Aventus' lack of compliance throughout the video was quite entertaining indeed. He's like "I did not, nor cannot, consent to you laying a hand on me let alone dragging all the way to the place that practically made me go mad, steal my mother's corpse and ultimately perform the Black Sacrament!"
Another lazy npc, wanting some random adventurer to do their work >:v Could also just be he doesn't want to pay for the crime afterwards. His allowance probably wouldn't cover the 40 gold in murder.
Aventus' blank expression as you manhandle him across the map was so funny, like you're damn near drowning him and he's just looking at you like "can you not"
For anyone that may not have realized yet. You can give your adopted children daggers and they just start going ham on the wooden dummy in your house. It's hilarious.
Get one of those old bas- down and see the world again Staying cooped up on top of a mountain cant be good for your health, especially at that age Also shouting down whenever ya want something just isnt practical
Would be easier to just throw the Greybeards off the throat of the world. Heck, if he could ragdoll one of them in midair and had no shout cooldown, he could probably FusRoDah the greybeard into Whiterun without him ever touching the ground.
It’s not that short. Not only is there the 7000 steps, but if you’re heading to white run, you will be on the opposite side of the mountain, so you’d then have to travel even further.
@@stoopidapples1596: You can see Whiterun quite clearly from the top of the 7000 steps though. You just need some means of surviving the fall, and you can jump right off the mountain and land in that bandit mine just over the bridge where the river passes.
"I might have the hands for two children, but I only have the patience for one." I've never heard anything so relatable that could also be used against you in a court of law...
HE CAME THROUGH I CANT BELIEVE IT Edit:if you're up for more torture drag lord harkon to the dawnguard tower, I'm sorry if you decide to go through with this
Imagine you escape from an abusive owner at the orphanage, ridding yourself from a truly evil person and wishing for a league of assassins to kill her, and then this man comes in, dragging you by the ear back to the orphanage, saying "aye cmon ya wee fuck, we're taekin ya to riften and t' graelod"
So invested in these dragging Skyrim road trips. considering the NPCs spend most of their time staring blankly and walking the wrong way, there is an awful lot of banter and story 😂😂
Look, I know you may have been arrested by the guards for this again, but really, at this point it's tradition! Besides, Aventus' problem with the orphanage was Grelod, and she's dead now, so I think that makes this road trip a double success!
@@TheLaughingSimon Look, it’s not your fault Grelod was a frail old woman. She already had one foot in the grave and you helped her put the other foot in as well. In my eye you did her a favor.
Lol 😂 the fact that you referenced the other characters who “enjoyed” their walk and had raved about it. 🤣 oh goodness thank you again for the laughter.
I love how you're treating this whole thing as though you were trying to teach a kid you adopted, some mildly warpped but in all reality well intentioned, form of morality and the Eventus is treating you the way any reluctant as hell preteen would treat any kind of form of authority.
This presents an interesting moral dilemma. Is it technically kidnapping if the child you're taking is an orphan? Even if you're taking him to an orphanage? Next time just stick some super glue on your virtual palm and drag him with extra gusto lmao I love this shit
Hearing the constant stream of Scottish commentary is making me laugh so hard. "Och, you are doing so weel, look how you...no, no, no, where are you going now?"
Please drag me across the map, daddy Simon. ... I'm so sorry, I had to. 🤣🤣 In all seriousness, I am binging all your videos right now and loving them. You're so entertaining. (:
I can't tell if this guy is Glaswegian or from somewhere else in the Central belt, but its really nice to watch someone with my own accent- I used "Chips" to refer to crisps the other day after watching multiple hours of american cooking instructions and I've never felt more ashamed in my life!
If I've learned anything from watching Skyrim series on TH-cam all these years, is that if it involves Aventus, to watch it immediately, before TH-cam get's it's jimmies rustled. Which means this is sure to be a banger. lol
"Talos, give me strength!" "I might have the hands for 2 children, but I've only the patience fer 1" 🤣😂🤣 Never a more relatable Skyrim video has been made, and it's the first of yours I'm watching ~ bravo! 👏👏👏
4:44 - Ironically one of the things Grelod did teach the children at the orphanage about was the "bad touch" and how to make a quick getaway when it happens.
