Grace and I talk about how we navigate dealing with our past relationships while fostering our current relationship. How do y'all bring up your exes with your S.O.? Any constructive stories? Any what-not-to-do stories?
Ash Hardell I met this person a week ago and after we kissed today they got silent. I asked about their thoughts and they said that they wanted to talk. We laid on their bed and just talked about our past relationships and how we realisticly would want us to go about our relationship. They told me that they felt like they were more on the asexual side of the sexual-asexual spectrum and how it had affected their past relationships. So everything went fine and we got to talk about what's important to us as individuals in a relationship ❤️
Ash Hardell I live with my ex and their boyfriend. My partner has been super chill about that, because my ex is my closest friend. You really need to be with someone who'll take your life in stride, you know? It could have been a real problem with another, less trusting person, but I've been so blessed.
we are very casual about it, like were super open about it, maybe its because were both bi/pan neither of us feel threatened by itm its just a nonissue for my girlfreind and I
Ash Hardell my current partner and I were best friends before we got together so we know each other's exes so we have no issues discussing exes; except when to do so would hurt your partner. Definitely yes to what-not-to-do stories.
My ex boyfriend is super supportive of my relationship with my girlfriend. He's a great guy and he's still my best friend, it just wasn't working like it used to. I care for him a lot and still want him to be a part of my life, in whatever way he's comfortable.
I'm glad there is another person like this! My ex boyfriend is one of my best friends, and he supports my relationships with women, as I support his current relationship with a women. People have said to me they find it odd, but every relationship is different.
I have recently got back in touch with my ex boyfriend of 2 years, we have both romantically moved on and talk to eachother about our new partners(: its super nice feeling to be able to hold onto that friendship
I adore how you continue to break down certain things perceived as "taboo" subjects and also let us see what essentially are private conversations. My partner and I did this a while ago and it made our relationship even stronger!
I really appreciate this positive type of communication. Just watching this video made me feel good, nice vibes all around:) Also, side note, you 2 are so cute together!
I talk about my exes because they were major parts of my life. I like to tell stories. I can't tell my stories and *not* mention them, it'd be like trying to tell stories and not talk about my parents. I lived in Seattle for five years, because of my ex-husband. I visited Salt Lake City because of people I was dating. I have pictures of all my exes (save one) because I don't regret anything, and I think of them and that time in my life fondly. I respect if someone would get upset about talking about my exes too flippantly, but that'd probably mean we're not romantically compatible.
I talk about my ex too, we are still friends and have both romantically moved on. As he was such a big part of my life for such a long time I often find myself bringing him up. sometimes my friends just kinda say 'oh do you still miss him?' when i bring him up though which is irritating. Just because you break up with someone doesn't mean they cease from existence and the times you had together don't exist anymore lol
This is such a beautiful example of a healthy relationship! And the way you look at each other, I can actually feel the love and respect you have for one another. Your videos make me so happy :)
Love the openness the two of you have with each other. It's great to have these conversations, and helpful for this audience to be a fly on the wall to learn how to be more open and honest in our own relationships.
When grace says "especially when you're a married couple like us" I melted because now you are a married couple and I'm a puddle of an overload of cuteness
Such a cute people-pair... Did ash get a haircut or does her hair just look super good? probably both tbh...sort of jealous of both of your hair styles cause both of y'all look super dope
Just recently separated from my girlfriend and I haven't really been able to watch any relationship based videos but somehow you two manage to make me feel okay and hopeful. Thank you Ash and Grace. I hope to be 25% the amazing women you are in a relationship and in life. Love you guys❤️
I will probably get lost in the comments and this has nothing to do with the video, but you awesome sauce people for some reason motivated me to go and ask my crush out. Even though I'm an awkward potato she said yes. We have only been together for 6 months but I still want to say thank you. You guys and your positivity made me get up out of my seat and make the big decision of asking her...which lead me to coming out to my parents but that's for another comment... sooo yeah, thanks guys. You're awesome sauce.
Loved the honesty here and good advice. To be honest I do mute the into/outro because I find it a bit gimmicky but that's no biggie. Really enjoy your content & look forward to the next video!
