I totally get where you're coming from. As an over 50 woman starting again, I came to realise that we all fall for society's ideal of a partner and 2.4 kids. But in reality, it's not always the case. Life experiences has taught me that we need to be whole in ourself and like you say, someone who comes along needs to complement our wholeness, not complete us.
I just wanted to express my appreciation for the delivery. Your vocal pacing is calm, not under or overly emotional, not floating in contemplation or sitting in sorrow. The concept resonates with so many of us, and it was beautifully told, too.
Thank you so much 🥹 I never wanted it to come across as ‘poor me’ - because that isn’t where I’m coming from. It’s just the facts of where I’m at in my life. It’s no sad (certainly not happy) but it’s just life right now ✨
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I definitely get that relationships come with their own challenges, but I still think there’s something meaningful in having someone to share the load with. It’s not about perfection, just hoping for the right balance when the time comes. ✨
@@the.ashfileswhen I was with the wrong person, I carried their weight and it was at times suffocating. No I am with the right person for me…. It’s like being in immense peace, warmth and comfort. After suffering severe violence with the wrong person, I longed for the peace of solitude and inner peace. But along came the right person, so share this inner peace with. Keep an eye open for love whilst you enjoy your inner peace
@@SassySlater I’m so happy to hear you have found the right person but incredibly sorry you were with that wrong person and they treated you that way. So glad to hear you’re on the other side 🥰🫂✨
yeah that’s the norm for straight women, but as you can see…single women are in denial that it’s very unique and “wouldn’t ever happen to me” with the right guy lol…studies say otherwise but oh well, I guess most people learn only by experiencing. 😅 *Not saying perfect anomalous partners don’t exist, but they’re not the norm.
Wow, this could have been written by me. I don't really envy my friends for their individual partners (also because I feel that many of them settled for less than average guys) but for the comfort and security of having someone by your side through thick and thin. But I'm sure eventually someone wonderful will come along for both you and me :)
I'm happy being single, but do wish that family and friends would reach in instead of me reaching out. I don't work due to sickness, so I have a lot of free time to be alone in, and it makes maintaining a home even more difficult. I wish there was more of a community where everyone was included and thought about, and checked in on.
@@Aroha016yeah so agreeable, I think COVID was the catalyst that sparked that huge boom over three years ago, we’ve gotta start convincing people to reach out more and feel safer 😢 and another thing was that I literally try to make friends every day at my new college but it feels as if nobody cares about meeting new people, I see so many people on their phones and I don’t want that, the only reason I’m on my phone all the time is because it feels as if I’m the only one who likes having conversation, and what’s worse is that I tried staring conversation with some other freshman at lunch and they kindly told me to leave. At least they were polite, but i really wish people were more open to meeting new people. Hopefully society comes around one day. -College freshman diagnosed with autism
@@redleader4876 my son is autistic and he is the most interesting person I know Just keep being fabulous and stay real. They told you to leave because they are afraid All the best for your future Go well
I’ve been thinking about this just have a lot on my plate right now. But I’m actively trying to find a way to go about this in a way that feels organic to me. How it would work exactly, structure… I hope it makes it out into the world ✨
well said. I'm in my mid 60s & was on my own for over a decade. I just lived my life, did the things I enjoyed & I met someone. like you say, do you & someone that may be in the same place as you will show up. good luck. chin up..
It’s so heart warming hearing that from someone else, it can feel so isolating thinking that I’m the only one feeling that way, especially being the only single person in my circle. In my early twenties, I never thought it can be that painful to live this reality everyday didn’t even think it would bother me, now that I’m in my mid twenties it almost feels suffocating. I truly hope you find what you’re looking for, the whole that would make space for you ❤
I live in a town where there is a not written rule about not talking to anyone around. If you are at a class, or a market, or an event you don't approach anyone, you just do your thing and go home, no talking needed. It comes to the point that if a person is being friendly, he is most definetly an outsider. So my whole life I worked really hard to deal with my emocions alone or with my therapist. It is really hard to not feel like an inconvenience when you feel like everyone around you wants to solve everything alone.
