It is one of the stereotypes of us lot, along with the stiff upper lip, plummy accent and sexual repression, pip pip old chap sort of thing. I swear some still think we live in the 1800s here. :-)
"Whisper in a dead man's ear doesn't make it real." FUCKING EPIC. this was a great episode, as was the entire series really. I have it dvd but sometimes you get a song stuck in your head and you just have to hear it. plus I suppose I loved the whole Buffy/Spike love drama. I really miss this show.
I love how this song conveys how conflicted he is over his feelings for Buffy. He's obsessed with her (not sure if you can say he's legitimately in love with her at this point), but he knows its wrong to feel the way he does. Every verse he flip flops between telling her to bugger off, and then getting on his knees to tell her he'll be her willing slave. He knows that without a soul she'll never accept him, but he can't let her go so he's stuck in this limbo. Later in the season he tells her things like that she belongs with him in the dark, because he knows the only way to have her is if she joins him there. Then he gets his soul, and realizes that what he did before wasn't actually love. Love isn't dragging someone down for your own selfish needs, it's building and lifting them up even if it means letting them go. It's loving them separately from anything you might get in return, just because of who they are. Ironically once he is finally able to do that, he's worthy of being loved by her in return.
I would argue that he is in love with her at this point. His sobbing when she died, his reaction to seeing her alive again. This seems more like love than just obsession to me.
@@Rkenton48 James Marsters got some training from Anthony Head on the accent. By the way, both of them read audiobooks and Anthony Head's voice is just as soothing and amazing. He could read the phone book for all I care.
I still love that end part, after all that "so, you're not staying then" lol that and his lines in Walk Through Fire gets me too. Spike was such an iconic character. Team Spike!
LYRICS! (Spike) I died So many years ago But you can make me feel Like it isn't so And why you come to be with me I think I finally know mmm-mmm You're scared Ashamed of what you feel And you can't tell the ones you love You know they couldn't deal Whisper in a dead man's ear It doesn't make it real That's great But I don't wanna play 'Cause being with you touches me More than I can say And since I知 only dead to you I知 saying stay away and Let me rest in peace Let me rest in peace Let me get some sleep Let me take my love and bury it In a hole 6-foot deep I can lay my body down But I can't find my, sweet release So let me rest in peace You know, You got a willing slave And You just love to play the thought That you might misbehave But Till you do, I'm telling you Stop visiting my grave Let me rest in peace I know I should go But I follow you like a man possessed There's a traitor here beneath my breast And it hurts me more than you've ever guessed If my heart could beat, it would break my chest but I can see you're unimpressed So leave me be and Let me rest in peace Let me get some sleep Let me take my love and bury it Im a hole 6-foot deep I can lay my body down But I can't find my sweet release Let me rest in peace Why won't you Let me rest in peace?
The camera angles when he drops do his knees in front of her, ‘You know, you’ve got a willing slave’ are perfection. The way it points up at her slightly off centre is a great portrayal of how desperate he is and the emotion on her face is incredible. Gah. I’m a sucker for a good angle!😂
This was my childhood and I'm feeling nostalgic. I always wanted someone to serenade me with this. I also had my mom burn it onto a CD so I could play it in my room on repeat. I miss those times
Put this on a loop for my wallpaper . . . The way he sinks to his knees, the way he turns his head down, and lowers his eyelids; I could change the ending, if I were there; it certainly impressed me!
I enjoy reading the fan reactions to Spike's character because so many different interpretations of love and humanity and what it means to have a soul come up. Spike is the perfect catalyst for that conversation because he is the gray area in a black & white world of demon vs human. Humans have souls but some still cause mayhem to others. It's presumed that in this world of heaven vs hell, humans alone are capable of redemption, a sort of religious view of human potential. Demons are supposed to be evil, irredeemable. And yet, along comes Spike; the demon who redeemed himself. It's compelling stuff. And he's damned funny. Perhaps especially because his character wasn't meant to stick around beyond 5 episodes, but Marsters was so magnetic that they had to keep him and work with the dichotomy they created in the romantic poet from hell.
I really love the lines "I died so many years ago but you can make it feel like it isn't so" & "Cause being with you touches me more than I can say". Buffy made Spike & Angel both feel alive.
