When The Narcissist Is Your Neighbor
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 23 ต.ค. 2016
- When the narcissist is your neighbor: "I have a question about going no contact with my narcissistic neighbor. I went on 3 dates with him, and on the 2nd date I had a icky feeling in my gut about this guy. But I went on a 3rd date because maybe it was just my PTSD talking about my narcissist ex-husband. But after the 3rd date the icky feeling grew stronger and I decided to trust my gut feeling. What do you think is the best way to go no contact with a next door neighbor? I have not told him that I don't want to be friends anymore because I didn't want to cause a narsistic injury because I am afraid of how he'll react. So all I'm doing is taking all day to respond back to his texts with just one word replys. I am not answering the phone when he calls. I'm not answering the front door when he knocks. I have been doing this for almost 2 months now. And he keeps contacting me, everyday, like I'm his bestfriend, like I talk to him, and I don't for almost 2 months. It's really creepy! I want to tell him so badly to stop, but I'm afraid because I don't really know him and how he'll react and he lives right next door to me."
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NOTE: Meredith Miller is not a therapist or counselor. She is a holistic integration coach, helping you to self-heal and transform your life after narcissistic abuse and toxic relationships. Meredith teaches the mindsets and tactical skills to help with recovery. She works with a mind-body-spirit approach to wellness that is a valuable complement to traditional psychotherapy. Meredith recommends that you also seek out a licensed therapist who has experience with narcissistic abuse and relational trauma in order to help you with the complex-PTSD symptoms. Thank you for taking responsibility for yourself!
when a neighbour is instantly friendly & obliging this is a red flag, authentic neighbours observe from a distance then decide for themselves if they want to get acquainted or not, decent neighbours have healthy boundaries & build networks over time, they are not your instant best friend
exactly
ABSOLUTELY
THEY THINK YOUR PRIVACY IS THEIRS
Yes I fell for my toxic predator neighbor, hook, line, and sinker! Now I've finally gone no contact.
Omg as soon as I moved in the man next door shouted across and wanted to know all about us, even down to what is in our garage. After that day they started slamming their doors so loudly the doors came off their hinges. I went next door and complained, and they said ' we don't slam our doors ' they acted like it wasn't them, anyway I don't look at them, speak to them, I act like they don't exist, this of course annoys them very much
And normal neighbours back off when you chill them. A narc neighbour pushes harder. Super red flag.
NO ABSOLUTELY NOT. NOBODY SHOULD HAVE TO LEAVE THEIR HOUSE BC OF A CRAZY NEIGHBOUR.
Yes but you can't un know your crazy neighbor, so you either learn to manage it better or move!
Sanity is priceless, and when you lose it, everything crumbles
Our neighborhood narc has caused four families to sell and move over the past 17+ years. We are his newest target and has been non stop for close to 7 years. We refuse to move so he keeps up his insanity.
I seen another video here on TH-cam that tells about how to make a narcissistic neighbor get justice for their behavior. It was about writing an email to authorities like HOA about trying to get resolution, which also shows their behavior, and when they reply or react, it proves to others how bad their behavior is. It actually happened to a lady named Melanie here on TH-cam, and it caused her narcissistic neighbor to move.
Had my narc next door 21 Years . I ignore but I'm smeared and have fly monkeys . Couldn't care less . I never react . I'm sure people know his the nut job
DO NOT BE FRIENDS WITH CLOSE NEIGHBORS. Just don't. When something goes wrong, then you have to move? That's a bad spot to be in. If your opposite sex neighbor is really friendly right away, or wants to date, that's an instant red flag. Screw "compassion"- when you get the vibe, tell them not to fuck with you and stand your ground in a normal way. When that voice says "don't go out now, maybe he's there?"- No, go on with life as usual. Do not let them control your behavior.
I totally agree. I said to my neighbour right at the beginning in a polite way that ' I keep to myself' My neighbour doesn't seem to get it. You are right ,if things go wrong, it will really go wrong. It also puts you in an awkward situation say if they had some DV issue and you were compelled to report it to police for a welfare check.
Very true. We are rational people trying to deal with irrational people and they will take advantage of that.
my neighbour is a emotional predator.
Mine too
@@jordannicol8864 if your neighbor is very defensive and reacts with anger, this may be a sign there are emotional sensitivities, and signs of narcissism. Narcissists are quite emotionally sensitive due to having a fragile ego and low self esteem. Non narcs are confident about who they are and if their character is assassinated by someone, they don't feel it is necessary to react negatively to defend their honor. Narcs fight to the end to defend their honor, any slight perception they are being undermined, will set them off. Narcs also can't accept criticism because it's an attack on their ego. They will lash out in a fury of rage. Non narcs are less, emotionally sensitive compared to narcs.
My neighbor is too
Mine too. The bad thing is that since we have not reacted at all to him, it's caused him to get worse and go to great extremes! And we did not communicate with him much at all before this, it was just like a 2 minute converstaion once every 2 or 4 weeks, but we allowed him to say shocking, terrible things that he knew upset us, but even though we did not react, just ignoring it was enough to ALLOW IT. Once we stopped communication, we were no longer allowing it, and even though it did not happen very often, it was enough to cause a severe narcissistic injury for him. Now our lives are hell. I only get to sleep about 30 minutes at a time, and today, my husband said that we are going to have to do something different, because I cannot go on like this without sleep. We are trying to figure out how to be safe but at the same time get sleep. My husband missed one day of work because of this, and we have both missed out on a TON of sleep. We are thinking about getting an attorney to send him a letter, hopefully to make him stop & think. He needs someone of authority to tell him that he needs to stop. The bad thing is that I used to spend a lot of time outside with my pet, and we have not been outside much at all, because every time we've taken a walk since this happened, the neighbor is waiting on us outside, at the exact time we take walks, and he says stuff under his breath. He told us that he has a loaded shotfgun right by his door, so we do not want to do anything that could escalate him further.
Yup mine too records my kids especially the ones who have delays. Stalks my fb when I have her blocked yet saying I'm the cyber stalking one says my fb memes are harassing her lol went to court she had made up evidence lying in court bringing up irrelevant stuff lol judge didn't want to see her so call evidence she was pissed lmfao
My God! its like dealing with demons(And i'm not even religious) I have dealt with this scum before and its not a pleasant experience.
I lived with one next door for 8 yrs horrible experience
Sanchia Smith how did you cope?
It's been over 7 for me. I hope by now you or your neighbor has moved.
My sociopath neighbor smeared me to everyone in the neighborhood. People shunned me. She was nice for about three months when we first moved in then got jealous because I could sew a straight line and make diy curtains. All of a sudden I got the silent treatment. Harassing phone call falsely accusing me of things. Total psycho. I couldn’t say anything to anyone. I was new in the neighborhood and no one knew me. This was a blank slate for her smear campaign. she had created a false persona of a really good person and a servant on the civics club and other leadership positions in the hood. Also I loved my house and didn’t want to move. She would say or do anything. Bully me, say rude things like a school yard bully just horrible.
After she fixated on my curtain making skills
Her flying monkeys then got obsessed with curtains. They either wanted to top me with better curtains ( could not be done) or refuse to have any window coverings. As soon as psycho moved away her flying monkey that had no curtains for 13 years finally were free to get window coverings. It was weird. Like she made curtains a thing. I was just doing my best to make my house a home and she got jealous.
My cat mysteriously went missing and the bushes on her side of the yard mysteriously died. I think she poisoned my bushes and killed my cat. She also made multiple calls to the association to report little problems like bushes one inch too high. Things just to harass me. Thank God she moved.
it’s curtains for that narc
Ha! Curtains!
The only people who would believe narcs are other narcs. What disturbs me is how they will deprive themselves for the lead narc then blame the victim for causing all of this instead of ignoring the lead narc and doing what they want to do. The problem is they want to torment that person so they get glory bi-proxy. Stupid thing about it is there's no glory.
I am truly sorry for what you endured. I have been going through this for years. My neighbor has also spread lies about me. She has done so many evil things to me. The Latest is she had a pool and jacuzzi put in her back yard. She had her Gardner reach over onto my property and cut my flowered bushes so she could spy on me. Then about a month later accused me of putting dog poop in her jacuzzi and pool. She knew my dog passed away. I believe she made it up. She threatens to burn down my home with me in it and has done many horrible things. I have to leave my curtains closed otherwise she and her cameras can see right in my home. If I am gardening out back she spies on me.
Don’t get too involved with neighbors until maybe you get to know them much better.
