@@failedatmakingasandwich423 , And WHY is it always youngins like yourself that come and try to poke holes in my comments? So weird how so many disrespectful kids are out there acting like they know about things they don't. Go play your games and watch anime.
@@failedatmakingasandwich423 , No. The majority of women do have the same situation. To be clear. My point isn't invalid because you don't believe in it. Lol
Thank you, for counteracting hate scrolling. A lot of people just don’t check if something is true/logical or not because they become consumed by hate and misinformation.
“Can men and women be friends” YES. Omg, it’s not hard. If men are physically incapable of being friends with women they don’t find attractive, how are they able to care about their daughters/sisters/mothers? We are human, and most men do WANT TO SEE US as human. The reason so many don’t is because of society, and the way they’re taught to objectify women.
From my experience a large problem is when a boy is taught that women are romantic interests for men, even by almost all media. Yeah, dating is cool, but god I am so mad that even now I still get self concious when talking to female friends because "what if i like them? what if they like me? am i being too friendly? will my friend who is also her boyfriend think I'm being too friendly? will my girlfriend think I'm being too friendly?" I am so mad that the people who should've taught me how to make friends instead taught me to see friendship with girls as the first step towards dating, eliminating 50% of the friendships I could've had
Friendship towards girl is indeed te first step towards dating. You'd never know what happens in the future, it's a slow process, your inner questions and thoughts are valid. Whether they end up liking you or you end up liking them, you can't control either. @@Velzizar
@Velzizar to add to your experience, I've always found the portrayal of women as some trophy in media also destroys growing men's understanding of identity. We're encouraged to believe that, based on these stories and social conditioning- our value is tied purely to whether or not we can "get the girl". You know who doesn't achieve that in media? The loser, the villain, the unworthy. Colour me shocked that men grow to become dangerously influenced by whether or not a woman approves of his advances, resorting to him becoming aggressive to her or others in retaliation for this fear he is the "unworthy" one in all these movies and gossip throughout their community. Seriously, find me a show or movie centered around a man, and I guarantee his drive is STRONGLY motivated by achieving things that water down to "so (woman character) finds me desirable". We need more male-centric media about men being fulfilled and happy regardless of a love interest. Show men a way of living that a crush/woman's attention is as detrimental to their existence as getting the highest K/D in a match.
@@JayMick the shows I grew up with had good main characters who weren't chasing after the girl, like Dragon ball, Beyblade, Batman trilogy, Iron man Spiderman, Death Note, Hunter × Hunter, etc.
My favourite fact about brain activity studies is that an MRI study has shown that dead salmon experience emotions! So we have two options: either every single brain activity study has a chance to be very wrong or dead salmon are magic. Also on the note of a gendered brain I often hear that the average male and average female brain are more similar to each other than if you picked two random people from the same gender and compared their brains. All in all neuroscience is kinda sketchy and while it can definitely show some trends in very large sample sizes (like how there do seem to be minor intrinsic differences correlating to gender identity) you can't really draw any conclusions about a singular person from their brain scans (except for like tumors or smth)
The whole "intrinsic gendered brain" myth-past suggestion was later disproven, even a Trans man himself, a popular pro-trans youtuber Alexander Avila said this is inaccurate. Not all ppl are born with gender identity and these identities eventually develop and sometimes they change,sometimes they stay, same for sexuality, it's fluid sometimes in some individuals. We don't exactly know which causes trans or cis or sexuality , we know of some guesses and some mix ups but these causes and mix ups aren't always the same in all ppl of a gender or sexuality. I'm not denying minor innate differences existing between sexes or genders, I'm just saying that there's no truly *overall* male or female brain or cis or trans brain( as of currently). This doesn't mean we shouldn't support trans ppl right to exist at all, but pretending that the same science oppressing trans ppl is going to liberate them is too hopeful and lost thinking, it's still kinda pathologizing trans ppl in a medical context, ppl shouldn'tneed a reason to being themselves, or at least such reasonbe themselves not of others and especially not of an academic area heavily subjected to biases, queer ppl have beendoing this for centuries if not millenia. And even then this minor differences which number of differences, which especific ones and how much they differ are varying from person to person, there's almost always exceptions. A lot of ppl in this society sadly link masculinity or femeninity with a certain sexuality, gender and sex and it isn't always the case for any or none of those groups...
@@lmcb8447 I mean I literally said that you can't derive anything from a single person's brain scan. You're taking me entirely out of context and putting words in my mouth and I'm not even gonna try engaging with someone incapable of basic reading comprehension.
To add on, there's nothing wrong with being attracted to someone. Needing your partner to never be attracted to another human but yourself is extremely narcissistic.
Yes and no. Principally, yes, it is narcissistic to want eyes on you and only you. There will always be others we find attractive for a variety of reasons. That's just how most peopl are. Still it's natural and absolutely human to take some level of offense to that. Humans are competitive creatures, especially in terms of relationships. Learning your partner is attracted to someone can reasonably ignite that sense of competition. This also shouldn't be held against anyone.
@@ultilinium8 there is a difference between "I have competition" and "how dare you even glance in the direction of a member of the opposite sex" though, the comment you replied to clearly implied the latter
Also "attracted" is a fairly vague term. I'm sure the woman in the video was referring to sexual attraction, but the supposed study could have clearly defined it as any type of attraction and that would be an easy thing to miss if it wasn't included in the study abstract. If I'm talking to someone that I actually do not find attractive in any way (eg. intellectually, platonically) then yeah, I probably would get annoyed quicker. I say that as an ace woman. All that says about my friends is that they're people I like.
I've heard that me having a lot of women friends is a huge red flag... and then I realized the context for many male-female friendships don't reflect my reality. I didn't realize that a lot of guys just keep girls around as back-up plans and when this is the case, they're not really his friends. In my opinion, if a guy doesn't respect women enough to pursue meaningful, aromantic, asexual relationships with them, then he isn't someone you want to date anyways.
One thing we learned about MRI's is that our brains are personalized. Just like some bodies have vaginas and some have dicks, some sternums are a bit higher, lower, or not there at all. brains develop differently. So when you say an area ''lights up'', a neuroscientist is more interested in the behaviour that is being displayed in relation to it rather than what is normally associated with it. To think the other way around is what the expression ''placing the cart in front of the horse'' was made for rather than in response to.
Current popular strains of feminism that fail to deal with gender bioessentialism as the root problem end up just going right back to sexist beliefs about both men and women. There are strains of feminism that do tackle the issue, mainly by examining trans people's position and what their existence and oppression imply about how gender is enforced on everyone, to everyone's detriment. It's just that those strains are more niche, because rejecting trans people is currently a pretty popular political stance among those in power.
I think personally it is not only possible but essential for trans gender theory to address bio essentialism. Trans men in particular tend to violate the assumption that gender is essential from birth because many trans men see masculinity as a new feminist territory to explore in their own bodies rather than being "born this way" - a relationship that likely has to do with how masculinity shapes a trans person's upbringing. The real motivation for treating gender as essential is largely diagnostic. Trans people have always been harassed by psychiatry and the "right" way to be, so establishing alienation from psychiatry was essential. However personally I think psychiatry itself needs to be re-evaluated in this respect, because not only is the threat of being medicalized loom constantly but quite frankly psychiatric patients need libération from it's oppressive appparatuses too. Source: I'm a trans man with many transman friends + severe mental health advocate
@@PunishedFelixI mean, gender seems to be essential; the problem is that we’ve stapled a bunch of made up roles to it and it’s really hard to get past all the gender role stuff and know what gender really means beyond people having a general sense of sameness with each other.
To say that enforcing gender on everyone is a detriment is a pretty bold claim. I think gender roles in say, ancient Rome, were terrible. But we have a lot more issues with mental illness and generally less happy people despite a far higher standard of living. If your claim was correct, then our society wouldn't have started collapsing the moment we stopped enforcing gender.
