I was Disappointed in God and Lost My Faith with Jason Gray
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 ก.ย. 2024
- In this video, Jason Gray shares his story of how he lost faith in God. He talks about what led him to the place where he felt abandoned by God and why it was difficult for him to regain faith after that point.
If you're wrestling with your faith there is help and hope at joyfmonline.or....
I feel abandoned by GOD.🙁
Me too
Me too
You are not abandoned by God my friends❤. Remember what God said in Hebrews 13:5?
Don't love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you. God keeps His promises
You’re not the only one
people don't realise how painful this experience is.
It's the worst. Ready for it to be over.
For real. Currently going through it.
shut up drama queen
Agreed.
Yeah
I am more miserable waiting for God to show up then I was before I was saved and I wonder what’s the point of having faith
I feel exactly the same way.
My life was easy and I had a positive view on life.
Thank you for sharing I know it's not only me.
🧡👍
Lol before I was saved everything was just so much easier, positive, almost like it was handed to me on a platter.
After I was saved the exact opposite became true.
God will restore you, God will give back what the enemy has taken from you , God will give you the joy you disire and deserve! I will pray for you, but i know for a fact that he will deliver you! there is nothing you can do or say to change the gifts that God has written for your life.
Just think of what He did for us and how traumatic it was for Him. He made it.
We will too although not fun sometimes. There are health problems with a few of my kids that just make me want to go away, but I think of them and how strong they are and I’m so weak and they give me strength ( although Yah does). I just pray for them to come to know the truth first and foremost. He says endure till the end and THEN you will be saved and already warned us that we will have tribulation. I don’t look on the “ easier times” before , because I now know where I was headed , although the world looked at me as good. We need to look forward and not look back at the easier.🤷♀️
@@serdlc64 God is so good. He always provides. I think a lot of us are struggling with the fact it's ALL IN HIS TIME, not ours.
But God knows the perfect time for everything. We who are struggling just need to be patient, a fruit of the Holy Spirit in Christ.
I've believed in God all of the days of my life but I've lost my faith to a great degree. I'm tired of the constant pain, loss and suffering. I don't even have a real prayer life anymore. I don't want to talk to God because it doesn't matter because He is going to let things happen to good people. Everyday I wonder when I open my eyes what new tragedy awaits me.
I still believe but I feel so faithless and indifferent to God. Life is unbearable for me at times.
Psalm 13
Psalm 28
Psalm 37
Psalm 107
Matthew 5:3-16
@shespeaks2441, if I didn't see your name attached to this post, I would have thought that I wrote this. Your words are my exact feelings and words. I wait to see what horrible things will happen next. I watch every evil person who crossed me living their best lives. Knowing that they did me dirty. I looked to God... like wait. I know I'm not perfect, but I haven't done half the things that some have done to me to, but see those people coming up and I am dying inside every single day. If I didn't have my children...I would probably be dead now. But I love them too much to hurt them like that. 😢
@@SheickaLewis
Psalm 37
@@SheickaLewisAnd i feel like you wrote everything I am feeling right now. My life is in a complete wreck. Soon to be homeless with two kids. And the ppl who caused me all this are enjoying watching me suffer. I prayed to God so many times but I feel he's not listening to me. I truly feel like God is punishing me And I am a bad person that's why all this is happening to me. Thank you for putting my thought's in words🙌🏾
I can’t feel God any longer. I never thought I’d feel this way. God has broken my spirit.
Go with God stop lying God loves you
@@averageindoeuropean8103 That’s funny.
@@averageindoeuropean8103 LYING? Dang, some christians say very offensive things
It's very hard to see people who don't even acknowledge God live beautifully while you suffer as a born again Christian, nothing seems to be going well, career, finances, your overall well-being is a mess yet you pray,you trust and obey.😢
@@DK1MM Just checking in. How are things since this comment. I have been like you, but I am someone that does care about the pain of others. I hope things are better or are working there way towards being better for you. Keep on keeping on, I believe in YOU!
Losing my trust in God, has to be the most painful ordeal of my life.
@@matthewj2492 please don't loose hope in GOD. HE IS ALL we've got nothing else matters...
@@MeronMelese-nk1sg Made it through! Thx
Your not alone
@@matthewj2492 don't let the enemy of your soul win!!!!!! KEEP MOVING!!!
@@matthewj2492 Just checking in. How are things since this comment. I have been like you, but I am someone that does care about the pain of others. I hope things are better or are working there way towards being better for you. Keep on keeping on, I believe in YOU!
This last year within a three month period I lost my father, my wife had an affair on me and my cancer became very severe when I caught covid. It’s hard to hold faith in the darkest of times. It confusing to think about why god allows these things to happen. It’s the hardest chapter of my life as I am only 23 years old. I have to just continue to pray and live the best life I can.
Brizzo,
I’m so sorry for your losses. I’m praying for you.
Good grief.
I’m very sorry all this happened to you. I hope your circumstances change for the better.
BIG HUGS 🤗. I'm praying for you.
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
I've stopped praying. Just a week ago I lost my faith like breath blowing out a candle. Just sudden and abrupt. I convinced myself that this time would be different, that even after all the no's, God was going to bless my family with an income that was substantial to say the least. That God was just trying to teach me patience and hope. It would have helped us greatly with our child, a vehicle, food. And it didn't happen. Instead we were yet again skipped over for someone else. I cursed and cursed saying all sorts of vile things, that i wish the person who was chosen would just drop d*ad on the job. I am slowly but surely turning into a bitter person, a person who doesn't have love for their fellow man anymore. A person who doesn't even care for God anymore. It's not that I don't believe he exists, its just that i am convinced if he does exist he certainly doesn't care about any of us.
Same
I am so sorry for all your losses. I am praying for you right now that god will
Show himself to you mightily
@@theSILVERMANshow 😞
I just want to say I’m sorry for the pain and hurt. It says in the Bible it rains on the just and the unjust. You’re doin nothing wrong. This world isn’t our home. Disciples were killed for their faith. We have to be saved but not soft on things of God. I suggest you fasting and praying. I will pray for you right now. I’m a pastors wife and stuff isn’t always easy, trust me. But God is always with me even when I can’t feel him for weeks on end. I praise him regardless.
@@hannbanan715 my dad abused my mom up until her death and he is more successful and appears to now be more happy than he has ever been. He just acts like nothing happened.
I am losing my faith right now because before I got saved, I was alot happier. I was a free spirit who was generally a happy person. Once I got saved, Ive gone through so much spiritual warfare and there is just alot of restrictions on my life I feel like once I got saved. Can't listen to specific music, can't do this, can't do that. It is very hard but what really was a breaking point for me was a group of people betrayed me when I did nothing wrong and here they are, living there lives happy, while here I am miserable. It's like I feel like Christianity is all about breaking you down where you feel you lost control of your free will.
