lmao this made me cry from laughter i always laugh in depressing situations and people find it really strange. its so you cant cry from how depressing they are it makes it almost comical in a way to not face the depressing reality.
@@kittynakamoto2449 its not even a cultural difference lots of people do it all over the world its called nervous laughter. when my last gf broke up with me all i could do is laugh. she got really, REALLY mad.
wrong. people have never been able to deal with reality. we always fear what we can't control, what we don't understand or simply what we just think we don't like. this behavior is deeply rooted in humanity as a whole, and what we're seeing is just a manifestation of that due to the over-abundance of people, resources, progress of technology, etc., because reality is becoming easier to ignore every day.
luvsdecor But your concept of reality is based on social constructs, which are just man-made things in an attempt to put order and routine into daily life. Your reality isn’t any more real than the people in the video’s reality.
There's something deeply sad about this though. Like a reflection on a lake, distorted by the ripples, of a society that's lost its way and will soon be gone.
In spite of the up-beat tone of the film, I find it troubling too. Just another way of exploiting those who have been made to feel alienated by the modern world. I hope this lady finds something better in the future.
"For her this is more important than marriage itself" That's all you need to know. She doesn't actually care about marriage. What she wants is a wedding and those two things are not the same. She wants the dress and the pictures and the and all the material aspects of it, not the lifelong commitment.
The princess thing has gotten way out of hand. There was a really good book written a few years ago now called “The Narcessism Epedemic: Living in the Age of Narcessism" which had a whole chapter on this one subject！That said, she has been honest aand has not used anybody in the process, which I do respect in one way, although it seems fairly rediculous. This could just as easily have been done as cultural satire!
I hear some people say that the concept of marrying bcuz of "love" is a new "western' idea!! In ancient time people married each other in order to carry the family name and having kids so that that kids can take care of the parents when they get older.so I see nothing wrong with a woman marrying a husband bcuz of "money"!!
The self-help/coaching industry makes tons of money every year by masturbating people's egos and their unrealistic expectations all over the world. This is nothing new...
Actually, if you paid attention, the only women doing this are high in self esteem. The women who are depressed about being single aren't throwing these parties.
because women are career obsessed, no man wants a career woman and no woman wants to be a housewife today. so its not all mgtows fault, it's globalisation
In a sense, the women are the ones rejecting relationships even more (not surprising since they have the most social pressure). Ppl complain that men in Japan do not seek sexual partners, but women are even less likely to.
qjtvaddict : "Sherren Pulcher the work culture is to blame for the death of families in Japan" == Young people not getting marred is a worldwide trend. So is low fertility rate, at least in the developed countries Japan or not Japan.
Thank you for not adding into the useless sexist rants in this comment section. You really get it. ^_^ This is a socioeconomic problem of hyperconsumerism, hypermaterialism and over exaggeration of a failed economic system that doesn't benefit human survival.
Something changed and it wasn’t just men . They reacted to what women wanted. See what most modern women don’t get is after 25 there looks are starting to decline. All those years spent studying and getting a job and ignoring the fact that men are interested in them but failed to acknowledge this because of study and work means that men waited around far to long to become interested in relationships . They found other things to do. If you couple this with fact women after 25 and beyond are now desperate to have children. It doesn’t feel to men your getting married for love . But to be a sperm Donner and a cash machine that could be divorced at any time if she so chooses. Marriage is far to late these days for men to be interested . I know this not just women’s fault but society in general has changed .
@@becomingdauntless8821 welp even if they are overpopuating they are doing it with their own resources, did they beg to other countries? no. people have their own choices if they chose to reproduce its their right. i am amused how a person from another country gives lecture and opinions about countries that have nothing to do with them or their country. We should RESPECT everyone choices just like they respect ours.
Not every is fortunate enough to find love. What she did reminds me of kids who go to their prom even though they did not have a date but have a good time anyway. The events are milestones and people can still experience the joy by going through the ceremony. This lady valued herself enough to make the effort and now may be resigned to the fact she may never find a mate. Here in the US, what she did is called a commitment ceremony.
FurKids OnBoard I cannot find anything admirable in her fruitless attempt to live a fantasy. A more fruitful way might be working on her attitude (men can’t handle confident women) and improve on building meaningful relationships rather than chasing a pointless dream. Start by making herself beautiful inside, I am certain it will only increase her chances to meet a man who loves her for being herself. If she still cannot find a mate, at least she will make true friends rather than keep going to singles events and fortune tellers. What is there to admire for this fruitless, lonely existence?
You're lucky to have had 1 love in your lifetime. I have been lucky to have found love. We were 3 weeks away from getting married. She flew to the Philippines to bring her grandmother back for the wedding. Her plane crashed on the way there. She was pregnant with the son I never had! That's the last time I was in love. Love is worth fighting for!
I have a feeling this will become more and more common place, not only in Japan but in other countires (as it is here in the states from the reports I've read)
I was seriously thinking about doing this for myself.. Sick of the toxic nature of.. Waiting... On some level no matter how happy I am I feel I deserve love and every once in a while I wonder if its ever going to happen.. Its not even sad it's just annoying.. Marrying your self seems like a great way to put that needy part to bed once and for all.. I fully support it
@@kkibela If it's merely an annoyance or like you said "neediness", then no, you are not experiencing deficiency in love. What you are experiencing is absence of some marker that symbolizes the rite of formation of a committed couple - but not the deep love bond aspect of a couple's relationship.
@@kkibela I'm saying minor annoyance/"neediness" is a trivial thing. The wedding ceremony in itself as merely a marker is a trivial thing. If you are experiencing serious deficiency in love, that's a serious thing. The wedding ceremony symbolizing the beginning of a lifetime of love and fulfillment is not a trivial thing. I'm not minimizing your pain, if pain is what you are really feeling. Also, you don't need to edit your post - to convey sarcasm. Resorting to sarcasm is very immature when we are talking about serious things like loveless living which will become the norm as the world becomes more and more materialistic. All a person can do is feel happy seeing the small, beautiful things in life that still exist.
In Japan as in the USA and probably most other places, the wedding itself is fetishized. Little girls are thought to dream about their wedding day. It is the wedding day that they are dreaming of, not the day to day reality of having some guy in your life all the time. Boys are not taught to dream of wedding days. It is a cliche that while young boys were looking at Playboy, young girls are looking at bridal magazines. But cliches have some truth to them.
in the old days, the long-term success of marriage was more important than the wedding itself. then the de beers diamond company came along in the late 19nth century with the big lie that you need a ring to make a marriage. then marriages got more and more expensive, because women were taught to believe that the symbolism was more important than the reality.
Really? I was looking into gaming and Sesame Street magazines as a little girl. I dreamt of a Paleontologist and having a pet Brachiosaurus, never once wanting to be a bride. Sorry I wasn't the girly-girl. My teen years were different, but still no bridal dreams, just wet dreams. BTW, in Japan the boys looked into Hentai the most, not Playboy. Is Playbboy even a thing now-a-days? Here in the US, kids today (boys and girls) go straight into the hardcore sites. The terms and ideas little 8 year olds know these days is alarming. O_O Sometimes I feel like a virgin the way these kids talk. Oh my!
More idolised than fetishized. The concept that if a woman doesn't have a wedding in her life she's a failure. The dream is still being sold heavily to little girls. It's a remnant of US culture from the 50's that is still going strong, it comes from a time when girls were being prepped for marriage (and little else) all through their teens. If they were sent to college it was usually to find a husband.
For those who are taking a dump on marriage and relationships in the comment section , out if bitterness , you are missing the point . Finding someone is more than just finding financial or sexual stability .It's more than the illusion of "love" . It's all about finding someone who shares life with you , the good , the bad and the ugly . It's not about escaping being alone but rather being lonely .And that's what makes this video even sadder .
Why should one need a woman to escape being lonely? People don't realize that there's many people out there already that care about them, including their friends and family. It's because of this that I know I'm well valued and that I don't need validity of my own existence through a relationship.
@@micaholson1052 No one said you need validity of your own existence through a relationship. That isn't why most people have relationships or marriage. Most people just end up in a relationship and getting married because they fall in love for real. Once you truly are in love, it's almost impossible to resist being with that person and usually wanting marriage. It just happens to you. You aren't trying to validate your existence or some other silly idea.
@@johnroberts1616 Love is really nothing more than a chemical reaction in your brain. You may disagree, but the concept of love is really nothing more than a man made one. Same as marriage.
@@paolagrando5079 But she literally just met these guys. How can she expect people she just met to express interest in commitment to her. She needs to earn it. People should not commit to someone just because it is expected. They should commit when they find someone they want to commit to.
@@Zero-tm5xk We don't know, we weren't there. Maybe they were talking as a general thing. Maybe she got the gist from the way that they were talking about their life or their previous relationships.
I love this part of the Japanese culture. They turn a problem into a charming experience. In a society of shut-ins and high suicide rate, self-love and self-care is beautiful. Good for her.
Love is just a sugar coating word we use for hiding the elephant in the room. The fact that men and women both mutually have ulterior motives for getting involved with each other in the first place. If they both admit their ulterior motives, it is called prostitution. If they both hide their ulterior motives and call it love, it is romance.
