I’m sitting here with just over 5 days sober. I can’t sleep because of insomnia. This really hit me where it needed to. This is the longest I’ve been sober in over ten years. Here’s to day 6 tomorrow.
The not sleeping thing corrects fairly quickly , and it's one of the worst parts. So just lock that door and throw the key away. The worst part is when you start to feel good again and wonder why you quit in the first place. Then you fall back into it and realize it ,and have to start over. That's where I am at right now
Keep going friend, I'm four months free from alcohol and nicotine and one week without weed after being addicted to all three for most of my twenties. I can feel my personality coming back finally.
Six needs: - comfort/certainty - variety - significance (i.e. sense of purpose) - connection & love - personal growth - contribute beyond ourselves Importance of replacing bad habit with a healthier one Stages before people transform their bad habits: - satiation (repetition makes something not as satisfying) - dissatisfaction (previous bad habit doesn't even feel good anymore) - threshold (you're convinced it will continue not feeling good from now on) - insight (the "truth", you realize you can make some lasting change) - stepping through "the opening" (others can push you through, but you choosing to enter it yourself gives a better chance of long-lasting change)
That's a good list. My favorite one is we're Here to create, to connect and to serve others. You do all three of those and your life can only go right.
Nature gives good rewards constantly, the sun, moon, stars, tree's they're their every single day and nobody is exited about it when it all gives dopamine and drug effects, just admit you were brainwashed then and you are now, why you watch this clown
As a guy who stopped smoking 3,5 years ago, the hardest and worst thing about stopping is the realization that cigarettes crawled themselves into so many nooks and crannies of your life. With coffee, after a meal, with a friend, smoking break, with a beer, when drinking, when sad, when angry, when happy etc. You just realize how much of your life is dictated by a tobacco stick. Not to mention the money you always find for cigarettes, but always don't have for healthy options in your life. You have to distance yourself from the habit for an amount of time to realize just how much damage it does to you, because when you're in that "toxic relationship" with it, you can't comprehend it and that "illusion that you have it under control" is preventing you to accept that you have a problem and stop. Great guest, Theo.
I came to this realization with 🍃 lately, that it's always around. I've smoked every day since I started years ago, and found myself wondering why I felt the need to zone out so often. I always said I never wanted to be on medication because I didn't want to alter my mood yet I've been doing so every day. I stopped drinking and going to events that pressure me to do so but tobacco and 🍃 have been something I have yet to kick
@@lolokaymeg as with any habit, it's a matter of willingness to stop and embrace all the hardships of life without numbing the pain. I completely understand why someone would want to just relax and forget about all the problems, I still do it with alcohol, however I really believe that true profound happiness can be achieved only with a sober mind. Good luck to you and everyone struggling
I will never understand how can someone develop such a disgusting habit such as smoking. To me it's inconceivable that someone would voluntarily smoke. You could pay me a thousand dollars to smoke a single time and I'd gladly refuse it.
@@logomoko78 a lot of it has to do with education, social status and where you live. As much as I agree with your statement now, a lot of people smoke for different reasons. It isn't black and white, in my country, smoking is still acceptable in a lot of situations and a lot of people still smoke. It is a disgusting habit indeed.
I quit drugs a year and a half before I quit drinking. I will have four years on April 6th. I’m such a habit type of a person. I think the first two weeks are the hardest. I was using meth, heroin, and alcohol. Blessings to you on your journey! ❤❤❤
Theo is so in touch with himself that he helps me analyze my bad habits and behavior that I commit without thinking deeply about. It’s like a therapy session listening to him open up
Just like how I got addicted to smoking weed everyday, I got addicted to exercising! You have to really try and reprogram your mind. Once you feel good from working out you’re gonna wanna feel it again, just like chasing a weed high but now instead your chasing the good feelings exercising gives you.
I got into exercising and it filled that weed void. Now when I'm tired at the end of the day its kinda like the feeling of being stoned. Realized I dont need it.
i love theo vons people. ever since a child, i have had a deep hatred for the world and other people projected through anger isuues and depression. this is because my dad comitted suicide and i felt rejected. it's been taking me years and years to gel into communities and each day my circle grows and so does my lost love for people. fans of theo von are so raw and real and just reading comments helps me with everything, since you never know what you will read. i'm glad theo's here. he doesn't just help me, but helps millions and those millions use the same help for themselves and others. elite community of people.
Theo, you were the guy I wanted to skip class and smoke with behind the school. Now you're the guy I want to be sober with. Thank you for all your realism and vulnerability. MUCH Love from a Canadian chick♥️✌🏼😘
How do you know clown? He could be entertaining the clowns who believe, he looks like a washed up Billy Joe dirt who gives advice to the same people about the same shit lol 😂😂😂😂😂
Man Tony hit me hard here. I'm trying to get myself clean from a six year relationship with a woman who had a narcissistic personality disorder... I didn't realise at the time how she'd got me addicted to her, or rather I'd allowed myself to become addicted to her and neglected almost everything else in my life to get my fix from her. I'll get through it, I'm learning to replace it with healthy things... but after six months of hindsight and working hard to keep her away from me, I can see I shouldn't be angry at her and the way she handled things (which was hysterical to say the least). She's mentally ill and has a much bigger challenge ahead than I do. I just hope she gets better some day, but I'm done with being responsible for that. Figuring that out helped A LOT and reminds me that even if we were bad for each other, there was love there.