Love how people comment the lyrics to these songs. Like what do they think... That we didnt watch this episode thirty times and that we dont know all of the lyrics by heart. Jeesh
Can I just say my fav bit of this whole episode is this song but the best bit of this song is right at the end when he told her to sod off for the last time he just goes so your not staying then well no brains trust you just told her to sod off
J'suis mort Depuis tellement longtemps Même si par toi j'imagine que je suis vivant Pourquoi tu es venu à moi Enfin je le comprend Mmh mmh Tu as peur De ton cœur qui s'anime Car tu ne sais comment avouer Cet amour difficile Aux morts, tu dis des mots doux Ils restent morts c'est tout D'accord Mais je n'veux plus jouer Ta présence est une souffrance Plus que je ne voudrais Mais comme pour toi je ne suis qu'un mort Je préfère t'éviter J'veux reposer en paix Reposer en paix Dormir au cimetière Cacher mon amour, l'enfouir Au creux de la Terre Si j'contrôle mon pauvre corps Mon âme se tourmente à jamais J'veux reposer en paix Tu sais Je suis comme un esclave Et tu adores te prendre au jeu D'un amour plein d'entrave Mais s'il te plait J'suis pas un jouet Oublie moi au passage J'veux reposer en paix Je veux dire adieu Pourtant je te suis Tu es ma faiblesse Quelque chose en moi m'inquiète, m'oppresse Et me fait plus mal Que je ne le confesse Si mon cœur ne bat plus Tu le mets en pièces Mas tu t'en fiche Et moi j'encaisse Alors laisse moi Reposer en paix Dormir au cimetière Cacher mon amour, l'enfouir Au creux d'la terre Si j'contrôle mon pauvre corps Mon âme se tourmente en secret J'veux reposer en paix Mais laisse moi reposer en paix
La traduction français est assez mauvaise. On sacrifie le sens pour les rimes. C'est dommage. Enfin l'élément qui me dérange le plus c'est "MON ÂME SE TOURMENTE EN SECRET" Non... Il n'a pas d'âme lol. Ils auraient pu trouver mieux.
This song made me love James Marsters, and then the Dresden Files audiobooks hooked me on him. The only good parts of the live action DragonBall movie were him as Piccolo and the credits (mid credit scene may or may not have had him in it).
Indeed. This is why Alyson Hannigan (Willow) had like three sung lines ("I think this like is mostly filler...") the entire episode, and Michelle Trachtenberg (Dawn) not that many more ("I'm fifteen so this queen thing's illegal."). Neither one had the singing voices of the others, so they mainly harmonized.
Alicia en el Pais de las Maravillas She had the reaction shot to Buffy telling her she'd pulled Buffy out of heaven. You don't need your own song with a moment looked that.
0:55 , 1:24 , 1:48 and 2:07 This is my favorite episode of the whole series, and that’s saying something considering how great the whole show is. I’m totally Team Spike. I think Buffy and Spike are way better together than Buffy and Angel. Spike loves Buffy with or without a soul and gets his just to prove that he loves her. Angel on the other hand changes completely when he loses his soul.
Well the singing had to do with repressed emotions, so it's likely that it just hadn't triggered in him until he came into contact with Buffy, because she's the only one he suppresses his feelings around.
That face right as he realizes he's starting to sing is like "Bloody hell no really ugh"
It's even better cause he knows its gonna happen so he was like "Get the hell out, noooooo I don't want to sing like a bloody ponce." Lol
Yeah you can see he's really trying to get her out before he starts singing and then he just gets this look like 'oh fuck me i'm singing'
Oh for god's sake...
🤣🤣🤣 i die everytime
Spike is iconic
Spike: Come to serenade me?
Spike starts serenading buffy
if you want something done right, gotta do it yourself.
Spike:
*Sends 3 minutes singing at Buffy to f*** off and leave him alone*
'So...you're not staying then?'
He's meant to be British after all......
PS: I am a Brit.
I mean, I am too? I didn't realise this is apparently classic British behaviour? Lol.
It is one of the stereotypes of us lot, along with the stiff upper lip, plummy accent and sexual repression, pip pip old chap sort of thing. I swear some still think we live in the 1800s here. :-)
Hence "stereotype" :-)
Not as stupid as you claim. :-)
Lmao when they both roll their eyes when he starts singing.