Have lived with a crazy narcissist neighbour from hell...6 years awful experiences..such as banging doors and cabinets, hoovering banging the wooden furnitures and tables etc, dropping heavy bouncing objects in their wooden floor on and off like a rituals, heavy footsteps, 3 times hammering & drilling rituals in a year for attention (previous homeowners in that house never do that), envious and jealous kept throwing things in our garden for attention such as small tree branches, pulled grass with soil, plastic handle , kept peeping in their window to monitor our movements & get jealous, dropped objects or park their cars in the turning space to cause nuisance to us and other people when they got jealous, ; showed copycat behaviours loves mirrorring ; hit our bin and left mess to the next door neighbour to cause trouble ; kept blocking the turning space w/o consideration to others ; FANTASIST claimed they encountered many wasp bees in their back house with no flowers only hedge while WE DONT see many wasp bee at all coz theyre jealous we got flowers in the garden ; just dropped some of their cut hedge branches into our garden..; arrogant No respect to others property and other problems / nuisance...theyre people from hell....
Jeffrey Dedeyne I took a lot of videos and photos of their nuisance and noise at home as a big evidence....i will show those videos and photos to the authorities, tv program and in court if they pushed me to the limit...Im just waiting for them to file a court case and i will show to the judge and tv program how selfish, malicious and fantasist they are....Im going to join the tv program about nightmare neighbours to name and shame them...
Going through the same thing you must be better looking and better than them in everything they are losers so they dont want to see others happy because they arent happy in their lives.
I'm going through this now, neighbour throws dog poo empty pop bottles in to my garden even had a dirty personal sainatory towel chucked over, to get my attention, got the mirroring going on to,, the most uncomfortable feeling my predator neighbour gives me, is when I go outside neighbour, no matter what, makes their presence known, by banging up the fence or sniggering, I think it's because I've never given a reaction neighbour is so obsessing for,❤🇬🇧
@@najlasyed9172 I'm going through the same thing right now myself. Bringing their garage can on my side of the street. Standing at the curb when I leave out for work in the mornings. Waiting for me to get home. Parking in front of my house when they really don't have to. These people are just downright sick in the head.
@@randyfuller3057 You're not alone. Our psychopathic neighbor doesn't work and watches us all day. My wife goes out to garden and he pounces on her with this sickly sweet act ( he's some kind of cult leader ). He's always asking favors like to borrow our green waste container just to harass my wife. He recently hinted about loaning him our car. We didn't, so he borrowed a junker from someone and now he parks it in front of our house claiming that it's too low to park it in front of his house. The car is loud because there is no muffler and he slams the doors and whistles loudly every time he uses it. It riles up the dogs and stresses us out. Sucks.
Lived next to one for over 20 years, he's an older Italian man (70's) 3 months ago I completely started to ignore him. I don't even acknowledge him when he talks to me. It took about about a month, he called my wife a whore trying to get under my skin. Now, I'm a Marine it's pretty hard to get under my skin but, I wanted to beat his ass for calling my wife a whore. Instead I considered the source and kept ignoring him. After the Second month he stopped talking to me. If I ever catch him on my property, all bets are off, old man or not.
I do the same, ignore them, even if they talk to me. I don't trust my neighbours at all. I don't give them any information but it is tricky as other neighbours still talk but I just want to be private and a mystery to them, that confuses them
Thank you so much for this video, I'm glad I'm not alone,My narcissist neighbour is an experienced predator always waiting for her prey, I've never reacted to any pettiness, I think thats why she want leave me alone, shes become obsessed with my every move I make outside, she makes her present known, it's awful but, it's best to ignore them, than fuel them with the power they are starving for ❤🇬🇧.
It is so annoying. When you are out in the garden, they always come out and want to chat
Man my narc neighbors are gang stalking. It’s a big ex con man and this older sugar mama. The guy parks his car right out front my living room window every single day multiple times a day and will sit there for hours! Blasting music yelling cussing loitering littering you name it. I have ptsd due to being abused multiple times by big shady looking male characters like him and he’ll be out there with the other neighborhood narc males hanging in front of my apt. It got to the point I had to tell my landlord. Jus asked her if she could tell him to do that in front of his own building and not mine. Mind you he’s not even on the lease. Biggest mistake! My landlord is a narcissist too and whatever she said made it worse. They’re both now making a point to park and sit there for hours and yell and blast music and they both started standing out front smoking cigarettes and pointing towards my living room. I’m scared af!! I can’t move. I’m a single woman no family, no visitors. And financially can’t afford to move and can’t find a new place:(( I’m scared to leave my house now and feel like I’m constantly being watched. All of this because I asked for him to hangout in front of his own building which is right next to mine. There’s a parking driveway and gate in between us. This dude pulled up the other day playing a loud ass trap song that went “I got murder on my mind” over and over like wtf! I’m losing it
Two major lessons learned -- 1. Avoid at all costs buying a home in an HOA. HOA's are often weaponized by sociopaths and covert narcs. 2. Focus on boundaries from Day One, Minute One after moving in. Assume every neighbor is a covert narc or will become one with you until they prove otherwise. All the getting to know you banter needs to be watered down, act distracted, pretend to get a cell phone call whenever they start to pull info from you, have the phone in your hand when they ring your doorbell so you have an excuse to break off, do not provide an email address or cell phone number. Save all of the above for that neighbor that is your best friend after years of living near one another.
Wow that sounds like war..
@@TheRealJohnHooper Yes! But it just depends on how much you value your home, freedom and your rights under the Constitution, the law and the Covenants you buy into. A lot of people let the Karen and tyrants rule over them. If you stand up to them sometimes they shrink away but sometimes they take things to the next level. And it can feel like a non-shooting war. We moved away from our last HOA home due to the control freaks and their covert meetings and processes.
good advice. In this day and age neighbors can become a big pain due to the expansion of HOA's and their many powers and lack of accountability
Yes, Yes, Yes! GREAT ADVICE, people let their guard down too easily, and once you realize they're narcissistic, it's too late. You are so right! Once they learn a "weakness", or anything that might upset you (something as simple as being a pet owner/pet lover is a dangerous thing to let a narcissistic person know) which is usually the first or 2nd time you meet them, it's too late. Once you give a narcissist an inch, they take a hundred miles. Our covert narc neighbor seemed so harmless, and we ignored shocking things he said in small, 2 minute conversations that only happened about once a month - which taught him that we were OKAY with allowing him to say things like that. He was so sure that we would allow it, that even after he caused us major trouble after we set a boundary, he truly thought we would still be friendly with him, he stopped and tried to talk to my husband like nothing happened!
When he made one of those shocking comments in the last conversation he had with my husband, expecting my husband to just ignore it, my husband spoke up and told him that his complaint had nothing to do with us, and it caused a severe narcissistic injury. We new he was narcissistic, but he is covert, which tricks you into thinking they aren't harmful, but when they're hurt, they do they worst things, passive aggressive, sneaky things that pop up out of the blue that no one would ever expect, and at first, you wonder if it's coincidence, and you question whether you're reading something into it, then it hits again and you feel like a fool for not seeing it in the first place. Even though I thought I knew how to handle a narcissist pretty well, I found out that the worst mistake I made was to allow a stranger to know something about us that could be used against us - but, even if we had not said anything, just the fact that we owned a pet allowed our neighbor to know we were animal lovers, so he knew how to test us and what to use. It was so simple, he said shocking things about animals, and we ignored it, not wanting to judge him, but discerning that someone is trying to get narc supply is not judging them, it's recognizing their behavior for what it is and not ignoring it.
@@SydMountaineer Wow, sounds like the same exact scenario we went through. When our beloved 17 year old cat died, we adopted four elderly cats when their owner died. We lived in a single family home. The group of narcs in this neighborhood started asking me to confirm the number of cats without saying why. Every day they would ask me in passing. Our covenants said any reasonable number of cats or dogs in accordance with local ordinances. Local ordinances did not limit cats. But out covenants allowed the board to adopt rules and regulations so they were letting me know they would limit the number of our elderly indoor cats. We knew then we had to move and we sold our lovely home and moved to the country after only two years in our dream home. Now although we dont live in an HOA, we never say anything to neighbor in passing other than vague generic stuff. No details, no personal info at all.....
ABSOLUTELY NO WAY WILL I MOVE FROM THE HOUSE THAT GOD BLESSED ME TO HAVE!
I would have 911 on speed dial. For God gave us not a spirit of fearfulness; but of power and love and discipline. ... You have to defend yourself some kind of a way, get a surveillance camera, get a German Shepherd dog, get a police report of all violations to you and your property. And most of all, follow through with everything! DON’T WORRY, AND DON’T BE AFRAID. God will take care of you!!!! 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
So sorry, but no, God won't take care of you. Christians have been murdered by narcissists. A lot of those Christians probably prayed for help in their last moments. This is one of the many reasons why I believe religion does far more harm than good. People truly believe their god will save them, so they become reckless or fail to take steps to protect themselves. Aside from a good therapist, friends and family, *_you are on your own._* The cops don't care, either.
