How Similar Are ENFJ And INFP? | Relationship Advice
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ส.ค. 2024
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If you’re new to Geek Psychology, my name is Matt Sherman. People call me Sherman. I'm a personality type expert, life coach, hypnotist, author, podcaster, and course creator. I help mainly INFPs embrace their unique strengths and navigate life's challenges. Through practical strategies and deep insights, I aim to help people like you live a more fulfilling and authentic live where you can wake up and feel good about who you are and your impact on the world. Are you an INFP wondering about how far dating an ENFJ is gonna take you outside of your comfort zone? Or are you an ENFJ trying to figure out an INFP?
In this episode, you're going to learn some of the main similarities and differences of ENFJs and INFPs - from my own experience as an INFP married to an ENFJ ;)
Personality type can be a wonderful tool to improve both friendship and couple relationship interaction dynamics. The chemistry that creates conflict intrapersonally is made even more difficult to deal with when you add interpersonal relationships / dynamics - like someone from a different personality type (intp, infj, etc) and stakes or LOVE!
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Disclaimer: These are my opinions. If you have a serious issue, go see a doctor. I'm sharing these because I have a lot of experience and I want to do my best to help where I can and make an impact in the best way that I can.
INFPs want to help the world, as well, but they learn that people don't listen, grow, learn or care.
Therefore, they share their insights with people who will listen and disregard the rest.
100% agree with Matt. My ex bf and I were a "golden pair" INFP(him)/ENFJ(moi). He's a therapist, so I thought I found someone who together we could build a healthy relationship. He wasn’t ready for that. But I'm incredibly grateful for how the relationship revealed the inner work I needed to do. I've devoted years to becoming the healthiest version of myself (which I'm really proud of). 😀 Someday I hope I'll meet another cute INFP who values creating a relationship that makes each other (and the world) a little better. But until then, I keep fostering that growth, light, and love within myself. ❤️
The timing on this lol I’m an INFP and just found out yesterday that my bf is an ENFJ! And only because one of his professors asked his class to take the MBTI, with this in mind, our relationship makes so much sense now
Cool ^^
Now you can understand even more about each other.
I am also an infp and my one is an enfj
Love this, I'm an ENFJ, I'd be really interested on an in depth video on best way to communicate/interact and hold compassion for one another when really stressed. I have family friends and past partners that are INFP and when they got stressed and cold, i go into logic mode and read into it too much. I learn to just give them a lot of space but it doesn't work to give months or years of space in partnership :/
Yes because too much space seems to flare up our hidden anxiety/fear of abandonment.
@@cathygeo4473 but also months or years of space isn't a relationship is it? My INFP ex-bf has been ghosting me for almost a year now, and never even had a conversation before he disappeared. If you aren't relating to each other then what is it? Because it definitely isn't a relationship
I also find the male INFP to be very interesting...I used to be too judgmental as an ENFJ when criticizing introverts but Im so glad I learned how wrong that was and how awesome male and female INFP's can be.
Yes! INFP. I too feel that my emotions are mine to sort out. AKA " thank you for 'being there' for me... please keep doing it over THERE". :)
I'm a male INFP oversharer but the way to mitigate that is for me to do my own growth work.
Then instead, of talking about my problems, I'm sharing the solutions I achieved; it's a night and day difference.
This does resonate with me, even though I'm in a relationship with an INFJ, not ENFJ.
Especially the: help the world vs help the individuals has come up a lot in our discussions about how we approach the world.
Similarly, I notice she stays more and longer on topic, exploring one idea, while I'm pushing (gently) to see connections, being diachronically inspired by idea's. :p
ENFJ-A, Infp-t left me 2 days ago. We never argue. The moment I mentioned he hurt my feelings from not fussing over me for my birthday... not even a card. He basically blocked me for 24 hours and then broke up with me. I can't make sense of it. He took it as an attack, when it was me voicing me being hurt. He vowed a future with me... I feel blindsided by this.
I’ve always had a difficulty with giving cards and presents and remembering special occasions. Hopefully he learns to find the value in upholding those.