It's being naive to think a pain from a past relationship can't impact a new one. If your partner is going through pain wouldn't you want to know why and possibly how to help? This is why you should discuss the past with your current so you know where you both where to get to best future for everyone. Love the openess you both have with each other. Thank you for sharing.
i dunno how to express how happy i am. thank you for sharing your relationship with us. we need more healthy queer relationships in the media!! i hope that someday ill have something like this
Changed my gender on Facebook yesterday because of Grace saying it in a collab video y'all did. I can't remember the exact video but Thank you Grace for introducing me to the term Graygender. That's exactly what I am. Just wish I could keep my facial hair from growing so darn fast.
I know, but it's from 20 years ago, and I've always loved that pic. But my facial hair really grows fast so I'm stuck with it. Even when I shave, I need to do it twice a day.
I’ve had three ex’s and I remember all my ex’s having fun moments with them but they all didn’t like me for who I was so here I am single but ! I’m still very happy having all my friends support and then telling me that I’ll find the right person when I’m older .
I dated a friend of mine for two and a half years and we're still friends. We helped each other learn a lot about ourselves and people in general. But the romantic/sexual portion of our relationship was no longer healthy so we stopped dating. I'm so thankful that I get to continue to be their friend bc we are both still growing and becoming better people. It feels so good to support them platonically and get the same thing back. It makes me so sad when people say they never want to talk to their exes again (unless they're hella toxic).
You two honestly have the best relationship ever. Like you’re so open and honest with each other and you’re so cute together and in love and just ugh. I wish I could be in a relationship like yours 💕
for me it's especially important to bring my ex boyfriend up in future relationships and I should probably have to do it early because my ex was very abusive and I came out of the relationship with a lot of triggers and new anxieties that I need to bring up to take care and protect myself. Though it could be a bit uncomfortable for my partner to be confronted with that pretty early, but it's absolutely necessary for me
It's so great to watch your videos, because I can clearly see you have a beautiful, healthy relationship. Not many people are able to talk about their exes so comfortably. Sooo I guess, congrats! :)
Could you do a video going into more detail about how you discuss and handle each other's discomfort? That sounds like a really valuable relationship technique.
I love all of your videos in their entirety but goodness me you are talented at the musicy beginnings. I normally replay them. I loooooved that one with the gay props and gay cat ('I accept you') but this was equally excellent in a different way. Well done you.
Hey lovely peoples! I just wanted to say that I saw a lot of advertisement for this video because I follow you both (or a page?) and I really loved this video. It helped me learn about myself and healthy ways of doing things. Your videos always provide this for me, however I became overwhelmed to finally reach out to you and tell you myself. You are wonderful people who are making a difference and I admire and respect you both. I genuinely appreciate your existances and the fact that you were brought together by the universe to make all that you do is possible. Thank you wonderful Hardell's. ~JoJo
Being as my only other major relationship other than the one I'm currently in resulted in my son, and the father and I are still quite close, feel very fondly for one another, are EXTREMELY committed to co-parenting with each other, consider each other family and do things together with out son talking about my ex is essential for me. In fact, before my current partner and I became "official" one of the conversations we had was about the fact that my ex was still a very big part of my life and that while I understand that sometimes that could be uncomfortable I could only be in a relationship with someone who was ok with this. As I am always parenting with this ex talking about him is always going to play some part in my life. That being said I do think there are times I maybe do it too much? It's a delicate balance (one that my current partner is SO FANTASTIC about btw)
Wow. Such a super important topic. Unfortunately, even brought up with the best Intentions, some people just Cannot deal. Which really sucks for me :( Anyhoo, love you guys!! 💮🌼💙
I love your relationship so much. ❤ you guys give the best advice and its actually very similar to the way my girlfriend and I approach things in our relationship. I would love to see more videos like this!
This is almost the same as my relationship story, my Girlfriend still talks and is good friends with her ex. Unfortunately, I must admit in the beginning of our relationship, I was a little jealous on their friendship and was afraid that they would fall in love again. It turned out that her ex is totally awesome, and last month my partner and I had a double date with the ex and her girlfriend.
