In Germany we have a growing problem with DBT-PTSD becoming the dominant technique in trauma clinics. It is a manualized approach that uses DBT-Skill-supported PE (patients listening to recording on their own in their rooms). The DBT Skills are meant to keep the dissociation down. A lot of people with structural dissociation are getting hurt. It is still advertised as being specifically for dissociative people. We spent 8 years on stabilization. We are working on trauma now, for short intervals every 4 months. It is really impressive how easy and smooth it is going (compared to earlier experiences). I can just recommend building good foundations. It makes everything so much safer later on. The manualized approach that tells people what to do in which week of treatment isn't working!
@@thectadclinic my therapist is the former head of psychology from a clinic that adopted the new program. He left because he refused to do it and I can see him in private practice now. What a blessing. Sad to have lost access to a clinic though.
I was very much a “make me well as fast as possible” type of person, until I began to understand the subconscious nature of DID. I now know I can only go at the rate my parts are able. Just because I can do something quickly doesn’t mean they can. It’s frustrating and humbling. I’ve learned a lot about trauma filtered through different parts. Thank you for these videos. They are always comforting and informative. 💜
Saaaaame 😭 It took me so much time to understand that this is too much of a complex disorder to "heal" within like a year of therapy. I was like "ok I‘ll do a year or two of therapy and then it‘ll get better" and I was wrong… it‘s incredibly frustrating.
@@oliverperry9731 One clinic I was in said they see it as dangerous since it can load more on the plate than is handlable to the brain pretty quickly, and then what? Cause you then have the disadvatages without the advantage or purpose of the disorder and that‘s horrible to live through and can do more damage than the disorder itself. If that‘s what professionals say I‘d not risk that tbh
My former NHS therapist (who knew about CPTSD and dissociation but never acknowledged DID) was definitely a "go as fast as possible person" She forced me to write out all of my trauma in a list and read it out to her over many painful sessions. She said her techniques could heal trauma very quickly and when I said we were going too quickly she said it wasn't possible to go any slower. Surprise surprise I got a lot worse! Thankfully now I have a private therapist that understands and we go very slowly and actually spend most of the time helping me navigate everyday life and resilience
I’m so sorry you had that go on too. My previous therapist wasn’t particularly well informed about trauma and she got me to write out the story of all of my major traumatic experiences (like writing them out as a first person story) and I had to read them out loud to her in session. It was horrific, and from what I understand this is the treatment practice used here as well for treating veterans with combat trauma. I can’t even believe they’d put veterans through that too… 😓
The graphics and word pictures were very effective. A few made me giggle. :) This is a timely topic for me. My memory is so fuzzy and spotty that I often don't know what progress has been made. I simply cannot believe that I've been in therapy for 3.5 years at twice a week sessions. It does feel like nothing is being accomplished and yet when I'm able to think about where I was back then, I can see progress. Eg... not as many headaches, not as much DP/DR, intermittant foggy states now as opposed to all day every day. I've become more social, more oriented to the day to day, more aware of "Parts" when I used to throw up when even hearing about it from the therapist. I've come to shame myself for not being healed as I think I should be, or at the slow pace, I can become impatient, so thanks for reminding me that THIS IS THE POINT.... I'm gonna be okay now being a tortoise and hiding under my shell will now be a necessary component instead of trying to sprint like a hare. he he he
Sometimes these videos act as touchstones to get me through the next moment. Thank you so much. Sometimes its hard not to view this journey as a fight for one's life. A stolen life I want back.
Thanks. When I went back into therapy, I’d heard so much about the “new” CBT that had revolutionized the practice. So I expected to get “fixed” in 10 sessions….now, sixish years into the process, and no, I’m not stuck, just slowly resolving the onion layers.