I've been cursed with more than one narcissistic neighbor. I'm sure my religious mother prays every day that they don't hurt me, but they have hurt me. They will continue to do so. Emptying the jails and defunding the police means disabled people like me will be living next door to ne'er-do-wells for the foreseeable future.
Instead of relying on a deity, here are some tips: 1) Stay away from narcissists as much as possible, 2) Buy security cameras, 3) Buy a way to physically secure your door, 3) In accordance with laws in your area, record everything! Spy shops have some good gear, 4) There are ways to turn your cell phone into a body cam. 5) Practice quick drawing your self-defense items and know their abilities and drawbacks. Pepper gel is less likely to end up back in your face than pepper spray, but it still can. Trust me on this.
Be mentally prepared to take a life if you absolutely must. The narcissist doesn't care about taking yours, so if it gets physical, you cannot hold back, especially if you have a disability. If you are forced to take a life, know what to do afterward. DON'T WAIT; DO THE RESEARCH NOW! Here's a tip: Cops are *NOT* your friends. They haven't stopped the narcissist from turning your life upside down. Why would they be on your side when you are forced to do their job for them? It makes them look bad. Assume they're all as stupid and cowardly as the ones in Uvalde and you won't be far off.
Ignore the fairytales and face harsh reality. At least it will give you a fighting chance.
I haven't spoken to my neighbour for years but I swear he does not give up. He has been smearing me for years. I can agree that it gets worse but recently I did go to the police who gave him a warning. The threatening behaviour stopped but the smearing (which isn't illegal) has carried on. You have to be clear like Meredith days, nothing aggressive. The police warned
me that there would be a backlash and there was, but only on the sense that he is constantly looking for narcissistic supply. Over the years he has cut down my hedges and a tree I had in the front garden, saying that tho the smearing continues I am very glad I went to the police and should have done it sooner because the more I ignored him the more he carried on and the worse he got, you report it he will be on the radar. Stay strong. According to my neighbour I have split up three marriages, etc he has told me he will make my life hell. I will not leave my house as I still love my home which is bought. My neighbour is a tenant. I think women on there own are vulnerable. If he is a narc you may have to end up using the grey rock treatment and even get the police involved if he reacts badly. Believe me I tried to be nice with my neighbour it didn't work.
My story is similar to yours. I called the police and he stopped verbally attacking me. However, he still continues the abuse covertly. Like enlisting flying monkeys and giving me deadly stares all the time. Narcs never give up, but only find alternatives to intimidate their targets. They just don't get it and never will
The only way you can stop a narcissist.. and this is something you cant really do, is to beat him physically.. They are little toddlers, it is the only boundary they accept.. Every bully stops immediately if they get beaten up.. But as I said, you cant do that in real life.. So they never stop..
John Hooper I am afraid I can’t read all of your reply, but thanks for responding. He has started AGAIN but following a visit from a housing official with the risk of losing his home we have peace again. I have extensive recordings of him threatening me. It’s the first time he had had the police and a housing official have been directly involved. I am confident if I had a husband this would ever have happened. But I am not a victim. Thankfully I do not think he is a complete psychopath. The biggest thing I have over him is the ability to record him and the fact that he is a tenant.
Stay strong, I'm going through the same with my narcissist neighbour, I never heard of narcissists or sociopaths until neighbour moved in next door, I'm just pleased i came across the grey rock treatment, it gets to my neighbour, but I will not give the power neighbour wants, ❤🇬🇧
poppie 98 thanks for your reply. I don’t know why the whole message does not come up. I live in the U.K. and it’s three years since I originally posted. Amazingly my neighbour has stopped after I repeatedly raised it with the council and the police basically he has been threatened with eviction for his behaviour. So he has stopped because finally his behaviour has a consequence to him. All the best for your situation O hope you are free soon.
Ok, I tried no contact and it didn't work. I tried telling 'em off and it didn't work. I tried making police reports and it didn't work because our justice system is kinda slow and doesn't take stalking very seriously. I even texted one of these gang stalkers to stop and they seriously don't get it. I'm so agitated with these crazy neighbors of mine, I'm like this close 🤏 to making a looooong expose video and just telling everything I've dealt with and showing all the messages, emails, I've tried to send to have them leave me alone. 🙄😑
I didn't know what narcissists were before I lived here, but now all the signs are clear. They're clearly crazy.
Thanks so much! I lived next door to a narcissist so I'm going to move too! She thinks because I'm friendly to her that suddenly she's my best friend but she doesn't know that I'm not her friend. I just go along with her to stop arguing because for her it's about me arguing, never about her. So yes, I'm getting ready to move out.
My neighbor is controlling. At first, she was nice and we would hang out but I feel very drained and like she stalls me so that I don't leave. I can feel it.She would knock on my door unexpected at 7:00 am expecting me to get up to have coffee with her. She made a "request" that I say hello and goodbye when I would come and go from my apartment. She's nuts. I tried to look past her behavior as just a character defect. Well, she kept crossing the line with her little below the belt jabs and indirect insults. So I completely shut her out of my life. We live next door to one another. We went from in her words, "Buddies" to complete strangers! I love it! Her behavior indicates to me that she requires a lot of attention. She doesn't like to be alone. So I do the complete opposite and completely pretend like she doesn't exist. She hates it! She has always expressed in the past that she hates being rejected. I wouldn't mind her so much but I refuse to tolerate disrespect with her insults and belittling of me. (I made the mistake of divulging too much about myself when I first met her.)I only say hello and goodbye and I only answer her questions with closed ended responses. I am not her husband, (mate)daughter, sister, brother, friend or emotional punching bag, I am her neighbor and I will never allow for anyone to treat me less than I deserve.
@neesee520 Amen! This sounds exactly like my neighbor and you know what? I don't have to be nice to her or even acknowledge her.
I have a narc neighbors as well i recorded everything they have done on my channel, they watch me and are just completely weird
Consider putting a no trespassing sign up in your yard at every entrance. In some states it is legal for people to go on your property unless you have a no trespassing sign. I went so far as writing the nasty neighbor's name on a blank space below the no trespassing. I did what I needed to do after subtle boundaries were continuously crossed. His last text to me was a covert insult. I responded 'If you ever text me again, I will consider it harassment & contact the authorities. If you ever step foot on my property again, I will consider it a threat. You have been warned.'
L B Good idea..ill do the same thing..Im going to post 3 No trespassing in our property...and took photos and videos if i caught them...or install cctv cameras as well...thanks
Big deal. Won't work for the real ones. I put them up and took photos and found them thrown in my front yard. My nephew and I replaced them, took more photos and a week later they're all missing. During that week I saw them smirking at me through a floor-to-ceiling glass window and there was a large fire in their fireplace. Deputies acted like I was ridiculous to want to make a report even though attorney advice was to put a no trespassing-violators will be prosecuted. They will not be prosecuted, sadly this no trespassing sign thing is a hopeless bit of a joke spread around the net for most people.
@@publicname60 that is criminal damage,
If you have a narc/psychopathic neighbour, keep Journals and photo/video evidence, but don't tell them you are.
Excellent video. Yes, you don't want to look isolated, and having people visit you is a good idea. I had the same issue at work, people thought I had no friends, so they workplace bullied me but I worked in a hotel and I got my bf to come over and stay and they didn't know he was my bf and he spotted one of the bullies at work putting something nasty on the computer and told them off
Why do they "demand" attention ? Be the loudest, be sure they are seen etc ? If you are better at something than they are they attack you for it...….then start stuff against you. My case, I saved money and took vacations...refused to lend them any more money.....BAM I was a horrible person to veryone on our block
When they meet somebody decent it really bothers them. Because they know they're not s***
Envy envy ENVY
They try to mirror you and not even doing it right
So I live next to one now. And it's been over a year of narcissistic issues by the neighbor. But I have fought back, down to his level, and haven't showed any signs of backing down or being intimidated. It has kept him at bay. However, it will only be a matter of time before he acts up again. And that is when I will lower myself to his level to.fight him off. By the way, my neighbor has brought his detective friend over in his unmarked car, and I pulled right behind that car and wrote down the exempt plate number. I overheard his police friend say to my neighbor, you dont want to go through this, as though they've done this before. Lesson, you have to either move or fight!