I was in a similar sounding relationship for 8 years. It get easier after a while, but with such a huge portion of your life spent with that one person they will always kinda "be there" and subconsciously impact decisions. I hope you're dating again and putting yourself out there! I made the mistake of shutting down, and its been really hard taking those risks again.
Look into talk therapy. From someone that has been in multiple abusive relationships, it helps to have another non-biased individual provide reassurance and inspiration to keep you on track to becoming the person you want to be 🌟 Narcissism is dangerous trap, good luck on the journey
Very proud of all these people going sober, keep it up dudes, if you relapse don't beat yourself up over it, you had the balls to make the decision of stopping hurting yourselves and that's already a very HUGE step, but do keep your focus on your goal, this suffering will be gone when you least expect it. Love yall.
Damn that last bit about the opening is so true. Often times I get sick of my life, do all the work to improve, then when its time to finally make a breakthrough I resort back to my old self. Its a constant cycle
Theo making a podcast was a fantastic idea. Most shows are for entertainment with "characters" even if its real action. Talk radio for example, no they arent fake people but they are "personalities"; theo seems to be just the real deal.
The desire to change has to be in the heart and mind. The mind can want all it wants but until the heart fills up with desire to change , it's an inner battle. Not demons, just a disagreement between the heart and mind.
I’m 22 and been in the cycle of addiction for 10 years and the last 2-3 on alcohol and hard drugs. Today is my 2nd full dry day and the withdrawals and and psychological effects are hitting different. Von always is such a big help
Theo asks great questions and Tony just hits the nail on the head every time. I’ve had multiple breakthroughs, realizations and aha moments listening to their conversation.
Dude, Tony freaking NAILED IT... I've been able to overcome several addictions over the years and what he's saying was exactly my experience, every time , even not hitting the final step at times and having to repeat. Such a cool interview!
Brooks shoes ? 😂 I haven’t heard about those shoes in years Theo is a master interviewer. He gets the most authenticity out of his guests because he’s just makes himself vulnerable
Had to come back to this. It was this conversation that actually pushed me to put down cigarettes and going on 3 months now of clean from it. Anyone that needs to hear it, my energy came back and even pushed me to better my life in all aspects. Quit marijuana and now I can actually focus on the things I couldn't do being on them. For others it helped them for me it created a lot of issues including anxiety. Thank the lord for this interaction as I needed it more than ever.
Addiction is like sitting in a house that is on fire & choosing to stay because you’ve never been outside before. The unknown more intimidating than the familiar horror. Taking that first step is hard but not impossible
I admitted with vulnerability to God that I could not deal with getting rid of my addiction alone. I had understood that because He is the Ever-living, the Maker of the Universe and all that is within, the Master of the Unknown, the Hidden and the Evident, the Master of outputs, and the One who grants Success, then I simply left it to Him. We should just worry about "the WHY" and "the WHAT" parts, God will be very pleased to take care of "the WHEN", "WHERE" and "the HOW" bits. This framework has always worked for me .❤❤
"To feel that you're not good enough for someone who's love you crave makes a person crazy inside. So if you feel like you're not enough, then you feel like you won't be loved, to be worthless and unloved is like psychological death so people drug themselves, eat, they do anything not to feel that." Never in my life have I heard someone describe rejection so succinctly! And yeah I've been drugging myself for 11yrs now but really all I've ever wanted is to feel loved😔
Try psyclocbin. You can find therapists how will walk you through a trip. It honestly teaches you that the meaning of life is love. It can not really be put into words well. Love is so powerful.
I had quit smoking for about 7 years, so the reaching habit was gone, so I thought. One day I was sitting on the coach doing a project at the coffee table. I was at a pause, and I did it. I reach for something that hadn't been there for 7 years! I didn't feel like I wanted one but the fact that my body responded by reaching for a smoke. Crazy right?! It feels good to know that I've quit for a long time, I don't even remember that need. Great Clip!
I had cigarette rituals. First thing a.m. with coffee. After meals for sure. and before brushing my teeth. After awhile. I stopped the morning coffee routine and had coffee and a good breakfast knowing that my body was going to crave something, I started eating better to avoid weight gain. It worked. Good habits are introduced not shoved into your life for longer stability. I'm pretty sure I just became more active and I didn't want to smell like a cigarette either. It all became part of the new normal. It was so worth allowing for the slow release. It gave me an appreciation for the undoing of a habit. It did require desire and discipline. @@Unidentifying
Oh my god the talk about satiation, dissatisfaction, and finally hitting the threshold is right on the money. That is exactly what happened in my most recent relationship. I had reached that point at multiple times during the relationship and could never go through with ending it. Finally i had a moment of lucidity and realized i was miserable and had been. i saw it for what it was. Not what it had been in the past or what it could be again. I jumped. Ended it right then. There was no hate in my heart. I loved the person and still do a month later. I didnt blame them or have any hate in my heart for my ex. We both contributed, we were both imperfect, and we both made our fair share of mistakes. It wasnt easy and right after i questioned myself about whether i made the right decision. Since then i've had no regrets whatsoever. This next chapter is all me. Im back in the gym working on myself and i feel good about being my one and only priority. I neglected my own wants and needs for far too long. If anyone is going through similar, you got this.