To be honest, I kinda wanna just go for it and be done with it. So many years of just all sorts of therapy and stuff and still stuck as we are, even if changes have happened through out the years. I'm totally such a horrible "Let's dive in to anything we need to, I'm not scared! It'll hurt anyway!" and you're right.. I should be more considerate towards the others.. As awful as it sounds.. sometimes I forget I'm not the only one in this body.. Also, there was supposed to be psychotherapy, but.. we didn't get it. And now we're back stuck with our gov support system saying that "You're good enough for work!" but also "You're totally not good enough for psychotherapy, you need more stabilizing first!" Like... make up your damn minds, I can't do anything atm!
Yeahhhh, relatable... I'm only now getting into dissociation-related issues w/ my therapist after seeing her for a year & a half. And I've ALWAYS been Team Rip-The-Bandaid-Off-QUICKLY... I have trauma? Great, EMDR now. I get a block because of dissociating during EMDR & not being able to learn anything? Great, DBT now. But as quickly as I want to go, roadblocks appear to slow me down & it seems like I'm being prevented from going at the pace I want to... Namely, the pace that prevents me from dwelling on uncomfortable shit. 🙃
We have had a few years of shockingly bad therapy, meaning them not being as trauma-informed as their bio said they were. I have learned that where you live affects what is available. Because of this, and after waiting a year to find a place, we can finally move to a different city, in two weeks. The last four years in this city have caused a sense of using up all the house we had already built. We were stripped all the way back down to the floor. Sadly we now have therapy trauma, which is a complicated wall to try and rebuild. The specialised help needed when dealing with huge amounts of trauma is hard to find. We have now become completely suspicious of any therapist, meaning it is so easy for them to say they are trauma-informed and have the skills etc., that this will make us slow down, which in some ways I think is a good thing. Spent a lifetime just wanting to quickly heal, whereas what you say is far more important. Thank you as always.
First of all; congrats to the new place! 🥳 Secondly, yes. While I didn’t develop therapy trauma, it very much still is a big problem to find a therapist who actually knows anything about dissociative disorders. My tip is: find someone younger (30-40) who previously has worked in a psychiatry or clinic. Their college education has had more likely included dissociative disorders than older therapists, and clinics and psychiatries are the only place you will at least sometimes have had to work with dissociative patients before, especially in big clinics or if it‘s the only one in the area (if you‘re suspicious of them lying that they have). I asked them in the e-mail if they have worked with (p)DID systems before, before even scheduling a meeting to rule out anybody who wrote "no but I can do traumatherapy" for. This. Exact. Reason.
Thank you for this video. I am the patient dashing ahead like the hare. I do it because I am getting old and I am very, very fearful of dementia getting overlaid onto the dissociation. Do you have any information about helping people with DID/OSDD and dementia?
During my first therapeutic period I began very slowly to move. My therapist found out how to begin with an intellectual distant approach like telling me, that I needed to begin moving just a tiny bit and later on., that I needed to try to relate to her and the group. Slowly I was able open up for just my eyes in the room and not in the trees outside. It took two years and medication before my fear of her and the others was relieved just enough. The last three years I was able to speed up and ten seconds of eye contact was enough to tell me that I was not an evil outlaw but a person. After the first one and a half my fears of being crazy and hurt my children had almost passed. She was extremely good for me as a therapist.
Your videos are well timed as per usual. Started with a new therapist just today and a part of me wants to rush in and get it all over and done with. But then I get out of the session and feel regretful for saying what I said. Maybe I need to take a step back and ensure I don't leave the other parts behind when I go through all this stuff.
I had session with Mike and wished there were professional therapists in the Netherlands who could treat DID. It’s really pathetic that so many institutes claim to know it all but 99% of them know absolute shit.