I'm so uncomfortable and very distracted watching others cutting something pointing the blade directly at their hands like that 😬 (...even though I do stupid things like that myself sometimes; at least I don't do it while also being preoccupied talking to a camera)
Imagine having no healthy relationships with the opposite sex. Woman really has never met a functioning man (unless she did and immediately drove him away with her aggressive insecurities)
People that make their insecurities other people's problems are usually lonely. Probably part of why she's ranting into a camera speaking to people that can't respond.
Had a guyfriend once had a creepy girl towards him in a similar situation like the girl in the vid got a creep guy, so while not excusing sexism as a coping mechanism I get why she's taking refuge in that so she has ""proof"" backing her personal bad expirience and feelings associated with it. Only most of those who had an actual entirely platonic friendship between a man and a woman do understand and know that its possible ,despite if what they were taught and if they did let go of personal amd universal selfish confirmation bias and generalizations, regardless of how different or not(ppl in a group are different and in between groups there's similarities)gender, sexuality and wether they're masc or fem. Not all ppl are straight and not only male-female friendships are the ones who sometimes eventually develop feelings wether mutual or not. Even exes can sometimes go to go being friends only platonical mutually. You can even like and/or be attracted to someone and see yourself together better as friends if you are respectful, you can even become a couple and after go back to being friends wholly platonically. Tired of this segregation and essentialism... By far most of the male and female(Im bi) friends I've never felt anything explicit or romantic towards them and neither had most of them towards me, same for most of my male friends with most of their female friends and most of my female friends with most of their male friends. I had a few instances of both types feelings separately amd mixed developing from me and from them but they went eventually away too and we still remain wholly great friends mutually .
I think it's impossible. Have had many male friends over the years and they ALL caught feelings. Even some of the women! Thankfully, unlike my husband, I am REALLY loyal and only have eyes for him. Lol
@@CS_Star-w4i No offense, but your own personal experience doesn’t get to be the authority moreso than anyone else’s. Although, arguably, bi people are the ones to defer to on this. Because they’re attracted to both/any genders, so if it was truly “impossible” then they’d… literally struggle to have any friendships *ever* Because either they’d end up attracted to all of them or all their friends would be attracted to them (since bi people tend to befriend other LGBTQ people, too). Like I’m bi, and I have lots of friends of all genders and sexualities, and many of them are very attractive to me (like legit my exact type). But I have never had any issues “flipping a switch” in my head if they’re in a relationship or if they give signs of not being interested back. Afterwards it’s just like appreciating their beauty aesthetically, like a sunset I guess (lol), rather than there being a romantic/sexual aspect. And this isn’t that uncommon even for hetero people-in my experience-who do have attractive “cross-gender” friends who they acknowledge they find attractive. It’s just flexible vs inflexible thinking-which is literally a recognized cognitive skill in psychology. So it sounds like your friends just didn’t have this skill well developed or at all (no shade here, that’s still pretty common which is why this myth persists…it’s just a matter of practice in how many friendships like that you develop + keep).
@@badkafka908 No offense, but I'm not the only woman saying this. Most women are, in fact. I stopped reading at "Like I'm bi". You're not educated in this particular subject in the way I am. Thank you. Bye bye.
I think she can imagine what it’s like because she is once of those people that experienced it themselves. She finds unattractive people annoying without reason
@@donttalktomeplzimsad I personally don't know any. So for me it's like a weird untrue sexist statement, I'm sure you get that. I think it's a cultural thing, I don't think it's biological. I respect people for their personality, not their sexual attractiveness.
@@wintutorials2282 I mean I've personally seen people like that but I agree with you with it being mostly cultural rather than anything. (biology plays a role in my opinion but society has a way greater impact.)
can't really see of any possible biological explanation of why men and women couldn't be friends...especially when there's differences in a group amd similarities between groups, and even then there's exceptions so it wouldn't still be 100% impossible for 100% of ppl...
Can't really see any biological explanation of how men and women couldn't be friends, especially if there's no attraction involved mutual or not,especially if mutual non-attraction,even then there's exceptions and it wouldn't mean that it's 100% impossible for all 100% of ppl to have an entirely mutual platonic male and female friendship. Feelings sometimes develop between same sex ones , same for opposite sex ones thus sometimes not eventually developing explicit/rom feelings...
Thank you for making this video. I've had to jump off of social medial because of the kind of sexist content that would appear on my feeds. It feels like a senseless and unfactual attack on the opposite gender. Now, usually this is from young people who are still forming their ideas about the world, but they are harmful to the self esteem of men, none the less. ❤
this reminds me of an Interpersonal Communications class I was in where most of my class unironically believed that guys and girls can’t be friends apart from me and this one other mixed race sporty girl who raised their hand
How old were the participants? It seems to me that the more experience people have in life the more they are aware that there is generally a level of truth to stereotypes, because that is how they become stereotypes. Of course it isn't all simply black or white. More of a "would if I could" situation.
I'm curious to find out how being outside the gender binary and not being heterosexual play into this; gay men get along with women all the time in my experience
I found that men are not "annoyed" around unnatractive women, but quite the opposite, mainly, you can see that men tends to be a lot more respectful with "unatractive women", specially if they pass the 25 years, they will treat you as "mistress" and not "girl"
So it sounds like she is saying men only get annoyed with women they r not attracted too 🤨 so they r annoyed with pretty much every women that sounds pretty stupid
Agreed, if someone acts a certain way it's almost certainly because they were taught or they have adapted to do so, and it's sad that so often people don't think about the fact that experiences are the primary things that shape us, thus gender shapes us perhaps only through the experiences it leads us to. Although i do have a worry. If we assume that male and female brains are completely identical, do we not risk missing some of the nuance that comes with the gender? In the same way we have missed differences in the action of medicines and the symptoms of diseases and disorders over the history?
It might be interesting to make that assumption, at least that brains are pretty much the same until hormones affect them for certain situations or circumstances. So far the assumption has been that men's brains and women's brains are so radically different that w0Men caN't D0 m@Th or understand men and they're all hypochondriacs who overreact to pain, and I'm tired of that assumption. Let's try something different.
There was a study on infant primates to see if they had a gender preference in toys. The study found that males did not. But the females had a large preference to dolls over trucks. They are infants and no human, so I think this suggests that there is something innate to gender that can't be explained by culture. So I disagree with how you attribute so much to what people are taught. Also to your point at the end. Many types of therapy were developed on female patents. I have heard a few psychologists point how therapy is often far less effective at helping men then women. So I think people denying gender differences is definitely leading to harm in the medical fields. I imagine assume a difference that doesn't exist and denying a difference that does exist are about as harmful. But our current culture has a clear bias in one direction here.
The most convincing argument for "women can't be friends with men" has always to me been that of safety. It is so common for male friends to stay friends until they think they have a chance or they catch feelings. Most women ive met, have a story like this. Where men will bide their time in the friendzone and then swoop in. Which can be especially scary, as rejecting some men can become very dangerous very quickly. And you never know who will react that way from a quick glance, or if their intentions have always been to bed you. To only be a "conquest" That my two cents anyway. But pseudo science shouldn't be used to control your partner, you cant control your partners thoughts, its what they do in response to those thoughts that matters. And if your man objectifies women and has a "wandering eye" girl just leave, he can have em. No need to waste the mental energy getting stressed about it. 😂 Either hes not secure in your relationship or youre not secure in yourself, a relationship cannot be built on an insecure foundation.
Yep. This is why as a woman i DO NOT have other male friends than my husband. Every single time they catch feeling and it's not good. In the reverse, my hubby was caught using prone which has KILLED me. Mentally, physically, I don't really want to date or have sex again really. He has killed my want for romance, love and attention. If the man I want to give me the attention, gives it to someone else, then what? What's the point in relationships then?
Attraction is not limited to sexual attraction. Colloquially, we use the term to specify sexual attraction, but when used in the concept of things our brain likes, it's much broader. Generally speaking, I would imagine that most people's brains experience "attraction" when engaging with those they call friends, regardless of anyone's gender or sex. It is literally just about what intrigues your brain. If we didn’t find them to be attractive to us in some manner, they wouldn't actually be your friend since you wouldn't want to engage with them.