I'm going through it but have an intense urge to get back with them but I dont wanna lead them on in my confused state and make it worse but we still do care about eachother
I feel that most (all?) bad habits boil down to comfort. We all benefit in some way, even from things that have an adverse affect on us or even potentially harm us. Change is always possible, never forget that and don't believe anything less.
I didn't know I needed to see this.. thanks Theo ❤ and Tony, the way you intelligently articulate your words to be equally informative as they are empathetic towards whoever you're speaking with and LISTENING to is amazing, no steam rolling over the top of them when they're talking and encouraging them to keep going with their thoughts they were cutting off short, its such an experience and an absolute joy to listen to the pair of you explore this topic!
I like to drink wine because it's a (nearly) nightly ritual, but also each bottle is different. I feel I contribute to the local economy (lol) and swear I can taske the rain and the sun, and the soil and the toil to make it. I feel connected. As for growth, I feel there are still things to explore with my wine. Plus, it helps my writing.
one of the most important thing for me, was being self compassionate. Every morning i wake up chew gum, then stand in front of the mirror and give my self 5 minutes of vanity statements, no matter how bizarre or insignificant or mention my family, gratitude, i will find myself smiling or laughing at myself. sometimes it can turn into 10 min
Been on Paxil for a little over a year due to prolonged grief, CPTSD, etc. and while I like not having any feelings, most of the time, life is not quite the same. Maybe I need to feel those feels. There is a reason why I couldn’t ever get over it and for right now, I’m simply pausing that process and killing the feelings…. I need therapy.
I was always told by everyone as a kid that I was really smart and easily gonna get a high paying job - anything I wanted!. Just endless praise. In college i realized I was lied to. School until that point was just easy and I was bored and didn't have to try. I had never failed at anything. Then I started to struggle because I never learned to properly study. I started drinking and smoking a ton, because that's why you go to college anyway. It took me a long time that part of why kept drinking and smoking after graduating is to say "well, I was drunk/hungover and yeah, that's why I couldn't do such-and-such". I didn't truly consciously realize that until well after the fact. I couldn't blame my lack of skill or preparation, but I could blame any poor results on intoxication. Definitely used it as a scapecoat or coping mechanism for not being smart enough to accomplish something. Anyway, I think that was ~25% of the reason for why I have spent such little time sober.
For me the smoking helped me get away from people and spaces that give me anxiety because so many people hate it these days. It gives me a chance to get a break from social situations or the people in my life and it also gives me something else so it helps with boredom
The funny thing about addiction is, some people really have more of that addictive gene then others. People like that either spiral out of control, or they learn themselves and what they need to function properly. It's not boredom alone that makes people go back, it's romanticizing the past. With addictions that are negative, always remember the bad times, hopefully that keeps you where you want to be.
I never thought subliminals could make such a huge difference in overcoming addiction, but Borlest proved me wrong. After a couple of weeks, I felt a massive shift in my mindset. If you’re stuck in a cycle, this could be the solution. You’ve got nothing to lose.
I quit smoking by replacing it with hard liquor, and boy was that a mistake. For me personally, it’s 100x more addictive than smoking could ever be. Smoking doesn’t even make you feel good, it’s just that you get a craving when you don’t do it. When you’re withdrawing from booze, it’s like all the warmth in your body is gone and you’d do anything to get it back.
Going on 4 months sober. Next step is being able to say X months no internet. I have hobbies and started a library of useful/entertaining books. Pretending I'm using the internet constructively has gone too far for too long
Here is a summary of the video in 5 points: 1. People do things they know are bad because they meet certain needs. There are 6 human needs: certainty/comfort, variety, significance, connection/love, growth, and contribution. 2. Smoking can meet many of these needs: comfort, variety, significance, and connection. 3. People who are addicted to something are meeting multiple needs with that addiction. 4. The best way to quit a bad habit is to replace it with something good that meets the same needs. 5. Anthony Robbins says the chemistry of transformation is 5 things: satiation, dissatisfaction, threshold, insight, and jumping through the opening: - Satiation is when you get bored of something, even if it’s good. - Dissatisfaction is when you start to realize that something bad is happening to you. - Threshold is when things get so bad you can’t take it anymore. - Insight is when you realize that you are the source of your problems. - Jumping through the opening is when you take action to change your life.
Once I looked more inward in my active drinking and realized all my problems stemmed from myself and alcohol, that was the point of no return. It didn’t make sense for me to keep drinking.
I turned on to Tony back in the early 2000s. These videos are as close as the average guy can get too not paying for the high priced help so many people need in life. Personally, I learn things at a fine sip, taking in what a person says? compared to what a persons true intentions are? in short, I have a positive outlook with a negative expectation, and a realistic point of view. Works wonders
Behaviour change: Satiation - same thing over and over again Dissatisfaction - i don't like how this feels The highest threshold of dissatisfaction -breaking free The insight - maybe it's me The opening - taking action
Like I stoped smoking a year ago but I’ve started smoking almost for a week or soo and when I smoke I don’t like it I beat on my self and ask why why did I relapse I haven’t had a cigarette all day
I had a similar issue, coke and booze. Fueled around working in the kitchen. It gave me an edge I thought and also an excuse if I didn’t feel how I wanted it didn’t show up how I wanted. The biggest misconception about addiction from an outside perspective is IT DOES work, you can improve better, feel better, work better. The only thing is it does spiral and you run out and you end up free falling before you know it.