Could also be a protective mechanism to allow him to not experience the fact that he hurt someone close to him.
Could be offended that his intentions weren’t seen as good in some way.
Many potential reasons for why it happened. The only way to know for sure is to have that conversation.
@@GeekPsychology Thank you for the insight! The problem is he didn't want to have the conversation and has totally tuned me out. Due to blocking me on my birthday, it escalated more than it needed to. He could of just said can we resume this later, as that escalated the hurt to an extreme level and i assumed by blocking me that he had broken up with me on my birthday. I can't have my heart messed around like this. If he can't communicate and come to an understanding that it was a silly misunderstanding.. that it wasnt attack on who he is. That we need to be respectful and understanding to each others preferences/feelings and no react so hastily. Then there is no hope 😕. I love him, but life is difficult misunderstandings and arguements happen 🤷♀️. You don't just break up when someone expresses a negative emotion to you. As I like harmony myself, I don't usually bring something up unless I am hurt. I guess it's a lesson learnt, that constant bliss and no disagreements isn't a thing. It's either being avoided or its a healthy expression of feelings. He promised me a future and everything, I guess it was all words.
@@as-zu8pw hey, umm I am also an infp so do your bf but...first thing I want to tell you is please stop overthinking about it and forgive him because we infp "s we never have the intentions to hurt what he didi is called the isolation which we infp"s do very often he might be working on his projects or might have something else to do ,I understand it's rude to you but let me tell you he loves you he don't show you but he do....don't hate on him he is a good person cause I am an infp and I can feel him ...I hope you both dont Breakup
I'm an infp and couldn't imagine not celebrating the birthday of someone I love. I see no excuse for this just selfishness.
Sounds like he might have Borderline Personality Disorder
Ah wow...my wife is an ENFJ as well dude...I'm a INFP...nice timing...I'll get her to watch this with me when shes free...I'm glad you said when we don't say how we feel or we do alot cause she notices I can exploded with insights or I'm fairly reserved and doing something else...btw Ironsworn solo rpg is aaaawsome, if you haven't heard of...oh ya and at @ 6:40 mark...yep exactly I don't want to deal with all these others to sort myself out...same bro.
Great!
And yes, Ironsworn is great. The MBTI superhero tabletop game I’m making is based off Ironsworn :)
Interesting how everyone is talking about perfect timing!. I was searching for videos of infp vs enfj personalities just today and I wasn't finding any, then a few hours later this pops up and it is a lovely explanation of the functions. Its a perfect video to share with someone who is still being introduced to the idea of cognitive functions :) Thank you Matt! #fellowinfp
Nice timing!
Yes, I try to make the concepts as simple but effective as possible. Ne gets in the way of that though!
How many times can you like a video? 1 is just not enough
lol. Thanks. What was helpful?
Your voice is so soothing!!
Thanks
I'm so glad you did a video on this it's been extremely helpful. I just had the realization today that my most recent ex-girlfriend is an ENFJ and the woman I'm talking to now is also an ENFJ. Oh those ENFJs 😂 this has been really helpful though, I'm about to watch the video linked at the end!
lol. Are they finding you or are you finding them?!
@Matt Sherman - Geek Psychology a little bit of both I guess? Unfortunately we live in a world where online dating the norm so it was simply a swipe right for me and I got lucky enough to get the match 😅 interestingly enough my ex girlfriend reached out to me first as where the woman I'm talking to now I reached out to her first. I hate online dating 😅
I never experienced it. Though I met some people from online, it was quite different.
@Matt Sherman - Geek Psychology count yourself lucky! It's depressing, honestly. It's extremely superficial. Everybody wants attention but nobody wants to put in the effort to actually get to know someone and engage with them. I very rarely ever message a match first. I'm usually the one who gets messaged first and even then the conversations are so dull and boring. It's always small talk with 1-2 sentence replies even when I am actively asking questions trying to get to know the person. More often than not I just eventually stop replying because it's so mundane. I'd MUCH rather meet someone in person and if we vibe to go from there. However, as you know as in introverted INFP it's hard to put myself out there but it's definitely something I'm working on 😅 I have considered many times just deleting all of my dating socials because its just pointless but it's something to do, you know? I don't expect to get anything out of it but it keeps my mind busy when I'm bored.
