Krieg Guardsman Epsilon-445: Hey, 228? Krieg Guardsman Epsilon-228: Yeah, 445? E-445: I was wondering, Seen anything... strange? E-228: What do you mean? E-445: Well, my commander got killed by a poodle who bit off his head and ran off with it. Reports are that the head fused with the poodle's jaws, could still talk and it was seen trying to hand out pamphlets to the 11th. E-228: Yeah. Stuff like that happens sometimes. E-445: Well, Doesn't that strike you as a little... odd? E-228: I try not to think about it. E-445: Oh. ... What do you think about? A Single Shot Echos into the distance. E-445 falls apart into a mass of squirming eels. Climbing out of the foxhole, E-228 tosses a phosphorus grenade over his shoulder back into the hole and advances on the nearest sound of gunfire. E-228: I think anyone who knows whatever a poodle is, is more then likely not actually in the death corp.
For some reason I got the mental image in my head of the chemical weapons that the Death Korps employs against Nurgle's monsters being bleach, disinfectant, and oxy-clean. The guardsmen trade out their lasguns for power washers, fixing scrub brushes in place of bayonets, and Nurgle's followers screaming and dissolving when exposed to soap.
I have to ask, ignoring the result, what self respecting Inquisitor would allow a public broadcast of Nergle Nature? These Hereticas are really dropping the ball here.
Death Corps Guardsman picking his way through a toxic swamp: "This planet almost feels like home, but it's missing something..." *Chaos forces fill the air with poison gas* Death Corps Guardsman: "Ahh, just like Mother used to make. Now it's perfect here."
- "Sir! my men are getting restless and nervous. We've already had several go down to nervous breakdowns" - "How so?" - "Exactly 2 minutes and thirteen seconds ago we received orders to stop bombarding the enemy positions in preparations for the offensive. My men are getting itchy trigger fingers and feel they are a disappointment in the eyes of the emperor" - "I know exactly how they feel. I've been frantically holding on to my saber hoping for the order to charge over the top" Both men then stare longingly towards the enemy positions.
Since this series started, I have completed an entire 300-level military history class, and this series is arguably more detailed and better researched than alot of the sources we used about *actual* battles.
Polly Sage I can imagine something like :”And after smoking an absolute crap ton of narcotic, the mad man finally lost his wit and marched through the alps”
well to be fair arch had a lot of research materials for this. if you take the gallic wars for example, the only source we have is caesar himself. but i am sure he wrote it objectively.
Tbf though this is a book where a battle is a battle in a fantasy you get the option to tell about Timmy tommy billy bobby bald guy no one liked shorter dude skinnier dude fat dude ugly dude that dude you saw poop once that one guy from barns and nobles that other guy who dated your sister your sister who isn’t even your sister cause it’s actually a dude ...... where a battle is take bobby story mash it with billy story but mainly focus on my story and then add some heroics maybe and then blam
"Death Riders! Our new commander Theoden will give you a fiery speech before you do a massive cavalry charge into the enemies lines!" "Kriegsmen...I'll keep this short, Death! DEATHHH!! DEAAATHHHHH!!!"
Nobody, Not a single soul: ... Krieger Command Structure (Now reinforced by the Inquisition): LeTs ViRuS bOmB tHe NuRgLe WoRsHiPpErS Nurgle worshippers: huehuehuehuehuehuehuehue
@@MadaraUchihamizukage *Cadian IG:* "Wow, since you guys love your shovels so much, _why aren't you just making ranged weapons that shoot shovels!?"_ *Kried Engineer:* "BY MEIN KAISER'S LIGHT! JA, DAS IS GENIUS! WUNDERBAR!" **Immediately begins to design the device on paper accompanied by excited gasmask noises** *Cadian IG:* _"Oh for fuck's sake..._ **sigh** Just don't let the Admech see you're designing something."
Papa nurgle’s like the coolaid man; bursting forth through a tear in the warp and giving everyone mystery juice. The Kreigsmen must love him! Also, a survival horror game with you being a kreigsman moving across nurgle infested no mans land would be amazing! Just imagine, your gas mask limiting your vision, green gas roiling as strange shapes stir in the fog, assaulted by the dead and demons... that would be awesome!
I mean, looking at it that way. A whole *lot* of the lord inquisitor's decisions start to make sense. Nobody will complain about the nearly comical waste of manpower because the kriegsman want to die horribly in battle, nobody will complain about the loss of an entire sectors worth of surplus munitions because it was as good as slag the moment Cardinal Xaphan went renegade, and nobody will complain about how long it took because relatively speaking it was the most expedient and successful offensive on Vracks, and anyone who's input might mean a single smidge that also might complain about the lord Inquisitor had died on Vracks.
