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Cinderella: Stop Blaming the Victim
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ก.ย. 2024
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Disney's Cinderella has gotten a lot of hate for giving girls a bad role model. But does the movie really deserve this hate? Dismissing Cinderella blames a victim of abuse for her situation and devalues stereotypically feminine traits like kindness, optimism and resourceful imagination.
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Not to mention that dress is probably the only thing for Cinderella has to remember her real mother, so that adds a whole other level to the trauma of it being torn apart.
It made me feel so pissed off! It made me want to rip their hair and claw their eyes out! Sorry for sounding violent, a little bit, but Everytime I saw that, I would get so pissed off, I would think of that
@Julie Walker ikr I hated the stepmother and step sisters for doing that
There's a song for that dress, it's called something like "The dress that my mother wore" but it was never being added into the movie. It could be much much depressing if they had added it :(
I've only watch the movie once and never dare to again (I meant the Disney ver) but I've watch 3 other version movies when I was in my teen years ago and they were lovely. But I'm always scared to watch because of the abuse and the dress being Ripp.
@@anar8343 That scene infuriated me when I watched it as a little girl. I wanted to fight those rotten sisters and help Cinderella.
The scene where Tremaine and her daughters destroy Cinderella's dress is probably the most difficult scene I've ever had to witness in a Disney film. Also, the fact that the pink dress that Cinderella wore actually belonged to *her late mother* makes this scene a million times more horrifying and heartbreaking to witness. Not only has she been brutalized and humiliated by this incident, but she probably lost the only memento she had of her mother. Think about how devastating and traumatic that must feel. She basically lost the only thing she could truly call hers. She lost the possession contained deep sentimental value, that evoked distant memories of warmth, love, security, and happiness. It's like a ship that has lost it's anchor. Personally if I were in her shoes, this experience would totally shatter my spirit.
stellatocca I watched Cinderella recently and u are so right that scene especially being older now was so hard to watch
stellatocca it's important to note that the dress is pink too, not only representing symbolic violence towards Cinderella and her mother, but assault on that which is feminine -- much like the critical misread of the narrative
@@l0us3rr so the dress she wears to the ball isn't feminine since it's not pink?
TCt83067695 Well, looking at the Disney Princess cannon historically, protagonists like Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and Cinderella are all kept down by pillars of the matriachy (whether that be the Evil Queen by way of the Wicked Witch, Maleficent and her dragon alter, or Lady Tremaine and her daughters). Cinderella ultimately ending up in blue represents her countering the oppressive matriarchy, this just so happens to be in a classic (admittedly limiting), damsel role when she ends up with the Prince. This is this misread. Cinderella still maintains agency. People mispercieve this idea. Same situation with Briar Rose, the three good fairies battle it out over whether Aurora should be represented in blue or pink and it's precisely this chaotic incident that leaves her vulnerable to Maleficent's helpers discovering her after 16 years of concealment. So, classically, blue is represented as symbolically portraying these feminine protagonists ultimately escaping from matriarichal oppression and tyranny.
The transformation from pink to blue also marks the shedding of conventional, or even stereotypical, expectations of femininity. & if that's isn't agency and self-determination for you, I don't know what is?
@@l0us3rr hmmm interesting
I think people miss the point of the film.
It's not about someone being saved by a man.
It is about someone escaping abuse.
THIS^^
yes, exactly
And she quite literally accidentally fell in love along the way. She didn't even realize the guy she danced with was the prince. She also didn't go to the ball for the prince. She just wanted to get out for once.
YESS COMPLETELY AND PERFECTLY SAID
factual information brought to you by: a random youtube commenter
"Cinderella" is a very accurate portrayal of what people who are abused go through.
People always say "why not just leave?" but they never ask the abuser, "why did you abuse?"
This is so true, we so often fail to hold the abuser responsible. Especially when they're female.
just a suggestion, it's true that saying this is hard to hear, to ask the victim why he doesn't act, but often it's the victim that we know and not the culprit and this culprit being dangerous, the person who wants to help can feel frightened too at the idea of having to interact with this person. it really depends on the character of the person who helps Also, I think it comes from the idea that the person who is a victim is reasonable and can be helped to reason compared to the abuser who, if he does this, already lacks some or all reason. Ideally I totally agree with you that we should ask the abuser directly but again it depends on the context and the mental state of both. Thank you for this comment it allowed me to think about it : )
Exactly! The victim is not responsible/accountable for what the abuser chose to do. How some can’t grasp that simple concept is beyond me.
I asked my self question: why not just leave?
You can, but not "just" leave.
Honestly, you have to be a very strong person to be abused your entire life but still, choose to be kind and optimistic. That, to me, sounds like real power.
I think it comes from not knowing a different path
@Dana Davison I don't believe in god but i never got into the abuse cycles i had to grow up with because what i felt first hand, i now understand more on others and i would never want to spread it like a disease.
Bébé Soleil yeah... it’s also really powerful when you stand up for yourself. Even more so, so...
It's not like her inner strength and resistance to abuse was very underlined though. It just looked like your good old kind and cute princess. It was stereotypical and was meant to be. Wasn't meant to fit 2020 standards, so it's understandable. While we can nowadays say wow she survived all of the abuse and was still that optimistic - it clearly wasn't made to be seen this way originally. The lasting effects of abuse weren't really known to the public or people simply didn't take much time to think about it. Nobody thought Cinderella should have had PTSD until recent public debate. She's optimistic and cute because that was the norm for a soon-to-be princess in a fairy tale. Saying she's a symbol of strength can be a thing but only to modern eyes - it certainly wasn't the authors intention, otherwise they would have underlined it more. Plus it's a children movie so it can't actually and realistically deal with how to withstand abuse. It theoretically can ofc but that wasn't the norm here and neither it is nowadays.
@@ipermaga4618 well it's a good comment. But i feel like you're just describing the conditions that lead to that, not what you think about it. But really it was very enjoyable to read and on the spot
Man. If someone that happy and optimistic after years of abuse, isn't considered strong, then I'm not really sure what strength is.
Agreed!
It is, indeed, hard to have Cinderella's traits these days. People don't need a reason to be cruel, so you gotta have to kill them with kindness.
well duh only weak people tell others they're weak. its a manipulative ploy to obtain power.
BlackJoe23 we should never forget that!
Indeed. How many victims of abusive parents become abusive themselves? It's those who work through their trauma and maintain a kind heart who are strong.
Also she doesnt internalize it. She doesn't believe she deserves to be treated this way. She is in a powerless position and yet she stays confident and practices quite resistance, while still keeping her gentle trusting nature, breaking the cycle of abuse
@Dana Davison ya said it
The old live action Cinderella movie Ever After (Drew Barrymore) really shows off the Disney cartoons Cinderellas enduring traits, she's strong, kind, brave and optimistic. In the Disney cartoon she never wavers on her core traits, it's really a beautiful story.
1.2k people want this to be heard
It's so true
@ huh? In what fade were they punished?
The sequels reveal another strength that’s undervalued: forgiveness.
Cinderella has no obligation to help Anastasia, but she does. She empathizes with her stepsister, who empathizes with her in turn. They both grew up under an abusive household, and now that Cinderella isn’t bearing the brunt of Tremaine’s abuse, it’s Anastasia who becomes the scapegoat.
Cinderella helps Anastasia not just because “she’s a hero and that’s what heroes do”, it’s because she understands pain and fear, and believes that no one should have to live like that.
Good interpretation
That's a wonderful point. I think she also sees potential for change, unlike the stepmother and drizella who remain virtually the same so Cinderella won't bother so much with them. She sees that Anastasia has genuine feelings for someone and can become a nicer person with a little help, plus Cinderella being happily in love wants others to find happiness in love too.
It's also heavily implied that Anastasia was forced into the role of scapegoat when Cinderella left and Drizella is the Golden Child.
empathize not emphasize
@@skurinski thanks, I’ll make the edit
As a victim of child abuse, Cinderella was so relatable to me.
Can't escape the abusive house? Check. Using imagination as a coping mechanism? Double check. A night out is just a delight with a taste of freedom? Check.
Are you ok now? If you need to talk I'm here and remember you are amazing
@@horse_stan6007 Not exactly. Thanks for the kind offer tho.
@@ashlynrose2464 ok just remember how amazing you are
@Amanda Lee I'm sorry. If you need emotional support I'm here💕
@Amanda Lee thank you ♥️ glad you have people to talk you! You can make it you're so strong! 💞
Another thing to consider is that Cinderella has been denied love and affection for most of her life, so we shouldn’t be so quick to attack her for ending up with the Prince at the end. People won’t look past the fact that he’s a male, instead of seeing him for what he is- the person who will finally give Cinderella the love and affection she was so cruelly denied for so many years. We should be happy for her, not attack her.
Couldn’t have said it better!
You're a gem 💖😭
I agree
Well said
Yeah there's nothing wrong with falling in love with a man and thinking of him as a path to freedom. As long as you don't let him control you.
It seems like people forget that gentle characteristics are powerful in their own special ways.
Wow, yes!!! Beautifully said!
Yes!!! Because it’s soo difficult to keep positive and gentle in situations where you want to unleash. It takes a lot if inner strength to keep composure and optimism in dire times
Exactly!
Yup
In many ways kindness is more difficult to portray and maintain than anything else. It’s easy to be mad and vengeful at your oppressors but not at all to show kindness.
Asking an abuse victim "Why didn't you just leave?" is like entering the afterlife, meeting someone who drowned, and asking them why they didn't just swim to the surface.
Your analogy makes sense. Abuse is complicated and not easily understood.
"Hey"
"Hi"
"You drowned right?"
"Yes"
"Why didn't you just swim to the surface?"
this is a perfect metaphor. i sure am going to use this
Great description. People ask the "why" question because they don´t have the whole picture. Like when someone is drowning.
its a valid question
You don’t need to wield a sword or kill someone to be a badass woman
Yess
or have super power
Also, a lot of people think that falling in love or showing emotions makes a character "weak" and tbh that's just sad.
Alice and wonderland the live action one wants to disagree (this is a joke)
Cinderella still be a retard. Why didn't she just poison all of their food and let the dog eat the cat?
Everyone: "Why didn't she just leave her abusive family? Huh? Huh?"
Me: "YOU try living in a family as abusive as that for 18 years, THEN come talk to me, okay?"
Two types of people watch Cinderella. One sees all of the difficult things she’s actually doing inwardly and understands how strong she is. The other doesn’t see any outward resistance and thinks she’s not doing anything. The first one is most of the world. The second is the privileged people of the world.
I also lived in a abusive family .... The main problem is that we don't even know that it's dysfunctional .... We think that it's normal and there's no way out ....
@@pheonix9821 that’s the worst part about abuse. Once you are in it, you start to think it’s normal. And also if you find the strength to talk to someone about it, you’ll hear things like “come on, it can’t be that bad.” “If everything was bad, why didn’t you say it before.”. People love to make others feel hopeless. The ones who don’t listen are just another type of abusers. It’s so easy to judge. “If he was beating you, then why didn’t you leave?” Oh well, maybe I couldn’t leave because he made me believe that I deserved it, that it was my fault.
But I have to say, seeing other people in the social media, talking about what abuse is and how it makes you feel like makes me happy, maybe someone who reads this realize their situation or maybe someone can find some empathy through these comments.