Key word BOTH 🤣🤣
They both look like really r we really doing this
I really love the line “If my heart could beat, it would break my chest”
Me too !! If I can loose 15 pounds this year that quote will be my next tattoo
@@carleeeagleplume7760and, did you lose it?
Who are you ?
I love the way he looks at her when says "And you might misbehave" 👄🖤😻
Just when you thought he couldn't get anymore attractive. dear lord
His voice and accent 😵😵😵
Right 😵
Omg yeeeessss😂😂😂
I love this song. Man he has an amazing voice. Angel is nice but Spike is better. #TeamSpikeForever
Don't take this the wrong way spike is amazing buuuut listen to marsters do Harry Dresden some time.. it's a whole new level of yes
James Marsters is an incredible actor and awesome singer.
I didn't think The Dresden Files could get any better until I found out who narrated the audio books, he really brings the text to life
only in sunnydale would they have a funeral at night lol
alicia dunagan And I love how that’s the weirdest part of the episode.
Maybe I should have my funeral at night
They would do that in Sunnyvale as well. The trailer park boys give no fucks.
All the day slots were booked. :p
@@Bensen669 SunnyDale!...
The two dislikes must be Riley and Angel
guess Giles found out too now ;)
xD Maybe even Dru joined
A and A Amazingness And probably Xander
Add Scott Hope, Parker, Owen, and Halfrek/Cecily who used her two separate accounts to dislike twice. Exes are petty like that.
Don't forget about Harmony
I love how at the beginning of the song, they're both like, "Oh god, here we go!" #BuffySlays20
"Whisper in a dead man's ear doesn't make it real." FUCKING EPIC. this was a great episode, as was the entire series really. I have it dvd but sometimes you get a song stuck in your head and you just have to hear it. plus I suppose I loved the whole Buffy/Spike love drama. I really miss this show.
I love how this song conveys how conflicted he is over his feelings for Buffy. He's obsessed with her (not sure if you can say he's legitimately in love with her at this point), but he knows its wrong to feel the way he does. Every verse he flip flops between telling her to bugger off, and then getting on his knees to tell her he'll be her willing slave. He knows that without a soul she'll never accept him, but he can't let her go so he's stuck in this limbo. Later in the season he tells her things like that she belongs with him in the dark, because he knows the only way to have her is if she joins him there.
Then he gets his soul, and realizes that what he did before wasn't actually love. Love isn't dragging someone down for your own selfish needs, it's building and lifting them up even if it means letting them go. It's loving them separately from anything you might get in return, just because of who they are. Ironically once he is finally able to do that, he's worthy of being loved by her in return.
The juxtaposition of violence and penance shows this conflict perfectly
I would argue that he is in love with her at this point. His sobbing when she died, his reaction to seeing her alive again. This seems more like love than just obsession to me.
Very deeply 🔥
@@LivyRivy it’s as in love as spike can be without a soul definitely but it’s when he gets a soul that their relationship is able to truly progress 💜
@@totaleclipseofmymoon that was the best spoiler ive ever read thanks mam
Oh my god Spike is wearing the same outfit in this as he did in the episode that they were "engaged" beautiful
Wait really?? That's brilliant
@@axelthelad right I found that fact quite amusing and oddly fitting
I love that episode! It is funny and they look so happy! Buffy even sheds a few tears when she accepts Spike's proposal and the look in his eyes...
@@axeltheladthank you for pointing that out. It makes it even better
I love his voice
Devyn Etling same
Husky Bros ikr
He reads audiobooks - The Jim Butcher series 'The Dresden Files'
What's funny is that he isn't British. Giles is the only British actor, and he loved Spike's accent, saying that it was Yorkshire-ish.
@@Rkenton48 James Marsters got some training from Anthony Head on the accent. By the way, both of them read audiobooks and Anthony Head's voice is just as soothing and amazing. He could read the phone book for all I care.
"If my heart could beat it would break my chest" 💕
Not the lyrics😂😂
@@Zodareal1 it is though lol
@JaimeBeesVids it could*
@JaimeBeesVids god u all are ignorant use common sense...
I still love that end part, after all that "so, you're not staying then" lol that and his lines in Walk Through Fire gets me too. Spike was such an iconic character. Team Spike!
That Mmmmm at the beginning of the song is everything.
I love how he just serenaded her with a song about how she should love him or bugger of and then continues to say “your not staying then?”😂
"Sun sets and she appears..."
