I described it many times in the support groups as feeling like a ghost observing the life I once had. You nailed it, Dan. Thank God our bodies were designed to heal, even from significant injury.
For me it was the psychological aspect of having regret that I had taken the drugs for 15 years and wasted my life by not living life the way I thought I should have. That I wasted my life. After withdrawing for 6+ months I don’t have that feeling anymore. What I’m saying is, it does get better. I had the sense of mourning that I didn’t live experiences to their fullest like my relationships with loved ones who are now gone. That was very difficult. Great video Dan. Thank you.
@@donna6165 When my agoraphobia lessened to the point I could go out of my house I cherished the light breeze and sunshine whereas in my past I never even noticed it. I vowed to remain this way and have for the most part. We get three lives with this drug. Before benzos, on them, and what we decide to be after we get off. I am molding myself into a kind, compassionate, serving, grateful person. Wish me luck!
Wow…how poignant: …”three lives.” 😮YES. I feel you, Jim. Hearing music, omg…feeling it? 🎶 Astounding in the After. Our senses come alive. I wish you all the luck and strength I can spare. Keep Going, brother; it’s all waiting. ❤️🩹
Wow so so true, I'm on a slow taper,time flies buy, 1 min,u get out of bed6.30,before you know it,is midday, I'm on a slow taper 2 ml,of Diaz per month, I'm on 18 ml per day, but some days take 10 ml,at most,I'm scared of coming off,more than scared, I've stopped dead in the past, ended up in hospital nutted off, don't know if I'll be able to get through next time ,I have a good key worker, worst drug in the world to my knowledge, rawwwww, and thank you,from the UK
Just remember, all feelings are temporary! Whether for a minute or a month, you change every second as in getting better. After 6 mths off I have made leaps and bounds in recovery. I’m driving again. I’m socializing again. I can go out without fear (as long as it’s fairly close and not an hour’s drive, etc)
It’s a horrendous thing to go through. You’re a strong person though to go through a taper like you are. Big time impressed with anyone doing what you are.
Dean, one breath. One Step. And, then the next. 🌬️Breathe and do the next, right thing. Not thinking too far ahead, if you can. It takes practice, brother. 👐Be gentle with yourself and allow the process; fighting against it or “intellectualizing it” only prolongs the suffering/amount of time stuck. You’re going to feel better. ❤️🩹
Yes, B. 💯. We certainly do meet ourselves on this harrowing/stunning/horrible/beautiful Trek. As above, so below. ✊🏻 We got this, Fam. Joyful Sunday to you, brother. ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
Thank you, Dan. I'm so happy I found your channel! Going through a long taper right now, on my own. No outside support except for my 2 month call with my psych. Almost done.
I used bennzo for sleep. i attempted to stop twice, but my insomnia came back that I couldn't sleep for several weeks. I almost got fired. I'll try to stop again and hopefully my brain learns to sleep like a normal person.
Elusive since Elementary days. I'm a failure because of this disease. Benzo saved me as I get to keep my job. I don't miss work anymore and regained good cognitive function..But I'll give it one more shot to get out of benzo and be completely drug fee. I don't want quetiapijne as an alternative. It gives me brain fog and extremely sedated. That medicine should be banned...kidding.
19 years, Xanax prescribed for sleep; I’ll be 5 years free this year on December 23rd. Hitting tolerance, w/d, tapering and subsequent neutralizing of symptoms was excruciating and my sleep is still a…challenge.🥹 It’s improving, absolutely. The most growth has come in this last year. Was just w/Family; they all commented on my clarity and energy. Stay strong. You can and you must. Sending patience, strength and love to you. ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
@@donna6165 Thanks for the insights. I'm suffering from Benzo backlash at the moment. I guess this is what we call drug tolerance. Called in sick. I'm gonna lose my job really hahaha. I can do this! Hahaha
I wish I never took any psychiatric drug, I was going a tough time with a medical diagnosis and all the emotions that go with it and my doctor said I was depressed I wasn’t depressed I was stressed and he also put me on Clonazapam and tried to get of both not at the same time, and failed because it was another hard time in my life when my mom died and my brother in-law died by suicide and my other brother in-law died of cancer it’s been a hell, when I tried the first time to get off clonazapam low dose my legs felt so weak. Went back to original dose, scared the crap out of me. I hate my life right now stuck on pills that should of never gone on. But trusted my doctor. I’m beyond angry he didn’t tell be it should be short term I’ve been on Clonazapam for 11 years and not going through that again. And the antidepressant I’m on makes me groggy. Tried to lower the dose and couldn’t sleep, what the heck is in these drugs.