That’s something I would tell people who haven’t been abused at all in their life when they ask why didn’t you leave 😑 I would say, answer that question if you get abused if you think it’s that easy because it felt like it would never end so try it if it’s that simple even though it wasn’t my family it’s never simple to leave if you don’t think you have a reason to leave at all cuz I was like the this is fine meme 😑
One of the things that annoys me most about how people say Cinderella should "fight back" is that we literally have an example of what happens if her step-family even think she's rebelling. When Anastasia finds Gus under her teacup they all believe she put him there on purpose as a "practical joke" and her workload was tripled for the day as punishment. Sure, a witty remark might feel good in the moment, but ultimately it would put more work on Cinderella's already long list of chores.
And she did fight back when she gauged the risk worth the potential reward-e.g., going to the ball, breaking out of her room to meet the duke and try on the slipper.
I love Cinderella and have always defended her as a great role model but I never even thought of that! It’s true, goodness knows what they would do to her if a ‘practical joke’ is punished so severely.
Exactly.
Yup. It's probably for similar reasons why she kept refusing to let Bruno follow his dreams of chasing Lucifer, despite clearly empathizing with him, she didn't want him to get terrible punishment. Bruno probably suffered mistreatment right along with Cinderella, abusers like Lady Tremaine often include animals as targets. Like the video said, the moment Cinderella realized they could have a way out, she and the other animals "set him free," and it paid off for both of them.
I know right? What do people expect the abusers would do? Stand there mouth agape in awe or something? No. Just no. They’re called abusers for a reason. They would make her life even worse if she tries to fight back. Plus people forget that even if she did fight back, she would have no chance of winning at where she is at the start. She has no other family or friends to depend on. Wouldn’t you be afraid of losing your home and being left in a place you don’t know? How would she survive if she left her home? What about food and shelter? She doesn’t know how to hunt and she probably has no money and she’s been living as a servant most of her life. Why, oh why would you ever think of escaping when you know THATS what’s going to happen. I get it, it’s satisfying to see the the victim fight back at least once, but can people remember why they became a victim. Nobody goes down without a fight and Cinderella was in a tight corner with no protection or training. Would they fight back if three (keyword->) stronger people backed them up to a corner if they don’t know how to fight properly? I don’t think so. Compared to the modern “strong” female characters, Cinderella looks weak in the traditional way, but I know that Cinderella is just as strong as them and, dare I say, stronger in her own way.
"Why can't she stand up to her abuser?"
Has anyone actually stood up to their abuser because it's tough when you see your abuser as the bigger figure and it's a lot scarier too. You wish you can stand up to them but when the time comes, you can't.
Or when you do stand up to them, you end up beat up and worse than before. In the end, you learn to swallow your opinions not for the sake of submission but survival.
@@infjelphabasupporter8416 exactly
And if you feel like you can’t because of physical strength that’s impossible and when you don’t know that your being abused because I thought I didn’t have a reason to leave even though it was a highly good reason to leave I didn’t know it was wrong cuz some people made me feel like it was right including the person of course and because nobody stood up for me so that time it was stapled in my head that it’s right and I have to get used to it and that nobody cares and nobody would listen anyway or take my side so no you can’t stand up to abusers expectally if you don’t think it’s wrong and from lack of physical strength and from what you hear can make you not and also what people don’t do but emotional strength I have even though it doesn’t look like it cuz I have anger problems and cry easily but I don’t cry as often as I did as a kid but the fact that I never faught back and cry at all probably would suprised people I know maybe
Right, the abuser is the one making it hard, not only will they justify their actions, they would also try to guilt trip you for feeling the way you do about them. So, the abused can't just speak their mind even if they wanted to.
Why doesn't Cinderella just poison the food and give it to her stepmother and stepsisters?
I've always disliked the fact that people aren't very receptive of this kind of heroines. It's the edgier ones that get all the praise but for me, being vengeful is easy. It's so much harder to be kind and compassionate after you've suffered. This happens a lot in books too and it's frustrating that the likes of Cinderella get shit on most of the time...
FGV it’s interesting tho, that the truly kind people are the ones who’ve suffered the most
100% true.
@@jessefulton8841 God tests the ones He loves the most. To see if their love is true.
@@checkmattee222 What criteria did God used in judging one's true love? Does he even exist?
@@boysteacher3818 I believe He exists.
Also, Cinderella’s parents died when she was just a child, so Lady Tremaine had time to manipulate her into thinking she needed to stay at the household
She can't have left - she was an orphan with no parents or husband to support her. If she had left she'd have been destitute on the streets.
@@Luculencia Exactly! Everybody who bashes Cinderella isn't paying attention to the time period.
@Aiyaluna Yourke Property laws may have been different or the house could have been willed to Lady Tremaine.
Stop assuming things.
@Aiyaluna Yourke Cinderella is 19
@Aiyaluna Yourke I was referring to the "waiting to come of age" comment. She was of age/ marrying age in that time period..., but as you mentioned, during that period, you couldn't do much as a woman without being married.
To tell a victim of abuse, "You should have just left" is the most tone deaf response. Ever since I was little, I knew Cinderella was a strong, poised example of how to rise above your circumstances.
Exactly. You took the words out of my mouth. Thank you
Some People are weak though . Like when I see mothers not leaving an abusive household(if they have the opportunity) I find that selfish . What about the kids yk?
kyungsooisnotanegg 123 sometimes you don’t get you’re abused, sometimes you don’t have other choice - you don’t have money enough to keep yourself afloat with a kid, sometimes a husband is rich and influential and you have no real laws against domestic abuse and a woman can lose a child to this man after the court. Sometimes a woman herself comes from an abusive family with alcoholic dad and finds an abusive husband who is not alcoholic, and thinks that it’s better than she had and maybe she deserves it. Shut it.
I live in an abusive situation, I tried to run away once but I was found and taken back and it made it a hundred times worse at home but at the same time it made me meet my therapist which had helped a lot, I know it’s stupid but sometimes I feel like my therapist is my fairy god mother because she always tells me to stay strong because one day when I’m old enough I’ll be able to leave which is something that was hard to believe would ever happen before I met her😅
Dawn Corona I feel you, I tried to run away too and it made it worse but there was no therapist after....
"She was forced to value practicality over justice in order to survive."
Most people who watched Cinderella are not able to see this.
And this is another harsh truth about reality which we face in our lives sometimes.
I admit to being one of those people. When I watch a cartoon it's for entertainment not to strip it down and psychobabblanlyze(and yes I created that word-lol) it to pieces.
@@merceduslong4486 I do the same thing
She was in the 14th century. There WAS nowhere to go. Plus she was a WOMAN. Women weren't given jobs back then unless you want to be a maid or a seamstress... Ya know, what she was already DOING?? Women were trophies on the arms of men, homesteaders, doing laundry, sewing clothes, cleaning, cooking, and not to forget popping out babies.
She was isolated since she was a child, abused, and brought up to believe that she would get no better. When she went to the ball she wasn't looking for a literal prince charming. She just wanted one night. One night of freedom. THAT is all she asked for. Not marriage or even an escape.
There she was, outside of her family home, and she could leave but didn't. Not even when they tore apart her Mother's refurbished dress.
She understood perfectly well she had nowhere to go and the reality of her situation. But she DID end up catching the Prince's heart and got her happily ever after.
I think a lot of people forget these facts and look at it from a biased lens of the modern era or they have never been abused before. As someone raised in abuse myself I didn't know that my Father was being abusive until I met a friend who taught me that I deserved better. That it's not normal to have things thrown, be pinned to counters, or yelled at for tasks you were never informed you were supposed to do. I was constantly gaslight until I thought I was exaggerating everything or being hormonal like he told me. Love bombing would come after so it was easy to convince myself that I was exaggerating everything and blow things off.
It always ticks me off when people victim blame. So glad I came across this video.
@@merceduslong4486 that's fine, but it becomes a problem when people judge it for shallow reasons and pretend it's valid criticism. See: people saying Cinderella is an idiot for just not punching her abusers as if that's a possible choice
@@jostockton. it's a cartoon meant for entertainment purposes. Not like many of the WWII cartoons that were subject to various propaganda. However I will concede that I watched many things before allowing my kids to lest they carry a message I didn't want them to have.
For a long time, I had the idea that many of these old Disney Princesses were "saved" by a Prince that conveniently strolled by. That's all you heard from everyone around me. That became a topic of discussion of how toxic the Princess movies were. Until... I watched them again myself.
Many of these Princesses didn't even asked to be saved.
-Snow White: Already knew the Prince. Was going to be assassinated. STILL made the best of her situation. Not ONCE asked for the Prince to come get her.
-Briar Rose: Wanted to fall in love. Not be saved. She never had anything to worry about to begin with (since she wasn't told). Literally was going to be "assassinated" by Maleficent. Plus, even if she was saved by a Prince... last time I checked, you can't do sh*t in a 100 yr sleep.
-Cinderella: This video. And not ONCE did she ask for a Prince to save her. She literally just wanted to go to a Ball. A dance. Not a date.
I still scratch my head on where this "damsel in distress" idea came from. Why did I follow it when none of these women did to begin with? All of them made the best out of their situation in a kind, but daring way. Not waiting on a man.
Thank you for opening my eyes
Briar Rose is one of the most misunderstood disney princess too imo. None of the things that happened to her was her fault in any way since she had ZERO agency in her own story. Maleficent cursing her as a baby "could" be attributed to her parents for not inviting her, and merryweather for inciting maleficent (though this scary lady still is the one at fault ultimately). Aurora grew up as a peasant girl who, like other 16 year olds, want to feel romance because she's never talked to ANYONE that's not her aunts. Christ... I'd be lonely too. And then there's this really cute guy who she met and he's NICE so why not amirite?
But noooo, you're a princess. You actually have parents. We're not actually your aunts. OH, and you're cursed to sleep forever if your finger got pricked by a spindle before the end of your 16th bday, btw. Which is today lol. Oh oh, and that boy you met? Nah, you already have a fiancee. He might be ugly and rude who knows but you're going to marry him cause we're taking you away from this house you've lived in for 16 years yay!
Another thing about Briar Rose is that people keep saying she's a bad role model because she talks with stranger (Prince Phillip) when she met him in the forest. To be honest, they're not really strangers as they mentioned they've met in their dream before (although I don't know how is that supposed to be logical but hey, this is fairy tale anyway). Also, they're engaged and will end up together anyway in the end.
You know, that's a good question. Been wondering that myself.
Damsel in distress is a real trope, and the woman doesn’t have to ask to be saved for it to fall into that trope. Unfortunately sometimes people apply this criticism very shallowly to movies they probably haven’t seen in a long time.
And the fact that she thanks her fairy godmother for "everything" LONG before she has any idea that the prince is looking for her shows just how valuable even one night outside the abusive dynamic of her home was for her. This was "everything" long before she knew that her escape was more than a dream, because she got away and someone showed her that they considered her valuable.
Laura Stimpson It also shows her enormous capacity for kindness and being thankful for everything in your life. So many people walk around expecting the world and then take it for granted. People who have been through real struggles know to be thankful for everything, even the little things.
It shows that she just wanted a night off, a night to be a woman, to be seen as beautiful, to be seen as valuable and worth someone's time. After a life of abuse, it'd be a welcome break for her, and I have a feeling that even if she didn't meet the prince she would still have had a nice night.
I just got this comment to 1.1K an idk why but I feel so proud of that lmao
Can anyone please provide explanation on what the fairy godmother represents and why she only appeared before the ball after so long and never before?