2:20 archeologists are just over exaggerating when describing bones I guess Edit: this comment doesn’t invalidate your identity or disagree with every other part of this video.
Archaeologists continously talk about how they fail to sex bone structures - especially when we get to more complicated creatures and use varyingly narrow descriptors for sex (disallowing third sex options, ignoring internal organ placements, and structural makeup). Humans are one such creature, in which we have multiple varying cultural and biological markers that develop in utero and outside. But hey, keep pretending gender isn't a social structure, surely it must be a brain thing, couldn't be a complex societal imagination meant to undermine people and support additional structures that build off of it.
@@yokothespacewhale You mean one of the 4 main types of pelvis, right? Cause let me tell you... there's a reason it's called *main* and not *DEFINITIVE* But hey, that's just nuance in reality, I mean, why not let a simple google search define your worldview with no additional intrigue! I'm sure this is a fully good faith reason.
the word "femininity" or "masculinity" in this term doesn't mean who it's coming from, it means who it's directed at. roughly put, toxic masculinity is a harmful mindset about what a man is or should be, what is manly, for example, "men shouldn't cry or they're weak". both men and women can say this but it's still about masculinity. i didn't really understand why he mentioned toxic masculinity here, because the girl doesn't tell what a man should be, but i guess you can see the statement "men are only nice with women they're attracted to, and get annoyed when talking to women they're not attracted to" as a harmful image of men, therefore the term is applicable
@@СэрМелифаро-т1т It must be noted that "toxic masculinity" is a political slogan meant to push curtain ideas about what men should be over others. I would ask what evidence you have that something like male stoicism is harmful since that was your example? I will point out that many types of therapy that have generally been accepted as effective for women are ineffective on men. Many times we look at how we personally would feel or be effected and project it onto others. Based on what I have heard from several psychologists about gender differences in therapy techniques, that projection doesn't work to understand the other gender. The criticism of male stoicism often comes from this same projection, since the stoicism in women is generally unhealthy it is assumed to be bad in men too.
This is what we in the humanities would call “science fiction” but for social media medium. Imagine reading, like, “A Princess of Mars” in 1912 and because it’s presented as a first person narration travelogue believing there are people living on Mars. In 1912.
I genuinely forget that gender stereotypes and 'differences' between men and women exist sometimes, that's how little sense they make to me. Also if I was annoyed or irritated by someone I was interacting with, why would I be speaking to them in the first place?
As a woman who loves my husband my eyes ARE only on him and I have NO PROBLEM doing so. You men are NOT RIGHT> Something is seriously wrong with your brains. If you think you love someone, you will NOT BE attracted to other women. Women don't lust for other men, and men should not lust for other women. Matthew 5 : 28: "But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Do not come disagreeing with me. This is the Biblical law on marriage. I didn't write it. Question why you're so unhappy guys,
@@CS_Star-w4i Good thing your beliefs influence my relationships as little as your silly book does. Stop commenting this delusional proselytizing nonsense if you don't want comment responses.
In MRI studies you can actually tell the difference between male and female brains around 95% of the time. That's just MRI which does not show smaller structures or function. Dealing with sexist attitudes is one thing, but this feels more like science denial. People's rights should not be based on science they should be based on morality.
This is a really balanced take. My only question would be, do you think those brain differences are natural or do you think that growing up with male/female socialization changes parts of the brain through nurture?
Erudite, balanced, analytical, commendable vid. Science is indeed about drawing conclusions from the data and is evidence- based. Whereas rumour, certain types of delusion and some dogma seems to start with the conclusion and cherry-picks only evidence that agrees. Maybe I'm a little "ministry of stating the obvious", but I'm a simple mind.
Calling masculinity toxic only pushes men further right and into the arms of people like Tate. Well done for helping to bring about a new wave of misogyny.
As much as we like to pretend we are different species, Women are from Mars, Men are from Venus type of mentality, the differences are not genetic, but social and biological in that we are radically different in physical strength (this does matter in our perceptions and security in the world). We over generalize social cues and under percieve words, language and tone of voice to convey intention, which is why we rarely get along between the sexes as far as perception of the world (we are the subject, so we see ourselves through the eyes of other people, and this feels like a harsh reality sometimes), but I think at least we do agree that our feelings are valid (we know what they are) and our bodies are free from oppression or suppression (we have the freedom to choose our mate). We want the same thing biologically (connection), but we rarely want the same thing cognitively (protection). If we are lonely in our mind, we cannot attach biologically, so we pull people in to be lonely with us instead of coming up to connect at a basic level of human need (physical touch). Men view their world from the outside in, and women view their world from the inside out.
All good until you start about toxic feminity wich exists and as a hypersensetive man i´am not only able to explain it to men and women but also find it in every days life and interactions. BOTH Sexes have their problems in interactig with each other, something i thought we would have figured out since we know the others sex for thousands of years? It´s not that simple. But when you over anylize and therefore over complicate things.... no wonder people don´t know what to do anymore. I have been called toxic for not agreeing with someone and then i was blamed cuz white and male, and we all know that kind of person right? RIGHT? No, you don´t. If you feel the need to speak about toxic masculinity we also have to speak about toxic femininity or just don´t even bother.
I wish you'd let her speak for herself instead of constantly interrupting. Nonetheless it's incredibly disheartening to see women perpetuating the narrative of the patriarchy, that women are threats to intimacy.
What? I'm not quite sure what your point is supposed to be, if you're suggesting those two are related then that's a logical fallacy. Not to mention the fact that toxic masculinity definitely is a real, proven thing, it's just that (especially nowadays) it's overused improperly.
@@mitchratka3661because if one gender is toxically expressed, there must be something different about the brains of the genders. Otherwise, we have a new problem where the same structure, functioning the same way, is producing a different result. As it stands, the truth is *we don’t know*. We don’t understand the physical means behind thought, how could we begin to accurately describe differences or similarities in things we do not understand? Neuroscience is underdeveloped and mystic.
@@sladepullman-stewart9162 ok I might just be tired, but honestly I don't understand most of that. As for why the brain would be operating differently based on the sexes, or genders it doesn't matter, that could literally just be due to us considering ourselves one or the other; I mean seriously we can have major physical impacts on our own brain due to THINKING we took medicine, that's what a placebo is, so the fact that gender/sex is one of the MOST influenced aspects in terms of how we think/express ourselves means it's very likely it has nothing to do with being born either gender/sex and everything to do with environment. Probably not 100-0, but I think it's overwhelming a majority that it's basically negligible, so with rounding maybe 100-0 lol
I'm pretty sure toxic masculinity is meant we're raised by the society thinking that's what masculinity is. Kind of how we think about other gendered brain. So i don't see how his 2 statements contradict one another.
No fundamental NEUROLOGICAL differences between men and women. Obviously, since humans are a sexually dimorphic species, men and women are different, but there are very few neurological differences between men and women. Heck, even the basic idea of women leaning more emotional and men leaning more logical has exceptions. My own mother is a logical thinker, so I know at least one exception.
@@ArrogantWriter oh I agree with that -it makes sense neurologically. I suppose we have just been so inundated with ridiculous information that there are no differences between the sexes that I’m ready to throw in the towel on society. Heh
He is one of those guys that if anyone has a comment that says other then him in the video, he will remove it. He removed all my previous comment's before. They don't want to hear the truth on the subject.
@@CS_Star-w4i You know, if he is removing comments, it's probably to counteract uneducated drivel and its misleading effects on vulnerable people scrolling through the comment section. Freedom of speech doesn't mean that every idea is equally worth considering, you know. It just means that you're not going to be thrown in jail for stating your beliefs.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it something like the male brain has 10 times as much gray matter as a female brain and the female brain has 6.5 times as much white matter as the male brain, The female brain is 10% smaller in total volume, but has 20% more connective tissue between the left and the right hemisphere. On top of all this, the male brain is vertically wired with more dominance to the left hemisphere where the female brain is horizontally wired because of the connective tissue between the left and right hemisphere. And male Brains use more occipital Activity and have more frontal lobe access. It seems to me that You and your community Of Gender neutralists Are making up this bullshit that there is no difference between the mail and the female brain. When there is Huge significant differences.
