I am restructuring this show A LOT (as you can see over the weeks lol) so we'll have some fun simple vids for a bit and then Super Cyber Funhouse Friday will be back and better in May. I'll still be here at 4PM on Fridays until then! Also, FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM!!! I need more bozos there lol. I'm @ bigbossboze 🥰
An update to the 1st one; The husband saw the post. When she came home from being on a work trip, he had taken his stuff and left. He left a letter saying the post was the most hurtful thing he’s ever read, that her jealousy was insane, and “I fucking watched her die. She was walking by my side when it happened. I have nightmares about it”. Her sister also said that if OP gets a new partner she will fill him in on what a black hearted c*** she is. I feel SO bad for the husband who is obviously traumatized
@@Silver-o1zHe literally told her the whole thing. He gave her the info at the beginning. Everyone around them corroborated the whole thing. She was married to his friend. They had been friends for 12-20 years. Friends are the family you get to choose and if you'd give up 20 years of friendship over someone else's jealousy, that wasn't a friendship.
@@Silver-o1znot to mention that the friend DIED right next to him. And his wife's jealousy kept him from having an outlet to express the loss of 20 years of friendship to sudden death. She just re-traumatized him over and over.
@@Silver-o1zHaving a partner that would force you to chose either her or a friend is a red flag. He told her straight up the situation. If she had a problem with it, she should have discussed it with him, a therapist or just left.
@@outathisworld2130 Links won't post. Here's the title: [UPDATE] Me [24m] with my gf [32F] of 2 years, moved in 6 months ago and am disgusted by a secret shes been keeping
@@outathisworld2130 Can't link here. Title - [UPDATE] Me [24m] with my gf [32F] of 2 years, moved in 6 months ago and am disgusted by a secret shes been keeping
i dont know why people are saying the guy in the first story is an asshole when he was honest from the start that they were friends and that's that. if she had a problem she should have left when he told her so. a grown woman being a big baby about how she cant control who his friends are is crazy and the fact the people are agreeing with her is worse. she resented a woman to the point where her death didn't stop her from hating her. shes a horrible person. i would never give up a friend I've had for 20+ years for someone else just because their insecure about themselves. she only wanted him to have him there's not a single point in her story about how much she loves and cares about him as a person. its only about her complete resentment over a dead woman. thankfully he left her so I'm happy for him. He doesn't owe her his past but she could've been his future and she destroyed it
It's because some people really are as insecure as OP and don't realize thar it's actually NOT healthy to be jealous of your partner's friend when they've clearly laid out that they're just friends and there's nothing untoward going on. Kinda ironic that those people nodding along to OP don't seem to realize that they need to get a grip on that insecurity crap or they'll end up like OP: alone because they said some horrific things out of an insecurity fueled competition they made up in their heads.
right… theyre probably girls who think ts is funny and like to make jokes abt how obsessive they are and like yeah in moderation its funny but if you genuinely believe she is somehow valid youre sick like oh my god?? i make silly jokes when i like a guy too but she clearly doesnt care for him and she is just straight up evil almost to the point that i firmly believe if she hadnt passed when she did and her anger continued to boil she wouldve acted out, whether violently or verbally
I'm friends with some of my exes, but I never misrepresent those relationships. Calling her his friend while leaving out they were married is a giant red flag, and I probably would have moved on as well.
The 1# story has an update, the post was found by someone and eventually got shared with the husband. When she went on a trip for work I think, he packed up his things and moved in with his friends husband. I believe they had no contact after he moved out. The friends husband also sent a text and told her to stay away from him. Even her family and friends have told her off and probably go no contact. She ends the update blaming the deceased friend for how everyones reacted. 😮
@sandbees597 that's not the craziest part, She left out that her her husband was right next to the woman as she had the aneurysm. I think he took advice and got therapy
She was mad that she lost the one sided competition and could basically never win after the other competitor passed on. And she thought maybe she could steal a win by stopping him from going to her funeral. It is some of the most childish, insecure bullshit Ive ever come across. When someone dies, thats usually when normal humans stop being petty about earthly BS and go pay their respects. But OP turned her petty up to 11 and really hurt the one person she is supposed to care about more than anyone else. But she cared about herself and her petty competition more. She got what she deserved, hopefully she will learn from this and maybe her family will eventually forgive her. But there are worse things in the world than having to start over at 40, though not many.
the first aita makes me wonder if the "competition" was real or if it was just her projecting her resentment that he said hed choose the ex over her. i bet the ex wasnt even aware of how she felt.
Yeah, projecting doesn't get enough press really. Personally, I can only see someone that says who you can or can't be friends with as someone to avoid.
It's projection. OP confirmed that not only was the ex married, but the ex's husband was friends with OP's husband. It's clear to everyone, even OP's family, that there were only platonic feelings between the husband and ex. The only one who seemed to have a problem or think otherwise was OP. What is the worse part is OP's husband was there when she died. They had gone out to a lunch or movie and she died during the outing. So not only is he mourning but he's probably traumatized and this was her response. If anyone is interested OP's husband is leaving her unsurprisingly.
@@soccersinger101 imo OP is the kind of person who can't stand the fact that there was anyone else before her. Nevermind that the husband and ex are friends, never mind that their spouses are friends. The fact that she's around his ex is a reminder to her that she isn't some special, life changing princess for him and he's had other relationships. It's petty, it's nasty, and frankly it's pathetic. Anyone who answered that they're a 1 to Boze's question about leaving a relationship where the partner has that kind of relationship with their ex (yep, Boze included. Sorry queen, you were bound to be wrong about something) is showing their insecurity.
@khaleesireyna731 I think that can be true. I could honestly understand that, though. I can be a 1, depending on the relationship of my SO & the ex. If they both have a platonic relationship, I would be completely fine with it.
the first story: he gave her an out immediately. he said “this is how it is and if it doesn’t work for you, leave now.” and she stayed. she’s a horrible person
3:12 I said 2 in the chat too, and I stand by it. My best friend in the world is my ex. I’d say the same thing to a boyfriend, if you’re uncomfortable with it, it can’t work out between us, and he says the same to girls he dates. The guy in the story is honest every part of the way, and the girl is obviously not. She’s the AH. It also sounds like they’re not good together at all, considering how she acts about him being sad over his friend dying. I’d break up with her if I was in that situation and my partner was so insensitive and insecure
yea i find it ridiculous that ppl act like you cant be friends with an ex especially if they didn't really see each other as a romantic partner which is what happened here and saved their friendship for the both of them. shes to old to act like a bby she should have just left him from the get go when he told her
@@ashleyyjinxx honestly, I think it's because people would rather let their insecurities out and try to dictate who their partner can associate with rather than seek some damn therapy and get over that crap.
@@ashleyyjinxx It happened to me as well. Were best friends, tried a relationship but turned out we weren't that good of a romantic couple and went back to being friends. If you can't bring yourself to trust your partner then you need to quit the relationship or get help. Not isolate the other person from relationships they had for decades.
I’m defs a 1 for the first aita. She is literally the definition of a “yes girl”. Building resentment all while he’s clueless and from the start he was very open and had clear communication of which she didn’t reciprocate whatsoever
Or maybe all yall 1s need therapy. If you see someone that is good friends with their ex (rather than being mortal enemies who start screaming fights any time they're around each other) as odd, that's a YOU issue. It's called having an amicable split and it's what emotionally healthy adults do a lot, I highly recommend trying it!
