You don't suck at homemaking... you're just doing this ONE THING wrong. 😬
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 มิ.ย. 2024
- The hidden truth behind homemaking, why it feels so hard and exactly how to fix that!
#simpleliving #homemakertips #basicskills
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The hidden truth behind homemaking, why it feels so hard and exactly how to fix that! 💗
#simpleliving #homemakertips #basicskills 🔥If you want help developing your MDV, and 3 Routines in under 90 minutes,
use code: WISH to get 40% OFF the workshop: bit.ly/3UZHjPP
Years ago, as a mother who worked 8-5 outside the home, I struggled with everything after hours. What was most important to me was spending those three hours after to make dinner for my two children, and then helping with homework and getting them ready for bed with reading time. And this was before sports and ballet. My house was a wreck and the laundry piled up until the weekend. An older neighbor friend gave me the best advice not to feel guilty because there would come a day when the kids could help with chores and later be gone and I would have all the time in the world to clean to have a perfect home. My kids would not remember the mess but the time I spent with them. When my kids went off to college and the house was perfect with minimal laundry, I remembered my old friend’s advice and missed those messy days.
Wow, this is actual meaningful information, not just TH-cam BS from someone who's run out of content ideas. I really appreciate this.
I like to separate the terms “homemaker” and “housekeeper”. When I think of homemaking, I think of the softer side of being in charge of a home (choosing furniture, decorations, baking and cooking for fun). When I think of housekeeping, I think of the gritty stuff ( laundry, daily cooking, cleaning, unending cycle of sweeping and mopping). I love home making but housekeeping is so hard. If I had a maid I could focus on actual homemaking 😅
That! 👏🏻👏🏻
You guys! My kids are now 10, 7, and 5. I remember telling myself not to forget what it was like when they were all super little. Oh my gosh, it was all consuming. What was so hard was keeping up with all the cleaning and dishes and laundry, sleep, and my own hygiene lol! I hated it when older women would try to tell me what they are doing NOW to manage those things and that I should be doing what they’re doing. But they all have amnesia and forgot what it was like to have a bunch of babies. Their methods would not work. I haven’t forgotten! But now that my kids are older, I no longer struggle as much with all the house chores because the kids are old enough to do them with me. The struggles are different now that they are all older, I’m homeschooling, they are in activities and I’m running around, while being an introvert 😅 So it didn’t get easier necessarily, just different! And I’ve learned to give myself grace for where we are at as a family. Not to compare to others.
Great advice Angela! Surveys have shown the highest category of depression is in women in late 30s. It is from on-going feelings of guilt over working all day and still not doing all they felt they should have done. Yes...do the dailys then decide what's most important to you. And having some days when only the dailys get done is such good advice....grace grace! I'm 60...raised 7 children and you are a great encourager to women!
Being a teen mom and growing up quicker then I could process I look to people like you for ideas on how to parent, take care of the home etc! I'm 28 now but still feel like I need to be learning from more experienced moms. I take bits and pieces of all the ideas and advice.
Might need to put this on repeat every morning 😜 Reflection is a HUGE part to keep a healthy mindset and good heart posture ♥️
Amen!!
Omg you almost just labled me... breastfeeding twins, 5kids under 7! Hubby works 60+hrs and working on his masters 😅
Why I began following you... homeschool content, why I keep following...bc of your wonderful tips and if you can do it with 8 kids and twins I can do 7!
Love your pep talks ❤
Oh my goodness I got teary listening to this. Pregnant with our third, with a 2 and 4 yo. Hubby works long hours and we don't have much support. Homeschooling our eldest. Just lost my job.
I've not been as onto the house as I like to be. But this is helpful to think about prioritising in different seasons ☀️
So sorry that you are going through such a tough season. Praying for you! 🙏🏼
Pretty sure this video changed my life and outlook on motherhood forever, thank you Angela! ❤ I’ve been breastfeeding for almost 4 years (2 years with my middle and right away with my now one and a half year old) and my oldest just turned 6, so for awhile my three were under 6 years old. I was struggling so much, juggling the younger ones when I’d drop off/pick up my kindergartner or visit her at school. Like, why weren’t any of the other school parents looking crazy and overwhelmed like me? I gave up social media this year to stop the happy scrolling and comparison, but I still find myself thinking oh I should be baking homemade muffins instead of buying prepackaged snacks… oh I should be going to the salon and getting my nails done regularly, I should this and that. But no. I should just know thy self. Pick a lane. Give myself grace. Focus on my priorities and what matters most to me. Thank you for this message ❤❤
Highly highly recommend reading The Lazy Genius if you need more info regarding what matters and priorities. It is an excellent book. Plus her podcast is awesome!
I have definitely neglected to honestly evaluate what I’m juggling. My husband has recently been diagnosed with cancer, and beginning treatment has been really difficult on all of us. I’ve wanted so badly to keep things “normal” for the kids… but I simply cant
Amazing video, and that homemade bread doesn’t left my head😅.
So encouraging,I had to stop doing any hobbies and just trying to go through each day with the strong will baby , while have no family or friends , as I’m in a new country.. but yea every time I look at other people.. seems like no one struggles so bad , and i would wander why I can’t put it together..