I think that Asians get bored of looking at other Asians in Japan, and they just want newness or novelty. They want something that they can't find in the continent bounded by Europe and the Arctic, Pacific, and Indian oceans. They want either a black man or white man.
She may seem happy, it does not mean she really is....the fact that she got to marry herself cannot come out of happiness and cannot be happiness either....
It’s an indication Paola; people are so far up their own backsides that they can’t process how ridiculous their own behaviour is. If any young woman wanted to marry: she’d be married. If she was interested in being a good partner she would do that too. It’s not hard for a woman to find a man and have a satisfying life. But that’s not what they want. They want to be insane and they want us to accept that.
Social skills have declined worldwide because everyone is on Facebook, the internet, texting, but less meeting in person and making real, physical connections.
I agree. All of the latter you listed is so impersonal and so disattached to the real world and real people. We live our lives more separate than together which is really tragic considering that we need impartial love more than ever before. Back in the twentieth century, when technology didn't dominate all aspects of life, there was more social interaction and love. The twenty-first century tech-filled world transformed human beings into cold unloving machines who only interact when connected online. So so sad.😢
I agree. All of the latter you listed is so impersonal and so disattached to the real world and real people. We live our lives more separate than together which is really tragic considering that we need impartial love more than ever before. Back in the twentieth century, when technology didn't dominate all aspects of life, there was more social interaction and love. The twenty-first century tech-filled world transformed human beings into cold unloving machines who only interact when connected online. So so sad.😢
@Crim Sin Older people including baby boomers use social media heavily, too, the biggest being Facebook. Interacting at work is transactional, you have to do it, thats not voluntary socialization. But, when people of all ages get home, they now have many online choices for their time that did not exist 30 years ago. A higher % of people are single now, a lower % date and have sex. Less people paint, play instruments now....it's just too easy to go online and stay in that safe, addicting world.
That woman has mastered the TREAT YO SELF philosophy. It's too bad this channel has titled this video "lonely women" or wrote that she married herself because it's really not the case. At no point she's saying that she's marrying herself. She's merely enjoying a fun activity that may also reconciled herself with her dream and what she wished to be. So many comments didn't understand that and are using that as a tool to spit on feminism or western culture. I think they simply didn't watch the video and just read the title/description. What Haruna and other women did isn't that far from people cosplaying or putting on an Oiran kimono...
@@leotardbanshee Truth! Toxic men love to piss on Feminism, but it's because of Toxic Masculinity and the Patriarchy why Feminism exists and is still relevant to this day.
The title is misleading. Even the wedding planner says being alone is not necessarily the same as being lonely. This woman is enjoying her life, and part of that enjoyment was buying a wedding package for herself. I love it!
@Kuuryo yeah I agree seriously you're supposed to have a partner in marriage. And doing it alone and trying to experience it but the groom is missing is kinda pointless it's almost like she wants to escape reality and her problems that she would just plan a wedding but shes alone, its pretty sad.
@@biplav32 Haha it is funny you insisted she is lonely when you have never interacted with her 😆 I am extrovert person, and somehow I can say that I can easily connect with others, but after years of self reflection of finding what makes me more at peace and content, I find the answer in spending more time with myself. You dont really need other people to make you happy, at the end of the day--happiness is a choice. You can find happiness in every small things, learning new things on your own, I mean, there lot of happiness you can find in building a good relationship with yourself. I feel more at peace and calm and happier being by myself. But dont get me wrong, I still hang out with my friends so I can tell the difference of happiness I find by enjoying myself alone or with other. I think the difference is the happiness you find by spending time with others is sort of "temporary" and "fragile", but the happiness you can find by being yourself is sort of "long term" and "genuine". In short, I think, it is naive to think people who are alone are lonely, you would not know they are more happier than those with partners.
I married my wife together since my age 20 and my wife 19 by also doing college. In Indonesia, going marry is easy u know. Our life is very good nowadays
I must have a Japanese mentality then, I couldn't even imagine getting married at my current age of 24, Let alone at 20 yrs old, Heck not even at 29yrs old max I guess.
She is putting herself out there and hasn’t found what she’s looking for, so she is doing something for herself, I just hope she took a nice vacation after!
Yes, so sad. Divorced, but you still having to live with yourself. Looking in the mirror, pleading, "Why don't you love me, anymore?", receiving only stares and silence.
I don't think you really get what independence they're talking about. Most men are pretty independent but they still get married? I think independent means if you didn't have a husband or wife, it wouldn't stop you from living. Not that if you're independent, you no longer are able to find a relationship. I know this comment is a bit late but I just wanted you to understand the misconception
@Scott Sullivan Than change the economic system so that problem wouldn't happen. Most men don't want to settle down till they are over 40 years old.... oh but women have to deal with saggy nasty old man balls filled with deteriorated ASD sperm right? Hypocrite much?
Good for her. She has worked long and hard. She deserves to experience one if her dreams. There wouldn't be a controversy if she decided to blow her money on a vacation. This is her dream not ours.
Grace Young but this isn’t her dream she’s just doing it because she’s gettin old and thinks this is experiencing marriage. She dreams of having a man ask her to marry him
You know, the bridal agent should just pack a model groom to complete the wedding pictures lol like why not? Maybe charge a bit more for the optional groom prop lol since it’s just taking pictures and a pseudo wedding
As a woman in her 60's with two kids and a 27 year marriage, I have to disagree with almost all the comments here. Marriage and a family done correctly is a great benefit to both men and women, not to mention the children. I grew up in the age of "Women's Lib" - it was drummed into me that getting a high paying career was going to be the ultimate achievement so I waited almost too long to get married. I went to graduate school, had a well paying career and enjoyed every moment of it, but when I got married and had kids I gladly gave it up to become a full-time homemaker and stay-at-home mom. This was entirely my choice, as my husband said he would support my decision either way. I knew I could always go back to work, but my kids were not going to be little forever; being there for them was far more important. Being a good wife and mother was the most challenging job of my life but also the most gratifying. Not boring at all! I don't think that my career alone would have been enough - just ask the successful executive women who are unmarried in their 40's, 50's, and 60's. Older unattached women often end up as the crazy cat ladies. There are only so many girl's nights out, carefree trips, and designer handbags before women tire of all of it and start to want to nurture. The greatest gift you can give your kids is a stable family life, knowing who mom and dad are and that they are committed to each other. I am so grateful to my competent husband who has financially supported all of us. In return, I took care of the kids, the house, made home cooked meals every day and provided regular physical intimacy. I also continue to take good care of myself, by dressing up and making up, working out, eating well, getting my hair and nails done, etc. in order to be attractive to my husband. The 1950's traditional marriage is not right for everyone, but for us it's worked out spectacularly well. This was shocking to me because I had been brainwashed in college to think that this lifestyle was a horrible fate for women! Now, what happens to the single guys? If they are attractive and have game, they will eventually tire of one-night stands and meaningless sex; they also become lonely sad people with not much purpose to life. Without a wife, many single guys let their health deteriorate, overindulge in "fun" activities such as gambling, drugs, alcohol and porn until they end up dead of a sudden heart attack in their 50's. For both men and women, living for just yourself can become empty and boring. The moment I became a mom, I wanted to continually improve myself so I can be the best example for my kids. Single men and women - quit looking for Prince and Princess Charming and look for someone good enough.
You knowingly or unknowingly understood the meaning and purpose of marriage. The world has forgotten however what is the function of marriage. In your case, you let it perform its function and everybody in your family and most of all your children benefited from it. The reason why world is forgetting the function of marriage is the same propagandize that you also faced during your younger days, which is driven by the quest for Equality and Marxism in my observation.
Little mom Pasadena I am so happy for you. Somebody is having a good life. Most of the women I know want to get married to a great guy. Most have been divorced and want try marriage again. It all depends on you and your partner's compatibility .Lucky you. And need to have economic security, as African Americans this is a difficult situation. Once again lucky you!!! We are happy to be mothers. Love our children.
@@khem127 Hi Khem127, when you say most of the women you know have been divorced, wasn't it that only few had been divorced by their spouses, and in fact most of the time, it were those women themselves who divorced their spouses? I have heard that this is the usual case and wanted to check with you. Your another point is that it all depends on you and your partners compatibility. But I think it will also depend on how seriously you take what they tell you in Women's Lib. In case of Little mom Pasadena, she didn't take those things so seriously and gave up her career to become a full time home maker because she saw more value in that. How many women today will see more value in being home maker and be proud of that, as opposed to having a job where they take orders from a boss and work for customers? Which one would be more fulfilling between those two options for most Women? I think Little Mom Pasadena was an exception as she thought being a Home Maker was more fulfilling rather than having a job where she would have taken orders from a boss and worked for customers.
@@AmitKumar-qh1ts Most of us had jobs, not careers. Not as a feminist, but as a human being, I don't want to stay in a marriage where I'm being disrespected or cheated on. There are various reasons why men and women divorce and these things are not done lightly. I don't think I fit into a lot of Women's liberation philosophies, to me, family is most important, but I do agree with the economic issues such as equal pay, health, and child care issues. The whole concept of breaking off from the family to"find oneself" is foreign to me. There are times I would have preferred to stay home and take care of my children, but economically I could not afford to do so.
