How attachment influences self-image | Judy Ho | TEDxReno
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 พ.ค. 2024
- Negative thoughts often lead to self-sabotage, imposter syndrome, or unhealthy stress coping. Dr. Judy Ho, a neuropsychologist, professor and author explains why our brains lean towards negativity and offers strategies to boost productivity, joy, and resilience. She discusses how early attachment styles shape core beliefs and presents ten methods to foster positivity and healing. Dr. Judy Ho, Ph.D., ABPP, ABPdN, is a Clinical and Forensic Neuropsychologist, a tenured Associate Professor at Pepperdine University, and an author. Her books include "Stop Self-Sabotage" (HarperCollins, 2019), "I’ll Give it to Your Straight-ish" (Flashpoint, 2021), and "The New Rules of Attachment" (Hachette, 2024). Based in Manhattan Beach, CA, she specializes in neuropsychological assessments, appears as an expert on various media platforms, and conducts research to enhance mental health care. She integrates Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy in her practice and is a sought-after speaker for conferences and workshops. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
So proud of you, Judy! I am so lucky to be your sister and to be able to learn so much from your wisdom and insight. Your dedication to helping others on their journey of growth is beautiful to see.
Thank you so much sister for your support and I really do hope that people get something valuable out of this!
You guys are definitely successful siblings!
@@JudyHoPhD excellent talk! I am a neurologist and parent of two little ones. At what age does this neural network solidify? Another way to ask may be this: at what age is developing secure attachments most impactful? Age 0-2, 2-5, adolescence?
@@christopherstack176hi Dr. Christopher! Thanks so much for your question. The research would say first few years of life, with the first days to ages 4-5 being the most impactful. I’ve found that there are “waves” of impact as they grow older when they encounter life transitions, like going to school for the first time as a child, dating, moving out of the house etc., where their older attachment imprints come back up and sometimes reconfirmed through these new experiences where they must test out their self concept and their attachment scripts.
@@andrewmichieli1760thanks Andrew! My sister has a TEDx talk coming up actually at TEDxUCSD! It’s been so fun to be on this TEDx journey with her.
I am so proud and honored to have had you as my professor. You have taught me so much and continue to inspire and teach me. I am a better therapist because of you. Thank you for your support. You elevate the field of psychology.
Hi Russell! So kind of you to provide this wonderful feedback, and it's been so great to have you as my student! I appreciate the encouragement and will try and continue to help demystify mental illness and promote ideas for self-development that are practical and evidence-based.
"It is never too late to heal your insecure attachment" ♥️♥️♥️
Yes, it's never too late! Thanks for calling out that phrase!!
Excellent discussion on the impact of healthy vs unhealthy attachments. Empowering insights, and clear direction of how to help yourself grow. Judy- I’ve admired your intellect for years. Kudos to you for continuing to help people in meaningful ways.
Loni, thank you so much for this meaningful feedback! It’s my goal to give people clear ways to help themselves so that they know they can heal and be their very best. I admire you and all you do - thanks for stopping by to watch this video and share your thoughts!
Thank you for tuning in! Sharing my TEDx talk was a deeply personal journey, and I'd love to hear what resonated with you the most. Your likes, comments, and shares mean the world to me as we continue this conversation together for a better, more empowered you.
I will try my best to read every comment and respond, so feel free to post any questions you have about attachment, self-talk, and coping!
Lovely Dr. Judy 🎉 this talk really helps 🎉 thanks for sharing 🙂 I'm definitely going to follow your grate advice 🎉
Thanks so much Teresa for sharing. I am glad it is helpful and best of luck in your self development journey.
I love and accept myself.
Here here!!! Say it loud and proud!
I was riveted by every word, Judy. When you said "flip the script on your brain's operating system" and "its never too late to heal your insecure attachment wounds" I wanted to learn how. And, you showed the way! Thank you. Understanding that our "thoughts, behaviors, and feelings are all connected" and learning ways to listen to our inner child resonated deeply. You look great too!
Thank you Tracy for sharing your thoughts about this talk and for pulling out the phrases that made you want to take action! I appreciate this very thoughtful comment.
Judy thanks for doing an excellent podcast ! I found your extremely the valuable. It's good to know the different types of attachments that influence our thoughts and behaviors. I'm going for d b t and it helps to understand where's some of my issues come from.
So great to hear that this was valuable to you! Good luck in DBT - it's a great modality for building skills for emotion regulation!!