Hi Gene, you also could change your tactic. There are three choices you can make. Move, lower yourself to their level or do exactly the opposite you would do. Do nothing. Try to make yourself happy, Keep ignoring everything he does. Say nothing and keep yourself busy. Listen to music you used to like. These people have issues and don't make it your issue. They really enjoy it when they get a negative response from you. You are better. I stopped talking with my two narcissistic neighbours, people in the village turned their back on me. As long as I don't have these two demons in my neck I'm fine. It's very difficult, everyday is a struggle. But as long as try to make yourself happy and stay in a higher frequency then him, you will be better of in the end.
@@elizabethvandergeest8824 Update, my neighbor is a local police sergeant. Amazing to know this.
@@genep.6008 My neighbour used to be a policemen, after that he once and awhile left for month of and on working as a cook on ships. The other narcissist, his wife, used to be the head of a group at airport customs. So they both think they are smart. They have two sons. The youngest son who got a girlfriend and moved in with them. One day the parents from this girl were visiting and I made a funny remark, which got misunderstood. Mother narc. made some remarks towards me in front of these kind people to make me look like the bad neighbour. I know she is very jealous. We have a diesel service attached to the house. Also when I still lived and worked in the Netherlands, my husband lived in the house with his parents. So she could play them how she wanted. To make a long story short. After to many red flags and to many coincidences of her always being or coming outside when my husband comes home or talks with some neighbours I know now for sure that she is obsessed with him. She is also obsessed about me.
The second older son used to work as a police officer. He has a girlfriend and lives somewhere else. He has his own floor at the parents house. Sometimes they visit for a weekend. He has his own training shooting practising company. So he is full of that and likes to show of his equipment. Actually I like the guy, but he is kinda shy. His new girlfriend seems a nice lady, who I wanted to get to know. I knew she could speak English. But apparently she already got informed about me by the narc mother and the girl got pushed behind the house when I came home. My vegetable.garden is between our houses. So in summer much work to do. They start inviting people and because I had decided not to speak to those two anymore, it's very in in uncomfortable to say the least. There are so many things to tell, but it's clear these people are clearly not happy and want to hurt the ones who are on to them. They pull everything out of the closet to ruin your day big time. With gossip, intimidation and what not. They are like little babies acting mature. I guess everybody has this inside, but you have to make a choice to save yourself. I have all kinds of scenarios in my head, to tell the truth. But luckily I don't speak the best Bulgarian, kept me from doing it. Kind of, I also have other more important things to do Still the best weapon is to NOT pay attention. Concentrate on your own happiness.
Also I think it's very smart to really, really not to do anything at his level. They really would enjoy you would end up in jail.
For some reason I have never gone out with any one at work or who lives near me. Because it can get really ugly.
You are very wise. I am retired now but always had the policy that I do not date women I work with or get chummy with the men. When things go south, and they will eventually, there you are with them in the workplace. It becomes a hindrance to getting things done on the job. It's not worth it.
Wow thats scary. Your neighbors were gang stalking you.
Court now I’m not dealing w this crap 😮
This was my exact situation and the only cure is moving. He lived 3 doors away and he LEGALLY harassed and made himself a gigantic pain in the @$$. Constantly screaming out his vehicle window driving by, constantly laying on the horn while driving by, constantly calling my dogs names to make the dogs bark and run to his front door, constantly coaxing his dogs to bark non-stop to have my dogs agitated, constantly smearing my reputation and name to all my other neighbors. This went on for 3 years AFTER the breakup. It only stopped because he got evicted for illicting violence and physical fighting with other male nieghbors.
My female neighbour strangled her ex boyfriend's dog. She came running outside with the dog's body. I tried to resuscitate doggy, but air wouldn't go down. Neighbour faked being upset. I had already figured her out before this tragedy. I had an animal communication done and it was confirmed that doggy was indeed strangled. I have been living in fear of her doing something to my dogs and told her yesterday that I know what she has done. Predictably psychopath she started screaming at me and calling me names. Extreme anger, but dead eyes. My husband is not backing me up and believes that my fears are invalid. Although he was the first person to say that she killed the dog. I have ptsd already and can't live like this. Her ex has told me about the way she treated him. He broke up with her, but she still texts him every day that she loves him. He had to block her on all social platforms. She has all the signs of a psychopath. Acting like she cares, playing the victim to get what she wants, stomping around her house in the night etc. We have lived here for almost 2 years. They moved in August last year. I'm at a loss and tired of living in fear.
My neighbour upstairs made a big mistake by not turning down the music when I needed it the most (4:00 a.m. nonsense) and the police liked to help.
I responded with " no not this time " to a request for a favor. I try to live in peace with everyone, but don't give my time to toxic people.
If you believe in God just Pray, ignore them and sit back and watch God take them down for you.
I've been blatantly rude to my neighbour and he still comes over. He doesn't get it. I've trespassed him from my property now.
Thank you so much for this video. I have been going through hell with a Narcissistic Sociopath female as my neighbour. When I bought my house, I introduced myself to several of the neighbours. One neighbour I met has ended up being my absolute enemy. I have never done anything to this woman, other than not wanting anything to do with her as I had that icky feeling about her. I think she took this as an offence. She has made it clear years ago, she hates me, she said she even hates the way I walk. She is now yelling sexual vulgar scenarios that she has conjured up with myself as the main character. In these scenarios, I am sexually being tortured. I recently have had my tires slashed, this has been 12 years of this. I would have moved the first year but my partner said no. He thought it would get better. It also does not affect him personally, as it is me the neighbour wants to hurt. I also have PTSD, so this has greatly affected my life. If anyone is going through any similar type of a situation, whether it is male or female, please do not stay like I have. You deserve to live in your own home in peace and to be happy.
All the best to everyone here!
Shavauna Ronan... if your partner doesn’t feel concern for your wellbeing just because its not happening to him directly, that’s a big red flag. A good partner would recognize that if abuse or harassment is happening to you, that’s unacceptable and that what happens to you, it affects him too.
You’re not alone. I have druggie psychotic neighbors also. They are hateful and demonic. Just like you, I didn’t do anything to them at all. But I won’t be run up into my house, I stand my ground and now they are acting like the victims. They all have behavioral problems.
Never get involved with neighbors when owning a condo or house.
Had same icky feeling, same situation with them being butt hurt I didn't WISH to be their best bud. Shrieks at other neighbor and makes us both cry. Involves our kids. Got new neighbor baited into yelling and doesn't know us. Has cookoo head conspiracies, blabs to new neighbor as fact, new neighbor buys it, thus comes to attack when she hears neighbor shriek. Ugh. Grow up or die, ya know?
I’m moving asap she’s psycho ! Things like pretending she’s not home and parking her car blocks over so I’d be under the assumption that she is not home! To gain leverage over me by listening to all and any of my existence without altering myself as if she was physically park her car in front ! She always secretly competing it’s so disgusting and pitiful to be this way she ill
Left those Mean Narcissistic Neighbors behind & Moved Away from Them!
My neighbors infont , behind, left side and right side of my house are all crazy, they are annoying me even at midnight , manipulating me , spread bad rumors about me and they have many tactics to make me mad!
I have a neighbor that has a delusional idea of where a property boundary is. He refuses to have a survey on his dime, but expects me to have another to prove him wrong. Threats of litigation are spouted from his side, but I blow them off as empty threats.
I see him as the A-hole narcissistic neighbor with an antagonistic attitude because he has no leg to stand on other what he can draw out to feed off of.
The best opinion is a black hole of a person. Everything of reason gets eaten up and not registered.
He had a friend in real estate who got the lock box code, I'm betting (unless ZERO people had seen the house at that point, but otherwise, yeah.....).
I'm so sorry.....
(EXACT same time that I had a coworker stalking me who also knew where I lived and i had to sell my place and move, AND get a new car. I couldn't get a new car at the same time and didn't want him following me to my new home, so changed plates, took out all my items from inside, replaced them with "dude" paraphanelia (?), and got the hospital director (thank god that's where I worked) to give me special permission to park next to the cop cars outside the ER so that he would stay away from my truck to check it out and i could slip in to work through the backside of the hospital...... anyway, it was so scary! I CANNOT believe the camera in your home and them mobbing outside, that's a whole new level of insanity)
I ignore this couple next door completely as Im forced to as years ago I used to be polite with them and was to their family members and would talk with them sometimes. But then they got very agressive about banging on my door or try to often to stop me for a long chat more and more. Then I cut them off completely as they just seemed so desperate and I was never that comfortable around them anyway but now Im just creeped out by them.