This story was strange but also rather sweet at the same time. I loved how she learnt more about herself and enjoyed every minute of it very heart warming. Also makes me want to be a Wedding Photographer or at least professional photographer at the very least. Beautiful story.
Not really. What she needed was to travel and get out of the country, meet and marry a foreigner instead. She’s has little more spirit than how most Japanese in society behave.
It would be caused due to the socioeconomic system persay, not technology. The misuse of technology, maybe, but not technology itself. What will cause the down fall will be the rise of many disorders due to people having children at an older age, because of the monetary-market system is set up to make it harder to settle down earlier. Older men produce ASD (Autism) and other social related disorders and gene mutations, while older women produce down syndrome, and other disabilities and gene mutations. Bottom-line, the selfish actions from the typical developmental people (i.e. normal non-disable people) will be the downfall of our species. All because a group of morons wouldn't dare to face the facts that our current economic system is a failed experiment that needs to be replace with something that benefits human survival as a whole... and not just to live, but to thrive and be able to transfer genes to the next generation more efficiently.
Has more tl do withnthe global economic situation. Work hours are increasing but actual wealth per person is decreasing. Since finances are so important to women, their options are dwindling down and in response men are pulling back from courtship since time is less and its getting harder to impress.
Japanese people probably work more than us and any free time they have, and I can see how they'd rather spend it first on themselves than with other people. It's the work culture and high standard of living that's ruining it I think, but also perhaps technology as well
I work over 90 hours a week. I understand Japanese womans struggle with finding friends and partners. Its extremely difficult and lonely. But you must make discoveries about yourself.
Birgit Cangonja I think it could be deemed selfish if people want a partner and that type of freedom. How would they ever be able to compromise over important joint decisions? It’s not selfish to want freedom but one would get the most out of that freedom if the person remains partner less and celibate. The freedom from having to be concerned when, with whom and where the next lustful session will materialise from. That is liberating.
A lot of really negative, judgemental comments, we don't even know this lady or her life really.I agree and research has found that the key to joy and health is connection with others. She obviously wants it but you can't blame her for not having found it. There's no worse feeling than lying in bed next to your partner and feeling completly alone, plenty of people are married with children and miserable.. I don't think there's a simple answer/solution. Human beings are very complex.
I hope she is happy and responsible for her personal choices and then do not blame the men and do not ask the Daddy State to take care of her with the taxpayers' money through the Social Welfare.
she paid 2,300 euros for her own "self wedding" from her own pocket... she is self sufficient earning her keep with a little extra to spend on her whims.. better this than being stuck with a deadbeat husband who will rip her off from alimony after divorce
Haruna is s perfect example of Japanese people not loving themselves enough, we all need to love ourselves before we can truely find love and happiness.
On the one hand, it’s comforting to know that there are other groups of women in the world going through the same thing the black women in America are going through. On the other hand, it’s really sad to see that love is dying in certain parts of the world and for certain groups of people.
Can we just skip to the part where people just love each other? All these comments are either blaming women or blaming men. Let's just stop blaming and fix it. Love for everyone :)
I've been all over the world and noticed that societies and countries that are high ranked in income and wealth tend to have the loneliest people. Just like that one Japanese man said that they didn't want to bother with marriage because they wanted to do stuff and not sacrifice personal freedom; that's called you don't want to be in a relationship, because the moment you're in one, especially marriage, it's two, not one. Countries like in South America don't really have this problem because people live simpler lives and are just more simple minded, so they are more family oriented and family focused. Sadly Korea is going the way of Japan very slowly and that's not a good sign.
You're totally correct. .. Spent a year in South Corea, few times in Japan and Singapore. .. Unless they're drinking and getting drunk they behave like cement columns. .. Actually this leaves great opportunity finding one of these ladies ( left over brides ) since the guys don't have any romance game, young guy's spending their life away smoking in the Pachinko game parlors. .
So they just work and play game consoles and not interested in sex or short term relationships?
8 ปีที่แล้ว +8
Cost in living in Japan is high... so no.. for one to be successful in life there, one must have a huge salary. In poor countries.. all they have to do is work for the more prosperous country and the money they receive worth more because their cost of living is low. Therefore they can buy more goods and services and more happier.
What you said it was just depressing, on the other hand, that's one of the reasons why couples are not longer working, because, these days a person only likes to focus on oneself and its own wishes.
Ganmu I don’t think so. The value of emotional independence & putting your own needs first is essential in any healthy relationship. You cannot learn to love someone else if you can’t love, respect and value yourself. Relationships no longer work because people are emotionally immature, lack higher values from themselves/are lying to themselves that they are good people, or have been hurt too badly to try again. You don’t go into a relationship to feel like their significant other completes them. You are 100%, your significant other is 100%, and when you’re together it’s a 200% kind of magic. That’s healthy.
Erebos A honeymoon is the romantic vacation you take after a wedding. But however you want to define the concept, I wouldn’t condemn people who never find love to never being able to experience a honeymoon just for the sake of being conceptually correct. 🤷🏻♀️ Compassion first. I bet half of the people who watched this video are judging the woman for doing what she did. It’s funny how we form opinions about how other people should live their lives. I really hate that about humanity. Not all opinions are valuable.
You know what I realize after watching these? Ordinary is amazing. The ordinary life of having a stable job, with a family of your own, a comfortable house, and friends to spend time with. Wouldn't that be so beautiful?
3:06 You know, it's really interesting what this woman says because less than a minute earlier in the footage we see a young guy _completely contradicting her_ in every way. The men all appear very polite and civilized; the young fella explains _exactly_ why men aren't really looking for relationships in a very down-to-Earth manner. It makes you wonder if anybody showed Haruna this footage at any stage during the researching of this piece or if maybe she's watched it afterwards.
I really wanna hug her (not in a creepy way) but because I could relate, and what her friend told her really hit me hard, the; "it should feel natural like air because if not. it's not gonna last." Haruna is such a nice name and seeing a woman with this much sadness breaks my heart in a way. she smiles every now and then but i can feel that there is real sadness in her heart.
Alone time is the best quality time. Being alone shouldn’t lead to loneliness. Many women think that a wedding dress is the best thing about marriage. That might be true. In such crazy unpredictable world children pay the price wether an unhealthy marriage survives or breaks. Many beautiful women are desperate about finding the right men, only to later immerse their hearts in disappointment, grief and loss. We own our lives and our happiness. Why give them to someone else to mess around with them? Falling in love with oneself isn’t selfish. Getting to know ourselves better and better everyday and update ourselves of what we’re becoming is so liberating and enlightening. We owe ourselves happiness and joy. Once we stop looking for them outside, we start becoming more desired and appreciated by others.
A stranger named Aymara Dating is all about women. Asking her out, taking her out, paying for everything and so on. All a woman has to do its turn up and she can mock him and criticise him to everyone afterwards without ever once being judged. The dating scene is a one-sided in experience all situations. Like valentines day and weddings it is all about her so women create the dating scene whatever's that is and men are foolish enough to play along.
There was a time when she rejected nice guys and guys frowned upon her but she keep rejecting her. But after 30 her beauty fade way and the nice guys ignored her. It's her own fault.
It looks like Haruna is very happy for wearing a wedding dress and taking beautiful pictures and I think she is having fun 😍 That was an amazing video❤ , I liked it , thanks very much DW team🙋♀️ ,Japan is a Wonder land 🎎
I think this is awesome! She just wanted to do something that made her feel good about herself and to feel beautiful. If someone wants to dress up and have a day to wear a beautiful dress and make up and have pictures as memories I don’t see that as self centered at all. She’s making her own happiness and not depending on anyone else to do it for her. I love it! 😊👍
I think this is happening because society has made weddings kind of a rite of passage that people feel like they must go through at a certain age. Society tell little girls that they will get married and be a bride someday. The emphasis is usually a lot more on the wedding than on the marriage relationship itself.
I think some people want to experience a wedding and don’t necessarily want the burden of marriage. It’s a great way to make your dream happen and not deal with the man.
It's just a photo shoot of the woman in a wedding dress. She has her divorced sister and niece/nephew and parents for company. She figures she will never marry, so she's getting a photo of herself to hang on the wall. Then she can go on with her life and focus on other things.
I'm not sure if it's being a workaholic rather it's the work culture of the nation to needlessly take too much time out of their people. Lack of good jobs and low pay for how much work is put in.
I can’t imagine doing all of that (especially the dating website) to meet someone. Maybe it’s just me but ALL of the men I found extremely attractive I just happened to meet when I wasn’t even looking (it taught me to always keep enjoying life and eventually I’ll meet the right one).
I usually bump into a few at conventions. Who pays for dating sites? Pay a weekly pass at Supercon and bump into many cute guys with similar interests. I have yet to find one that doesn't want kids.
I knew as a small child I never wanted to marry. I've never seen a happily married couple but even if I knew some it wouldn't change my views. I'm in my forties and love being single. I don't date, I don't care at all for relationships. I would consider throwing some kind of singleness party for my female friends and myself, dressing up, taking pictures and having fun, though I wouldn't consider it marriage for myself. Marriage and children just isn't a vital part of life for many people, and I'm one of them.