Thank you for sharing this. That sounds really tough, especially when it feels like there’s a pressure to handle everything on your own. I can relate to that feeling of isolation at times, and I’m glad you’ve had support from your therapist. You’re definitely not an inconvenience, and it’s important to know that we don’t have to do everything alone. I hope you continue to find the space to connect with people who understand.🫂✨
Thank you! That balance between self-reliance and staying connected is something I’m always thinking about. It’s great to be independent, but it’s also important to stay open to meaningful connections with others.✨
I completely resonate with this. Your thoughts are my thoughts. In fact before I started watching this I was drawing a picture of my self in a field of eyes all looking the other way from me. Sometimes as an older woman you feel invisible and like your experience, wisdom and maturity mean nothing to anyone. You're right, it's not sad, it just is. By the way your shots of London are breathtaking x
Thank you for sharing this, and I’m so glad it resonated with you. And thank you for your kind words about the shots of London! That really means a lot. 🥰✨
Wow, you spoke right to my heart in this beautiful reflective, video. I'm sure your strong yet vulnerable story speaks to many of us single, independent people who have carved meaningful lives on our own but still have a dream in our heart to share our lives with another without shrinking who are or living our truth fully. Thank you for sharing.
The story of my life. I've always been the flower in the garden that the bees never buzz around. Men have liked me, but never romantically. 🙁 Every time I attend a big function at work, I am always THE only woman who doesn't have either a boyfriend or husband. Family get togethers are the same, except I am alone; the little kids in the room don't count. Oh, and yes, Grandma is in the corner, too, but she's widowed. She had someone for 50+ years. She doesn't count. I, too, get tired of having to figure everything out by myself, paying every bill myself, comforting myself, facing challenges myself. It's as if the world sees me as something not worth loving. I know that cannot be true. But, there's no man there to prove that. When no one wants you, yeah, you feel less than everyone else. I'm ashamed to say that I occasionally have feelings of smugness when someone divorces or becomes widowed because they immediately go into panic mode with needing to find a spouse asap. My ability to be alone is like my superpower. I can be alone, but they can't. I want to be picked for once. Let someone else be alone for a change.
I really feel this. It can be exhausting navigating life solo, especially when it feels like everyone else has their person. You’re not alone in those moments of frustration. There’s strength in being able to handle life on your own, but I get that longing to be picked too. We deserve someone who sees and chooses us, and I truly believe that possibility is still out there for both of us. ✨🫂❤️
I’m so grateful to have you here and happy that this resonated with you. In whatever stage of life, this subject seems all too common, so all I hope for is that I can help others know they’re not alone in their aloneness ✨❤️
I've been thinking about your beautiful content and storytelling since seeing it on Tiktok recently and I'm so happy I circled back on TH-cam to watch the full length videos. I feel a lot of kinship with your journey, having done a London move too (though I'm back in Canada now). I'm heading back there for a visit next month and your footage has made me more excited, and dreaming of writing in London cafes again soon. 🩷 Looking forward to the next chapter in your story you share!
As a person who is very under confident and needs someone to lean on always, I actually crave for this, it’s better to be alone and have the confidence to do it all than to always search for someone to help you get through your life.
I completely understand where you’re coming from. Building confidence and being able to rely on yourself is such an important journey. I think that’s something we all work toward in different ways. For me, it’s about finding that balance-feeling secure on my own, but also being open to someone who adds to that without being the reason I stand strong.
I used to feel the same way, and in some ways still do even now that I’m in a relationship. I was afraid of dating because I didn’t want to have to sacrifice things that were important to me. But then someone told me “the right person for you won’t take from your life, they will only add” and that hit me like a rock lol and made me more open to meeting people. Hope you’re doing well on your adventures 💗
I felt this exact same way for so long. It is so perfect, so so perfect the way you describe it. My soulmate and I found each other in March, and though it is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me, it was hard adjusting to the change. And I sometimes still find myself longing for, and reminiscing on that old independent streak/routine. Even though we are not codependent, and I longed for a partner, I don't know... you find comfort in counting on yourself.
Thank you! I’m so happy you’ve found your person. I’m sure the transition and adjustment are tough… I know they will be tough for me even with the most perfect person… but is all part of life, changing and growing ✨
Dear it is beautiful to be alone, in awe. We are born as one and we die as one. No matter how many people we gather in life in the end we still need to do it alone, one. So it is a privilege to grow in a self state of mindfulness and beauty. Choose being alone gives room for growth and something far greater beyond what tradition or fairytale dictates. Buddha chose one path, his greatness is an example of the road less taken and perhaps a more enlightening and liberating path. Otherwise we ordinarily follow the crowd and be caught in loss and suffering, no fun. Declutter, detach, free up room to grow. I can say this because I mindfully enjoy and choose to walk alone. There is nothing wrong with it. There is a lot of beauty in it that grows from mindfulness to brave it alone than dragged with crowd culture.