LYRICS!
(Spike)
I died
So many years ago
But you can make me feel
Like it isn't so
And why you come to be with me
I think I finally know
mmm-mmm
You're scared
Ashamed of what you feel
And you can't tell the ones you love
You know they couldn't deal
Whisper in a dead man's ear
It doesn't make it real
That's great
But I don't wanna play
'Cause being with you touches me
More than I can say
And since I知 only dead to you
I知 saying stay away and
Let me rest in peace
Let me rest in peace
Let me get some sleep
Let me take my love and bury it
In a hole 6-foot deep
I can lay my body down
But I can't find my, sweet release
So let me rest in peace
You know,
You got a willing slave
And You just love to play the thought
That you might misbehave
But Till you do,
I'm telling you
Stop visiting my grave
Let me rest in peace
I know I should go
But I follow you like a man possessed
There's a traitor here beneath my breast
And it hurts me more than you've ever guessed
If my heart could beat, it would break my chest
but I can see you're unimpressed
So leave me be and
Let me rest in peace
Let me get some sleep
Let me take my love and bury it
Im a hole 6-foot deep
I can lay my body down
But I can't find my sweet release
Let me rest in peace
Why won't you
Let me rest in peace?
Thank u
@@imsickaboutme your welcome
@@MirouSallow your welcome
Haha, I’ve been listening to these a lot. Thanks for giving lyrics to all of them!
@@sofacushion8153 their brilliant, and no problem
I love how the lyric is, “you know you’ve got a willing slave” but it sounds like he’s saying “you’ve got will enslaved”
Either line kinda works
They cut that verse out in the DVD release...
Oh, shit! 😳
@@BookieKillah no they didint-
@@gaydumbass871 Maybe it was the BluRay release then, because it's definitely missing...
so... you're not staying then?
Buffy's face when Spike starts to sing is more than amazing.
The camera angles when he drops do his knees in front of her, ‘You know, you’ve got a willing slave’ are perfection. The way it points up at her slightly off centre is a great portrayal of how desperate he is and the emotion on her face is incredible. Gah. I’m a sucker for a good angle!😂
Love the way he's sorry at the end, that she's not staying. He's such a wonderful actor and good looking man!
James Marsters has always been a great singer.
the way he sounds when he sings "that's great..." is really sexy; this whole song, really
My best friend and I would always rewind that part because of how damn sexy he sounds! 😍
Its 2024 and these songs are still relevant lol
This was my childhood and I'm feeling nostalgic. I always wanted someone to serenade me with this. I also had my mom burn it onto a CD so I could play it in my room on repeat. I miss those times
If I was Buffy, I wouldn't have waited a couple more episodes to act on my feelings.
If I was Buffy I would have insisted he get a soul if he wanted me and I wouldn’t have been emotionally abusive. (She was)
Poor Spike! I remember feeling so bad for him. I still do.
Same :/
am i the only one who really wanted to see the 600-pound chirago demon making like yma sumac?
joshfactor1 Yes. Yes, you are.
I also wanted to see it
Joshfactor1: it would've been great 😀, kinda obscure reference tho'. Most people have never heard Yma.🐂💨💨💨
You and at least 128 people, include me.
Ok who else was like 😱 when they found out his accent wasn’t real and that he was from Texas or something. He is like one of my favorite actors.
Best song of Once more with feelings, IMO.
2:17 wow, Spike really out here confirming the dynamics of their relationship, huh
Put this on a loop for my wallpaper . . . The way he sinks to his knees, the way he turns his head down, and lowers his eyelids; I could change the ending, if I were there; it certainly impressed me!
I enjoy reading the fan reactions to Spike's character because so many different interpretations of love and humanity and what it means to have a soul come up. Spike is the perfect catalyst for that conversation because he is the gray area in a black & white world of demon vs human. Humans have souls but some still cause mayhem to others. It's presumed that in this world of heaven vs hell, humans alone are capable of redemption, a sort of religious view of human potential. Demons are supposed to be evil, irredeemable. And yet, along comes Spike; the demon who redeemed himself. It's compelling stuff. And he's damned funny. Perhaps especially because his character wasn't meant to stick around beyond 5 episodes, but Marsters was so magnetic that they had to keep him and work with the dichotomy they created in the romantic poet from hell.