I share some of the same. I'd like a life partner, but not through the scam of marriage, and god forbid... children. Everyone around me makes dating and relationships look like bad ideas, so I never bothered to pursuit it personally. I've almost come to terms that I'm probably ok with being single, but I feel like I'm missing something if opt out. I'm way too terrified to find out anyway, so I'll remain scared and timid and single forever. At least I have all this time to do cool stuff.... alone.
Weddings are more about the self centered woman fantasy than the actual marriage. The dress, the cake, the centrality of a romantic party in which she is the center, It’s a beautiful fantasy. It’s alright to have it.
The thing is: sometimes you get so used to being single (for a long time), the thought of another person living with you and be by your side and sharing life together can get really intimidating and unusual --> like wedon't even have place for another person in our life, because we established being living on our own, which is kinda sad :')
I am single, 45 year old woman. Watching this I feel sad too. I am not pretty enough to ever have a husband so I kind of always knew I wouldn't get married. So I reconciled my self to that a while ago. However she is pretty and that is why I feel sad. She always figured she would get Married. So she has not had the time I have had to reconcile with that reality. On the other hand this show gave me an idea, not for a solo marriage. But to treat myself every year to a satisfying experience that we can look back on. I think that is what the solo marriage is all about. I think I am going to treat my self to an interesting travel adventure every year. I always thought it was sad yo take photos as I was by my self in them , but now I realize the necessity of it . I want to be able to say , even if it is just to my self, you did that. That is you in Hawaii, that is you in Paris etc. I think this is something, women, married or single should do.
![ว้าว!ลุงบีมแบกทองมารับขวัญหลานกันยกบ้าน [cc] แดนแพทตี้ SS2 | EP.49 |](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Osihq1OAs-4/mqdefault.jpg)
I've been married to myself for 17 years. I want a divorce.
WHatsaap me on +256776958522 fred
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hehehe... I have filed too...
Married 19 years to myself but I can't afford a divorce. 😭😢😭
lmao i'm going to bed after this comment but thanks i needed a laugh after my day.
The Japanese have a disturbing habit of laughing while in extremely depressing situations.
It’s called cultural differences, they laugh when they are embarrassed.
Kitty Nakamoto that’s what the guy said lol u jsut said the same with extra steps
lmao this made me cry from laughter i always laugh in depressing situations and people find it really strange. its so you cant cry from how depressing they are it makes it almost comical in a way to not face the depressing reality.
I'm an American and I'll do this
@@kittynakamoto2449 its not even a cultural difference lots of people do it all over the world its called nervous laughter. when my last gf broke up with me all i could do is laugh. she got really, REALLY mad.
Next big trend in Japan: alive funerals
😂
already a thing in China. people pay to lie in coffins to experience what it's like
Well few Corona patients were burnt alive by CCP
Highland Laird they already done it
😂🤣
"Being Alone is Not The Same As Being Lonely"
Perhaps, but we wouldn't be talking about this if it wasn't lonely.
yeah ,lets make happy together
Agree
exactly
Being in a relationship is stressful I would rather marry a fictional character in my favorite movie/book.
This country needs some serious work-life balance. How can you do anything (like raising a family) if you work 70 hours a week?
Well, my thoughts through all this are, if things aren't changing, what's preventing it from doing so? And who are the people benefiting from it?
im working here in japan its so stressful coz im working 68hrs a week
D. Matz. I can’t imagine i feel exhausted with 30 , but 70 😣
Raise a family? Many people would be too tired to even have sex.
They don’t want to raise a family at all
That just sounds like being single with extra steps.
Ahaha nicee..
😂😂😂 That's sounds like something a morty will say
Hahah that’s exactly what it is. 😂
@Hanze Brix nice way of putting it lol
😂😂😂
people can't deal with reality anymore.
I am physically delusional
I see what you’re saying but in her situation it’s not a she can’t deal with it. She just wanted that moment
wrong. people have never been able to deal with reality. we always fear what we can't control, what we don't understand or simply what we just think we don't like. this behavior is deeply rooted in humanity as a whole, and what we're seeing is just a manifestation of that due to the over-abundance of people, resources, progress of technology, etc., because reality is becoming easier to ignore every day.
@@nicewater894 i'm fartedly pooplusional
luvsdecor But your concept of reality is based on social constructs, which are just man-made things in an attempt to put order and routine into daily life. Your reality isn’t any more real than the people in the video’s reality.
There's something deeply sad about this though. Like a reflection on a lake, distorted by the ripples, of a society that's lost its way and will soon be gone.
In spite of the up-beat tone of the film, I find it troubling too. Just another way of exploiting those who have been made to feel alienated by the modern world. I hope this lady finds something better in the future.
@@27b4 Yes 'alienated by the modern world' where our God has become money and success describes a multitude of people doesn't it.
@@ronmortimer252- Success nowadays seems to amount to little more than getting noticed, and look where that's leading so many young people.
Such poetic words for a deeply sad phenomenon.
@@ronmortimer252 bruh money has always been our god. Our society is nothing different from ancient society thousands of yours ago in that sense
"For her this is more important than marriage itself"
That's all you need to know. She doesn't actually care about marriage. What she wants is a wedding and those two things are not the same. She wants the dress and the pictures and the and all the material aspects of it, not the lifelong commitment.
Anon Amos the more they become secular the more they care only about material things and themselves.
I think just every Woman want to be a Princess at least for a Day.
The princess thing has gotten way out of hand. There was a really good book written a few years ago now called “The Narcessism Epedemic: Living in the Age of Narcessism" which had a whole chapter on this one subject！That said, she has been honest aand has not used anybody in the process, which I do respect in one way, although it seems fairly rediculous. This could just as easily have been done as cultural satire!
Anon Amos haha rediculous
I hear some people say that the concept of marrying bcuz of "love" is a new "western' idea!! In ancient time people married each other in order to carry the family name and having kids so that that kids can take care of the parents when they get older.so I see nothing wrong with a woman marrying a husband bcuz of "money"!!
paying $ for a boost in self esteem. Japanese business people are geniuses!
US Fastfood companies are making people pay $$$ to get poisoned by their food. Which is more genius?
Continuous Self-Improvement They have junk food and fast food in Japan...
The self-help/coaching industry makes tons of money every year by masturbating people's egos and their unrealistic expectations all over the world. This is nothing new...
Actually, if you paid attention, the only women doing this are high in self esteem. The women who are depressed about being single aren't throwing these parties.
I agree.
This just looks like Japan’s wedding dress industry’s desperately trying to stay alive XD
"Let me celebrate my loneliness"
@David Walker lmao, stop roasting people in the comments 😂.
🎂
@David Walker 😂😂😂😂😭😭
@David Walker so mean 💀
ancestor's souls are weeping seeing their descendants like this.
They should have done better.
Rocketbearful Those samurais harakiri'd themselves for nothing.
@@TellingItLikeItIs2000 strong men make good times, good times make weak men. weak men make hard times... hard times make strong men..
@@Rocketbearful nice wording 👍
@@Rocketbearful How original.
I love how when women finally discover they can be happy without being married, they are immediately labelled as "lonely".
it's bitter men who think of them that way. Their fragile masculine egos don't like the idea that women finally realize they are redundant
indrinita true
Angel McGovern I found the bitter female with a fragile feminine ego realising she's the one who is redundant. Such toxic femininity.
oh boohoo, it applies to both gender mate
Angel McGovern its not a about men, its all about die alone, thats the problem...
Japanese men are hardcore MGTOW (Herbivore), these men ignore women to the point where women marry themselves! damn!
because women are career obsessed, no man wants a career woman and no woman wants to be a housewife today. so its not all mgtows fault, it's globalisation
@@silverman824 💯
@@silverman824 Indeed.But it can if both want to tolerate.
Men married doll too because women be ignoring him.
In a sense, the women are the ones rejecting relationships even more (not surprising since they have the most social pressure). Ppl complain that men in Japan do not seek sexual partners, but women are even less likely to.
I don’t like the English voiceover when they are speaking Japanese. I rather hear them and use subtitles.
Maybe this intended for any blind people so they can at least hear the audio
why
I'm used to it. I watched a lot of Japanese monster movies. The dubbing was awful.
Then you would have to learn to read.
Your Precious Trash ooouu I didn’t think of that. Very interesting.
she's not bitter. she seems sweet... that's good!
I think it's a facade.
Sherren Pulcher says:
"she's not bitter. she seems sweet... that's good!"
==
Not yet, you mean?
lol
Sherren Pulcher the work culture is to blame for the death of families in Japan
qjtvaddict :
"Sherren Pulcher the work culture is to blame for the death of families in Japan"
==
Young people not getting marred is a worldwide trend.
So is low fertility rate, at least in the developed countries Japan or not Japan.
Only men can be bitter. Women are queen
Sad that materialism and too many extensively long hours of work throw them off balance and culture destroyed.
Thank you for not adding into the useless sexist rants in this comment section. You really get it. ^_^ This is a socioeconomic problem of hyperconsumerism, hypermaterialism and over exaggeration of a failed economic system that doesn't benefit human survival.