Make a video dragging the leader of the Dark Brotherhood to that guy at the Dragonbridge, and vice versa. Also, drag that one women that owns the brewery in Riften to her competitor's place near Whiterun. A third idea would be to drag the leader of The Blades on over to see Parthanax and show him that he is a cool dragon and does not need to be offed. A fourth idea is to bring the vampire leader and Dawnguard leader to meet each other at their respective castles. And lastly, drag the leaders of the Companians and College of Winterhold to meet each other to solve the werewolf curse problem.
When you’ve been watching an Irishman destroying Sims4 (Call Me Kevin) and then below you find a Scotsman dragging children by the face😭😂😂😂 Subscribed!
I like how half of these videos are Simon talking to the npc, trying to convincing them why they want to go whenever he's dragging them to., then having a heart to heart with them, to eventually losing his mind in frustration :V
I like to imagine the reason he usually loses grip is because he keeps insisting on palming his head like a basketball, instead of like, grabbing his hand or something normal
Hold on... right at the end... you smashed the furniture! I didn't know there was a mod like that. That is going on my to-do list to add to the mod-list!
@@LybertyZ: It is an older version of the PLANCK mod, which generally lets you grab things, brush things, push things around. In the current version if you try to grab people and drag them, they break free almost instantly and get annoyed.
I cant believe ive only just found this channel this is pure comedy gold i could watch these all day! I know youre probably no doing these anymore but would be interesting seeing Arngeir the Greybeard being taken to Sky Haven Temple to Delphine or even taking Delphine or Esbern to the Thalmor Embassy
Wow that looks exceptionally annoying. Glad he made it! The end was amazing, Grelolt must have very bad back problems or something. Can't wait for more videos!
We just buried my grandad today as of 12/18/22. He passed on the 15th. I'm up late thinking about him watching your videos. When I first discovered your videos, he was still here, but struggling on hospice. Your videos always make me laugh. It's really helping. Thank you so much. Congrats on 19k subscribers. You deserve it. Your channel keeps growing more and more, so quickly. Keep up the good work.
I've never seen your vids, never even heard of you. Not even sure how this ended up being recommended. But you sir have earned a sub and a like. This shit had me rolling!!!
The Bandit Fort battle while listening to Octopath Traveller music reminds me how hyped I am for the sequel! This also makes me wonder how would it be to play as one of the heroes in Skyrim 🤔
This music reminds me of FFIX. The one with Zidane and Steiner and Vivi. Works so well with this content, plus an added bonus of nostalgia. Thank you for this, it's perfectly hilarious.
There was a big ol debate in the comments as to whether dragging Aventus back to a horrible woman was a good idea. I was pro-"aventus needs to stop being such a milk drinker and face Grelod himself"
I am so glad I stumbled on this video, I needed a good laugh and you delivered gloriously! Thank you Simon, hope you have a great holiday, and you got my sub. If your other videos are as good as this one I think you will be my new favorite channel.
My patrons and TH-cam members enabled this. Blame them.
I will be perfectly happy to take all responsibility for the child abuse your about to enable. No bones about it.
Wtf you have 18k subscriber
@@jemleith3263 You left out the word only.
Enable them for more of my new favorite Skyrim TH-camr? Um sure.
You should have done these dragger videos as a Draugr?
Now drag Delphine to Paarthurnax to apologize for asking you to kill him
Nah, should've drag her to the Thalmor embassy
Yessss!
Yesss, this.
Yes. Then fus ro dah her off the mountain.
I wonder if you can drag Parthunaax. Drag him around skyrim to let people know he isnt as bad as he looks
"I may have the hands for two children, but I only have the patience for one."
Lmfao, the sentiment of mothers everywhere.
I also love how earlier “The one thing that’s gunna beat your stubbornness, My stubbornness.”
Any time a mother needs to go shopping with her kids: “Talos, give me strength…”
Yep, but they don't have the hands for two, they don't even have enough for one
This child is more assertive than Ulfric and Tullius taken together, impressive.