@@khaleesireyna731I think op meant they’re a one as in they agree that the woman was the asshole, not as in they’d act the same as her. Bc otherwise the rest of her comment doesn’t make sense
@@hairless_wizard completely agree but given OPs behavior, it's because she thought she could eventually "talk" (read:manipulate) him into cutting off his best friend.
@@hairless_wizard that's definitely one of the biggest issues and another reason she's TA full stop. Her husband was honest with her from the get go, but she wasn't and from the post it sounds like it's because she thought she could manipulate him later. Again, OP is probably one of the biggest nuclear dumpster fires I've seen on AITA and I listen to a lot of those while I work.
I was seeinga guy many years back, and he made a few really questionable comments a couple weeks into our relationship. I asked him what the fuck he was on about, and long story short, he was both racist and queer-hostile. I dumped him on the spot. He seriously couldn't understand why that was a deal breaker for me. Good riddance.
My mom (ex-wife #4) used to hang out with one of my father's exes (ex-wife #3). They all hung out together. The older siblings were adults at this time, but us younger kids (her youngest 2 and the 3 of us of my mom's kids) all hung out together. I always forget that's not normal until I hear stories like that woman being jealous of the ex-wife.
For the first one I can't understand the people saying that they were both assholes or the husband was an asshole. I think he was just being very straightforward with her. The husband divorcing his friend and realizing that their feelings were entirety platonic just shows how mature of a person he was, and him giving his wife a warning to accept it or leave was just him very correctly knowing that dating someone whose not mature enough to accept that exes can be friends will result in a relationship bound to fall apart
Honestly I don't believe it's called maturity. Handling it in a manner is maturity but those are boundaries. If the wife wasn't comfortable that is her boundary but I think she should've left if she couldn't accept that he wanted his ex still in his life.
She's definitely a 1 ,and the the "competion" is 1 sided. I think her husband made it clear the ex-wife is someone very important to him so she would understand how he values the ex's friendship and to avoid her thinking the ex was trying to get gim back or cheat .
Exactly! For me, personally, hearing a potential partner say that they're on good terms/friends with their ex is a GREEN flag to me. It shows emotional maturity and an ability to communicate. It also shows that their capable of going their separate ways if the relationship isn't working out. Anyone who goes on about how crazy their exs are is a red flag in my book.
Some people have boundarieees ✨and its a common one to have. (Not being friends with exs) She should have heard that in the beginning and left. She became the asshole. But dont dog on people who have these types of boundaries.??
@@Echokeresit didn’t seem like they were saying it was bad that she had the boundary, they were just saying in their opinion they view someone who can be on good terms with an ex post break-up as a sign that they’re communicative and emotionally mature compared to someone who demonizes their ex after a bad breakup bc in that case there’s two sides to that story that the new person wasn’t there for and it could imply that there was some wrongdoing on their partners end in the past that might affect the current relationship
@Echokeres boundareeees✨️ only apply to what YOU do and how interactions with YOU are gone about. Demanding that YOUR PARTNER allow you to tell them who they can and can't associate with or be friends with isn't a healthy boundary, it's being insecure and controlling. Try again, sweetie. Try going to therapy✨️ and unpacking why your boundarees✨️ apply to who OTHERS can and can't associate with.
That first one was insane. If his ex had been that much of an issue for you from the start, why did you marry him? Why draw the line at her funeral? Like at that point, you literally could've just bitten your tongue for another few months, let him go to the funeral, do his grieving, help him heal, and eventually only "have to hear about her" every once in a while when all their friends reminisce about her. But for some reason, you had to ruin his life and your own by deciding the funeral was to much? Seek help, get therapy, and I hope he finds someone who loves him and does right by him
The first woman could've just hold in her grudges a bit longer so she wouldn't look like an asshole. Like let him go to the funeral. She aint gonna steal your man now.
Oh, no, it's a good thing she showed how deeply selfish, insecure and downright nasty she is. No one should have to deal with THAT kind of person after they just lost their friend. And in case you didn't know, OP updated the post because her husband ended up finding it and leaving her sociopathic a$$. As he should. And as anyone who thinks like OP should be ditched. If you in anyway sympathize with a person who said "I was happy when my partner's friend died" seek therapy because dear God people should avoid you like the plague you are if you think/act like that.
@@heatherva because that's his best friend and I've seen your comments before. Fascinating that you're still defending the OP on this despite their vile behavior. 🙄
I wonder if OP would've been an actually decent human being instead of the monstrous nuclear dumpster fire masquerading as a person that she really was if the husband had just explained the whole thing by using that Spice Girls song.
Yo that first story reminds me of a relationship i had where i was up front with the guy that i never wanted kids and then a YEAR IN once id thoroughly fallen for him he admitted he "secretly" wanted a daughter. (Dude was abusive in lots of ways and I was thouroughly entangled so unfortunately I did stay with him for another year, but this WEIGHED on me those whole 12 months.) If someone has boundaries for their relationships that you aren't cool with then they're NOT for you, WALK AWAY. And if you have boundaries, hopes, dreams, or heck relationship-specific *secrets* then friggin voice those! Early!
Yeah sure be friends, go to each others funeral ir whatever. But to reguarly go to movies alone with your ex and give your current partner an ultimatum that you would choose your ex over them? Thats too much. My ex (who i was with for 7 years) tries to be friends with me and while im happy to chat with him i know his wife doesnt like it so i cut him off out of respect for her. I would love to have him as a friend, we knew each other for so long and he knows me better and on a deeper level than anyone else currently in my life, unfortunately tho it would be inappropriate so i take the L out of respect for his wife - a woman ive never even met yet this guy cant have the same respect for his partner? Gross.
@@anima6035 Y’know what the difference is here? The fact that you know that means his wife has made her discomfort clear, and you also chose what makes you more comfortable. This man was honest to her from the start, they were both married to different people, the ex’s new spouse was friends with them as well and frankly, I think the person without respect for their partner is the bitch who told her husband he can’t go to his friend’s funeral after HE LITERALLY WATCHED HER DIE RIGHT NEXT TO HIM, TRYING TO GRIEVE WHILE SUFFERING NIGHTMARES FROM THE TRAUMA. The person she supposedly loves is hurt, yet instead of supporting him, she lets all her petty jealousy out when she had every chance to leave beforehand, thinking she could change him and choose his friends for him. It’s not his fault she lied and pretended to be okay with it when he gave her the opportunity to leave from the beginning. What? Is he supposed to read her fucking mind? She chose this, and then chose to make her traumatised husband suffer even more than he already is by essentially saying his grief doesn’t matter cause his friend is dead now. He found out about this post btw, and packed his stuff to move in with the widowed husband for the time being while she was on a work trip, leaving a letter for her telling her how callous she’s been to him. The widow texted her to never come near them again, and her own family and friends are calling her out for being so heartless. Her own sister even warned her she’d tell her next boyfriend about this so he’d know what he was getting into. She retraumatised her husband, lost her marriage and destroyed her relationships with her friends and family, and she has no one to blame but herself. Miss me with that “respect for his partner” bullshit.
Shame on that Woman being jealous of a now Dead Woman!! The fact she actually literally said she basically told him something along the lines of, "you had a couple days to cry, she is gone you can get over it now". How dare anyone try to tell someone how they are allowed to grieve and for how long. Absolutely DISGUSTING!! She never should have lied about the whole thing and pretending she was fine with the friendship. As she admitted to doing herself. Just utterly disgusting and GROSS behavior. Some people!! Wow. Some people and their very shitty behavior truly never cease to amaze me. Seems like especially these days!!