Okies story time with Quelli~~ So when my girlfriend and I first started going out I was super jealous of her ex cause they were still really close (still are) and I had just got out of a really toxic relationship. So when I got the courage to talk to her about her ex and my feelings about them she said they’re best friends and if it helped me I could get to know them, soo cut to a few days later my girlfriends ex texted me and we chatted. My insecurities melted away and we became friends~~~
In my last relationship my now ex would constantly bring up her exs completely unnecessarily. I think we'd only been together about a month, we were on a date and she just spent a good half of the date just talking about stuff she'd done with her ex and how he surprised her with an amazing trip to Paris for her birthday a few years back. Needless to say moments like that just built up and made me feel incredibly uncomfortable and small (especially considering I was a university student and significantly younger than her so these kinds of things were impossible for me), but she would just dismiss how these things would make me feel and I suffer from quite bad anxiety as it is. I feel like it's one thing to bring up an ex when there's a constructive purpose to it, but when there isn't I think it can be quite detrimental that early in a relationship. To me things like this say "I would rather think about my past with someone else than be in this moment with you."
i think talking about exes in relationships is good bc it can show trust, but it also depends how MUCH your partner is talking about said ex. like when me and my girlfriend at the time started dating, she would talk about her ex-boyfriend which was fine with me bc he had been spreading rumors about her which left her really distressed. plus when she talked about their relationship it sounded kind of abusive. but the after a while i noticed that she would about him CONSTANTLY to the point where i started becoming uncomfortable. albeit it was always negative things, but it was too much (also i want to make it clear that i didn't/don't hate him). it got to the point where there was an outing with some friends that he and i were both invited to, that all those friends ditched and it ended up being just us three. i was like deadass on the other side of the room and even with my shitty ass eyesight i could see them flirting. she told me a couple hours later, when i had decided to just ditch them and go to my friends place that she still liked him and i was like, "yes?? no offense but it was obvious." anyway my dudes. red flags, i suppose.
I don't think it's healthy to stay friends w exes, only because it takes away from the meaning the relationship they had. there's a huge difference from dating and being friends and although you can go from being friends to being in a relationship going back just negates the importance of that transition. also, especially right after a breakup, it's important to give both parties time to learn to be alone again. it's not good to keep relying on an ex partner. breaking up means that we no longer feel that we have a future with that person, so I feel it's important to respect that. often, one person is still attached romantically and they will be given false hope of the relationship rekindling and the person who really is done with the relationship won't have to give up the person they left. breaking up is a commitment as much as a relationship is and I feel like people put down people who aren't on good standing with their exes. there's a difference between being on bad terms and just not being in each others lives anymore and I feel like a breakup means you're giving up on being in that person's life.
Loved meeting you guys at vidcon :) you were both so awesome and it's cool to watch you on the internet after having that little personal moment with you guys
I think i found that the most difficult experience with regards to exes are when one partner has an ex SO, but the other does not. It is also harder when one partner has a long-term relationship as background, and the other partner has never been in a relationship. In this sense, one partner has ways that they used to communicate with their ex, while the other one doesn't really know how to navigate a relationship at all.
The only time I talk abut my exes is when her and I are bringing up the past (because most of the time it will come up just because we want to know as much as we can about each other and make sure not to do things that could potentially upset one another). Out relationship is kinda different though because I've been with a few people and this is her first ever relationship so she does have questions about how things were and are almost comparing, but in a healthy way if that makes any sense? But we both are pretty comfy with the subject and yeah. This was a super cute video though! I loved it (:
Gees...I have not been on a date for 10 years 😣 Communication is the best key in it could be at any time if you want to talk about the past relationship so that way they can get a idea that they don't have to be jealous or have insecurities if they come across that persons or the person x .
When I went out for the first time with my girlfriend, I told about a guy who I went out with few weeks ago. I went out with him only two times but already in that time he turned into extremly possessive (guilt tripping me for not anwsering within an hour even though I was at work, etc.) and when I told him to leave me alone, he wasn't taking my word for it and send me lot of guilt tripping -messages, right after he had send ones begging me not to leave him (we saw each others twice, there was no relationship). So I was afraid that I was going to scare away this fantastic human being but I considered it to be more likely that not telling about that guy would mess up things than telling because I was still super jumpy and slightly scared because of him. Later she told me that she became little worried but she understood and let me decide when we talked in the beginning and also decide when to take next steps in our relationship.