What about someone like me who’s almost 19 years old. I’ve been smoking weed for 4 years now. Not consistently but regularly a couple times a week. I do not see a problem with it, it makes me feel emotion and empathy which is the reason I’ve used it. Helps me question my life. It doesn’t make me lazy like others claim, it doesn’t affect my personal life(Ik this bc most don’t know I’m a stoner except for close friends and relatives). Not to mention it helps me open up. I never even smiled prior to smoking weed because my teeth were pretty fucked up and I hated people to see how crooked they were. I grew up to be anti social but I loved associating with people, even tho not a single soul could testify to that.
Once it becomes a problem you will know. And it will eat at you. Thats when you change. For now you are young have fun. Weed was awesome when I was your age. It didnt become a bad habit for me till later in life when I used it to put things off.
I think I was able to hit that opening. I don’t have this desire to drink anymore. 64 days sober and I was tired of my own crap. I’m enjoying life way more now that I’m not miserable in my addiction.
I agree with everything they said.. But I think the #1 thing people change a bad habit is when they get a health scare. My uncle was a heavy drinker, he changed coz he got sick. My dad was a heavy smoker he stopped coz he had chest pains. Once you hit rock bottom in your health, that's when people start eating healthy, doing exercise etc.
People come to Theo because he's funny. They stay because he's real and people can relate to him.
True
His episodes can go from the goofiest nonsense to the realest emotions and he fully embraces both sides
@todds9121 well said!
I like to think same goes with guests!
Facts
I’m sitting here with just over 5 days sober. I can’t sleep because of insomnia. This really hit me where it needed to. This is the longest I’ve been sober in over ten years. Here’s to day 6 tomorrow.
You got this my g 🤞🏾
Hope this helps, I used to hear and eventually it sunk it; “One day at a time” from peers I got sober around. You got this 👍
The not sleeping thing corrects fairly quickly , and it's one of the worst parts. So just lock that door and throw the key away. The worst part is when you start to feel good again and wonder why you quit in the first place. Then you fall back into it and realize it ,and have to start over. That's where I am at right now
@@TRIP2NITE thanks brother
@@skywalkerjones I agree. As corny as it sounds. Did it again today. Onto day 7 tomorrow.
“It’s not about stopping what you’re doing. It’s about starting something else that’s more fulfilling.”
Except gambling. Everyone should gamble, it can change your life! and its so easy to win
@@SPACEDOUT1950/50 win or lose. So if you lose, bet more. Easy.
Opinionated
Thank you for those words, you’re doing good things in this world
10 months no alcohol 16 days no weed and I’m going to keep going. I need my natural dopamine back, we all do.
23 days no weed, my longest break in 3 years. We doin this thing
Keep going friend, I'm four months free from alcohol and nicotine and one week without weed after being addicted to all three for most of my twenties. I can feel my personality coming back finally.
No such thing as natural unless you live a natural life which you do not, why ur typing on a fake device? Talking natural 😂
it gets better both are waste of time and terrible for your body and mind gl bro you got it
@@ericg_2025i’m on 3 days clean after 3 years and i’m feeling optimistic already
Six needs:
- comfort/certainty
- variety
- significance (i.e. sense of purpose)
- connection & love
- personal growth
- contribute beyond ourselves
Importance of replacing bad habit with a healthier one
Stages before people transform their bad habits:
- satiation (repetition makes something not as satisfying)
- dissatisfaction (previous bad habit doesn't even feel good anymore)
- threshold (you're convinced it will continue not feeling good from now on)
- insight (the "truth", you realize you can make some lasting change)
- stepping through "the opening" (others can push you through, but you choosing to enter it yourself gives a better chance of long-lasting change)
Thanks for the notes!
Comfort/Certainty
Variety
Sense of purpose
Connection and love
Personal growth
Contribute beyond ourselves
✌🏾✌🏾✌🏾
That's a good list. My favorite one is we're Here to create, to connect and to serve others. You do all three of those and your life can only go right.
Thanks
It's easy to keep a bad habit bc the reward is immediate and the consequences aren't. With good habits, the rewards aren't immediate.
yes very logical.
damn that is sooo true ...thank you....this will help me in my journey, and thats priceless
I guess that's why they say to learn to enjoy the process rather than the end result "reward". Most of life is the process, isn't it?
Nature gives good rewards constantly, the sun, moon, stars, tree's they're their every single day and nobody is exited about it when it all gives dopamine and drug effects, just admit you were brainwashed then and you are now, why you watch this clown
This
The fact that nobody talks about subliminal affirmations for overcoming addiction on Borlest speaks volumes about how people are stuck in a trance
As a guy who stopped smoking 3,5 years ago, the hardest and worst thing about stopping is the realization that cigarettes crawled themselves into so many nooks and crannies of your life. With coffee, after a meal, with a friend, smoking break, with a beer, when drinking, when sad, when angry, when happy etc. You just realize how much of your life is dictated by a tobacco stick. Not to mention the money you always find for cigarettes, but always don't have for healthy options in your life.
You have to distance yourself from the habit for an amount of time to realize just how much damage it does to you, because when you're in that "toxic relationship" with it, you can't comprehend it and that "illusion that you have it under control" is preventing you to accept that you have a problem and stop.
Great guest, Theo.