He’s INFP, I admit at first I don’t understand him, like for me asking for a space means breakup or did I do anything wrong or say anything as ENFJ I have tendency to blame myself if the relationship doesn’t work, or think 🤔 what my other half feelings, I’m quite sensitive I admit but I understand him hahaha maybe that’s what love can do 💕
Omg ,I’m ENFJ and dating INFP this also happened to me 😂
Same, happened to me too. I asked for space and he disappeared for 11 months and counting. I'm now dating an ENFJ. Glad to have someone who cares about my feelings and can actually communicate as a team
I had 2 super significant relationships.
They were my first 2 relationships.
First was an "ESTP-like" super achiever woman who I was super attracted to and loved.
In a fit of unconscious awareness, I rejected her T coldness because it reminded me of my mother.
It all happened super quick and I didn't remember it 1 minute later but my body did and the slow dissolution of that rel was a nightmare.
The second was a loving F and we just had the absolute best time.
She was my favorite person ever.
I wasn't attracted to her in the beginning but was tempted by an accidental elbow brush of her chest.
This was also a nightmare because now matter how much I liked her, the attraction never changed.
I had A LOT of stuff to work through and now that I'm done, I'm fine with being alone.
Honestly, I don't know how relationships work.
The second GF might not have even been an intuitive, she was just so supportive and into me that I was smitten.
I guess you just gotta work through your stuff and if it happens, it happens.
My daughter’s Dad is ENFJ and he’s said to me in the past that I don’t tell the truth. He simply meant that I don’t divulge extra information, not that I lie. I speak to him like anyone else and tell the whole truth, he’s just mad he’s outside the circle now. Sorry not sorry. Sincerely an INFP
Would love to see you do celeb typing videos.
Interesting, even though I have no stake in it lol. It's always neat to learn these things. Though I am curious, INFP/ENFJ is supposed to be one of the Golden pairs. Would you say your relationship resembles that?
Also are you planning to do any others like this? Maybe ISFP/ESFJ? Or perhaps INFJ/ENFP?
I think any pairing also needs to be deal with emotional intelligence and environmental pulls.
That being said, I’ve learned a lot and my wife has too from the pairing itself.
I could. It’ll be a lot more theory-crafting though.
Love the Mjolnir and Infinity Gauntlet.
Everyone asks who I'd be, if I could be a Super Hero....
The Beyonder...that's who I'd be.
#OriginalSecretWars
If you put the white blade in the middle it won't blend into the background so much
EDIT: Now I see why you did it that way.
The black on the top and the white on the bottom (extremes), with the blood in the middle.
A decade ago my test returned an ENFJ result, then I did another test a few months back and that result was INFP. Do we change or does your mood when taking the test affect the results?
You are unlkely to change type, mood is saliently steady when taking the test. The two types are incredibly symbiotic but very different in terms of function.
im enfj years ago when i took the test but recently took the test and find out i was infp. currently i possess both enfj and infp qualities and it's confusing for other people 😂 some might be confused how can i be an e to an i when i still have the same personality (cause some people retook the test when they are older and it changes for some as they grow) but the thing is my e/i are usually in the 50+% vs 40+% range, so that's why it's possible 😂
hey matt, what function causes an emotional response from a memory. i’ve been trying to quit smoking recently, and asked my grandmother how she did it. she told a story of how she attached it to the times that she went threw, and how it was around when her dad passed, which caused her to burst into tears, and i sort of just kinda watched i an almost detached way. i mean i get embarrassed or almost like a “escape my own skin” feeling when i remover something like that but i have a hard time associating my own emotions with a memory like that
In case you might still see it - usually that refers to introverted sensing (Si)
Wow there is so much to learn. 😮 I wonder if any INFP finds themselves magnetic. Interesting. What is the most sexy thing for an INFP?! 🫠🤭💗
ENFJs are the most sexy things for an INFP 😉