Life as a transgender man: Thomas Page McBee on masculinity
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 พ.ย. 2018
- Transgender author Thomas Page McBee shares what he has learnt about toxic masculinity, and so-called 'male privilege,' through his transition as a #transgender man. Thomas also does #boxing and says we should challenge how we think about #masculinity.
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The funny thing is that at night, your more likely to be attack.
Only because we're more likely to be in those situations
@@xavmanisdabestest Of course, cause women don't go out on saturday nights, right?
Masculinity isn't toxic.
The transition from recruit to veteran difficulty
I don't think women being scared of me is much of a privilege to be honest.
really, that's what you focus on?
of course this is not a privilege.
but for f* sake, maybe you can produce the thought in your brain that not having to fear every shadow on the street as a potential rapist is some sort of privilege?
sorry. didn't wan't to come across to aggro.
it's just always those of us men,
who jump at the first opportunity of finding a hole... in an argument, in ... well...
instead you could think and resonate with what is being said.
with what is the core of truth.
a truth which is hard to swallow.
but swallow you must. or stay shallow...
@@fatalmystic why are so emotional about this? It'ss his experience, that's how he feels, you cant invalidate that.
@@pocenhayou seem pretty emotional too.. here’s a fact of life: people feel stuff.
It would be iquite nteresting to hear other transgender men and women on the same topic.
I think what can help in these situations is to realize the history involving non-binary and trans-individuals. Conquistadors detailed trans indigenous people throughout South, Central and North America in their diaries and reports back to Spain. The oldest evidence for trans people can be found in one of the oldest samples of writing which is about 2,500 BC in India. In other words, trans and non-binary are NOT a modern invention. They have been among us forever (my female partner of 20+ years identifies as a trans-woman, I identify as a cisgendered woman and we are both proud Great grandmothers.)
Another piece is that genetically, many Transmen can pass down genetic traits only passed down through men, the contrary is true for trans-women. Medical imaging that reveals patterns that tend to skew male versus female support the previous statement. Thus, this isn't just "in their heads" - its genetically driven (how else does a 5 year old realize that they are the wrong gender, regardless if their family is gender-aware/supportive or the opposite?)
I struggled with my own sexuality when it came to Transmen as I find them hot as HE_L. As a Dy_e, was I seeing them as women and thus I was attracted to them, but also simultaneously not honoring their chosen identity? I came to the conclusion that I must not be 100% Dy_e, and that my attraction continued along the continuum to include some men.
So Thomas, you rock and are brave. Way to go and you have my full support ! Go LGBTQI ! ! ! ! :-)
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so interesting
Men being promoted quicker is so fucking true even if the women is better I notice this a lot
It has everything to do with men being more likely than women to ask for promotions and raises. If women want to be promoted as quickly and as much as men, then they should make the same effort as men. It’s that simple.
@@bigfranchise not true its not “everything to do”. Why do men hate admitting that women are demonized in the workplace. Women are critiqued more harshly and painted as too aggressive when they are disagreeable men are rewarded. Stop being an idiot about reality
If testosterone doesn't make you more agressive, why do men reach the agression peaks when testosterone is higher? Why male and female behaviour is so much similar once testosterone is gone (65+ yo)?
He said testosterone makes you status seeking. And as long as society rewards men for being a man that other men are afraid of.
@@JustAboutToEat No, he said he was not scared anymore. It has nothing to do with status, but aggression. He wanted to say he was status seeker now, but in fact he just backed up the counter argument with his own experience.
Sure is a lot of transphobia around here...
Don't let these morons get you down, Thomas, wherever you are. Thanks for this video!
#transrightsarehumanrights
This woman is a man-hating ideologue who doesn't have a clue what she's talking about. Literally every single thing she talked about in this video was a lie. And provably so.
Phobia means to fear. I dont sense any fear here in the comments.
All this turmoil and effort to become a professional grifter.
There is no such a thing as toxic masculinity. Masculity is the raw model for men, and every single person loves masculine men, whether they admit it or not. When you need a problem solver, you call a masculine man. When you need emotional support, you call a femenine woman.
What you call toxic masculinity is just bad people who happened to be a man. Same applies to toxic femeninity.