Much like alcohol
I came to this realization with 🍃 lately, that it's always around. I've smoked every day since I started years ago, and found myself wondering why I felt the need to zone out so often. I always said I never wanted to be on medication because I didn't want to alter my mood yet I've been doing so every day. I stopped drinking and going to events that pressure me to do so but tobacco and 🍃 have been something I have yet to kick
@@lolokaymeg as with any habit, it's a matter of willingness to stop and embrace all the hardships of life without numbing the pain. I completely understand why someone would want to just relax and forget about all the problems, I still do it with alcohol, however I really believe that true profound happiness can be achieved only with a sober mind.
Good luck to you and everyone struggling
I will never understand how can someone develop such a disgusting habit such as smoking. To me it's inconceivable that someone would voluntarily smoke. You could pay me a thousand dollars to smoke a single time and I'd gladly refuse it.
@@logomoko78 a lot of it has to do with education, social status and where you live. As much as I agree with your statement now, a lot of people smoke for different reasons. It isn't black and white, in my country, smoking is still acceptable in a lot of situations and a lot of people still smoke.
It is a disgusting habit indeed.
Tony Robbins is the only motivational speaker with anything real to say i really like him
This is so true...Im a 22 year addict, but now 3 years sober on March 12....it's hard to break the routine , but can be done👌🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
I quit drugs a year and a half before I quit drinking. I will have four years on April 6th. I’m such a habit type of a person. I think the first two weeks are the hardest. I was using meth, heroin, and alcohol. Blessings to you on your journey! ❤❤❤
3 years and 4 years?! Y'all are actually superheroes, never forget it ❤❤
@@Onelightoftheworld Currently on day 10 after binge drinking ruined me. Thanks for the inspiration.
Ye well done people I love the ket and benzos and alcohol and weed
@@TheDylls 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Theo, you saved my life today. You ask the questions I wish others would ask to the high level coaches. Thank you my friend
stay strong brother, i believe in you. There is a world of wonders out there for you to enjoy
Tony is legit, they had a good back and forth in depth conversation.
O yeah words mean truth lol said no one ever
“Do you have variety when you run?”
“Yeah sometimes I’ll go around the track this way & sometimes I’ll go around the track this way”
Theo is so in touch with himself that he helps me analyze my bad habits and behavior that I commit without thinking deeply about. It’s like a therapy session listening to him open up
Yeah he loves it sheep popularity gain
Thank god I quit smoking 5 months ago and I’m so proud of myself for making this decision
Congratulations!!! 10 1/2 years for me. Best decision I’ve ever made.
Just like how I got addicted to smoking weed everyday, I got addicted to exercising! You have to really try and reprogram your mind. Once you feel good from working out you’re gonna wanna feel it again, just like chasing a weed high but now instead your chasing the good feelings exercising gives you.
I got into exercising and it filled that weed void. Now when I'm tired at the end of the day its kinda like the feeling of being stoned. Realized I dont need it.
Running really does change peoples lives. It allows people to reach a state of mind and be deep in their thoughts. It’s like therapy.
This made me realize I was wrong about Tony Robbin’s, and I understand why people follow him now. Wise man.
Takes a good man to realize he was wrong admit it and then see from a different perspective. Good on you we need more of that mindset in the world.
I was watching this like, “why do people hate Tony Robbins again?”
@@TreySarver I felt guilty myself. Tony kept it real.
i love theo vons people. ever since a child, i have had a deep hatred for the world and other people projected through anger isuues and depression. this is because my dad comitted suicide and i felt rejected. it's been taking me years and years to gel into communities and each day my circle grows and so does my lost love for people. fans of theo von are so raw and real and just reading comments helps me with everything, since you never know what you will read. i'm glad theo's here. he doesn't just help me, but helps millions and those millions use the same help for themselves and others. elite community of people.
Theo is one of the most honest people online.
Theo, you were the guy I wanted to skip class and smoke with behind the school. Now you're the guy I want to be sober with. Thank you for all your realism and vulnerability. MUCH Love from a Canadian chick♥️✌🏼😘
@@Shann-ht1ez I agree, I love Theo and he’s helped me a lot as well. Love him and he’s a great down to earth and relatable guy-Do you have insta?
How do you know clown? He could be entertaining the clowns who believe, he looks like a washed up Billy Joe dirt who gives advice to the same people about the same shit lol 😂😂😂😂😂
100% 🙏 we need more people like him in this world.
Man Tony hit me hard here.
I'm trying to get myself clean from a six year relationship with a woman who had a narcissistic personality disorder... I didn't realise at the time how she'd got me addicted to her, or rather I'd allowed myself to become addicted to her and neglected almost everything else in my life to get my fix from her.
I'll get through it, I'm learning to replace it with healthy things... but after six months of hindsight and working hard to keep her away from me, I can see I shouldn't be angry at her and the way she handled things (which was hysterical to say the least). She's mentally ill and has a much bigger challenge ahead than I do. I just hope she gets better some day, but I'm done with being responsible for that. Figuring that out helped A LOT and reminds me that even if we were bad for each other, there was love there.
I was in a similar sounding relationship for 8 years. It get easier after a while, but with such a huge portion of your life spent with that one person they will always kinda "be there" and subconsciously impact decisions. I hope you're dating again and putting yourself out there! I made the mistake of shutting down, and its been really hard taking those risks again.
Look into talk therapy. From someone that has been in multiple abusive relationships, it helps to have another non-biased individual provide reassurance and inspiration to keep you on track to becoming the person you want to be 🌟
Narcissism is dangerous trap, good luck on the journey
Sure she did, it's always one blaming the other, bet if we found her she would say u were a weak man.