OH DUDE the funeral is so fucking real cause my mom was dating this dude that was just AAAAABSOLUTELY garbage and it never seemed to click with her that he was trash until her ex (my little sisters adoptive dad) had passed away and mcdipstick was absolutely refusing to let her go to the ex's wake cause he knew he wasnt shit even compared to a dead man so yeah that reeks of insecurity
i find it really strange that for someone that encourages open and trusting communication, Boze copped out with ESH in the first situation. the husband made it clear that he didn't feel anything romantically for his ex but still holds her in high regard, and we're supposed to think he's an AH for having a BFF??? this kind of thinking just proliferates the moronic notion that "guys and girls can't be friends" if you can't handle it, just leave like Boze said she would; but don't blame your SO for your toxic emotions when you choose to stick around and let that jealousy fester, while *everyone* (including the ex's SO) makes it clear they were just friends with a deep non-romantic connection
I completely agree with this. I’m a girl, and even I can see the total hypocrisy in this situation. Why can girls have best friends and also a partner but guys can’t??? He already tried a relationship with the other girl, and both of them did the mature thing and decided to split when it didn’t work well. I think it’s great that they were still able to stay best friends, and the husband made it very clear that he wouldn’t tolerate crazy jealousy over this situation and would choose his best friend over someone he met more recently. The fact that he literally witnessed a person he’s cared about for 20 years die right in front of him and his wife is HAPPY about it is disgusting.
@@backupthingI’ll start this with I’m male and didn’t agree with Boze on that, it was a bit of a surprise but I don’t think it’s hypocritical for her to say “no thank you” it’s hypocritical to say I have my ex but you can’t have yours, Boze was probably put off by the heavy ultimatum, although people underestimate what a true friendship is, the woman was very insecure yes but Boze wasn’t on that boat, most people are selfish in terms of love, I’m sure Boze is more confused on why she stayed on such a heavy handed terms, although we aren’t getting how he laid it out, she’s probably making it sound worse than it was to garner sympathy. compromise is important and the OP tried and failed, mainly on not supporting him when he needed it and then complaining about it, her “I didn’t need to feel like hiding it” is a term I’ve heard and dislike hearing when context is clear.
@@domc9801I'd bet you at least $20 that it wasn't an ultimatum at all irl. He probably told her that she doesn't get to control who he is friends with and set a healthy boundary after she brought it up, but since she has the mentality of a 14 year old, she heard "I'll choose her over you"
I mostly agree with you, and I apologize for not making it clear that i meant the OP/the situation was hypocritical, not Boze! As far as I remember from the vid she wasn't hypocritical, though i still don't agree with her opinion of the situation.@@domc9801
If you’re gonna lie about being married to someone, I don’t think you have a right to act like the victim when your s/o gets suspicious of the status since you kept it from them.
I wouldn’t have left, that kind of thing wouldn’t bother me. I have long time friends that will always be part of my life & anyone who loves me would never ask me to give up friends. If they did, I’d see that as a red flag and I’d leave 😂
She made the choice to stay with him! She knows that’s what she signed up for so she can’t be mad and switch up on him like that 💀💀 (this isn’t responding to anyone I’m just rewatching and like baffled
I wouldn’t even find it weird for an ex husband who wasn’t still friends with the ex wife to attend the funeral let alone if they did remain friends. They loved each other at one point enough to marry of course he will mourn her death.
Whew that first story. She’s the asshole. Not only was he honest with her and she chose to stay, but she died on her way back to her car after lunch with him, he was probably there and was traumatized.
In the 1st story, OP was 1000% the jerk. The only competition was the one OP had in her mind. The ex was so moved on she was married to someone else and her husband was friends with OP's husband. Even OP's family saw that there was no romantic aspect to their relationship. If your SO sets a clear boundary, gives you an out if you can't handle it and you continue to stay and ask them to change their mind for YEARS, you are the problem. Also to hate someone so much to say that they no longer exist cause they are dead after your SO watched her die is so disgusting the word disgusting doesn't even emphasize this enough. Also, shocker, OP is getting divorced. The husband told her he couldn't stay with someone who could not even attempt to support him while he mourns and processes seeing his friend die.
Husband found the post and left her. He's staying with his best friend's husband and OP still blames the friend. Hope she ends up in an Edgar Allen Poe style story where the ghost of the friend haunts her for being an insecure b!tch and that ghost is the only company she has.
I feel like a partner still being good friends with an ex would be a green flag, right? Like, he's so nice that he even comes out of break-ups in a good mood with both him and his ex still being able to just hang out without it being awkward. Golden retriever energy.
I’m friends with two of my exes. They were really great, impressive guys-it’s how they got to make such a mark on my life. And although my current guy isn’t good friends with his exes, I respect them as really together women- they are beautiful and successful and I’m proud to be in good company.
BRO HE NEEDS TO LEAVE THIS WOMAN. She's actually heartless for thinking he'd be done with mourning his friend of 20+ years in only a few days....let alone not going to her funeral. Dude needs to leave her for good, her true colors have finally come out.
The last story does have some updates, if I'm remembering correctly he confronted his girlfriend about the tabs and asked her if she was just morbidly curious about it. The girlfriend flipped about him snooping and her privacy for a while before admitting she did agree with the blogs & they broke up, obvi
So the woman in the first story would allow her husband to go to the movies and go out to lunch with his ex, but going to her funeral was a step too far? I’m so confused by her logic. Like girl, the danger has passed (literally). I don’t think the husband was an asshole at all, both he and his ex were married to different people and he was even friends with her husband. Hearing that there was an update and that he moved in with her husband makes me so happy. They both sound very emotionally mature and I hope they’re able to comfort each other and heal together.
I am lesbian (this matters because we are more likely to stay friends with our exes than cis/het people) and friends with a lot of my exes. I tell people right away that my friendships with my exes are a preexisting condition, so if they aren't okay with that, we shouldn't pursue a relationship. Twice I've had people tell me it was fine, then try to guilt and blackmail me into ending those friendships. Honesty is key. Don't get into a relationship with someone if there is a part of their life that you aren't okay with.
Inever understood why people get jealous when their partner has a friend who for 99% of the friendship were just friends, mistook a healthy friendship for something more, quickly lesrned their lesson and kept bejng friends. I dont get it- even with unrelated relationships. If you've been best friends with someone for years are you really expected to gkve that up cause of your partner. gender of the friend really shouldnt matter- (btw just for some context i am autistic and really struggle with stuff like thid. I really dont understand it- could someone try to explain?)
agree! i have a male friend who even though we arent best friends, i care alot about, and at one point i did have very strong feelings for him, but if one day down the line i had an SO who didnt like the idea of me and him still being friendly, even though he isnt my best friend or anything i wouldnt just cut him off.. like thats my friend!