This is beautifully put. There’s definitely something powerful about being able to walk alone and embrace growth through mindfulness. I completely agree that solitude can be a privilege in its own way. For me, it’s about finding that balance-enjoying the growth that comes from being alone but also being open to sharing that journey with someone who complements it. Thank you for sharing this perspective.✨
"Im my own priority".. this is honestly a beautitul thing that some people never experience. I have it now. But im aware that for the first 40+ years of my life, not only was i nobody elses priority, i prioritised a half dozen plus people before myself. The narrative you describe about coupledom that you think would be good, simply doesnt reflect most peoples experience.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s so powerful that you’ve learned to prioritize yourself, especially after so many years of putting others first-that’s no small thing. I totally understand that the idea of partnership can feel different for everyone. For me, it’s about finding someone who respects that sense of self-priority, where you can still be your own person while sharing your life with someone who adds to it. ✨
i love this. i’m 47 and i gave up on finding a partner at least 10 years ago. i have my cat and my few good friends and my job and my little routine of youtubes and movies and music and books, and that’s enough. my sister found her partner four years ago, and that’s good. we still have our parents, but we know they won’t both be around for much longer. after they’re gone, i don’t know if i’ll be for too long after that because there won’t be anyone who needs me (not to get morbid, just being honest). anyway. thank you for this. i wish you luck and joy ❤
Thank you for sharing this. I really appreciate your honesty and the way you’ve built a life that feels fulfilling to you, even if it’s different from what you imagined. I understand those thoughts about the future-it’s something I think about too. But I also believe that joy can come from the connections we already have, and I’m hopeful that life still has more surprises for us both.✨
Absolutely love your video! I think it's such a common problem these days, but vast majority just don't talk openly and honestly about that. I think in fact it's a pandemic of singleness as many people being not officially single feel very alone inside of their so called relationships. I hope and wish that all people who feel along will meet their proper partners soon x
Is this an excerpt from my journal?! It’s exactly how I feel. I feel like a full person and have worked through so much to get to where I am and whilst I am happy, it’s tiring, kind of like driving. Yes I can drive for hours, take a break when I need to and get to where I want to go but it would be so nice for someone to take the wheel sometimes and give me a break. I’m a fellow perpetually single gal and it’s been so long that I feel like it’s part of my identity. I’m so worried that even if the right person comes along, I might not know how to be open. I’m hopeful but it can be a little sad to think about sometimes since it’s something I’m wanting more and more each day. I hope we all find the right person for us ❤️
I love this analogy about driving… my most apparent moments seem to be after making dinner, and then having to do the dishes.i feel you, i think we just have to keep our awareness open, so that the thing we aren’t used to doesn’t pass us by. Sending you a big hug 🫂✨❤️
I've been in long term relationships all my life, adjusting myself to their needs. Now, suddenly, I'm by myself and feeling a bit lost in life. Who am I, and what do I really want? I'm searching for something, but I don't know what. My life feels boring and it's like I'm waiting for a partner, someone interesting to fill the void. But I don't want to make the mistake of letting just anyone in to my life, just because I'm feeling lonely.
I really hear you on this. That feeling of being lost after adjusting to someone else for so long is so real. It’s tough, but also such an opportunity to figure out what you truly want. It’s hard not to feel like you’re waiting for someone to fill that space, but I love that you’re mindful of not letting just anyone in. It’s a slow process, but I believe you’ll find that clarity-and the right person-when the time is right.🫂✨
I’ll definitely work on something. But in the meantime, just know I don’t always feel full. It comes in waves… a lot of my fullness comes from distraction and when that runs out I fall into emptiness. It’s so normal, so just know you’re not alone ✨🫂
No one can know anyone as deeply as one knows oneself. It is always disruptive to have someone, sometimes it is worth it. But if it's not, then it's worth keeping a full life on one's own instead. Keep your foundation.
I get what you’re saying-protecting that foundation is so important. But I believe the right person can add depth to your life rather than disrupt it, and while no one can know you as well as you know yourself, that doesn’t mean they can’t come close. Sometimes, it’s worth the risk of letting someone in. You never know what you might miss.✨
@the.ashfiles Yes, there is much of value to be gained in relationships by being vulnerable with the right people at the right time. At the same time everyone changes over time: It is entirely possible to make good choices, commit to a long-term relationship with someone you know, and who knows you, plan well, do all the "right" things, and one day find yourself alone in a marriage with a person who has betrayed you. I've seen it happen several times now.
