John Mulaney Stand-Up Monologue - SNL
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ก.พ. 2025
- Sixth-time host John Mulaney does stand-up about his kids, his parents and physical therapy.
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#SNL #SNL50 #JohnMulaney #ChappellRoan
How nice of John to show up at his barber shop and perform for us.
🤣🤣🤣
Baby J❤
Love this reference
haha funny CAN I GET A HAIRCUT???
@@turdmuffins88 he needed one too!!
I love that this guy blazed through a yearslong, wildly successful career while fully high and still managed to look barely over drinking age, then had two children in barely three years time and aged two decades. I never thought I'd see an old John Mulaney, but here we are. I'm so glad you made it, sir.
@@yvettevandermolen2455 🤣🤣🧓👴 Hilarious and true!
In fairness, he also watched his wife go through breast cancer.
and also looks like he got jaw and/or chin implants
So we all can see the implants in his jaw right
I noticed he looked mature finally. I think he looks super hot. I like him at age 42 (still looks 35).
"we tried everything including towel" LMFAOO
Ima go oldschool and everytime someone gets sick recommend them to try towel
@@LB-on8bsthat’s pretty
Much what anti-vaxxers do. “Screw modern medicine, We should try methods that they used back when measles and the common cold were death sentences”.
I thought that he was going to get back towel at the end where he was talking about his grandfather and being in rehab.
LOL
@@jpack85Ooo that would have been good
He finally hit puberty! It's only been like 30 years, good for you Tiger Mom!
he looks like he's transitioning into dennis quaid
@@dietotaku😂😂😂
No, that's all the drugs
that was disappointing. He just did his set. I've seen his set before. I know he has a new baby. He must be exhausted. Why didn't someone else write the monologue for him?
The tall child is DEFINITELY looking worse. STOP BURNING THE CANDLE ATBOTHENDS
anytime i watch a monologue, i like to pay attention to what makes the snl band laugh. at least in recent memory, this one saw the hardest i’ve seen maddy rice chuckle
Yeah, I always watch her, you can tell when she doesn’t approve of the host lol, she didn’t like Shane Gillis haha.
First SNL of the new season I’ve watched (largely because it had Mulaney hosting) and…..no James Genus on bass???? Doesn’t feel right.
@@shakespeare1599 James is on tour with Herbie Hancock but will be back soon.
@@jaredf6205 Ah, I had no idea - thanks for the info. But he’s a super talented dude so doesn’t surprise me. Good to know he’ll be back though.
Sometimes I wonder if it’s because they probably already heard the set?
Those high, feminine hips are getting back at him for all the smack he talked back in the day.
Noooo!!! That’s the thing he’s sensitive about!!!!
And all the smack he did yesterday
hipps don’t lie
@@jameshamilton1469 Hips are such vindictive bishes
52 and I have a torn hip labrum. I feel a kindred spirit in John.
"Mom fell." "I fell, it hurt!" 😂😂😂
That one hit a little too close. I had three hospice patient falls to follow up on yesterday, and add to that number four when I fell on my front porch heading out to go assess them! 💃
How very progressive for this tall Asian American woman to be married to a Chinese Vietnamese woman, have two kids together, and live with his in-law.
😂😂😂
I'm pretty sure John married so he could tell racist jokes and not feel bad about it. His appearance on Seth Meyers was just him pointing to his mother in law and then doing racist voices.
@@progidy7 The Tall Asian American woman part is referring to an older bit in one of Mulaney's stand-up specials where other children thought he might be Asian American as a child and how his voice made sound like he was a woman over the phone while he was growing up.
STOP normalizing racism against Asian Americans like the Covid attacks
haven't had high expectations for opening monologue these days. John met this low bar
my grandpa was a kid in the Great Depression and he doesnt buy shirts with logos on them because its free advertising and I kind of fuck with that
This is how to be fr
Damn respect to him
“I’m gonna get my hip replaced… and my mom’s gonna give me a ride home.”