This
I never was the "sweet girl" and have out-psychoed many a sociopath. (My stepfather was a sociopath...so I was always a magnet for them. With one guy that lived in the same complex....I had a male friend call him and insist he join us in a Satanic ritual. Strange people (aka, my friends) would come and go dressed in black. A rather loud conversation within earshot eluded to flesh fetishes...and other dark things (that really didn't mean anything). Soon....it was over....the calls-all of it. When he realized he would be dealing with lots of people engaged in the dark side (friends of mine acting)....it was all too much. In fact--he avoided me...and finally moved.
Peggy Genoway what a fantastic response! You are amazing and good on you for not being a victim. The police have warned my neighbour and I have also been told if he does anything else I can get him evicted. Wish I'd done it sooner.
Haha nice !!
haha, well played
Had a crazy woman narc neighbor that would blow her horn in the morning everyday like she was letting out her rage
I have that same neighbor too, plus other crazy stuff
She's cray cray
My neighbor above can hear me in my flat and follows me around from room to room even the bathroom he called me a fat c… and I’m disabled. All because I rejected him.
Thanks for sharing your story about your narc neighbor. I'm renting from a nightmare family with similar traits so it's sadly reassuring to not be the only one. Thanks, Meredith!
Thx ✌️️💚 more than likely had the ear pressed against the wall. You sure were put through the mill. I can relate. I've had a little of this too and immediately knew I had to move. Having people over is also a good thing to do. Your intuition is key to the whole problem. I can feel them now. I got good at it. The game was called survival. Thank God. Most excellent videos and coaching. ;0)
Big hug!
Inner Integration thx and have a lovely day 💙😊✌️️
Thank you for sharing so glad that you brought this topic. Blessings to you
Thank you SO much Meredith for your encouraging words! Very helpful!
Happy it's helpful! Big hug.
Oh my! I can not get enough of your video's! Your advice is like a breath of fresh air!! Thank you so much!
After 3 separate Municipal Harassment Convictions, our Narcissist Stalkers were ordered to undergo Mandatory State of NJ Psychological Examinations after admitting to lying to people in order to encourage others to retaliate for false accusations of assaults and abuses claimed by them where they were hoping to get others to physically assault myself and my family.
Even after 3 consecutive trials resulted in convictions for harassment as well as property damage and trespassing where we successfully defended 16 false and escalating counter charges filed in an attempt to bully us into dropping the charges we filed these stalkers sued my family in NJ Courts using illegally Obtained Mental Health Records edited to contain slanderous and demeaning details lying about me and sued to have Me, never convicted of anything and proven to be the Victims thru 3 precious convictions against them, they sued to have me removed from my own home which we have owned since 1954.
My Rules have always been:
No Retaliation
Document
Prosecute
Police are no help, township official’s and county official’s cover up their helping to target us and their acting on tens of false accusations.
They accused us of abusing my grandmother in our home where she did not live and sent letters to Enforcement Officials stating she was near death due to our neglect within our home, that she would surely die if immediate response and intervention did not take place adding that if she died the newspapers would be given evidence that her death was caused by the Lack of Response to being alerted to the dire situation.
This resulted in our being threatened by Township officials and our home searched without a warrant and against our objections, twice with the threat of Police Forcing entry if we did not stand aside.
After determining no issues whatsoever within our home and none of the alleged abuse accusations to have any basis in fact the township officials caught on video then began asking the 76 year old owner of the home to allow photos of the interior of our entire home as proof to give to our stalkers who made the accusations even though we have had a no contact / no trespassing order for 8 years at that point.
I followed the DOJ instructions online for documenting stalking and police would not review the evidence treating it as if we were part of the issue.
For Retaliatory Narcissists that set out to destroy lives and reputations there is no help at all for victims in the Justice system.
The Stalking support talks a big game but goes absolutely nothing while victims continue sometimes for decades to suffer.
I have videos on my DanielinNJ TH-cam page
Where is mental health 😮
I have these creepy 70 year old neighbours and I don't communicate with them but the seem to see me 'as a challenge'. Male neighbours can be unpredictable and scary, my female neighbours tend to gaslight and smear. Both of the men have shotguns which is scary
My upstairs neighbor is a sociopath. She has been stalking me for 6.5 years by knocking on the ceiling over my bed in the wee hours. After a year of this I found a shoplifting arrest on her. I still could not get the landlord to help me. She jiggled my doorknob, crashed into me in the lobby, and wrote on the wallpaper on my floor. I filed 6 police reports and the cops would not help me. When I made her arrest known in the building, she put all her stuff in storage and pretended to move out. She paid fake tenants to take over the apartment. They come and go but do not live there. She has been hiding in there for over 2 years now continuing to stalk me. There are many people who have been manipulated and paid off so she can continue this. I am at my wits end. Sometimes I am able to practice GREY ROCK and sometimes I have a slip and engage with one of them and then I feel toxic for a few days! OMG....I can't tell anyone as I would appear crazy. My neighbors think she is gone now for 2 years!
I lead a quiet life and I get my neighbours trying to talk to me through the hedge, it is totally uncivilised, that is bad enough but they can see I am busy lawn mowing etc. Neighbours have no boundaries. They must find me very interesting. I have had to put up more privacy fences, but even then I don't expect they get the hint. Sometimes they try to talk to my partner ' in the back garden and get information about the next neighbour'. The next neighbour is my mother but they didn't know that that was my mother when they wanted to be nosy. The other day they asked me if I was XXX and I didn't reply. If I did, they would realise that my next door neighbour is my mother and we caught them being nosy about her. Another neighbour who is 60 was caught trespassing and he was in fact climbing over the gate on the field and I told him that was not the public footpath. He started gaslighting. The next day we put barbed wire on the fence. I could tell you a lot more about my narc neighbours. I don't want to get involved with them at all lol
I went too party in my apartment bldg and ever since one of the men there found out I'm downstairs from him he makes the hooping and hollering noises intermittently every night from about 10 to migrate. I have been stalked by many different people in the last 30 years. I'm low income and can't afford to move again. I had to move with the last one. This place felt safe for about 2 years. It feel so triggered and hopeless.
I'm so sorry this happened. My neighbors would also make weird noises. I didn't even throw a party or do anything loud. *shrug*
Are things better now?
I'm going through this , I cover my window with black curtains , I live in a condo community, facing each other , but other than that the neighbors I don't communicate with , have their friends following me , cops been call , but b4 the following all this has to do with my private car port 🤣,
I swear , it's ridiculous, I'm come and go , but I know they have friends following me , cops can't do nothing unless they treathen or approach me , from them or their friends , not only that this is a couple on drugs meth .
I need good advice , I fear my life , but I like I said I come and go take my dog out like I do daily , there's just bad vibes around .
😧
You have to move sweetheart... there is no good coming out of this. You deserve to give yourself better, and if you don't do it you'll probably regret it when things get worse and worse. Xxx
I have a older woman that lives below me. It's a two story house but the floors are split into two homes.
The older woman has made it her job to make our life a living hell. She accused us of breaking in right after we signed the lease. We didn't even have the key yet, not till weeks later.
She has two tv's with surround sound. One in her bedroom and another in her living room. She will make it her job to turn it up so loud that we can't think. She will turn both on so loud.
We will ask her to turn it down but 100% of the time it goes up or she ignores us.
We had work done on the power here for the outlets. They needed to flip all the breakers back on and she never answered the door, phone, text, email, however the workers and ourselves see her in the back yard with her dog. Ignore the flag down from the workers. Ignore everyone. Just being really stubborn.
We had to sit in a dark house for a whole night because the landlord couldn't or wouldn't get through to her.
She has a dog. She will put the dog out and make him cry for hours in the morning. Sleeping in. Nope.
She has accused us of stealing. 1 a walking stick. 2 gardening tools. 3 her mail. 4 a package full of medication.
None of the above was stolen from us. There was work after she accused us either. No follow up or stress it was missing. It's just a head game it seems to her. It's easy to make us look really bad because we are new. We arnt the people she's accusing us to be.
She has never once had a face to face conversation with any of us. (My boy friend or myself) I made her a gift basket when we first moved in and hand wrote her a nice note. She responded with a long text on how the rules are to go in this home. She claimed this whole house as hers.
At this point the landlord has to install cameras. It's something I begged to clear our name because we are anything but theifs.
I have a life. My family is going through a lot and I am trying so hard to be there for my mother. I am emotionally weak. This woman is kicking me while I'm down because she wants me out. I have done everything I possibly can to be sweet to her and have a positive relationship. It's something I stressed to her from the start.