It probably comes from trauma of some sort. If you were wronged by a cheating partner in the passed, you start associating similar things to your current present. It’s not healthy but I’m sure op felt slighted since the thought was “this women is more important than I am to him” which isn’t true probably and he at least valued her equally if not more so if he he decided to marry her. Not defending OP’s actions too because who tf tells a loved one that they can’t go to a funeral of a long time friends ;;
My ex found my recently dead fiancés box of stuff in the closet and knew all about him and showed up to my job and dumped all his shit in the street. He says you still love him more than me. The guy at my job who almost knocked his ass out for being a psycho picked up all the things from the street , got rid of the dude and ended up becoming a great new boyfriend for three years. Friends to this day twelve years later..jealous psycho says he still wants to kill me for betraying him keeping a box of dead guys stuff. So. He’s definitely the asshole. I also got raped on a vacation with family and the psycho screamed at me that I cheated on him…yeah his parents didn’t hug him enough and I’m glad I got out before he got violent.
I’m sorry but the guy in the first story had a girl best friend the guy is not even close to being an asshole if anything it’s her fault for not keeping it 100 with him
It’s the fact that she was forewarned that if it would be a problem to her that they would could just save themselves both the heartache of not seeing eye to eye on the matter and not get anymore serious. She chose to instead think she could manipulate him or become more important that the other woman in his life (despite them just being friends at that point) and probably hoped that once that was accomplished that he’d have no need for this other person. That’s possessive, not territorial like she wanted to think, and that’s both self manipulation (delusional) and manipulative of him (because he clearly wasn’t wanting to let go of his friend). Her whole “I don’t want/ I don’t like, therefore he’s in the wrong” mentality is self centered and immature.
@Jodavisaugust that also got disclosed way before they got serious. Op was given multiple outs but she keep picking the wrong choices(for her specifically.) She was jealous and was competing with a woman who probably doesnt see her husband as other than close friend(which was the reason the husband and the "ex" divorced.) What she said after her death and during the times before the funeral was also cold, bitchy and straight up cruel thing to say.
for the first story I'm definitely a 2. Half of my friends are people I've dated and realized were better off platonic than romantic, one of these guys being someone I've known and been friends with since we were twelve (we're turning 24 now) and if anyone tried to make me "choose" I would let them excuse themself. I do empathize with the discomfort, though. Maybe it's me being queer, maybe it's me being autistic - I don't think being friends with exes is a red flag. Personally it seems like a green flag for someone to be able to go through something like a breakup well enough to still have both parties care for each other and want to continue a healthy and platonic friendship.
I think this is the first thing I strongly disagree with Boze about. The only AH in the first story is OP, her husband was honest from the start, set healthy boundaries and gave her the opportunity to leave if she was uncomfortable. She’s the one who lied and stayed with him hoping she could manipulate him into cutting his friend out completely, despite the fact they had both moved on and found new partners, and stewed in resentment cause he couldn’t read her mind and abandon a longtime friendship. Then, while her husband is already traumatised from seeing his friend die right in front of him, she says “No you’re not going to her funeral, she’s dead so your grief doesn’t really matter, just get over it.” It’s no surprise that the husband, the widow and even OP’s own friends and family called her a heartless bitch and abandoned her in droves, and she only has herself to blame (yet still blames the deceased friend cause she’s that much of an entitled brat).
I just wanted to say that all i saw was green flags from OP's ex husband in the 1st story because he told her almost straight up about a really close friend of his being in a relationship with him for some time. He also communicated about his boundaries with his friendship and his relationship with OP(i would also choose my long time friendships over someone i just recently started dating), even going over those boundaries as well, meaning he was true to his words. It was clearly all platonic after they split so OP was clearly projecting and letting her insecurities win over her thoughts.
I'm poly so this scenario, even if I had jealousy, would never prompt me to deny access to honoring, grieving, and sending off a cherished and loved platonic life companion. Op is a huge asshole. I'd divorce immediately.
My grandma died from an aneurysm because it’s such a sudden death like literally she was at a dinner party. She hosted at her house. She walked up to her porch to get some air, and then she died. Her pastor had to call 911 Anyways, sudden deaths really fuck up a lot of family situation so she is extra extra the asshole for this because it’s gonna be so hard for him
For the first one, she’s 100% in the wrong imo. He was upfront from the start how important this friendship was to him and gave her an out. Their relationship didn’t work for a reason and they both moved on, I genuinely don’t think they held onto romantic feelings afterwards. This woman sounds diabolical, she obviously doesn’t really care about her husband, she just wants to be the winner.
Homegirl from story 1 needs to check her insecurity with a therapist. She was warned about how close the dude was with his ex and (best) friend, stayed anyway, was pressed during the 10+ year relationship and was still pressed after the poor woman DIED! Like what in the actual fuck????
all #1 wouldve had to say is "hey im actually NOT comfortable with you being alone and going on date-like outings with someone you have a long history and used to be intimate with." and couldve ended shit early instead of playing cool girl to get the guy and building her own resentment
She has nobody to blame but herself, he was very clear about how it'd be and she went along with it. Not to mention she's heartless for everything post death
I think I'd be fine with my partner being that close with an ex, as long as I get to be their friend too. If the ex is coming over for dinner and being supportive? Great! If I never meet them and they're always sneaking off to spend time together alone? That's where I start to get uncomfortable
I'm not. Anyone defending said ghoul needs therapy and drop their insecurities before they end up like OP, dumped by everyone because their mask slipped and showed what a dumpster fire of a human being they actually are.
I married my first boyfriend ever two years ago. He was my boyfriend my senior year of high school and we ended up breaking up because he was grown (20 and ready to party) and I was 17. And two years ago, 20 years later, he reached out to me and we started talking and I moved him to where I live, and we got married. That whole time of rekindling our relationship was an adjustment for both of us. He had to learn to accept that I had life experiences different from his and that we both had PTSD from being through certain life circumstances. In short, he had grown extremely racist and intolerant along with his severe social anxiety, I had grown very chill and overly tolerant (if that’s a thing, but I would let people take advantage), and really the opposite of what I was in high school. He doesn’t believe anything the same as me, and sometimes resents my views, and I his, but he is definitely my safe place, my best friend, and my match in every way. I cannot live without him. I honestly never thought that I could ever be with someone who holds some of his views, but we make it work beautifully!
when my husband passed i was 24. he was first first real everything. since then I've had a hard time forming other relationships, and when I've rejected a few dudes they hit me with variations of "I feel like im competing with a ghost" despite my only talking about him when he's brought up, unless it with our mutual friends. some ppl just can't even
Im not a fan of people in relationships being super controlling of who their partner can and can't be friends with. I wouldn't want someone to control who I can and can't be friends with. Maybe this is just a straight people thing and thats why I don't understand her issue.
I just commented a paragraph but forget it. Who stops someone from going to another persons funeral? The only reason you shouldn’t go is if the deceased closest loved ones wouldn’t want you there (or if it was a private ceremony and you weren’t invited).
“Do you like black people..?” I don’t know why but that was so hilarious to me cause the concept to me is crazy lol maybe it’s the gen z in me that’s never had that thought process but my fiancé is 17 years older than me.. (I was 25 when we met 27 at engagement just for context I was and am of clear sound fully aware mind lol) he’s not racist it’s just the way we talk sometimes is when I’m very fully reminded he’s a gen x. But then, his friends who are POC, don’t have a problem with it and talk the same way and I’m just sitting there as a white girl being the only person who is like, is this okay?? Lol 😅
I would have left in that kind of scenario but not because he was wrong to set his boundaries that way. But yes this lady is totally wrong for how she's treating everyone after this lady's death.