Aventus' lack of compliance throughout the video was quite entertaining indeed. He's like "I did not, nor cannot, consent to you laying a hand on me let alone dragging all the way to the place that practically made me go mad, steal my mother's corpse and ultimately perform the Black Sacrament!"
I mean... thats not a high bar lets be honest . . .
@@IndigoWolfTail You make a good point. I'd fight for my life too to avoid going back to Grelod
You are gross
@@RollerBaller Grelod is a force to be reckoned with
With Aventus' ability with a dagger and his skill to disappear without a moments notice you'd think he'd kill Grelod himself
Another lazy npc, wanting some random adventurer to do their work >:v
Could also just be he doesn't want to pay for the crime afterwards.
His allowance probably wouldn't cover the 40 gold in murder.
Dude is an Assassin in the making. No wonder he performs the black sacrament. He probably will join the dark brotherhood later on in life.
@@Firestar4041 he might be able to sell that lovely plate for 40 gold.
@@viderevero1338 Elder Scrolls 6 better has him as an very old member of the dark brotherhood, just for the giggles
@@Firestar4041 killing geeked isn’t actually a crime no matter who watches the murder it won’t be seen as a crime
Aventus' blank expression as you manhandle him across the map was so funny, like you're damn near drowning him and he's just looking at you like "can you not"
Kid's born to be a badass
@@casvandijck9338nope!😊
@@casvandijck9338nope
@@casvandijck9338nope
@@casvandijck9338 Or he was pushed into being a "badass" by the orphanage!
simon has gone from kidnapping furious warlords to kidnapping demon children
😂😂
Can't really tell a difference
Glasgow, goven 😂
He's a saint!
For anyone that may not have realized yet. You can give your adopted children daggers and they just start going ham on the wooden dummy in your house. It's hilarious.
Give em Enchanted daggers with 4 digit damage, and raise a war criminal.
Give em' a paralyze enchantment and see how quickly they use it on you when you stand too close
Has anyone given their Skyrim kids Nettlebane?
@@cynthmcgpoet I'm playing on a PS4 and it's not giving the option
@@kylethomas9130 Raise a war criminal has me rolling 💀
The VR closeups really send home how much the Skyrim children look like they're made out of play-doh
My beautiful root vegetable boy.
I know this would be a much shorter roadtrip, but you could drag one of the Greybeards down the 7,000 steps and to Whiterun.
Get one of those old bas- down and see the world again
Staying cooped up on top of a mountain cant be good for your health, especially at that age
Also shouting down whenever ya want something just isnt practical
Would be easier to just throw the Greybeards off the throat of the world. Heck, if he could ragdoll one of them in midair and had no shout cooldown, he could probably FusRoDah the greybeard into Whiterun without him ever touching the ground.
@@Mawkatz agreed!
It’s not that short. Not only is there the 7000 steps, but if you’re heading to white run, you will be on the opposite side of the mountain, so you’d then have to travel even further.
@@stoopidapples1596: You can see Whiterun quite clearly from the top of the 7000 steps though. You just need some means of surviving the fall, and you can jump right off the mountain and land in that bandit mine just over the bridge where the river passes.
"I might have the hands for two children, but I only have the patience for one."
I've never heard anything so relatable that could also be used against you in a court of law...
He says that right after grabbing
the girl in the tits.
He just not want to get arrested.
Pfftt I lost it when I head that
I’m just holding my breath for him to drag the Riverwood chicken to Sovngarde 😂
When you were giving him a bath and he took off running the first chance he got, that was glorious 🤣
4:46 He was out of there 😂
He didn't even run, more like glided away.
@@emismpunk se😢
@@wallywallace2184 Must be the slippery soap. Not to be confused with the slippery slope that is washing children on youtube.
So in-character for a child
HE CAME THROUGH I CANT BELIEVE IT
Edit:if you're up for more torture drag lord harkon to the dawnguard tower, I'm sorry if you decide to go through with this
The distance between the vampire castle and fort dawnguard is just absurd. On survival, I gave in and got an unlock fast travel mod.
Omg that would be perfect please do it
okay stay calm guys but we might of killed Simon from holding down a button now
He should be moved to the Soul Cairn, let him rule there.