Reading people’s stories on Quora cured me from a horrible future
Very proud of all these people going sober, keep it up dudes, if you relapse don't beat yourself up over it, you had the balls to make the decision of stopping hurting yourselves and that's already a very HUGE step, but do keep your focus on your goal, this suffering will be gone when you least expect it. Love yall.
This is definitely one of the best conversations I've seen with Tony. I hope theo knows how much of a positive impact this video will have on others
Damn that last bit about the opening is so true. Often times I get sick of my life, do all the work to improve, then when its time to finally make a breakthrough I resort back to my old self. Its a constant cycle
Theo making a podcast was a fantastic idea. Most shows are for entertainment with "characters" even if its real action. Talk radio for example, no they arent fake people but they are "personalities"; theo seems to be just the real deal.
And he has such amazing guests!
I could watch/listen to these two talk for hours. Such powerful and authentic discussion here, thank you for this.
Watching Theo be open about the same issues I have is inspiring.
Whoever you are you are u got this follow the gifts Tony shared. You're going to be just fine 😊
The desire to change has to be in the heart and mind. The mind can want all it wants but until the heart fills up with desire to change , it's an inner battle. Not demons, just a disagreement between the heart and mind.
I’m 22 and been in the cycle of addiction for 10 years and the last 2-3 on alcohol and hard drugs.
Today is my 2nd full dry day and the withdrawals and and psychological effects are hitting different. Von always is such a big help
bro, try to do psycadelics and meditate, put meditate in your schedeul for 30mins a day, be alone with your ego while on psycadelics! Trust me !
approach with respect, and dont be ingorant to the stuff you will see! LSD or Mushrooms!
Much respect! Keep pushing
@@lichley26Dont encourage lsd brother bahaha mushrooms are okay but i know people who are nearly brain dead from lsd
Theo asks great questions and Tony just hits the nail on the head every time. I’ve had multiple breakthroughs, realizations and aha moments listening to their conversation.
Dude, Tony freaking NAILED IT... I've been able to overcome several addictions over the years and what he's saying was exactly my experience, every time , even not hitting the final step at times and having to repeat. Such a cool interview!
Brooks shoes ? 😂
I haven’t heard about those shoes in years
Theo is a master interviewer. He gets the most authenticity out of his guests because he’s just makes himself vulnerable
Had to come back to this. It was this conversation that actually pushed me to put down cigarettes and going on 3 months now of clean from it. Anyone that needs to hear it, my energy came back and even pushed me to better my life in all aspects. Quit marijuana and now I can actually focus on the things I couldn't do being on them. For others it helped them for me it created a lot of issues including anxiety. Thank the lord for this interaction as I needed it more than ever.
This video should be available on DVD and winning dozens of awards
I don't understand how Theo can think he is ugly. He is good looking, maybe a haircut would do him good but he is definitely not ugly
Addiction is like sitting in a house that is on fire & choosing to stay because you’ve never been outside before.
The unknown more intimidating than the familiar horror.
Taking that first step is hard but not impossible
Nah this country has no future people all over are panicking
I admitted with vulnerability to God that I could not deal with getting rid of my addiction alone. I had understood that because He is the Ever-living, the Maker of the Universe and all that is within, the Master of the Unknown, the Hidden and the Evident, the Master of outputs, and the One who grants Success, then I simply left it to Him. We should just worry about "the WHY" and "the WHAT" parts, God will be very pleased to take care of "the WHEN", "WHERE" and "the HOW" bits. This framework has always worked for me .❤❤
"To feel that you're not good enough for someone who's love you crave makes a person crazy inside.
So if you feel like you're not enough,
then you feel like you won't be loved,
to be worthless and unloved is like psychological death so people drug themselves, eat, they do anything not to feel that."
Never in my life have I heard someone describe rejection so succinctly!
And yeah I've been drugging myself for 11yrs now but really all I've ever wanted is to feel loved😔
This resonates with me so much, all I've been doing is torturing myself.
Try psyclocbin. You can find therapists how will walk you through a trip. It honestly teaches you that the meaning of life is love. It can not really be put into words well. Love is so powerful.
@@127twilson
11 yrs.
Yes, love is powerful.
Its easy to teeter between being proud of how far you e come and feeling self pity for what you've gone through to get there.
I had quit smoking for about 7 years, so the reaching habit was gone, so I thought. One day I was sitting on the coach doing a project at the coffee table. I was at a pause, and I did it. I reach for something that hadn't been there for 7 years! I didn't feel like I wanted one but the fact that my body responded by reaching for a smoke. Crazy right?! It feels good to know that I've quit for a long time, I don't even remember that need. Great Clip!
how did you quit ?
I had cigarette rituals. First thing a.m. with coffee. After meals for sure. and before brushing my teeth. After awhile. I stopped the morning coffee routine and had coffee and a good breakfast knowing that my body was going to crave something, I started eating better to avoid weight gain. It worked. Good habits are introduced not shoved into your life for longer stability. I'm pretty sure I just became more active and I didn't want to smell like a cigarette either. It all became part of the new normal. It was so worth allowing for the slow release. It gave me an appreciation for the undoing of a habit. It did require desire and discipline. @@Unidentifying
@@Unidentifyingjust don’t smoke bro it’s easy as that you’re damaging your body
Ive been off cigs for a year and still occasionally crave one or feel like something is missing. Crazy!