Keep fighting
I can clearly understand especially as a pastor's daughter. My whole life was consumed with church this and church that. I grew to understand the different between religion versus relationship many years later but now after all the things I've lost and the horrible so called hypocritical Christians, I don't want anything to do with it. My only option at this point is to leave Christianity and turn to Messianic Judaism as one last ditch effort or become a agnostic.
Praying for you, for the warfare to break. It’s unbelievably difficult when the warfare is so heavy; you definitely start to question everything. Christianity at its core is about a relationship with God though-the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. It’s all about relationship-if that hasn’t been explained or taught-which it often isn’t and I think takes a good while to really understand if you weren’t taught; it definitely has for me and I’m still learning-it turns to empty, dead religious rules. A loving father gives parameters to his child’s life and those are known through relationship. Maybe the child doesn’t understand when he’s 5 why he can’t drive the car; but when he’s 16 and learns the ins and outs as to how to drive and all that comes with it, he understands why his father set that boundary in place and can see it was for his best interest and safety of his life.
God has rescued us out of the control of darkness though Jesus-keep turning to Him, He is the only way out of the darkness-if the only thing you can do is just that (turn to Him). And tell Him how much you’re struggling, like Jason talked about in this interview-tell Him everything and ask Him to make Himself real and known to you where you are. I’ve prayed this many times and know that He answers this cry ♥️
Same
I know what you mean. I can't relate specifically, but I can relate generally! We have two options, really: life without God or life with Him....and I can't imagine life without God!
I never knew darkness as I’m experiencing it now. Still looking for direction, but your words shed some light to my way. Thanks bro.
I just want to say I see you, and I care about what you're going through. I don't know what else to say, but my heart sits with you tonight.
Everything happens for a reason, even if it doesn't make sense at the time.
Im gonna give you a verse that the Lord has helped me with many times. Isaiah 43:1
"But now thus saith the Lord that created thee, O Jacob, and He that formed thee O Israel, Fear not: For I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine."
Isaiah 54:4
Isaiah 41:8-9
Isaiah 54:10
That hit home right now. Things are so hard, and I feel like I'm drowning. Its so hard to keep holding onto your faith when your world is crashing down, but I always keep fighting.
Sending prayers and strength your way. God is with you. ❤
CULTS ARE FUN EH? NORMAL PEOPLE TYPE BIBLE CRITICISM ONLINE AND LEARN THE HEBREW MYTHS ARE MYTHS AND THE BIBLE IS FICTION, STUPID. HOW EDUCATED ARE YOU, ANDI?
😢I have lost my will to fight anymore and I am tired of being in this world and praying to a God who doesn't listen 😢
@@nathanieldortch6253He does listen and we're being tested. It's very hard going through trials and we don't hear. Keep praying Brother.
I am so sorry. I came here for the same reason God bless you honey. I am about to pray for you now because I cannot pray for myself.
Life was so much easier before becoming christian. Tribulations are non stop. I'm depressed all the time. I'm deeply hurt on a physical, mental and spiritual level where all three bleed into each other. I've been praying for God to deliver me from them but He never has. I'm drowning on dry land.
He won't help you. You have to help you. You can't wait to be saved.
He's trying to teach you something. Trust the process.
Just imagine your reward on the other side!
Same here… the closest I wanted to be with God the worse my life bacame. Ilness, all friends left me alone I feel am loosing everything. I dont even have any mroe goal in my life but just to die…
@@annawojtowicz1330
John 15
19: If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.
All it would take is God to just tell me... something, anything. I'm breaking down, crying on my bed begging him to just talk to me and give me some kind of comfort, and I get nothing but silence. I want to stop feeling this way whenever I talk to him, but how can I do that when the only thing I get in return is silence and signs that I think might be him talking to me but I never know for certain. I'm just so tired of the uncertainty, and all it would take is quite literally one clear, direct, unmistakable word from him in my head to do that.
I'm sorry you feel like God has been silent for you. I pray today that he gives you a reminder that he's still there. He loves you.
@911 please dont tell that person god loves them. Theres no evidence of that being true.
@JMRabil675 I know that God loves me. There are certain things that have happened in my life that have proven that to me despite the uncertainty it also brings due to it being indirect. What I don't understand and likely never will (at least in this life) is why God is silent.
God does indeed love you and you know that. I’m glad you do but let me give you a tip. The uncertainties you face about whether it’s God’s voice or not will be cleared when you focus on His written word, the Bible. You can’t tell right now because you don’t really know Him. My advice- focus on His word, get a very sound Bible believing church, spend time In prayer. Gradually you’ll see that what you’ve been looking for is right in front of you. I genuinely pray that you get to that point where you can boldly testify that you have an intimate relationship with your creator . I love you❤️
@ejirojones7356 Thanks for your comment. I don't want to make it seem like I don't have a relationship with God, I do, but it just feels....distant. Partly because I just want a more direct relationship with him where I can ask questions or advice and get actual audible answers rather than just spontaneous suggestions. Do you hear God's voice as a literal voice, or is it more along the lines of a strong mental suggestion that comes out of nowhere?
When I was 19 I was going to kill myself. I wasn't unhappy or anything, I just wanted to be "free" of the flesh. As I was contemplating how to do it, I had a visitation from an angel who told me that there was a purpose for my life and I needed to live. Six years later I met my husband and a year after that we had a beautiful baby girl. Everyone loved her. She lit up lives with her sweetness and humor and beauty. When she was 13 her father shot himself in the head and died. But we had each other and carried on. Fast forward through many years, many life experiences, and many changes. At age 35 she met a man and they fell in love. They didn't want children because they wanted to travel and maybe live in South America one day. They were together for 12 years. Two years ago they got into a horrible fight. No one knows exactly what was the cause because they were alone when it happened. However, close friends suspected that it was because of another woman. Evidently they were very drunk when they had this fight. She struck him - he was a very large man: 6 feet, 5 inches/285 pounds. She was 5 feet, 8 inches/165 pounds so he was over 100 pounds heavier than she. In his drunkenness and anger, he struck her back when she hit him. He knocked her onto the sofa and then sat on her until she vomited and her heart gave out. He called 911 but was too drunk to perform CPR. By the time the paramedics arrived she had been without oxygen for almost 30 minutes. I lived in another state and she was put on life support until I was found. Her boyfriend checked himself into a psychiatric hospital, presumably because he was afraid he would hurt himself, but actually to protect himself from the law. He stayed there for over 3 weeks. After 4 days on life support, the doctors and I decided that she didn't appear to have signs of life without the machines, so we pulled the plugs. She died within 10 minutes.
Her friends had a big celebration of life, songs, dances, food, stories. It was very nice, but they have all moved on, as they should.