Judy, this is incredible!! Amazing job! So impressed by your words and your accomplishments!
Thank you so much for the very kind words! I really appreciate it!!
Just my opinion: first half of talk was ok, valid points, general info that widely known here and there. Then once Judy transitioned into attachment types, that's were the real talk began. How to heal and re-parent yourself with clear and simple (not easy though) steps. Thank you! This is profound and insightful.
Hi! Thanks for sharing your honest feedback! I’m so glad to hear that the attachment types and the reparenting strategies is what brought the most insight! Self talk is ubiquitous so I wanted to start with that piece first to then show how attachment styles is just as universal and where self talk stems from for everyone. Appreciate you leaving this comment and reparenting is definitely not easy but it’s doable with intention and breaking it down one step at a time!
Such powerful information and so beautifully said, thank you Dr. Judy! As a therapist, I am definitely passing your TEDx Talk on to everyone who needs to hear it.
Thank you Anita for passing along to your clients who might find this helpful!
Dr. Judy is one of America's (and the World's) greatest mental health experts. This TEDx talk is just more proof of her tremendous expertise and phenomenal communication skills. The discussion and statistics around over worrying is so revealing. The biggest message to me was around having a great - positive attachment and relationship with self. We have seen how pervasive and detrimental it is when individuals don't have a positive attachment to self. Thanks again Dr. Judy - you are awesome!
Doug, thank you so much for this phenomenal endorsement and your thoughtful comments means so much to me! Having a positive attachment and relationship to self is such an important part of quieting that negative self-critic and being able to have more balanced, realistic thoughts about who you are and what you believe you deserve in life. Thanks so much for all you do Doug, to promote mental health and wellness for all.
Judy- Was an honor to meet you at TEDx Reno and hear this fantastic talk!
Hi Dr. Rosmarin! Was so awesome to meet you and thanks for the kind feedback. I can’t wait to see your inspiring talk up on TEDx TH-cam soon.
Absolutely brilliant presentation! The speaker explained complex topics in an incredibly accessible and engaging manner, making learning effortless and enjoyable. Truly enlightening!
Thank you so much!!
Great discussion and very informative. We definitly get in our own way, which doesn't allow us to reach our full potential. Thank you for simplifying the topic of self sabotage, and providing simple solutions so we can get out of our own way.
Thank you so much for the kind encouragement and feedback - we all get in our own way sometimes and it's also up to us to get ourselves out of that if we can just recognize the patterns and know how worthy we all are - even with our mistakes and failings.
Wow!!! This incredible talk so succinctly encapsulates my lifelong journey!!! I may make this my morning prayer for next few weeks, so I can remember to do all of it!!
How wonderful, Sandy! Thanks for letting me know that this is encapsulating your lifelong journey, and good luck with those morning prayers - I hope this is helpful!
This talk is very insightful. Please make sure you listen to it.
Well done, Dr. Judy!! This was a fantastic talk
Thank you so much Dr. BCW! It means so much to have your positive feedback.
JUDY!! Awesome stuff. Was fantastic meeting you!! I’m so glad folks are watching your incredible insights!! ❤
Hi Marty! Thanks so much for the kind words and it was fantastic meeting you too!! I appreciate the support and can't wait to see your talk go live on TH-cam soon.
I very much enjoy and learn from Dr. Judy on MedCircle. She’s just fantastic and I always appreciate her tremendous work and commitment to helping others. Everyone would benefit from this talk. The more childhood trauma you have the louder and more cruel the negative self-talk can get. Pushing back as well as recognizing and healing attachment style is a critical part of that journey. Great talk! ❤️
Thanks for the thoughtful comments, and I am so grateful for this feedback. It is so true that childhood trauma can lead to more and more negative self-talk that cascades into affecting all the different areas of your life. Knowing that you can heal attachment is everything. And anyone can do it.
That’s what i needed to hear today 👏👏🙏🏼
So glad to hear this Yolanda, thanks for sharing!
Love it! Attachment explains so much of the human experience.
It really does and is foundational to all of us!
WOW! Thank you Dr. Judy for your constant help, support, and this wonderful TEDx talk which is the perfect introduction to your new book 'Attachment'. I hope a lot of people have an opportunity to see this TEDx talk and to read your books. I love that your work is always practical, empathetic and science based. You truly make the world a better place and provide healing to so many. Thank you!