Why do you think the "gender neutralist" crowd, as you call us, is also pro-trans? We're not saying this stuff is meaningless, we're saying it's far too complex and varied in individuals to set up a binary norm based on averages.
Got to wonder about the possible relationship this gray matter thing and how the reduction in gray matter during pregnancy and recently after birth works. Gross oversimplification: pregnant people (who tend to be women) see a temporary reduction in gray matter through neural pruning. This doesn’t mean they get less intelligent, it means that their thoughts are faster and more efficient, which might be important in taking care of a small and fragile human being that needs things all the time. Also, how do trans and intersex folks factor into this? What do their brains look like?
I'm no expert but my understanding is that some dimorphic differences are common but nothing is universal, and also that different morphology doesn't necessarily mean any particular difference in intelligence or personality.
You don't understand what toxic masculinity is, and likely have some preconceived notion of it you were fed by antifeminists. It's very common. If you actually spent any time looking at scholarly sources discussing toxic masculinity, you'd realize that: 1. It's not some anti-man hate-all-men philosophy. And toxic masculinity does not mean "masculinity is toxic" 2. You'd realize examples of toxic masculinity and its enforcement are obvious and highly normalized in society. It's not something you can argue doesn't exist because it's super obvious to see every day. Ever see people get super upset and very performative about what they would do to pedophiles? Ever see people argue that women shouldn't have the right to vote? The fact that 1 in 3 women are a victim of sexual assault or rape kinda proves that toxic masculinity exists. Now: since we know it exists, we can work to address it. But the fact that the moment you see "toxic masculinity" and decide there's no credibility. That means you are refusing to accept real problems in the world exist and are unwilling to engage in good faith. Toxic masculinity exists but you use the phrase as a thought terminating cliché. You shouldn't use thought terminating clichés. It's bad to prevent yourself from thinking.
What about toxic femininity? I mean the women who baby talks their men and treats them like kids. Get's with multiple men to be "like the boys". Cheats like men, goes to bars and genuinely acts like because she is a woman she can do what she wants... is that okay?> Generally toxic masculinity, are men who hurts others mentally and physically. Most of these kind of men wont let people have emotions. If you're a man, you just ost your mom, and the toxic masculine man will say something like "Suck it up you girl... rub some dirt in it.... Men don't cry" or something like that. Kinda how you said "e term toxic masculinity their credibility goes straight to the trash." That is toxic as you are ignoring someone's emotions on the subject. Toxic masculinity often glorifies aggression or violence as a way to solve problems or assert power. There’s pressure to always be in control and to dominate others, especially in relationships, which can lead to toxic or abusive dynamics.. for example, not letting her leave is a big one. This is why there are soo many programs out there to help "free" women in that situation. There’s often disdain for anything perceived as feminine, including the devaluation of women and the rejection of men who don’t conform to traditional masculine roles, often manifesting in sexist or homophobic behavior. It may also involve the belief that men should be sexually aggressive or that they are entitled to sex, which can foster unhealthy attitudes toward consent and relationships.
Oh, I suppose you think you can mansplain neuroscience because you have a PhD? That somehow makes you better than some rando on tiktok cutting a mango while rambling on about her unbiased scientific education that justifies how men (and probably women) find her annoying? Who's side am I on? I can't even tell anymore.
it sounds like you are trying to take the opposite extreme stance here and say there are no differences between genders i hope thats not the case as anyone can see the behavioral differences clear as day and we all know that behavior is predominately determined by the brain So yes massive differences but obviously not the ones shes alluding to.
I can say with a 95% confidence interval that men only have friendships with the opposite sex if it is a romantic or physical interest. Otherwise, he is just a colleague. Make no mistakes ladies, that sweet and stingless bee is actually just hiding the fact that he would sting you if you let him
Buddy, the only person you can talk about with 95% accuracy is yourself. This isn't a "man" problem, it's a misogynist problem. Sex isn't "stinging" someone. If you characterize it as inherently predatory like that, it says a lot about how you view women and WHY you can't genuinely be friends with any of them.
@@laurelgardner F me. Bees are a predator species now, LOL. Above all else is the bumblebee, the top of the food chain. Beware of the bee, it might make you cease to be.
That was a clear and concise rebuttal to social media copy pasta slop. Thanks for clearing that up so completely. Truthfully, I only wanted to comment how you choice of glasses emphasizes how your nose and facial hair look like a 🥸 disguise.
It is also entirely possible to find someone physically attractive, and NOT act on it.
If he's incapable of just being friends with women, you don't want to be dating him in the first place.
Don't be fooled Katie.....NO men can be around the opposite sex.
@@CS_Star-w4iyou're living in an echo chamber. Men are just as different from each other as women are different from each other.
@@failedatmakingasandwich423 , And WHY is it always youngins like yourself that come and try to poke holes in my comments? So weird how so many disrespectful kids are out there acting like they know about things they don't. Go play your games and watch anime.
@@CS_Star-w4i lol
Your experiences don't change the fact that other people have different situations. It's misandry to say all men are the same.
@@failedatmakingasandwich423 , No. The majority of women do have the same situation. To be clear. My point isn't invalid because you don't believe in it. Lol
Thank you, for counteracting hate scrolling. A lot of people just don’t check if something is true/logical or not because they become consumed by hate and misinformation.
You mean, removing anyone who agrees with her? Of course a man wont agree with getting called out.
@@CS_Star-w4idon’t you have self loathing to get to?
@@ambitiousmuslimrecordings3451 , Na, I am a pretty happy person. Sorry if that's how you live your life.
“Can men and women be friends”
YES. Omg, it’s not hard. If men are physically incapable of being friends with women they don’t find attractive, how are they able to care about their daughters/sisters/mothers? We are human, and most men do WANT TO SEE US as human. The reason so many don’t is because of society, and the way they’re taught to objectify women.
"Can men and women really be friends?"
Yes, 100%. But I cannot be friends with people who take that question seriously, lol.
From my experience a large problem is when a boy is taught that women are romantic interests for men, even by almost all media. Yeah, dating is cool, but god I am so mad that even now I still get self concious when talking to female friends because "what if i like them? what if they like me? am i being too friendly? will my friend who is also her boyfriend think I'm being too friendly? will my girlfriend think I'm being too friendly?" I am so mad that the people who should've taught me how to make friends instead taught me to see friendship with girls as the first step towards dating, eliminating 50% of the friendships I could've had
Friendship towards girl is indeed te first step towards dating. You'd never know what happens in the future, it's a slow process, your inner questions and thoughts are valid. Whether they end up liking you or you end up liking them, you can't control either. @@Velzizar
@Velzizar to add to your experience, I've always found the portrayal of women as some trophy in media also destroys growing men's understanding of identity.
We're encouraged to believe that, based on these stories and social conditioning- our value is tied purely to whether or not we can "get the girl". You know who doesn't achieve that in media? The loser, the villain, the unworthy. Colour me shocked that men grow to become dangerously influenced by whether or not a woman approves of his advances, resorting to him becoming aggressive to her or others in retaliation for this fear he is the "unworthy" one in all these movies and gossip throughout their community.
Seriously, find me a show or movie centered around a man, and I guarantee his drive is STRONGLY motivated by achieving things that water down to "so (woman character) finds me desirable".
We need more male-centric media about men being fulfilled and happy regardless of a love interest. Show men a way of living that a crush/woman's attention is as detrimental to their existence as getting the highest K/D in a match.
@@JayMick the shows I grew up with had good main characters who weren't chasing after the girl, like Dragon ball, Beyblade, Batman trilogy, Iron man Spiderman, Death Note, Hunter × Hunter, etc.