Facts. People who think men are not supposed to show and express emotion is toxic, doesnt matter if its a man or woman. A men should be masculine, strong physically and mentally, but crying does not show you are mentally weak. In fact, desperately trying to hide all emotion is
Fact:
A recent meta-analysis across the developed world proved that women have a hiring advantage over men. Women were particularly more advantaged in female dominated spaces, whereas men received no such special treatment in male dominated spaces.
This is further supported by the fact that in STEM particularly (arguably the most prominent or most talked about male dominated professional space) women have a TWO TO ONE hiring advantage in certain positions. This isn't even mentioning the fact that if you take a multivariate analysis on male vs female earnings, women actually OUTEARN men if all else is equal & are actually promoted at higher rates.
Fact:
Studies on (un)conscious bias by the journal of personality & social psychology show that ANTI-MALE bias is *much* more significant than even race-bias... and that people in general (meaning men & women) have a PRO-FEMALE bias on average. Women in particular are rather extreme in their in-group bias, which studies from the American Psychology Association (a shamelessly anti-male institution btw, which explicitly labelled masculinity a force of destruction that leads to death & crime) prove is at least FIVE times greater than its male counterpart.
Fact:
Crime data from the FBI or the Department of Justice have shown that MEN are the majority victims of ALL violent crime. In fact, men are the overwhelming majority of victims of (public) violence in *EVERY* country on Earth.
And yet here we are, with biological women who don't have a goddamn clue what being a man is actually about, lecturing men about their "privilege" in regards to systems, institutions or issues that OBJECTIVELY are worse for men.
So she can say - in her endless ignorance - that "transitioning" exposed her to all these "male privileges", but the fact of the matter is, when she claims she was "promoted more quickly & taken more seriously", that's a blatant lie. There is ZERO evidence to prove this is the case & MOUNTAINS of evidence to prove the opposite is true. But these people don't care because they don't deal in reality. They deal exclusively in feelings.
Case in point: "women feel afraid of being alone in public" is seen as "proof" that "women are more likely to be attacked". These feelings don't match reality & men's stoic obliviousness to their own victimization rates/risks is not evidence of some kind of "male privilege". Men are not unfazed because they "experience less crime". They are unfazed IN SPITE of experiencing crime at SEVERAL TIMES the rate of women.
What a time to be alive!! I think it’s wonderful that people in todays society are free to be who they are and not be afraid to show the world their vulnerabilities. 100 years ago we would have to pay to see these people in a freak show, now they’re simply everywhere! Keep up the great work. Very entertaining :) sorry for my English. Love from Thailand
Isn't your feelings you. And having everyone scared of you is a privilege
Stuttering on the words 'Toxic Masculinity', and speaking of it as though it was a real thing, yet at the same time as being at pains to separate the myth and realities of testosterone. There is something sad about his confusion about masculinity, though masculinity was obviously important enough for him to go through such an extraordinarily invasive transition. Being less afraid at night is not a privilege, its a feeling, and actually an illusion if you are at greater risk. Being perceived as a threat to others when you are not, is not a privilege either. The reason men dont talk about their feelings is because they are not important to anyone else, and it advertises the fact that you are not prioritising others, which is what everyone expects of men. Hence the feminist terminology and the way this entire monologue is framed contextually.
You do realise that Healthy Masculinity exists right? Toxic Masculinity is the antithesis to Healthy Masculinity.
Also you seem to miscomprehend, not being afraid at night IS a privilege (not just simply the feeling) if you take into account of who is more likely to get attacked - THAT'S what he meant. E.g. it's a privilege being rich because you can buy a lot of things it's not just simply a feeling of being rich. Being a man you can walk anywhere at night without a threat of violence - get it?
Not talking about your feelings is what Toxic Masculinity says you must do and is upheld by society. Healthy Masculinity is reimagining and restructuring that so men can.
@@A__Love Factually wrong. Men are four times more likely to be attacked than women, and rationally they would have more reason to be afraid than women when walking out at night. There is also the social expectation that they should put themselves in danger to protect women. Men are expected to absorb and dispense violence to make sure women dont have to. The Healthy masculinity and the toxic masculinity of which you speak are considerably overlapping in a Venn diagram, and both are defined by women capriciously according to how they feel. Two men behaving precisely the same towards a woman will be interpreted in entirely different ways. One will be unwanted sexual attention, eg harassment, the other 'healthy masculinity' eg confidently taking the risk of rejection so that she doesn't have to. The conflicting expectations put upon men by women are well proven in social experiments. It would surely be the same mistake or even a bigger one, for men to focus on keeping their masculinity 'healthy' according to women, as it would be for women to allow their femininity to be defined by men. I have not yet heard any transgender men celebrating their patriarchy membership and all the supposed benefits that come with it. I am sixty and still waiting for mine.