@@kittenmimi5326 For the first question 4:34
As the second one, it is perhaps because of the dress. The one and only thing she had from her mother was torn right in front of her. At this point, wouldn't anybody want help after what they saw?
Cinderella's stepmother is scarier that what she seems. In most disney villian they have some kind of power or extra strenghts that makes them be feared while her stepmother has none and still is feared by her emotionally ang mentally. Thats some villian right there.
YES! She and Frollo from Notre Dame are the ones that stick out to me as way more menacing than others, just because their evilness is almost uncomfortably realistic.
The realness in her evil is what makes her so scary. While other villains are supernatural, an evil stepmother is someone that can be found in the real world and that's what makes her so scary. Kind of similar to how people actually despise Umbridge more than Voldemort himself in the Harry Potter series.
Feel that. I don't think most people have to worry about maniacal lions or evil dragons, but an abusive parent is a palpably real thing. It could happen to anyone, feminine, masculine, or otherwise
Mother Gothel also shows this type of villain. Shes scary because shes manipulative, not because of some power
Ashiee Bae - Someone I used to know was terrified of Gaston because he's too real for words. But Lady Germaine is much more sinister as her actions are more subtle. No one on the outside would ever believe Cinderella was abused. But it's a teeny bit more likely people would believe that Gaston hurt someone since he's so public with his behaviour.
Walt Disney’s own words about his first female protagonists: “Snow White was a kind simple little girl who believed in wishing and waiting for her Prince Charming to come along. Now Cinderella here was more practical. She believed in dreams all right but she also believed in doing something about them. When the Prince Charming didn’t happen to come along, she went right over to the palace and got him.” She dreamt of escape and when she did she discovered (or rediscovered since she did have better parents before her stepfamily) what love really is.
I love that
Yes Snow White was about luck and Cinderella was about hard work. Both of them had the same qualities. Snow White was kind to all along way the which helped her in the time of need and along with her charm but she didn’t have a clear goal or dream. Cinderella in return had a dream and she worked for it. It’s just the difference between go with the flow and reaching your goal and none of them are wrong
@@maddie6321 And, her kindness got her killed while Cinderella's got her saved. Snow White in general is simply a girl with genuine innocence, she was an orphan growing up and her kindness was all she had in order to make friends. Cinderella on the other hand, her kindness developed from comparing her parental figures to the way the step-family treats her, thus she goes out of her way to be kind simply because she acknowledges that that's the most decent thing to do for anyone. Snow White never had an idea of when to stop while Cinderella acknowledges where kindness is due, and their ages are probably a clear difference between their intelligence and naïveté.
@@user-wn3wv5bx5e Very true
@@user-wn3wv5bx5e Snow White while kind was also very naive, Cinderella by contrast while still kind at heart is fully aware of what her stepfamily are capable of.
“Cinderella never asked for a prince. She asked for a night off and a dress.” - Kiera Cass
To all survivors of abuse, I admire you for being strong- in kindness, in faith, in whatever way you were apart from the word’s centered definition. I pray you don’t listen to blames accusing you for enduring as long as you did nor the guilt of finally being free from your prison. ❤️
Joanna Mae Cepcon Thank you. :)
Thank you 😘😘
Thank you Joanna
People like you keep my faith in humanity alive. You prove that there are still people out there who genuinely care for others, bless you
Not everybody ends up ok. Some of us are thirsty for revenge.
Okay, first off never ONCE does Cinderella say, “I wish a prince would come and save me from this awful life.” Sis got a prince on her OWN!
Yeah they get her confused with snow white
@@dejstoney let me tell you a little video titled:"Walt vs Disney:artist vs technology"it defends walt's classic works from Beginning to end and Fascinating!(you should check it out.)
Yes!!!!!
this! cinderella wanted to go to the ball, the prince was just an added bonus. who'd pass up that?
Lesbian Amazon Sister I meannnnn, sis is kind and was serving looks, ofc she would get a boyfriend sooner or later. If it’s not the prince then I’ll still be someone who loves and appreciate her. These other hoes who are pressed, bitter and in distress could NEVER
I'm a man and ever since I was a kid, Cinderella was the most inspirational princess out of all for me. It baffles me that some people call her bland. Her frustrations, her getting angry at Lucifer and her attention to detail to even small things make her far from bland. She teaches perseverance, selflessness, forgiveness and kindness. To quote Brad Pitt at the Golden Globes, "if you see the chance to be kind to someone tomorrow, take it! I think we need it."
She is one of the truest princess inside and out
If only she got more screentime, lots of it was given to the mice
Which somehow only the mice talks
Agreed. It may be strange to some, but I've always identified a great deal with Cinderella.
@@kittenmimi5326 that's why I love the remake. The completely removed the annoying mice and gave the screentime to her
Walt Disney said he identified most with Cinderella. :)
See this is also something that isn’t mentioned enough. People assume Disney princesses are role models for *only girls* because the characters are female. But boys can also find inspiration in female characters and vice versa, because these values are human values, even if more commonly found or more emphasised in one gender than the other.
“If she’s being abused why didn’t she just leave?”
As someone who’s currently going through toxic parenting who knows nobody I can go to,you’re right,I should get a plane ticket to my home town,it was so easy for me to leave,cheers, mate.
“If a person’s house is sinking in the ocean…do you think they won’t just sell their houses and move?” 👺
-Bopeep Shabubble
Its been a year, are you doing ok?
@@PeachyPechx I’m good lol
Sending all the love you. I hope you heal. Stay strong ❤️
I relate so hard to your comment. There’s literally no one else I can go to if I left, meaning that I’d either be homeless and starve to death, or I just have to tolerate the emotional abuse until I’m old enough to leave for college
Also Prince Chatming probably took interest in Cinderella, because she didn't care about him being the prince, or that she didn't go to that line-up of girls all wanting to get with the prince. I think that's also an important point many people forget in the story.
And another point the remakes expands upon beautifully
True, she didn't even know that he was the prince. When she's going to leave, she said something along the lines of "I have to go, to.. to meet the prince" as an excuse. Then the prince was like "The prince? But I-"
She just fell in love with a man who happens to be a prince
@@sweet_rain8352 That sounds like me that didn't know underrated singers or idols that interested of woman who just got out to see the wonderful life outside the toxic household (trust me I'm like Cinderella, I'm scared I might cry like an idiot when I first time came to other countries that I really love so much than just my brother's home country. I've never been to Japan, Thailand, Korea, China and etc etc. My mom forbidden me traveling while my dad didn't. But he didn't stand up to his own spoiled daughter being abused at home which is me 😟 I'm terrified of everything and I was diagnosed with social anxiety since childhood. I was lonely because nobody likes me. When I first have friends, I have feelings for them but when it comes for relationship, I feel expressionless about it. I just don't know how girlfriend and boyfriend does 😕)
Yeah that's the story I lack being loved by everyone 😭
But then again, that's also the reason Gaston wanted to marry Belle
Accidentally, a little fight back becomes huge. Not great for my taste.
And also to add, the prince didn't marry Cinderella because she was pretty, he wanted Cinderella and no one but her to be his bride, when she didn't realize that he is the prince. He realized that, Cinderella loved him for who he is, not because he is the prince.
Right!! 😊😼👏👏🎉🎉🎉
Maybe because the Disney make Cinderella more Beautiful than other people so that why people think the prince just like her face ...but if we read the original story the most beautiful is Cinderella stepsister anatasia .. Cinderella just have a decent face but that's show the prince fall in love with Cinderella Not because her face
@@Zu11ianyasha2000 Really? I am pretty sure that in the original story Cinderella is also the most beautiful, only that her beauty is covered under the cinder/ash. There wasn't a name given to the stepsisters either. Anyway, the prince is attracted to her because the fairy godmother gives her the most beautiful and splendid gown which makes her the most outstanding girl in the room. I mean, 3 gowns of silver, gold and shining lights. How can the prince not dance with her, she attracts all attention when she walks into the room.
@@wisteriang9491 I think there are quite a few variations, but the appearances of the stepsisters are different in many of them and the most well-known version and its
renditions depict them as being physically unappealing to uphold the trope of ugly villains. In some versions, the stepsisters are very very pretty to juxtapose their unpretty personalities, and some don't really talk about facial beauty and just describe them as mean and well-dressed. The one thing that is universal is that the stepsisters are not kind to cinderella, being lazy or slobby or haughty to being downright cruel, and that cinderella herself is a bright and skilled person with at least decent looks.
I feel like the prince definately would have been drawn to Cinderella for her beauty and lovely dress, but I think he was also struck by the fact there was something different about her, something mysterious and vulnerable. When he first sees her, she looks a little lost and overwhelmed by the castle, despite looking like a royal herself. The king thinks the duke might know who she is presumably because he has a good memory for the townsfolk and/or other royalty but he doesn't recognise her so I think she's something of a mystery.
As the night went on, the prince would have also seen how beautiful a dancer she was, how charming and essentially a kind person Cinderella is and that would have helped him fall in love :)
Agreed. Cinderella doesn't have power armor. Doesn't need it. She wears something stronger: Compassion.
BenHopkins1000 Doesn't have power armor but has a magic fairy...
Will compassion protect her from raiders or ghouls?
BenHopkins1000 love this.
Ultimate bidoof: "Father I have learned compassion, but I already know four moves"
Rusty: "That's boring, forget that"
Ultimate bidoof: "It is forgotten, I would also like to learn thirst for vengeance"
Rusty: "That sounds cool, go for it."
True!!
"She escapes her abusive family to start a new one that will reflect her values and what a positive loving environment can be." This statement spoke volumes! I can truly relate...
My grandma calls my aunt “Cinderella” as an insult. I sent my aunt this video. She no longer feels insulted.
Maybe you need to show to the video to your grandma and tell her that bullying someone is wrong.
❤️
you should send the video to your grandma too, to show that she is the step mom LMAO
@@TameraJacobs agreed
I'm kind of the black sheep of my family. Bullied by my older siblings neglected and abused by my mother. I was never really wanted by her. by the time she actually decided she wanted me as a kid. she got pregnant again and that one became her baby, my baby sister. And then of course I was always the one that my mom's boyfriend's would do things to and i would tell. Which also got me in trouble. And out of all 5 of my mom's kids, I am number four. I'm the only one that shows her kindness and compassion as an adult. I've learn to forgive her for her mistakes when I was younger. And I've learn not to be a mom like she was. I swore I'd do everything the opposite she did and now I have 2 loving daughters. Who are kind and compassionate. So I can totally relate to this interpretation of Cinderella. The irony is all my in-laws see how my family still treats me and have tried to tell them to stop but my brother just won't quit. Which is why I don't speak to him unless I have to. 😁 Have a blessed day and be safe.
"The desire to oversimplify Cinderella as backward reflects a hidden disdain for femininity." I COMPLETELY agree with this take on Cinderella. I legit almost cried while watching this lol. Kindness and patience are not really valued characteristics. Cinderella was abused for most of her life and has to make friends with freaking animals to survive. She's a hero. It's like these days, the girl has to wield a sword or gun to be considered a good role model. Fighting has almost become a requirement for a "strong" female character. It's excellent that we now have female characters that can kick ass, but it also shows society values traditionally masculine traits more, like physical strength.
Same. Everyone wants girls to be ‘’bad bitches’’ or ‘’baddies’’. And when you’re not that way you’re basic and weak. It’s like being strong always defaults to having ‘’masculine’’ traits which is sexist itself. What if I’m not confrontational or fiesty? Am I not strong? As Taylor Swift said, I want to love glitter and stand up for the double standards that exist in our society, I wanna wear pink and tell you how I feel about politics.