Hi, Dr. Lloyd! I’m not sure if this is something you’ve covered already, but just in case: I hear you talk a lot about clinical assistance in helping someone discover their system in as easy and harmless a way as possible, as it is a very delicate process. I’d really like to hear any clinical perspective you or your colleagues might have on people who come in for therapy who have discovered their system already. For us (my system and me), we have slowly come to discover one another and work through denial, which all had to be done by ourself or with our peers/loved ones, and it wasn’t until working through the denial (for the most part) that we were able to seek out treatment. I’d just like to know what clinical perspective you might have on those who come to your clinic who are already fully aware of their system. Thanks! ❤ Max
Thanks for your work and informations!❤ Do you have ecperiences with chronic depersonalization and derealization? I've tried so many things...nearly 20 years now. Thank you.
In what timeframe would you say there should be a sense of 'getting better'? I've just ended another therapy after one and a half years without seeing much results. I'm on year seven now without a helpful therapy and I've sort of given up. Therapy has only ever made me worse or it didn't help. Even after looking for trauma therapists with experience in dissociation. Thank you for your videos, it's clear you really care about people.
Seven years and you aren’t feeling better seems like too much. I have worked with a person for two and a half years and the real results came at that stage. It happened quickly, like it was just waiting and when ready, boom.
How do you deal with it when amnesia blocks out a therapy session? We had a session last week and only remember the very end when our therapist asked if we wanted to arrange an extra midweek session, which caused us to panic a bit because we are struggling to afford just one session a week right now. We then spent the rest of the day with only tiny snapshots of being in places we haven't been in 30-40 years. We don't know if we just forgot, if we switched and someone else was there during the session, or really much of anything except those odd bits and pieces.
@@ElenaAideen in our clinic, we write notes for every sessions, and patients with amnesia are given the notes (via email) if they want them. This can help get through the amnesia at times, or at least gives an overview if recall is absent.
Please learn how to get your system to allow you to be present, and not have them take over. And your therapist should be helping you come back and leave in better shape than you are now when session is finished. You are right; you are not getting your money's worth if you have no ability to apply learning to daily life.
@@Cathy-xi8cb well that's kinda rude, I'm just very recently become aware of being plural. I'm sorry my internal communication isn't up to your standards immediately upon learning that that's a thing we need to work on. As for whether our therapist is worth what we are paying them. Mind your own damn business. They obviously understand we need extra support right now and wanted to discuss that. It's almost like they're trying to help us stabilize. Gee, like that's what should be happening right?
@@ElenaAideen No criticism for not knowing how to do any of this; just hoping you have access to effective strategies that would help you, and that you clearly want to learn. Nobody's internal communication is great; that is what structural dissociation damages in the first place. All therapists would want to know that their session increases your dissociation for that day, and would want to help you with this. Wishing you the best, even with your defensive and aggressive response.
Thank you for this! I'm still in the stabilisation phase. It feels like I'm not progressing very much. I try not to be hard on myself. I will be a tortoise 😊 it has always taken me some time to process things.
was ist „PE“? ich kenne mich leider zu wenig aus, um zu verstehen, was das Problem ist, aber würde es gerne verstehen, um in Zukunft besser entscheiden zu können, welche Behandlungen ich mir vorstellen kann 🙈
When do you admit that you've tried therapy, and it hasn't worked. Two years? Five? Ten? I mean, I've been told to go slow, it's a gradual process, but how do you know it's time to admit it just hasn't worked, for you?
In Germany we have a growing problem with DBT-PTSD becoming the dominant technique in trauma clinics. It is a manualized approach that uses DBT-Skill-supported PE (patients listening to recording on their own in their rooms). The DBT Skills are meant to keep the dissociation down. A lot of people with structural dissociation are getting hurt. It is still advertised as being specifically for dissociative people. We spent 8 years on stabilization. We are working on trauma now, for short intervals every 4 months. It is really impressive how easy and smooth it is going (compared to earlier experiences). I can just recommend building good foundations. It makes everything so much safer later on. The manualized approach that tells people what to do in which week of treatment isn't working!
Glad you found your space to do this!
@@thectadclinic my therapist is the former head of psychology from a clinic that adopted the new program. He left because he refused to do it and I can see him in private practice now. What a blessing. Sad to have lost access to a clinic though.