Im friends with someone i dated , weve known each other since we were kids. He was my best friend growing up and is now one of my closests friends. I love his daughter and his gf ( daughters mom) . I think theyre perfect for each other. The guy im currently seeing is aware of all this and he is also ok with it and has become friends with them as well. That being said my friend and i respect our partners boundaries . I made sure his gf knew i respect her feelings and that she isnt crazy for being uncomfortable. Long story short over the course of 5 years everyones become cool with it 🤸🏻♀️. Sometimes you can just remain friends and have it be platonic
1st one : Bro, even her husband had no issues with the relafionship. That woman is INSANE. The first woman is not the asshole, she is THE VILLAIN of that man's life. 2nd one: what. She is a criminal. Full on crime here. But why does he want to know if he is the asshole, though? Bro, YOU ARE NOT. WHAT? THERE IS NO QUESTION, GET OUT.
She’s TA. If she feels uncomfortable that’s on her. He told her (kind’ve rudely) about what it was. He was very blunt and didn’t beat around the bushes. So continuing to date him and seeing that nothing has changed (she’s still uncomfortable and he’s still friends with his ex), she could choose to stay with him and suck it up or leave him
9:26 “my friend (insert name of black friend) and i were talking and they recommended me watch this mini series.” *turn on roots* or just turn on American History X look to her after and be like “thoughts?? 😊”
@/first story- I’m FTM trans, grew up with lots of friends who are girls (different situation I know) but a few of those friends (3 to be exact) are my core ride or dies, people I’d drop everything for. I couldn’t imagine dropping those friends because of a potential partner’s insecurities. Just my personal perspective
I nearly met up with a seemingly perfect, also disabled (the irony) guy to go on a lovely date, then out of the blue he started asking if I’m Jewish. “No I’m a good little blue-eyed, blonde-haired angel 😇” ( _heavy_ sarcasm, bc who tf asks that??) “Okay great, I got so traumatised by _them_ in Afghanistan & realised the importance of being proud of and preserving our race…” GUYS I DIDN’T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CRY. I THINK I DID BOTH💀💀 I’m so leftist I ran even harder left to get away
Then even tho he _was_ military (I didn’t know this prior, also not USA but we’re allies) he started telling me his LARPing rank in German, did think ppl like that were real here
My gosh the first lady is such a mean and insecure person. Take the responsability gee, if you can't get over them being friends (and nothing happened for 10 years because she would have mentioned the most minuscule suspect if he was cheating) then it's a you problem. I agree with the husband, not his problem if she is one of those person that can't have a platonic friend of the opposite sex, but it is however her problem if she can't understand people that can...
(for the first one) EVEN IF I FELT LIKE THAT THE WHOLEEE TIME I WOULDVE LET HKM GO TO THE FUNERAL!!! ITS ONE LAST TIME YOU GOTTA LET IT HAPPEN LIKE COME ONNNNNN
Luckily I met my gf during 2020 during the height of Black Lives Matter so racism was a hot topic and I legit said “ok I know ur not supposed to talk about race or politics but I needa know now if you hate black people cus that’s gonna be a deal breaker.” Which then launched a convo about our views and we agreed lol. We are an interracial lesbian couple tho so one of us being racist is would be strange, in my opinion 😂😂😂😂
The chick the second store is one hundred percent wrong and vile. When it first said she was a sympathizer. I thought it was gonna go in the way for the people that were the normal people in germany they got forced into what a certain german leader did. But no, turns out she was just an evil person
That first girl is terrible, the competition was probably(most likely) made up in her mind, because she had a boundary set with her at the beginning that she was an important friend, he’s not the asshole for having friends and setting a boundary around them :P she could’ve been friends too. She chose to be the bad person instead, how does that make him an asshole?
I am restructuring this show A LOT (as you can see over the weeks lol) so we'll have some fun simple vids for a bit and then Super Cyber Funhouse Friday will be back and better in May. I'll still be here at 4PM on Fridays until then! Also, FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM!!! I need more bozos there lol. I'm @ bigbossboze 🥰
thank you for creating and being yourself boze fr :) 🖤 i get so hype when you post !!!!
❤❤🎉
ur awesome
I absolutely love all these different types of content !!!! Thank you for being you ❤
1
An update to the 1st one;
The husband saw the post. When she came home from being on a work trip, he had taken his stuff and left. He left a letter saying the post was the most hurtful thing he’s ever read, that her jealousy was insane, and “I fucking watched her die. She was walking by my side when it happened. I have nightmares about it”. Her sister also said that if OP gets a new partner she will fill him in on what a black hearted c*** she is. I feel SO bad for the husband who is obviously traumatized
holy cck
@@Silver-o1zHe literally told her the whole thing. He gave her the info at the beginning. Everyone around them corroborated the whole thing. She was married to his friend. They had been friends for 12-20 years. Friends are the family you get to choose and if you'd give up 20 years of friendship over someone else's jealousy, that wasn't a friendship.
@@Silver-o1znot to mention that the friend DIED right next to him. And his wife's jealousy kept him from having an outlet to express the loss of 20 years of friendship to sudden death. She just re-traumatized him over and over.
@@Silver-o1zHaving a partner that would force you to chose either her or a friend is a red flag. He told her straight up the situation. If she had a problem with it, she should have discussed it with him, a therapist or just left.
@@marissam3176it's really not. A friendship goes A LOOOONG way than a girl/man you start to date after a while.
There was an update on the Na*i story. He did confront her, she got nasty & her views are vile. He left that night. 👏
Link?!
thank god he left, that was crazy
@@outathisworld2130 Links won't post. Here's the title: [UPDATE] Me [24m] with my gf [32F] of 2 years, moved in 6 months ago and am disgusted by a secret shes been keeping
@@outathisworld2130 Links won't post here.
@@outathisworld2130 Can't link here. Title - [UPDATE] Me [24m] with my gf [32F] of 2 years, moved in 6 months ago and am disgusted by a secret shes been keeping
I thought I was insecure but today I learnt there’s people intimidated by women who are deceased
english is my 2nd language, but, isn’t it ‘learned’?
Yeah you're right @@mafeazuaje
@@mafeazuajesometimes we use learnt as like a funny slang but yes you are correct
Yeaaaaa……..I feel like at these point you should get therapy
there's even people that get jealous when you want to bring flowers to your ex's funeral, like sure you can go, just dont bring any flowers.
i dont know why people are saying the guy in the first story is an asshole when he was honest from the start that they were friends and that's that. if she had a problem she should have left when he told her so. a grown woman being a big baby about how she cant control who his friends are is crazy and the fact the people are agreeing with her is worse. she resented a woman to the point where her death didn't stop her from hating her. shes a horrible person. i would never give up a friend I've had for 20+ years for someone else just because their insecure about themselves. she only wanted him to have him there's not a single point in her story about how much she loves and cares about him as a person. its only about her complete resentment over a dead woman. thankfully he left her so I'm happy for him. He doesn't owe her his past but she could've been his future and she destroyed it
It's because some people really are as insecure as OP and don't realize thar it's actually NOT healthy to be jealous of your partner's friend when they've clearly laid out that they're just friends and there's nothing untoward going on. Kinda ironic that those people nodding along to OP don't seem to realize that they need to get a grip on that insecurity crap or they'll end up like OP: alone because they said some horrific things out of an insecurity fueled competition they made up in their heads.
right… theyre probably girls who think ts is funny and like to make jokes abt how obsessive they are and like yeah in moderation its funny but if you genuinely believe she is somehow valid youre sick like oh my god?? i make silly jokes when i like a guy too but she clearly doesnt care for him and she is just straight up evil almost to the point that i firmly believe if she hadnt passed when she did and her anger continued to boil she wouldve acted out, whether violently or verbally
I'm friends with some of my exes, but I never misrepresent those relationships. Calling her his friend while leaving out they were married is a giant red flag, and I probably would have moved on as well.