Your relationship seems so healthy. I'll be honest, most of the things I've learned about healthy relationships and interactions I've learned from watching your channel. Things I thought were okay that weren't. Things I didn't know we're problems. Things I didn't know how to express. This is an amazing channel not just as an LGBT resource. Thank you.
I really like the heads up thing you guys do so you know whether the other person is comfortable. I feel like that's a good thing to do in diff situations so I'll put that to use! I feel like it's okay to bring up exes if you're not comparing people to each other and if it's in a more constructive manner or talking about experiences. I always used to be a person to bring up my ex to people just because it'd bother me and that got annoying after a while. Plus it never helped to just constantly talk about my ex either so I'd suggest not just going on about an ex to a partner unless it's agreed that you can have some complaining time haha
I try not to bring up my ex too much because I feel like it does make my boyfriend a bit uncomfortable. I do sometimes tell stories about her because I think they're funny or entertaining, but I usually avoid saying her name and opt out for "one time my friend did this" or "I had a friend who said this" and let the discussion be more about the event rather than the person.
I know my partners ex personally ( not a good relationship at times) and he knows my ex through passing, unavoidable when we were friends before dating. I kinda wish I didn't need to know his ex because she caused a lot of issues for me
13:42 when Grace goes in for a kiss, but Ash turns away at just the wrong moment. Story of my life. :'(
koutashinji awww no just spotted it 😂
This upset me so much but we all know Ash didn't mean any harm
"A marriage like we have.."
"Wait we are married?"
😂😂😂
I love you guys
timestamp?
Get someone who will look at you like Grace looks at Ash 💕
Arthur is the star of this channel lol
Phoebe Mortensen yep the true celebrity round here 😉
Arthur is so handsome and fluffy, I love him. This is a dumb/pointless reply. I just like my kitties a lot ^_^
Ash Hardell haha yes your kitties are the best
My cat is called arthur!!!!!!!
Arthur is the Ruler!!!
Grace and I talk about how we navigate dealing with our past relationships while fostering our current relationship.
How do y'all bring up your exes with your S.O.? Any constructive stories? Any what-not-to-do stories?
Ash Hardell I met this person a week ago and after we kissed today they got silent. I asked about their thoughts and they said that they wanted to talk. We laid on their bed and just talked about our past relationships and how we realisticly would want us to go about our relationship. They told me that they felt like they were more on the asexual side of the sexual-asexual spectrum and how it had affected their past relationships. So everything went fine and we got to talk about what's important to us as individuals in a relationship ❤️
Ash Hardell Mine became best friends. God help me, I now have to deal with 2 people if I ever rub either wrong.
Ash Hardell I live with my ex and their boyfriend. My partner has been super chill about that, because my ex is my closest friend. You really need to be with someone who'll take your life in stride, you know? It could have been a real problem with another, less trusting person, but I've been so blessed.
we are very casual about it, like were super open about it, maybe its because were both bi/pan neither of us feel threatened by itm its just a nonissue for my girlfreind and I
Ash Hardell my current partner and I were best friends before we got together so we know each other's exes so we have no issues discussing exes; except when to do so would hurt your partner. Definitely yes to what-not-to-do stories.
My ex boyfriend is super supportive of my relationship with my girlfriend. He's a great guy and he's still my best friend, it just wasn't working like it used to. I care for him a lot and still want him to be a part of my life, in whatever way he's comfortable.
I like this comment a lot :) Happy for you.
Ash Hardell wow thank you! I didn't expect to get a reply! Thank you so much for all the content you've put out, keep doing what you're doing! 💕
Auror Ajax Wilde he sounds really awesome! I hope you and your girlfriend are happy.
I'm glad there is another person like this! My ex boyfriend is one of my best friends, and he supports my relationships with women, as I support his current relationship with a women. People have said to me they find it odd, but every relationship is different.