I thought an Inquisitor, of Lord Hector Rex's calibre, would have learned from previous Leaders on Vraks, not to make the same mistakes they, more or less, did as well. And the Inquisitors holding back in the lines?! Utter cowards for them not pushing forward and fight for "their" beloved Emperor. Points for them not being reckless yes; but still, I expected from them!
Hector: "Well this guard dude in charge may be okay but as a Inquisitor Lord Protector I don't need to learn from his mistakes... or the one of his predecessor..." ALL of Planat Vrax: sigh
Seeing as Arch mentioned in the last video that he considered the Vraksians *surrendering* to be a possibility when they are attacked yeah, he learned nothing
It really starts to feel like there are at best a hand full of inquisitors that get enough love from the fluff writers to make them out to be capable and no like bumbling idiots with way to much power and authority.
If you ever work in the military, or take a job doing govt work for the govt, you'll quickly understand that the entire whole is pretty much held together by a handful of competent people, while the rest are bodies to fill space at best, or heinously incompetent.
The Death Core are the only ones that could have possibly pulled this plan off! My heart goes out to the Krieg officers that put up with the incompetent higher ups and snobby inquisitors.
Litterally as I'm thinking "hmm, it's Friday, where's my siege of vrax...." i look down and the next notification is the siege. Damn good man, Arch. Damn good
You know, having watched all these videos, I think I'm ready to lay siege to something. I mean, if GoT can put the Trebuchets in front of the infantry, I'm sure I can do better then that.
I was pissing off my wife when we watched it together. I was actually shouting, "WHAT THE FUCK???" so many times she told me to either find a way to shut up or go away and watch it later.
I was a M1A2 Tank crewman (19K) way back when, and I would think that putting a round in the chamber would be better. You're basically plugging up the gun-tube. Only thing I would see as bad is the Gas would probably eat away at the shell and cause it to go wildly off course. But it wouldn't detonate the round in the tube, and if it did... it literally designed to explode in that position. So why not plug the gun tube with a round? 21:30 I guess the warhead could go off, but.... i dont know any explosive that detonates by acid. Hell out rounds only detonate by electricity!
I almost dropped the phone to the Toilet when I got the Notification I got so excited! Another (almost) hour-long Lore Video on Vraks a.k.a. "WW1 Western Front" The Planet with a truly Heretical Chaotic Flavor. *Happy Gas Mask and Fixing Bayonet Noises Intensify*
OzixiThrill Well, given the fact that a good ork is not only brutal, but actually cunning (sometimes), not as the orders from that dumm Zuelkhe, the first imperial commander, this ork WAAAGH would have used somewhat clever tactics besides the head on ofensives. Death korps orders didnt include cunning tactics, so definitevly orks would have done far better than DK in the early stages of the siege.
I must say until today all I knew of your work were your critiques of various strategy games. This video started playing automatically as I left the TH-cam app running on my phone while doing something else and damn... you are talented, sir! First I thought "this guy sure narrates well, I wonder who wrote the story", and was floored when I realized it was you. Very impressive!
I'm going to be so sad when this series is over, these videos have been my bedtime stories for the past few months. There's Nothing like tales of death and destruction to help me drift off into dreamland.
Krieg Guardsmen 2025123: Hey 5555551. You would think after 10 years of war, they would've learned bombing us with gas doesn't work! Krieg Guardsmen 5555551: They're crazed heretics. They're unable to learn how to aim properly. Krieg Guardsmen 2025123: *Looks down and watches boots slowly cook* Hey 5555551...I think they learned?!
The moment you realise this is video 29 of this series and its been just under or over 6 months of listening to Arch's majestic voice tell us of the grim darkness that is Vraks. totally worth it....
Arch you are the Dan Carlin of warhammer. Thank you for the spectacular efforts you make to entertain us. This series has been incredible. What if Verdun and the Somme were MUCH worse and demons?
For maybe the first time in this series, I actually feel kind of...sorry...for the Death Korps troopers. I mean, yeah, they’ve been locked in a grinding, torturous siege for over a decade, but they’re *Kriegers.* War of attrition is their bread and butter, they get off on shovel-to-bayonet melee combat and artillery bombardments. But seeing the corpses of their fallen comrades desecrated by the Archenemy? Seeing their brothers’ noble sacrifice be so horribly defiled? I know that “Death Korps of Krieg” and “Stiff Upper Lip” are practically synonymous, but I have trouble believing they wouldn’t be seething with rage at such an insult. And then to be ordered to fall back, denying them the chance to exact vengeance on the heretical scum for their crimes? Oof... *muffled screams of impotent rage intensify*
Legio Ignis Wolfhound packs armed with twin inferno cannons would be remarkably useful in this scenario. The rot of the plague god is nothing before the holy flames of the Omnissiah made manifest!!!