@ Now down here in Florida that's changing. There are just as many men, who are man enough not to hit a woman, who are reporting physical abuse. And the women are being arrested instead. About 10 years ago a friend of mine he had a crazy girlfriend. And actually ended up going to jail because she went into the bathroom slammed her face into the sink and told the cops he hit her. Well he was released the next day. And when it went to court his friends went in and witnessed for him. And explained to the judge that she did that to herself in the bathroom. The judge dropped all charges against him and then had her charged with making a false report. And then another time they got into it and she tried that shit again. But this time the cops were onto it and arrested her instead.
This comment thread brought tears to my eyes.
This reminds me of how people call Ariel a Damsel in distress because Eric stabbed Ursala, yet Ariel saved Eric first.
@@Moonlitwatersofaqua Yeah
A man didn't rescue her, she rescued herself. She just coincidentally fell in love at the same time.
is godmother now "herself"?
We don't know what really happens maybe the prince turns her into his maid/sex slave and that is called "happily ever after" Her Mom died her Dad married an evil hag and let her abuse his actual daughter for years so who knows...her fairy godmother helped her though.
@@AnnaLVajda you know theres saquels to this movie rigth?
@@AnnaLVajda what are you talking about?
@@ijimenez1951 yes and in that sequel the prince had a personality. He and Cinderella actually love each other.
She's my favorite because of her strength and kindness. She reminds me of Miss Honey from Matilda. They both were quiet, kind, and forgiving. They were able to overcome their oppression with kindness and strong connection with others.
Oh, great comparison! Jennifer really does have her own Cinderella story in a way. Weird how everyone who's seen Matilda loves Miss Honey yet Cinderella gets so much hatred and mockery. I guess because Jennifer had the privilege to stand up to her abuser- but notice that only happens when Matilda is on her side and Jennifer is empowered enough to do it (which Cinderella didn't have the chance to do).
Which made me realize... Matilda is basically Jennifer's fairy godmother 😂
Damn.... I grew up in an abusive household and escaped when I married a man who provided an out for me. I hadn’t realized how much I’d been beating up on myself for being “rescued” like that until I watched this. This analysis was cathartic for me - thanks for making this.
Oh my god... I’m so sorry, but I’m very glad you’re out of that horrible nightmare. Also, congrats to you for finally finding peace. 💛
You deserve being "rescued" you know
Sending hugs & love ❤️
I am happy for you
exactly, i wasn't abused, but severely depressed when I met my husband. In a way, he "rescued" me as well.. I literally owe my life to him and there is nothing wrong with that
It’s true, Cinderella isn’t actually passive. She is willing to do everything in HER OWN power to escape. She does what she has to in order to survive. If she went against Lady Tremaine, she would have been thrown out of the house or beaten. In other versions of the story, the stepmother actually disfigures her. A lot of people don’t realize it, but people in abusive relationships can’t just leave. There are many different circumstances that prevent someone from leaving or fighting back. Cinderella is just doing her best to survive her circumstances.
Also historically in these times an unmarried woman stays with her family. To do otherwise calls for speculation and scandal. Unless you were left money, women usually married to survive.
Exactly.
In the Ever After version of Cinderella, she actually *is* beaten at one point for rebelling against her stepmother and stepsister (the movie shows the aftermath, not the scene itself).
Cinderella was my first favorite Disney princess because I was raised by abusive parents, I could unfortunately relate. Cinderella's story really gave me hope when I needed it most.
Just bc she's feminine doesn't mean she isn't strong. She stayed optimistic, hopeful, and kind despite being in an abusive household. If that ain't strong, I don't know what is.
yes
Yes! She didn't just marry a prince, she became a princess. and btw I stan too many groups too, but blackpink most of all ;)
Help I stan so many groups yes ma’am. Me too. I’m a servant in my own abusive house. I would love to rework the story. I too surrendered into my imaginary world (psychosis) I fucking started sobbing when the clip of Cinderella saying “they cant stop me from dreaming” someday I’ll make it to the ball.
Those same people who claim Cinderella isn't a good role model, are most probably ''feminists'' themselves. They probably don't realize what they are saying is pretty contradictory.
That's a great way to put it 🙂 I mean, it takes someone really strong to remain positive, kind, hopeful, and optimistic when you live in an abusive household
Wow. What an amazing take on a strong, misunderstood character. Some points I wanna add:
1. People need to understand the time period too. Imagine how hard it is to be a working woman during that era. Her parents are dead and her only family is the evil stepmother/step sisters who have wealth. If she was to rebel violently, she could get kicked to the streets, which could endanger her life. Critics are the unrealistic ones for not understanding the realistic thought-process of an abuse victim who has no where else to go.
2. I like your point about how people think Cinderella got lucky out of no where when she ACTUALLY worked for it. She's the one who feeds the animals, saves mice from the traps, SEWS THEM LITTLE CLOTHES, and cares for them. The person she is (kind, caring, gentle) is what made the animals love her and RETURN THAT KINDNESS WHEN SHE IS IN TROUBLE. This teaches kids to treat people the way you want to be treated. She's NOT weak when they help her escape the room. She is being helped by her friends because sometimes in life you can't do everything alone. She has always saved them so they are returning the favor.
This is an excellent message to young kids.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
Your comment is gold. I'm still waiting for my fortune to come, I'm lost.
@@Fee581 Ik this is cliche, but it’s so true: when you hit rock bottom, there is no where to go but up! Fortune does come but often it’s made. Best of luck
"Lady Tremane's act of breaking the slipper is her symbolic attempt to shatter Cinderella's dreams"
Well damn. That actually hurt my heart.
also now I understand why the glass slippers stayed glass. like they should have changed back to the pink heels or whatever she had at first.
Triumph over nepotism, despotism and slavery.
I can't be the only one, but the scene where Lady Tremane locks Cinderella up, especially the glare she gives......I scared the shit out of me even to this day!!!
Those eyes will haunt me till the day I die!!!
Daesung Mars Her symbolic and quite literal attempt... I like the original tale where she gets her eyes pecked out by birds in the end (and I believe the sisters cut off the their toes and parts of their feet to try to fit into the glass slipper as well). I'll admit it, I like some of the more gruesome things that were included in these original stories. I believe that the original ending of Cinderella is definitely appropriate and well-deserved. Anyway, Cheers!
When you think about it, Lady Tremaine is probably one of Disney's more unnerving villains, because people like her actually exist.
The fault is mostly in the way people interpret it. From what I see, Cinderella just wanted to take a break and go have fun at a party. She wasn't planning to seduce the Prince, unlike her step-sisters. The prince just happened to be enchanted with her by himself. I in fact aspire to be like Cinderella, with kindness and optimism.
yep. she didn’t even know she was dancing with the prince, and was shocked to find out it was him. of course she was enchanted by the prince loving her, but it’s okay for women to want to be loved
As a boy, there was a reason why I enjoyed watching Cinderella as a kid, hearing the stuff thrown at Cinderella as a adult, I thought it was something I was regretting, hearing this knowledgable video, it showed that I was right to know Cinderella was not weak all along.
+sajana Good for you. We need more people like that.
She never once even mentioned wanting to fall in love or get married
She just wanted to get out of there
I think the way these movies are reviewed in our age has a lot to do with internalised misogyny. We are taught that feminine traits are inferior to masculine ones and being masculine is the only way to be truly strong and successful (sadly masculinity IS indeed required to be successful in almost every career). So since princesses are unapologetically feminine they are automatically weak, little damsels in distress. If anything it’s the princes who have no personality at all. In traditional princess movies their characters are always dull, born into royalty and therefore entitled to “the girl”, What does that teach young boys? One of the reasons I love Mulan and Aladdin so much is that the male characters have developed personalities that are also realistic (as realistic as Disney movies get) as they are flawed, make mistakes and learn from them.
"If she's being abused why didn't she just leave?"
If you're drowning, why don't you just get out of the water?
Ugh I know right Cindrella may look weak but she's actually a strong person
Different times
These people have corrupted everything. Before these young "feminists" were even born, empowering characters like Cindrella were spreading the values of strength, freedom and liberty. Ech, I hate those who criticize Cindrella. I can't believe Emma Watson could be this shallow
If you’re on the streets, why don’t you just get a home?
@@saumyapandey7253 Trouble is a lot of "modern feminists" don't understand that feminism is actually just gender equality, not "girl power."
Imagine being abused since you were a literal child and people say "why don't you just leave"😭
And people tend to forget that this story was in the old days where women couldn't go to work, vote, get an education, get their own credit cards, have their own businesses, or just overall have the same independence as men. So she had very limited options
People often forget that Cinderella is actually quite progressive for the time because the 1950s were a VERY different time for women and society
THANK YOU. Like with I Love Lucy there are a lot of scenes that I think definitely would cause controversy even before the new wave of feminism but it extremely progressive for a show in the 1950s
@@nikkichehrazi The fact that she was married to a Cuban was a massive controversy on its own, lol
Knowing that the real tale was written in the end of the 15th century (~1695), it is progressive. Considering that Cinderella was a "bastard", or illigemate child to Lady Tremaine's eyes so her abusive behaviour towards Cinderella was considered normal and forgivable back then. Putting the illigimate child as the main character actually is progressive
Nikki Chehrazi Yeah I heard that she received a lot of criticism for not hiding the fact that she was pregnant and incorporating that into the show.
Yes, I believe that there were much less murders and rapes and maybe most of them lived out all their years.
As a victim of parental abuse, this interpretation is as liberating as any happy ending.
have u tried this hotline? 1-541-754-0110. I'm using it to heal and its awesome. It's based in the USA.
I’m sorry that happened to y’all🙏🏽❤️
Ikr!
same
I'm so glad you pointed out the modern disdain for stereotypical femininity. The ideas of strength being derived from stereotypes of masculinity are damaging, its damaging to assume that in order to be strong you have to resort to violence, aggression, self-serving attitudes to obtain justice. There are many ways you can be feminine and strong and it just further perpetuates that in order to be strong you have to resort to male characteristics whilst shaming the favorable and redeeming qualities that are associated with being female.
Well-said! Thanks for sharing.
Exactly, they claim to be supportive to all women but shame women who take a "traditional female" role. It's quite sad that they don't see they are just creating another standard for women to fit into instead of allowing women to make their own individual decisions.
I agree. There is a branch of feminist thinking that's really quite loud and obnoxious, and it also is really paradoxical. It espouses strongly that women being women for their own sake and choice is a problem. It truly isn't. I don't know where this hate of one's own identity rose from. I think it's because a lot of the people who espouse this don't like their identity, or can't be bothered to build a unique one, so they attack everyone else's, and again paradoxically, end up joining a multitude of people who share the same character as them in taking the low road, living lives of constant frustration and negativity because they are consumed by a need to make others be below them, but those who they would want to be placed below them the most are those who are the most self-assured and accepting of themselves, thus rendering themselves immune to being torn down.