I have recently got back in touch with my ex boyfriend of 2 years, we have both romantically moved on and talk to eachother about our new partners(: its super nice feeling to be able to hold onto that friendship
The way they look at each other.
I adore how you continue to break down certain things perceived as "taboo" subjects and also let us see what essentially are private conversations. My partner and I did this a while ago and it made our relationship even stronger!
"Woah a cat"
Watching this as my girlfriend and I of 3 years just broke up last night... The Feels😩😪
I feel like this was super adorable and intimate as a conversation and was superbly sweet! and deep. and a lot to think about! you guys are great!
You have so much visible chemistry, and your love for each other shines trough
❤️💛💚💙💜
I really appreciate this positive type of communication. Just watching this video made me feel good, nice vibes all around:) Also, side note, you 2 are so cute together!
Wow the communication between the two of you is amazing 💕 great teamwork and beautiful couple! ☺️
You looked at Grace's lips at least 10 times😂
Sofia Pagniez ....yea XP
I talk about my exes because they were major parts of my life. I like to tell stories. I can't tell my stories and *not* mention them, it'd be like trying to tell stories and not talk about my parents. I lived in Seattle for five years, because of my ex-husband. I visited Salt Lake City because of people I was dating.
I have pictures of all my exes (save one) because I don't regret anything, and I think of them and that time in my life fondly.
I respect if someone would get upset about talking about my exes too flippantly, but that'd probably mean we're not romantically compatible.
I talk about my ex too, we are still friends and have both romantically moved on. As he was such a big part of my life for such a long time I often find myself bringing him up. sometimes my friends just kinda say 'oh do you still miss him?' when i bring him up though which is irritating. Just because you break up with someone doesn't mean they cease from existence and the times you had together don't exist anymore lol
This is such a beautiful example of a healthy relationship! And the way you look at each other, I can actually feel the love and respect you have for one another. Your videos make me so happy :)
Ash is such a gorgeous human person. I love their face, hair, style, looks, EVERYTHING about them
talk about fighting when you're in a relationship or married
All these awesome queer artists singing at the beginning of your videos, you're going to make me go broke! I keep falling in love!
This honestly really reminds me of a podcast because it’s so chill
Love the openness the two of you have with each other. It's great to have these conversations, and helpful for this audience to be a fly on the wall to learn how to be more open and honest in our own relationships.
This sounds like a podcast, and I am so in love with this concept! I would love to see and listen to more of those quiet moments 😌
The "raw unscripted" homey videos are my faves! ✨
When grace says "especially when you're a married couple like us" I melted because now you are a married couple and I'm a puddle of an overload of cuteness
Such a cute people-pair...
Did ash get a haircut or does her hair just look super good? probably both tbh...sort of jealous of both of your hair styles cause both of y'all look super dope
Their*
Just recently separated from my girlfriend and I haven't really been able to watch any relationship based videos but somehow you two manage to make me feel okay and hopeful. Thank you Ash and Grace. I hope to be 25% the amazing women you are in a relationship and in life. Love you guys❤️
I will probably get lost in the comments and this has nothing to do with the video, but you awesome sauce people for some reason motivated me to go and ask my crush out. Even though I'm an awkward potato she said yes. We have only been together for 6 months but I still want to say thank you. You guys and your positivity made me get up out of my seat and make the big decision of asking her...which lead me to coming out to my parents but that's for another comment... sooo yeah, thanks guys. You're awesome sauce.
Whitney Lee great story
ameliorated Ha...thanks.😅
Whitney Lee yessssssss congrats friend
ChromeEdition Thanks friend, I hope that you have an awesome sauce day. 😺
I love how they look at each other when they talk. They're truly listening to each other. It's awesome to watch
Loved the honesty here and good advice. To be honest I do mute the into/outro because I find it a bit gimmicky but that's no biggie. Really enjoy your content & look forward to the next video!
the intro is so freaking cute oml you guys give me so much hope and all the good feelz~ about this world.
You guys are just too cute. I can't take this. It's like cuteness overload and then a cat walks by.
i would love love love it if you two had a podcast like this
i love so much how you two address each other - the consideration and attention y'all give each other is so beautiful 😍
It's being naive to think a pain from a past relationship can't impact a new one. If your partner is going through pain wouldn't you want to know why and possibly how to help? This is why you should discuss the past with your current so you know where you both where to get to best future for everyone.