@@melb.4609 That’s a really valid point, and I’m sorry you’ve seen that happen. It’s true-things can change no matter how much effort you put in, and that’s a tough reality. I guess for me, it’s about trying to balance the vulnerability with the possibility of something real, even if it doesn’t last forever. But I completely understand how experiences like that can make it hard to trust again.
Oh yes I've been there. I've been single my whole life, and I really resonate with how you feel! For me, I'm so glad I know someone who knows me completely and gave up everything for me, which changes everything. My personal relationship with Jesus means that even if I feel lonely sometimes, I'm comforted knowing I am never truly alone. I'm so happy I'm completed in him, rather than the pressure of needing a partner - whether or not I end up with someone. If you want to meet him and find out who Jesus really is, I'd recommend reading the story for yourself - the Gospel of Luke in the Bible is good place to start, or find a Bible-believing church near you. He is the only one who can satisfy all our longings - to be known and loved. 🥰🙌
excellent video but why nobody complain about how low the volume of this video?? I'm sure my speaker is fine cuz I clicked other video, it's loud. I had to turn on cc cuz can't hear sh*t 💀 but the content is damn good!
I hear you, and I completely understand why peace is so important after going through something difficult. I’m so sorry you went through that. I think there’s a lot of value in both solitude and connection-it’s all about finding what brings you joy and balance in life, and fulfilling your needs in whatever season of life you’re in. 🫂✨
Comparison is the thief of joy. It’s important to separate our inner feelings and comparison. Would you feel this way if you were surrounded by single people?
@@SassySlater I would still feel this way for sure. As much as I talk about others this feeling is very much my own… even if we took comparison out, and if I were surrounded by single people ✨
I cannot thank you enough for so simplistically yet thoroughly and powerfully capturing the essence of my inner monologue. I had no idea how much I needed to be seen, heard and truly truly understood. My soul genuinely needed this, as well as the beautiful images of one of my favorite cities I’ve ever been to. 🙏🏼🫂🩵🇬🇧
![it’s not too late to start over… [moving to London.]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/4KdyMDja9Uw/mqdefault.jpg)
![it’s not too late to start over… [moving to London.]](/img/tr.png)
“I’ve been my own anchor for so long” this touched me deeply. This is how I feel everyday.
Sending you a big hug 🫂 I know how hard and tiring it is ✨
I totally get where you're coming from. As an over 50 woman starting again, I came to realise that we all fall for society's ideal of a partner and 2.4 kids. But in reality, it's not always the case. Life experiences has taught me that we need to be whole in ourself and like you say, someone who comes along needs to complement our wholeness, not complete us.
@@SoulCareOver50 exactly 🥰✨
I just wanted to express my appreciation for the delivery. Your vocal pacing is calm, not under or overly emotional, not floating in contemplation or sitting in sorrow. The concept resonates with so many of us, and it was beautifully told, too.
Thank you so much 🥹 I never wanted it to come across as ‘poor me’ - because that isn’t where I’m coming from. It’s just the facts of where I’m at in my life. It’s no sad (certainly not happy) but it’s just life right now ✨
If you had a partner you would not only be carrying your own emotional weight, you would also be carrying theirs. Trust me on this.
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I definitely get that relationships come with their own challenges, but I still think there’s something meaningful in having someone to share the load with. It’s not about perfection, just hoping for the right balance when the time comes. ✨
@@the.ashfileswhen I was with the wrong person, I carried their weight and it was at times suffocating.
No I am with the right person for me…. It’s like being in immense peace, warmth and comfort.
After suffering severe violence with the wrong person, I longed for the peace of solitude and inner peace. But along came the right person, so share this inner peace with.
Keep an eye open for love whilst you enjoy your inner peace
@@SassySlater I’m so happy to hear you have found the right person but incredibly sorry you were with that wrong person and they treated you that way. So glad to hear you’re on the other side 🥰🫂✨
yeah that’s the norm for straight women, but as you can see…single women are in denial that it’s very unique and “wouldn’t ever happen to me” with the right guy lol…studies say otherwise but oh well, I guess most people learn only by experiencing. 😅
*Not saying perfect anomalous partners don’t exist, but they’re not the norm.
Wow, this could have been written by me. I don't really envy my friends for their individual partners (also because I feel that many of them settled for less than average guys) but for the comfort and security of having someone by your side through thick and thin. But I'm sure eventually someone wonderful will come along for both you and me :)
It will happen! And I get that feeling about settling. Which is exactly what we are NOT doing ✨🥰
This sounds like my inner monologue. It was wonderful to see London so beautifully shot too. X
Thank you so much! So glad the piece resonated with you ✨🥰
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ All my support!!!! Thanks for sharing this treasure ❤
Thank you 🥰✨
It like someone took the thoughts out my head and spoke them out loud 🥺
I'm so glad it resonated with you ✨
something i can contemplate 💖 thank you for your beatiful words.