Sabie XXX Yes, being a homemaker by choice is seriously sneered on by so many “feminists”
Micoke12 I think the problem with the argument of “woman’s choice” is that we still live in a very patriarchal society where girls growing up are conditioned and brought up to believe certain things are expected of them - so in the end, a woman’s “choice” is not even her actual choice but what life and society have primed her to believe and behave - because our society is still not equal and not everyone raises their girls the same way as they raise their boys, you are then still dealing with the issue that girls being brought up with different expectations aren’t really fully making their own choice because they’re still influenced by the things they are taught to believe by society or by their parents
If one were to look at how parenting is done, you will still find households treating their daughters very much differently from their sons - I see it very clearly in my own household - and it’s this still existing and sexist societal standard that very much muddles the concept of a woman’s choice - because is it really a woman’s choice or is the woman doing feminine things because that’s what society has taught girls to do?
Just look at the example of make ups - you don’t see men wearing make ups in a professional setting but a woman who don’t wear at least a bit of make up is then viewed by society at large as sloppy - a woman who doesn’t go into a party wearing dress and heels (feminine things) is considered undesirable - to this day sexist views are still pushed onto girls. Sure some women may enjoy make ups and wearing dresses and heels, but just as many wear them simply because that’s what is expected of them, because that’s what society expects and if you don’t fall in line then you become an outcast and your opportunities in life starts to fade. A choice is truly a choice when there isn’t any societal pressure behind the act itself, and right now it’s still not true.
Yes, perhaps this “feminist” push of girls taking on more masculine traits to be powerful is still a damaging thing but I believe it is a response to what society still is pushing into women and girls, so in order to offset that imbalance, you now have female characters who exhibit more masculine warrior traits to combat the image of women being weak damsels.
I think if society were to truly become more equal where girls don’t have expectations thrust upon them to behave a certain way or dress a certain way or get married at a certain age and have children and be mothers, you would see that people wouldn’t look upon girls taking feminine traits as necessarily not of choice when the pressure from society is no longer there
The fact that she didn't sink into depression or commit suicide is strength in itself. Traditional women were not weak. Tolerance and sacrifice are characteristic of great women. Whereas women abusing advantage and privilege are not. Cinderella is not a sexist story. I think Cinderella had more story development than Sleeping Beauty and Beauty and the Beast where the heroines were overshadowed by other minor characters.
Beauty and the Beast is a fantastic film and another one that the internet unfairly slanders. They accuse her of having Stockholm Syndrome even though she chose to stay in the castle and she left when the Beast told her to.
Sleeping Beauty is a snorefest though. I had to watch it in 20 minute segments
@@morbidsearch yeah but Cinderella live action had more story development than Beauty and the Beast so Emma Watson's comment was not good.
I'd argue that the different focuses are justified. Cinderella is, at its core, about the resilient victim of abuse; the story of a strong woman who is rewarded for her perseverance and kindness. Beauty and the Beast, at its core, is about how real love can be a driving force in becoming a better, more selfless version of yourself, your inner beauty being more important than your outer appearance. Belle *isn't* the focal character in that movie, while Cinderella is undoubtedly the centre of her film. To me, it makes total sense that Belle doesn't get all the attention, even though she is the point-of-view character.
Aurora...never mind, Aurora is boring.
@@sindrevangenrobberstad2889 Emma Watson turned down this role calling it irrelevant and sexist. But which is more memorable today?Cinderella (2015) or the copy-paste live-action Beauty and the Beast. Even Elle Fanning from Maleficent as a supporting actress had more character development. Of course, my original comments were about the Disney movies. Both the Disney and the live-action Cinderella were more inspirational. I know this because I live in a sexist world. So-called feminists can only target the weak spots and blame survivors who survived.
For centuries many women had handle in silence injustice and struggles, but they care and bring up their families.
“Why didn’t they just leave” said everyone ever who’s never been abused growing up
I've never been abused and even I know it's hard for someone who has been to just leave.
PrincessAdriGirl lmao
I've recently realized that the people who call Cinderella "weak" have zero idea how disempowering and demeaning it is to grow up with years of emotional abuse at the hands of a parent/parent figure. I didn't move out of my folks' house for good until a few months ago (my dad was the emotionally abusive one; my mom was more content to ignore it because it was "drama") and I've only started to realize how damaged I am from it to this day. Getting out is hard, recovery is harder, and I love Cinderella even more to this day, because it has a message of hope.
Yes. I also used to think so. But then later I read about abuse and abusers. Listened to those who had been abused. Earlier, I used to think that the people who get abused bring that shit to themselves. It was only after listening to their side, could I imagine their real powerlessness, their real plight and how abuse actually works. It was frightening and it brings tears to my eyes even as I type this reply comment.
@@KannyValentine Humans tend to blame victims of abusive behavior because we are socialized to believe that the world is a mostly just place where good things happen to good people & bad things happen to bad people. It's a complete falasy.
If something bad has happened to someone we want to believe we can somehow avoid the same fate by making the "correct" choices. It's why society often asks questions like "Was she drinking?", "Why did she go up to his apartment?" & "What was she wearing?". If we don't do the things she did, we can protect ourselves from getting raped. Not so. Rape is also a major problem in countries where women cannot drink, cannot be alone with men they aren't related to & wear clothing that covers everything but their eyes. We blame the victim of a crime more than the person committing said crime in so many instances.
We blame overweight people for being overweight. It doesn't matter that they are living in a completely different world then it was 30 years ago. Sugar (one of the most addictive substances to humans) is added to roughly 70% of things in a modern grocery store. There are over 60 different names for added sugar used on labels so you have to do hours of research to even attempt to avoid it. There are antibiotics, substances that have a negative effect on hormones & other harmful chemicals added to or sprayed on almost everything else. Companies can write whatever they want on the front of their package & none of that information has to be accurate. The only things they can't say is their product will treat/cure disease (Thanks Pharma lobby). The nutritional labels are legally allowed to be 25% off in the calorie counts so you could be eating at least 25% more than you think. Also the company makes those labels. They are not checked for accuracy unless there are complaints so they can damn near put whatever they want on that part &, if it seems like it might be right, the chance they will ever be investigated is slim. They could be putting double the calories in a package & we'd never know. The only parts they can't lie about are the ingredients used in the product. This is due to allergies & medication interactions because then the company could be found liable if someone dies from an allergic reaction to something they didn't put on the label. If you don't have a degree in nutrition, it takes hours & hours of research to get to the bottom of things & expecting each individual to do that when they are just trying to survive is ridiculous. That's why we are supposed to have regulations. It's easier to blame the person who is overweight, though. If we just eat "correctly", we think that won't happen to us. That is also an incorrect assumption. Things can always change.
Victim blaming is the result of fear & the human psychology leading to the misconception that the world is ultimately a mostly fair place. It is not. Life is messy. Many CEOs are awful people with no empathy but they have everything they want while treating their employees (the people who actually made that possible) like they are less than human & easily replaced. The more people realize that people don't get what they "deserve" based on their behavior, the less victim blaming we will see. I always want to tell people who believe this to put away the childish things now people, it's adulting time. Have a great day!
There is definetly a problem with modern society, when kindness, good will and perseverance are not seen as good traits for a role model.
@Sydney Chuang well how else could she have escaped? Keep in mind she lived in a time very different from ours it's not like she could get a job and move out. She had no other family to take her in or any friends (human friends) to help her. So really her only two options were wait until her step mother died (which meant the house would probably go to Drizella being Tremaine's eldest since I doubt she'd let Cinderella have it) or marry and leave.
Honestly if she fell in love with a commoner instead of a prince people probably wouldn't be complaining so much.
@Sydney Chuang "Why didn't she just leave?" You said while asking to an abused girl who had nothing. Always blaming the victim, am I right? You totally miss the point.
@Sydney Chuang That's how abused peoplr are, if you go sassy on them, they'll punish you for that. Also, she was not passive because she tried her best, you're basically shaming a victim for recieving help.
@Sydney Chuang so if an abused victim got safed by ther love interest, is depending on them? Sure...
@Sydney Chuang You basically said you hate her because she's "too passive". What she would do? Punch her only source of living? You're basically shaming her for acting like a normal human would act in an abuse family(actually, even doing the right thing in her case) because she COULDN'T do anything else. If she tried to escape, she would be punished for it, she HAD to get help from others and that happen to be a prince. Actually, it was the royal family in general that helped her based on the sequels of the movie and she did act more at her owm at them. (some even making her fight for herself more if you hate her so much).
Strong female characters don’t mean STRONG characters. She is a girly girl and that’s okay. She’s mentally and emotionally strong.
Exactly, she doesn’t need to have masculine traits in order for her to be strong
Yaaas
Bit men aren't they are objects who think psychical strength is tye best and when men show emotional strength they are called susie's.The straight which cinderella has should be in everyone then maybe toxic masculinity will not exist..Men need to show it too but unfortunately they might lack it..
Dont mean physically strong you mean, your comment seems like a woman's strong is not strong enough or strong at all
Love this.
I'm a 22 year old woman and I love Cinderella... She's one of my favorite princesses and I think it comes from the fact that I was bullied in high school, my bullies destroyed my self confidence and made me think that I wasn't good enough but I never stopped being nice and never tried to hurt them back (because that's not how you respond to bullying), so I see myself in Cinderella and I honestly hate the fact that she is seen as weak. If anything, she's the complete opposite!
And how did your bullies respond to your kindness? Did it help anyhow? I'm asking because I actually used to try to fight back and it always made things even worse, but I was much younger by then, in elementary school (7-10 yo), and also was told at home that I should defend myself. And that made going to school everyday trauma. So I wonder if acting differently would bring more success.
I hope you are okay now 💝
@@tosterka I wonder the same thing
Well, "I abuse others, because I was abused" is never an excuse anyway - someone who is not capable of abuse (by the way, some tries to underestimate it if it is "covert", yet, it is not at all. If someone cannot is not capable of foreseeing the results of their actions, which would cause someone hurt, damage or even worse, than that means they are dangerous), would never hurt or abuse.
@@tosterka It's not about them. It's about you. You can't change the way bullies treat you. You can only control how you respond to it, how you let it affect you. The bullies won't be there forever. One day, they'll be in the past and you'll have your whole life ahead of you.
What people who dismiss Cinderella as "weak" fail to realize is that what she endured and the positivity and hope she maintained in the presence of such abuse was the very _opposite_ of weak.
It is _easy_ to lose your temper and lash out or lose hope, give up on your dreams and blame the world, hate the world for the life you're living.
It is _hard_ to maintain the level of optimism and love and emotional strength Ella did, and still keep the compassion and beautiful heart she did to make and maintain friendships with others (the dog, the birds, the mice).
And it goes wholly unappreciated because it isn't a masculine way of handling things. Cinderella's hope, compassion and beautiful heart gained her strong allies who helped her gain her happy ending. She didn't just get it handed to her.
Even her Godmother was only manifested because of _her_ immense emotional strength in the face of mistreatment and abuse, and even then all Godmother did was give her a ride and a cute dress (which she'd have already had, if her stepsisters didn't attack her and rip it to shreds).
Even the Prince took notice of her, because she was kind, humble, honest and compassionate. She wasn't even looking for a man, or him, just a good time at the ball. But he was drawn to her, not the other way around. Cinderella had the kind of disposition that when good folk got to know her, they wanted to rally behind her. You don't just get that kind of support. You earn it. And that's what she did.
But I guess that's not "badass" enough for feminists, so she's weak.
I love this. I remember when I watched Cinderella as a child, the "love story" wasn't a focal point, to me. It was always about Cinderella and her circumstances and how compassionate and optimistic she remained even while being abused. The prince was a nice bonus, a means to escape her abusers, but going to the ball was a huge win for Cinderella even before she met him.