I am beaten into defeat. I want to move now and it's not even 4 months yet. I have nightmares about her. I'm scared. My character is soiled and I can't stand up for myself right now without getting mega emotional via anger or crying. We love this home and location. We want to plan a family and marriage. We live in Vancouver and the relestate is so bad. Being home owners right is just impossible. Even moving to find a home like this is not easy or possible.
I don't know what to do. I'm home all the time. I work from home. My bf has an office job and can leave. I'm stuck here. I'm miserable. No one really hears me or cares it seems.
I feel like I'm downing. I don't know what to do.
@@jpa5099 Thank you. My bf is taking control of the situation now. The landlord help him figure out last night she has something against my bf's race and gender. They live chatted and he heard the tv volume. The landlord doesn't want to lose us apparently, so last night and all day today it's been nice and quiet. She just turned the tv up now but if it gets to late and still like this the landlord said he will step in again. We love this place, we love the veiw. It's a hidden gem. We started looking at places last night and I just broke so hard. I can't do it. I rather we nag the landlord till he kicks us out. Or her... For now I just want to be here and be happy. Thank you for your support. We know we will probably have to leave but we want to stay and stand our ground a bit longer.
I mean I think it's a bad idea to date ur neighbor cus what if u guys break up then u see them with someone new and it can cause a lot of problems and jealousy and stuff like that!
Omg hi Mer, it’s been so long , I’ve healed so I don’t get on here as much, so glad I ran across your channel ❤❤, keep up the good work to bring much needed awareness about these type of disorders Npd, Bpd,anti social. Thanks 🙏 ❤
I've got two of them as neighbors in an apartment. One is spreading malicious gossip among the others & the second neighbor which I call an "agent" is shining high powered lights into my windows & whenever he gets the opportunity is staring into the windows for whatever reason.. I've since gone no contact or the best I'm able to. As bad as my situation is I still think going on a date with a narcissist or being stalked as you mentioned in your video is considerably worse. I watched your other video which offered good advise on the subject. I don't see my situation improving anytime soon so probably going to have to move again.
They live too stalk
I have a narcissistic next door neighbour and I ignore him completely which drives him crazy. I refuse to be intimidated and his smear campaign ( he was in our neighbourhood before me and he started his campaign as I was preparing my property to move in ) bothers me not one bit, people either like me or they don’t ! It’s obvious who he’s gotten to but who cares !? I keep myself to myself and I want no problems but those who want problems can have them. Learn to not care about how people view you unless they matter to you. If they don’t matter to you ( but be a good neighbour ) don’t worry if you don’t matter to them . F them and bring it on if that’s what they want, I couldn’t care less ! Will I move house to escape him ? Will I Fxxk !
what if you can't invite ppl over because you have none
I was fooled by a covert narcissist neighbor because I fell for her sob story about her malignant narcissistic soon to be ex-husband. She hit me with her ongoing drama very early on in fact from our first conversation. Her pity ploy worked and very soon I was attached to her and her little boy and treating her like she was a family member and providing her with free child care and I was trying to rescue her from all her problems. Fast forward to four years later and when I had an emotional crisis with my clinically diagnosed BPD/malignant narcissist adult son; she was judgmental, critical, dismissive, and a real jerk towards me. Her false persona is that of an emotionally struggling, nice, single Mom but she is really a wolf in sheep's clothing. She stopped her therapy I believe because she did not want to be found out for whom she really is. She will manipulate and take advantage of nice people. I am glad that I am no longer fooled by this person. I am also glad that she moved from my building two years ago. Her communication with me since the pandemic has been intermittent because I cannot do for her anymore so I am not of use to her. Narcissists only think of themselves and that is for sure. You are only as good to them as what you can provide for them. The below video really spoke to me due to my recent experience with a covert narcissist.
I moved into my flat (a block of 4 flats), 3 months ago. He, the neighbour moved in 3 months before me. However as I work close by I have a lot of familiar and kindly other neighbours nearby. This neighbour was very welcoming and friendly, in retrospect too friendly. After I had finished decorating my flat he popped a note through my door about having a curry, with his number. I text him and we went on to have a take away meal in the communal garden, we got chatting and he told me about himself (about his job(s) and briefly his kids), and I told him what I was happy to let him know about me.
I met up with him only one more time also in a communal area. I had just split up from a very destructive relationship, I think this made my neighbour feel I may be vulnerable. I am not, and I told him that I'm not interested in any romantic relationship with ANYONE, and I informed him that I was repairing myself, and needed time to myself to do this. He began to run into me a lot when I was leaving for work, or coming home, he would rush out of his door and 'bump' into me. Give me compliments which I returned with an icy look, he'd quickly say he wasn't trying to chat me up! He would tell me stories about another neighbour keying his car and what not, he had told me only 4 days earlier he was worried that this other neighbour would key his car. There was nothing on his car!
By this point he was texting every single day, mostly crap, just excuses to text. But always including something that made me have to reply.
Long story short (more lies and attempts to manipulate me into doing things to the other neighbour), he finally/desperately pretended to lock himself out of his flat in time for me arriving back from work. His keys were hanging from the door. He seemed to have lost one key from his bunch of keys (there should've been 3x Yale keys.. two for the communal back and front doors, and one for his own front door), I said nothing but a coldness ran through me. I needed time to think, so I offered to make him a cup of tea, and brought it out to him. I chatted and waited for him to drink it so I could take my cup and give him no excuse to knock on my door. I made him chase up the locksmith, from what I could hear from the phone call they were not aware of him or his issue. He messaged me 10 minutes later to say that he had wiggled the key and got in himself. Righto.
I was extremely rude/sarcastic to him the next time he 'ran into me' (just generally, not about anything he had said or done), and this made him leave me alone. Two weeks later, and he starts again, I reply hours later to any text, and as briefly as possible. Then he wants to 'catch up for a drink on a specific night, as he feels he's been an unsociable neighbour' - I decided it was now time to ignore him. at 10:15pm on the specific night he sends me a message that sounds like he expects an explanation for me not getting back to him about the drink apparently that was rude of me. I know he's pushing me for a response, so he finally gets one, not the explanation, or apology that he's looking for. Instead he is told to stop messaging me. I block his number, I change my wifi password (I let him share my wifi as he said he was getting his own in a few weeks, it had now been 8 weeks).. and given his attitude and everything else, I was through with being neighbourly.
He spent the next week banging doors and so on. Finally peace returned to the flats. And I think this time he has got the message. No, he tries to run into me once again, and although he heard me opening and closing my door, then walking up behind him to leave the building, he tried to pull off a ham-act of me giving him a surprise. Unfortunately for him I have a look that I can give that scares folk to death (I caught myself in a window reflection doing it to someone and I can only describe it as demonic, I have very dark brown eyes and they seemingly go very, very dark?). Half an hour later he calls me on my phone, it seems blocking him only stops it ringing through and puts him straight through to the answerphone. He left no message. Another week on and I'm less nervous about leaving/entering the flat. I have never been vulnerable, I have always been strong, I'm very good at reading people and listing to my gut. He never managed to manipulate me, yet still kept trying to!? He is playing with the wrong person, . Although I would rather he just left me the hell alone. I came to live here for peace and to get over my ex.
I've informed all the neighbours I know, and the couple directly across watch for coming home and check I put the light on within 3 minutes of entering the building. Others have said, that if anything happens to come straight to them.
Will he ever get the message, is it now over?
MimiB-Wow he sounds like a nightmare?Has he left you alone now? You've handled it really well though.You're right about the "too friendly" when you first meet them thing. That's a huge red flag as I've learned the hard way.
That's so creepy block his number
I litterly said ´ i am not having any Conversation anymore´... 2 nights it was still and their rage started again.
Try having narcissistic neighbors that are also your co-workers.
Oh no that's pretty bad
I am dealing with a Narcissist neighbor who decided to squat on my property, move in, take over, and now I can't get him out. So I went to court and I was told that I had to settle this in Civil Court which cost $$$$$$ which I can't afford. He is now using my property that I am paying for. I own my home so I have no where to go. I feel like I have lost all the rights to my property.
Here is how that works:
#1 Buy new locks for all doors
#2 Wait until he is away to change them
#3 put his belongings in front yard
#4 when he gets back, call authorities and say these magic words "invited himself onto my property" "asked to leave over and over but refuses" and "I would like this TRESSPASSER removed please". You will be recorded. They will HAVE to respond due to the words tresspasser removed". You have the rights to change your locks, and not give him a key. If he signed no agreement, you own the home and call him a "tresspasser", then it becomes a criminal matter. Also, "I'm going to have to shoot him next time he tries to enter my home illegally like this."