Something changed and it wasn’t just men . They reacted to what women wanted. See what most modern women don’t get is after 25 there looks are starting to decline. All those years spent studying and getting a job and ignoring the fact that men are interested in them but failed to acknowledge this because of study and work means that men waited around far to long to become interested in relationships . They found other things to do. If you couple this with fact women after 25 and beyond are now desperate to have children. It doesn’t feel to men your getting married for love . But to be a sperm Donner and a cash machine that could be divorced at any time if she so chooses. Marriage is far to late these days for men to be interested . I know this not just women’s fault but society in general has changed .
Dorethea Simone nope!!! Thanks to feminism Japanese man prefer rubber dolls instead of real women..... and I agree ....MGTOW HARD CORE LOL ...!
yea and then you have those countries that are needlessly overpopulating...
@@becomingdauntless8821 welp even if they are overpopuating they are doing it with their own resources, did they beg to other countries? no. people have their own choices if they chose to reproduce its their right. i am amused how a person from another country gives lecture and opinions about countries that have nothing to do with them or their country. We should RESPECT everyone choices just like they respect ours.
She smiling, but when she alone in her room, she is crying.
U r agood mentalist !
🤣🤣🤣
I just love broken english
Me Tarzan you Jane
Signs of a dying civilization.
@@niriribururur7074 what? kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk,my godness.
Not every is fortunate enough to find love. What she did reminds me of kids who go to their prom even though they did not have a date but have a good time anyway. The events are milestones and people can still experience the joy by going through the ceremony. This lady valued herself enough to make the effort and now may be resigned to the fact she may never find a mate. Here in the US, what she did is called a commitment ceremony.
FurKids OnBoard I cannot find anything admirable in her fruitless attempt to live a fantasy. A more fruitful way might be working on her attitude (men can’t handle confident women) and improve on building meaningful relationships rather than chasing a pointless dream. Start by making herself beautiful inside, I am certain it will only increase her chances to meet a man who loves her for being herself. If she still cannot find a mate, at least she will make true friends rather than keep going to singles events and fortune tellers. What is there to admire for this fruitless, lonely existence?
@@solecurious1448 I totally agree with you about that. She paid money for an illusion and a fairytale.
Marriage and love are not the same
I bet she rejected some nice man
What's wrong with hikikomori? Lol
The Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race.
Mr. Ted K.? Are you here?
The wheel should have never been invented..
Look at the pain in her eyes
If you marry yourself and later on marry someone else, can you be charged with bigamy?
PlasmaMongoose
Does marrying your own ego count?
What if the bride suffers from schizo effective disorder?
You could, if you have multiple personalities; but at least you'd get more tax deductions, since you can claim your "selves" as dependents.
Well bigamy is two women, so unless you're a lesbian, I would say no, not technically
Self marriage isn't legally binding, so, no.
You're lucky to have had 1 love in your lifetime. I have been lucky to have found love. We were 3 weeks away from getting married. She flew to the Philippines to bring her grandmother back for the wedding. Her plane crashed on the way there. She was pregnant with the son I never had! That's the last time I was in love. Love is worth fighting for!
Im sorry to hear that.
constipated in sin city Îm so sorry for your losses. I wish you the best
Damn.... A pretty dramatic end. It's terrible.
😢
What flight?
I have a feeling this will become more and more common place, not only in Japan but in other countires (as it is here in the states from the reports I've read)
I was seriously thinking about doing this for myself.. Sick of the toxic nature of.. Waiting... On some level no matter how happy I am I feel I deserve love and every once in a while I wonder if its ever going to happen.. Its not even sad it's just annoying.. Marrying your self seems like a great way to put that needy part to bed once and for all.. I fully support it
@@kkibela If it's merely an annoyance or like you said "neediness", then no, you are not experiencing deficiency in love. What you are experiencing is absence of some marker that symbolizes the rite of formation of a committed couple - but not the deep love bond aspect of a couple's relationship.
@@kkibela j
@@simplehealthyliving4681 lol please don't.. Its so reductive...
@@kkibela I'm saying minor annoyance/"neediness" is a trivial thing. The wedding ceremony in itself as merely a marker is a trivial thing.
If you are experiencing serious deficiency in love, that's a serious thing. The wedding ceremony symbolizing the beginning of a lifetime of love and fulfillment is not a trivial thing.
I'm not minimizing your pain, if pain is what you are really feeling.
Also, you don't need to edit your post - to convey sarcasm. Resorting to sarcasm is very immature when we are talking about serious things like loveless living which will become the norm as the world becomes more and more materialistic.
All a person can do is feel happy seeing the small, beautiful things in life that still exist.
In Japan as in the USA and probably most other places, the wedding itself is fetishized. Little girls are thought to dream about their wedding day. It is the wedding day that they are dreaming of, not the day to day reality of having some guy in your life all the time. Boys are not taught to dream of wedding days. It is a cliche that while young boys were looking at Playboy, young girls are looking at bridal magazines. But cliches have some truth to them.
one of the only people here who has common sense.
in the old days, the long-term success of marriage was more important than the wedding itself.
then the de beers diamond company came along in the late 19nth century with the big lie that you need a ring to make a marriage.
then marriages got more and more expensive, because women were taught to believe that the symbolism was more important than the reality.
Exactly!
Really? I was looking into gaming and Sesame Street magazines as a little girl. I dreamt of a Paleontologist and having a pet Brachiosaurus, never once wanting to be a bride. Sorry I wasn't the girly-girl. My teen years were different, but still no bridal dreams, just wet dreams.
BTW, in Japan the boys looked into Hentai the most, not Playboy. Is Playbboy even a thing now-a-days? Here in the US, kids today (boys and girls) go straight into the hardcore sites. The terms and ideas little 8 year olds know these days is alarming. O_O Sometimes I feel like a virgin the way these kids talk. Oh my!
More idolised than fetishized.
The concept that if a woman doesn't have a wedding in her life she's a failure.
The dream is still being sold heavily to little girls.
It's a remnant of US culture from the 50's that is still going strong, it comes from a time when girls were being prepped for marriage (and little else) all through their teens.
If they were sent to college it was usually to find a husband.
I'm so against marriage I would leave myself at the alter
That's kinda deep in a dumb way
🤣
Hahahhahaha!
@@Joeyblondewolf2 Why hello
I'm so against marriage that I'd rather die first before something like this happened to me.
For those who are taking a dump on marriage and relationships in the comment section , out if bitterness , you are missing the point . Finding someone is more than just finding financial or sexual stability .It's more than the illusion of "love" . It's all about finding someone who shares life with you , the good , the bad and the ugly . It's not about escaping being alone but rather being lonely .And that's what makes this video even sadder .
Gaingster Kidd yes, and that experience is not for everyone
well said
Why should one need a woman to escape being lonely? People don't realize that there's many people out there already that care about them, including their friends and family. It's because of this that I know I'm well valued and that I don't need validity of my own existence through a relationship.
@@micaholson1052 No one said you need validity of your own existence through a relationship. That isn't why most people have relationships or marriage. Most people just end up in a relationship and getting married because they fall in love for real. Once you truly are in love, it's almost impossible to resist being with that person and usually wanting marriage. It just happens to you. You aren't trying to validate your existence or some other silly idea.
@@johnroberts1616 Love is really nothing more than a chemical reaction in your brain. You may disagree, but the concept of love is really nothing more than a man made one. Same as marriage.
Those who are single want to be married, those who are married want to get the hell out of dodge.
Ck KO Perfect comment. So really, we should just be happy with our lives regardless of the present moment
Jupiter Stars This 😏
Welcome to what's called life
Hahaha:-) true
Marriage is a funeral with a cake. It is where men go to die.
She seems really picky when she talked about that singles party.
Well, she shouldn't be with anybody, but somebody that she feels comfortable with. She said that the guys weren't prepared to commit.
@@paolagrando5079 yeah,no one isnt enough for her,tipical modern woman.
@@vagrant5970 You can always look in the older generation.
@@paolagrando5079 But she literally just met these guys. How can she expect people she just met to express interest in commitment to her. She needs to earn it. People should not commit to someone just because it is expected. They should commit when they find someone they want to commit to.
@@Zero-tm5xk We don't know, we weren't there. Maybe they were talking as a general thing. Maybe she got the gist from the way that they were talking about their life or their previous relationships.
I love this part of the Japanese culture. They turn a problem into a charming experience. In a society of shut-ins and high suicide rate, self-love and self-care is beautiful. Good for her.
I feel sad watching this. the most valuable thing in life is love not money. Its hard to get love from this world!
Rek26987 | You need money to get love, fool.
Love is just a sugar coating word we use for hiding the elephant in the room. The fact that men and women both mutually have ulterior motives for getting involved with each other in the first place. If they both admit their ulterior motives, it is called prostitution. If they both hide their ulterior motives and call it love, it is romance.
That's the no-true-Scottsman fallacy.
Women marry for financial security. Men marry for the illusion of sexual security.