You were an intelligent child, then. I could not stop "ooh-aah"-ing at the pretty princesses for long enough to imbibe good lessons. 😅
Absolutely. Thanks for watching
The thing I got from this movie was that the bad parts in life don't last forever so be positive and always be kind to people and animals, not everyone in the world is out to get you like her step family was. That good thing comes to those who wait. She never sung about adventure and danger like some princess she misses the warmth and love her father provided and kept that part of him alive by being just that. She's probably the most realistic of all the princess. I don't like the tropes disney has now where you should want to abandon your family and responsibilities for some adventure and "rebel" against society to be able to amount to anything.
Also, the Prince was raised by an emotionally unstable, also probably abusive, single parent figure (the King), having to be the voice of peace and reason. His part in the movie is small, but it reflects how easy it is to miss the healthiest partner for you if you don't broaden your search to *all* the eligible potential.
I also like how it is made apparent that her single father was the source of emotional warmth and security, no the abuser. It was a movie with a message that those and these times need(ed).
I don't think they ever say the name of the prince in the movie (or at the very least I don't remember his name), it proves that he isn't that important.
When I was young I always admired how she treats animals so well. They were her main allies and it was beautiful. And her morning routine is amazing to watch. It shows how she enjoys the little things in life despite the horrible situation she is living in.
It's because those things are all the joy she can have. No matter how little it is, it's huge for someone who has nothing. Those little things are her dreams are what save her life day to day
Honestly I feel ashamed that I didn't like the movie. When I was little I always thought that she was too weak and that the movie was too much of "the prince saves the day". I never saw the abusive side of the whole thing and I regret it. Yeah sassy charecter are coll but sassy is
Exactly. Because if that were me, I don’t care how lonely or isolated I am, I’m setting traps out to exterminate mice and rats. Lol. Cinderella is literally a saint. She is one my favorite princesses.
I actually always thought she was a pretty sarcastic and cool princess! She‘s absolutely not just accepting what she is going through. I doubt a lot of real people would be as optimistic AND strong in her situation. Men or women. And you can definitely be both, it‘s not naive to be soft and nice in the face of adversity, it‘s actually a lot harder than being bitter
i agree. my husband is quite bitter. he was physically and emotionally and mentally abused by his mom, yet is a tender loving father who knows what happened to him was wrong. BUT He's still VERY bitter & doesn't trust easily. Myself, on the other hand, dealt with emotional abuse (and some neglect by my father) and don't trust my HUSBAND sometimes, but trust others more easily because i give the benefit of the doubt a lot. My husband calls ME naive, seeing as I'm always an optimist and always try to believe another's words until i see evidence to the contrary. I'm also the dreamer type and have overcome odds on my own without needing a helping hand... He also seems to think i'm TOO emotionally connected and empathetic and compassionate - which i told him i LIKE about myself. that at least i feel those things, acknowledge them, and am not afraid to confront & feel them completely.
I always connected with Cinderella the most as a kid. after all, she did end the dance at midnight with "But what about the PRINCE? I haven't met the PRINCE?" and so didn't realize she was already with him. How could she be so "OOOO the prince!! GOODY" if she didn't even KNOW she was with him? So yeah, the sarcasm i DEFINITELY saw. The way she'd talk back to the sisters & the step mom weren't cowering victim, that's for sure. She'd have to bite her tongue now & again actually. So I AGREE
ibkristykat I understand and agree, I think there‘s always going to be some problems and compromises when you dedicate yourself to another person, because we‘re all different and come with our very personal baggage, but that‘s okay. We all deserve to be ourselves with all our good and difficult sides. As long as no one is abusive or dishonest I think as long as you make sure your communication is good, it‘s perfectly fine to have some clashing points when you’re together with someone. I hope you ARE happy though? I wish you all the best 🌸
Zu Zu - we've come a long way in our own lives, together. We've been together since 2002, and married since 2008. Doesn't mean we both didn't have growing up to do, and he has less 'leeway' he gives because of the crap deal he was handed while *He* was growing up. I'm an optimist and he's a pessimist. Our core values and beliefs hold us together despite our personalities also being a bit clashy (I come off ... bitchy? lol sometimes, not all the time. he comes off as a know-it-all and a jerk at times. other times he knows when to shut up just to avoid an argument, other times he digs his heels in & says his piece even if it wasn't asked for. you'll have that though. lol) Seeing as we come together in the end, and he cares about my "bedroom" experience (ahem) more than 90% of men (at least according to stereotypes, and also according to my husband too) and have gone through a LOT together, i'm happy. it could be 1000 times worse :) It's all good.
@@ibkristykat i hope you have a happy life
I always thought she had the most backbone out of all the Classic Disney Princesses. There are examples throughout the early parts of the movie, but no one ever mentions them.
It always annoys me when people display femininity as weakness
And when those same people think girls taking on masculine traits is feminist.
I never thought she was weak. She went out and got herself the best man in town. He didn’t rescue her.
Facts
Nothing to see here. Move along. And she wasn’t even planning to try to seduce him but her sisters were
Let's not forget: she did it a second time in Cinderella 3
Yup
same.. she was abused snuck out despite having a chance of getting in trouble prince falls in love with her she ends up accepting wich frankly who wouldn't he's the richest guy around there so like you'd be stupid to not accept that XD
When you break it down like that it's actually pretty realistic. Most people who escape abuse, or overcome adversity in general, manage to do so by building a network of support.
That’s true, for me I got that at the end of it because my parents finally saw it happen so they were able to tell me that it’s wrong and not right pretty much cuz I didn’t know it was wrong somehow and ontop of that one of my teachers let me be in her room for study hall so I would feel comfortable
The people that hate on Cinderella have no idea what It's like to be manipulated and abused. You can't just stand up for yourself, it takes time.
Truth! 🙌🏾
Time and patience def go hand in hand. Whether or not that time will come to stand up for yourself and having the patience to wait for that time to come to do so. That’s what I love about Cinderella. Although she didn’t know when the time was gonna come the amount of patience she had was so admirable.
I was bullied when I was a child (Is it counted as abuse?). I was too scared to defend myself or tell to teacher, and when I changed the school it took time from me to trust people again. When I heard feminazis saying how bad rolemodel Cinderella is to young girls, I started to hate her and also feel ashamed of myself. Thanks to this video I found 3 years ago, I nowadays look at Cinderella's character in a new way.
@@tultsi93 went through the same which also makes me cry when they ripped cinderella's dress...I don't uunderstand why people blame us cuz it's really hard and they never understood what it feels to be shunned upon and repressed when standing up for yourself and you second-guess everytime u sleep wondering if you are enough for protecting yourself and need processing to forgive yourself for not defending youself which maked anxiety worse if I always second-guess to make decisions if I really deserve to forgive myself or not..Battlng ocd,i sometimes battle with my mind to do some "productive things" to forget such anxiety
@@tultsi93 bullying is also abuse..
Seeing Cinderella through this lens has the same energy to me as hearing about how abused children all over the US looked forward to Mr. Rogers on PBS every week because he was the only adult in their lives who made them feel safe and loved. That shocked me as I, though a diehard fan of Mr. Rogers growing up, had never thought of him in that light. To me, Mr. Rogers was one of many caring adults in my life. But hearing what he meant and means to so many children and adults who depended on him for that half hour of kindness gave that children's TV show a depth I never knew it had.
Same with Cinderella. To a feminist who has never suffered abuse, Cinderella might seem like a weak woman who longed for a husband to free her from her abusers. But to individuals who have suffered abuse, who are suffering abuse, what a powerhouse of hope, courage, vindication, and perseverance of kindness in the face of evil Cinderella is.
Isn't it the definition of privilege to see things only from your own point a view and preach from that same point of view as if we all ought to share it? Well, there are none on the planet more privileged than modern American feminists. Thank you for this video. Amazing message.
well there are none on the planet more HATED FEARED DESPISED RESENTED DETESTED MISUNDERSTOOD BASHED HARASSED ASSAULTED ATTACKED TARGETED than modern American feminists wanting EQUALITY GENDER EQUALITY WOMEN'S HUMAN RIGHTS EMPOWERMENT OF WOMEN AND CHILDREN/GIRLS bcuz of the CENTURIES of oppression mistreatment abuse discrimination sexist deprivation domination terrorization and crap
Excellent comment.
Amazing comment, this is actually true for me, cause i don't live in the best family situation and she is my comfort character
It also says that abusive people aren’t always men which is a lesson for today as well
Anvi Srivastava yes girl.
Yes. Her step-mother treated her really poorly. And guess what? She wasn't an empowered man.
👏👌
Absolutely, but what's even more important to me is the portrayal in media that a mother can abuse a child and not just a partner.
Exactly, they always make it seem like all men= bad and women= good
I've been told all my life that the world is going to "eat me alive" since I try to be kind and forgiving. I've had dozens of people over the years try to coach me to be more assertive, more dominant, more like them. Well guess what? Most of those people are perpetually unhappy, and I absolutely love my life. I feel like the luckiest person in the world over how my life turned out, and I don't have hatred for a single person poisoning my soul and leaching that happiness away.
WOW sounds to me like you must be a good role model
Same here for me
Same here, but I still think it’s important to stand up for yourself, just in a nice way.
you can be kind and forgiving and still be assertive though. there's nothing wrong with being assertive so let's not hate on that either.
You should always learn how to say no, but it’s great to be kind.
People be like: “SHEs An aDulT!!!! ShE CAn lEAve AnY tImE!!!”
Yeah but where tf she gonna go? She’s gonna end up hungry on the streets
Apparently, She's 19 years old, also o agree she had no choice
Then it would be "Oliver!" but from Nancy's POV and without Sykes.
@@despinasgarden.4100
Exactly, then you have to consider this film is depicting an era where women couldn't get a job easily.
@@kensigregory361 Right. What options would she have? This was an era when a woman was either a daughter or a wife. Outside of those, what choices were there? Getting by for a pittance on a seamstress' pay? Entering domestic service somewhere else, where there might be a man in the household who thought it was his right to help himself to her? Cinderella probably felt the devil she knew was better than the devil she didn't.
@@jenniferschillig3768
Exactly. If I were a woman in that time period I'd rather stay where I'm accustomed to as well, rather than work for someone who can be much worse. Many feminist extremists should think twice before they bash Cinderella's actions.
As a past victim of abuse I totally get why she couldn’t fight back.
Me too 😅
As many years as our family scapegoat. My cousin implied it was my fault. “You should have fought back!” I replied, “it’s my family I shouldn’t have to.”
The scene where they rip her dress to shreds is doubly wrenching when you remember that it was her *mother's* dress. Probably the only thing she had of hers.
watching that scene when i was a child really hurt me.
Omg i never realised that!
@@user-wt7kh2yz1x For real tho. It got such a visceral reaction from me at that age and I still feel dread watching it now.
OMG I didn’t know that. Makes it even more heartbreaking. It was already sad because her animal friends put so much work into completing what she started. Cinderella’s joy when she comes down the stairs is so contagious that you really don’t want to see the other shoe drop. There’s a reason why it was Disney’s favorite fairy tale.