I died
crazy how just a few years ago his bit was about not having kids and now it's all about his kids
I always think about his ex-wife in relation to that. Like did she want kids and just wanted to wait a bit but then he decided yeah no over this.
He just needed to find the right woman to cheat with 🙄
@@angi216 why does it piss you off to see someone happy?
@@angi216lest we forget he also has used both wives for racial/religious fodder, like the amount of Jewish jokes he made about his first wife and now Asian jokes about his second. It's lazy and doesn't bode well.
his stand up always had tons of bits about kids though, they were always his funniest
“He was too old for the oldest thing that happened” had me laughing so hard. This was my favorite episode, maybe of all time simply due to the amount of funny sketches and Chappell Roan
I could listen to this man's precisive enunciation all night long! 💐💜
GIANMARCO!
For real. His comedy is so clean, in a literature kind of way. Like, I almost expect a recitation to open or close out the act.
_It was the best of times; it was the worst of times._
“Dickens, my man, may I call you Charlie? Apparently, you’re still a tad confused about how it all works. It’s either one or the other. Uh-huh. I see. Are those three Christmas ghosts in the room with us right now?”
Ditto!
@@rex-racerYes! Also, he put on his reading glasses to show that time had passed...
@@rex-racer As a BA in English Lit, I feel comfortable outing Mulaney as a fellow BA in English Lit. Yes, I also am a Musical Theater major at heart, but like John, I'm aware that my musical abilities begin and end at "can carry a tune...?"
It's nice to see John looking so good and in a better place in his life
His face looks quite different. Did his jawline change?
His ex wife put up with years of his shit and got dumped.
is this sarcasm?
Jaw and/or chin surgery
He's clean and sober now and at a healthy weight. That's why his face looks a little different, plus getting older.
I’m always happy to see John Mulaney! He is one of the few people who can still make me giggle like a kid and I want him to be around until I am too old for everything!
John Mulaney looks like cocaine works as a puberty blocker.
He finally, truly quit, and then 2 years later finally grew into his adult body. Lol
nah fam he just got jaw implants
He's handsome
Same thing happened to Chevy chase, aged thirty years in two
I’m 1 of 9. Ages 18-41.
Literally 9 Catholic adults, just walking around.
Sounds like Catholics for Kamala.
Catholic fertility rates obviously haven't kept up with modern medicine. Glad you made it though!
Sounds like Catholics for Kamala.
I have 11 Catholic Cousins from one fam. Outlived both parents. All have their own kids except the oldest.
Thats so 1940s😭
"I just wish Grandpa were here"
There is never an age where you stop missing or needing your parents. Seeing your son go through this terrible time not being able to help him, and all John's dad wanted was his own dad
Years ago when I was in rehab, we talked about how much we admire John Mulany, a former drug addict like us turned sober famous comedian 👏 Happy to see him thrive 😀
When I weaned myself off of alcohol and drugs by myself at home I didn't think about famous addicts for inspiration, I thought about the few stories of regular people like myself who got sober and stayed that way. They are my inspiration. I don't even know some of their names. But I wish I could thank them and that they could get accolades for what they did. Instead, people only thank the famous ones.
Wishing the best for you too. I don't know what addiction is like but I know what feeling trapped by something is like. Anyway, best of luck to you
@@nadiamccall4311Good for you, but your tone is condescending. If thinking of famous people like John who got through it helped them, that's great.
he and Pete
His best material came from the days he was using.
"No one's looking for 9 new Catholic adults to just be walkin around" Such an unhinged but true line
Wow. I almost didn’t recognize him. To me, he’s always looked like a college freshman. This is the first time I’ve seen John Mulaney, where he actually looks close to his actual age. Not a criticism, just an observation.
It means he’s healthy
@@samfrank3999 Dunno man, he has the drug twitch in his left hand.
Buying a new face will do that for you.