Love the openess you both have with each other. Thank you for sharing.
i dunno how to express how happy i am. thank you for sharing your relationship with us. we need more healthy queer relationships in the media!! i hope that someday ill have something like this
Changed my gender on Facebook yesterday because of Grace saying it in a collab video y'all did. I can't remember the exact video but Thank you Grace for introducing me to the term Graygender. That's exactly what I am. Just wish I could keep my facial hair from growing so darn fast.
Bryan Lee Williams but your display pics got facial hair
I know, but it's from 20 years ago, and I've always loved that pic. But my facial hair really grows fast so I'm stuck with it. Even when I shave, I need to do it twice a day.
Bryan Lee Williams
I know this is random, but nice hat! Go Cubs!
Thanks!
i want someone to look at me the way grace looks at ash
same
I’ve had three ex’s and I remember all my ex’s having fun moments with them but they all didn’t like me for who I was so here I am single but ! I’m still very happy having all my friends support and then telling me that I’ll find the right person when I’m older .
I dated a friend of mine for two and a half years and we're still friends. We helped each other learn a lot about ourselves and people in general. But the romantic/sexual portion of our relationship was no longer healthy so we stopped dating. I'm so thankful that I get to continue to be their friend bc we are both still growing and becoming better people. It feels so good to support them platonically and get the same thing back. It makes me so sad when people say they never want to talk to their exes again (unless they're hella toxic).
I really love how you share vulnerable parts of your marriage/relationship in general. Really cool ❤️
you took the time to mention all your patrons damn you're such a caring person! Sending you much love ❤
You two honestly have the best relationship ever. Like you’re so open and honest with each other and you’re so cute together and in love and just ugh. I wish I could be in a relationship like yours 💕
for me it's especially important to bring my ex boyfriend up in future relationships and I should probably have to do it early because my ex was very abusive and I came out of the relationship with a lot of triggers and new anxieties that I need to bring up to take care and protect myself. Though it could be a bit uncomfortable for my partner to be confronted with that pretty early, but it's absolutely necessary for me
Grace and Ash are so amazing. I really look up to them as people and as a couple. What a great video, they spread so much love and joy. 💜
Grace is so well spoken. I love when you both do videos together ❤️👭❤️
i swear your communication skills are on point. good for you!
Hey Ash, you left Grace hanging at 13:45 hahaha poor thing!
It's so great to watch your videos, because I can clearly see you have a beautiful, healthy relationship. Not many people are able to talk about their exes so comfortably. Sooo I guess, congrats! :)
You're both so open with us and each other about everything and I love it
If I had a dollar every time Arthur came up to the camera I wouldn't be rich
Could you do a video going into more detail about how you discuss and handle each other's discomfort? That sounds like a really valuable relationship technique.
Even when it's one take, your editing is fantastic.
this video was so important, thank you both.
I love all of your videos in their entirety but goodness me you are talented at the musicy beginnings. I normally replay them. I loooooved that one with the gay props and gay cat ('I accept you') but this was equally excellent in a different way. Well done you.
You have such a beautiful relationship. Makes me feel all warm & fuzzy on the inside! 💜
Hey lovely peoples! I just wanted to say that I saw a lot of advertisement for this video because I follow you both (or a page?) and I really loved this video. It helped me learn about myself and healthy ways of doing things. Your videos always provide this for me, however I became overwhelmed to finally reach out to you and tell you myself. You are wonderful people who are making a difference and I admire and respect you both. I genuinely appreciate your existances and the fact that you were brought together by the universe to make all that you do is possible. Thank you wonderful Hardell's.