…Und das obwohl es schon bloß ne Handvoll Traumakliniken in Deutschland gibt 🙃
@@blue-uv4mh manche sind auch echt stabil. aber für DIS weiß ich grad wirklich nicht mehr, was ich empfehlen soll, wenn ich gefragt werde.
I was very much a “make me well as fast as possible” type of person, until I began to understand the subconscious nature of DID. I now know I can only go at the rate my parts are able. Just because I can do something quickly doesn’t mean they can. It’s frustrating and humbling. I’ve learned a lot about trauma filtered through different parts.
Thank you for these videos. They are always comforting and informative. 💜
That’s spot on, go at the pace that is needed.
Saaaaame 😭
It took me so much time to understand that this is too much of a complex disorder to "heal" within like a year of therapy. I was like "ok I‘ll do a year or two of therapy and then it‘ll get better" and I was wrong… it‘s incredibly frustrating.
What are your thoughts on using Rapid transformational therapy, which uses hypnosis, for potential or diagnosed DID or OSDD patients?
Yeah same here 😭
@@oliverperry9731 One clinic I was in said they see it as dangerous since it can load more on the plate than is handlable to the brain pretty quickly, and then what? Cause you then have the disadvatages without the advantage or purpose of the disorder and that‘s horrible to live through and can do more damage than the disorder itself. If that‘s what professionals say I‘d not risk that tbh
My former NHS therapist (who knew about CPTSD and dissociation but never acknowledged DID) was definitely a "go as fast as possible person" She forced me to write out all of my trauma in a list and read it out to her over many painful sessions. She said her techniques could heal trauma very quickly and when I said we were going too quickly she said it wasn't possible to go any slower. Surprise surprise I got a lot worse!
Thankfully now I have a private therapist that understands and we go very slowly and actually spend most of the time helping me navigate everyday life and resilience
I’m so sorry you had that go on too. My previous therapist wasn’t particularly well informed about trauma and she got me to write out the story of all of my major traumatic experiences (like writing them out as a first person story) and I had to read them out loud to her in session. It was horrific, and from what I understand this is the treatment practice used here as well for treating veterans with combat trauma. I can’t even believe they’d put veterans through that too… 😓
The graphics and word pictures were very effective. A few made me giggle. :) This is a timely topic for me. My memory is so fuzzy and spotty that I often don't know what progress has been made. I simply cannot believe that I've been in therapy for 3.5 years at twice a week sessions. It does feel like nothing is being accomplished and yet when I'm able to think about where I was back then, I can see progress. Eg... not as many headaches, not as much DP/DR, intermittant foggy states now as opposed to all day every day. I've become more social, more oriented to the day to day, more aware of "Parts" when I used to throw up when even hearing about it from the therapist. I've come to shame myself for not being healed as I think I should be, or at the slow pace, I can become impatient, so thanks for reminding me that THIS IS THE POINT.... I'm gonna be okay now being a tortoise and hiding under my shell will now be a necessary component instead of trying to sprint like a hare. he he he
Tortoises are the absolute best!
Sometimes these videos act as touchstones to get me through the next moment. Thank you so much. Sometimes its hard not to view this journey as a fight for one's life. A stolen life I want back.
Thanks. When I went back into therapy, I’d heard so much about the “new” CBT that had revolutionized the practice. So I expected to get “fixed” in 10 sessions….now, sixish years into the process, and no, I’m not stuck, just slowly resolving the onion layers.
To be honest, I kinda wanna just go for it and be done with it. So many years of just all sorts of therapy and stuff and still stuck as we are, even if changes have happened through out the years. I'm totally such a horrible "Let's dive in to anything we need to, I'm not scared! It'll hurt anyway!" and you're right.. I should be more considerate towards the others.. As awful as it sounds.. sometimes I forget I'm not the only one in this body..
Also, there was supposed to be psychotherapy, but.. we didn't get it. And now we're back stuck with our gov support system saying that "You're good enough for work!" but also "You're totally not good enough for psychotherapy, you need more stabilizing first!" Like... make up your damn minds, I can't do anything atm!