Your grief-1000% normal and NECESSARY, your humaness was medicated away. All the deep tragedy and loss your body/mind and spirit needed to allow/process and then release? This which was essential? That process was thwarted, over and over again; my heart broke a little reading your Story. “ Med up and keep it moving.” Sickening. Imagine if we’d only be allowed our humanness. Not always rushing through, to “get over” and hurrying through, never to feel woe or inconvenience others with our normal, human sorrows . This is disgraceful; I’m sorry, Sis. Please stay strong. You deserve peace and contentment. 🙏🏻🎣❤️🩹
Yes, so much this! When I was taking Seroquel for sleep, the days would speed by! I had terrible memory issues too because of it but I was not really suffering yet, so I didn’t pay attention to it. When I was given compazine and then ripped off the seroquel, time instantly came to a crawl. 10 months off now and still have this slow time issue. I’ve found that if you have dpdr in this as well, it tends to go hand and hand with the time issue. It’s all awful. I can’t wait until the time thing normalizes again.
Hi ya Dan. Thank you for your kind voice of reason I’m still going through the fog (dr/dp). Hope it ends soon. Hope you’re doing well. 😎 Paula. Had a session with you thanks.
Hey Paula! I’m sorry you’re still in it. I hope the dp/dr begins to resolve for you. It can be really debilitating and frustrating to experience. Hope your doing well today.
Im so messed up in withdrawal at 10 months off that i dont notice if time is going fast or slow. I took klonopin for over 20 years so i have no idea what normal is. Thanks
I used to have an amazing sense and concept of time before benzos. I knew what time it was without even looking at a clock. But things are very blurry now, especially my short term memory. Time seems to be absolutely flying by, tbh, which is actually a good thing while i am tapering. I’m sure this amnesia effect will diminish once I’m finally off them and have my old brain back. It’s not just with time either, but also things I’ve said or things people have said to me. My short term memory just isn’t as sharp, and i think that impacts my perception of time.
Yes! Time go so slow sloth like and we need to taper sloth like lol . I use to smoke heroine and dealt with relapses, withdrawals cold turkey and it was super tourture and suffering ! I had to go on methadone drink and be on it for yrs n yrs and eventually got back my life. But present time now I am on venlafaxine, about 4yrs and out of the fucking blue I knew I was going in terrible withdrawals from venlafaxine because it was the exact same feeling as heroine withdrawals I had to go through hell n back , the medication didn’t work anymore and taking tiny beads out doing2% taper and it’s been 6months and still hell and some days a little tolerable . I can say from experience this fucking venlafaxine drug med iatrogenic harm injury is way worse than Heroine withdrawals and cold turkey! BUT also heroine was fucking hell and back too. Both are the devil .
You explained it so well. It's awful and empty and scary
I know that feeling
Yes it’s haunting
Agreed, Beth. ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
It's more than time Lost, it's a whole lot of stuff that's real bad, and i include gaslighting by doctors amogst that.
You’re absolutely right, unfortunately.
Yes they do
I described it many times in the support groups as feeling like a ghost observing the life I once had. You nailed it, Dan. Thank God our bodies were designed to heal, even from significant injury.
Great description!
A ghost? Ohhh, wow, what a fitting analogy. Sadly. :-/
For me it was the psychological aspect of having regret that I had taken the drugs for 15 years and wasted my life by not living life the way I thought I should have. That I wasted my life. After withdrawing for 6+ months I don’t have that feeling anymore. What I’m saying is, it does get better.
I had the sense of mourning that I didn’t live experiences to their fullest like my relationships with loved ones who are now gone. That was very difficult.
Great video Dan. Thank you.
“…sense of mourning.” Beautifully devastating and accurate 3 words, Jim. ❤️🩹
@@donna6165 So true Donna Awesome
@@donna6165 When my agoraphobia lessened to the point I could go out of my house I cherished the light breeze and sunshine whereas in my past I never even noticed it. I vowed to remain this way and have for the most part. We get three lives with this drug. Before benzos, on them, and what we decide to be after we get off. I am molding myself into a kind, compassionate, serving, grateful person. Wish me luck!
I know that you mean. I felt the same way. So glad to hear that it’s gotten better for you. 🙏🏻
Wow…how poignant: …”three lives.” 😮YES.