Vraks isn't obstinate it's just full of top decking. Vraks drew Exodia, activated a Miracle spell card, and pulled the psa 10 1st edition base charizard. These people should have just been a footnote under the power armor boot of a space marine. An entire army advance is stopped by chaos marines, loyalists take one position and they're done.
Signal: Tooot-toot-too-toooot. Kriegsman#1: Whats that? Kriegsman#2: I never heard this signal Kriegsman #3: Me neither. Let's go on. It was the signal for retreat they where hearing all along...
1 Death Rider Company: 65 Men 7×65=455 Out of 455 men mounted on something liken to a Clydesdale Grizzly bear armed with a Lance that essentially has an AT mine on the end of it... _Only 60 came back alive._
YES, i've been waiting for this so long i need to know what happens next. Also still wondering what happened to the Sisters of Battle from the beginning of this story.
@Drakon590 just found the combination funny, if I wanted a character to die horribly 40k style from marvel I would put captain marvel on the chopping board
I almost cried when you said that out of the 7 companies of Death Riders only 16 men, heavily wounded, were alive at that night.. damn this series has gotten to me..
Thank the God Emperor. The Commisar would have me executed if i didn't update him on the situation on Vraks through my venerable vox-caster. I pray to the Emperor that further broadcasts will follow shortly without interferance.
It'll probably be both... | 2:50 - (gas mask muffled cheers) | 19:40 - Not the Ork definition then? (e.g. it's friendly, if it misses) | 24:22 - The Sons of Mortarion make a return. | 41:25 - They're too valuable to waste. | 50:50 - Orks just care that they kill something, it doesn't mean it has to be the enemy.
TY Arch for this & the vvhole Seige of Vraks series , it vvas so good I attempted to like every comment , may have been 15-30 shy of all of them. TY again & keep up the great vvork !
Aaand again Vraks proved that we can take a figure of speech and turn it into surreality: After all, the number of defenders was not the only thing that was melting away ^^
Scott MUrphy i think that by this point of the siege most of the competent soldiers on the traitor side were dead, Maning the fortress, or batshit insane
Krig guardsman Just one thing is missing to make this second home. We got the toxic gas and shell craters just needs a little radiation yep that would make it all perfect. Satisfied gas mask noise fixes bayonet
Krieg Guardsman Epsilon-445: Hey, 228?
Krieg Guardsman Epsilon-228: Yeah, 445?
E-445: I was wondering, Seen anything... strange?
E-228: What do you mean?
E-445: Well, my commander got killed by a poodle who bit off his head and ran off with it. Reports are that the head fused with the poodle's jaws, could still talk and it was seen trying to hand out pamphlets to the 11th.
E-228: Yeah. Stuff like that happens sometimes.
E-445: Well, Doesn't that strike you as a little... odd?
E-228: I try not to think about it.
E-445: Oh. ... What do you think about?
A Single Shot Echos into the distance. E-445 falls apart into a mass of squirming eels. Climbing out of the foxhole, E-228 tosses a phosphorus grenade over his shoulder back into the hole and advances on the nearest sound of gunfire.
E-228: I think anyone who knows whatever a poodle is, is more then likely not actually in the death corp.
The Eldritch God this is amazingly funny
Chad E-228
Oh well done sir, well done indeed
Yeah. I keep adding to the story as the videos come out. You know, I should go back and collect them all. Put them on Arch's Server.
@@TheEldritchGod I second that.
Inquisitorial command: "The area is relatively undefended."
Nurgle the Plague Daddy: *"What are ya doin' in ma swamp?"*
Is... Is Nurgle being played by Shrek?
@@0MaxK0
Sure, why the Hell not?
somebody once told me the empire is gonna roll me, i aint the sharpest shovel in the shed C:
I would rather Nurgle be played by Shrek rather than Old Gregg......cause the alternative gives Slanesh too much power....
Halo4Lyf , you asked.
For some reason I got the mental image in my head of the chemical weapons that the Death Korps employs against Nurgle's monsters being bleach, disinfectant, and oxy-clean. The guardsmen trade out their lasguns for power washers, fixing scrub brushes in place of bayonets, and Nurgle's followers screaming and dissolving when exposed to soap.
LMAO
Iirc followers of nurgle are kept alive partially by the infections and plague of nurgle so perhaps soap could be an effective weapon
Welcome to Cleanhammer 40 Suds
It turns out the face under the gasmasks are Mr Clean. And their shovels are Arm-n-Hammers.
Welcome to vraks nature documentary. Today we are going to lo- *narrator drowns into acid green puddle on field.*
Please wipe your feet
scavenge doctrine is crap, luchs is so much better than the ostwind! XD
I have to ask, ignoring the result, what self respecting Inquisitor would allow a public broadcast of Nergle Nature? These Hereticas are really dropping the ball here.