So was she the reason the angel told me that I had to live? I had to say goodbye to her father on his deathbed and goodbye to our daughter on her death bed. I'm 76 now, not 19. My purpose for life is gone. Most of my friends are dead. My siblings offer to talk when I need to, but they don't really want to hear about it. I don't blame them, it's scary and it's boring and they have no words of comfort.
I've become everything I didn't want to be: a tired, depressed, old woman. I have pills to get through the day and pills to help me sleep. I can't move around much because of arthritis. I used to enjoy knitting, but I can't do much of that anymore. I try not to feel sorry for myself, but I feel sorry for all the mothers who have lost their beloved children. What was it all for anyway? To be honest, I hope I die before I have to lose anymore loved ones. I'm afraid of a DIY job.
Even without my personal sorrows, the world has become such an ugly place. Unless you have lots of money to protect you and buy good food and pay for servants, most people work meaningless jobs and live for the weekend. The government is corrupt, the school system teaches kids that they can change their genders, the world is being run by godless heathens,.even the food and water supply is contaminated. If Jesus is coming back, what is He waiting for? It's not a wonder that even good, Christian people are losing their faith.
I can so relate to Your testimony ❤️
THANK YOU!! I’ve been through this but we Christians don’t share..sharing HEALS others. We need more transparency like this, thank you for stepping out and sharing
I agree. Christian churches seem to be the greatest pretenders. We don't talk truth and we keep a fascade of verses to mask what's really happening. Verses have their place, don't get me wrong, but being honest about life has it's place so God can step in and we can get healing we need verses contining to be dead on inside. Iam at thai loint of deep disappointment in God that has jaut leadt o deeper depressikna nd despair. No christians is around to help no good counseling and being a member of chirch for years hasnt helped. I am just silent. The power if God isnt what I thought it would be, the plans of God havent been what I thought they would be, the answered prayers and direction of God hasnt been what I rhought it would be....now sit here numb. I don't even want to go to church to pretend anymore and be alone....nor make effort to believe - believe in what....? My exoectations have been way iff
It’s not just Christians who go through this. Everyone does. Jews, Muslims and etc believe in God also
I am reading through the comments. It looks like a lot of people are hurting. I used to be on fire for God and served in many church ministries, even leading a Bible study class. I used to pray daily and many times I have followed a program to read the Bible (OT and NT) in one year, so I have read it from cover-to-cover numerous times. However, I have lost my faith due to a series of terrible and sad events in my life, but I still go to church looking for that one thing that will turn my faith back on, like he said in the video. So far, I have not been successful, and I was hoping he would share which psalm did that for him. I cried when I heard the song On Fire (Sanctus Real) the first time, because that was me. Pray for me is all I ask.
Have things gotten any better?
@@rarenames2270 My head is still above the water. That is a good sign.
@@kemreaktion903 God bless you bro❤️. I struggle with loneliness . Please pray for me
Not that I don't want anyone to pray for you, but I wonder why? Why should we pray for something good for us? If God is Love and know our thoughts why does he expects prays?
If you had a good dad on earth would you speak to him? Or would you ignore him aswell
It's comforting to know I'm not the only one who's felt that way... thank you for sharing.
i guess we are not Gods favorites
@@pedinurse1 probably because God doesn't pick favorites 💜
I've heard in sermons that your faith is not supposed to be in what God does for you, but in who God is. And I say to that, but that's not how this faith journey started. My faith began when God intervened in my life in a radical way and helped me out of my immediate problems. It didn't start with solely intellectually knowing who God is!
Why would I worship a being that betrayed me. I dont care if he exists or doesn't. What he promised - he did not fulfil. Either he does not exist, or if there is a god, than human interpretations of him are all wrong.
I've been seeking God for years. Despite my seeking I feel empty. I'll continue to seek so but I'm very discouraged about it all.
Please do not give up on the Lord!!! He has a plan for your life: "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11 NKJV). He loved you before the world was even formed! "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love" (Ephesians 1:3-4). He is with you!!!!! He loves you, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3:16). What a blessing! What unspeakable mercy and love poured out on us before we were even born. I will be praying for you!
Same. Sometimes I wonder why I continue..
I been stopped and doing alright.
@@Pharaoh_The_Great Please keep seeking him. He is with you.
Worst thing is that I believe in God, but I don't think that He loves me. Like in the OT, God would sacrifice kingdoms and countries for Israelites well-being. What if I'm on the other side of God's favor. Then there's no one caring and fighting for me. I'm in misery, poverty and pain since childhood and no one cares, it doesn't matter, it has no purpose. I'm 37 now and my life never begun. I will never have a home, my own family, I'll never have a kids. I don't have or own anything. I never stood a chance.
I had alot of fallouts with God, I yelled, I screamed, a lil profanity but with great fear. But I was blinded by anger and frustration at those times. Its all about communication, having a relationship with Him, and He understands us better than anybody else ever could. Some things I cannot talk about with friends or family for fear of being judged, laughed at, mocked or labelled crazy. Nowadays I just take Everything I'm dealing with to Him. Even if it was my own doing that got me in that predicament, and yeah, I get scolded alot! 🙄😂🙌
I can so relate to this !
Father heard " some wild things " from me 😊
But throughout the years I have come to realize that God can handle it and its a relationship, as such, we go through many emotions as we learn to communicate with Him effectively
Amen...no judgement...you wouldnt believe some of the things i said in anger...And God is not juding you either. I don't care what you did or said...
Here's the thing, we're allowed to get mad at God. He can take it! He knows everything about us, and we have no secrets from him. He loves us more than anything and sometimes it's hard to believe his intentions are best but it's an everyday journey! Hang in there everyone! It's so worth it!
@@barbcramer763 it’s not okay to get mad at Him if we have faith, because we know that our lives are not our own anymore. He decides what to do with it by Himself
@@benjaminmagambo3849 there's like 10 psalms where David gets mad at God. Those books are put in the bible for a reason. Are you to now accuse David the man known for being after God's heart of being faithless because he was angry at him? We can be upset with God and till have faith in Him. We can know that He controls everything but still be upset of how is He is controlling things especially when we do not understand His reasons for allowing pain into our lives.
I pray Lord you have a purpose and a plan for all those who are feeling you’re not close to them or believe you don’t have better for them. In Jesus name renew their faith in you and send your comfort and peace🙏🏾.
God bless your soul! 🙏
I was full of life.. until i lost my dad and my young brother on the same day.. its been 4 months and my life is miserable.. i have no hope left in life anymore.. i pray that no one goes through the amount of pain I'm passing through.. i still have my faith in God but i feel like i have lost hope in life.
😭😭😭😭
I’ve unfortunately lost all faith in God…I’m tired of the constant silence from him. I’m happy that others seem to find God but, if he really exists, he’s not revealing anything to me. Just being honest.