They’re the plot girls! 😂
@jandoel he literally explained from the beginning of his and OPs relationship that they were exs but they're just friends, now. Try again
The 1# story has an update, the post was found by someone and eventually got shared with the husband. When she went on a trip for work I think, he packed up his things and moved in with his friends husband. I believe they had no contact after he moved out. The friends husband also sent a text and told her to stay away from him. Even her family and friends have told her off and probably go no contact.
She ends the update blaming the deceased friend for how everyones reacted. 😮
That’s fucking crazy.
(Thanks for giving that update omg)
im so happy for him maybe now he can actually mourn with his family and friends without her
@sandbees597 that's not the craziest part, She left out that her her husband was right next to the woman as she had the aneurysm. I think he took advice and got therapy
She was mad that she lost the one sided competition and could basically never win after the other competitor passed on. And she thought maybe she could steal a win by stopping him from going to her funeral.
It is some of the most childish, insecure bullshit Ive ever come across. When someone dies, thats usually when normal humans stop being petty about earthly BS and go pay their respects. But OP turned her petty up to 11 and really hurt the one person she is supposed to care about more than anyone else. But she cared about herself and her petty competition more.
She got what she deserved, hopefully she will learn from this and maybe her family will eventually forgive her. But there are worse things in the world than having to start over at 40, though not many.
smh, it’s like she’s trying to die alone
the first aita makes me wonder if the "competition" was real or if it was just her projecting her resentment that he said hed choose the ex over her. i bet the ex wasnt even aware of how she felt.
Yeah, projecting doesn't get enough press really. Personally, I can only see someone that says who you can or can't be friends with as someone to avoid.
I feel like it’s projection
It's projection. OP confirmed that not only was the ex married, but the ex's husband was friends with OP's husband. It's clear to everyone, even OP's family, that there were only platonic feelings between the husband and ex. The only one who seemed to have a problem or think otherwise was OP.
What is the worse part is OP's husband was there when she died. They had gone out to a lunch or movie and she died during the outing. So not only is he mourning but he's probably traumatized and this was her response.
If anyone is interested OP's husband is leaving her unsurprisingly.
@@soccersinger101 imo OP is the kind of person who can't stand the fact that there was anyone else before her. Nevermind that the husband and ex are friends, never mind that their spouses are friends. The fact that she's around his ex is a reminder to her that she isn't some special, life changing princess for him and he's had other relationships. It's petty, it's nasty, and frankly it's pathetic. Anyone who answered that they're a 1 to Boze's question about leaving a relationship where the partner has that kind of relationship with their ex (yep, Boze included. Sorry queen, you were bound to be wrong about something) is showing their insecurity.
@khaleesireyna731 I think that can be true.
I could honestly understand that, though.
I can be a 1, depending on the relationship of my SO & the ex.
If they both have a platonic relationship, I would be completely fine with it.
the first story: he gave her an out immediately. he said “this is how it is and if it doesn’t work for you, leave now.” and she stayed. she’s a horrible person
3:12 I said 2 in the chat too, and I stand by it. My best friend in the world is my ex. I’d say the same thing to a boyfriend, if you’re uncomfortable with it, it can’t work out between us, and he says the same to girls he dates.
The guy in the story is honest every part of the way, and the girl is obviously not. She’s the AH. It also sounds like they’re not good together at all, considering how she acts about him being sad over his friend dying. I’d break up with her if I was in that situation and my partner was so insensitive and insecure
yea i find it ridiculous that ppl act like you cant be friends with an ex especially if they didn't really see each other as a romantic partner which is what happened here and saved their friendship for the both of them. shes to old to act like a bby she should have just left him from the get go when he told her
@@ashleyyjinxx honestly, I think it's because people would rather let their insecurities out and try to dictate who their partner can associate with rather than seek some damn therapy and get over that crap.
@@ashleyyjinxx It happened to me as well. Were best friends, tried a relationship but turned out we weren't that good of a romantic couple and went back to being friends. If you can't bring yourself to trust your partner then you need to quit the relationship or get help. Not isolate the other person from relationships they had for decades.
I’m defs a 1 for the first aita. She is literally the definition of a “yes girl”. Building resentment all while he’s clueless and from the start he was very open and had clear communication of which she didn’t reciprocate whatsoever
Or maybe all yall 1s need therapy. If you see someone that is good friends with their ex (rather than being mortal enemies who start screaming fights any time they're around each other) as odd, that's a YOU issue. It's called having an amicable split and it's what emotionally healthy adults do a lot, I highly recommend trying it!
@@khaleesireyna731Yeah but the biggest problem is still that she was never honest with her husband about her feelings
@@khaleesireyna731I think op meant they’re a one as in they agree that the woman was the asshole, not as in they’d act the same as her. Bc otherwise the rest of her comment doesn’t make sense
@@hairless_wizard completely agree but given OPs behavior, it's because she thought she could eventually "talk" (read:manipulate) him into cutting off his best friend.
@@hairless_wizard that's definitely one of the biggest issues and another reason she's TA full stop. Her husband was honest with her from the get go, but she wasn't and from the post it sounds like it's because she thought she could manipulate him later. Again, OP is probably one of the biggest nuclear dumpster fires I've seen on AITA and I listen to a lot of those while I work.
I was seeinga guy many years back, and he made a few really questionable comments a couple weeks into our relationship. I asked him what the fuck he was on about, and long story short, he was both racist and queer-hostile. I dumped him on the spot. He seriously couldn't understand why that was a deal breaker for me. Good riddance.
You dodged a whole missile girl
My mom (ex-wife #4) used to hang out with one of my father's exes (ex-wife #3). They all hung out together. The older siblings were adults at this time, but us younger kids (her youngest 2 and the 3 of us of my mom's kids) all hung out together. I always forget that's not normal until I hear stories like that woman being jealous of the ex-wife.
They were definitely boning when you went to speep
For the first one I can't understand the people saying that they were both assholes or the husband was an asshole. I think he was just being very straightforward with her. The husband divorcing his friend and realizing that their feelings were entirety platonic just shows how mature of a person he was, and him giving his wife a warning to accept it or leave was just him very correctly knowing that dating someone whose not mature enough to accept that exes can be friends will result in a relationship bound to fall apart
i agree i cant see how what he said was bad .. he probably been through a lot of girls who were intimidated by that friendship
I agree completely
It's not appropriate
@@salmaabdullahgb It's completely appropriate.
Honestly I don't believe it's called maturity. Handling it in a manner is maturity but those are boundaries. If the wife wasn't comfortable that is her boundary but I think she should've left if she couldn't accept that he wanted his ex still in his life.
Thats last story....😶 That is NOT what I thought was the secret.
I enjoyed the opossums eating bananas though. 😂
I did an actual spit take.
She's definitely a 1 ,and the the "competion" is 1 sided. I think her husband made it clear the ex-wife is someone very important to him so she would understand how he values the ex's friendship and to avoid her thinking the ex was trying to get gim back or cheat .
