Eric Nevins: When You are Angry at God

In this conversation, Tom Rundel interviews Eric Nevins on the Liminal Living podcast. They discuss Eric's journey from studying theology to working in finance, his experience of a dark night of the soul, and the importance of embracing the ongoing process of spiritual growth. They also explore the tension between the objective and subjective experiences of God. In this conversation, Eric Nevins and Tom Rundel discuss the challenges of experiencing God and expressing anger towards Him within the Christian community. They explore the lack of space for doubt and lament in worship songs, sermons, and church spaces. They also highlight the importance of knowing the stories of God's people throughout history and the need for a theology that acknowledges suffering and difficult questions. The conversation concludes with a discussion on the fluidity of faith and the importance of living out the kingdom of God in everyday life.
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[@takinabradley]

Love to see you posting again Tom. You were an intermediary pastor at my church a good while ago, and I remember how much you and your message spoke to me at that time. I've been wondering about and praying for you for some time now- but haven't had the courage to reach out. I'm sorry about that.
I loved the topic of this video. I don't often find myself in a church anymore, but I think a lot of what's been said here echos my personal relationship with God. Like you I think the majority of my prayers tend along the lines of asking for a change big or small, and I've come to accept within myself to not expect a perceptible change.
Like your story of Thérèse of Lisieux, though, I've learned to be blatantly honest with the Lord in prayer. Among other fairly frequent prayers for forgiveness and of thankfulness, and the occasional joke, I will groan and complain to him, pester him with questions, shake my head and make snide remarks, and laugh at the ridiculousness of it all (the good and the bad)- but when it's all done I find there's always a moment of solidarity for us to spend together. He knows our hearts, and my messages are nothing new to him, but I truly believe he values the keeping of an active line of communication between us. I think you may have been getting at a similar thing when you were talking about the your subjective experience of God.
The verse "...Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel; for you have struggled with God and with men, and have prevailed." frequently comes to my mind.
Just by regularly talking to the lord and having faith, he helps guide my frame of mind as I take my next steps. I find he speaks to me through those very moments, and quiets my mind.
I hope you're doing well, and if you still struggle even in personal prayers, I hope you too may be able to open and maintain an active line of communication with the Lord.

[@liminalliving]

I’m having trouble remembering a face to go with this TH-cam handle name. But thank you for the kind comments. Much of my prayers as of late have not had words, much like an attention in silence in the direction of the divine. That has been part of the wrestling, refusing to let go until I get a new name for this season.
I’ve been posting audio content on my podcast for about a year and a half now. Just started with the video a few months ago. I’m glad you found it! And thank you again for the kind words.