I recently stopped talking to a friend that would communicate everything indirectly: Her annoyances w/ me, feelings of entitlement in regards to my money, guilt tripping etc. I gave her money as a gift but as soon as I said NO…she began bad talking me as if I would not find out. Bad friend.
Thank you so much for saying sometimes we have to walk away - I had to cut off contact with my abusive family. In a way they cut themselves off by their behavior. I'm learning to see that now. It has been very hard & in the past I had so much guilt & confusion about this. I didn't want to have to cut them off but they made it absolutely intolerable to have even email communication. It was eventually a lawyer that told a lawyer my mom hired to not contact me. It was hell for so long. I'm learning to accept my unconventional life of not having a family but it's hard. Society always shows how good people come from good homes. Family is everything. And I wish more than anything that it was true for me too. Of course I want to have a family to do things with, have fun and enjoy holidays. But I didn't get that. I can't control them, or their behavior. Thank you. As an adult survivor of child abuse I'm happy to hear this advice. When you said you're used to people making you feel like everything is your responsibility - that hit me hard. That's exactly it. I'm 40 & I'm just learning now that No the things someone else did or how they live their life is not my responsibility. As much as I want good for everyone its not in my best interest or theirs to always be the problem solver. I'm allowed to have my life. And my happiness - guilt free. TLDR - Thank you 🙏🏻❤️
Thank you for sharing, Charlotte. I can very much relate to everything you say here. Every person wishes to have good parents and to grow up in a loving family, but alas, that is not in our control. The only thing in our control is what we will do to make the best of it if given the cards we are dealt. I am known for saying, "blood is not always family, and blood does not excuse abuse." I am glad to see that more and more people are starting to see that just because someone is related to us does not mean we must maintain a relationship with them. As adults, we have agency, and we alone get to decide how we wish to spend our precious time, energy, and resources and with whom.
@@LifeIsLoveSchool Thank you so much for your response. I absolutely agree. It's important that we accept ourselves & not take on the blame or shame of something we have no control over. As adults we have the ability to heal & love & find the people who we enjoy spending time with. One of my favorites is remembering the saying: "blood is thicker than water" is really "blood of the convent is thicker than the water of the womb”, which has the exact opposite meaning. The original meaning actually doesn’t refer to family at all and instead comes from the idea that a bond made with someone that you’ve shed blood with is stronger than one had with someone you’ve shared the womb with. And I know that is true. People will come in and out of our lives as we all grow & change. I'm learning that it isn't time that determines who the best people to have in your life are. Happy weekend and happy Halloween! 🎃
I second everything you say, and thank you for sharing the quote! I agree that bonds you've made by choice are more important than bonds of only DNA. After all, from a DNA perspective, any two human beings are 99.9 percent identical, so whether we are minutely closer in DNA to some blood relative is truly irrelevant when deciding whether to keep them in our lives.
My mom used to guilt trip me in paying all her bills including food and housing. That fact allowed her not to work. At some point I was just fed up. So, we are past the point, I give her my money. She's currently suing me for parent allemony (which is a thing in Eastern Europe).
I hear you. The phrase "pro-life" is meaningless because almost everyone is pro-life unless one is a sadistic psychopath who kills for joy. To guilt-trip women into having children they are not mentally, financially, or physically able to care for is irresponsible and ultimately harms the welfare of not just the mother, but the child as well.
It's great that you have the awareness. What do you plan to do about it if someone guilt trips you in the future? Even if we don't know how to respond on the spot, we can review what happened so we can do better next time. Life is about constant learning and growing, and not perfection.
Hey, i loved how you explained solving guilt trip step by step. I would like to request you to make more contents about dealing with abusive partners. Thanks a lot.
Few years back my sister told me how much my parents are suffering from lack of money, that they don’t use heater in winter, etc etc. Well I started giving them money only to find out a year later, my dad gave all that money to my mom cause she was demanding money to go shopping with. It wasn’t even used to pay bills or anything. It was just to appease her shopping addiction. I was very upset internally tbh
What if I have a girlfriend who’s always guilt tripping me? She will get crazy angry and act insane, and then when I can t take it anymore and make some distance, then she guilt trips me that I have hurt her, and how can I say I’m a good person etc. and I don’t even know what her deal is .