I'm sorry that you are feeling forgotten by Him...that He seems silent. I pray that He would give you a reminder today that He IS with you and that He DOES hear you.
He's never let and will be there at the right moment. You be still and know he is God!!
May his face shine upon you I pray in the name of Jesus!!!
I cannot forgive God for allowing such evil to destroy my life.
Same he do to much
My husband tried to kill me forced me to have a late term abortion a son. And called Mr a ba y killer when he felt like it. Women ext I would pray for him I loved the lord so much I was 20s He slapped me hurt me so bad one night I was so hurt I cried out on my stairs "Lord what do I do?" I hears audibly. "Forgive" I wouldn't forgive q d it ruined my life with God I don't know what was gonna happen if I did maybe he would have gone .maybe arrested maybe anything. But I ended up miserable like a dog back eating the vomit. Now years of backsliding I've been trying to fix my relationship with the lord. And rely on what redid on the cross for forgiveness. Hes got a plan for you please stay with him
Finally, someone who is where I am and knows the depths of just no longer having faith. Built your life around it, hope in it, yet find yourself very disappointed with the outcomes. Church, small grpup,prayer, sozos, but nothing. I've been here for a decade now. Just dead on inside
You gonna win the fight just keep fighting
I know about the dead inside. I've fought the good fight of faith even nearly dying five times. I'm tired of fighting I just want some peace, a break from battle after battle.
Me too I feel exhausted and mentally tired and losing the little string of faith I have inside just empty
I’ve been there. I know it’s easier said than done but you’ve got to change your perspective and be okay with the fact that He is sovereign and we are not. All things work together for the good of those that love God and are called according to His purposes. Praise your way through. Your praise is a weapon. Lean on God and i promise it will pass. The word says that many are the afflictions of the righteous but the Lord delivereth them out of them all. You will be delivered. Please believe it and hold on.
@@ElizabethThorpe815 But that is a promise you can not keep. My Mom had a strong relationship with God and she suffered her entire life and it did not pass until she passed away. Many others are the same. It has led me to question is there really any point whatsoever to this life we live?
Just seeing this today and i will be praying for everyone however God is God He is love He is good He is faithful. Please remember we have a real enemy who resists us day and night. None of the things that happen to us are God's fault. We are in a battle. Spiritual warfare is real. Walking in the Spirit is dying to your emotions to your feelings. So no matter how you feel push through. God rewards those who diligently seek Him. I love Psalm 40:1-3 the nlt version. You can turn those scriptures into a prayer. Be blessed everyone ❤
It's raw honestly with God and everyone close to us that helps with the healing. I discovered Jason's song, "Remind Me Who I Am" and fell in love with it. Recently, he did a show where he opened with that beloved song. I stayed in my car after parking at home to listen and sing along. After seeing this, I will try and be more aware to pray for Jason and others on this comment page. God bless. Thanks for sharing your gift.
Hi there. I recently discovered that same exact song. I fell in love with it instantly. I was going through the phase of losing my mother and it stings but it comforts at the same time. God bless.
Raw honesty. I like that phrase.
Amen!
This helps me so much. I’ve been in such a dark season for some time now. I’ve been depressed and anxious and ultimately just sad. Sometimes I get discouraged because it feels like I don’t have the Holy Spirit anymore. Then from there I just spiral into thinking that God is done with me and has thrown me away because I’ve sinned and been disobedient too much. It feels never ending but this gave me hope.
Thanks for sharing. I still have my up and down days. The down days are like you described...God is done with me and I am without hope.
Isaiah 41:8-9
Isaiah 43:1
Isaiah 54:4
Isaiah 54:19
I've been in the same situation many times in the past year. The Lord used these verses to soothe me and encourage me in those terrible moments.
Remember, He's holding onto YOU. He fought for you before you were His. Just imagine how He'll fight for you now. Never give up, or forget His love for you.
@@jjguyton9641 Thank you so much😭
I can totally relate to this. This season for me has been filled with so many ups and downs, so much so that I became apathetic in my faith, but God is restoring my joy again. Never believe that God is done with you. We all mess up. Once we repent, He forgives, restores, and accepts us back with open arms. Day by day, say yes to Him and try not to mediate on your mistakes.❤️
How are you now??
This is why I love honesty especially in something such as faith. I recently lost mine on Easter of all days. It felt like a candle lost its light and a new journey started for me. I’ve lost hope, gained it and flailing to say it lightly. I usually write the word, “but” with a comma cause there was always a, “Life is like this which is horrible, but Jesus…” and it just hasn’t resonated like before. I’ve decided to get plugged into a church, be honest with my spouse about it and hopefully she doesn’t have her faith shaken since she’s seen how much it’s changed me over the years. I truly feel lost, angry, and left alone by God. I’m hurt to say the least. He loves and yet we go thru these trials where if I just believed in my heart, I know the strength would be there to endure. It’s suffering that plagues my everyday life. I’m just waiting on Jesus to shine a light back in my heart and tell me He’s always been there even when I’m scared. Even when the light of the loving Christ vanish within me. It’s okay. I just keep trying to remind myself of when I first believed. When I felt something so real and tangible open past the ceiling walls at that church to pour in my heart. I felt a change then. And honestly, I keep asking myself do I need to feel it now? Maybe a little less when I just remember His presence and being more real to me than reality itself. Maybe, I just need to remember when my spiritual heart was first opened up and I believed.
I gave my life to God and my life became more effed up, 17 years thrown away like nothing. God was never there for me once and made me more sick to my stomach till i really developed a chronic autoimmune dissease! Nowadays i struggle with mental health issues and social isolation and large mountain of problems that the faith in God gave me! Why do i so deeply cling to my faith still even though it destroys me?! And dont tell me i destroyed my life, you dont know me or my story! It became the worst of the worst since i repented! I can absolutely not relate to the guy in the video. No happy end here.
I understand what You are saying
I’ve been very ill. Doctors are worthless. I always believed God would step in when I really needed him. I’ve prayed so many nights to be healed or let me die. I just have nightmares and wake to a nightmare. I still have faith. God works in his time. Blessing to all.
You really said doctors are worthless
Wait til she dies and refuses to get a doctor lol
@@Number.1Yanfei.Fan123
After the last 3 years of them pushing the snake venom juice
They most certainly are worthless
Lee.. I'm praying for you
@@Number.1Yanfei.Fan123They are, largely.
God cursed me as a child I have gone through abuse for decades, I don't bother with god much because he never cared
God doesn’t curse anyone maybe he gave you those experiences you could help others instead of cry about it
@@vanliferr4079"God gave you those experiences..." Dude, you're a creep.
That has been one of the hardest things to deal with as a Christian. All my good friends have apostatized. It has left me alone and missing them. They don't want God or to hear from me as a Christian anymore. Coping with life's disappointments is a test from God of our expectations. It takes many forms.