My favourite fact about brain activity studies is that an MRI study has shown that dead salmon experience emotions!
So we have two options: either every single brain activity study has a chance to be very wrong or dead salmon are magic.
Also on the note of a gendered brain I often hear that the average male and average female brain are more similar to each other than if you picked two random people from the same gender and compared their brains.
All in all neuroscience is kinda sketchy and while it can definitely show some trends in very large sample sizes (like how there do seem to be minor intrinsic differences correlating to gender identity) you can't really draw any conclusions about a singular person from their brain scans (except for like tumors or smth)
I wouldn't say neuroscience as a whole is sketchy. It's just still very young, brains are complicated, and scientists are biased.
There's plenty of solid stuff in neuroscience that has large bodies of verifiable evidence behind it. You just don't find it on dumb tiktoks
The whole "intrinsic gendered brain" myth-past suggestion was later disproven, even a Trans man himself, a popular pro-trans youtuber Alexander Avila said this is inaccurate. Not all ppl are born with gender identity and these identities eventually develop and sometimes they change,sometimes they stay, same for sexuality, it's fluid sometimes in some individuals.
We don't exactly know which causes trans or cis or sexuality , we know of some guesses and some mix ups but these causes and mix ups aren't always the same in all ppl of a gender or sexuality.
I'm not denying minor innate differences existing between sexes or genders, I'm just saying that there's no truly *overall* male or female brain or cis or trans brain( as of currently). This doesn't mean we shouldn't support trans ppl right to exist at all, but pretending that the same science oppressing trans ppl is going to liberate them is too hopeful and lost thinking, it's still kinda pathologizing trans ppl in a medical context, ppl shouldn'tneed a reason to being themselves, or at least such reasonbe themselves not of others and especially not of an academic area heavily subjected to biases, queer ppl have beendoing this for centuries if not millenia. And even then this minor differences which number of differences, which especific ones and how much they differ are varying from person to person, there's almost always exceptions.
A lot of ppl in this society sadly link masculinity or femeninity with a certain sexuality, gender and sex and it isn't always the case for any or none of those groups...
@@lmcb8447 I mean I literally said that you can't derive anything from a single person's brain scan. You're taking me entirely out of context and putting words in my mouth and I'm not even gonna try engaging with someone incapable of basic reading comprehension.
I see your point, but a part of me just read your comment and went “hmmm magic salmon, i want that, can we have that?"
To add on, there's nothing wrong with being attracted to someone. Needing your partner to never be attracted to another human but yourself is extremely narcissistic.
Yes and no. Principally, yes, it is narcissistic to want eyes on you and only you. There will always be others we find attractive for a variety of reasons. That's just how most peopl are. Still it's natural and absolutely human to take some level of offense to that. Humans are competitive creatures, especially in terms of relationships. Learning your partner is attracted to someone can reasonably ignite that sense of competition. This also shouldn't be held against anyone.
@@ultilinium8 there is a difference between "I have competition" and "how dare you even glance in the direction of a member of the opposite sex" though, the comment you replied to clearly implied the latter
@@ValdrVideo can we stop using “narcissistic” as a synonym for “unreasonable and/or abusive”
@@esobelisk3110 correct, they aren't interchangeable. I was using it to mean "narcissistic."
Also "attracted" is a fairly vague term. I'm sure the woman in the video was referring to sexual attraction, but the supposed study could have clearly defined it as any type of attraction and that would be an easy thing to miss if it wasn't included in the study abstract. If I'm talking to someone that I actually do not find attractive in any way (eg. intellectually, platonically) then yeah, I probably would get annoyed quicker. I say that as an ace woman. All that says about my friends is that they're people I like.
I've heard that me having a lot of women friends is a huge red flag... and then I realized the context for many male-female friendships don't reflect my reality. I didn't realize that a lot of guys just keep girls around as back-up plans and when this is the case, they're not really his friends. In my opinion, if a guy doesn't respect women enough to pursue meaningful, aromantic, asexual relationships with them, then he isn't someone you want to date anyways.
One thing we learned about MRI's is that our brains are personalized. Just like some bodies have vaginas and some have dicks, some sternums are a bit higher, lower, or not there at all. brains develop differently. So when you say an area ''lights up'', a neuroscientist is more interested in the behaviour that is being displayed in relation to it rather than what is normally associated with it. To think the other way around is what the expression ''placing the cart in front of the horse'' was made for rather than in response to.
Current popular strains of feminism that fail to deal with gender bioessentialism as the root problem end up just going right back to sexist beliefs about both men and women.
There are strains of feminism that do tackle the issue, mainly by examining trans people's position and what their existence and oppression imply about how gender is enforced on everyone, to everyone's detriment. It's just that those strains are more niche, because rejecting trans people is currently a pretty popular political stance among those in power.
You're a real one, pal 💪 I agree with you
I think personally it is not only possible but essential for trans gender theory to address bio essentialism. Trans men in particular tend to violate the assumption that gender is essential from birth because many trans men see masculinity as a new feminist territory to explore in their own bodies rather than being "born this way" - a relationship that likely has to do with how masculinity shapes a trans person's upbringing.
The real motivation for treating gender as essential is largely diagnostic. Trans people have always been harassed by psychiatry and the "right" way to be, so establishing alienation from psychiatry was essential. However personally I think psychiatry itself needs to be re-evaluated in this respect, because not only is the threat of being medicalized loom constantly but quite frankly psychiatric patients need libération from it's oppressive appparatuses too.
Source: I'm a trans man with many transman friends + severe mental health advocate
@@PunishedFelixI mean, gender seems to be essential; the problem is that we’ve stapled a bunch of made up roles to it and it’s really hard to get past all the gender role stuff and know what gender really means beyond people having a general sense of sameness with each other.
Nothing to add but I am enjoying the discussion
To say that enforcing gender on everyone is a detriment is a pretty bold claim. I think gender roles in say, ancient Rome, were terrible. But we have a lot more issues with mental illness and generally less happy people despite a far higher standard of living. If your claim was correct, then our society wouldn't have started collapsing the moment we stopped enforcing gender.
I'm so uncomfortable and very distracted watching others cutting something pointing the blade directly at their hands like that 😬
(...even though I do stupid things like that myself sometimes; at least I don't do it while also being preoccupied talking to a camera)
she's attractive and I'm still* annoyed and irritated
Because you don't want to agree with her.
Being so confidently incorrect is a pretty ugly look, and that level of ignorance looks good on no one.
@@chey7691 BTW, the study calls it the "mans rat brains." Lol.
Relatable. However, they won't last long tho. Let time do its thing. Just enjoy your life. If that means a single life, so be it
"You only like her because she's nice and pretty!"
That's a low bar and you still couldn't meet it. How hard is it to be nice?
Imagine having no healthy relationships with the opposite sex. Woman really has never met a functioning man (unless she did and immediately drove him away with her aggressive insecurities)
People that make their insecurities other people's problems are usually lonely. Probably part of why she's ranting into a camera speaking to people that can't respond.
Sexist pop psychology is the worst. My coworkers are infected. I had to explain to them who Steven pinker was 🤮
Had a guyfriend once had a creepy girl towards him in a similar situation like the girl in the vid got a creep guy, so while not excusing sexism as a coping mechanism I get why she's taking refuge in that so she has ""proof"" backing her personal bad expirience and feelings associated with it.
Only most of those who had an actual entirely platonic friendship between a man and a woman do understand and know that its possible ,despite if what they were taught and if they did let go of personal amd universal selfish confirmation bias and generalizations, regardless of how different or not(ppl in a group are different and in between groups there's similarities)gender, sexuality and wether they're masc or fem.
Not all ppl are straight and not only male-female friendships are the ones who sometimes eventually develop feelings wether mutual or not.
Even exes can sometimes go to go being friends only platonical mutually.