Drowns? Don't you mean melts?
melting in stinky acid pits is temporary, reemerging as a happy servant of pappa Nurgle is eternal
Death Corps Guardsman picking his way through a toxic swamp: "This planet almost feels like home, but it's missing something..."
*Chaos forces fill the air with poison gas*
Death Corps Guardsman: "Ahh, just like Mother used to make. Now it's perfect here."
Krieg: Now we just need-
Another kriegsmen gets his head blown apart
Krieg: Ahhh just like home
Curiously, Nurgle doesn't seem terribly fond of radiation for the complete Krieg experience.
@@pumatt Nurgle likes disease more than poison.
needs more... radiation.
- "Sir! my men are getting restless and nervous. We've already had several go down to nervous breakdowns"
- "How so?"
- "Exactly 2 minutes and thirteen seconds ago we received orders to stop bombarding the enemy positions in preparations for the offensive. My men are getting itchy trigger fingers and feel they are a disappointment in the eyes of the emperor"
- "I know exactly how they feel. I've been frantically holding on to my saber hoping for the order to charge over the top"
Both men then stare longingly towards the enemy positions.
Plague marine surrounded by TP3 gas and fired on by tanks " *this is fine grandfather* "
no bruva, this is heaven
perfect
Perfection in it's purest form...
Krieg guardsman surrounded by TP3 gas and tanks being melted by the gas *"FINALLY!"*
@@Rick586 you sound like a heretic
Since this series started, I have completed an entire 300-level military history class, and this series is arguably more detailed and better researched than alot of the sources we used about *actual* battles.
@@JohnDoe-xv9du What about Arch doing El Alamein?
Polly Sage I can imagine something like :”And after smoking an absolute crap ton of narcotic, the mad man finally lost his wit and marched through the alps”
Haha yeah mate, i found the same thing hey. Lets make that prof. arch, courses run the whole year and if you miss one tut youre screwed 😂
well to be fair arch had a lot of research materials for this. if you take the gallic wars for example, the only source we have is caesar himself. but i am sure he wrote it objectively.
Tbf though this is a book where a battle is a battle in a fantasy you get the option to tell about Timmy tommy billy bobby bald guy no one liked shorter dude skinnier dude fat dude ugly dude that dude you saw poop once that one guy from barns and nobles that other guy who dated your sister your sister who isn’t even your sister cause it’s actually a dude ...... where a battle is take bobby story mash it with billy story but mainly focus on my story and then add some heroics maybe and then blam
"Death Riders! Our new commander Theoden will give you a fiery speech before you do a massive cavalry charge into the enemies lines!" "Kriegsmen...I'll keep this short, Death! DEATHHH!! DEAAATHHHHH!!!"
Death Rider: Best commander in a long time!
@@overlordmgcover2262 another Death Rider: "Well, he is kinda talkative. But I like his choice of words."
Ph my God someone should make a meme out of the ride of the Rohirim to this extent
*Hector Rex:* "My assault plan will end this war quickly."
*Vraks:* *_"WELL ACTUALLY..."_*
Me: Well yes. But actually no.
*BLAMMED*
*HERESY!*
krieg guardsmen: change plans, CHARGE
@@mochimoni1975 CHANGE OF PLANS, STEEL RAIN.
@@bloodraven1190 too late! were gonna die anyways, KEEP CHARGING
Over by Christmas 😂
Nobody, Not a single soul: ...
Krieger Command Structure (Now reinforced by the Inquisition): LeTs ViRuS bOmB tHe NuRgLe WoRsHiPpErS
Nurgle worshippers: huehuehuehuehuehuehuehue
Josh Puckett Bruva the loyalists are surrendering! Look at all these gifts they have given us in the name of the plague father
@Reverend Krieger Durden Tyler sr the only diseases that Nurgles children fears is whatever STD is currently making the rounds with Slaneeshi cultists
You'd think the inquisition of all people would know that this wouldn't work...
Jokes on you I'm into that shit
@@morsletum5348 As if the Inquisition ever thinks before they act.
-High command: cancels all offensive actions
-Kreg guardsmen: reeeeeeeee in gas mask
-KREG guardsmen 2: dont worry brother, let us shoot him
Imagine being the one nurgle dude dying from virus bombs, his friends in hell would mock him forever.
"rips through the fabric of reality"
I CAME AS FAST AS I COULD
Now now were not Slaaneshy cultist here.
Hello Ed-boys, many doors, yes?
Plague space marines are tough and all, but I've got this trench shovel.