I feel you, Jim. Hearing music, omg…feeling it? 🎶 Astounding in the After. Our senses come alive. I wish you all the luck and strength I can spare. Keep Going, brother; it’s all waiting. ❤️🩹
I have no concept of time as I am healing.
This video and the comments were really comforting❤
They are, Sis. ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
Wow so so true, I'm on a slow taper,time flies buy, 1 min,u get out of bed6.30,before you know it,is midday, I'm on a slow taper 2 ml,of Diaz per month, I'm on 18 ml per day, but some days take 10 ml,at most,I'm scared of coming off,more than scared, I've stopped dead in the past, ended up in hospital nutted off, don't know if I'll be able to get through next time ,I have a good key worker, worst drug in the world to my knowledge, rawwwww, and thank you,from the UK
Just remember, all feelings are temporary! Whether for a minute or a month, you change every second as in getting better. After 6 mths off I have made leaps and bounds in recovery. I’m driving again. I’m socializing again. I can go out without fear (as long as it’s fairly close and not an hour’s drive, etc)
@@jimferrill1790 thank you Jim 😊 🙏
It’s a horrendous thing to go through. You’re a strong person though to go through a taper like you are. Big time impressed with anyone doing what you are.
@philosophicalfishing thank you,but I don't feel it,my reward system is down bro,but thank you for the reply 💯🙏
Dean, one breath. One Step. And, then the next. 🌬️Breathe and do the next, right thing. Not thinking too far ahead, if you can. It takes practice, brother. 👐Be gentle with yourself and allow the process; fighting against it or “intellectualizing it” only prolongs the suffering/amount of time stuck. You’re going to feel better. ❤️🩹
It is in all sense and purpose a rebirth
Yes, B. 💯. We certainly do meet ourselves on this harrowing/stunning/horrible/beautiful Trek. As above, so below. ✊🏻 We got this, Fam. Joyful Sunday to you, brother. ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
Absolutely is!!
@@donna6165 If you would like to chat sometime would be awesome. Hope all is well
@@bobbobarino6213Surely would be, Mr. Awesome. Let’s make it happen. 🤝❤️🩹
@@philosophicalfishing happy thanksgiving
I am tapering now. I just want my life back😢
You can do this, and you WILL get your life back, with time. You’ll be so happy once you’re through this.
You are taking It back. 💪🏻Stay focused and determined. It’s not forever. ❤️🩹
I noticed time just going really fast, like the day just disappears.
Yup, exactly.
Thank you, Dan. I'm so happy I found your channel! Going through a long taper right now, on my own. No outside support except for my 2 month call with my psych. Almost done.
Glad you found us! This is a great community of people on this channel!
Welcome, Sis. We are Here. 🙏🏻❤️🩹🎣
I used bennzo for sleep. i attempted to stop twice, but my insomnia came back that I couldn't sleep for several weeks. I almost got fired. I'll try to stop again and hopefully my brain learns to sleep like a normal person.
Sleep becomes elusive for so many.
Elusive since Elementary days. I'm a failure because of this disease. Benzo saved me as I get to keep my job. I don't miss work anymore and regained good cognitive function..But I'll give it one more shot to get out of benzo and be completely drug fee. I don't want quetiapijne as an alternative. It gives me brain fog and extremely sedated. That medicine should be banned...kidding.
19 years, Xanax prescribed for sleep; I’ll be 5 years free this year on December 23rd. Hitting tolerance, w/d, tapering and subsequent neutralizing of symptoms was excruciating and my sleep is still a…challenge.🥹 It’s improving, absolutely. The most growth has come in this last year. Was just w/Family; they all commented on my clarity and energy. Stay strong. You can and you must. Sending patience, strength and love to you. ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
@@donna6165 Thanks for the insights. I'm suffering from Benzo backlash at the moment. I guess this is what we call drug tolerance. Called in sick. I'm gonna lose my job really hahaha. I can do this! Hahaha
Try turmeric,at night give it a few days to build up in your body,let it get into ur system, it works for me,good luck 😉 👍
I wish I never took any psychiatric drug, I was going a tough time with a medical diagnosis and all the emotions that go with it and my doctor said I was depressed I wasn’t depressed I was stressed and he also put me on Clonazapam and tried to get of both not at the same time, and failed because it was another hard time in my life when my mom died and my brother in-law died by suicide and my other brother in-law died of cancer it’s been a hell, when I tried the first time to get off clonazapam low dose my legs felt so weak. Went back to original dose, scared the crap out of me. I hate my life right now stuck on pills that should of never gone on. But trusted my doctor. I’m beyond angry he didn’t tell be it should be short term I’ve been on Clonazapam for 11 years and not going through that again. And the antidepressant I’m on makes me groggy. Tried to lower the dose and couldn’t sleep, what the heck is in these drugs.