Yeahhhh, relatable... I'm only now getting into dissociation-related issues w/ my therapist after seeing her for a year & a half. And I've ALWAYS been Team Rip-The-Bandaid-Off-QUICKLY... I have trauma? Great, EMDR now. I get a block because of dissociating during EMDR & not being able to learn anything? Great, DBT now. But as quickly as I want to go, roadblocks appear to slow me down & it seems like I'm being prevented from going at the pace I want to... Namely, the pace that prevents me from dwelling on uncomfortable shit. 🙃
We have had a few years of shockingly bad therapy, meaning them not being as trauma-informed as their bio said they were. I have learned that where you live affects what is available. Because of this, and after waiting a year to find a place, we can finally move to a different city, in two weeks. The last four years in this city have caused a sense of using up all the house we had already built. We were stripped all the way back down to the floor. Sadly we now have therapy trauma, which is a complicated wall to try and rebuild. The specialised help needed when dealing with huge amounts of trauma is hard to find. We have now become completely suspicious of any therapist, meaning it is so easy for them to say they are trauma-informed and have the skills etc., that this will make us slow down, which in some ways I think is a good thing. Spent a lifetime just wanting to quickly heal, whereas what you say is far more important. Thank you as always.
First of all; congrats to the new place! 🥳
Secondly, yes. While I didn’t develop therapy trauma, it very much still is a big problem to find a therapist who actually knows anything about dissociative disorders. My tip is: find someone younger (30-40) who previously has worked in a psychiatry or clinic. Their college education has had more likely included dissociative disorders than older therapists, and clinics and psychiatries are the only place you will at least sometimes have had to work with dissociative patients before, especially in big clinics or if it‘s the only one in the area (if you‘re suspicious of them lying that they have). I asked them in the e-mail if they have worked with (p)DID systems before, before even scheduling a meeting to rule out anybody who wrote "no but I can do traumatherapy" for. This. Exact. Reason.
@@blue-uv4mh thank you! That is such great advice ☺️
Thank you for this video. I am the patient dashing ahead like the hare. I do it because I am getting old and I am very, very fearful of dementia getting overlaid onto the dissociation. Do you have any information about helping people with DID/OSDD and dementia?
During my first therapeutic period I began very slowly to move. My therapist found out how to begin with an intellectual distant approach like telling me, that I needed to begin moving just a tiny bit and later on., that I needed to try to relate to her and the group. Slowly I was able open up for just my eyes in the room and not in the trees outside. It took two years and medication before my fear of her and the others was relieved just enough. The last three years I was able to speed up and ten seconds of eye contact was enough to tell me that I was not an evil outlaw but a person. After the first one and a half my fears of being crazy and hurt my children had almost passed. She was extremely good for me as a therapist.
Thanks Dr. Mike. I’m always in a hurry. Thanks again for the encouragement 💙👊🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
You are so welcome!
Your videos are well timed as per usual. Started with a new therapist just today and a part of me wants to rush in and get it all over and done with. But then I get out of the session and feel regretful for saying what I said. Maybe I need to take a step back and ensure I don't leave the other parts behind when I go through all this stuff.
Sounds like you have great insight of what different parts want. Hope you find a way through!
I had session with Mike and wished there were professional therapists in the Netherlands who could treat DID. It’s really pathetic that so many institutes claim to know it all but 99% of them know absolute shit.
Glad to see you are doing well. Thank you for this information. 😊
Hey, Girl! 😜
@@DIDHatchery hey! 🙈
Love Dr. Mike's information!
@@alittlespacetimeMe too! He’s so helpful! 🫶
We dig before we build.... this makes a lot of sense. Thanks a lot once again, Dr ❤
Wonderful!
Hi, Dr. Lloyd!