Danny! Thanks for taking the time to provide such thoughtful and supportive feedback. It’s such a goal of mine to break down scientific information in ways that are digestible, practical and useful; so hearing this from you makes me so happy! Thank you for encouraging me and shouting out my work!
Great job, Judy!
Thank you so much Bret for the opportunity to speak at TEDx!
I saw this talk in person and wow - I came away realizing that changing our self-talk can change the world. Congrats Judy!
Thank you so much Alex for your support and these kind words! It was awesome to see you at TEDx and I can't WAIT to see your talk again when it goes live on TEDx TH-cam!
Judy-As always, you simply inspire me to be a better HUMAN! Your concise delivery of helping one to have more "secure attachment" and hence, offer more to other humans is REMARKABLE!! YOU are incredibly special, breaking down such complex concepts and being able to do this and help others!
Susan, thank you so much for your kind words. We all have the capacity to be better humans for ourselves and for one another. It means so much to me that you took the time to watch and to offer such a thoughtful analysis!
You are awesome! Loved meeting you at TEDx!!
Hi Jennifer!! Thanks so much for coming to TEDx and so glad you were there. Really appreciate the positive feedback!
Well from Melbourne in Australia, I just have to say, that was BRILLIANT! I'll suggest it often to the clients who come to me for counselling I know! Thank you!
Hi Louise in Melbourne! Thanks for letting me know that this is a useful tool for your clients in counseling! All the best.
We need more Ted talks from you Judy! This was so inspiring and motivating. 💜🙏🏼
Thank you so so much for the kind words! Giving this talk was such a wonderful experience and I'd love to do more in the future if the opportunity presents itself!
This line hit hard: "It all begins with a secure attachment to yourself." What an incredible, incredible talk! I love listening to you explain literally anything, and I'm so lucky to be able to work alongside you to shed light on this important, relevant topic and so many others!
Thank you so much Alyssa! I so appreciate our work together, and thank you for taking the time to watch this and to respond with your impressions.
This talk is absolutely amazing! It's a game-changer for anyone seeking to reclaim control over their mental chatter and lead a more fulfilling life. So insightful with so many practical tips!!!
Thanks so much Dr. Nita - your support means so much to me!
This video came out in just the right moment for me. Truly no coincidences. This is what I’m working on right now and my therapeutic goal is to become securely attached rather than my insecure attachment style (I feel like I’m all three and wondering if it changes depending on the person you are with…maybe that makes me disorganized). I know ppl say you have to love yourself before you can love someone else, but I really appreciate how the speaker said I need to have a secure attachment to myself first. That was much more palatable than the former statement. Thank you for your talk. You made the concept more digestible and understandable as well as being an excellent presenter. Looking forward to using these affirmations and techniques. Thank you!!!!
Thank you so much for this wonderful feedback and I am so glad to hear that you are working towards cultivating a secure attachment style. And yes, many people are blends of attachment styles rather than purely just one - which is not talked about often. Disorganized is not a combo of anxious and avoidant which is what I see a lot of pop culture attachment articles seem to state - rather, it's a unique attachment style predicated on a constant feeling of being in fight or flight and being more prone to nervous system dysregulation. So glad to hear that secure attachment to self (rather than self-love as a goal or statement) resonated with you. Let me know how these affirmations work out and best of luck in your self-development!
Amen, Dr. Judy!!! Love this woman! I found you here on TH-cam/Medcircle channel a few weeks ago and I’ve learned so much from you already! I appreciate you! Keep spreading wisdom and consciousness! God bless you! Thank you! 🙏💝✨
Hi Marian! So glad you found my work and that you’re finding this helpful! I appreciate the feedback and will continue to keep trying to put out helpful, practical info out there!
Congratulations on your Ted talk, Dr. Judy!
Thank you for the warm congratulations!!
ALWAYS great content from Dr. Judy. This is WELL WORTH the less than twenty minutes it will take you to watch.
Thank you Tommy, so glad to hear this was worth the watch and helpful!!
Amazing! This is such a valuable talk. I really enjoy Dr Judy’s work.
Thank you so much for the positive feedback!!
So happy I could watch this in person! Well said 🫶🏽
Thank you Trish!! I appreciate you and so happy I got to meet you in person and see your amazing talk and beautiful music.
currently on my healing journey and this really resonates with me. such an important talk!
Thanks so much for letting me know it is resonating!!!