@@exad0 no he’s just showing off his new wedding ring… I have to admit it was hard for me to hear him say, “My Wife!” and know that he wasn’t talking about Anna
@@CoachRudi1 I just discovered the reason men say 'My wife.." is because the phrases stay true even when they change out the woman.
Makes my heart happy to see Mulaney looking this well and thriving.
Salt and Pepper Diner is still one of the best sketches of all time
Definitely. We were lucky enough to see him in Chicago where he did the sketch in 2017. Epic.
That Willy Wonka & Chocolate Factory reference almost went over my head 😂
Please let Hader show up for a Stefan sketch
That would be ICONIC.
Why?
Yes! In fact, I'd like to see Bill Hader host.
Just realized Hader is with an Asian woman as well
No, but they brought Pete Davidson back for those weird musical sketches.
I waiting for him to say his grandpas advice would have been to stick a towel on his head and just shut the door 😂😂
"too old for the oldest thing that ever happened."
"he was born in 1902. That's a long time ago. even back then they knew that was a long time ago"
My Mormon grandma's grandma was one of 17 AND THEY ALL SURVIVED. No polygamist wives, no diseases, at that point you can field a baseball team... And their opponents!
Holy guacamole! That poor woman!
Religions do what they can to increase membership. Keep those tithes coming!
Your grandma’s grandma’s pelvic floor didn’t survive
I'm not a big SNL watcher but i ADORE John Mulaney! His monologue was spot on 🤭😅 not only is his delivery hysterical ,but his voice makes it that much better , all i see when he talks is his character on "Big Mouth" "Andrew Glouberman" 😂
Love that we're in John Mulaney's luxurious hair era
Luxurious wig era
@@bmichael1165 jealous
'...I was in a drug rehab facility'
'Heh heh'
It’s so great to see John looking so well, happy, with his own family and his career doing well again. Love can find a way.
Hell be back on the juice well get him back
@ why would you say something like that?! He has a family! Wish him well! You want him to risk his life and the wellbeing of his loved ones and go back to abusing substances so you can get, (checks notes) laughs. Screw you.
@ yup. Clowns entertain. Dont want to then dont be a clown. Simple
@@RumblesBettr who hurt you?
@ not drugs lol im not that weak
“You summummumbich!”
He stole that from Bernie Mac
Love you mulaney!!! Thanks for all the laughs...keep them coming and I sincerely hope you and Olivia and family live a long healthy happy lives....YOU ROCK!!
My grandfather was too young for WW1 and too old for WWII. My dad was a Nazi killer in US 88th mechanized recon troop in Italy. My mother a Naval officer. Mulaney is top notch talent. My Philippine Island wife is 4'9".
That’s an odd description of a WWII Allies soldier.🤨
Wtf where did you find that filipina giant
@@BullShark-i2zthis entire post is odd.
I don’t know what else to say but ok
@@beachpreachr1894i find it to be fascinating and quite wholesome
That was a good old stand-up. Fantastic
Really?
Nurses use that part of hand to insert neddle. Since old folks get stabbed there all the time they use fancy bandades to cover it.
What is this neddle? And the bandade.
*bandaid
It's giving Oh Hello. banDADE.
As an aging RN myself, collagen loss makes elderly skin thin and weak.
You’re welcome for wrecking the joke. It’s one of my many superpowers. 😉
BORING. John's explanation was funnier.
“Even back then they knew it was a long time ago” is Hall of Fame 😂
“I’m still doing wife jokes, just different wife jokes!”
Where does he say that ?
Can you imagine having him around all day? I bet he can turn a dental appointment visit into a virtual “stand up” routine. Oh hello😂
Hes nor funny
@@RumblesBettr Mick Jagger, is that you?
@@helenryan5217 yes
No cause he’s a cheater
@@RumblesBettr "NOT funny!" I thought so.
My great-grandma was born in 1913 and was 1 of 13, but 6 survived passed infancy.