Imagine you escape from an abusive owner at the orphanage, ridding yourself from a truly evil person and wishing for a league of assassins to kill her,
and then this man comes in, dragging you by the ear back to the orphanage, saying "aye cmon ya wee fuck, we're taekin ya to riften and t' graelod"
All while he keeps complaining and rambling about something because you can only understand like 30% of it.
A bearded man with a boy, killing everything. this is basically god of war, our Scottish God of War.
YES
“BOY”
on his way to an orphanage
(Inhales) BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lets go, BOY.
So invested in these dragging Skyrim road trips. considering the NPCs spend most of their time staring blankly and walking the wrong way, there is an awful lot of banter and story 😂😂
Never thought scottish man playing vr skyrim would be so entertaining. Keep up the good work.
Look, I know you may have been arrested by the guards for this again, but really, at this point it's tradition! Besides, Aventus' problem with the orphanage was Grelod, and she's dead now, so I think that makes this road trip a double success!
ALL PART OF THE PLAN
@@TheLaughingSimon Look, it’s not your fault Grelod was a frail old woman. She already had one foot in the grave and you helped her put the other foot in as well. In my eye you did her a favor.
This gives me Kratos and Atreus vibes but Mimir does all the talking.
Lmao 😂
"Disappointing everyone is part of adulthood," laughing so hard, but it's true! 🤣
Next he should drag Harkon to the dawngaurd to apologize for the whole killing and sucking peoples blood thing that he's been doing.
Lol 😂 the fact that you referenced the other characters who “enjoyed” their walk and had raved about it. 🤣 oh goodness thank you again for the laughter.
As I was watching this I was wondering, "How is Simon going to make it so everyone turns on him at the end again?" Sure enough, you delivered, LMAO!!!
This was the first time I intentionally caused chaos at the end and it still went horribly wrong 😭
i think this might be the most accurate depiction of going places with a child ive ever seen in a video game
Oh God, your accent definitely makes this way funnies than it should be, real disadisappointed parent vibes too
He's just a wee bairn! What were ye thinking, dragging the poor lad through a bandits fort like that?! Hahaha, I loved every minute of this, Simon
I love how Grelod's whole purpose in the game is to be murdered by the player early on so she dies if you so much as touch her
I think she only has ten hitpoints
14:52 I like how the Scottish “We’re built different.” hits different.
You should defiantly drag Delphine to Paarthurnax!
I love how you're treating this whole thing as though you were trying to teach a kid you adopted, some mildly warpped but in all reality well intentioned, form of morality and the Eventus is treating you the way any reluctant as hell preteen would treat any kind of form of authority.
Me: "Let's hope Simon thought ahead and cleared out Fort Greenwall."
16:51 Agh noooo...
Thinking ahead ruins all the fun!
I had so much hope and then the ambush came
This is what we call a "great idea".
The silly little bugger!
Crusty?!
Crusty!
He's a good lad, just misguided and maybe a necromancer.
Lol I was just thinking Simon and Crusty would get along famously. Two truly revolutionary thinkers in the ever important subject of VR parenting.
@@TheLaughingSimon “Misguided and maybe a Necromancer.”
Exactly. Silly little bugger!
This presents an interesting moral dilemma. Is it technically kidnapping if the child you're taking is an orphan? Even if you're taking him to an orphanage? Next time just stick some super glue on your virtual palm and drag him with extra gusto lmao I love this shit
If this series continues, you will have mental breakdowns every time you see a hill outside xd
Hearing the constant stream of Scottish commentary is making me laugh so hard. "Och, you are doing so weel, look how you...no, no, no, where are you going now?"
Would it be "Dragging [character] across Skyrim" without ending with a fight with guards?
everything about this new way to kill grelod is hilarious: from the accidental nature of it to the hard fall that followed
The way you spoke to the child was hilarious I now desperately need to see you with a child follower mod! 😂
A take your children to work mod sounds dangerous, but realistic for several dragonborn parents 😆
I about died laughing. Been haveing a blast since I found this channel. Keep up the wonderfull work.