Every person have their own circumstances,we definitely need to realize that more
Your saving my sanity in my current season of being a home maker, and not only allowing me the permission to say it's not working but how to move past that shame and guilt to start creating a better season.
Agreed. It's so important to acknowledge our weaknesses but also not dwell there. Wishing you the best!
We are definitely living in the minimum area right now, I’m forever looking for someone’s home life/ home school/ home making that looks like ours
I’m disabled, both my younger children are neurodivergent- I loved your comment about cooking from scratch & baking bread because in my head that’s what I ‘should’ be doing 🤦🏻♀️ I’ve just bought your course x need my own why not what ifs x
Angela you're a gift! Your reminders are always timely!
Im currently just functioning at bare minimum,😢
Great Job Carolina ❤ many reasons why that’s where you need to be right now. You’re alive and get to enjoy that gift for what it is aside from what you may desire to produce on top of that. I’m rooting for you 🎉
Sometimes it’s all I can do to keep up with laundry and dishes 🫣 my husband works full time and is always on call after hours. I work a full time higher level corporate job and am studying for my CPA exams. I get asked all the time when we are going to have kids since we’re going on six years of marriage but I honestly can’t imagine bringing a child into my life in this season that I am in. Whenever someone has a baby or announces they are pregnant on social media, I decide to snooze them from my feed for a while. As bad as that sounds it helps me focus on my current season. Kids will come but I don’t need other peoples lives shoved down my throat causing me to feel guilty for not already having kids.
We were married ten years prior to having our daughter. She's now 21 and our son is 17. You're ready when you're ready.
Angela❤❤❤. Your videos Bring me so much comfort thank you
What a great reminder, so thankful for your corner of the interwebs!
Gold 🎉 I can’t tell you how timely this video is. Thank you!!
This was perfect timing! It’s totally like God had me watch your video for myself and to share w a friend. Just this week we were discussing the pit of comparison that the enemy would love to put us in. It all boiles down to sticking with where God has you IN THIS SEASON and not looking around at others! Love it, friend!❤️
What a great and inspiring video 👍🏻♥️. Everyone entering their adult life needs to listen and remember grace is so important to your mental health. 🤔 Thanks for sharing 🤗 God bless
Perfect timing! Thank you!🥰
We love you Angi ❤ Thank You for sharing all that encuragement & motivation & wisdom 💐💕☀️
Love your curly hair
Yes! I am just trying tonaccept that there are seasons of life!
I appreciate all that you are saying. My question is 'How do you deal with others' (specifically husband's) expectations that may be more than you can actually do?' Honestly, I'm not trying to complain. I know there isn't a lot that I can do to change his mind. I'm more wondering how to recognize and respect my limitations and the type of 'day' I am having, while also fielding "Why didn't _____ get done?" questions.
That would probably just have to be a conversation with our husband that needs to be had. I know sometimes it’s hard depending on the type of man your husband is. But pray about it first so that your words are chosen by God and with a gentle spirit.
Yes, this can be very difficult and discouraging. I have tried to ask my husband what are your top priorities in the day. Good dinner, good homeschool, good s#x? And I've had to just say, I'm really depleted right now from xyz, I'm doing my best.
Also, ( I'm assuming you stay at home, I could be wrong,) remember that even in his full day of work, your husband gets a lunch and a break. You have the right to sit down and do nothing or something you you enjoy during the day too. You don't have to feel shame for that ❤
Something else that isn't necessarily fun to do, but is pretty revealing is an exercise I have done when trying to find productivity gaps in my work: if you are able, throughout one day (or two, for consistency), document each activity of the day and how much time is spent doing it. Have a notepad out and just keep track as often as you can. You don't have to be minutely detailed, but thorough enough to have a proper grasp of things. Of course it will likely be challenging to do if you're already juggling household chores and spending time with kids, but if you can commit to it for just a day or two, you can see for yourself whether you are truly productive, or whether perhaps a bit more structure may be helpful.
In my own experience, it has been both a private revelation about my own need for greater discipline, as well as a validating proof of just how much I have been tasked with in a day.
It is in these moments of realization that we can either make a change and improve our methods, OR, we can bring the evidence to our partner and say, "Look, here is all that goes on each day. I need to be able to prioritize; what do you think can be set aside in order to accomplish our most important goals?" This way, even if deciding what to drop is difficult, you will both be so much more on the same page and will be better equipped to tackle the problem more effectively!
Wishing you the best and hope this is helpful ❤️🙏🏻
Maybe have the conversation of what top 3 things means the most for you to get done to him...guys have different priorities for a home as well and we can make them feel seen by loving them in this way. And by having that conversation you can also discuss what things you feel need to be done to you and see if you have some things in common and what you see differently, maybe there are things he doesnt mind if you do less and is ok with you passing by for something else.