But not a mace?
glorified flashlight < trench shovel
poisounos gas < trench shovel
chaos cultists < trench shovel
tanks < trench shovel
plague marines < trench shovel
@@MadaraUchihamizukage
trench shovel < 2 trench shovels
@@MadaraUchihamizukage
*Cadian IG:* "Wow, since you guys love your shovels so much, _why aren't you just making ranged weapons that shoot shovels!?"_
*Kried Engineer:* "BY MEIN KAISER'S LIGHT! JA, DAS IS GENIUS! WUNDERBAR!" **Immediately begins to design the device on paper accompanied by excited gasmask noises**
*Cadian IG:* _"Oh for fuck's sake..._ **sigh** Just don't let the Admech see you're designing something."
BP Lup I think you mean entrenching tool, degenerate
26:40
Murphy's Law of Combat, #33: Tracers work both ways
The first law of warfare aswell
I thought that was penned by gun jesus
Law #12: When in doubt, fix bayonets.
@PipPupPop
Law # 1-1-2-3-5-8-13-21-34-55: If you have to stop charging once bayonets are fixed, you're doing it wrong.
@@mattaffenit9898 Rush B no stop
New commander but Vraks...Vraks never changes.
Well it does... turning into a warp infested hole
Papa nurgle’s like the coolaid man; bursting forth through a tear in the warp and giving everyone mystery juice. The Kreigsmen must love him!
Also, a survival horror game with you being a kreigsman moving across nurgle infested no mans land would be amazing!
Just imagine, your gas mask limiting your vision, green gas roiling as strange shapes stir in the fog, assaulted by the dead and demons... that would be awesome!
Most of the campaign would make for an amazing survival horror game, honestly.
You could make an entire series of games based on this one war.
@@tcan2881 Unfortunately, GW isn’t forward thinking enough to listen to fans about anything of this kind of nature.
Have some TP3 meter, not only you got demons and else around, you got to keep watch of the gas presence/concentration and your equipement durability
No one:
Me: Explaining how the assasination of Arch Duke Ferdinand led to the infestation of Vraks
I mean it led to WW1 and mass trench warfare, so in that way if it didn't happen no one would've had the idea for Vraks
Lord inquisitor: sends infantry into toxic chemical gas fields
Infantry: dies
Lord inquisitor: *surprised pikachu face*
next step: send more infantry
If send more infantry doesn't work.
*Send more Infantry*
"Whatever it is I'm willing to send wave after wave of my own men"
Honestly, imperial commanders carefully studied Zapp Brannigan's "The art of war" did they?
Kif, get my uniform, my hellgun, and wave after wave of expendable redshirts
Krieg guardsmen: *Turns to soldier next to him* Hey, do you ever wonder why we're here?
*Las pistol fires*
Krieg commissar: you shouldn't be
*skipping guardsmen* "And nothing could go wrong"... *Crashing sound* "oh no it all went wrong " Melts in acid jpg
We are up to 21 hours, 3 minutes, and 22 seconds of Vraks ladies and gentlemen
Justin Vissia To be fair I thought at first I was only 10 hours in at most
I FEEL THE ARCH OVERTAKE ME!!! IT IS A GOOD PAIN!
Jeezus. I watched every episode till now. Time we'll spent. FIX BAYONETS!
I've started speaking slight Scottish.
Shit is he Scottish or Irish I have no clue?
@@kostakatsoulis2922 Norweigian
*inhales TP3* Lemme tell you kids about Vraks-*melts*
TP3 is basically Nurgle hot sauce.
Tp6 is his favorite brand
I'm pretty sure the Lord Inquisitor is just getting rid of uppity Inquisitors at this point...
and also Obligatory
*Happy Gas Mask Noises*
I mean, looking at it that way. A whole *lot* of the lord inquisitor's decisions start to make sense. Nobody will complain about the nearly comical waste of manpower because the kriegsman want to die horribly in battle, nobody will complain about the loss of an entire sectors worth of surplus munitions because it was as good as slag the moment Cardinal Xaphan went renegade, and nobody will complain about how long it took because relatively speaking it was the most expedient and successful offensive on Vracks, and anyone who's input might mean a single smidge that also might complain about the lord Inquisitor had died on Vracks.
Siege of Vraks: "What the hell could go wrong?!"
emphasis on HELL
Winks in death guard
Oh just about everything under the sun.
@@Fulgrim2 not true ........ the 1st landing went fine
Colm Corbec ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING
“Its not to reason why, but to do or die!”
But in realism with the holy inquisition its “ do and die”
Krieg Guardsmen: *Happy Gas Mask Noises*
Nurglites: Ha! You guys can’t do shit to us! WE’RE INVINCIBLEEEEE!!!
Imperial Navy: You sure about that mate?