Please drag me across the map, daddy Simon.
... I'm so sorry, I had to. 🤣🤣
In all seriousness, I am binging all your videos right now and loving them. You're so entertaining. (:
😂
I can't tell if this guy is Glaswegian or from somewhere else in the Central belt, but its really nice to watch someone with my own accent- I used "Chips" to refer to crisps the other day after watching multiple hours of american cooking instructions and I've never felt more ashamed in my life!
Ironically both sides use chips and crisps wrongly, for the most part.
@@OmniscientWarrior So "Not the way I say it" = "wrong", eh?
This is basically my drunk dad taking me to school,the scenic route.
Not even 10 seconds into the video and I'm already laughing, you know this is top quality content
If I've learned anything from watching Skyrim series on TH-cam all these years, is that if it involves Aventus, to watch it immediately, before TH-cam get's it's jimmies rustled. Which means this is sure to be a banger. lol
No he's a kid
Dragging Delphine to Paarthurnax would be an adventure, I’m sure. Maybe then she would see that he’s all right
Its always the small TH-camrs that are absolutely hilarious.
"Talos, give me strength!"
"I might have the hands for 2 children, but I've only the patience fer 1"
🤣😂🤣
Never a more relatable Skyrim video has been made, and it's the first of yours I'm watching ~ bravo! 👏👏👏
4:44 - Ironically one of the things Grelod did teach the children at the orphanage about was the "bad touch" and how to make a quick getaway when it happens.
All i can see is that a child is screaming as a large nord just grabs his face, yelling about an orphanage.
That moment when he reached to the sky for strength 🤣
“You are a miserable little wain” 😂😂😂😂
Am in tears
I have NEVER laughed sooo hard in my life!!! Thank you soo much for delivering yet another brilliant video Simon. You are the GOAT
Make a video dragging the leader of the Dark Brotherhood to that guy at the Dragonbridge, and vice versa. Also, drag that one women that owns the brewery in Riften to her competitor's place near Whiterun. A third idea would be to drag the leader of The Blades on over to see Parthanax and show him that he is a cool dragon and does not need to be offed. A fourth idea is to bring the vampire leader and Dawnguard leader to meet each other at their respective castles. And lastly, drag the leaders of the Companians and College of Winterhold to meet each other to solve the werewolf curse problem.
nevermind that, drag the surprise at honeymead into Whiterun
Now I'm inspired to beat Grelod down with a live orphan.
Love the music lol suikoden at 10:40 if im right gave me childhood flashbacks keep up the good work 👏
Guard: “What are you doing that for?”
FOR CONTENT!!! Lmao
“I may have the hands for 2 children but I only have the patience for one” 😂😂😂 this is gold
When you’ve been watching an Irishman destroying Sims4 (Call Me Kevin) and then below you find a Scotsman dragging children by the face😭😂😂😂 Subscribed!
That is definitely the connection TH-cam used to recommend this channel to me
I like how half of these videos are Simon talking to the npc, trying to convincing them why they want to go whenever he's dragging them to., then having a heart to heart with them, to eventually losing his mind in frustration :V
"disappointing everybody is also part of adulthood"
too true matey, too true! lol
I like to imagine the reason he usually loses grip is because he keeps insisting on palming his head like a basketball, instead of like, grabbing his hand or something normal
This is my favorite kind of content. Absolute chaos
It really changed the scale of the map when instead of sprinting on a horse you're walking and stopping every 3 secs
Haven't laughed out loud at a video so much in a while lmao great work. I'm about to use this video to practice your accent for a D&D character lol
I really love those drag videos. They always fill my heart with joy 😂
"Imma wee bell end." My god that's amazing.
Hold on... right at the end... you smashed the furniture! I didn't know there was a mod like that. That is going on my to-do list to add to the mod-list!
Nexus is down for me at the moment but the mod is Destructible Skyrim
@@TheLaughingSimon Nice! There were several by that name, but I assume it is the object replacer one, or whatever it was called.
Is the ability to grab and drag people in the VR version also a mod?
@@LybertyZ: It is an older version of the PLANCK mod, which generally lets you grab things, brush things, push things around. In the current version if you try to grab people and drag them, they break free almost instantly and get annoyed.