Thank you so much 🥰✨🫂
I'm happy being single, but do wish that family and friends would reach in instead of me reaching out.
I don't work due to sickness, so I have a lot of free time to be alone in, and it makes maintaining a home even more difficult.
I wish there was more of a community where everyone was included and thought about, and checked in on.
I’m so sorry to hear that, that must be so tough given your situation. Sending you a big hug 🫂✨
@@the.ashfiles Thank you 🩷🫂
Good comment. Communities aren't what they used to be. People seem to hide in their houses and don't seem to care anymore about their neighbors 😢
@@Aroha016yeah so agreeable, I think COVID was the catalyst that sparked that huge boom over three years ago, we’ve gotta start convincing people to reach out more and feel safer 😢 and another thing was that I literally try to make friends every day at my new college but it feels as if nobody cares about meeting new people, I see so many people on their phones and I don’t want that, the only reason I’m on my phone all the time is because it feels as if I’m the only one who likes having conversation, and what’s worse is that I tried staring conversation with some other freshman at lunch and they kindly told me to leave. At least they were polite, but i really wish people were more open to meeting new people. Hopefully society comes around one day.
-College freshman diagnosed with autism
@@redleader4876 my son is autistic and he is the most interesting person I know
Just keep being fabulous and stay real. They told you to leave because they are afraid
All the best for your future
Go well
“Carrying the weight alone” is so real. I feel that. ❤
Sending you a big hug! ✨❤️
I wish you could also make a podcast for this. Its nice hearing your voice like a monologue when going out alone. Its comforting.
I’ve been thinking about this just have a lot on my plate right now. But I’m actively trying to find a way to go about this in a way that feels organic to me. How it would work exactly, structure… I hope it makes it out into the world ✨
well said. I'm in my mid 60s & was on my own for over a decade. I just lived my life, did the things I enjoyed & I met someone. like you say, do you & someone that may be in the same place as you will show up. good luck. chin up..
Exactly! Whatever (or whoever) is meant for me will find me ✨
I turned 33 today and I just discovered your channel and its comforting to know someone out there is feeling what I am feeling.
Thank you for this❤
So happy to have you here and glad this piece resonated with you. You’re not alone in your aloneness. Happy Birthday! ✨🥳
It’s so heart warming hearing that from someone else, it can feel so isolating thinking that I’m the only one feeling that way, especially being the only single person in my circle. In my early twenties, I never thought it can be that painful to live this reality everyday didn’t even think it would bother me, now that I’m in my mid twenties it almost feels suffocating. I truly hope you find what you’re looking for, the whole that would make space for you ❤
Thank you so much Sarah, I’m so glad the piece resonated with you and I hope the same for you ✨❤️
so well written and a little too relatable, bravo
Thank you! 🥰 glad you resonated with it, hope you feel a little less alone in your feelings ✨
Exquisite. Being in love with love, of sense, of self. The exploration and adventure, in questioning and resolution. A proud dreamer. :)
Thank you so much! I really appreciate it 🥰
42 and feeling this so much. I have a good life but I am tired as well.
Sending you a big hug 🫂✨❤️
Love this! Keep going!
Thank you for perfectly articulating the thoughts in my head. I feel the exact same way.
I’m so glad it resonated with you ✨🫂
I live in a town where there is a not written rule about not talking to anyone around. If you are at a class, or a market, or an event you don't approach anyone, you just do your thing and go home, no talking needed. It comes to the point that if a person is being friendly, he is most definetly an outsider.
So my whole life I worked really hard to deal with my emocions alone or with my therapist. It is really hard to not feel like an inconvenience when you feel like everyone around you wants to solve everything alone.