My father was born in 1916 the youngest of 13 who all survived infancy and my mother was born in 1922 the youngest of 11 and all survived infancy. I'm the middle child of seven . I'm only 60 !!
@@Trampas39 your family reunions must be packed!
@jontraz5993 you'd think however most emigrated to the states or Australia.
The depression
World War 2
1947 establishment of the irish Republic
Birth of the modern era 1954
Civil rights
Moon landing
War in the North
The emergence of the tech years
IVF
The end of War in the North the good Friday agreement
Smart phones
Celtic Tiger years
The financial crisis
They saw it all
Gave my mother an iPad at 90 ..took to it easily
A father with vascular dementia receiving total care for free.
Family reunions are small myself and my brother and his small family.
@@Trampas39 i see! Yes, what a tumultuous experience to soak in all of that development. However I do think some adapt to swift changes easier through the years. My grandmother at 84 handles her PC as any kid today would.
@jontraz5993 good for her .
Love that
Wish her well and continued happiness
Dude I'm 55, it don't get better John...
John, if you ever doubt if you’re still be funny sober…. Don’t! You are a LEGEND ❤❤❤
“We tried everything including towel.” 😝
East Troy,WI native here. Wild to have my home town mentioned on snl.
Wth. He went from John Mulaney to Jaw Mu-liney.
Right!
John’s monologues always hit. Love that he keeps coming back! 6th time? Just a matter of time before he hits that 10 mark!
No, no they don't. The first one was fabulous, second one was great, seem to recall the third one was pretty good. It's been nothing but downhill since then.
I always base my enjoyment for the host monologue on how much the sax player enjoys the host monologue
'Nobody's looking for 9 new Catholic adults just walking around' lol
I love John Mulaney. From the first time I seen him hosting Saturday Night Live, I thought he was hilarious. I watched all of his standup comedy shows over and over again. The first time I seen him was in the headless horseman sketch on SNL, after that he became my favorite comedian. Love you John!
I love him I missed him 😭😭
He’s been a favorite of mine for YEARS! It’s good to see him happy and settled from what it seems!
He’s been a favorite of mine for YEARS! It’s good to see him happy and settled from what it seems!
His family probably misses him too.
@@traviso7810 oh my god stfu 😭😭😭 he got divorced we get it
Hard to do since he’s a 5 timer+1
"You hold this baked potato." Absolutely brilliant line.
All the love for John. Finally living life as it's meant to be, family and friends. Still working hard also though. Good stuff. Love to see it. The demons of certain substances catch to many of us off guard, we just need to be helpyful and supportive with people around you getting away from that. Words are one thing, words can feel useless(as an alcoholic myself). Being a person to take the time to hang out and give a person a time or reason to stay away from those things are much more effective. Words of support don't mean much sadly. it's a nice ... gratitude. But then that person goes back alone to their place and their mind, and gets about to using again. It's not monitoring them... it's just hanging out and giving a reason to do something else, something better, instead of delving into that pit alone.
I’m not normally a fan of his but I always watch his work, and I think this monologue was one I could get on board 1:33 with the whole thing. Looking forward to continuing to see his work expand. 😊
I love him I'm so glad he's doing excellent and he looks so healthy and He's still one of the funniest comedians ever
John, you probably won't see this, but you and I have the exact same sober date. Congrats on our over 4 years buddy. Friend sounded weird but so does buddy... Thumbs up.
THE GOAT!!!
Love it! This cold open was great!
Well, this monologue was as awkwardly hilarious as I expected it to be.
Ikrrr hahaha😂😂😂
Love the Fox Mulder cut.
It would have been dope if SNL had a cast member of the Saturday Night movie host. I am always super happy to see John Mulany though.
🤞
Movie sucked!
@@brooke8567 So?
John is a great stand-up I love his Netflix shows would love to see him live.
Nah
This monologue makes me feel like they only got him bc everyone else was busy. It just felt dated, like it was from 20 years ago
This was a Masterful monologue from start to finish. Not one misstep - everything hit.