It's true. But I bet you feel better when you are being active...@@nicholaspepper6989
This was such a powerful and beautiful interaction. I really applaud him for being so vulnerable and honest.
Tony is like a good dad talking to a teen son.❤️
yes I remember when my dads head was twice the size of mine 4:07
Never knew I needed a Theo and Tony conversation 🙌
Oh my god the talk about satiation, dissatisfaction, and finally hitting the threshold is right on the money. That is exactly what happened in my most recent relationship. I had reached that point at multiple times during the relationship and could never go through with ending it. Finally i had a moment of lucidity and realized i was miserable and had been. i saw it for what it was. Not what it had been in the past or what it could be again. I jumped. Ended it right then. There was no hate in my heart. I loved the person and still do a month later. I didnt blame them or have any hate in my heart for my ex. We both contributed, we were both imperfect, and we both made our fair share of mistakes. It wasnt easy and right after i questioned myself about whether i made the right decision. Since then i've had no regrets whatsoever. This next chapter is all me. Im back in the gym working on myself and i feel good about being my one and only priority. I neglected my own wants and needs for far too long. If anyone is going through similar, you got this.
I'm going through it but have an intense urge to get back with them but I dont wanna lead them on in my confused state and make it worse but we still do care about eachother
Theo; great job with this piece of the interview with Mr. Robbins. Your story makes his points become tangible and accessible to the listener.
I feel that most (all?) bad habits boil down to comfort. We all benefit in some way, even from things that have an adverse affect on us or even potentially harm us. Change is always possible, never forget that and don't believe anything less.
I didn't know I needed to see this.. thanks Theo ❤ and Tony, the way you intelligently articulate your words to be equally informative as they are empathetic towards whoever you're speaking with and LISTENING to is amazing, no steam rolling over the top of them when they're talking and encouraging them to keep going with their thoughts they were cutting off short, its such an experience and an absolute joy to listen to the pair of you explore this topic!
36 days saber here baby!!
4 months here thanks to the vape
1:35 tony turns in to seth rogan momentarily
Amazing 😂😂😂😂
“That’s a great first step.”
The “literally yea” Theo threw out really got me.
It was surprisingly easy to stop smoking cigarettes when I really wanted to. Prior to that real urge to stop a behavior, I couldn't.
I truly believe therapist like Tony Robbins are the ones that actually really need the therapy and by them helping others it help themselves
Paid the big $$$ to work with the mouth ... and not the hands ?
Theo has a way of stringing words we didn’t expect together to describe thoughts and feelings that are relatable
I had that wake up call. Changed my life in last 3years. An illness almost killed me and I survived. I was.the problem and had to change.
Probably one of the most insightful clips I have ever watched
I like to drink wine because it's a (nearly) nightly ritual, but also each bottle is different. I feel I contribute to the local economy (lol) and swear I can taske the rain and the sun, and the soil and the toil to make it. I feel connected. As for growth, I feel there are still things to explore with my wine. Plus, it helps my writing.
one of the most important thing for me, was being self compassionate. Every morning i wake up chew gum, then stand in front of the mirror and give my self 5 minutes of vanity statements, no matter how bizarre or insignificant or mention my family, gratitude, i will find myself smiling or laughing at myself. sometimes it can turn into 10 min
Mental health is something all men struggle with. Theo reminds us we're all human and we all have personal demons.
Theo gettin real as usual
And this became a therapy session i did not know i needed but im glad i was given
I was two months sober and relapsed really bad last night…. I’m not giving up though I’m going to keep going and not drink
My legs saved me all my life. It took me places I would have never been and opportunities I would have never got
Tony Robbins is the best role model in America, maybe in the whole world 🌍 my EQ improves every time I hear or read him
Been on Paxil for a little over a year due to prolonged grief, CPTSD, etc. and while I like not having any feelings, most of the time, life is not quite the same. Maybe I need to feel those feels. There is a reason why I couldn’t ever get over it and for right now, I’m simply pausing that process and killing the feelings…. I need therapy.
Can’t push it aside forever dawg. Someday the coping mechanisms will be gone and you’ll have to suffer. Better to make it sooner and in your own terms
I was always told by everyone as a kid that I was really smart and easily gonna get a high paying job - anything I wanted!. Just endless praise. In college i realized I was lied to. School until that point was just easy and I was bored and didn't have to try. I had never failed at anything. Then I started to struggle because I never learned to properly study. I started drinking and smoking a ton, because that's why you go to college anyway. It took me a long time that part of why kept drinking and smoking after graduating is to say "well, I was drunk/hungover and yeah, that's why I couldn't do such-and-such". I didn't truly consciously realize that until well after the fact. I couldn't blame my lack of skill or preparation, but I could blame any poor results on intoxication. Definitely used it as a scapecoat or coping mechanism for not being smart enough to accomplish something. Anyway, I think that was ~25% of the reason for why I have spent such little time sober.
I relate to this so much
You think smart is success and schooling you were a fool from the beginning
I swear Theo von makes up for my day 💯🙌🏽😂😂 god bless you brother
great conversation, thanks for this!
I don’t know much about this Tony Robbins fella, but man he’s makin me feel some things.