Some good advice
it gets worst and i ignore my neighbor she watches my every move and tries to mimic things i do.I am currently trying to move
Yea well my neighbor next door she's a mom of 4 , she gives me the creeps. She approached me once when I was parked out in front of my house and asked me who I was, there must be past life karma with them and their entire energy gives me the heebee Jeebies. I've been here a long time longer than them but they've been here long too. When she approached me and was asking me who I was and where I lived she was very rude and aggressive.
They sound horrible
The elderly female neighbour living below my appartement has been manipulating me with too loud TV by night and waking me up early in the mornings for six years 😅
Until recently I worked on myself to toughen up and to heal PTSD symptoms from growing up with a narcissitic mother and living with a narcisstic partner.
So I did not get it, until a few weeks ago, that she is basically a covert narcissist messing with me.😮
Last night at 4am she woke me up again by opening her window shutters very loudly.
She knows that I struggle with PTSD. I have already asked her to be quieter.
The shutter throws seem abitary and coincidential, but it is not.
I am not getting enough sleep, although I have almost healed from the complex symptoms I had to deal with for long.
I am very successful with my therapist and things are looking much much better.
Thats how I realised that I am fucked with.
I am shocked to say that out of 8 people living in this house 2 are narcissits and I really do not say that lightly.
Today I woke up the whole house very early because I had to regulate a firey anger that i had surpressed until now.
I took a bath, I shoke my body, I did breathing excercises.
This probably echoes through the whole house, its super old and in the middle of the city with heavy traffic.
Eventually everyone was awake revenging in return with loud music and banging doors.
So this is to reacting to stress and a whole complex system that is easily disturbed.
Than I wrote two letters, one to apologise and explain to my fairly kind but really nosy elder neigbors above me.
The other letter, the third one in 6 years, to the elderly lady below me who seems to terrorise me.
I was assertive but polite and asked her if she is deliberatly causing me pain.
Its worse for me since I told her that I need peace to heal and that she told me she is studying Buddhism. 😅
It really is difficult to deal with this also on a spirituel level.
I am based in Switzerland and I guess passiv aggressiv behaviours are typical for our protestant culture.
Ahw, writing this helps me to find clarity and to keep my voice.
Thanks everybody.
May we all live in peace. ❤
❤
Sorry, but dating you next door neighbor is just asking for drama
i couldnt agree more.
I have done that and caused me so much grief. Never a again.
To the person with the speech impediment and being harassed ignore them don’t show it gets to you their words are just like vapor I too have issue I was born with I bought AirPods put them in block them out in the end they’ll meet their maker and it won’t be pretty 🙏🏾
Neighbors spread rumors and lies about me thinking I am on drugs and their gossip banter fills throughout the complex
I have been harassed, and belittled and i do not know who to trust to talk to about this situation because i feel like I am being spied on...i feel like there is more than one narcissist neighbor and it sucks
What the hell did I do to them for them to hate me? I have a speech impediment God Damnit leave me alone!!!!
Ughhh...I swear some people and I can relate to this video
just know youre def NOT ALONE ive been told im on drugs and the isolation sucks
It's not you they hate. It's your light
TG I did not DATE my neighbor, but finally contacted authorities. Three times, we should not talk to each other. One time, do not call, do not text, do not come onto my property. Came onto my property to leave dumb note in mailbox next day. Called to apologize for yelling at me. I SAID to please NOT do these things, but still doing it and yeah-she's watching her neighbors. At least it's not just me. I want to sue...makes me and other neighbor cry...your story is creepy.
I need a camera pointed at her front door to prove she's baiting and tormenting us. Yech. I just bought my home in 2019-knew she'd be a problem when we first spoke. She'll never stop.
Sadly I have a neighbor like this. He gets rid of official landmarks, builds and digs on my property and then calls the building authorities because his digging and building on my land needs a planning permission.
And because it is my property I need to get the planning permission (costing 4000 Euros) not him!
So now I sue him and he and his attorney lie about everything (proven) which is a criminal offence here in Germany.
I hope the justice system will beat his Porsche driving ass up. lol
He gets on my nerves big time, if he won't back off in the future I will slap his face with a restraining order.
My God- this is just so crazy I am even laughing about how crazy and stupid he is.
Too bad for all the money and my precious time that went down the drain...
Best move especially if there is more than one ☝️...
Agreed!
The majority of the street they wont discuss the problem
AMAZING.
I live with a slew of them....if I could do it over I'd freaking leave. I'd leave in a car, live there until your elsewhere, if you live in NV like I do just toss a coin and do. some states are very very complicated. I've been living like this 3 years horrid ....if I didn't have a court from my neighbor, and my ex....don't open your doors. don't deal with people . this narc neighbor is a complete asshole, when she needs something.....coffee at 9pm...she just text me that at 9pm
when someone wishes me well.....I get pissed, but that's just because I know why ppl do it. lol I'm not like a nut in that way. .....they put cameras in my house. tried to get out. they've arrested me here so I can't get out...they hack phones they do it ALL!!!! gang stalking .
Real time cameras
Absolutely they afraid of em lol 😂
Thank-you love to you🌼💛🤍
Happy Thanksgiving Meredith from Savannah Georgia💕
you become a.prisoner in your home just trying to advoid these people
!No we won't leave they could when you pay tax the neighbor's should respect you if you do, if they don't is there problem!
Its does get worse
I’ve been in my flat since August 2019. I had no problems with the upstairs neighbour until the last couple of weeks. Out of the blue he’s started playing his guitar and stereo super loud whilst banging his heel on the floor and has also taken to stomping continuously up and down his floor making my lampshades shake. So far I have resisted the urge to confront him but I can’t go on like this. I want to know what his problem is all of a sudden...
I think they have a cat too. Seems they always know what your doing? How is this?? Technology or that by nature of narcissism they just spy? Maybe sociopathic? I may want to file several protection orders and I'm a guy getting this from women?! My question is why do they do it?
It's crazy that the police don't do anything and the only answer is to move.
It just leaves the psycho to do it to someone else.
Hi Meredith - thank you so much for this video. I know you posted it two years ago but I'm seeing it for the first time... Actually recently discovering and coming to an understanding of my C PTSD, attachment trauma... Anyway I have a question If you happen to see this.
I have a very problematic downstairs neighbor. I live on the 4th floor walk up in there are two sides of the building and she lives l literally on the first side of the building and the very first apartment so that anyone walking in and out is typically confronted or harassed by her. She's been living in the building from what I understand more than 30 years, we have crumby landlords that have also changed and gotten worse and conscientious within the nine years that I've lived here.
She's always hovering over her ledge seeing who passes in and out of the building. I am99.9% sure that she spends much of her day looking out of her peephole. She triangulates lots of people - I know that she's done that with me with a lot of different people, so even though she's old, it's entirely possible she's gotten certain flying monkeys together. Off the top of my head I can think of a marijuana dealer that she has that has followed me to the laundry room or I see a little too often. I just had a situation where I called 911 and filmed her calling me homophobic and other slurs, announcing my name (first, last)... I allowed this woman to see my vulnerabilities and really allowed her to sweep in and take her under my wing because when I moved in here I was a lot less aware and naive about people.
When I moved in this building, my life was way different and I have not been through that relationship and been through a lot of the things I have. Unfortunately, a lot of grief and abuse and putting different pieces of the puzzle together so to speak, of my life, childhood abuse and so on...have gone on and also risen into my level of consciousness maybe very gradually over years, but very quickly within the last few months. And so I took to her befriending me. There was even one point a few years ago when I was really battling chemical dependency,, and I was coming in and realized I didn't have money for a car so I ring her Bell thinking she's an ally or friend..... As I now remember it I was still high in her apartment as she was berating me for how stupid I was being and what a lack of willpower I had. She never gave me the money either. I ran upstairs to my apartment and hid under the bed because I was experiencing paranoia.
Yes I'm a grown man, and yes she's an old woman, but she is incredibly dark, cruel and problematic and it just is so wrong.I Recently we have lots of people moving in and out of the building... And I've overheard her berate me to a new neighbor, and also she does this type of sardonic laughter that is meant to make me feel bad.
I hate that I reacted at all to her but she was really in my business as I was waiting for a friend in front of my building... That's why I'm certain she looks out her peephole. Now that I'm writing this and from an objective point of view it's really pathetic for somebody to live their life in the pursuit of hurting others but I cannot bring myself to have compassion for cruelty in that way... I'm working on compassion for myself and just maybe regular people in my life or who I meet in passing who I don't feel are narcissistic or psychopathic but can be thoughtless and rude. And I guess I've been doing a really good job @ being present and not being reactive and this really threw me off course off of my game today. And the issue is I don't have money to move away.... In fact I am simultaneously in a whole other situation I won't get into now, where I am financially dependent but also abused by person and have fallen into a learned helplessness & great cognitive dissonance over it.