You can even like and/or be attracted to someone and see yourself together better as friends if you are respectful, you can even become a couple and after go back to being friends wholly platonically.
Tired of this segregation and essentialism...
By far most of the male and female(Im bi) friends I've never felt anything explicit or romantic towards them and neither had most of them towards me, same for most of my male friends with most of their female friends and most of my female friends with most of their male friends.
I had a few instances of both types feelings separately amd mixed developing from me and from them but they went eventually away too and we still remain wholly great friends mutually .
I think it's impossible. Have had many male friends over the years and they ALL caught feelings. Even some of the women! Thankfully, unlike my husband, I am REALLY loyal and only have eyes for him. Lol
@@CS_Star-w4i No offense, but your own personal experience doesn’t get to be the authority moreso than anyone else’s.
Although, arguably, bi people are the ones to defer to on this. Because they’re attracted to both/any genders, so if it was truly “impossible” then they’d… literally struggle to have any friendships *ever*
Because either they’d end up attracted to all of them or all their friends would be attracted to them (since bi people tend to befriend other LGBTQ people, too).
Like I’m bi, and I have lots of friends of all genders and sexualities, and many of them are very attractive to me (like legit my exact type).
But I have never had any issues “flipping a switch” in my head if they’re in a relationship or if they give signs of not being interested back.
Afterwards it’s just like appreciating their beauty aesthetically, like a sunset I guess (lol), rather than there being a romantic/sexual aspect.
And this isn’t that uncommon even for hetero people-in my experience-who do have attractive “cross-gender” friends who they acknowledge they find attractive.
It’s just flexible vs inflexible thinking-which is literally a recognized cognitive skill in psychology.
So it sounds like your friends just didn’t have this skill well developed or at all (no shade here, that’s still pretty common which is why this myth persists…it’s just a matter of practice in how many friendships like that you develop + keep).
@@badkafka908 No offense, but I'm not the only woman saying this. Most women are, in fact. I stopped reading at "Like I'm bi". You're not educated in this particular subject in the way I am. Thank you. Bye bye.
Good job dismantling this TikTok.
I love seeing men engage with feminist ideas and how they apply to men as well, thank you for adding to the conversation
I think she can imagine what it’s like because she is once of those people that experienced it themselves. She finds unattractive people annoying without reason
I wouldn't say that. she probably encountered many men who do this. unfortunately there are a lot of them.
@@donttalktomeplzimsad I personally don't know any. So for me it's like a weird untrue sexist statement, I'm sure you get that.
I think it's a cultural thing, I don't think it's biological. I respect people for their personality, not their sexual attractiveness.
@@wintutorials2282 I mean I've personally seen people like that but I agree with you with it being mostly cultural rather than anything. (biology plays a role in my opinion but society has a way greater impact.)
can't really see of any possible biological explanation of why men and women couldn't be friends...especially when there's differences in a group amd similarities between groups, and even then there's exceptions so it wouldn't still be 100% impossible for 100% of ppl...
Can't really see any biological explanation of how men and women couldn't be friends, especially if there's no attraction involved mutual or not,especially if mutual non-attraction,even then there's exceptions and it wouldn't mean that it's 100% impossible for all 100% of ppl to have an entirely mutual platonic male and female friendship. Feelings sometimes develop between same sex ones , same for opposite sex ones thus sometimes not eventually developing explicit/rom feelings...
Please make more!! This is such a great topic to discuss and input factual data and studies…
Thank you for making this video. I've had to jump off of social medial because of the kind of sexist content that would appear on my feeds. It feels like a senseless and unfactual attack on the opposite gender. Now, usually this is from young people who are still forming their ideas about the world, but they are harmful to the self esteem of men, none the less. ❤
this reminds me of an Interpersonal Communications class I was in where most of my class unironically believed that guys and girls can’t be friends apart from me and this one other mixed race sporty girl who raised their hand
How old were the participants? It seems to me that the more experience people have in life the more they are aware that there is generally a level of truth to stereotypes, because that is how they become stereotypes. Of course it isn't all simply black or white. More of a "would if I could" situation.
But.... I regularly get annoyed by women I'm ATTRACTED TO.
I'm curious to find out how being outside the gender binary and not being heterosexual play into this; gay men get along with women all the time in my experience
I always wonder the same, but unfortunately this kind of bs is usually said by straight people who forget other genders and sexualities exist 😔
as soon as someone doesn’t cite their source and/or has no clue how to qualify read or understand actual research, I roll my eyes, and move on.
It's easy to find, just google, "rat brain study."
I found that men are not "annoyed" around unnatractive women, but quite the opposite, mainly, you can see that men tends to be a lot more respectful with "unatractive women", specially if they pass the 25 years, they will treat you as "mistress" and not "girl"
Wait until this woman finds out queer people exist
Lol, what guarantee do you have about the existence of that
I was so afraid that she was going to cut herself accidentaly
Great video, very concise 👍
THANK YOU. I've been saying the brain/sexes thing for years but no one believes me!
So it sounds like she is saying men only get annoyed with women they r not attracted too 🤨 so they r annoyed with pretty much every women that sounds pretty stupid
But they are. Look at the comments here since you commented. Most men are annoyed by real women, because they can just go use corn.
Agreed, if someone acts a certain way it's almost certainly because they were taught or they have adapted to do so, and it's sad that so often people don't think about the fact that experiences are the primary things that shape us, thus gender shapes us perhaps only through the experiences it leads us to. Although i do have a worry. If we assume that male and female brains are completely identical, do we not risk missing some of the nuance that comes with the gender? In the same way we have missed differences in the action of medicines and the symptoms of diseases and disorders over the history?
It might be interesting to make that assumption, at least that brains are pretty much the same until hormones affect them for certain situations or circumstances.
So far the assumption has been that men's brains and women's brains are so radically different that w0Men caN't D0 m@Th or understand men and they're all hypochondriacs who overreact to pain, and I'm tired of that assumption. Let's try something different.
There was a study on infant primates to see if they had a gender preference in toys. The study found that males did not. But the females had a large preference to dolls over trucks. They are infants and no human, so I think this suggests that there is something innate to gender that can't be explained by culture.
So I disagree with how you attribute so much to what people are taught.
Also to your point at the end. Many types of therapy were developed on female patents. I have heard a few psychologists point how therapy is often far less effective at helping men then women. So I think people denying gender differences is definitely leading to harm in the medical fields. I imagine assume a difference that doesn't exist and denying a difference that does exist are about as harmful. But our current culture has a clear bias in one direction here.
The most convincing argument for "women can't be friends with men" has always to me been that of safety. It is so common for male friends to stay friends until they think they have a chance or they catch feelings. Most women ive met, have a story like this. Where men will bide their time in the friendzone and then swoop in.
Which can be especially scary, as rejecting some men can become very dangerous very quickly. And you never know who will react that way from a quick glance, or if their intentions have always been to bed you. To only be a "conquest"
That my two cents anyway. But pseudo science shouldn't be used to control your partner, you cant control your partners thoughts, its what they do in response to those thoughts that matters. And if your man objectifies women and has a "wandering eye" girl just leave, he can have em. No need to waste the mental energy getting stressed about it. 😂 Either hes not secure in your relationship or youre not secure in yourself, a relationship cannot be built on an insecure foundation.
Yep. This is why as a woman i DO NOT have other male friends than my husband. Every single time they catch feeling and it's not good. In the reverse, my hubby was caught using prone which has KILLED me. Mentally, physically, I don't really want to date or have sex again really. He has killed my want for romance, love and attention. If the man I want to give me the attention, gives it to someone else, then what? What's the point in relationships then?
Attraction is not limited to sexual attraction. Colloquially, we use the term to specify sexual attraction, but when used in the concept of things our brain likes, it's much broader. Generally speaking, I would imagine that most people's brains experience "attraction" when engaging with those they call friends, regardless of anyone's gender or sex. It is literally just about what intrigues your brain. If we didn’t find them to be attractive to us in some manner, they wouldn't actually be your friend since you wouldn't want to engage with them.