@@SotiCoto Thanks!
I cant believe ive only just found this channel this is pure comedy gold i could watch these all day!
I know youre probably no doing these anymore but would be interesting seeing Arngeir the Greybeard being taken to Sky Haven Temple to Delphine or even taking Delphine or Esbern to the Thalmor Embassy
Wow that looks exceptionally annoying. Glad he made it! The end was amazing, Grelolt must have very bad back problems or something. Can't wait for more videos!
I have no idea why this is so intertaining. LOL The VR makes it so much better.
Lol Poor Simon. May the Nine bless u for sticking with it.
Merry Christmas! Your present? A new member! TY for doing this one -- lots of requests for it!
Easily the most requested video I've had. Cheers for the present Steve, hope Santa was good to you!
We just buried my grandad today as of 12/18/22. He passed on the 15th. I'm up late thinking about him watching your videos. When I first discovered your videos, he was still here, but struggling on hospice. Your videos always make me laugh. It's really helping. Thank you so much. Congrats on 19k subscribers. You deserve it. Your channel keeps growing more and more, so quickly. Keep up the good work.
Humbled to be able to put a smile on your face when you need it most 💙🙏
wishing you the best, i know how it feels to lose family
@@PandaOfRed368 Thank you. He was staying in our house in the room across from me. It still feels like he's there, but I know he's not. It's weird.
Plot twist, the giant and mammoth were trying to keep ya on track.
I really wasn't planning on watching this whole video but it was too funny!
I've never seen your vids, never even heard of you. Not even sure how this ended up being recommended. But you sir have earned a sub and a like. This shit had me rolling!!!
Same!!
Daddy Simon and the Bandit King! 😂😂😂
He is not a bandit!
I have no idea what I just watched, but I enjoyed every second of it.
The Bandit Fort battle while listening to Octopath Traveller music reminds me how hyped I am for the sequel!
This also makes me wonder how would it be to play as one of the heroes in Skyrim 🤔
This music reminds me of FFIX. The one with Zidane and Steiner and Vivi. Works so well with this content, plus an added bonus of nostalgia. Thank you for this, it's perfectly hilarious.
It is from that game
I wouldn't say daddy Simon but Uncle Simon has a good ring to it.
I am so glad I found this channel!
Gotta love how his head fits perfectly on the palm of Dovahkin's hand
Yeeesss! So glad you loaded up, Brah! Love watching your stuff!
How do you just unleash absolute dad talk for solid 25 minutes of video xD brilliant
Not a dad
Holy cow. Youre growing so fast! I lovw to watch small creators grow like this!
There was a big ol debate in the comments as to whether dragging Aventus back to a horrible woman was a good idea. I was pro-"aventus needs to stop being such a milk drinker and face Grelod himself"
He's a kid, he doesn't need to kill anyone!
@@Old_World_Nostalgia but he SHOULD
@@DropsOfMars Then all the kids can kill.
@@DropsOfMars I think Mjoll should help him tattle, and keep the poor kid's hands clean!
@@DropsOfMars He's a KID!
This is amazing, I just got done watching three other videos of yours and I knew that I had to subscribe. Keep doing these please😂
Love watching you drag people around 🤣
I am so glad I stumbled on this video, I needed a good laugh and you delivered gloriously! Thank you Simon, hope you have a great holiday, and you got my sub. If your other videos are as good as this one I think you will be my new favorite channel.
I've always considered waterboarding children a principle of any decent TH-cam channel so I appreciate this alot.
Under rated and totally binge worth content, I’ve been dying laughing for days now, THANK YOU CAP’T!
So many quotable moments in these videos, never gets old lol
Love your use of Final Fantasy 9 music through the whole video! It made it just that much more engaging for me.
Drag a guard to high hrothgar so they can see if maybe they're dragonborn and just don't know it yet.
Imperial child gets dragged through Skyrim by a savage reachman. (4E 201 colorized.)
"God of war looking sick"
This is the best skyrim content I've seen in ages 😂
So this is what it's like to be a truancy officer in Skyrim.