I love how Spike turns into a vampire just to terrorize the funeral
Also what massive administrative cock up lead to a funeral being held at night in a town full of vampires!?
Spends the whole song telling her to go away, end of song she does then he asks " Hey, where you going?" Lol
He wants to throw her out of his crypt because he is afraid to sing in front of her :-D
2018 and still not over this scene 😍
2019 and still not over this song
Almost 2020, this song can wreck me
2020 and i’m still in love w spike
2021 and still not over this song🥰
2022 soon to be 2023 and still not over it.
I really love the lines "I died so many years ago but you can make it feel like it isn't so" & "Cause being with you touches me more than I can say".
Buffy made Spike & Angel both feel alive.
I just realized something I never noticed; he's all fangy at the pastor but she spins him around he's not fangy.
She makes him human, he tells her at the start
OMG, i totally forgot this used to be my ringtone when I had my Sidekick LX.
That’s genius! 😆
Buffy Season 6 episode 9 will definitely be the episode that I've watched the most!
Best song of the episode hands down!!
1:00-1:01 "bugger me I am not immune...."
And her face, "Fuck, he's not immune."
Ich kann nicht anders. Ich wünschte ich wäre wie er. So stark und maskulin. Mit hartem Rie...en.
"I know I should go, but I follow you like a man possessed..."
Like when you love the one who's friend-zoned you.
"I remain immune- happy to say-" *begins singing*
feel like this song the most in this entire Musical
He was trying to get her out before he burst into song. He knew what was likely to happen.
Love how people comment the lyrics to these songs. Like what do they think... That we didnt watch this episode thirty times and that we dont know all of the lyrics by heart. Jeesh
I swear to god 😂
Yeah
I can see... you're unimpressed... :)
If my heart could beat it would break my chest, but I can see you're unimpressed ❤
For almost a whole minute, he's just like, nope. Nope. You won't get any songs from me, fuckers. Then 0:59
And at 1:01 he's just like: *damnit*
Its not a Joss Whedon show without at least one awesome song number
I wish Buffy would have play triangle or drums to go with Spike’s singing🤔
Joyce: Oh God! I love your rock band, honney!😍👏👏👏
Hahahahahahaha fuckin love it
His cheekbones are amazing
Can I just say my fav bit of this whole episode is this song but the best bit of this song is right at the end when he told her to sod off for the last time he just goes so your not staying then well no brains trust you just told her to sod off
His face omg xD "Ffs I wasn't going to do this."
Spike is HOT
Imagine if they added a cameo of David Boreanaz as Angel singing Oh Mandy :D :D :D
Listening in 2019
Way ahead of you
2020
Who holds a funeral at night? Seriously.
Sunnydale. A place where so many people die they continue burying them into the night.
@ Avery Christy Maybe it was the last wish of the one who died... or its just Sunnydale! ;)
Smiley Lachflash
Sunnydale. The only place that rents graves by the hour.
Or maybe it had something to do with another musical number hahaha
Sunnydale
spike and buffy really good sing this song tougher :)
buffy don't sing in this
+Jamielee Hodgson dosnt
+Jamielee Hodgson i know look nice in video with him while he sing song
Are ok
spike and buffy are perfect for eachother
+laura kiddy
No. Spike belong with Drusilla.
laura kiddy Nothing like attempted rape to make someone perfect for you
He didn't have a soul then. He does now. :)
D. P. Robertz Still immortal and infertile. Tbh he should have remained dead
Have you read the comics? If you're a Spike/Buffy fan, the most recent one will make you very happy :)
I'm the straightest person ever and spike is fucking fit bruh he do be looking fine like that goddamn JAWLINE
James Marsters is a fucking legend!
Who knew crypts had amazing acoustics. :D
You missed the parking ticket song :(
and - They got the mustard out.....
Rkenton48 both are on iTunes though lol
Why is there a funeral in the middle of the night? Have this lot never been to Sunnydale?