Set boundaries and give space for healing. Sometimes people don't forgive and they keep bringing stuff up. You don't have to break up to give space but it allows you to think clearly and not just be unhappy because you like the comfort of each other's company.
They forget conveniently supposedly that the woman is alive she is a person and her body is the agency and that she is creating and maintaining the functions of an oblivious fetus starting at conception and continuing at implantation
The video is good, but what if they are guilt tripping you for something you can’t change, or you live with the person? Like, just for example, a kid in middle school gets guilt tripped from their mom for agreeing with their dad in an argument, or a high schooler gets guilt tripped by their dad for not spending enough time with them. My friends younger sister is dealing with things like this right now, and I want to help them, but I don’t know what to do.
Great questions! The key is to understand the difference between when you've actually done something wrong vs. when you did not, but your actions are not what somebody else wants.
They're going to try their arguments borderline I'm telling women who have not even conceived yet that they are not the mothers when they are. What sort of warm Envy going to head the opposite effect crazy man. If you simply acknowledge the mother is the creator celebrate her and let her have a positive enjoyable experience, women will want to be prepared Shirley pregnant
i heard the "life review" at end of life guilt trips you, will even guilt trip a baby for dumb things it dose that dosent know better about, so what is this place what is this thing what is that life review is it "God" or a peaice of shit demigurge?
I recently stopped talking to a friend that would communicate everything indirectly: Her annoyances w/ me, feelings of entitlement in regards to my money, guilt tripping etc. I gave her money as a gift but as soon as I said NO…she began bad talking me as if I would not find out. Bad friend.
Thank you so much for saying sometimes we have to walk away - I had to cut off contact with my abusive family. In a way they cut themselves off by their behavior. I'm learning to see that now. It has been very hard & in the past I had so much guilt & confusion about this. I didn't want to have to cut them off but they made it absolutely intolerable to have even email communication. It was eventually a lawyer that told a lawyer my mom hired to not contact me. It was hell for so long. I'm learning to accept my unconventional life of not having a family but it's hard. Society always shows how good people come from good homes. Family is everything. And I wish more than anything that it was true for me too. Of course I want to have a family to do things with, have fun and enjoy holidays. But I didn't get that. I can't control them, or their behavior. Thank you. As an adult survivor of child abuse I'm happy to hear this advice. When you said you're used to people making you feel like everything is your responsibility - that hit me hard. That's exactly it. I'm 40 & I'm just learning now that No the things someone else did or how they live their life is not my responsibility. As much as I want good for everyone its not in my best interest or theirs to always be the problem solver. I'm allowed to have my life. And my happiness - guilt free. TLDR - Thank you 🙏🏻❤️
Thank you for sharing, Charlotte. I can very much relate to everything you say here. Every person wishes to have good parents and to grow up in a loving family, but alas, that is not in our control. The only thing in our control is what we will do to make the best of it if given the cards we are dealt.
I am known for saying, "blood is not always family, and blood does not excuse abuse." I am glad to see that more and more people are starting to see that just because someone is related to us does not mean we must maintain a relationship with them.
As adults, we have agency, and we alone get to decide how we wish to spend our precious time, energy, and resources and with whom.
@@LifeIsLoveSchool Thank you so much for your response. I absolutely agree. It's important that we accept ourselves & not take on the blame or shame of something we have no control over. As adults we have the ability to heal & love & find the people who we enjoy spending time with. One of my favorites is remembering the saying: "blood is thicker than water" is really "blood of the convent is thicker than the water of the womb”, which has the exact opposite meaning. The original meaning actually doesn’t refer to family at all and instead comes from the idea that a bond made with someone that you’ve shed blood with is stronger than one had with someone you’ve shared the womb with. And I know that is true. People will come in and out of our lives as we all grow & change. I'm learning that it isn't time that determines who the best people to have in your life are. Happy weekend and happy Halloween! 🎃
I second everything you say, and thank you for sharing the quote! I agree that bonds you've made by choice are more important than bonds of only DNA.