~JoJo
Being as my only other major relationship other than the one I'm currently in resulted in my son, and the father and I are still quite close, feel very fondly for one another, are EXTREMELY committed to co-parenting with each other, consider each other family and do things together with out son talking about my ex is essential for me. In fact, before my current partner and I became "official" one of the conversations we had was about the fact that my ex was still a very big part of my life and that while I understand that sometimes that could be uncomfortable I could only be in a relationship with someone who was ok with this. As I am always parenting with this ex talking about him is always going to play some part in my life. That being said I do think there are times I maybe do it too much? It's a delicate balance (one that my current partner is SO FANTASTIC about btw)
Thank you for showing what a healthy relationship looks like❤️
You guys are so emotionally mature and healthy. Keep up the great content
I love how ash said "I've never really seen, oo a cat" 😂
Why are you the best couple ever?!?!?
Wow. Such a super important topic. Unfortunately, even brought up with the best Intentions, some people just Cannot deal. Which really sucks for me :(
Anyhoo, love you guys!! 💮🌼💙
I love your relationship so much. ❤ you guys give the best advice and its actually very similar to the way my girlfriend and I approach things in our relationship. I would love to see more videos like this!
This is almost the same as my relationship story, my Girlfriend still talks and is good friends with her ex. Unfortunately, I must admit in the beginning of our relationship, I was a little jealous on their friendship and was afraid that they would fall in love again.
It turned out that her ex is totally awesome, and last month my partner and I had a double date with the ex and her girlfriend.
Also, I have a love for your relationship/marriage. You guys are so perfect for each other!
You two are absolute goals
The intro was SO CUTE
always intelligent talks between Ash and Grace, I enjoy your points of view
Okies story time with Quelli~~
So when my girlfriend and I first started going out I was super jealous of her ex cause they were still really close (still are) and I had just got out of a really toxic relationship. So when I got the courage to talk to her about her ex and my feelings about them she said they’re best friends and if it helped me I could get to know them, soo cut to a few days later my girlfriends ex texted me and we chatted. My insecurities melted away and we became friends~~~
That's a very nice story 😺
You two are so cute! I'm so happy to see this 🥰
Thank you so much for this video. I really needed this in my life.
In my last relationship my now ex would constantly bring up her exs completely unnecessarily. I think we'd only been together about a month, we were on a date and she just spent a good half of the date just talking about stuff she'd done with her ex and how he surprised her with an amazing trip to Paris for her birthday a few years back. Needless to say moments like that just built up and made me feel incredibly uncomfortable and small (especially considering I was a university student and significantly younger than her so these kinds of things were impossible for me), but she would just dismiss how these things would make me feel and I suffer from quite bad anxiety as it is.
I feel like it's one thing to bring up an ex when there's a constructive purpose to it, but when there isn't I think it can be quite detrimental that early in a relationship. To me things like this say "I would rather think about my past with someone else than be in this moment with you."
i think talking about exes in relationships is good bc it can show trust, but it also depends how MUCH your partner is talking about said ex.
like when me and my girlfriend at the time started dating, she would talk about her ex-boyfriend which was fine with me bc he had been spreading rumors about her which left her really distressed. plus when she talked about their relationship it sounded kind of abusive.
but the after a while i noticed that she would about him CONSTANTLY to the point where i started becoming uncomfortable. albeit it was always negative things, but it was too much (also i want to make it clear that i didn't/don't hate him). it got to the point where there was an outing with some friends that he and i were both invited to, that all those friends ditched and it ended up being just us three. i was like deadass on the other side of the room and even with my shitty ass eyesight i could see them flirting. she told me a couple hours later, when i had decided to just ditch them and go to my friends place that she still liked him and i was like, "yes?? no offense but it was obvious."
anyway my dudes. red flags, i suppose.
you guys need a podcast
I don't think it's healthy to stay friends w exes, only because it takes away from the meaning the relationship they had. there's a huge difference from dating and being friends and although you can go from being friends to being in a relationship going back just negates the importance of that transition. also, especially right after a breakup, it's important to give both parties time to learn to be alone again. it's not good to keep relying on an ex partner. breaking up means that we no longer feel that we have a future with that person, so I feel it's important to respect that. often, one person is still attached romantically and they will be given false hope of the relationship rekindling and the person who really is done with the relationship won't have to give up the person they left. breaking up is a commitment as much as a relationship is and I feel like people put down people who aren't on good standing with their exes. there's a difference between being on bad terms and just not being in each others lives anymore and I feel like a breakup means you're giving up on being in that person's life.