Why would the fact men are far more likely to be attacked at night as backed by every single crime statistic (unlike feminist propaganda) be a "privilege"? What kind of mental gymnastics do you have to jump through to come up with this insanity? Men are more likely to be attacked yet less likely to complain about it or act like it's the world against them and therefore it makes them privileged? So to be victim you just have to whine, complain and bitch a lot? Gotcha... Sounds about right for your average feminist or any millennial "victim" who's been pampered and spoiled in America from birth yet pretends they're a victim who had it tough. Meanwhile people born in to 3rd world poverty on the streets with no family or support who become successful never once consider themselves a victim or in need of twitter "poor you" comments unlike spoiled first class Americans of all colors, sexes, genders, sizes, religions etc etc.
Grow up and take responsibility for your life and your emotions. If you live in a first world country none of that shit matters or will ever hold you back unless you allow it.
@@A__Love you make interesting points about Masculinity, but it is not true that women are more likely to be assaulted at night. A man is more likely to be assaulted, but both men and women are more likely to be assaulted by a man.
So i dont think men vs women is a good frame for the issue of assault at night, but men and women protecting themselves from people with mal intent.
@@A__Love Who gets to define what "healthy" masculinity looks like? Women like you & "Thomas"? Now isn't that just convenient? Because last I checked, ANY time men dictate to women how to be "real" women, or express "healthy" femininity, you lot uniroincally accuse these men of "toxic masculinity".
_"not being afraid at night IS a privilege (not just simply the feeling) if you take into account of who is more likely to get attacked - THAT'S what he meant"_
How funny... because crime data by the DOJ & FBI prove that *MEN* are the ones who are VASTLY more likely to experience violent crime & it's not even close. This is true in every country on the planet btw, for all of recorded history.
So yes, it is very much a "feeling", bc women's paranoid & misandrist fear of all men is not based in statistical reality. It isn't the result of women "being more likely to be attacked" because that is statistically NOT the case. It's purely an emotion & that emotion doesn't make you more vulnerable to violence, just like men not experiencing these asinine feelings doesn't mean they are less likely to be attacked. You simply don't have a clue what you're talking about, because you live in your little progressive female bubble where ACTUAL men's experiences & opinions are never discussed & are treated with nothing but contempt & hate.
Greek gods, male privilege same thing both are mythology.
There is no legal or governmental right that a man has that a woman doesn’t.
Chloe no response got it
@@stovas8609 Except when we leave the fluffy bunny world of black ink on white paper and enter the realm of... the people ... you would be able to see multiple occassions each and every day in a "normal" city. just need to crank up the empathy. someday we men may learn to... i hope for us...
In addition to these bought-and-paid-for propaganda peddlers, I have seen many more trans people admit living as a man in the Western world is harder. That's one reason statistics show MTF are more common than FTM. People are transitioning more to where life is better.
Women being afraid of you based on what gender you appear to be is a form of discrimination, not privilege. Think about it: women are more afraid of black men than other races--is that "black male privilege"?
The fact is that men get attacked on the street at higher rates than women, so men have more fact-based reasons to fear walking alone at night. Women fearing men is based more on prejudice against men than on real dangers.
THATS A WOMAN LMAO
But he goes by he him 0:11
I think it's funny hearing them talk about how their deep voice is what causes people to listen to them. I don't think that's what it is ... and that voice is only deep if you're comparing it to a woman's. Definitely the typical transman voice.
He still has some woman manners
Mrs Obama get down!
I wonder why... 😂
Because SHE is a woman.
Men ourselves? Nice joke there lol
There's still a lot of ... how shall I say it ... femininity coming out in what she's saying. Men don't talk about how they can be less man like or that their masculinity is such a problem. This is woke, 4th wave feminist speech (surprise, MOSTLY WOMEN) here. This person seems rational enough, but she's still a woman living her life thinking it's somehow easier looking like a man.
Gosh... Such a transphobic coment
@@User-xt4cthow about disproving their argument instead of jumping straight to insults.