Preventing Harm When Discussing Beliefs
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ม.ค. 2025
- Helping people with their beliefs without causing more harm.
This clip is from Talk Heathen 08.03 on January 21, 2023 with Doctor Ben and Jamie the Blind Limey!
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The caller needs to distinguish between "harm" and pain. Just because something may be painful doesn't mean it's harmful. Surgery is painful, but it is usually a necessary component to beneficial treatment. A truth can be painful but not correcting a harmful belief may cause even greater damage in the big picture...
Many people say religion gives them purpose, but it seems like it's often more just the illusion of purpose, because people keep telling them religion gives purpose, and everything (theoretically, but not practically) pales in comparison to eternity. But religion often doesn't affect their lives that much, and they actually find purpose in the same place where the rest of us do: with our friends and family and hobbies and job and such.
So I might at least lightly question whether they really find no meaning outside of religion (which could also help them see meaning where they didn't before, or help guide them to meaning). But therapy is certainly a good suggestion if that is the case.
"You're very intelligent so you wouldn't understand because this is about emotion, and you're just going to use your intellect over me"
This is honestly a rather mean thing to say, because it implies that intelligent people don't feel much emotion.
In any case, people might feel like you're "appealing to intelligence", so to speak, if you say things that go over their head, or you give the impression of "showing off". If you want to avoid this, don't throw out names of fallacies or syllogisms or say things like "as Plato says" or use big words. Just present things more as if they're your organic layperson thoughts and you're just having a layperson discussion.
Beyond that, they might feel like your intelligence would enable you to convince them of pretty much anything, or at least "win" any debate. For that, I would emphasise that it's not a competition. You want to understand where they're coming from, and explain where you're coming from, to hopefully get either or both of you closer to believing what's true. I would also ask them: if God doesn't exist, would they want to know that, because if not, it's probably better to not have that discussion.
You can have family members who you don't want to loose. Who you think are basically good people. My parents are divorced when I was 17. My mother has a "boyfriend". 25y+ relationship. Her "boyfriend" has highly religious family. They are "put in their place" so the religious aspect is not a central topic anymore. I'm a "loud" atheist. My mother is a "silent" but they can forgive her because she raised catholic.... I was "raised" as David Attenborough-ist... (secular).
I think as long as people are willing and able to accept who I am, I am willing and able to do the same. If they make it clear that they can't/won't do that, then they have to go, regardless of how much I love them or believe they are otherwise a good person. I can love you and believe that you're a good person, while not wanting anything to do with you because your presence is corrosive to my mental health.
@@sirjazzaroth My view on forgiveness. People make mistakes. You can forgive them. But. It does not mean that you allow them to behave badly towards you.
Sometimes you can be attached to your rage so much, that true forgiveness is impossible for you. You must try it regardless.
I don't believe in free will. What I think about it, it is almost 100% that Sam Harris says about it.
Also I believe that if someone is a god believer that is impossible for them to have a true spiritual experience. When they can have an experience without judgement.
It would be a lie to say that I don't "hate" people but trying my "best".