Exactly! For me, personally, hearing a potential partner say that they're on good terms/friends with their ex is a GREEN flag to me. It shows emotional maturity and an ability to communicate. It also shows that their capable of going their separate ways if the relationship isn't working out. Anyone who goes on about how crazy their exs are is a red flag in my book.
Some people have boundarieees ✨and its a common one to have. (Not being friends with exs)
She should have heard that in the beginning and left. She became the asshole. But dont dog on people who have these types of boundaries.??
Like you can have a solid mutual breakup and actually go your separate ways instead of continuing to be friends.
@@Echokeresit didn’t seem like they were saying it was bad that she had the boundary, they were just saying in their opinion they view someone who can be on good terms with an ex post break-up as a sign that they’re communicative and emotionally mature compared to someone who demonizes their ex after a bad breakup bc in that case there’s two sides to that story that the new person wasn’t there for and it could imply that there was some wrongdoing on their partners end in the past that might affect the current relationship
@Echokeres boundareeees✨️ only apply to what YOU do and how interactions with YOU are gone about. Demanding that YOUR PARTNER allow you to tell them who they can and can't associate with or be friends with isn't a healthy boundary, it's being insecure and controlling. Try again, sweetie. Try going to therapy✨️ and unpacking why your boundarees✨️ apply to who OTHERS can and can't associate with.
That first one was insane. If his ex had been that much of an issue for you from the start, why did you marry him? Why draw the line at her funeral? Like at that point, you literally could've just bitten your tongue for another few months, let him go to the funeral, do his grieving, help him heal, and eventually only "have to hear about her" every once in a while when all their friends reminisce about her. But for some reason, you had to ruin his life and your own by deciding the funeral was to much? Seek help, get therapy, and I hope he finds someone who loves him and does right by him
The first woman could've just hold in her grudges a bit longer so she wouldn't look like an asshole. Like let him go to the funeral. She aint gonna steal your man now.
Or she should have left both the times he “offered” her
Oh, no, it's a good thing she showed how deeply selfish, insecure and downright nasty she is. No one should have to deal with THAT kind of person after they just lost their friend. And in case you didn't know, OP updated the post because her husband ended up finding it and leaving her sociopathic a$$. As he should. And as anyone who thinks like OP should be ditched. If you in anyway sympathize with a person who said "I was happy when my partner's friend died" seek therapy because dear God people should avoid you like the plague you are if you think/act like that.
Its not about her "stealing" him, its just like, why does he care about his ex so much to want to attend her funeral?
@@heatherva because that's his best friend and I've seen your comments before. Fascinating that you're still defending the OP on this despite their vile behavior. 🙄
@@heathervaEXACTLY. that’s wild. My husband would never do that
Here's the thing: if you wanna be my lover, you've got to get with my friends. Make it last forever, friendship never ends.
I wonder if OP would've been an actually decent human being instead of the monstrous nuclear dumpster fire masquerading as a person that she really was if the husband had just explained the whole thing by using that Spice Girls song.
Best line to ask about racism: “so…. Are you a UFCK’n N🎉Zi????”
I love the "OMG is she messy" then the reveal and scream
Being early sucks cause wdym I have to form my own opinion :((
this is so real. same reason why i only watch videos thru reactors 😭
Real
Real.
This is the realest thing I’ve ever read
😂😂
Yo that first story reminds me of a relationship i had where i was up front with the guy that i never wanted kids and then a YEAR IN once id thoroughly fallen for him he admitted he "secretly" wanted a daughter. (Dude was abusive in lots of ways and I was thouroughly entangled so unfortunately I did stay with him for another year, but this WEIGHED on me those whole 12 months.)
If someone has boundaries for their relationships that you aren't cool with then they're NOT for you, WALK AWAY.
And if you have boundaries, hopes, dreams, or heck relationship-specific *secrets* then friggin voice those! Early!
It's a good sign that someone can be friends with their exes after breaking up. It's a sign that they're mature adults.
I’d say that depends on how the relationship ended. Cause some friendships with exes can be just as toxic as when they were dating
Codependent
Yeah sure be friends, go to each others funeral ir whatever. But to reguarly go to movies alone with your ex and give your current partner an ultimatum that you would choose your ex over them? Thats too much.
My ex (who i was with for 7 years) tries to be friends with me and while im happy to chat with him i know his wife doesnt like it so i cut him off out of respect for her. I would love to have him as a friend, we knew each other for so long and he knows me better and on a deeper level than anyone else currently in my life, unfortunately tho it would be inappropriate so i take the L out of respect for his wife - a woman ive never even met yet this guy cant have the same respect for his partner? Gross.
@@anima6035 Sounds more like a W on your end.
@@anima6035 Y’know what the difference is here? The fact that you know that means his wife has made her discomfort clear, and you also chose what makes you more comfortable. This man was honest to her from the start, they were both married to different people, the ex’s new spouse was friends with them as well and frankly, I think the person without respect for their partner is the bitch who told her husband he can’t go to his friend’s funeral after HE LITERALLY WATCHED HER DIE RIGHT NEXT TO HIM, TRYING TO GRIEVE WHILE SUFFERING NIGHTMARES FROM THE TRAUMA.
The person she supposedly loves is hurt, yet instead of supporting him, she lets all her petty jealousy out when she had every chance to leave beforehand, thinking she could change him and choose his friends for him. It’s not his fault she lied and pretended to be okay with it when he gave her the opportunity to leave from the beginning. What? Is he supposed to read her fucking mind?
She chose this, and then chose to make her traumatised husband suffer even more than he already is by essentially saying his grief doesn’t matter cause his friend is dead now. He found out about this post btw, and packed his stuff to move in with the widowed husband for the time being while she was on a work trip, leaving a letter for her telling her how callous she’s been to him. The widow texted her to never come near them again, and her own family and friends are calling her out for being so heartless. Her own sister even warned her she’d tell her next boyfriend about this so he’d know what he was getting into.
She retraumatised her husband, lost her marriage and destroyed her relationships with her friends and family, and she has no one to blame but herself. Miss me with that “respect for his partner” bullshit.
Shame on that Woman being jealous of a now Dead Woman!! The fact she actually literally said she basically told him something along the lines of, "you had a couple days to cry, she is gone you can get over it now". How dare anyone try to tell someone how they are allowed to grieve and for how long. Absolutely DISGUSTING!! She never should have lied about the whole thing and pretending she was fine with the friendship. As she admitted to doing herself. Just utterly disgusting and GROSS behavior. Some people!! Wow. Some people and their very shitty behavior truly never cease to amaze me. Seems like especially these days!!
OH DUDE the funeral is so fucking real cause my mom was dating this dude that was just AAAAABSOLUTELY garbage and it never seemed to click with her that he was trash until her ex (my little sisters adoptive dad) had passed away and mcdipstick was absolutely refusing to let her go to the ex's wake cause he knew he wasnt shit even compared to a dead man
so yeah that reeks of insecurity
i find it really strange that for someone that encourages open and trusting communication, Boze copped out with ESH in the first situation. the husband made it clear that he didn't feel anything romantically for his ex but still holds her in high regard, and we're supposed to think he's an AH for having a BFF??? this kind of thinking just proliferates the moronic notion that "guys and girls can't be friends"
if you can't handle it, just leave like Boze said she would; but don't blame your SO for your toxic emotions when you choose to stick around and let that jealousy fester, while *everyone* (including the ex's SO) makes it clear they were just friends with a deep non-romantic connection
I completely agree with this. I’m a girl, and even I can see the total hypocrisy in this situation. Why can girls have best friends and also a partner but guys can’t??? He already tried a relationship with the other girl, and both of them did the mature thing and decided to split when it didn’t work well. I think it’s great that they were still able to stay best friends, and the husband made it very clear that he wouldn’t tolerate crazy jealousy over this situation and would choose his best friend over someone he met more recently.