Well, she annoyed me so it must be true.
2:20 archeologists are just over exaggerating when describing bones I guess
Edit: this comment doesn’t invalidate your identity or disagree with every other part of this video.
Archaeologists continously talk about how they fail to sex bone structures - especially when we get to more complicated creatures and use varyingly narrow descriptors for sex (disallowing third sex options, ignoring internal organ placements, and structural makeup). Humans are one such creature, in which we have multiple varying cultural and biological markers that develop in utero and outside. But hey, keep pretending gender isn't a social structure, surely it must be a brain thing, couldn't be a complex societal imagination meant to undermine people and support additional structures that build off of it.
@@mixstardust429I just googled male vs female pelvis and discarded your opinion
@@mixstardust429I just googled the difference between the male vs female pelvis. I’m not pretending anything.
@@yokothespacewhale You mean one of the 4 main types of pelvis, right? Cause let me tell you... there's a reason it's called *main* and not *DEFINITIVE*
But hey, that's just nuance in reality, I mean, why not let a simple google search define your worldview with no additional intrigue! I'm sure this is a fully good faith reason.
@@mixstardust429my valid and well supported opinion about the pelvis and how it relates to gender could hardly be described as my worldview.
Thanks for pointing how she is mangling that mango. Honestly, it was distracting me from the mangled misogyny she was repeating.
How does this relate to toxic masculinity? Isn't the girl in the video being sexist towards men? Wouldn't that be toxic femininity?
the word "femininity" or "masculinity" in this term doesn't mean who it's coming from, it means who it's directed at. roughly put, toxic masculinity is a harmful mindset about what a man is or should be, what is manly, for example, "men shouldn't cry or they're weak". both men and women can say this but it's still about masculinity. i didn't really understand why he mentioned toxic masculinity here, because the girl doesn't tell what a man should be, but i guess you can see the statement "men are only nice with women they're attracted to, and get annoyed when talking to women they're not attracted to" as a harmful image of men, therefore the term is applicable
It's toxic masculinity because she's repeating the logic of manosphere bros.
@@СэрМелифаро-т1т It must be noted that "toxic masculinity" is a political slogan meant to push curtain ideas about what men should be over others. I would ask what evidence you have that something like male stoicism is harmful since that was your example?
I will point out that many types of therapy that have generally been accepted as effective for women are ineffective on men. Many times we look at how we personally would feel or be effected and project it onto others. Based on what I have heard from several psychologists about gender differences in therapy techniques, that projection doesn't work to understand the other gender. The criticism of male stoicism often comes from this same projection, since the stoicism in women is generally unhealthy it is assumed to be bad in men too.
You can’t trust video where they are play video games or preparing food while telling you something g I related
She's waving that knife around in a way I wouldn't wanna be around her.
I like the McClellan reference. I’ll get some coffee now.
This is what we in the humanities would call “science fiction” but for social media medium. Imagine reading, like, “A Princess of Mars” in 1912 and because it’s presented as a first person narration travelogue believing there are people living on Mars. In 1912.
ah yes, science and bias. my favorite cocktail
This guy seems annoyed and irritated.
This girlie? Shez uncouth, yelling not discussing AND cutting fruit with a large knife and not watching!
I genuinely forget that gender stereotypes and 'differences' between men and women exist sometimes, that's how little sense they make to me. Also if I was annoyed or irritated by someone I was interacting with, why would I be speaking to them in the first place?
Well said. I'm skeptical of any study on sex differences. Most studies are complete nonsense anyway.
I want to make a smart and insightful comment but I am spent but will not remember watching this wonderful video at a later date
Her knife skills scares me.
As a woman who loves my husband my eyes ARE only on him and I have NO PROBLEM doing so. You men are NOT RIGHT> Something is seriously wrong with your brains. If you think you love someone, you will NOT BE attracted to other women. Women don't lust for other men, and men should not lust for other women. Matthew 5 : 28:
"But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart."
Do not come disagreeing with me. This is the Biblical law on marriage. I didn't write it. Question why you're so unhappy guys,
No storybook rules over my real world relationships. The rules of my relationships are decided between me and my partners alone.
@@SaltyMaud , No woman likes that. If she does, she isn't serious about you. Stop commenting on my comments.
@@CS_Star-w4i Good thing your beliefs influence my relationships as little as your silly book does. Stop commenting this delusional proselytizing nonsense if you don't want comment responses.
@@SaltyMaud , Why would you want to marry someone if you don't believe in it then?
@@SaltyMaud , Why want to marry if you don't believe in the religion that created it?
Bro doesn't rub tartrazine on his bald head
In MRI studies you can actually tell the difference between male and female brains around 95% of the time. That's just MRI which does not show smaller structures or function. Dealing with sexist attitudes is one thing, but this feels more like science denial. People's rights should not be based on science they should be based on morality.
This is a really balanced take. My only question would be, do you think those brain differences are natural or do you think that growing up with male/female socialization changes parts of the brain through nurture?
Erudite, balanced, analytical, commendable vid. Science is indeed about drawing conclusions from the data and is evidence- based. Whereas rumour, certain types of delusion and some dogma seems to start with the conclusion and cherry-picks only evidence that agrees. Maybe I'm a little "ministry of stating the obvious", but I'm a simple mind.
Star of david detected. Opinion discarded
Hello, would you mind crediting the video being talked about? Maybe a link in the description or the title of the video or the person?
Calling masculinity toxic only pushes men further right and into the arms of people like Tate. Well done for helping to bring about a new wave of misogyny.
Love the video and the shout out to Dan McClellan.
Don't lie. There are differences in brains that are biological.
What about grey matter and white matter?
As much as we like to pretend we are different species, Women are from Mars, Men are from Venus type of mentality, the differences are not genetic, but social and biological in that we are radically different in physical strength (this does matter in our perceptions and security in the world). We over generalize social cues and under percieve words, language and tone of voice to convey intention, which is why we rarely get along between the sexes as far as perception of the world (we are the subject, so we see ourselves through the eyes of other people, and this feels like a harsh reality sometimes), but I think at least we do agree that our feelings are valid (we know what they are) and our bodies are free from oppression or suppression (we have the freedom to choose our mate). We want the same thing biologically (connection), but we rarely want the same thing cognitively (protection). If we are lonely in our mind, we cannot attach biologically, so we pull people in to be lonely with us instead of coming up to connect at a basic level of human need (physical touch). Men view their world from the outside in, and women view their world from the inside out.
that indeed does apply to the majority of men/boys and girls/women w/ clear outliners
Awesome.
All good until you start about toxic feminity wich exists and as a hypersensetive man i´am not only able to explain it to men and women but also find it in every days life and interactions.
BOTH Sexes have their problems in interactig with each other, something i thought we would have figured out since we know the others sex for thousands of years? It´s not that simple.
But when you over anylize and therefore over complicate things.... no wonder people don´t know what to do anymore.
I have been called toxic for not agreeing with someone and then i was blamed cuz white and male, and we all know that kind of person right? RIGHT? No, you don´t.
If you feel the need to speak about toxic masculinity we also have to speak about toxic femininity or just don´t even bother.
I wish you'd let her speak for herself instead of constantly interrupting. Nonetheless it's incredibly disheartening to see women perpetuating the narrative of the patriarchy, that women are threats to intimacy.
Bro can I just watch TH-cam? I hate when shit like this pops up on me feed.
This girl need some therapy
> claims gendered brain is shaky, sexist stuff
> talks about toxic masculinity as something de facto real
What? I'm not quite sure what your point is supposed to be, if you're suggesting those two are related then that's a logical fallacy. Not to mention the fact that toxic masculinity definitely is a real, proven thing, it's just that (especially nowadays) it's overused improperly.
@@mitchratka3661because if one gender is toxically expressed, there must be something different about the brains of the genders. Otherwise, we have a new problem where the same structure, functioning the same way, is producing a different result. As it stands, the truth is *we don’t know*. We don’t understand the physical means behind thought, how could we begin to accurately describe differences or similarities in things we do not understand? Neuroscience is underdeveloped and mystic.