I think that Asians get bored of looking at other Asians in Japan, and they just want newness or novelty. They want something that they can't find in the continent bounded by Europe and the Arctic, Pacific, and Indian oceans. They want either a black man or white man.
good for her. I would never judge her. I think it's great she is happy with her decision.
anny Japan needs Jesus Christ.
Joseph Smith don’t you know they have Christian church don’t be ignorant and Jesus is going to what get her pregnant don’t joke.
She may seem happy, it does not mean she really is....the fact that she got to marry herself cannot come out of happiness and cannot be happiness either....
She's pathetic!)
@@josephsmith728 its not your concern respect their culture
Fascinating how the choice of a single person about her life gets so many people upset.
It’s an indication Paola; people are so far up their own backsides that they can’t process how ridiculous their own behaviour is. If any young woman wanted to marry: she’d be married. If she was interested in being a good partner she would do that too. It’s not hard for a woman to find a man and have a satisfying life. But that’s not what they want. They want to be insane and they want us to accept that.
@@JayJordanJuly bro, here’s your W.
@@jamesmir89 I don’t understand? What does that mean?
@@JayJordanJuly your W, your win
@@jamesmir89 Uhhh thanks?
Social skills have declined worldwide because everyone is on Facebook, the internet, texting, but less meeting in person and making real, physical connections.
I agree. All of the latter you listed is so impersonal and so disattached to the real world and real people. We live our lives more separate than together which is really tragic considering that we need impartial love more than ever before. Back in the twentieth century, when technology didn't dominate all aspects of life, there was more social interaction and love. The twenty-first century tech-filled world transformed human beings into cold unloving machines who only interact when connected online. So so sad.😢
I agree. All of the latter you listed is so impersonal and so disattached to the real world and real people. We live our lives more separate than together which is really tragic considering that we need impartial love more than ever before. Back in the twentieth century, when technology didn't dominate all aspects of life, there was more social interaction and love. The twenty-first century tech-filled world transformed human beings into cold unloving machines who only interact when connected online. So so sad.😢
@Crim Sin Older people including baby boomers use social media heavily, too, the biggest being Facebook. Interacting at work is transactional, you have to do it, thats not voluntary socialization. But, when people of all ages get home, they now have many online choices for their time that did not exist 30 years ago. A higher % of people are single now, a lower % date and have sex. Less people paint, play instruments now....it's just too easy to go online and stay in that safe, addicting world.
@Crim Sin There again, they are people like you and me who DO still get out and meet people, do things 😀
Maybe next people will start marrying their gadgets since it is the only thing they need and trust nowdays
That woman has mastered the TREAT YO SELF philosophy.
It's too bad this channel has titled this video "lonely women" or wrote that she married herself because it's really not the case. At no point she's saying that she's marrying herself. She's merely enjoying a fun activity that may also reconciled herself with her dream and what she wished to be.
So many comments didn't understand that and are using that as a tool to spit on feminism or western culture. I think they simply didn't watch the video and just read the title/description.
What Haruna and other women did isn't that far from people cosplaying or putting on an Oiran kimono...
They would rather blame feminism than toxic masculinity and capitalism for making these men into dudes selfish macho men they don't want to marry.
@@leotardbanshee
Truth!
Toxic men love to piss on Feminism, but it's because of Toxic Masculinity and the Patriarchy why Feminism exists and is still relevant to this day.
Annie Ranai no I think YOU are the one missing the point but whatever you want to think.
I think they wanted an eye catching title so they slightly exaggerated. Try not to read too much into it. I see your point though.
whats so nice about marrying yourself...I mean, when you are born you are already married to yourself anyway because you have to live with yourself.
The title is misleading. Even the wedding planner says being alone is not necessarily the same as being lonely. This woman is enjoying her life, and part of that enjoyment was buying a wedding package for herself. I love it!
No, its the same.
But the main component in a wedding ceremony is missing: a partner. This really is sad.
@Kuuryo yeah I agree seriously you're supposed to have a partner in marriage. And doing it alone and trying to experience it but the groom is missing is kinda pointless it's almost like she wants to escape reality and her problems that she would just plan a wedding but shes alone, its pretty sad.
@@biplav32 Haha it is funny you insisted she is lonely when you have never interacted with her 😆 I am extrovert person, and somehow I can say that I can easily connect with others, but after years of self reflection of finding what makes me more at peace and content, I find the answer in spending more time with myself. You dont really need other people to make you happy, at the end of the day--happiness is a choice. You can find happiness in every small things, learning new things on your own, I mean, there lot of happiness you can find in building a good relationship with yourself. I feel more at peace and calm and happier being by myself. But dont get me wrong, I still hang out with my friends so I can tell the difference of happiness I find by enjoying myself alone or with other. I think the difference is the happiness you find by spending time with others is sort of "temporary" and "fragile", but the happiness you can find by being yourself is sort of "long term" and "genuine". In short, I think, it is naive to think people who are alone are lonely, you would not know they are more happier than those with partners.
@@hiimain7932 tldr
I just found this heartbreaking.
I married my wife together since my age 20 and my wife 19 by also doing college. In Indonesia, going marry is easy u know. Our life is very good nowadays
I must have a Japanese mentality then, I couldn't even imagine getting married at my current age of 24, Let alone at 20 yrs old, Heck not even at 29yrs old max I guess.
Where your from they encourage marriage, in the U.S they tell you to wait till you're 30.
alhamdulillah selamat !! 😍
Happy for you.
@Sweetbutter Cupcakes it will be offset by the none you will have.
People are going nuts.
Alejandro Morales people are already nuts!
Is it just me..or is it getting crazy out there?
@@suhailinayatulla652 well, connected world shows us too many problems.
Not so literrally,she is nice when not married,but after married ,her teeth gonna longger than that
Simple...but so true. And funny.
*puts a ring on my own finger * "Oh, you saucy thang. Tonight...YOU..." ^~^
She is putting herself out there and hasn’t found what she’s looking for, so she is doing something for herself, I just hope she took a nice vacation after!
this anime sucks, where are the subtitles
I’d marry myself but then the likelihood of divorce would be really high! 😂 ♥️🤭
Margo A. C. MAC of course because you are a women.
Women are grown up children.
I know you're joking, but it still says something about how you seem to see yourself subconsciously...
@@MojiMikato ok sadman
Yes, so sad. Divorced, but you still having to live with yourself. Looking in the mirror, pleading, "Why don't you love me, anymore?", receiving only stares and silence.
Hi beautiful 🌷🌷🌷🌷
that's interesting..."we want our independence"....hence no need for companionship.
I don't think you really get what independence they're talking about. Most men are pretty independent but they still get married? I think independent means if you didn't have a husband or wife, it wouldn't stop you from living. Not that if you're independent, you no longer are able to find a relationship. I know this comment is a bit late but I just wanted you to understand the misconception
@@madlKmT 100% thank you
Your company is the besssssst company you have. No one takes advantage of you and you do not take advantage of others.
@@aviweskiti8031 0% no thanks
@Scott Sullivan Than change the economic system so that problem wouldn't happen. Most men don't want to settle down till they are over 40 years old.... oh but women have to deal with saggy nasty old man balls filled with deteriorated ASD sperm right? Hypocrite much?
Am I speaking to the man or the woman of the house?
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Yes.
Marrying yourself is the epitome of loneliness.
Solo wedding: US$2,010.
And people ask me how I can afford to travel.
Good for her. She has worked long and hard. She deserves to experience one if her dreams. There wouldn't be a controversy if she decided to blow her money on a vacation. This is her dream not ours.
Grace Young but this isn’t her dream she’s just doing it because she’s gettin old and thinks this is experiencing marriage. She dreams of having a man ask her to marry him
It's absolutely tragic. This is not a dream, it's a nightmare.
Grace Young
Exactly! Stop bashing her.
Antgotguap
How you know? Could this b ur interpretation?
This is comedic gold.
More like tragedy lol
If she finds a husband she'll have to divorce herself first
You know, the bridal agent should just pack a model groom to complete the wedding pictures lol like why not? Maybe charge a bit more for the optional groom prop lol since it’s just taking pictures and a pseudo wedding
Considering you can hire "sisters" and "friends" in Japan, I'm surprised that isn't an option.
And then you can pay a little extra later to have yourself photo-shopped into the groom's positions in the photos.
As a woman in her 60's with two kids and a 27 year marriage, I have to disagree with almost all the comments here. Marriage and a family done correctly is a great benefit to both men and women, not to mention the children. I grew up in the age of "Women's Lib" - it was drummed into me that getting a high paying career was going to be the ultimate achievement so I waited almost too long to get married. I went to graduate school, had a well paying career and enjoyed every moment of it, but when I got married and had kids I gladly gave it up to become a full-time homemaker and stay-at-home mom. This was entirely my choice, as my husband said he would support my decision either way. I knew I could always go back to work, but my kids were not going to be little forever; being there for them was far more important. Being a good wife and mother was the most challenging job of my life but also the most gratifying. Not boring at all! I don't think that my career alone would have been enough - just ask the successful executive women who are unmarried in their 40's, 50's, and 60's. Older unattached women often end up as the crazy cat ladies. There are only so many girl's nights out, carefree trips, and designer handbags before women tire of all of it and start to want to nurture.