I just had my best friend openly reject his faith in Jesus to me after so many years running with him. It made me cry horribly. And I still pray that he finds his way back and that God does a good work in him. I will pray for your friends
@@alecferguson8428 (sigh) I had pretty much the same thing happen. A close "Christian" and best friend for many years denied Jesus and tried to deconvert me. It was like handling a death as I cried too. Other close friends just slipped away and ghosted me, not wanting to talk to me about God anymore. I will pray for you and your friends too.
I am reminded of the parable of the sower, also too the prodigal son. Never know if your friends will return or not, pray for them, let them come to you..as now they have excommunicated themselves. If they do come, be gracious, speak the truth in love..meanwhile I'll pray you find your solace in the Lord and that he might gift you with committed friends. Seek ye first the kingdom of God..God helping you. In Christ..🦋
@@alecferguson8428 Allehuia..good news..thankful the Lord worked in his heart, a spirit of repentance and faith. Will pray for him, to continue..
It’s so hard to keep faith in this religion, I also want to give up 😵💫😵💫.
I’ve been waiting over 7 years to have an encounter with God that was meaningful to me, and it to change my life. I’ve tried to move on but I can’t. It’s something imbedded so deep in me I can’t get past it now. Jesus help me I don’t know what to do anymore
You can get past it. With man things are impossible, but with God all things are possible. Remember how the early church members were suffering, deeply hurting because of their faith in Christ. Prophets slaughtered because of their faith and boldness. Suffering is biblical. Hurting is biblical. And so is Gods promises to us. Even I, right now, am going through things that hurt terribly. But the Glory of God will be revealed in the victory. You got this because God got you.
God hates me and I want to get over the abandonment 😢
@jordan, how are you today? could I message you to talk more about this?
@@Kressa1111No!!! He loves you very much, Kressa1111!
I'm waiting to die at this point. I won't share my agony. No point. Praying is futile. Having Faith is a cruel lie. It just is what it is. Giving false hope is just painful and frustrating. The bible is nothing but human interpretation that means nothing to me anymore. I don't care anymore, i dont try anymore. I just exist in a dark room. I stay away from everyone. I don't try to even understand why, or try to get better. It's completely pointless. I do not wish this life or pain on anyone.
I can fully relate to what You are going through 👋😔
I'm so sorry that you are struggling. I just prayed for you and I am asking God to give you a reminder today that He is with you. He loves you. Don't give up.
@991JOYFM Thankyou, that truly means a lot..
@@simmorella ❤️🩹I am sorry.. we just have to keep going. It's hard, I understand.
@@RuthRobisonThankyou so much. I Hope things are getting better for You. 🙏👋
These thoughts resonate so very deeply with me. The doubt, the pulling away, the isolation from the body of Christ that divorce created, all were very real. The struggle of fighting those demons of the mind and trying to figure out who you are in the ‘after’ can be so depressing and challenging. I also struggled with being angry with God for not ‘saving’ my marriage. I’m still working on ALL of those things, but thank you Jason for articulating so well your struggles and your victories with these same things!
have lost your faith from jesus and mary if yes why
Agreed 100%. I wish I could say my faith is back where it once was but I don’t know if it ever will be. But when I’m angry at God, I have never been afraid to tell Him. He knows my heart anyways. It’s a struggle, but I haven’t given up.
Same
God is with you!!!!! He loves you, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3:16). What a blessing! What unspeakable mercy and love poured out on us before we were even born. I will be praying for you!
I often wonder if as we get older we have to shed the simple beliefs we have about God so we can be free from the religious restraints that "we in our young minds chose with what we knew about God" to discover Hod for who he really is that only a mature mind can comprehend. Psychologically speaking it's true. We age out of our beliefs but we don't change them in many categories. God is no different. God doesn't get alarmed about our questions because he knows it will lead us deeper and when we go deeper we see values we didn't know could be ours before
What is the point of prayer if the undesirable situation you are trying to prevent will still happen regardless …
I truly want to always be connected to God and have faith but it is far too difficult too many disappointments and let downs … feels like game playing like with a no good boyfriend or something, heart break after heart break
Sigh ….😢
Faith isn’t based on feelings. In seasons of depression even if you can only hold onto a few verses you must trust God’s word over your feelings. #fight the fight of faith #live by faith not sight
Even one verse of God's word has His power in it. I wish I could always recognize that.
It seems like everyday I'm not necessarily losing my faith, but I'm losing evidence for God. The evidence that used to be satisfactory now doesn't mean anything to me.
So I'm learning how to walk by faith alone, but it's terrifying.
I am walking through this right now. It’s a beautiful and hard lesson. Faith is not a feeling. Christ always shows up. He is good.
BS. The words only have value if connected to the one who spoke them!
@@gregsmith5875 okay then, when you’re depressed and anxious, are you gonna rely on your feelings for your faith? No. The truth is the basis of faith. Not feelings. The truth produces feelings but not always.
@@alecferguson8428 You have no idea what you're talking about, do you?
This is extremely validating for me. I'm still angry with God for things that happened in my family in 2017. I still believe and obey as I can but it's hard a lot of times. I'm glad I'm not alone in this feeling.
I do pray that it heals
God is with you!!!!! He loves you, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3:16). What a blessing! What unspeakable mercy and love poured out on us before we were even born. I will be praying for you!
If everyone would be honest, we’ve all had these same feelings. And I’ve experienced bouts of deep depression too. When I finally realized that God actually wants us to question the “whys”. It keeps us in communication with him. He loves us through it all.
I am honestly done with god I feel like i am just lost man
First time I ever heard anyone talk about what it feels like to “not” want your faith to go away, but still watching it slip away outside of your control. I haven’t been blessed like this man to have it restored though.
I'm mad at God, but what difference does it make to him? Does he heal me? Does he help me? I've been in emotional and mental pain for 33 years....where is he?
I really understand. Been waiting even way longer in my case. 😔👋
i came here to find answers, hmmmm i'm Just a wreck, I'm battling with faith, No job, wanna get married but no money, literally everyone around me is doing very well but me, went into a mild depression early this year and bounced back but thing are just falling apart, i can't pray anymore cuz whats the point on doing so. i don't want to give up because of my mum, who lost my dad 2021 September, I want to be strong for her, i even pretend to be ok when she calls me but i am far from ok, the worse part of this whole thing is that i don't see it getting better. Not sure why i'm pouring all this out here on this platfrom but i'm hoping i feel relieve after this. i am so tired of the Silence from Jehovah.
It seems like a lot, but there is nothing that God cannot fix.
The only thing we do not know is how and when, but what we can do is follow him still. Through the silence we follow, when it seems all is wrong we follow. Not to receive a fix but to find Him, to know Him. We follow because it us only Him that can give our soul rest.
Question is what does it mean to follow Him?