I know I have to just push through the c-ptsd learned helplessness and get my life back but it has fallen back several notches. Anyway I guess that's a little brief background on my situation. Thank you so much
Don't give up. You have to do absolutely everything you can starting now to take your power back and start to think of some ways to regainour financial autonomy. Look, I know exactly what you feel, from what I'm reading. It may take a while, but you have to start to fight for your life and yourself. The first step is to learn on the situation and solutions by reading books and watching videos. Call help lines and talk to people; you need help. Seek free help from social workers in your community. Start taking responsibility for your situation, but be kind to yourself also. Try to sleep well and eat healthy foods: we sometimes forget we we are deep in but trauma often triggers bad eating habits, which can cause bad gut health, which can cause in its turn more anxiety since lots of hormones are produced in the gut. Dont give up, you're not alone!
One of my narc neighbours is a TV journalist and you can imagine the fakeness, manipulation and ruses I get to get information for her
I started getting that narc-dar blaring the moment my neighbor knocked on my door. She needed help but blew us off then went into our backyard and banging on our backdoor...she did lil insults and I just knew! Yikes. Went almost no contact/grey rock next day. Ughhh i decided to document/diary everything incase I need to build a case. Got no trespassing signs and gate locks.
Calling the cops helps with most cases. Not all. I should’ve called mine a year in instead of four years! She’s stopped ever since because she knows the cops told me to call them if she does anything more. And document everything and save and email to yourself or ipload as unlisted to TH-cam so you always have copies. Prayers to you if you’re battling a narcissist neighbor!!!
How does someone explain (like to authorities or HOA, etc) passive aggressive, covert things a narcissistic neighbor does that makes your family's lives hell? We were not very close with our neighbor, just a short conversation once every 2 weeks or so, just saying/waving hello, we got along fine until finally, after 3 years, my husband had to set a boundary, (very gently) and we stopped communicating with him, and it evidently caused narcissistic injury. Our lives have been turned upside down, and the neighbor made complaints about us.
But so far, everything he does is not a technical crime, and we are hesistating and having much difficulty with explaining to authorities exactly what is happening concerning his behavior afterwards. The authorities are on our side about his complaints about us, they understand that part, (they know he is making ridiculous complaints as revenge for stopping communication with him) but how do we explain his attempts to upset us (other things he does aside from the complaints)? He is going WAY out of his way to scare us, he has escalated - spending money on doing things to scare us. He actually hired a company to come to his house at a certain day and very particular time to scare us, trying to make us think he was doing something bad to wildlife, but it did not work, we did not react like he expected us to, as we new he was trying to trick us. Some of it might seem like coincidences to people who don't know the whole story. What's scary is that this is part stalking, not just harassment, he does some things when my husband is not home, waiting until he leaves for work or when he goes to the store, and some things the opposite, he does ONLY on my husband's first day off each week - and right before he did it the first time, in the last conversation he had with my husband, he literally asked him what time he went to work and what days he had off! Then, afterwards, he expected us to just forget about it, and tried to act friendly to my husband, but when my husband did not respond to his greeting, he amped things up, and it has caused lack of sleep and a lot of stress. He is spending a lot of effort & time to try to upset us, but we are not showing that we are upset, we are ignoring completely, and I got so overwhelmed that I had to go away for the day, several times just so I would not have to deal with it, we feel like prisoners in our own home.
We have not engaged in any way except for my husband setting the boundary, and it was very gentle, he just told him, in reply to blaming us for something that we had no control over, that there we could not do anything about what was happening to him. (He has blamed us and used to complain in general for the fact that wildlife shares our environment, every time he sees a raccoon, armadillo, etc, he blames US, and confuses a wildlife sighting with "nuisance". He knows we are animal lovers, so every conversation we've ever had with him, he has made comments about how he's going to kill wildlife with his gun, how he "hates" wildlife and pets, and how he plans to trap wildlife for no good reasons.
Animal control and the NWC has already told him that they will NOT remove wildlife unless they are injured or a nuisance, but this does not satisfy him. But, it's not really the wildlife, it is US that he is trying to affect - yes, he hates animals, but he has never (as of yet, anyways, that we know of) tried to kill or trap wildlife, it's just that when he found out our "weakness", the fact that we like animals, he enjoyed saying shocking things to us about animals, even though we did not react badly, he KNEW it upset us, and what we did wrong was allowing him to say those things time after time, the first time he said something like that we should've never talked to him again.
The reason why he's doing these things to us is because we stopped communicating with him, which stopped allowing him to say terrible things to us anymore about wildlife. Before, when he would say these things, we did not get upset or verbally abusive, we just simply ignored it, but we ALLOWED it, but he knew that we did not like it, because once I reacted, but not in a bad way, I just simply told him that killing wildlife was against the law. It has escalated since, and I'm actually suprised that he has taken it this far, he is really trying to cause us to confront him, but we will never do that. We want to warn the HOA, because we think that he might make another bogus claim about us, we want to let them know WHY he's doing it, as if they understand the situation, they would hopefully know that he needs someone of authority to flat out tell him that wildlife IS allowed to be in our environment, it's theirs too. Our neighbor hates the Florida - Friendly Landscaping statute, because it says that responsible homeowners should be attracting wildlife by planting certain plants for food & cover, to help the environment, as healthy wildlife makes for a healthy environment, and he hates other neighbors who follow the florida -friendly landscaping practices. Our neighbor has no trees or bushes in his yard, no plants, just all rocks, but hates that other people do care about the environment. Yet he puts his garbage out without a can, which is technically wrong, as it's inadvertently feeding wildlife, yet he makes complaints about others. He literally blames US for little tiny holes in his yard made by some type of wildlife, yet he does not even take care of his yard, it's not even real grass, just mostly weeds, and he has ZERO plants, no trees, no bushes, just rocks.
May I suggest cameras?
My neighbors poisoned my dog tried to have me locked up for something I didn’t do smeared me on social media sent in a monkey monster etc
Etc the cameras have kept them in check and given me peace of mind
No matter where you go there will be a narcissist if you are an Empath you are a target
Cameras and report to the police FIRST don’t wait and document document document then work on your healing
Many of us are hurting and narcissists can smell blood like the stalking predators they are
Work on your stuff and stay in peace
Never respond to the narcissist after the police call is made I put my cameras in when I ran from the last Luny tune in an effort to protect my Amazon packages I thought the night mare was over
My dog is okay and I’m learning I am protected so is she
Concentrate on your purpose.Let THEM go crazy
Go to police functions and fundraisers make the cops your best friends
Don’t isolate
Find your tribe get support
You are the narcissists destruction and you are worth the work
Take good care of yourself fellow light bearer
You are SO very loved and necessary
Wish I could correct the auto correct in my message. Well you get the picture.
Wow, just wow!! Same, they know exactly what I am doing in real time!! I see holes in the ceilings, I have covered them as much as possible. I have covered all of the windows. I use noise machines but yet they still follow me around. Jumping up and down on the floor of the room they just followed me into . Running to the window to watch me leave . It's just so unbelievable the things they do day in and out. It's a nightmare!! No peace in my own home...ever!!!
You have to keep quiet and document everything!
Please a short letter and to the point but before write the letter get a lawyer advise before , because an e mail is an admision. Get camaras night and day.
Terrible advise. In some cases you have to lie to people to protect yourself. Because he is next door I would tell him that I have gotten some very serious family news and I am not in a position to be dating anyone right now. Or you have gotten some serious health news so you are going to suspend all dating (with anyone) to focus on personal care. Don’t get into “you don’t seem to understand I am not interested” with a nut job, that will frustrate them. Tell them something has come up in your life and for the time being you are giving up dating “and some other things” to focus on taking care of yourself. Make it about you, not him. Because he is right next door you in no way want to get on his bad side and in order to protect yourself, make something up.
A town priest asked the folks to stop parade and if not he will take strict action. After a few days, he called for a evening cold coffee party. He added to his speech "this year you folks are going for some special class. Here we have two monks clad in orange gowns...." You mean beggars..shouted a boy of 13.? Errr.her..grrr... The dramaa again. The end.
U know what speak of the devil I think my neihborhoes are trying to avoid me I mean the neighbor pointed at me and she made me feel very uncomfortable when she did that to me.
Just keep quiet and document things that they do and their smear campaigns and keep cameras up for your safety.
When u say the narcissit is your neighbor? How do u know?
Ummmmmm.....date a neighbour???....errrrrrrrrrrrrrrr