Thank you for sharing this. That sounds really tough, especially when it feels like there’s a pressure to handle everything on your own. I can relate to that feeling of isolation at times, and I’m glad you’ve had support from your therapist. You’re definitely not an inconvenience, and it’s important to know that we don’t have to do everything alone. I hope you continue to find the space to connect with people who understand.🫂✨
While it's great to find independence, the video also highlights the balance between self-reliance and staying connected with others
Thank you! That balance between self-reliance and staying connected is something I’m always thinking about. It’s great to be independent, but it’s also important to stay open to meaningful connections with others.✨
I completely resonate with this. Your thoughts are my thoughts. In fact before I started watching this I was drawing a picture of my self in a field of eyes all looking the other way from me. Sometimes as an older woman you feel invisible and like your experience, wisdom and maturity mean nothing to anyone. You're right, it's not sad, it just is. By the way your shots of London are breathtaking x
Thank you for sharing this, and I’m so glad it resonated with you. And thank you for your kind words about the shots of London! That really means a lot. 🥰✨
Wow, you spoke right to my heart in this beautiful reflective, video. I'm sure your strong yet vulnerable story speaks to many of us single, independent people who have carved meaningful lives on our own but still have a dream in our heart to share our lives with another without shrinking who are or living our truth fully. Thank you for sharing.
What a beautiful and kind comment. That’s why I write, in hopes that maybe it resonates with even one person. I appreciate you being here 🥰✨
❤"The quiet spaces in between"
"Building my life not as a waiting room"😮
Thank you 🥰✨
The story of my life. I've always been the flower in the garden that the bees never buzz around. Men have liked me, but never romantically. 🙁 Every time I attend a big function at work, I am always THE only woman who doesn't have either a boyfriend or husband.
Family get togethers are the same, except I am alone; the little kids in the room don't count. Oh, and yes, Grandma is in the corner, too, but she's widowed. She had someone for 50+ years. She doesn't count.
I, too, get tired of having to figure everything out by myself, paying every bill myself, comforting myself, facing challenges myself.
It's as if the world sees me as something not worth loving. I know that cannot be true. But, there's no man there to prove that.
When no one wants you, yeah, you feel less than everyone else.
I'm ashamed to say that I occasionally have feelings of smugness when someone divorces or becomes widowed because they immediately go into panic mode with needing to find a spouse asap.
My ability to be alone is like my superpower.
I can be alone, but they can't.
I want to be picked for once. Let someone else be alone for a change.
I really feel this. It can be exhausting navigating life solo, especially when it feels like everyone else has their person. You’re not alone in those moments of frustration. There’s strength in being able to handle life on your own, but I get that longing to be picked too. We deserve someone who sees and chooses us, and I truly believe that possibility is still out there for both of us. ✨🫂❤️
I feel the same about my life right now. This video brings me great comfort, knowing I'm not the only one alone :)
So glad it resonated with you, you’re not alone in your aloneness friend ✨❤️
Beautifully done🥹 Im still in my early 20’s and already feel this way. But stumbling upon your videos had made me feel less alone Thank you💕✨
I’m so grateful to have you here and happy that this resonated with you. In whatever stage of life, this subject seems all too common, so all I hope for is that I can help others know they’re not alone in their aloneness ✨❤️
I've been thinking about your beautiful content and storytelling since seeing it on Tiktok recently and I'm so happy I circled back on TH-cam to watch the full length videos. I feel a lot of kinship with your journey, having done a London move too (though I'm back in Canada now). I'm heading back there for a visit next month and your footage has made me more excited, and dreaming of writing in London cafes again soon. 🩷 Looking forward to the next chapter in your story you share!
Thank you so much for such a kind message, I’m so glad my story resonated with you in some way and so grateful to have you along for the journey 🥰✨
As a person who is very under confident and needs someone to lean on always, I actually crave for this, it’s better to be alone and have the confidence to do it all than to always search for someone to help you get through your life.
I completely understand where you’re coming from. Building confidence and being able to rely on yourself is such an important journey. I think that’s something we all work toward in different ways. For me, it’s about finding that balance-feeling secure on my own, but also being open to someone who adds to that without being the reason I stand strong.
I used to feel the same way, and in some ways still do even now that I’m in a relationship. I was afraid of dating because I didn’t want to have to sacrifice things that were important to me. But then someone told me “the right person for you won’t take from your life, they will only add” and that hit me like a rock lol and made me more open to meeting people. Hope you’re doing well on your adventures 💗
Thank you! And I agree with that ✨🥰
I felt this exact same way for so long. It is so perfect, so so perfect the way you describe it. My soulmate and I found each other in March, and though it is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me, it was hard adjusting to the change. And I sometimes still find myself longing for, and reminiscing on that old independent streak/routine. Even though we are not codependent, and I longed for a partner, I don't know... you find comfort in counting on yourself.
Thank you! I’m so happy you’ve found your person. I’m sure the transition and adjustment are tough… I know they will be tough for me even with the most perfect person… but is all part of life, changing and growing ✨
I'm aromantic, and I feel this so very deeply...