2:09 Yeah Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory lives rent free in my head too.
I see John Mulaney, I click.
He always nails it outta the park. 😂😂😂
Trivia note: The 10th U.S. President John Tyler served from 1841 to 1845, & he had 15 children with 2 women (though some didn't survive to adulthood). Tyler had 1 of his sons when he was in his 70s, & that son had a son in his 70s, & that grandson of President Tyler is still alive today (180 years after Tyler left office).
That grandson also had an older brother that died in 2020.
And that child is you?
Well, get him on SNL
@@Chris-rg6nm no, it was Albert Einstein
The more you know. 🌈
My whole family is from East Troy, WI! Crazy thing to hear such a small town referenced on SNL!
Great delivery! John Mulaney is better than ever!
*My NEW wife
I don't think people refer to their second spouses as "NEW" that'd be weird...
Ah the magic of fillers and jaw implants.
Seriously! He looks RIDICULOUS.
@@Kinesiology411 yeah it’s Hollywood’s thing now for men. Look at Bradley Coopers transformation before and after Sniper/ a Star is Born
Wait, guys are doing this?
@ 100%. a lot of time is very subtle to add more definition to the jawline. In his case it’s VERY obvious
I remember this set, it was part of a longer set he did that I saw on New Years Eve 2023 in Phoenix. Glad I have a place to hear the jokes again
whoa, he married again and with 2 kids?? I remembered his specials about not wanting kids with his ex-wife 😂😂
He knocked up the mistress while he was still in rehab.
whoaa
Love this guy and everything he does!
He is always hilarious. Saw him in Bakersfield when he was honing his standup act after getting out of rehab. He was brilliant.
omg he tears it up! this guy is fantastic!
0:26 Good to see my red headed girlfriend again
Excuse you. That's my red hair girlfriend
Daniel Sloss was right: as soon as comedians have children, they stop being funny
Love John Mulaney
"mom fell" *I FELL!*
He’s back 😊🥹this gives me happiness ❤
I love this man.
That is one household chock-a-block with proud Asian-American women.
"I FELL!"😂😂😭😭
Wife Guy is back 🎉
When I see him all I can think about is how he treated Anna Tendler.
I agree after that I cringe
As a 41 year old comedian, it’s so lame and lazy to write jokes to make fun of Asian peoples height. Ha ha that’s so funny. I have never heard about this before. John Mulaney is so smart. 😅
As a 20yo unemployed student it's so lame and STUPID to be this petty over such a silly thing
o wow! someone is using a silly stereotype for comedy! something comedians are known for! .....if Jimmy O. had said something like that about his mom no one would bat an eye, shut up
So relatable, at 34 I have had medical bs going on, only recently was able to stop using a wheelchair, now I use a walker, and I do help my mom, but it's mainly for my own excercise 😂
I love John!
Saw him perform this exact bit at my school’s homecoming comedy show. Wild
Mulaney hits on all cylinders!!
Wow he killed it that was as hilarious as I remember him. Good for him I hope he gets a new special with this kind of material
Yeah Mulaney's still got it but I just want to give a quick little spotlight to the percussionist who steps out in the back right of the band the last five seconds before the endcard like the Phantom of the Opera and then starts beating a tambourine with a stick like it owes them money. I love you, thank you for your service.
This is such a John Mulaney thing to say.
😂😂😂
To be told he has Asian eyes as a child. To then turn around and have Asian kids.
Best opener ever!
Rolling 😂😂😂😂
I'm gonna be honest, he still CRUSHES skits, but his standup is feeling pedestrian these days. It's one of those things I can't quite pin point, but there is a magic he once had missing to me.
He dry ran this monologue at Dreamforce in September
His face looks so different
Seems like the drugs and recovery did a number on him.
@@KiwiandPixelHe doesn’t look bad, he just looks his age when he used to always look very boyish