How can you follow Him?
I am open to helping you today. Feel free to reach out.
I am feeling this right now. My entire life has been a struggle, i was abused by my mother and sexually molested by my father. It still affects me in adulthood. Everyday im in survival mode. I really feel like God hates me.
God is so evil.
Listening to this..I'm pissed. I've had all the opportunities to be married and have kids. I chose the route that was morally responsible. I've been punished for that decision
If you're a man I don't see why you can't still have children
My case is very complicated, it all started by studying the bible more deeply and realizing that it has many moral and historical inconsistencies, knowing that there really are no original manuscripts and that the ones that exist are different from each other, battling with all that I also saw a lot of debates on the subject of evil and suffering and I really don't see that Christian apologists have a good defense. Finally, my wife, who gives her whole life to serving in a ministry, has lupus, it advances very strongly and very fast. All of which makes me wonder after 20 years of being a very active Christian, "Does God really exist?" I have asked God for a single sign, a single supernatural sample of his existence, however small it may be, it would serve me well, and nothing happens. People say: "God is testing your faith", but perhaps God doesn't know the depths of me? Others say "It's so that you realize how your faith is" and I say, ok I know that my faith It's a mess and I've failed this "test", now could you please stop choking me? and I don't find an answer, I don't know if there is a return, there is very little of a believer left in me, I really don't want to lose my faith, but everything makes it go away.
Amen. Does He feed off our pain?
Understood. Too many folks think these struggles are about "feelings" (as if feelings were not totally integrated into our perception of facts) when really it is often about information and perception. The Holy Spirit is supposed to guide us but when all perceptions are hellish, it becomes difficult to believe that it is true. Without feelings of any kind, no person would come to faith or have an innate sense of right and wrong (which can be the case with sociopathy) so the idea of guilt or evil becomes moot, along with beauty and goodness. I'm really sorry to hear you are struggling, it is very difficult. I'm praying for you (and me) as I type this. May God bless you with faith.
Are you better now?
God has left me 😢! I pray for good things and everything happens opposite. I am beyond done with this world and I don’t want to live anymore! I didn’t chose this, but I feel my faith is slipping out of my hands.
I need some help. I am suffering in all ways of many years like the total life in my career or health or peace everything is a total failure.. No matter how much i pray and try to be be faithful i break down in pain. I feel like God has abandoned me.. I couldn't bear the pain. There are many times when the message of pastor aligns with me and felt like God spoke to me.. But it turns out the things which God spoke to me through messages doesn't aligns with the results (for example my career). I don't know what to do. Am totally feeling useless with no talent in this earth. I feel like a failure. I couldn't breathe feeling suffocated. Has God given up on me?
I can relate to You and what You are going through.
Not having grown up in the Church gave me a realistic picture of life's hardship with nowhere to turn. Welcome to the normal Christian life.
Sometimes I wish that I hadn’t grown up in the church
Sometimes I wish the church equipped me for anything other than a fast food expectation and with almost no tools to survive the actual christian experience.
@@DukeOfCoolsville the most powerful tool GOD GAVE IS THE POWER OF PRAYER
It sounds like you don't know Christ when you say you have nowhere to run.
Your last sentence is spot on and I will say it, it absolutely sucks.
this is how im starting to feel...i just feel tired and fed up and cant seem to understand what im not doing right
gods love is transactional. the harder you work and obediant, the more gods love come in
however, there are a large group of people whom god decided to neglect and forsake. it could be that youre one of those people
@@JMRabil675 What if God had forsaken you even when you were a child?
God, if a God exists seems to love the nasties and the awfuls (the best way I can put it without using vulgarities) the most horrible people seem to have outstanding luck. And they don't appreciate how lucky they are and how they evade justice and karma. And they actively work at making an unfair world even worse and without any negative consequences for them. If a God existed it could curb them but since a God if it is all powerful did nothing to restrain monsters like Hitler it obviously wouldn't bother to chastise the infinite little monsters.
I love God though i have lost hope and faith in Him struggling to maintain a relationship with Him because i dont wanna loose Him.its a struggle when you dont know
Cause and effect controls life it seems. How much of divine intervention is just the effect of the work WE put into it, not some outside force? Im starting to wonder. Not that God doesnt exist, but that he won't do or cant do everything he says. I need confirmation Im wrong and need it soon or that's the conclusion I'm sticking with.
Honesty is probably the best gift we can give God.
and each other xx
My wife and I have had to walk through two sons with autism. I totally understand the dark places we can get to as we wrestle with God. I can honestly say He is good and He is worthy to be praised.
Thanks for saying this...I was also in that dark place after my son was diagnosed with autism until He showed up and rescued me during the pandemic when all the plan A and plan B failed... and Jesus showed me He is faithful and I can trust him. He is faithful ..loyal..kind and merciful🙌 ....fast forward post covid..He is reading now and communicating better after 15 months of staying home during covid ..at 12 years old!..the past 15 months have been the most challenging for our family but He rescued me..... Jesus said he will be with us in all circumstances...we just listen to the voice of the accuser who tells us we are either unworthy of his love or he doesn't love us or care..thanks again for your post.
My husband and I have 3 sons with autism. And 4 other children.
Clinging to Jesus.
@@kathleenvisscher9608 Why, he's a joke if he is real.
How many vaccines did you give them
I have high functioning autism and I struggle like right now to trust God. It is also a full moon at this time and I feel tense around a moon
I will never understand why some people feel his presence and have encounters and yet others never do. I keep blaming myself though, maybe i am just not praying enough or reading the bible enough. Either way God bless everyone here who is struggling.
The comments give me so much peace. This year i decided to give my level best. Everyday i have given my best. It may not have been enough but i gave my 110%. To everything. Love life and connections. In a hope that life would improve. Things will change. But they never do. I kept getting hurt. Happiness never lasted long with me. Everything that makes me happy god snatches away from me. I cant do this anymore. I am angry. So so angry at god. What did i do to deserve this? Why me? Dont you ever pity me? I have been true and pure and given throughout my life. Then why me? I never asked you for anything. Only for one thing. Dont you ever look at me? Dont you love me? Arent you with me? Watching over me?
I can fully relate to Your situation 😔👋
That is definitely relatable! I've been pushed to the limit for years, the last few months being extreme, my job is killing me. Sure, money keeps rolling in, but I can barely sleep and doesn't even have the energy to take a shower for days on end. Been begging God for a change but have only been recieving even more work and more stress. A few nights ago I finally snapped and shouted names at him. Right now I just feel empty.
I know that he is real, I just don't think he cares very much anymore. I am just so exhausted: physically, mentally and spiritually. I know that I eventually will have to make my peace with him but that day is not quite yet, meanwhile, if anyone, I mean anyone, comes up to my face with the "God is always good", I think I will ram a full-size Bible down their throat by force!