Loved meeting you guys at vidcon :) you were both so awesome and it's cool to watch you on the internet after having that little personal moment with you guys
Nice icon ;D
Panna Julia thanks haha my dad asked me recently why I had a weird cult symbol as my profile and I had to explain 😂
It's not just a cult, it's a legit religion 😂
I think i found that the most difficult experience with regards to exes are when one partner has an ex SO, but the other does not. It is also harder when one partner has a long-term relationship as background, and the other partner has never been in a relationship. In this sense, one partner has ways that they used to communicate with their ex, while the other one doesn't really know how to navigate a relationship at all.
The only time I talk abut my exes is when her and I are bringing up the past (because most of the time it will come up just because we want to know as much as we can about each other and make sure not to do things that could potentially upset one another). Out relationship is kinda different though because I've been with a few people and this is her first ever relationship so she does have questions about how things were and are almost comparing, but in a healthy way if that makes any sense? But we both are pretty comfy with the subject and yeah. This was a super cute video though! I loved it (:
I looooooved the song at the beginning and the intro and how it all fit together. Loved it.
The video was good too.
haha
0:10 the shuffling of the sheets matches the music
you two are just so cute together :) thanks for sharing your stories!!
Not only is this really interesting you two are absolutely adorable✨
Gees...I have not been on a date for 10 years 😣 Communication is the best key in it could be at any time if you want to talk about the past relationship so that way they can get a idea that they don't have to be jealous or have insecurities if they come across that persons or the person x .
I have a cat too and she gets involved with everything!! Also I really like that you’re honest about your relationship! 🏳️🌈
Great video and Steph's music is so cool! Thanks for introducing me to them!
Good, healthy relationship advice. Thanks, guys!
When I went out for the first time with my girlfriend, I told about a guy who I went out with few weeks ago. I went out with him only two times but already in that time he turned into extremly possessive (guilt tripping me for not anwsering within an hour even though I was at work, etc.) and when I told him to leave me alone, he wasn't taking my word for it and send me lot of guilt tripping -messages, right after he had send ones begging me not to leave him (we saw each others twice, there was no relationship). So I was afraid that I was going to scare away this fantastic human being but I considered it to be more likely that not telling about that guy would mess up things than telling because I was still super jumpy and slightly scared because of him. Later she told me that she became little worried but she understood and let me decide when we talked in the beginning and also decide when to take next steps in our relationship.
Legit conversations like this is relationship goals for me
Ugh you guys are such goals
they're finishing each other's sentences. it's adorable.
Your relationship seems so healthy. I'll be honest, most of the things I've learned about healthy relationships and interactions I've learned from watching your channel. Things I thought were okay that weren't. Things I didn't know we're problems. Things I didn't know how to express. This is an amazing channel not just as an LGBT resource. Thank you.
You two seem to have such a great healthy relationship, love to see it.
Awwww your relationship is so cute and healthy, and it gives me hope and smiles! :)
Why are you guys so, CUTE!
I really like the heads up thing you guys do so you know whether the other person is comfortable. I feel like that's a good thing to do in diff situations so I'll put that to use! I feel like it's okay to bring up exes if you're not comparing people to each other and if it's in a more constructive manner or talking about experiences.
I always used to be a person to bring up my ex to people just because it'd bother me and that got annoying after a while. Plus it never helped to just constantly talk about my ex either so I'd suggest not just going on about an ex to a partner unless it's agreed that you can have some complaining time haha
I am overwhelmed with the cuteness.😄
I try not to bring up my ex too much because I feel like it does make my boyfriend a bit uncomfortable. I do sometimes tell stories about her because I think they're funny or entertaining, but I usually avoid saying her name and opt out for "one time my friend did this" or "I had a friend who said this" and let the discussion be more about the event rather than the person.
I know my partners ex personally ( not a good relationship at times) and he knows my ex through passing, unavoidable when we were friends before dating. I kinda wish I didn't need to know his ex because she caused a lot of issues for me
Everyone wants to have and Arthur channel. FINNLEY IS SO CUTE TOO! WE NEED AN ASH AND GRACE'S PETS CHANNEL.