"Hey, you know I realized if I take perfect care of myself, one day, I'll get very sick and die" Rodney Dangerfied ❤
For me the smoking helped me get away from people and spaces that give me anxiety because so many people hate it these days. It gives me a chance to get a break from social situations or the people in my life and it also gives me something else so it helps with boredom
Tony is such an intelligent guy, I love hearing him speak
The funny thing about addiction is, some people really have more of that addictive gene then others. People like that either spiral out of control, or they learn themselves and what they need to function properly. It's not boredom alone that makes people go back, it's romanticizing the past. With addictions that are negative, always remember the bad times, hopefully that keeps you where you want to be.
I never thought subliminals could make such a huge difference in overcoming addiction, but Borlest proved me wrong. After a couple of weeks, I felt a massive shift in my mindset. If you’re stuck in a cycle, this could be the solution. You’ve got nothing to lose.
I quit smoking by replacing it with hard liquor, and boy was that a mistake. For me personally, it’s 100x more addictive than smoking could ever be. Smoking doesn’t even make you feel good, it’s just that you get a craving when you don’t do it. When you’re withdrawing from booze, it’s like all the warmth in your body is gone and you’d do anything to get it back.
These guys are the best.
Going on 4 months sober. Next step is being able to say X months no internet. I have hobbies and started a library of useful/entertaining books. Pretending I'm using the internet constructively has gone too far for too long
Truth! Important things to accept and stick with if we want to be our best.
Thanks for sharing these videos! both of you !
Here is a summary of the video in 5 points:
1. People do things they know are bad because they meet certain needs. There are 6 human needs: certainty/comfort, variety, significance, connection/love, growth, and contribution.
2. Smoking can meet many of these needs: comfort, variety, significance, and connection.
3. People who are addicted to something are meeting multiple needs with that addiction.
4. The best way to quit a bad habit is to replace it with something good that meets the same needs.
5. Anthony Robbins says the chemistry of transformation is 5 things: satiation, dissatisfaction, threshold, insight, and jumping through the opening:
- Satiation is when you get bored of something, even if it’s good.
- Dissatisfaction is when you start to realize that something bad is happening to you.
- Threshold is when things get so bad you can’t take it anymore.
- Insight is when you realize that you are the source of your problems.
- Jumping through the opening is when you take action to change your life.
Wow, very good explanation given with joy and fun.
Thanks Theo and Tony, I got a lot of insight from this.
Once I looked more inward in my active drinking and realized all my problems stemmed from myself and alcohol, that was the point of no return. It didn’t make sense for me to keep drinking.
I turned on to Tony back in the early 2000s. These videos are as close as the average guy can get too not paying for the high priced help so many people need in life. Personally, I learn things at a fine sip, taking in what a person says? compared to what a persons true intentions are? in short, I have a positive outlook with a negative expectation, and a realistic point of view. Works wonders
Ok….deep breath…..Tony Robbins is a force to be reckoned with.
This is so helpful thank you for posting this.
Loved this. Sometimes you come across a video just when you need to hear it 🙌🏼
Tony Robbins is the goat.
Theo started on the real world now this man a legend
Behaviour change:
Satiation - same thing over and over again
Dissatisfaction - i don't like how this feels
The highest threshold of dissatisfaction -breaking free
The insight - maybe it's me
The opening - taking action
Like I stoped smoking a year ago but I’ve started smoking almost for a week or soo and when I smoke I don’t like it I beat on my self and ask why why did I relapse I haven’t had a cigarette all day
The threshold part is deep for sure.
🎼Drop kick me Tony, through the goalposts of life🎶
I had a similar issue, coke and booze. Fueled around working in the kitchen. It gave me an edge I thought and also an excuse if I didn’t feel how I wanted it didn’t show up how I wanted. The biggest misconception about addiction from an outside perspective is IT DOES work, you can improve better, feel better, work better. The only thing is it does spiral and you run out and you end up free falling before you know it.
What about someone like me who’s almost 19 years old. I’ve been smoking weed for 4 years now. Not consistently but regularly a couple times a week. I do not see a problem with it, it makes me feel emotion and empathy which is the reason I’ve used it. Helps me question my life. It doesn’t make me lazy like others claim, it doesn’t affect my personal life(Ik this bc most don’t know I’m a stoner except for close friends and relatives). Not to mention it helps me open up. I never even smiled prior to smoking weed because my teeth were pretty fucked up and I hated people to see how crooked they were. I grew up to be anti social but I loved associating with people, even tho not a single soul could testify to that.
Once it becomes a problem you will know. And it will eat at you. Thats when you change. For now you are young have fun. Weed was awesome when I was your age. It didnt become a bad habit for me till later in life when I used it to put things off.
This video made me wanna use even more. Thanks, Tony.
Great points made. Love you everyone x
Absolutely amazing clip, thanks to both of you
I think I was able to hit that opening. I don’t have this desire to drink anymore. 64 days sober and I was tired of my own crap. I’m enjoying life way more now that I’m not miserable in my addiction.
Thats great keep it up life is more than the sauce. -Former alchy
Learn to make yourself feel better on your own terms, it’s called facing it. That’s the moral to the point. Replace bad with good.
2 of my favorite people.
I agree with everything they said.. But I think the #1 thing people change a bad habit is when they get a health scare. My uncle was a heavy drinker, he changed coz he got sick. My dad was a heavy smoker he stopped coz he had chest pains. Once you hit rock bottom in your health, that's when people start eating healthy, doing exercise etc.
I love listening to Tony Robbins. Always makes me feel better.