤
@@priyankadeyray243 Oh really?! I couldn’t find any information about his wife and kids.
Or may b I was wrong, he is probably not married
Wow Lisa, love the big hair!😁
I always find this "shadow work" stuff, so hilarious. Like people invented these Woo woo words. Just to explain the difference between the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems. It's basically just a difference between our primal and evolved brains. Being able to recognize when you are in fight or flight (sympathetic). The primal brain in the amygdala is the shadow. It's the inner child. Through meditation, bringing yourself into Parasympathetic, you return to the inner parent. The evolved brain. I don't know why they have to give so many names. For the same things, it becomes confusing. Shadow work confuses the whole situation. Just stick to the science people.
Shes high as a kite 😂😂😂 that hair cut OMG thanks for the laugh 😂
I really tried to be open minded to this interview and it has some interesting parts, but her stories all sound like she can do no wrong, in all situations where someone wronged her she was not to blame and she's the great one, the other person is problematic, very unlike other girls vibes...
Hell yeah when they mean and they are angry in isolation and aggressive and not loving who the hell wants to have sex with that I get turned off !
A speech coach I was working with wrote down the number of times I said "UHM" in a presentation; I immediately corrected that verbal tic. May I suggest to your guest she write down the number of times she said"LIKE" unnecessarily in this interview?
She’s not a speech coach & I think she did a Great job!! 🤍💯
'We don't have instruction for live', we flight blindly'. Poor woman... You don't have instructions, because you throwed them away in the name od false 'freedom'. That's you main problem.
She lost me with iwaska. A lot ppl lost their plot with iwaska
Ayahuasca
It’s really sickening how people really think they can survive alone ‼️‼️ you can’t
Dogs are best
Omg is like he is shallow and disconnected and is crazy 😜 he was really not concerned about you getting it they are selfish! It’s one sided!
20:00 hardest J O B You'll ever do !
So validating the acknowledgement of the not making decisions under the influence of OXYTOCIN™ lol ⚠️
25:00 check list #Trust
27:00 Love is a force field.
SCAM
I watched almost every episode here, even the 2.5 hour episodes I watched them with every heart beat! I got attached and couldn’t stop listening, but this one I paused so many times, no offense but this girl is jumping all over the place, she doesn’t get the point across. I couldn’t do passed 28 minutes It took me like 4 days to finish them back and forth assuming maybe she’s got something that will benefit me, but she’s fighting more than she’s talking maybe it’s her way of talking!! Or presenting I don’t know exactly what it is but I do feel too overwhelmed.. sorry, but I wish if you only focused on one specific subject, just talked about it a little bit slower and in a lower voice it would’ve been better.
Trigger warning- I was roofied and raped but I don’t remember it. I woke up and he made me think it was consensual. Went to work and on with my life. I carried it with me for a long time. 15 years later, I did EMDR. It helped to be validated by my counselor and work through it. I still don’t enjoy sex. Be careful, ladies.
Spiritism Pharmakia It's not healthy
Hehe she sounds like Amber Heard …
😏👍
Lisa with all due respect. Please for the love of God listen back to your noises, when someone says something that you deem important. Like mmm, mhm, umm, uuu. They are loud, sometimes inappropriate and for me they take away the focus.
I love being alone. Me and my dogs have never been more content and at peace. I believe in finding happiness in yourself. It’s a skill to be honed. Now that I have it, I can explore every facet of my interests, travel, and do anything else I desire. 🤍
Love most of this. But I am a person who definitely wants regular casual sex. I am not looking for a relationship or even friendship when it happens. I want to have the sex and then to part ways. Maybe do it again if it was particularly good. I am an otherwise neurotypical woman. Would I enjoy closer friendships and occasional companionship? Yes, but it's the exception not the rule. I love love love my space. I'm sure someone will let me know how "broken" I am now. Whaddyagonnado.
I can’t imagine giving my body here and there casually.
It feels disgusting to me. And It’s not ok random people entering your energetic field and body just like that. It pollutes you and in a long run, will affect your Mind and emotional well being.
Haram