For example, my husband likes that dinner is made by a certain time so the kids get to bed and he can digest food before he needs to sleep but doesnt mind the dishes sitting for longer so we can spend time after dinner as a family. It allows us the hang out time but takes the stress of cleaning up after dinner and feeling disconnected, so then I do dishes in the morning when I have tons of energy after he heads off to work :)
I love feral housewife 😂 it fits my wife as well
So helpful! Thanks, Angie! 🤗
Had to buy the course, thanks!
Great message❤
Oh my gosh this is SO GOOD and I’m sending it to all my mama homies!!! Thank you! I can’t wait to sit down when everyone is asleep and make these three lists 💖
such a helpful video 🤍
Wow I really needed to hear this today. I am pregnant with two kids under 4 and a husband who is on call/shift worker for 12-16 hour days. I am struggling.
It’s also interesting when you said some people feel like a slob, some think they need to make bread… or having a decluttered house, I look like trash most days but I do home cook meals and make bread, so we all do what we think is best for us. Makes so much sense and reminds me not to judge the ones who always look put together.
You are a gem, thank you!
I always catch up on TH-cam videos while making lunches and cooking dinner. Also, I wasn’t convinced I had ADHD (2 eldest kids diagnosed and husband has it) but when I tried the medication oh my gosh I had the same experience my brain was so calm and quiet and I could think clearly and stay on one task as a time :)
Very good video! 💕
And today... We're eating 😂😂😂
Yes. Some days, that's as good as it gets!
Awesome informative video.
Thank you for your lesson❤. May I suggest something else. I know you know Cas of Clutterbug, and so I guess you must have seen the family drawings of her daughter. I think she could make a wonderful drawing of your family and all the animals. Just an idea😊
Well explained. I like the three types of day plans. I’ll have to try that. As for the sticky notes on the wall… I’m not sure there is enough wall. 😂
Gosh I need this today!
Can you make a video on how to cope with kids getting older or how your dealing with the two girls getting older without breaking down over it
I love this idea.
Interesting! I was older when I started having kids, wrapping up at 41 w newborn twins.I was a very involved mom. I used to think they could stay w me forever etc but there comes a natural point where you feel your kids are like birds that have become too big for the nest and they are running the parent birds ragged trying to feed giant fledglings. If yours are like mine they will kind of wear out their welcome if you just have to serve them without a break or if they don't contribute in any way in the household. i know it is our fault tbat we did everything while our kids sat around or slept late but that happening over the years kind of changes it. It is kind of a relief when you are in your 60s and your youngest kids are mid-20s and now you can do for them as you desire.
PREACH!!!!
Hans Solo, as a statue for Jabbadahut... had me bust up laughing. The imagery was ::chefs kiss:: 😂
Watching this video as a disabled person and being in pain all the time is hilarious LOL I'm almost always feeling crappy thank you for making this video as a distraction for me
I understand what you're saying but then my husband will ALWAYS say to me " well I have ...", making it turn around that he's got more.
He probably just wants it validated that what he's doing is hard too. A lot of times trying to tell them how hard we have it makes them feel like we're saying they have it easy, so he's just trying to show you he doesn't.
@@kristinotto102yes I agree with this. I have found that when I spontaneously tell my husband “Wow! You are doing a lot babe. I know it would be hard to manage xyz that you’re doing. Thank you for working so hard for our family”, he reciprocates with encouraging me and noticing how much I’m doing too. The first time he was really surprised, lol. Then it got easier for him and now he initiates the compliments for me more than I do!
How do you do this hairstyle ? Love it 😊
thumbnail’s cute. 🥰👍🏻
Umm I just finished breastfeeding last month only to find out I’m pregnant with surprise no. 5 (ages 7-1) so that resonated with this tired mom 😭😭😭
Ask me what my job is …I always say I am a domestic engineer..do I get looks what is that. I have mostly been a stay at home mom for 45 years, now it is the grandsons.
I couldn’t click fast enough!
😂😂😂 a feral housewife 🎉❤ 😅yep that’s me
I love the way you teach and what you teach but I am a retired nurse living with my retired husband. Much of what you are teaching does not apply to me or people in my place. My greatest frustration comes from feeling so useless because I can't do all the things I did when I was younger when I homeschooled our kids and had foster kids. After living such a busy, productive life it is hard not to feel past my prime. :-)
We were superb swamped with multiple kids, self-employment, etc. to the point that I actually feel like I kind of have PTSD. Our wires were so tight that even now in retirement it is like we feel guilty if the other sees us take a break or something. It is ridiculous. I keep a daily planner even now.
I am stuck in a 'season' that doesn't serve me well.
I don't know how to divide myself up to give enough to everyone.
Those unmet needs are running out of time, I will be 69 in two days.
I will be 69 this fall. Can't believe how tired I get in a day. Some days I do so well and the next I can barely keep up my daily routine. Been retired for 4 years and slowed down so much from a very physical job.
@steveschumacher5470 I retired from IT several years ago, but raising 2 granddaughters for 11 years now, they are 14 and soon 17. The hubs is 75, also retired IT for 15 years.
The 10 acres is just TOO much.
Wow. This is great advice. Never thought about it that way.
Was a little ....turned off... when I got to the end. Made it feel like an infomercial
I passed by the thumbnail all day because I thought you were Taylor Swift!
😂❤🎉