@@sladepullman-stewart9162 ok I might just be tired, but honestly I don't understand most of that. As for why the brain would be operating differently based on the sexes, or genders it doesn't matter, that could literally just be due to us considering ourselves one or the other; I mean seriously we can have major physical impacts on our own brain due to THINKING we took medicine, that's what a placebo is, so the fact that gender/sex is one of the MOST influenced aspects in terms of how we think/express ourselves means it's very likely it has nothing to do with being born either gender/sex and everything to do with environment. Probably not 100-0, but I think it's overwhelming a majority that it's basically negligible, so with rounding maybe 100-0 lol
I'm pretty sure toxic masculinity is meant we're raised by the society thinking that's what masculinity is. Kind of how we think about other gendered brain. So i don't see how his 2 statements contradict one another.
@@mitchratka3661toxic masculinity and feminity both come from nurture within our society, not from our brains' nature
…..so, there are no fundamental differences between men and women? Yeah okay. Heh
No fundamental NEUROLOGICAL differences between men and women. Obviously, since humans are a sexually dimorphic species, men and women are different, but there are very few neurological differences between men and women. Heck, even the basic idea of women leaning more emotional and men leaning more logical has exceptions. My own mother is a logical thinker, so I know at least one exception.
@@ArrogantWriter oh I agree with that -it makes sense neurologically. I suppose we have just been so inundated with ridiculous information that there are no differences between the sexes that I’m ready to throw in the towel on society. Heh
Let her speak beta
Man you deleted my comment I didn't say anything bigoted... why .... I spent great time thinking and writing it... man...
It was probably YT, they censor a lot of things
Especially if you're on a "list"
It was probably TH-cam. They automatically hide/censor comments sometimes.
He is one of those guys that if anyone has a comment that says other then him in the video, he will remove it. He removed all my previous comment's before. They don't want to hear the truth on the subject.
@@CS_Star-w4i
You know, if he is removing comments, it's probably to counteract uneducated drivel and its misleading effects on vulnerable people scrolling through the comment section.
Freedom of speech doesn't mean that every idea is equally worth considering, you know. It just means that you're not going to be thrown in jail for stating your beliefs.
@@Mage_Chartreux , Freedom of speech stops when it impedes on another's freedoms.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it something like the male brain has 10 times as much gray matter as a female brain and the female brain has 6.5 times as much white matter as the male brain, The female brain is 10% smaller in total volume, but has 20% more connective tissue between the left and the right hemisphere. On top of all this, the male brain is vertically wired with more dominance to the left hemisphere where the female brain is horizontally wired because of the connective tissue between the left and right hemisphere. And male Brains use more occipital Activity and have more frontal lobe access. It seems to me that You and your community Of Gender neutralists Are making up this bullshit that there is no difference between the mail and the female brain. When there is Huge significant differences.
These are averages that get presented as binary universals. That's exactly what we're talking about. You don't understand what's being said.
Why do you think the "gender neutralist" crowd, as you call us, is also pro-trans? We're not saying this stuff is meaningless, we're saying it's far too complex and varied in individuals to set up a binary norm based on averages.
Got to wonder about the possible relationship this gray matter thing and how the reduction in gray matter during pregnancy and recently after birth works.
Gross oversimplification: pregnant people (who tend to be women) see a temporary reduction in gray matter through neural pruning. This doesn’t mean they get less intelligent, it means that their thoughts are faster and more efficient, which might be important in taking care of a small and fragile human being that needs things all the time.
Also, how do trans and intersex folks factor into this? What do their brains look like?
lmao
Not sure it counts as a "fundamental" difference, but there is a significant difference in the size of INAH-3, right?
I'm no expert but my understanding is that some dimorphic differences are common but nothing is universal, and also that different morphology doesn't necessarily mean any particular difference in intelligence or personality.
As soon as someone uses the term toxic masculinity their credibility goes straight to the trash.
You only think like that because your own credibility is trash
@@bertberw8653 The fact that you think defending his beliefs makes you better than men shows your credibility is far worse than his.
You don't understand what toxic masculinity is, and likely have some preconceived notion of it you were fed by antifeminists. It's very common.
If you actually spent any time looking at scholarly sources discussing toxic masculinity, you'd realize that:
1. It's not some anti-man hate-all-men philosophy. And toxic masculinity does not mean "masculinity is toxic"
2. You'd realize examples of toxic masculinity and its enforcement are obvious and highly normalized in society. It's not something you can argue doesn't exist because it's super obvious to see every day.
Ever see people get super upset and very performative about what they would do to pedophiles? Ever see people argue that women shouldn't have the right to vote? The fact that 1 in 3 women are a victim of sexual assault or rape kinda proves that toxic masculinity exists.
Now: since we know it exists, we can work to address it.
But the fact that the moment you see "toxic masculinity" and decide there's no credibility. That means you are refusing to accept real problems in the world exist and are unwilling to engage in good faith.
Toxic masculinity exists but you use the phrase as a thought terminating cliché.
You shouldn't use thought terminating clichés. It's bad to prevent yourself from thinking.
@@ldobehardcorewell put, thanks
What about toxic femininity? I mean the women who baby talks their men and treats them like kids. Get's with multiple men to be "like the boys". Cheats like men, goes to bars and genuinely acts like because she is a woman she can do what she wants... is that okay?> Generally toxic masculinity, are men who hurts others mentally and physically. Most of these kind of men wont let people have emotions. If you're a man, you just ost your mom, and the toxic masculine man will say something like "Suck it up you girl... rub some dirt in it.... Men don't cry" or something like that. Kinda how you said "e term toxic masculinity their credibility goes straight to the trash." That is toxic as you are ignoring someone's emotions on the subject. Toxic masculinity often glorifies aggression or violence as a way to solve problems or assert power. There’s pressure to always be in control and to dominate others, especially in relationships, which can lead to toxic or abusive dynamics.. for example, not letting her leave is a big one. This is why there are soo many programs out there to help "free" women in that situation. There’s often disdain for anything perceived as feminine, including the devaluation of women and the rejection of men who don’t conform to traditional masculine roles, often manifesting in sexist or homophobic behavior. It may also involve the belief that men should be sexually aggressive or that they are entitled to sex, which can foster unhealthy attitudes toward consent and relationships.
Oh, I suppose you think you can mansplain neuroscience because you have a PhD? That somehow makes you better than some rando on tiktok cutting a mango while rambling on about her unbiased scientific education that justifies how men (and probably women) find her annoying? Who's side am I on? I can't even tell anymore.
it sounds like you are trying to take the opposite extreme stance here and say there are no differences between genders
i hope thats not the case as anyone can see the behavioral differences clear as day and we all know that behavior is predominately determined by the brain
So yes massive differences but obviously not the ones shes alluding to.
I can say with a 95% confidence interval that men only have friendships with the opposite sex if it is a romantic or physical interest. Otherwise, he is just a colleague. Make no mistakes ladies, that sweet and stingless bee is actually just hiding the fact that he would sting you if you let him
Buddy, the only person you can talk about with 95% accuracy is yourself. This isn't a "man" problem, it's a misogynist problem. Sex isn't "stinging" someone. If you characterize it as inherently predatory like that, it says a lot about how you view women and WHY you can't genuinely be friends with any of them.
@@laurelgardner F me. Bees are a predator species now, LOL. Above all else is the bumblebee, the top of the food chain. Beware of the bee, it might make you cease to be.
@@waltersoares4264Bees die after stinging...
better than mantis
That was a clear and concise rebuttal to social media copy pasta slop. Thanks for clearing that up so completely.
Truthfully, I only wanted to comment how you choice of glasses emphasizes how your nose and facial hair look like a 🥸 disguise.
1:58 You can't assume the alternative hypothesis!
I have seen a few others that agree with you but none put it so simply as you did. Well said.