I have been waiting for this TedTalk for a long time and it did not disappoint. Everyone should take 20 minutes out of their day to listen to this powerful message.
This was wonderful! Thank you for making this!!!
Thank you so much Erica!
Hi cousin, you are always amazing. Fascinating speech.
Thanks so much cousin! Appreciate you watching and the support!
Fascinating information. This helped me reflect on my parenting and looking at my grown children in search of my influence on them. Thank you for such knowledgeable insight.
Thank you so much for the kind words.
Everything you share is always so powerful! Loved watching and learning from you Judy!
Thank you so much Dr. Therese! It means so much to me that you watched and enjoyed.
YEA! Keep this amazing work flowing - thank you, Judy! ❤
Thank you Chase - I will! And you too!!! Keep the amazing work going.
Dr. Judy's authenticity is impeccable. The expertise and insight she shares on this subject highlights just how easily we develop hurtful self-talk and how it heavily influences our sense of self- and most importantly, she sheds light on how we can flip the script on the negative prose in our minds that keeps us stuck in this life. Thank you Dr. Judy!
Thank you so much Mandi for your insightful comments and yes, self-talk, sense of self, and how it relates to our attachment styles - these concepts are so inextricably linked it can be hard to untangle. My goal for this talk was to help shed light in a practical way that fosters practical action to heal!
This resonated with me on my own healing journey! Thank you for empowering me
Thank you so much for letting me know this helped you on your healing journey!
What a great talk! Thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much for watching!!
That was absolutely fantastic. Beautifully said. Thank you
How wonderful, thanks for this kind feedback!
Thank you so much 💗
Thank you for watching!
Great presentation! I think I have anxious attachment so I am going to be extra nice to myself and employ positive self statements every day! Just loved the reframing of these activities as reparenting ergo restructuring to improve our lives and well being! 👏👏👏
So well articulated regarding the complex development of self and a rational for
effective therapy. Can certainly see the influence of brain development (ABPdN) throughout
your talk. Thank you.
Thank you so much Steven for your thoughtful feedback! The self is indeed so complex in development but the good news is we can heal at any age and stage earlier emotional wounds and traumas. And yes! Shout out to neuropsychology and AAPdN for sure in aspects of this talk!
Thank you for doing this talk, @Judy. Always helpful and clarifying to hear from you.
Thanks so much for the positive feedback Liza!
Dang! Dr. Judy does it again! Thank you for explaining this and bringing your insight to the masses. Love, Dr. Judy!
Thank you so so much Kyle, for your kind words!
Beautiful ❤
We all deserve to care for our inner child!
Enlightening and relatable explanation of how attachment styles shape our self-image . Excellent practical tips provided for cultivating a healthier attachment and self-image. Thought-provoking and helpful - keep shining a light on these important psychological topics!
Thank you so much for the wonderful feedback Pablo, this means a lot to me.
An honor to know you Dr. Judy, what an inspiration to love ourselves in order to be healthy emotionally, mentally,physically and spirituality. Congrats on your new book!!!
Thank you so much for taking the time to watch and to provide your thoughtful comments, Scarlett! It’s an honor to know you too, and I’m grateful for you!
This women deserves more credit
Thanks for the kind words.
Most women do
Amazing talk Judy! So relevant for everything in life and also just a strong, self empowering message that we only need ourselves to improve our attachment style. Also always admire how you can explain complicated things in a simple way.
Thank you so much Paula, I so appreciate you watching and for your thoughtful feedback! I agree that it's so important to find ways to to create positive change and take action!
Judy Ho's advice is amazing!
Thank you so much!!
We agree!
@@tedxrenonv Thanks for choosing me to be part of TEDxReno class of 2024!
This was great, and I will use these tools.
Thank you so much for the kind words and I’m glad you found it helpful!
Enlightening
Thank you so much.
Wow. This was so insightful. I really needed this. Thank you so much for this! 🙏🏽
Thank you so much for the lovely feedback and hope this is helpful!!
Loved this talk so much! ❤ great insights valuable for anyone to implement. Fantastic job!
Resonates with me, especially more being a parent now
Yes! Parenting brings so many revelations!
Thank you for unlocking life secrets for me all my life! Go Bears and Tritons!
Go bears! Thank you Wayne for watching and for providing your positive feedback.
And Tritons too ;)
Brilliant! And so clearly explained!
