Melancholy (piece 9)

Man, you ever feel like you just need to take a break? Not from work, or from hobbies, or even from people, but, just life in general? To be honest, I’m not even sure where I’m going in life; I sometimes just feel alone. I wish I could just talk to someone about it, but I feel that a lot of people understand that if you do,people will look at you a certain way afterwards. As men, we’re not allowed to show emotion, show that we hurt, we bleed, we suffer; and sometimes, it just builds up too much, like a damn that breaks from the pressure, I feel that a lot of us, just break down. We hide our shame, our grieving, our loneliness, our pain. I’m not even sure why I sit here and write this… I guess I hope someone can see me, hear my cries, and absolve me. But I am alone. This loneliness, it’s like something I can’t really describe, almost like when you are there for everyone, but when you need someone, no one’s there for you. You can be in a room full of people you think you know, yet you’re isolated, trapped by your own thoughts… I used to have dreams, but they’ve all fallen away from me; I tried to reach out to them, thinking maybe I can change, be someone else, but to no avail. I just hope that there’s someone out there, someone who cares.