No she made that dress with the birds and moose
When she said, "Through it all, she remained ever gentle and kind, for with each dawn she found new hope that someday, her dreams of happiness would come true" … I felt that
My mom had a very Cinderella-like story, in fact as a kid, I noticed that Cinderella looked like my mom if she was drawn in that style. She experienced a time being of down on her luck for at least three years. She and my dad divorced, my dad tried everything he could to financially cripple her and take full custody of my older brother and I purely out of spite, she had to live on state benefits for a time, but still retained majority custody of my brother and I, and had to clean other peoples' houses to make ends meet even while she attended nursing school. Three years later when she met the man who would later become my stepdad, it was like the turning point akin to Cinderella going to the Ball, and when she did become a nurse, her dream did come true and she achieved that herself. Like Cinderella she too was kind, compassionate, but still strong and patient with a strength from within, so that's why I never gave this version of Cinderella any hate like most people have.
what a goddess
Heck that's beautiful
i'm not crying, you're crying!
Same! My mom was adopted into a household of abusive female relatives and her optimism, perseverance, and sheer determination to rise above adversity absolutely cement her as the strongest woman I know. Victim is the last word I'd associate with her or Cinderella.
i'm so inspired :)
I was watching "Tropical Rouge Pretty Cure", a magical-girl anime aimed towards children, and a character from there said something like "The Fairy Godmother gave her the dress, but it was Cinderella who sat in the carriage and went to the ball." I found this an interesting moral too. Close people can help, but it's you who should do the big step forward.
I love Precure too
Finally 🙄 why does everyone feel the need to trash the classics cause it is not “modern.” I always admired Cinderella and understood that her agency was limited in some ways because circumstances. Any male character in her place would show similar characteristics, she’s not a push over .
👏
Also, they forget that this was set in a time period where women had very little to no authority. So for Cinderella, being able to eat a warm meal and having a roof on her head was better than wandering out in a world of uncertainties and dangers
wings of a butterfly I don’t think there would be much of a difference in the story at all, if Cinderella were a boy instead of a girl. The power imbalance between her and her family isn’t rooted in physical strength but sociological uncertainties and lack of resources.
Taking it one further and gender-bending all the main roles (stepfather instead of stepmother, stepbrothers instead of stepsisters, a princess instead of a prince), the story would play out in the exact same way with the possibly exception of Male Cinderella’s escapist fantasy-he’d probably be less interested in dressing nice and dancing, so his ideal night off would take on a different look.
Cinderella is ultimately rewarded by the prince that comes to save her. Yes, it's not without the merits of her character and agency like Snow White, but in the end she asked for a pretty dress and a night off and caught the attention of a powerful man that chased till he got her. We cannot ignore the gendered messaging. Perhaps as an adult we can do all these smart analyses about how the fairy godmother is a manifestation of her will, etc etc. But for the kids watching, Cinderella is so kind and beautiful that she is delivered from her problems; that is a key aspect of the Disney princess archetype and you will hardly see the reverse represented. Aladdin's happy ending is with Jasmine, but even in that he is saving her. Kindness is a valid coping strategy but without the reciprocal kindness of others and her beauty stunning the Prince, she'd have rotted away in her kindness.
wings of a butterfly, in the 19th century, women could be thrown in to an asylum for masterbating and learning things that the male gender would learn in school.
While everyone has free will and is ultimately in charge of their actions, women did not always have authority.
The prince didn't save her, it was her animal friends and fairy godmother
Hmm do you think fairy godmother is another being or a manifestation of something within cinderella? And why does she only appear at that time?
Her Fairy Godmother and Animal Friends most likely if not most DEFINITELY would've Never bothered to help her if it wasn't for her kindness perseverance optimism hopefulness patience
and what not
@@kittenmimi5326 because she sees that Cinderella is a good person and doesn't deserve what was happening to her
Melonpan and Mona Bohamad2 YES this is what I have been trying to tell people forever!!!
She herself saved herself. Even though her stepsisters brutally assaulted her just moments before and she suffered severe abuse since childhood, she still had courage to defy them for what she desired!! It was ultimately her own choice and act of bravery that became her saving grace.
I feel like there’s a war on traditional female traits and being strong at the same time. A woman can be womanly and femenine and be strong at the same time, she’s doesn’t need to be “boyish" to be strong.
Yup I agree with this
Exactly!!!
The hatred for feminine traits is nothing but internalized misogyny.
Couldn't have said it better 👏🏼👏🏼
I think it has to do with the lack of active models for girls and the fact of take the abuse and just be happy later on as if what happend was nothing.
The only character i identified the most with was Mulan. I don't know how to describe it, but it feels so good to see a protagonist you can identify with. And then being aware of the lack of them, makes me thanks that i live un this era.
“Why didn’t she/you leave?!” is said to every victim who’s been abused by a family or partner. Easier said than done.
the 2015 version does answer that it's still her home and she does have obligations to her late parents to care for the home and place they built for themselves. Check out Heroes of Olympus, where Ogyia is Calypso's prison that she's magically bound to stay in, but at the same time it's her comfy home which she refuses to let Gaea destroy.
She might not be my favorite princess, but this analysis definitely makes me respect her more.
I’m sorry I called you anti-feminist, Cinderella.
WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TO INSULT CINDERELLA?
@@latrolettteeeeeee chill out :V, she's willing to changer no one is perfect :>
La_Trolette relax....seriously
@@latrolettteeeeeee who the hell is carrie white and also please respect ppl's opinions on stuff
@@toku3469 Just the fact that you don't know who Carrie is shows that you're not worth anyone's time.
YES. LOVE THIS. Cinderella is a story about survival. About having hope that there'll be a light at the end of the tunnel. And I also think that a lot of people overlook how spunky/feisty Cinderella really was in the film. She gets annoyed and frustrated, and doesn't just completely accept the behavior of her stepmother and stepsisters. But ultimately she has to do her work and obey, because she's living under her stepmother's roof and has nowhere else to go. She's been raised by her stepmother since she was a child and it's all she really knows. She doesn't know what the outside world is like.
She didn't go to the ball for the prince...she went to the ball for a night off. The prince just happened to be a gateway out of her personal hell. People tend to judge by looking at the basis of the story, rather than what the actual film consists of and what the details provide.
Disney had planned on making a scene where she called out her stepfamily for all the hell they put her through but felt that it was out of character for her. Still it would have been an awesome scene for a victim of abuse finally telling their abusers exactly what they thought of them.
👏👏👏
This is why we have the trilogy
Tommy Ross
Personally I always thought snow white was more of the damsle but even she was able to run away, find a new place to live, and even take charge of her life.
CrystalOtaku93 That was because the huntsman helped her though
And so what if she DID ask for a man? Just like Amy said in Little Women, "For women, marriage is an economic proposition" it's easy to hold this movie to today's standards, but that's not fair.
Yes, this! In context, it was a damn pragmatic choice.
I agree, and besides there's nothing wrong with wanting companionship and a meaningful relationship with someone.
There's more to wanting a father for your children than an economic proposition, especially for those fortunate enough to be able to cover economic needs themselves.
Bruno the dog is the most underrated character in Cinderella. He is so precious.
That's the main thing I missed in the Disney live action remake: no Bruno!
Yeah, we don’t really talk about Bruno that much.
We don’t talk about Bruno, no, no, no okay I’ll stop.
I had never thought of Cinderella in this way, but y'all are absolutely right. She is full on proof that not all heroes wear capes. Thank you for this video
I love this video. People think you need to be a "rebel" or a "badass" to be strong, cool or interesting. I feel like kindness, or generally being the "good girl" if you will, is considered boring nowadays.
That and the fear that if you aré a good girl or "too feminine" people will not respect you or take you serioulsy (wich sadly happens very often). This makes so many young girls feel that they have to hate femeninity in order to be acepted.
It's like how some people immediately call any pretty (or just not noticeably ugly) female characters "vapid" or "just eye candy" but never say anything about stereotypically attractive male characters. I can't help but wonder if it comes from self-hatred and/or jealousy.
Or good boy
The reason she is being "the good girl" isn't only because she fears being otherwise or she isn't capable of being not good. If that was the case, she could've been cruel to the mouses and animals and it would still be justifiable. Being kind while not receiving kindness takes so much strength.
@@kiriki4558 I hate it whenever people don't take other female characters seriously just because they're a girly girl. Not every girl character can be "badass", be built like a man, or wield 2,000 guns with her in order to be considered a "great role model". Such a terrible message to send to young girls.
ironically, I think cinderella was a stronger character in the old cartoon than she was in the recent live action remake where she feels like a caricature of the idealistic disney heroine
I think it highlights some of the traits she exposed in the original, like the braveness and kindness as well as showing her fall to the point we see her in the original, but it does have some problems in not showing much of her life with the tremaines, I find it better than other remakes like Maleficent or Beauty and the beast
Except the movie basically took its premise from the book. At leastr5 some parts of it.
Yeah. I totally agree. In the remake she is what people say she is in the original. She is passive and a pushover, she never got upset until she broke down, so then it was all repressed anger with no build up. At keast she activelt got upset in private in the original. When she is locked in her room at the end the original pounds at the door, pylls it and asked her animal freinds for help. In the remake she just sings and is heard, gettinf out by accident. I don't kniw what others think of that, but to me that is certainly not strong.
@tecnoklaus the movie got popular because of the dress
Pop Culture Detective explains how masculinity doesn’t mean being muscular, a prick and non-emotional.
The Take explains how femininity doesn’t mean being weak, powerless and overly dramatic.
And I love it. This is the type of content that deserves all the attention.
I disagree your point
@@user-tk7hg7wi3p Valid. Wanna elaborate?
@@user-tk7hg7wi3p why?
which Pop Culture Detective video you refer to?
@@xereta1123 A whole lot of his videos talk about the subject but my current favorite is “The Fantastic Masculinity of Newt Scamander”
Cinderella never asked for a prince, she asked for a dress and a night off - Kiera Cass
Betty Behrens Such an amazing person and author she is
Betty Behrens Preach I love Kiera
Finally! It's about time some one did this. I've had many an arguement trying to defend Disney Princesses. I hate how being sincere, level headed, and peaceful are signs of weakness. Great video.
Weirdly, if it were a male character being depicted as sincere, level-headed, peaceful, kind, gentle, practical, and optimistic, almost nobody would have a problem with it... it's only when those qualities are applied to a female character that our society objects to it as "weakness".
@@pietrayday9915 so true! All the Tumblrinas would go "UwU what a soft Boi" or some shit but when it's a woman they'll call her a damsel in distress.
ѕнαмєlєѕѕ Cнιкα ugh ikrrrr
lmao, what are these people suppose to be? Jasper?
Me too! We need more female characters who are like that to show girls that it's ok. Growing up as a young girl I thought there was something wrong with me for being all of those things even though they are strengths.
Cinderella has a very realistic attitude when you look at it.
1k
Exactly. Running her mouth or escaping in this time would have either left her A dead or in a really bad position on the streets, or B lead to even harsher abuse. Honestly her two realistic best bets were A pray to God that her step mother died of old age soon and her step sisters were married off so maybe she could live in peace, or B get married and make a better life for herself, which she did. Can't blame her for getting out. She escaped, she just played it with wits rather then brute force.
You're right!
THANK. YOU. Someone said it. Maintaining your dignity and sense of self through years of abuse that started in childhood is one of the harder things any of the Disney princesses have done.
I was emotionally abused by my stepmother and always identified deeply with Cinderella. She was a role model and helped show me that I could endure while still not being hateful or being a bad person in return. I learned how to be a better person by rewatching Cinderella over and over. Thanks for speaking up for her!!
Same, I was abused by relatives for being adopted, not blood. I am a very sensitive person. And I persevered. Glad you did as well!