After all, from a DNA perspective, any two human beings are 99.9 percent identical, so whether we are minutely closer in DNA to some blood relative is truly irrelevant when deciding whether to keep them in our lives.
I really enjoyed listening to this ❤thank you
Simply Thanx.
Anytime!
Please don't ever allow anybody to put your on health aside! It is never fruitful for yourself!!!
My mom used to guilt trip me in paying all her bills including food and housing. That fact allowed her not to work. At some point I was just fed up. So, we are past the point, I give her my money. She's currently suing me for parent allemony (which is a thing in Eastern Europe).
That’s outrageous
Great video! I still get that from my mom! Making notes and probably will make a video to tell my peeps about this to!
Thank you, and I look forward to your video!
I like this!
I was thinking of the pro-choice pro-life argument with their guilt tripping women into having children..
I hear you. The phrase "pro-life" is meaningless because almost everyone is pro-life unless one is a sadistic psychopath who kills for joy.
To guilt-trip women into having children they are not mentally, financially, or physically able to care for is irresponsible and ultimately harms the welfare of not just the mother, but the child as well.
My teacher guilt tripped me on my birthday for the entire class and kept talking about me the entire day
It's great that you have the awareness. What do you plan to do about it if someone guilt trips you in the future?
Even if we don't know how to respond on the spot, we can review what happened so we can do better next time. Life is about constant learning and growing, and not perfection.
Hey, i loved how you explained solving guilt trip step by step. I would like to request you to make more contents about dealing with abusive partners. Thanks a lot.
Wow. Thanks for putting this content online ❤️ this spoke to me directly
You are very welcome, Kavitha!
Hallelujah 🎶
Forgive 70x7
God is good ♥️
Thank you for this amazing content.🙌🏻
You are very welcome, Julia!
Few years back my sister told me how much my parents are suffering from lack of money, that they don’t use heater in winter, etc etc. Well I started giving them money only to find out a year later, my dad gave all that money to my mom cause she was demanding money to go shopping with. It wasn’t even used to pay bills or anything. It was just to appease her shopping addiction. I was very upset internally tbh
Thank you very much 👍
You’re welcome!
What if I have a girlfriend who’s always guilt tripping me? She will get crazy angry and act insane, and then when I can t take it anymore and make some distance, then she guilt trips me that I have hurt her, and how can I say I’m a good person etc. and I don’t even know what her deal is .
Set boundaries and give space for healing. Sometimes people don't forgive and they keep bringing stuff up. You don't have to break up to give space but it allows you to think clearly and not just be unhappy because you like the comfort of each other's company.
What if you say no and they keep guilt tripping you that you are a bad person and ungrateful for saying no. How can you manage the guilt?
I was guilt tripping my friend I feel really bad for doing that and I don’t know what to do.
They forget conveniently supposedly that the woman is alive she is a person and her body is the agency and that she is creating and maintaining the functions of an oblivious fetus starting at conception and continuing at implantation
What if they aren’t accepting and out smart u
Thank you for the question - can you give an example? Happy to give you my suggestion if you have an example to share.
The video is good, but what if they are guilt tripping you for something you can’t change, or you live with the person? Like, just for example, a kid in middle school gets guilt tripped from their mom for agreeing with their dad in an argument, or a high schooler gets guilt tripped by their dad for not spending enough time with them. My friends younger sister is dealing with things like this right now, and I want to help them, but I don’t know what to do.
Great questions! The key is to understand the difference between when you've actually done something wrong vs. when you did not, but your actions are not what somebody else wants.
Thanks! This really helped a lot (:
@@ThatObnoxiousMagpie You are welcome.
They're going to try their arguments borderline I'm telling women who have not even conceived yet that they are not the mothers when they are. What sort of warm Envy going to head the opposite effect crazy man. If you simply acknowledge the mother is the creator celebrate her and let her have a positive enjoyable experience, women will want to be prepared Shirley pregnant
i heard the "life review" at end of life guilt trips you, will even guilt trip a baby for dumb things it dose that dosent know better about, so what is this place what is this thing what is that life review is it "God" or a peaice of shit demigurge?