I thought an Inquisitor, of Lord Hector Rex's calibre, would have learned from previous Leaders on Vraks, not to make the same mistakes they, more or less, did as well.
And the Inquisitors holding back in the lines?! Utter cowards for them not pushing forward and fight for "their" beloved Emperor. Points for them not being reckless yes; but still, I expected from them!
Hector: "Well this guard dude in charge may be okay but as a Inquisitor Lord Protector I don't need to learn from his mistakes... or the one of his predecessor..."
ALL of Planat Vrax: sigh
Seeing as Arch mentioned in the last video that he considered the Vraksians *surrendering* to be a possibility when they are attacked yeah, he learned nothing
@@elysiankentarchy1531 thanks for the reminder there. Heck, there's so much information to go through huh.
2 arch videos in 1 day? our glorious golden chair daddy has blessed us!...i mean praise the emperor
Wheres the second
@@nickfine1989nf VtM2 Tremere lore
DK: “ Green Hell”? We call that a walk through the trenches back home. *smug laugh in gas mask*
Dk?
@@ju1cycrackfa1ry death korps
Noel Collado donkey kong
Jack Snow umm excuse me nigga, it stands for donkey kong
@@soupenjoyer6173 in this instance its reffering to the death korps
you know its bad when even the kreig hesitates to send their men in
It really starts to feel like there are at best a hand full of inquisitors that get enough love from the fluff writers to make them out to be capable and no like bumbling idiots with way to much power and authority.
If you ever work in the military, or take a job doing govt work for the govt, you'll quickly understand that the entire whole is pretty much held together by a handful of competent people, while the rest are bodies to fill space at best, or heinously incompetent.
You know you're in the 41st Millennium when Caustic Gas Wapons can eat holes in TANKS!
The Death Core are the only ones that could have possibly pulled this plan off! My heart goes out to the Krieg officers that put up with the incompetent higher ups and snobby inquisitors.
Cole Jacobs eh, so could the Mordians, vostroyans or valkarians
@Krieger_1889 Mordians are heavily disciplined gaurdsmen who never retreat until ordered to
Litterally as I'm thinking "hmm, it's Friday, where's my siege of vrax...." i look down and the next notification is the siege. Damn good man, Arch. Damn good
Krieg guardsmen: first gas, then traitor Marines, then Eldrich Abominations, now frakking ZOMBIES!?
Also Krieg guardsmen: AWESOME!
@@forkekus6917 exactly
@@forkekus6917 also also
*gas mask praising noises*
Yet another Krieg Guardsman: I know, Right?! Best deployment ever! I bet I kill more before dying in battle than you do!
At this point I think even the death guard was having an "again with this shit" moment
You know, having watched all these videos, I think I'm ready to lay siege to something. I mean, if GoT can put the Trebuchets in front of the infantry, I'm sure I can do better then that.
To be fair, a toddler could create a better defense of Winterfell than what they put in the show
Praise the Emperor that I decided not to watch that after I read the books (3 at the time of it starting at least). They put them IN FRONT? ......
I was pissing off my wife when we watched it together. I was actually shouting, "WHAT THE FUCK???" so many times she told me to either find a way to shut up or go away and watch it later.
@@randallb84 Yeah, I'm not even watching this season, and the whole thing just seems to be one shitshow after another.
When I first played Rome Total war, even I knew better than use the tatics of GoT
Well I might have done the whole yolo calvary charge a few times😆
I was a M1A2 Tank crewman (19K) way back when, and I would think that putting a round in the chamber would be better. You're basically plugging up the gun-tube. Only thing I would see as bad is the Gas would probably eat away at the shell and cause it to go wildly off course. But it wouldn't detonate the round in the tube, and if it did... it literally designed to explode in that position.
So why not plug the gun tube with a round? 21:30 I guess the warhead could go off, but.... i dont know any explosive that detonates by acid. Hell out rounds only detonate by electricity!
Finally someone who can say the word Corps (Korps) properly. Emperor bless you Arch
Arch, you're like the British (or Norwegian) Dan Carlin of 40k Lore. Absolutely love your videos man.
The enemies rising as zombies only means that we can kill them all over again, afix bayonets and charge!
"Authorise chemical weapons on Nurgle forces"
Me: Facepalm
Death guard: *Happy plague noises*
*"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP?!"*
Plague marines are like onions?
@@koenvandamme6901 they have many, many layers of rotten flesh
Arch post a video on vrak
*giggling gas mask noises*
*emperor bothering intensifies*
*distant sound of bayonets being assembled*
I’m ready
I almost dropped the phone to the Toilet when I got the Notification I got so excited!