Thanks so much for the kind feedback!
Amazing -I always look forward to your incredible insights. Congratulations!
Thank you Dr. Dom! I so appreciate your support and right back at you!
Judy you’re amazing! What an exceptional talk! Congrats!
Thank you so much Leslie!! This means so much to me.
Congrats Dr. Judy. Great Ted talk, so relatable, great advice for us self talkers. Dr. Judy always brings her best expertise and educates her audience when she has a platform to speak. And she’s very nice to work with too when booking her for special segments on live TV. Again, Congrats! Tish from CTV.
Thank you so much Tish for the very positive feedback and it’s always great to work with you!
Inspiring and practical talk! Made me more aware of my negative self-talk.
So glad it made you more aware and also that it was practical for you Joel!! Thanks for watching
Thank you Judy! I learned a lot today!
Thank you so much for sharing Kathy! I really appreciate you.
Judy is Fabulous! Great advice :D
Thank you so much!
This is an enlightening inspiring talk. Thank you for shining a light on our self talk and how to support ourselves better when we're struggling.
Judy is informative and insightful! Enjoyed this!
Thank you so much Suzy, glad you enjoyed!
Always love your work Judy! You deliver in such a warm & gentle yet clear/firm way. Thank you!
Always amazing insight and information. Appreciate your willingness to truly help change lives for the better. Thank you, Judy!
Thank you for watching and for this positive feedback Donna!!! So glad to know you and love keeping up with your work too.
I just had this conversation with my therapist last week!!! Thank you
Ah! Love that synergy. Self-talk is so ubiquitous to our h human experience.
I found this so interesting and insightful. Really helped me figure out some of my negative behaviors. Lots to think about!
Thank you so much! We all talk to ourselves so we might as well make it productive and helpful 😂
This talk was interesting, informative and easy to follow. The homework given at the end was a great tool that could benefit everyone. My favorite line was: no one knows you better than you and you have the unique wisdom of your lived experiences! Bravo, Dr. Judy! 👏🏽👏🏽
Ah! Thanks for shouting out your favorite line!! It’s so true though and we don’t give ourselves enough credit, right? I’m so glad to hear the talk was easy to follow and that you enjoyed the homework at the end!!
Fascinating and thought provoking! Thank you! ❤
Thank you so much for the kind feedback ❤❤
Thank you for sharing this Judy
Thank you for watching!
Great Talk. Important information.
Thanks so much
Very informative and helpful
Thank you very much!
Exactly what I needed to hear today . . . Thank you!
Thank you for the great feedback, I am so glad to hear it was helpful!
This is great practical advice. Thank you!
Thanks James! I think it's so important to try to translate it for daily use.
The best❤️
Thank you.
Fantastic, so interesting!
Thanks so much for checking it out Kurt, and can't wait to see your TEDx talk go live on TH-cam so I can see it again!
Well done and useful!
Thank you so much Robert, for the kind words and your support.
I am always impressed by the way in which you are able to communicate information in such an empathic manner. The synthesis of this research and the adaptability of it to the audience is what makes you an expert in this area! Thank you Judy for taking the time to share this with us.
Thanks so much Dr. Trevor! This is such positive feedback and it means the world!
Great talk on a great topic!
Thank you so much Tracey. Can’t wait to see your talk on TH-cam.
Powerful insights!
Thank you Stacy!!
I'm attached to this talk!
Healthy secure attachment you must have!
This is soooo good!
Thank you Reagan!
Congratulations, Judy! This talk was so amazing!!
Thank you so much Kaya for choosing me to speak at TEDx! Was such a wonderful experience for me.
Good talk. I'm only speaking from personal experience but sometimes insecurities can happen later due to averse life events even if you come from a loving supportive family.
Definitely. Most people's insecure attachment styles show up with early childhood experiences, but you can absolutely have later life experiences that are pivotal to shaping or revising your attachment styles as well. Thanks for sharing your experience - I'm sure it resonates with others!
Just as great as it was in person! 😊
Thank you so much Jackie!! I so appreciate your insights and for choosing me to be one of the speakers!
So good!!!
Incredible!!
Thanks Emma!!
This is such a great talk and super helpful to better understand these attachment types. Thanks so much! Will definitely recommend to others.
Dear Helen, thanks so much for your kind words about this talk and I’m glad you find it helpful to overview attachment styles. Appreciate you recommending to others! ❤