The greatest gift you can give your kids is a stable family life, knowing who mom and dad are and that they are committed to each other. I am so grateful to my competent husband who has financially supported all of us. In return, I took care of the kids, the house, made home cooked meals every day and provided regular physical intimacy. I also continue to take good care of myself, by dressing up and making up, working out, eating well, getting my hair and nails done, etc. in order to be attractive to my husband. The 1950's traditional marriage is not right for everyone, but for us it's worked out spectacularly well. This was shocking to me because I had been brainwashed in college to think that this lifestyle was a horrible fate for women!
Now, what happens to the single guys? If they are attractive and have game, they will eventually tire of one-night stands and meaningless sex; they also become lonely sad people with not much purpose to life. Without a wife, many single guys let their health deteriorate, overindulge in "fun" activities such as gambling, drugs, alcohol and porn until they end up dead of a sudden heart attack in their 50's. For both men and women, living for just yourself can become empty and boring. The moment I became a mom, I wanted to continually improve myself so I can be the best example for my kids.
Single men and women - quit looking for Prince and Princess Charming and look for someone good enough.
Little Mom Pasadena
I'm a 60 year old single man, and I approve this message
You knowingly or unknowingly understood the meaning and purpose of marriage. The world has forgotten however what is the function of marriage. In your case, you let it perform its function and everybody in your family and most of all your children benefited from it. The reason why world is forgetting the function of marriage is the same propagandize that you also faced during your younger days, which is driven by the quest for Equality and Marxism in my observation.
Little mom Pasadena I am so happy for you. Somebody is having a good life. Most of the women I know want to get married to a great guy. Most have been divorced and want try marriage again. It all depends on you and your partner's compatibility .Lucky you. And need to have economic security, as African Americans this is a difficult situation. Once again lucky you!!! We are happy to be mothers. Love our children.
@@khem127 Hi Khem127, when you say most of the women you know have been divorced, wasn't it that only few had been divorced by their spouses, and in fact most of the time, it were those women themselves who divorced their spouses? I have heard that this is the usual case and wanted to check with you. Your another point is that it all depends on you and your partners compatibility. But I think it will also depend on how seriously you take what they tell you in Women's Lib. In case of Little mom Pasadena, she didn't take those things so seriously and gave up her career to become a full time home maker because she saw more value in that. How many women today will see more value in being home maker and be proud of that, as opposed to having a job where they take orders from a boss and work for customers? Which one would be more fulfilling between those two options for most Women? I think Little Mom Pasadena was an exception as she thought being a Home Maker was more fulfilling rather than having a job where she would have taken orders from a boss and worked for customers.
@@AmitKumar-qh1ts Most of us had jobs, not careers. Not as a feminist, but as a human being, I don't want to stay in a marriage where I'm being disrespected or cheated on. There are various reasons why men and women divorce and these things are not done lightly. I don't think I fit into a lot of Women's liberation philosophies, to me, family is most important, but I do agree with the economic issues such as equal pay, health, and child care issues. The whole concept of breaking off from the family to"find oneself" is foreign to me. There are times I would have preferred to stay home and take care of my children, but economically I could not afford to do so.
Imagine a guy showing up on the self wedding.
This story was strange but also rather sweet at the same time. I loved how she learnt more about herself and enjoyed every minute of it very heart warming. Also makes me want to be a Wedding Photographer or at least professional photographer at the very least. Beautiful story.
Not really. What she needed was to travel and get out of the country, meet and marry a foreigner instead. She’s has little more spirit than how most Japanese in society behave.
This is about to be America very soon, and probably all over the world thanks to technology and poor communication skills as a result.
It would be caused due to the socioeconomic system persay, not technology. The misuse of technology, maybe, but not technology itself. What will cause the down fall will be the rise of many disorders due to people having children at an older age, because of the monetary-market system is set up to make it harder to settle down earlier. Older men produce ASD (Autism) and other social related disorders and gene mutations, while older women produce down syndrome, and other disabilities and gene mutations. Bottom-line, the selfish actions from the typical developmental people (i.e. normal non-disable people) will be the downfall of our species. All because a group of morons wouldn't dare to face the facts that our current economic system is a failed experiment that needs to be replace with something that benefits human survival as a whole... and not just to live, but to thrive and be able to transfer genes to the next generation more efficiently.
Juci Shockwave Enjoy watching it all crumble.
Live in your own plastic bubble,,,on ly yourself as company,,,,, watching ppl do ordinary things online ,,cos you don't hang out with real people
true
Has more tl do withnthe global economic situation. Work hours are increasing but actual wealth per person is decreasing. Since finances are so important to women, their options are dwindling down and in response men are pulling back from courtship since time is less and its getting harder to impress.
Japanese people probably work more than us and any free time they have, and I can see how they'd rather spend it first on themselves than with other people. It's the work culture and high standard of living that's ruining it I think, but also perhaps technology as well
I work over 90 hours a week. I understand Japanese womans struggle with finding friends and partners. Its extremely difficult and lonely. But you must make discoveries about yourself.
I have been taking solo honeymoon(vacation) around the world in the last 10 years and loving it, no commitment needed :)
Good for you. I really love to hear you say "no commitment needed" when you're 60yrs old and have cancer.
2:23 there you have your answer,,,, they just don’t want to lose their freedom
Selfishness
Birgit Cangonja
I think it could be deemed selfish if people want a partner and that type of freedom. How would they ever be able to compromise over important joint decisions?
It’s not selfish to want freedom but one would get the most out of that freedom if the person remains partner less and celibate. The freedom from having to be concerned when, with whom and where the next lustful session will materialise from. That is liberating.
A lot of really negative, judgemental comments, we don't even know this lady or her life really.I agree and research has found that the key to joy and health is connection with others. She obviously wants it but you can't blame her for not having found it. There's no worse feeling than lying in bed next to your partner and feeling completly alone, plenty of people are married with children and miserable.. I don't think there's a simple answer/solution. Human beings are very complex.
I hope she is happy and responsible for her personal choices and then do not blame the men and do not ask the Daddy State to take care of her with the taxpayers' money through the Social Welfare.
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she paid 2,300 euros for her own "self wedding" from her own pocket... she is self sufficient earning her keep with a little extra to spend on her whims.. better this than being stuck with a deadbeat husband who will rip her off from alimony after divorce
CJ, you are off topic... must be the barbiturates kicking in..
I'm judging her in silence
Haruna is s perfect example of Japanese people not loving themselves enough, we all need to love ourselves before we can truely find love and happiness.
Kallus Garnet she doesn’t have to she has her carrier,that is All ? By today standards...
On the one hand, it’s comforting to know that there are other groups of women in the world going through the same thing the black women in America are going through. On the other hand, it’s really sad to see that love is dying in certain parts of the world and for certain groups of people.
Japan: Wonder why foreigners find us weird.
Also Japan:
the whole "i wanna be single and independent" line being taken to a whole new level...wow!!!
Can we just skip to the part where people just love each other? All these comments are either blaming women or blaming men. Let's just stop blaming and fix it. Love for everyone :)
Before we can fix or start the healing process we need to know where to shift the blame and whom is responsible for it
Utopia, its not possible.
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Omg, you two are a perfect couple. You're so cute together. :D
@@ulquiorra3104 : Yep. Many don't look in the mirror. Many don't love themselves.
Men don't want to be a ATM Machine anymore.
Hail #Mgtow.
TRUE BRO
You know what, you go girl! It isn't hurting anyone and it gives a self esteem boost!
I've been all over the world and noticed that societies and countries that are high ranked in income and wealth tend to have the loneliest people. Just like that one Japanese man said that they didn't want to bother with marriage because they wanted to do stuff and not sacrifice personal freedom; that's called you don't want to be in a relationship, because the moment you're in one, especially marriage, it's two, not one. Countries like in South America don't really have this problem because people live simpler lives and are just more simple minded, so they are more family oriented and family focused. Sadly Korea is going the way of Japan very slowly and that's not a good sign.
You're totally correct. ..
Spent a year in South Corea, few times in Japan and Singapore. ..
Unless they're drinking and getting drunk they behave like cement columns. ..
Actually this leaves great opportunity finding one of these ladies ( left over brides ) since the guys don't have any romance game, young guy's spending their life away smoking in the Pachinko game parlors. .
Thats why i travel to poor countries ;)
So they just work and play game consoles and not interested in sex or short term relationships?
Cost in living in Japan is high... so no.. for one to be successful in life there, one must have a huge salary. In poor countries.. all they have to do is work for the more prosperous country and the money they receive worth more because their cost of living is low. Therefore they can buy more goods and services and more happier.
That's why they come to work there, then sending money to their home country. .
My Japanese language teacher told me that Japanese women are more particular than American women. That's why I don't have one.
They are too selective.
That's not what manga taught me, though. Each and every romcom starts with: "This is me, average student, with no interesting traits what so ever...".
I think a honeymoon for 1 would be a lot more fun.... like, spa treatments, touristy things, the complete self-care abroad package.
That's just a nice vacation. A honeymoon is for two.
What you said it was just depressing, on the other hand, that's one of the reasons why couples are not longer working, because, these days a person only likes to focus on oneself and its own wishes.