J'suis mort
Depuis tellement longtemps
Même si par toi j'imagine que je suis vivant
Pourquoi tu es venu à moi
Enfin je le comprend
Mmh mmh
Tu as peur
De ton cœur qui s'anime
Car tu ne sais comment avouer
Cet amour difficile
Aux morts, tu dis des mots doux
Ils restent morts c'est tout
D'accord
Mais je n'veux plus jouer
Ta présence est une souffrance
Plus que je ne voudrais
Mais comme pour toi je ne suis qu'un mort
Je préfère t'éviter
J'veux reposer en paix
Reposer en paix
Dormir au cimetière
Cacher mon amour, l'enfouir
Au creux de la Terre
Si j'contrôle mon pauvre corps
Mon âme se tourmente à jamais
J'veux reposer en paix
Tu sais
Je suis comme un esclave
Et tu adores te prendre au jeu
D'un amour plein d'entrave
Mais s'il te plait
J'suis pas un jouet
Oublie moi au passage
J'veux reposer en paix
Je veux dire adieu
Pourtant je te suis
Tu es ma faiblesse
Quelque chose en moi m'inquiète, m'oppresse
Et me fait plus mal
Que je ne le confesse
Si mon cœur ne bat plus
Tu le mets en pièces
Mas tu t'en fiche
Et moi j'encaisse
Alors laisse moi
Reposer en paix
Dormir au cimetière
Cacher mon amour, l'enfouir
Au creux d'la terre
Si j'contrôle mon pauvre corps
Mon âme se tourmente en secret
J'veux reposer en paix
Mais laisse moi reposer en paix
Magnifique!
La traduction français est assez mauvaise. On sacrifie le sens pour les rimes. C'est dommage. Enfin l'élément qui me dérange le plus c'est "MON ÂME SE TOURMENTE EN SECRET" Non... Il n'a pas d'âme lol. Ils auraient pu trouver mieux.
This song made me love James Marsters, and then the Dresden Files audiobooks hooked me on him. The only good parts of the live action DragonBall movie were him as Piccolo and the credits (mid credit scene may or may not have had him in it).
I jam out to this song so much. 🤣🤣🥰
Spike: I remain immune happy to say
Me before he’s even started singing:chuckle chuckle BOLLOX
it says in the description spike sung it it was really James Marsters
Progamer189 Minecraft and more As far as I knew, all the songs in this episode were sung by the actors themselves.
James Marsters is the actor
Yes. All the actors sang for real.
Indeed. This is why Alyson Hannigan (Willow) had like three sung lines ("I think this like is mostly filler...") the entire episode, and Michelle Trachtenberg (Dawn) not that many more ("I'm fifteen so this queen thing's illegal."). Neither one had the singing voices of the others, so they mainly harmonized.
Alicia en el Pais de las Maravillas
She had the reaction shot to Buffy telling her she'd pulled Buffy out of heaven. You don't need your own song with a moment looked that.
Why James masters is my favorite
Geile stimme hatte und hat er❤ eins meiner Lieblings Songs ❤
Didn't Spike just say that he was immune to the spell?
So Buffy can make his heart sing....
She ran out of there before she could sing. To hear that song would have been interesting.
0:55 , 1:24 , 1:48 and 2:07 This is my favorite episode of the whole series, and that’s saying something considering how great the whole show is. I’m totally Team Spike. I think Buffy and Spike are way better together than Buffy and Angel. Spike loves Buffy with or without a soul and gets his just to prove that he loves her. Angel on the other hand changes completely when he loses his soul.
if i love spike anymore i will explode
Love love love this.
Best episode and buffy had a lot of great ones
Great Song 👍👍
He' s like "oh fuck I'm not immune..." and she's like "...oh shit it's effected him too..."
just when you thought your daddy issues couldn't get any worse. he does this
James Marsters has a great voice
She always loved spike most...we didn't see it until the finale ❤
two words: sexual. tension.
I love spike
"Let me take my love and bury it..." been there, done that.
I love when Spike refers about Yma Sumac. 2024
Spike:oh so that’s all u just came to bump me for questions. Buffy:what else would I want to bump u for
*Pump*
This is my favourite song in the episode once more with feeling except for the part in the last song we're spike and buffy kiss
loved the rolling head
I remember this song being an octave lower
0:36
Freudian slip.
Grew up on this show as my mam names me and my sister after some characters
spuffy forlife
so was he lying or did he just assume he was immune because it hadn't affected him until then?
Judging by the annoyed look on his face when he starts singing, I'm guessing he had been immune until Buffy walked in.
Well the singing had to do with repressed emotions, so it's likely that it just hadn't triggered in him until he came into contact with Buffy, because she's the only one he suppresses his feelings around.