TO EVERYONE HERE.. THE DEVIL DOESN'T FIGHT HIS PPL, HE ATTACKS CHRISTIANS SO THEY GO BACK TO HIM, STAY STRONG AND TRUST I GOD, SURRENDER YOURSELF.. YOUR HEART AND THOUGHTS TO HIM
I was raised Christian in upbringing.
Me and my dad are Homeless.
Chased out of our home by crooked cops, courts, and a scheming mother.
We've survived and survived trial after trial, hardship after hardship, over and over...
They do not reprieve or stop for even a second.
Not enough money to survive in a world FUELED by money.
Greedily wanting every dime they can take from us...
Cannot trust anyone.
Everyone we run into (for help) ends up being a psychopath.
People in public always staring and watching us.
Group(s) of people (unknown, hiding and attacking us from the shadows)
The plotting and scheming relentlessly behind our backs grows more intense.
It never stops.
These "planned" and "calculated" problems (or traps), stopping us from being able to survive.
Transportation-less, and soon to be shelter-less and job-less.
A demonic presence or force trying to dismantle our lives, using everyone around us.
Trying to guarantee our deaths.
The Devil follows us everywhere we go.
Praying and pleading for help does nothing.
God... does nothing.
MY faith, gone.
Doom is now imminent.
And death, probably not far behind it.
Me too trying hard for soooooo long. So tired …. And overwhelmed
Im trying so hard to keep my faith . Its like God dont care about me . VERY WORRISOME
I lost my faith i want it back but i no longer chant
What Psalm did you read? I am so lost right now. Angry about all the losses and changes in my life. Praying for healing or death. I know God cares and works in his own time but this years ive been waiting and i am so tired depressed and worn down. This msg gives me a spark of light. Thank you!
Constant failure made me lose hope in god I stopped praying there is no god
I love this so much! Thank you for being humble and sharing.
God ain’t real and it makes me sad. I’ve been angry at god for a long time now and have prayed for him to show up in my life now for the past year and i’ve just gotten silence. I’m tired of waiting. Today I truly feel nothing inside me, and I think it’s the last day i’ll spent a single second hoping and praying for god.
Now, hold on a minute. I understand you're angry but I think you're taking it too far. You can be angry but still keep your faith. You can tell God why you're mad but it's like any relationship, you have to talk it out. If you just give up like that, you'll never have a successful relationship with anyone ever. I just lost 50% of my hearing and I'm upset but I'm praying it out and talking to God about it. Do you still have your sight and hearing? This is God we're talking about. You can't just leave him. Where would you go. I love you brother. I really do. I'll pray for you. Don't give up now
This is where I am in my faith. I don’t feel like praying or going to church again. I prayed to God to bless me with a normal baby boy when I found that we were pregnant after a long time. I specifically asked God. Now my son is developmentally delayed. I have been a believer for a long time. I have been praying to God to change my son’s situation but he has been silent. I have struggled with believing Him and trusting again. I have prayed, fasted and no changes. I am giving up on him and if he wants to take me away so be it. I hope he can answer because my faith in Him is down.
Please do not give up on the Lord. He has a plan for your beautiful little boy: "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11 NKJV). He loved you before the world was even formed! "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love" (Ephesians 1:3-4). He is with you!!!!! He loves you, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3:16). What a blessing! What unspeakable mercy and love poured out on us before we were even born. I will be praying for you!
@@WestieLuver2011 thanks for the encouragement. I just hope God can change things because this is hard.
Unfortunately god does not do healings, none documented.. it's extremely depressing..
@@olentangyriver1191 only God can heal. The only reason people become healed from physical illness and become saved from their sins is because of the Lord Jesus’s work on the cross and His new life after He was crucified and buried. He resurrected from the dead so that whosoever believes in Him would not perish but have eternal life! Eternal life with God, in total good health and fulfillment.
@@olentangyriver1191God Does and Will HEAL! NOT ON OUT TIMING, BUT HIS PERFECT TIMING.
DON'T THROW IN THE TOWEL.
One of the realest "christian" artists that ive ever heard thst actually appears to be a real christian. Incredible
Jason Gray, your struggles with faith and the music that resulted from it has helped many, including myself, to have hope in our own struggles with faith. I love your music! And I love Acoustic Story Time on The Message. Fav song: Remind Me You're Here. Thank you!
my faith is dying ..................
Growing pains, Jason,we all have growing pains. God loves us and will redeem his creation when it's time.♥️
I had my faith come back after years of non belief. I was so excited and happy because I felt Jesus with me until I met a Christian who told me that no I was not actually saved now I am depressed and struggling with non belief again.
I have a similar story, except for the "Christian" who is making you doubt. Just go back to being excited and happy in the presence of Jesus. Don't worry about this other person's opinion. Jesus is more concerned with your soul than anyone else can be. He'll show you what He wants you to believe. Just stay in His presence.
@@waitdontwaitrecordsI believe there Is a God but I don't believe he will do anything for us
I started to believe God is evil
Because Christianity is not real. Its made up to keep thr massive in check around the world. God is not some external outside being. God is inside of you. You direct your life. You were made in his image he give you the tools to master yourself. Give him thanks
,,WHATEVER YOU ASK IN MY NAME YOU WILL RECEIVE" *I ask him in Jesus name for last half a year,dont receive*I am praying and asking in Jesus name and Jesus aint doing anything I am loosing faith in him
Beautiful testimony, it saved me from walking away from God. I’m struggling with patiences and I’m angry with God because he’s taking too long to answer my prayer.
But through faith, I must understand that it’s his timing and not mine. Lord, I love you. Hear our cries. Amen.
Amen!!! Please do not give up on the Lord. He has a plan for your life: "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11 NKJV). He loved you before the world was even formed! "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love" (Ephesians 1:3-4). He is with you!!!!! He loves you, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3:16). What a blessing! What unspeakable mercy and love poured out on us before we were even born. I will be praying for you!
Baptism of fire 🔥. Everyone quits at the book of Acts and says God doesn't do all that stuff anymore, but he does. I get mad at God, but a lot of my issues are probably consequences of my own dumb choices. Now I'm mad at God for not getting me out of the hole I dug for myself. Even so...
I feel the same way.... im so bummed. It has caused depression. My life has been devastated. This all could have been prevented,.. I just needed help.
Same boat here sister.. I know what I should do but I hesitate and then I feel like I don’t know what to do… don’t know if it makes any sense
Wow! Yes I totally am there with him! I thought that nothing could ever shake my faith, but then the last 3 years have really shaken me and one of them is facing divorce and you feel like you can't be mad at God because you "aren't supposed to be". "You shouldn't question God, just trust" right? I think David was a prime example of expressing his emotions to God and he was considered a man after God's own heart, so there has to be something to that relationship that God wants in our relationship with Him. I have to question is it openess and laying everything before Him? I mean after all, He does say cast your cares upon Him. Thank you for sharing your experience and part of your journey.