✨🥹❤️
Found you on TT! I’m going through this exact thing right now. Grateful to have found you!
So grateful to have you here 🫂✨🥰
This is one of the best videos on TH-cam ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Oh wow! Thank you so much 🥹✨🙏🏻
Dear it is beautiful to be alone, in awe. We are born as one and we die as one. No matter how many people we gather in life in the end we still need to do it alone, one. So it is a privilege to grow in a self state of mindfulness and beauty. Choose being alone gives room for growth and something far greater beyond what tradition or fairytale dictates. Buddha chose one path, his greatness is an example of the road less taken and perhaps a more enlightening and liberating path. Otherwise we ordinarily follow the crowd and be caught in loss and suffering, no fun. Declutter, detach, free up room to grow. I can say this because I mindfully enjoy and choose to walk alone. There is nothing wrong with it. There is a lot of beauty in it that grows from mindfulness to brave it alone than dragged with crowd culture.
This is beautifully put. There’s definitely something powerful about being able to walk alone and embrace growth through mindfulness. I completely agree that solitude can be a privilege in its own way. For me, it’s about finding that balance-enjoying the growth that comes from being alone but also being open to sharing that journey with someone who complements it. Thank you for sharing this perspective.✨
@@the.ashfiles Thanks so much for sharing dear you are beautiful!
"Im my own priority".. this is honestly a beautitul thing that some people never experience. I have it now. But im aware that for the first 40+ years of my life, not only was i nobody elses priority, i prioritised a half dozen plus people before myself. The narrative you describe about coupledom that you think would be good, simply doesnt reflect most peoples experience.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s so powerful that you’ve learned to prioritize yourself, especially after so many years of putting others first-that’s no small thing. I totally understand that the idea of partnership can feel different for everyone. For me, it’s about finding someone who respects that sense of self-priority, where you can still be your own person while sharing your life with someone who adds to it. ✨
i love this. i’m 47 and i gave up on finding a partner at least 10 years ago. i have my cat and my few good friends and my job and my little routine of youtubes and movies and music and books, and that’s enough. my sister found her partner four years ago, and that’s good. we still have our parents, but we know they won’t both be around for much longer. after they’re gone, i don’t know if i’ll be for too long after that because there won’t be anyone who needs me (not to get morbid, just being honest). anyway. thank you for this. i wish you luck and joy ❤
Thank you for sharing this. I really appreciate your honesty and the way you’ve built a life that feels fulfilling to you, even if it’s different from what you imagined. I understand those thoughts about the future-it’s something I think about too. But I also believe that joy can come from the connections we already have, and I’m hopeful that life still has more surprises for us both.✨
Good, true and classy video. Have a great day! From Canada 🇨🇦
Thank you! Sincerely, a fellow Canadian ✨🇨🇦
This is so beautiful! It makes me long for London and described my life there in my 20s perfectly. ♥️♥️♥️
I love that it resonated with you in some way 🥰✨
This is beautiful ❤
Thank you so much 🥹✨
Absolutely love your video! I think it's such a common problem these days, but vast majority just don't talk openly and honestly about that. I think in fact it's a pandemic of singleness as many people being not officially single feel very alone inside of their so called relationships.
I hope and wish that all people who feel along will meet their proper partners soon x
I couldn’t agree more! Thanks for sharing? Happy to have you here ✨🥰
@@the.ashfiles sending you love x
@@ValeHow-de5ts back at you ✨❤️
@@the.ashfiles ❤️
I am so glad I found your channel. ❤❤
I’m so grateful to have you here 🥰✨
Thank you Ash
Thank you for being here 🥰✨
This. SO. MUCH. THIS.
Thank you so much! ☺️✨🫂
Is this an excerpt from my journal?! It’s exactly how I feel. I feel like a full person and have worked through so much to get to where I am and whilst I am happy, it’s tiring, kind of like driving. Yes I can drive for hours, take a break when I need to and get to where I want to go but it would be so nice for someone to take the wheel sometimes and give me a break. I’m a fellow perpetually single gal and it’s been so long that I feel like it’s part of my identity. I’m so worried that even if the right person comes along, I might not know how to be open. I’m hopeful but it can be a little sad to think about sometimes since it’s something I’m wanting more and more each day. I hope we all find the right person for us ❤️
I love this analogy about driving… my most apparent moments seem to be after making dinner, and then having to do the dishes.i feel you, i think we just have to keep our awareness open, so that the thing we aren’t used to doesn’t pass us by. Sending you a big hug 🫂✨❤️
I've been in long term relationships all my life, adjusting myself to their needs. Now, suddenly, I'm by myself and feeling a bit lost in life.