I’m so sorry you’ve been through all this. Please be gentle with yourself. You didn’t know what to do at the time.
Your grief-1000% normal and NECESSARY, your humaness was medicated away. All the deep tragedy and loss your body/mind and spirit needed to allow/process and then release? This which was essential? That process was thwarted, over and over again; my heart broke a little reading your Story. “ Med up and keep it moving.” Sickening. Imagine if we’d only be allowed our humanness. Not always rushing through, to “get over” and hurrying through, never to feel woe or inconvenience others with our normal, human sorrows . This is disgraceful; I’m sorry, Sis. Please stay strong. You deserve peace and contentment. 🙏🏻🎣❤️🩹
Yes, so much this! When I was taking Seroquel for sleep, the days would speed by! I had terrible memory issues too because of it but I was not really suffering yet, so I didn’t pay attention to it. When I was given compazine and then ripped off the seroquel, time instantly came to a crawl. 10 months off now and still have this slow time issue. I’ve found that if you have dpdr in this as well, it tends to go hand and hand with the time issue. It’s all awful. I can’t wait until the time thing normalizes again.
Yeah dp/dr affected my sense of time as well.
Hi ya Dan. Thank you for your kind voice of reason I’m still going through the fog (dr/dp). Hope it ends soon. Hope you’re doing well. 😎 Paula. Had a session with you thanks.
Hey Paula! I’m sorry you’re still in it. I hope the dp/dr begins to resolve for you. It can be really debilitating and frustrating to experience. Hope your doing well today.
Did you say 13 years? Try 30 years! I was placed on Xanax in 1993 and now in 2023 aged 65, I am still on Benzo's. @@philosophicalfishing
Sending you continued patience and strength, Paula. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ( We’ve) ever done, but we got this. 💪🏻 We are healing. 😌 ❤️🩹🎣
Im so messed up in withdrawal at 10 months off that i dont notice if time is going fast or slow. I took klonopin for over 20 years so i have no idea what normal is. Thanks
I remember feeling that way for a long time too. I had no clue what normal was either. I clearly remember saying that same thing all the time.
I can totally relate.This is V by the way
Hi, William. 👐 Thinking of you and sending love and strength. 🙏🏻❤️🩹🎣
Unfortunately I did a very long taper without knowing , I know its better to go slow but I added like 1.5 years More waste of time 😢
The main thing is getting off safely. I know it’s horrible to have to take so long but that’s usually better than going too fast.
thank you!
@@philosophicalfishing
I feel like I”m a bird with a broken wing….I can’t fly …like others.
Awww, you will. I thought I was a lost cause too.
❤
I can relate to this feeling❤
@@katrinamenzies9398Katrina ❤️🩹🎣🙏🏻
I used to have an amazing sense and concept of time before benzos. I knew what time it was without even looking at a clock. But things are very blurry now, especially my short term memory. Time seems to be absolutely flying by, tbh, which is actually a good thing while i am tapering. I’m sure this amnesia effect will diminish once I’m finally off them and have my old brain back. It’s not just with time either, but also things I’ve said or things people have said to me. My short term memory just isn’t as sharp, and i think that impacts my perception of time.
I can relate to all you have said Dan. Another helpful video.😊❤
Thanks Julie!✌🏻❤️
Cocoon. Inside a cocoon, Brother. Separate. 😔
Yes! Time go so slow sloth like and we need to taper sloth like lol . I use to smoke heroine and dealt with relapses, withdrawals cold turkey and it was super tourture and suffering ! I had to go on methadone drink and be on it for yrs n yrs and eventually got back my life. But present time now I am on venlafaxine, about 4yrs and out of the fucking blue I knew I was going in terrible withdrawals from venlafaxine because it was the exact same feeling as heroine withdrawals I had to go through hell n back , the medication didn’t work anymore and taking tiny beads out doing2% taper and it’s been 6months and still hell and some days a little tolerable . I can say from experience this fucking venlafaxine drug med iatrogenic harm injury is way worse than Heroine withdrawals and cold turkey! BUT also heroine was fucking hell and back too. Both are the devil .
Yeah opiate withdrawals are wretched but medication damage/withdrawal was 50x worse.
@@philosophicalfishing True! Sigh…