I wouldn't be disappointed in a God. And I am an unspecified theist as I tell my own people in my vids. But believing in the Christian God just doesn't make sense--if you do the research. If you just listen to Pastor Bob at the local Evangelical church it does make sense--because they haven't researched anything and that includes Pastor Bob. The fact vs the speculation is that there is no authorship of anyone who witnessed a resurrection of Jesus or his miracles prior. None. The fact is we have no idea who wrote the Gospels--at all. The fact is it was all written decades at best after the fact of Yeshua which makes one believe that it was all a later urban legend. Cheers, DCF
Jason, you have been a ridiculous encouragement through so much! Your honesty and desire to hold on as hard as you can are just so refreshing consistently. Thank you!
God ..... people born and live in different circumstances, situation, environment, family...and in the end he wants to judge? Same to all people? I think he doesn't deserve to judge!! ......just my thoughts.........❤
Thank you for sharing your story! I can relate on many levels. Especially wrestling with God and learning to be brutally honest with Him. “Hallelujah I’m going through hell. Hallelujah I’m still singing it is well.” These are powerful words!
Amen wonderful words. 🙏❤️🩹
Does god really exist, im beginning to think he doesn't
Go to a cancer hospital for kids. Tell me is you see Gods work! 😊
This! This! This! It’s the humanity of being God’s children that sometimes I need to hear more. This is why in the Bible people like David make me feel validated through my walk. It’s not easy and we get to low places but God! I needed this!
Sat down with him and told him what I was really feeling-not how I thought it should be. This is it…why do we think we can hide from God?
After all Jesus asked the Father why have you forsaken me.
Thank you for sharing this, loved the analogy of your sons anger being a wall between you, I believe the same is true in our relationship with Jesus, when we try and ‘be’ the ‘right’ Christian yet harbor much unspoken suffering there is a wall that will remain until we surrender all.
I could only "like" once, but I like you and your vulnerability so much more!!
Where you were is where I'm at. He doesn't hear me and it sucks. It's like a life without purpose.
Wow! Our stories of brokenness, “dead” faith, and disappointment are so similar! Thankful that He is a perfect loving Father and Healer; always faithful, even through our faithless times. Thank you, Jason, for sharing your story. It shows others going through similar struggle that while the LORD may ALLOW His children to be broken, He never ABANDONS us, and always creates something new and wonderful out of the brokenness.
One thing that God did for me, is that I thought that I would never find love, and then love came when I least expected it. It came in the form of someone I knew since college, since 2004.
youre delulu
I feel helpless
You’re helping so many of us on our walk…..you’ve helped me on mine for years now. I ask others to walk with you…so God can use you to help them in their walk too. Much love for the part you’ve played in my walk.
Did God abandon me? No.. he was never around to begin with.
Im just another NPC.
At this point, I have mentally, spiritually, and emotionally shut down in order to protect myself from being let down.
Don’t give up
The lies of the church... All about motivating you to give money and labor. I just learned that God knit me for a purpose and apparently that was of a McDonald's toy not one of his beloved Xboxes who were abusive in his name.
You walk alone .You were always alone ..the quicker you get to understand that & come to terms with that the better it will be ..im not trying to waver you but for you not stuggle ..try a diff appraoch now ..Gods Not Gona Help You ..only u can help urself ..even when you think its god ..its just you
The idea that God just manipulates everything in our lives is pure insanity. Rather he intervenes in some sort of mysterious way if we look to him. This loss of faith is due to western christianity fitting God into a box and associating him with what is on this world. If you could see that he is not in control of everything in the way you think. Then you could maintain your faith in him. A relationship with God has nothing to do with how your life plays out. Its beyond that. It is the knowledge of his hand in all that is. Everything Good came from him.
Thank you Jason Gray. I’m sorry to hear about your loss in divorce. I am right there with the loss of our daughter going through 2 years without her and approaching our 3rd year coming in August. I really don’t know how I made it this far without her. My faith too has been wrecked but still have it because without God I don’t know how to do anything. Grief doesn’t go away but hope lives on and I know she went before us to heaven and I’m looking forward to our turn to be together in heaven. Thank you for your heart and music that has resonated with me in many ways. Jesus loves you and I do too. God bless you right here right now. Amen
Debbie I pray that in those moments you miss your daughter you would be comforted by our Heavenly Father. I lost my grandmother due to cancer and I can’t express how much I miss her. But May God send the presence of the king of peace where ever you may be 💕
Dear Debbie having lost our beautiful son I know what you are going through and wondering how you can carry on. God will always be there to help you through, you are so much closer to Him than you can realise, and your daughter is praying for you too because she loves you. God helped me in ways I can only be ever thankful for as I felt I couldn't go on with my life and prayed for years to die myself, and after 7 years of praying to die, I was admtted to hospital and hoping this was it that my prayers to die were finally going to be answered but whilst there one afternoon I had this dream that my son was on top of a lovely green hill, in the sunshine with other children and happy and smiling and he was waving to me and said 'not yet mum' I woke up. If that had just been it it was a lovely dream but I smoked at the time and when I woke up I asked the nursing staff if I could go out and have a cigarette and they let me out the back door to a place I that I had never seen whilst there, and there in the back of the hospital grounds was a big green hill just like in my dream, 2 big green hills in fact, as if one wouldn't have been enough, and I knew it was a sign from God and my son to carry on with my life. You will be given strength everyday Debbie, to bring you through the hardest time(s) of your life. It is written 'Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.' I share this with you to reinforce that God loves you and has you and your daugher in His loving arms. Recently, decades later I have made a big mistake due to depression and anxiety, and had a complete breakdown, and now I have to remember to fall back on into God's loving arms and cling to Him even though I just want to go home myself and sometimes have doubted God lately, as I do not get the sense of God as I use to in those early years of losing our son and I miss that so much, but I do know He is still there because I once felt so surrounded by His love and I have to trust Him completely because He has not brought me this far to leave me now. You will be given something too, in due time, that all is well.
Yeah, sometimes I feel like I hit a dead end, that my life isn’t where it used to be, and I question if God has taken me this far just to leave me at a dead end.
Also, I lost two very dear and close friends, a few years ago or so. I miss them a lot. It’s like a chunk of my life has been taken out. It’s not the same anymore. We used to joke about funny names of our Uber drivers and talk about the weather, and go to movies and trips and outings. There’s a hole in my heart where they used to be, but I don’t know if I’ll even see them again. I don’t know if I’ll see them in heaven. They were really good people(though one of them had both bad and good sides to him), but they were good people, especially the other one with how much he did for the disabled community, he was so giving, he was an outstanding person. But good people don’t go to heaven. 😢 Forgiven people do.