Another (almost) hour-long Lore Video on Vraks a.k.a. "WW1 Western Front" The Planet with a truly Heretical Chaotic Flavor. *Happy Gas Mask and Fixing Bayonet Noises Intensify*
_Krieg gasmask grunting and skreeing_
_Muffled gasmask panting_
_Bayonet fixing noises_
_Muffled warcry and distinctly non-muffled pew pew of flashlight_
I think this is the wrong Green Hill Zone
"Lol this plan will work, bros!"
(Somewhere some Adminiatratum bean counter screams into his Data-Slate)
"GENTLEMEN! THERE IS A CHANCE THAT THIS MIGHT WORK!"
"A-actually, you said there was 'no chance' this would work."
"... FOOLS! THIS WILL NEVER WORK!"
The Greenskins would have a BALL fighting those damn Vraxians!
oh jeeze. Vrax vs Greenskins.
Dommy Dench I wanna see that. Armaggedon’s 2nd and 3rd wars done right.
Actually reminds me of that imperial guard ork meme
Honestly, the greenskins would have overran the place in 8 years, not giving the heretics chance to actually become heretics.
OzixiThrill Well, given the fact that a good ork is not only brutal, but actually cunning (sometimes), not as the orders from that dumm Zuelkhe, the first imperial commander, this ork WAAAGH would have used somewhat clever tactics besides the head on ofensives. Death korps orders didnt include cunning tactics, so definitevly orks would have done far better than DK in the early stages of the siege.
From the smallest spore to the trees so tall, Papa Nurgle LOVES you ALL!
Did they not have napalm rounds for the artillery pieces to fire. You know, the whole cleansing fire thing.
I agree, it would certainly come in handy 😅
Blame the Mechanicus, it's probably "rare" ammunition.
What a day to be alive! First my Krieg leman russ tanks annihilated my friend Tyranid hordes.
And now new Vraks episode!
Praise be to the Emperor!
Death to the xeno filth!
I heard "Just as planned!" just enough times I'm sure Tzeench had something to do with this episode...
I must say until today all I knew of your work were your critiques of various strategy games. This video started playing automatically as I left the TH-cam app running on my phone while doing something else and damn... you are talented, sir!
First I thought "this guy sure narrates well, I wonder who wrote the story", and was floored when I realized it was you.
Very impressive!
Demicore ....um he didn’t
I'm going to be so sad when this series is over, these videos have been my bedtime stories for the past few months. There's Nothing like tales of death and destruction to help me drift off into dreamland.
Krieg Guardsmen 2025123: Hey 5555551. You would think after 10 years of war, they would've learned bombing us with gas doesn't work!
Krieg Guardsmen 5555551: They're crazed heretics. They're unable to learn how to aim properly.
Krieg Guardsmen 2025123: *Looks down and watches boots slowly cook* Hey 5555551...I think they learned?!
Krieg Guardsman 5555551: Say what?! *Looks down at own cooking boots* Ah! The mud is toxic! They HAVE learned!
"The new commander has a foolproof plan. What could go wrong?"
Everything. Everything will go wrong on Vraks.
Not everything. The slug. The slug did *exactly* what it was planning.
Who replaced Arch with a machine dedicated solely to making lore videos for us?
That moment when you get to work forty minutes early due to misreading the schedule and this pops up. *happygasmask*
The moment you realise this is video 29 of this series and its been just under or over 6 months of listening to Arch's majestic voice tell us of the grim darkness that is Vraks. totally worth it....
*High Command orders a Full Scale Offensives*
88th Siege Army: Awwww shit here we go again.
Two videos in ONE DAY ?
WHAT KIND OF HERESY IS THIS ?
#BlameLorgar
(Loyalist Tantrum)
All quiet on the western front 40K Edition
51:09 Somewhere out there, an ork shed a single tear though he didn't know why.
Arch you are the Dan Carlin of warhammer. Thank you for the spectacular efforts you make to entertain us. This series has been incredible. What if Verdun and the Somme were MUCH worse and demons?
For maybe the first time in this series, I actually feel kind of...sorry...for the Death Korps troopers. I mean, yeah, they’ve been locked in a grinding, torturous siege for over a decade, but they’re *Kriegers.* War of attrition is their bread and butter, they get off on shovel-to-bayonet melee combat and artillery bombardments.
But seeing the corpses of their fallen comrades desecrated by the Archenemy? Seeing their brothers’ noble sacrifice be so horribly defiled? I know that “Death Korps of Krieg” and “Stiff Upper Lip” are practically synonymous, but I have trouble believing they wouldn’t be seething with rage at such an insult. And then to be ordered to fall back, denying them the chance to exact vengeance on the heretical scum for their crimes? Oof... *muffled screams of impotent rage intensify*
I have yet to come across a problem that couldn't be solved by simply bombing it into submission
Hans, get the -flamethrower- artillery... the heavy -flamerthrower- artillery.