Ganmu I don’t think so. The value of emotional independence & putting your own needs first is essential in any healthy relationship. You cannot learn to love someone else if you can’t love, respect and value yourself. Relationships no longer work because people are emotionally immature, lack higher values from themselves/are lying to themselves that they are good people, or have been hurt too badly to try again. You don’t go into a relationship to feel like their significant other completes them. You are 100%, your significant other is 100%, and when you’re together it’s a 200% kind of magic. That’s healthy.
Erebos A honeymoon is the romantic vacation you take after a wedding. But however you want to define the concept, I wouldn’t condemn people who never find love to never being able to experience a honeymoon just for the sake of being conceptually correct. 🤷🏻♀️ Compassion first. I bet half of the people who watched this video are judging the woman for doing what she did. It’s funny how we form opinions about how other people should live their lives. I really hate that about humanity. Not all opinions are valuable.
You know what I realize after watching these? Ordinary is amazing. The ordinary life of having a stable job, with a family of your own, a comfortable house, and friends to spend time with. Wouldn't that be so beautiful?
No
@@pinkroses9320 what make you said that?
3:06 You know, it's really interesting what this woman says because less than a minute earlier in the footage we see a young guy _completely contradicting her_ in every way. The men all appear very polite and civilized; the young fella explains _exactly_ why men aren't really looking for relationships in a very down-to-Earth manner.
It makes you wonder if anybody showed Haruna this footage at any stage during the researching of this piece or if maybe she's watched it afterwards.
Edward Carnby
Right.?
I feel Haruna can't win. She should travel outside of Japan and endless possibilities b open. I wish her love!
I really wanna hug her (not in a creepy way) but because I could relate, and what her friend told her really hit me hard, the; "it should feel natural like air because if not. it's not gonna last." Haruna is such a nice name and seeing a woman with this much sadness breaks my heart in a way. she smiles every now and then but i can feel that there is real sadness in her heart.
She looked happy and beautiful. I wish they would have shown a few of her pictures, the backgrounds were amazing.
Alone time is the best quality time. Being alone shouldn’t lead to loneliness.
Many women think that a wedding dress is the best thing about marriage. That might be true. In such crazy unpredictable world children pay the price wether an unhealthy marriage survives or breaks.
Many beautiful women are desperate about finding the right men, only to later immerse their hearts in disappointment, grief and loss.
We own our lives and our happiness. Why give them to someone else to mess around with them? Falling in love with oneself isn’t selfish. Getting to know ourselves better and better everyday and update ourselves of what we’re becoming is so liberating and enlightening.
We owe ourselves happiness and joy.
Once we stop looking for them outside, we start becoming more desired and appreciated by others.
I feel like this is a really positive experience but it is a shame that the dating scene in Japan is like that for her.
Women created the dating scene and this is one of the inevitable results.
Gambit771 what do you mean "women created the dating scene" ? I'm actually interested in what you mean by that
A stranger named Aymara Dating is all about women.
Asking her out, taking her out, paying for everything and so on.
All a woman has to do its turn up and she can mock him and criticise him to everyone afterwards without ever once being judged.
The dating scene is a one-sided in experience all situations.
Like valentines day and weddings it is all about her so women create the dating scene whatever's that is and men are foolish enough to play along.
That's same dating scene in U.S as well now!
Being alone doesn't mean you're lonely.. Nobody wants to end up being miserable after marriage..
A business that built off people misery 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
The US government knows all about such businesses
True
@@kwamebushman606 👀 you're on to something.
Stonkz
@@kwamebushman606 Facts! Most businesses are built of someone's misery and low self esteem.
The "lady monopoly" in dating gets a reality check by hardworking and noble men.. Get a juice of that first.
This is the highest form of sadness
reverse moustache cat but it's not a bad idea
I feel so sad for her :(
It's been 5 years I hope she's living happily with or without a partner.
There was a time when she rejected nice guys and guys frowned upon her but she keep rejecting her. But after 30 her beauty fade way and the nice guys ignored her.
It's her own fault.
@@shaun2513agreed
It looks like Haruna is very happy for wearing a wedding dress and taking beautiful pictures and I think she is having fun 😍 That was an amazing video❤ , I liked it , thanks very much DW team🙋♀️ ,Japan is a Wonder land 🎎
The ceremony is mostly booked shortly before a 30th or 40th birthday.... hmmmm
And?
@@ajl2232 What "And"?
High Standards without having High Quality.
yes
True
true very true
I think this is awesome! She just wanted to do something that made her feel good about herself and to feel beautiful. If someone wants to dress up and have a day to wear a beautiful dress and make up and have pictures as memories I don’t see that as self centered at all. She’s making her own happiness and not depending on anyone else to do it for her. I love it! 😊👍
But at the end of the day I bet she cried on her pillow for being so lonely
I think this is happening because society has made weddings kind of a rite of passage that people feel like they must go through at a certain age. Society tell little girls that they will get married and be a bride someday. The emphasis is usually a lot more on the wedding than on the marriage relationship itself.
I think some people want to experience a wedding and don’t necessarily want the burden of marriage. It’s a great way to make your dream happen and not deal with the man.
Always found that confusing, but then again, I am male.
MGTOW is taking effect......
*This is Actually SAD Story..*
Self marriage huh? I bet deep inside she is feeling eternal loneliness. I feel bad for her, not in a condescending way.
What’s wrong with trying to find her Mr. right? So you think women should just compromise and marry someone they don’t really love if they get older?
It's just a photo shoot of the woman in a wedding dress. She has her divorced sister and niece/nephew and parents for company. She figures she will never marry, so she's getting a photo of herself to hang on the wall. Then she can go on with her life and focus on other things.
Why do you feel bad? She doesn’t? 🙃
A perfect business strategy based on vanity hiding under"self-discovery" of " I worth it".
It will be very profitable in future 😎
Without self sacrifice there is no commitment. Without getting rid of selfishness, there is not marriage.
marriage is not the only way for eternal happiness, one can be happy without being married with kids
*Workaholics.*
I am a workaholic too. I prefer it that way.
I thought that was South Korea
Bs they are sociospastics
I'm not sure if it's being a workaholic rather it's the work culture of the nation to needlessly take too much time out of their people. Lack of good jobs and low pay for how much work is put in.
I can’t imagine doing all of that (especially the dating website) to meet someone. Maybe it’s just me but ALL of the men I found extremely attractive I just happened to meet when I wasn’t even looking (it taught me to always keep enjoying life and eventually I’ll meet the right one).
I usually bump into a few at conventions. Who pays for dating sites? Pay a weekly pass at Supercon and bump into many cute guys with similar interests. I have yet to find one that doesn't want kids.
I knew as a small child I never wanted to marry. I've never seen a happily married couple but even if I knew some it wouldn't change my views. I'm in my forties and love being single. I don't date, I don't care at all for relationships. I would consider throwing some kind of singleness party for my female friends and myself, dressing up, taking pictures and having fun, though I wouldn't consider it marriage for myself. Marriage and children just isn't a vital part of life for many people, and I'm one of them.
I share some of the same. I'd like a life partner, but not through the scam of marriage, and god forbid... children. Everyone around me makes dating and relationships look like bad ideas, so I never bothered to pursuit it personally. I've almost come to terms that I'm probably ok with being single, but I feel like I'm missing something if opt out. I'm way too terrified to find out anyway, so I'll remain scared and timid and single forever. At least I have all this time to do cool stuff.... alone.
This is what secularism has done to turkey
Weddings are more about the self centered woman fantasy than the actual marriage. The dress, the cake, the centrality of a romantic party in which she is the center, It’s a beautiful fantasy. It’s alright to have it.
The thing is: sometimes you get so used to being single (for a long time), the thought of another person living with you and be by your side and sharing life together can get really intimidating and unusual --> like wedon't even have place for another person in our life, because we established being living on our own, which is kinda sad :')
This made me so sad.
Tina but i love this
mens r not slave of feminism
I am single, 45 year old woman. Watching this I feel sad too. I am not pretty enough to ever have a husband so I kind of always knew I wouldn't get married. So I reconciled my self to that a while ago. However she is pretty and that is why I feel sad. She always figured she would get Married. So she has not had the time I have had to reconcile with that reality. On the other hand this show gave me an idea, not for a solo marriage. But to treat myself every year to a satisfying experience that we can look back on. I think that is what the solo marriage is all about. I think I am going to treat my self to an interesting travel adventure every year. I always thought it was sad yo take photos as I was by my self in them , but now I realize the necessity of it . I want to be able to say , even if it is just to my self, you did that. That is you in Hawaii, that is you in Paris etc. I think this is something, women, married or single should do.
@All dogs Go To Heaven they're lot of single men your age, you definitely can get married if you want ! Best luck :)
@@nbert35 love your optimism, stay straight......
MGTOW
I'm a 42 year old divorced American woman and know that 1000% I am my own soulmate. I don't understand society's obsession with being coupled up.
In 100 years we will know about Japan only from Internet and books.
And from Anime. Lots, and lots, of Anime.
@@LionKimbro god bless them , they didn't go extinct for nothing