I’m not sure if this is something you’ve covered already, but just in case: I hear you talk a lot about clinical assistance in helping someone discover their system in as easy and harmless a way as possible, as it is a very delicate process. I’d really like to hear any clinical perspective you or your colleagues might have on people who come in for therapy who have discovered their system already.
For us (my system and me), we have slowly come to discover one another and work through denial, which all had to be done by ourself or with our peers/loved ones, and it wasn’t until working through the denial (for the most part) that we were able to seek out treatment.
I’d just like to know what clinical perspective you might have on those who come to your clinic who are already fully aware of their system.
Thanks! ❤
Max
Thanks for your work and informations!❤ Do you have ecperiences with chronic depersonalization and derealization? I've tried so many things...nearly 20 years now. Thank you.
Thank you for this reminder! I do enjoy your videos, and this as well!
I'm so glad!
Thank you Dr Mike, this was extremely helpful for me. Very easy to understand and thought provoking 🤔 I always look forward to your videos xx
Glad it was helpful!
Thank you so much for this video! Very helpful and validating!
Glad it was helpful!
In what timeframe would you say there should be a sense of 'getting better'? I've just ended another therapy after one and a half years without seeing much results. I'm on year seven now without a helpful therapy and I've sort of given up. Therapy has only ever made me worse or it didn't help. Even after looking for trauma therapists with experience in dissociation. Thank you for your videos, it's clear you really care about people.
Seven years and you aren’t feeling better seems like too much. I have worked with a person for two and a half years and the real results came at that stage. It happened quickly, like it was just waiting and when ready, boom.
How do you deal with it when amnesia blocks out a therapy session?
We had a session last week and only remember the very end when our therapist asked if we wanted to arrange an extra midweek session, which caused us to panic a bit because we are struggling to afford just one session a week right now. We then spent the rest of the day with only tiny snapshots of being in places we haven't been in 30-40 years. We don't know if we just forgot, if we switched and someone else was there during the session, or really much of anything except those odd bits and pieces.
@@ElenaAideen in our clinic, we write notes for every sessions, and patients with amnesia are given the notes (via email) if they want them. This can help get through the amnesia at times, or at least gives an overview if recall is absent.
@@thectadclinic Thank you! Will discuss making an arrangement like this with our therapist.
Please learn how to get your system to allow you to be present, and not have them take over. And your therapist should be helping you come back and leave in better shape than you are now when session is finished. You are right; you are not getting your money's worth if you have no ability to apply learning to daily life.
@@Cathy-xi8cb well that's kinda rude, I'm just very recently become aware of being plural. I'm sorry my internal communication isn't up to your standards immediately upon learning that that's a thing we need to work on. As for whether our therapist is worth what we are paying them. Mind your own damn business. They obviously understand we need extra support right now and wanted to discuss that. It's almost like they're trying to help us stabilize. Gee, like that's what should be happening right?
@@ElenaAideen No criticism for not knowing how to do any of this; just hoping you have access to effective strategies that would help you, and that you clearly want to learn. Nobody's internal communication is great; that is what structural dissociation damages in the first place. All therapists would want to know that their session increases your dissociation for that day, and would want to help you with this. Wishing you the best, even with your defensive and aggressive response.
Thank you for this! I'm still in the stabilisation phase. It feels like I'm not progressing very much. I try not to be hard on myself. I will be a tortoise 😊 it has always taken me some time to process things.
You can do it!
@@thectadclinic thank you 🥹🩷
Thanks for another great video.
Thanks for watching!
Thank you 😩😥😣😭
Good advise sir
was ist „PE“? ich kenne mich leider zu wenig aus, um zu verstehen, was das Problem ist, aber würde es gerne verstehen, um in Zukunft besser entscheiden zu können, welche Behandlungen ich mir vorstellen kann 🙈
When do you admit that you've tried therapy, and it hasn't worked. Two years? Five? Ten? I mean, I've been told to go slow, it's a gradual process, but how do you know it's time to admit it just hasn't worked, for you?