@@Alex_Fahey The Russians have you covered on that front. en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/TOS-1
@@ozzyjames87 Wargame Red Dragon?
Didnt they try that for like 10 years? LOL
Totally look forward to each and every one of these videos. Bloody fantastic Arch!
Lord Inquisitor Hector "just as planed" Rex
Am I the only one who was thinking of Trooper by Iron Maiden when listening to the Seven Cavalry Companies charging into the enemy lines?
After all of this... an Exterminatus sounds like the rational choice.
Emperor be praised! A vraks lore vid, thanks arch!
Three lore videos in a week? Hope you are not overworking yourself their mate, but awesome job still!
Oh man you just made my work day. I am exceedingly pleased
Excellent timing I was just going through your videos while waiting for work to eventually end.
Legio Ignis Wolfhound packs armed with twin inferno cannons would be remarkably useful in this scenario. The rot of the plague god is nothing before the holy flames of the Omnissiah made manifest!!!
Another excellent video/audiobook, I don't even know anymore :D
the death rider charge art is some of the coolest stuff I've ever seen
The square root of 912.04 is 30.2... it all seemed harmless...
Vraks isn't obstinate it's just full of top decking. Vraks drew Exodia, activated a Miracle spell card, and pulled the psa 10 1st edition base charizard. These people should have just been a footnote under the power armor boot of a space marine. An entire army advance is stopped by chaos marines, loyalists take one position and they're done.
Signal: Tooot-toot-too-toooot.
Kriegsman#1: Whats that?
Kriegsman#2: I never heard this signal
Kriegsman #3: Me neither. Let's go on.
It was the signal for retreat they where hearing all along...
Green Hell? DA BOYZ ARE 'ERE, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHH!!
1 Death Rider Company: 65 Men
7×65=455
Out of 455 men mounted on something liken to a Clydesdale Grizzly bear armed with a Lance that essentially has an AT mine on the end of it... _Only 60 came back alive._
YES, i've been waiting for this so long i need to know what happens next. Also still wondering what happened to the Sisters of Battle from the beginning of this story.
madengineer 102 i image they were ether killed or sacrificed
@@theomnissiah-9120 They are still alive. Very unfortunately for them.
Elysian Kentarchy so soon to be sacrificed
@@theomnissiah-9120 heh, sweet summer child
raising there unwanted children
The Siege of Vraks: Green Hell Zone.
Vraks is looking more like green hell right now.
"Green is best." -Mork (possibly Gork)
*"BLESS ME! ROTFATHER!!"* As Marauder Bomber ordinance falls from above....
A green hell you say? Sounds like I need my shovel
*Giggling Gas Mask noise*
9 hours after listening to this I still have the image of Valkyrie from the MCU as a krig guardsman... and giggling
Internet make this happen
Giggling followed by coughing and gurgling as her lungs, trachea, and throat melt into organic sludge as the TP3 does its work.
@@IamBlackToast wouldn't have it any other way
@Drakon590 lol
Just that would be for the normies to recognize
@Drakon590 just found the combination funny, if I wanted a character to die horribly 40k style from marvel I would put captain marvel on the chopping board
Keep up the good work arch your lore videos are incredible
A fantastic video, and I've been so eager waiting for this Vraks vid! Keep up the great work:)
I almost cried when you said that out of the 7 companies of Death Riders only 16 men, heavily wounded, were alive at that night.. damn this series has gotten to me..
Thank the God Emperor. The Commisar would have me executed if i didn't update him on the situation on Vraks through my venerable vox-caster. I pray to the Emperor that further broadcasts will follow shortly without interferance.
It'll probably be both... | 2:50 - (gas mask muffled cheers) | 19:40 - Not the Ork definition then? (e.g. it's friendly, if it misses) | 24:22 - The Sons of Mortarion make a return. | 41:25 - They're too valuable to waste. | 50:50 - Orks just care that they kill something, it doesn't mean it has to be the enemy.
TY Arch for this & the vvhole Seige of Vraks series , it vvas so good I attempted to like every comment , may have been 15-30 shy of all of them. TY again & keep up the great vvork !
Aaand again Vraks proved that we can take a figure of speech and turn it into surreality: After all, the number of defenders was not the only thing that was melting away ^^
Vraks is ruled by Uncle Scourge? You are sitting on vast amounts of armory gear but they send out rag tag troops to fight
Scott MUrphy i think that by this point of the siege most of the competent soldiers on the traitor side were dead, Maning the fortress, or batshit insane
Krig guardsman Just one thing is missing to make this second home. We got the toxic gas and shell craters just needs a little radiation yep that would make it all perfect. Satisfied gas mask noise fixes bayonet
YEEES! I was so hoping for this yesterday, but I'll forgive you today!