Who am I, and what do I really want?
I'm searching for something, but I don't know what. My life feels boring and it's like I'm waiting for a partner, someone interesting to fill the void. But I don't want to make the mistake of letting just anyone in to my life, just because I'm feeling lonely.
I really hear you on this. That feeling of being lost after adjusting to someone else for so long is so real. It’s tough, but also such an opportunity to figure out what you truly want. It’s hard not to feel like you’re waiting for someone to fill that space, but I love that you’re mindful of not letting just anyone in. It’s a slow process, but I believe you’ll find that clarity-and the right person-when the time is right.🫂✨
I would love to hear you talk about feeling whole and building a life for yourself...I struggle with that. I just feel empty
I’ll definitely work on something. But in the meantime, just know I don’t always feel full. It comes in waves… a lot of my fullness comes from distraction and when that runs out I fall into emptiness. It’s so normal, so just know you’re not alone ✨🫂
No one can know anyone as deeply as one knows oneself. It is always disruptive to have someone, sometimes it is worth it. But if it's not, then it's worth keeping a full life on one's own instead. Keep your foundation.
I get what you’re saying-protecting that foundation is so important. But I believe the right person can add depth to your life rather than disrupt it, and while no one can know you as well as you know yourself, that doesn’t mean they can’t come close. Sometimes, it’s worth the risk of letting someone in. You never know what you might miss.✨
@the.ashfiles Yes, there is much of value to be gained in relationships by being vulnerable with the right people at the right time. At the same time everyone changes over time: It is entirely possible to make good choices, commit to a long-term relationship with someone you know, and who knows you, plan well, do all the "right" things, and one day find yourself alone in a marriage with a person who has betrayed you. I've seen it happen several times now.
@@melb.4609 That’s a really valid point, and I’m sorry you’ve seen that happen. It’s true-things can change no matter how much effort you put in, and that’s a tough reality. I guess for me, it’s about trying to balance the vulnerability with the possibility of something real, even if it doesn’t last forever. But I completely understand how experiences like that can make it hard to trust again.
@@the.ashfiles It is all real, my friend.
Beautifully written, so relatable ❤
Thank you so much! 🥰✨
Oh yes I've been there. I've been single my whole life, and I really resonate with how you feel!
For me, I'm so glad I know someone who knows me completely and gave up everything for me, which changes everything. My personal relationship with Jesus means that even if I feel lonely sometimes, I'm comforted knowing I am never truly alone. I'm so happy I'm completed in him, rather than the pressure of needing a partner - whether or not I end up with someone. If you want to meet him and find out who Jesus really is, I'd recommend reading the story for yourself - the Gospel of Luke in the Bible is good place to start, or find a Bible-believing church near you. He is the only one who can satisfy all our longings - to be known and loved. 🥰🙌
So glad you found that ✨🥰
excellent video but why nobody complain about how low the volume of this video?? I'm sure my speaker is fine cuz I clicked other video, it's loud. I had to turn on cc cuz can't hear sh*t 💀 but the content is damn good!
Thank you… strange about the audio. No issues on my end, but appreciate the feedback ✨
As someone who has been trapped in a bad relationship, I can say I prefer the peace of solitary life.
I hear you, and I completely understand why peace is so important after going through something difficult. I’m so sorry you went through that. I think there’s a lot of value in both solitude and connection-it’s all about finding what brings you joy and balance in life, and fulfilling your needs in whatever season of life you’re in. 🫂✨
👏💥 you're so creative!
Thank you so much! 🥰✨
Nice video. Best wishes from Serbia/Europe
Thank you so much! ✨
Comparison is the thief of joy.
It’s important to separate our inner feelings and comparison. Would you feel this way if you were surrounded by single people?
@@SassySlater I would still feel this way for sure. As much as I talk about others this feeling is very much my own… even if we took comparison out, and if I were surrounded by single people ✨
Wow. That question of is your life so whole and so full on it’s own, is there room for another person to fit into the life we have crafted?
It’s a hard one to wrap my head around… I ask myself every day ✨
I cannot thank you enough for so simplistically yet thoroughly and powerfully capturing the essence of my inner monologue. I had no idea how much I needed to be seen, heard and truly truly understood. My soul genuinely needed this, as well as the beautiful images of one of my favorite cities I’ve ever been to. 🙏🏼🫂🩵🇬🇧
Thank you so so much! I’m so glad this piece resonated with you in the way that it did. 🫂✨