@@michellecnebrown6792 God bless you! I'm glad you persevered too.
I'm so glad!!
If you need to talk about the past to process it, there's this hotline I like to call. I was abused by my mother. The number is 1-541-754-0110. :) USA hotline. I love them soooo much. :)
@@michellecnebrown6792 If you need to talk about the past to process it, there's this hotline I like to call. I was abused by my mother. The number is 1-541-754-0110. :) USA hotline. I love them soooo much. :)
Calling Cinderella weak is the same as calling housewives weak. Traditional feminism is often considered weakness. That's not okay.
Lol you are aware that feminists are the ones you can thank for fighting for maternity leave, are you not? Feminists have slways included vast swathes of housewives. The media slandered and misrepresented them as a small group of angry, ugly man haters who are just pissed they cant get a date. Nothing farther from the truth. I wish history could not be so easily erased, forgotten, re-written.. 😔
Feminists dont consider femininity weak; its men who always have considered femininity "weak"
@@TheBeezusjones What you're saying is true but it isn't just what the media represents it as. The concept of feminism was supposed to be about gender equality but then came greedy women who just wanted to appeal to the female crowd. Some women spoke louder about asserting dominance over men, about how women are 'better' than men and saying things that are not true or just but just appeals to the crowd. They got selected as leaders and real feminism went to sh**.
Equality Oven exactly. Femininity is not weakness. And I am so sick of seeing people push the incredibly sexist view that femininity is weak, and masculine traits, mean strength. Then saying that they’re encouraging equality. No, they’re teaching our girls that in order to be considered “strong,” they must abandon their own gender.
Calla Lilly preaaaaaach sister...
I recently escaped from an abusive household and seeing this interpretation of Cinderella makes me cry a little 😭😢
I hope you find a happy beginning in your life
MagicalDreams I'm glad you're free.
MagicalDreams I'm very happy for you. I'm not sure how long you were in your situation, but speaking from experience, there is no shame in seeking help after abuse. I've been dealing with PTSD from mine for years. I thought I had it under control and then my Husband returned from a tour in Iraq. He isn't abusive, no worries there, but he does have PTSD now as well. I've been doing what I can to help him with what I know in between his psych sessions, but it's caused another surge in all my stuff. I will be returning to counseling to help get my mind straight. What I'm trying to say is, PTSD is a life long battle. It may not be combat PTSD, but it's just as bad. Do not ever be afraid of being seen as weak to seek help. I am happy you got out of your situation and I am very sorry you ever had to go through abuse.
awww
I had to drop out of high school and get married so that I could legally get out before something happened to me. I know the feel lol
I think it's interesting that people focus on Cinderella not being a strong, feminist icon; but there isn't much conversation about how Lady Tremaine and the other girls are toxic. Show your kids the movie and talk about how their behavior is inappropriate.
During my English class we discussed sexism and almost all the girls described "bad traits" such as being quiet, kind, and "staying in your place." They referred to this as "being ladylike" and there was a quote they used saying "In any fight, don't be ladylike." The word fight being used as a placeholdee word for any struggle such as starting a company or writing a book (idk). Being a teen girl who has these traits and hopes to create a movie or video game on the same scale as Disney or the Final Fantasy series, it hurt hearing from other girls that I'm essentially a bad influence for girls younger than me when in reality I think that the fact I don't feel the need to act masculine makes me stronger than they know. Like Cinderella, when someone is rude to me I kindly thank them for their opinion and move on with my day. No drama, no problems, and I didn't give that person the satisfaction of seeing my kind persona crack. Thank you for making this video. I felt guilty about being a kind person, or being naturally quiet. Lastly, to whoever read this, I hope you have a fantastic day 💜
EDIT: My quiet nature does not get in the way of me standing up for myself. If someone hits me i do not thank them and move on. I understand what these replies are saying, but this comment is NOT about physical confrontations but metaphorical fights. If you have a reply about physical confrontations, violence, assault, etc... I appreciate your input but that is not what my comment is about. Thank you 💜
Same. I am also the quiet one and tried to deal with haters with nonchalance and stoicism and sad to say, I am ostracised with it. People see me as weak and naive. I see myself as a very strong person tho. Just like Cinderella, I am hoping for a better future.
@@hannajmendoza8080 I personally don’t deal with it like that, and I think women who do crack should be given a lot of support and respect, but I also don’t think they should be disrespecting you either. The victims are never the issue
Me too, I got tired of trying to be this strong woman in a manly ways, it never worked out for me, I'm naturally not like that and I feel so much better by using my mental strength and intelligence rather than trying to be masculine. I'm stronger than my past abusers and happier than them, stronger than them. I feel more myself.
really, feminists don't bring other people down for being ladylike. you're a badass girl who prefers suits and black? go for it! you love pink and wear dresses? go for it! it's kindness and love that matters. :)
Being quiet and kind (feminine) is not valued in this world because power is important to humans- only way people think they can get that is being loud and aggressive (masculine). Makes sense animal wise- between the the person that fights and the person that chooses to stay back, it’s evident who will be getting the food + mate.
I love the fact that ScreenPrism sorta hinted that Cinderella often looks at the castle as she dreams, because the castle really symbolized her freedom which she longed for, not the people such as the royalties who lives inside it.
My favorite part is when ScreenPrism pointed out that when the prince saw Cinderella, she wasn't even seeing him. Savage X'D
yuzu +++
I know ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
That's why I loved Cinderella. I think I watched it 2 times a day as a child.
Also Cinderella clearly states her pain, anger and sadness when she’s alone. She’s also angry and not happy about being a victim of abusing. That scene she yelled Lucifer, or when clock started ringing, or that “What is it now” scene in the video. Cinderella was kind and optimistic, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have bad feelings about abusers and so many people also don’t understand that.
Also, she said the clock was “killjoy” because it was a symbol for ending of Cinderella’s dreaming time and facing with reality. That’s why when the clock hit 12, she transformed back, because it was time for turning to reality. That ball day was really a dream came true for her.
Wow thats great analysis many thanks for this realization! I really think these old princess movies should be seen with more detail because then people would see the intelligence of it and that these movies are indeed timeless classics cause their message still is important today
I always wondered why her Fairy Godmother had to give her the condition that the spell would break at midnight. I had assumed that the Fairy Godmother's magic stopped working at the time. Now I know that it's a metaphor for the clock signaling the end of the dream.
@@melissacooper4282 wow never really seen that way before. Good analysis!
I'm a feminist and it's true that strong female characters are usually portrayed as the outgoing tough girls, but I'm the opposite. This video made me realize I can show my strength just being me.
It takes a WHOLE lot inner strength to stay kind and optimistic in the face of abuse and mistreatment especially after losing both parents. Cinderella was always my favorite one; you dont have to take your trauma out on other people.
Karya irgil. The issue is that she's not necessarily in a position to really help herself. Many people in abusive situation find many different coping mechanisms to survive their circumstances. She did what she felt she had to do to get to the other side of her abuse. She ceased her control in the only ways she could, and decided to be positive in the face of extreme negativity. She's so happy at times that its almost passive aggressive. Its like refusing to feed into a bully. Her stepmother and sisters wanted to break her spirit. In many renditions it actually annoys her family. It is also what saves her in the end because the purity of her spirit (as well as physical beauty) that captivates the prince.
karya irgil think of her stepmother as a bully who is much stronger and much more experienced. Sure she could've fought back, but she may have merely ended up more broken in less time, as there would be no way for her to 'win'. She was a child with no friends aside from some animals and she didn't seem to have any neighbors and her only family treated her like dirt. Also If you're a scared little kid with no one to turn to you either become a vicious dog on a chain that snaps at anything that comes near or you find a way to cope harmlessly- until an opportunity arises.
@@karya7118 Even when she DIDN'T do anything, she still got punished by the family. Someone else mentioned it above, but there was that scene where Gus was in the teacup and the sisters freaked out and blamed Cinderella for it, and for it she had her workload tripled for the day.
They made it very clear that there's consequences for even the IDEA of her MAYBE disrespecting them, so what do you think would've happen if she would've more actively lashed out at them?
She had to pick her battles, and told Bruno the same thing, "yeah I know it sucks, but you gotta be smart and protect your own skin for now." She's well aware that she's stuck like chuck in a shitty situation, and even though it pisses her off, she's not going to allow it to make her bitter and resentful and just as hateful as them. "They can't stop me from dreaming", the one thing that despite everything, they can't take from her. And in fairytale fashion, they manifested into a reality where it paid off and she was able to get tf outta there when opportunity knocked. When she had the support system neccessary to get out of dodge safely.
I don't know what else you wanted her to do. Sorry she didn't kung-fu her way out Day One and just hoof it sight unseen.
I really loved this essay. The phrase "kindness is active, not passive" stuck with me
You do not need to be feisty, loud and argumentative to be a strong, independent woman.
Edit: Since this comment started a war, I'd like to clarify. I meant that being a feminist doesn't require you to be feisty, loud and argumentative. If you are that way, good for you. You probably have a great sense of self-worth and are able to stand your ground. If you aren't that way, you're fine as well. You don't have to force yourself to be like that. I personally think of Cinderella as a feminist for this reason. Thanks.
If anything those are signs of a weak woman nowadays.
DA MotoNeko why?
@@asmrmaddie9519 Because they are so weak they cant even take words being thrown at them. Much less fact.
Women like Cinderella are strong enough to listen and talk. Not hold their ears and scream over things.
I believe all traits can be included in someone who is strong and independent
DA MotoNeko you don't need to put people down for having different ways to deal with things... they are both strong in their own ways sure Cinderella can take the abuse and still be nice but people that can hold their ground and stand up for themselves it doesn't mean they just hold their ears over their head and scream..
"You can lock me in attics, you can take away my family, you can make me do every demeaning chore this house can offer and you can take anything that's mine but you will never stop me from being the most optimistic, imaginitive, pleasant and well-liked person in this house."
Staying a positive and happy in a horrible situation makes you a strong role-model. Cinderella was abused and manipulated by her step-mother yet still managed to keep her kindness.
Not only was she not bitter from all the emotional and physical abuse, she was not allowed to properly grieve and she WORKED HARD EVERYDAY. I barely feel like washing my dishes most days.
the dress ripping scene made me throw up as a child. Her horror her despair, how you could see it, it was like watching a beating
Susan Li it's framed so much like an assault, it's so harrowing! You just find yourself shouting 'stop!' at the stepsisters cause they are just so lacking in humanity. It's animalistic and violent, and it kind of reads almost like a rape coding in how it plays out and leaves Cinderella so bereft and traumatised afterwards. Obviously I don't mean to compare it to an actual assault, merely that the framing of it invokes the same sort of terrible helplessness. It's so upsetting and so effective in displaying the horror of it all.
' I don't mean to compare it to an actual assault, '
Ummm, someone ripping clothes off of you IS actual assault.
SerbAtheist okay, fair point, that would be a horrible assault, I just didn't want it to seem like I was minimising the horror of rape by comparing animated stepsisters ripping off clothing to actual sexual assault.
I literally cried as a child and got sick because it was her mother's old dress and that made it even worse
I don't want people to think I sound like I am encouraging Cinderella to have been abused because it actually has nothing to do with it despite also being Cinderella-related, but even with HOW her dress was torn down, she actually was attractive.
She wasn't expecting a fairy godmother to appear out of nowhere to solve her problems which is why she was planning to make her own dress. Because she didn't have time, her friends decided to repay her for her kindness.