The fact that he literally witnessed a person he’s cared about for 20 years die right in front of him and his wife is HAPPY about it is disgusting.
@@backupthingI’ll start this with I’m male and didn’t agree with Boze on that, it was a bit of a surprise but I don’t think it’s hypocritical for her to say “no thank you” it’s hypocritical to say I have my ex but you can’t have yours, Boze was probably put off by the heavy ultimatum, although people underestimate what a true friendship is, the woman was very insecure yes but Boze wasn’t on that boat, most people are selfish in terms of love, I’m sure Boze is more confused on why she stayed on such a heavy handed terms, although we aren’t getting how he laid it out, she’s probably making it sound worse than it was to garner sympathy.
compromise is important and the OP tried and failed, mainly on not supporting him when he needed it and then complaining about it, her “I didn’t need to feel like hiding it” is a term I’ve heard and dislike hearing when context is clear.
@@domc9801I'd bet you at least $20 that it wasn't an ultimatum at all irl. He probably told her that she doesn't get to control who he is friends with and set a healthy boundary after she brought it up, but since she has the mentality of a 14 year old, she heard "I'll choose her over you"
I mostly agree with you, and I apologize for not making it clear that i meant the OP/the situation was hypocritical, not Boze! As far as I remember from the vid she wasn't hypocritical, though i still don't agree with her opinion of the situation.@@domc9801
If you’re gonna lie about being married to someone, I don’t think you have a right to act like the victim when your s/o gets suspicious of the status since you kept it from them.
I wouldn’t have left, that kind of thing wouldn’t bother me. I have long time friends that will always be part of my life & anyone who loves me would never ask me to give up friends. If they did, I’d see that as a red flag and I’d leave 😂
The first story makes me sick in multiple ways I can’t even describe it 😭😭
SAME!
She made the choice to stay with him! She knows that’s what she signed up for so she can’t be mad and switch up on him like that 💀💀 (this isn’t responding to anyone I’m just rewatching and like baffled
I wouldn’t even find it weird for an ex husband who wasn’t still friends with the ex wife to attend the funeral let alone if they did remain friends. They loved each other at one point enough to marry of course he will mourn her death.
Whew that first story. She’s the asshole. Not only was he honest with her and she chose to stay, but she died on her way back to her car after lunch with him, he was probably there and was traumatized.
Stopping anyone from going to a funeral and having closure, is CRAZYYY
In the 1st story, OP was 1000% the jerk.
The only competition was the one OP had in her mind.
The ex was so moved on she was married to someone else and her husband was friends with OP's husband.
Even OP's family saw that there was no romantic aspect to their relationship.
If your SO sets a clear boundary, gives you an out if you can't handle it and you continue to stay and ask them to change their mind for YEARS, you are the problem.
Also to hate someone so much to say that they no longer exist cause they are dead after your SO watched her die is so disgusting the word disgusting doesn't even emphasize this enough.
Also, shocker, OP is getting divorced. The husband told her he couldn't stay with someone who could not even attempt to support him while he mourns and processes seeing his friend die.
The childhood friend wins every time. No replacement for that bond.
Crazy, insecure, immature woman in the 1st story sounds like she’s still in middle school emotionally. I hope HE left her 🙄
he did someone said in a reply to another comment
Husband found the post and left her. He's staying with his best friend's husband and OP still blames the friend. Hope she ends up in an Edgar Allen Poe style story where the ghost of the friend haunts her for being an insecure b!tch and that ghost is the only company she has.
I feel like a partner still being good friends with an ex would be a green flag, right? Like, he's so nice that he even comes out of break-ups in a good mood with both him and his ex still being able to just hang out without it being awkward.
Golden retriever energy.
It depends on how it ends. Once certain lines (past friends) are crossed I don’t get how ppl can go back like it never happened
With how all my relationships ended and what happened during them, for me it be a big red flag beinf friends with your ex. But thats just me
I’m friends with two of my exes. They were really great, impressive guys-it’s how they got to make such a mark on my life. And although my current guy isn’t good friends with his exes, I respect them as really together women- they are beautiful and successful and I’m proud to be in good company.
Well he didn’t tell her they were married before, he just told her they were good friends.
BRO HE NEEDS TO LEAVE THIS WOMAN. She's actually heartless for thinking he'd be done with mourning his friend of 20+ years in only a few days....let alone not going to her funeral. Dude needs to leave her for good, her true colors have finally come out.
Demanding that your partner breaks up with their friends to fulfill your own jealousy is such a clear red flag imo
First situation: she has tarnished herself in his eyes. Even if he goes, he’s going to resent his wife forever.
The last story does have some updates, if I'm remembering correctly he confronted his girlfriend about the tabs and asked her if she was just morbidly curious about it. The girlfriend flipped about him snooping and her privacy for a while before admitting she did agree with the blogs & they broke up, obvi
So the woman in the first story would allow her husband to go to the movies and go out to lunch with his ex, but going to her funeral was a step too far? I’m so confused by her logic. Like girl, the danger has passed (literally). I don’t think the husband was an asshole at all, both he and his ex were married to different people and he was even friends with her husband. Hearing that there was an update and that he moved in with her husband makes me so happy. They both sound very emotionally mature and I hope they’re able to comfort each other and heal together.
I am lesbian (this matters because we are more likely to stay friends with our exes than cis/het people) and friends with a lot of my exes. I tell people right away that my friendships with my exes are a preexisting condition, so if they aren't okay with that, we shouldn't pursue a relationship. Twice I've had people tell me it was fine, then try to guilt and blackmail me into ending those friendships. Honesty is key. Don't get into a relationship with someone if there is a part of their life that you aren't okay with.
Appreciate the effort you put into your content, it radiates passion and genuine commitment.
Inever understood why people get jealous when their partner has a friend who for 99% of the friendship were just friends, mistook a healthy friendship for something more, quickly lesrned their lesson and kept bejng friends. I dont get it- even with unrelated relationships. If you've been best friends with someone for years are you really expected to gkve that up cause of your partner. gender of the friend really shouldnt matter- (btw just for some context i am autistic and really struggle with stuff like thid. I really dont understand it- could someone try to explain?)
You hit the nail on the head!
agree! i have a male friend who even though we arent best friends, i care alot about, and at one point i did have very strong feelings for him, but if one day down the line i had an SO who didnt like the idea of me and him still being friendly, even though he isnt my best friend or anything i wouldnt just cut him off.. like thats my friend!
It probably comes from trauma of some sort. If you were wronged by a cheating partner in the passed, you start associating similar things to your current present. It’s not healthy but I’m sure op felt slighted since the thought was “this women is more important than I am to him” which isn’t true probably and he at least valued her equally if not more so if he he decided to marry her. Not defending OP’s actions too because who tf tells a loved one that they can’t go to a funeral of a long time friends ;;
Y’all ever heard of “don’t speak ill of the dead”
Yes, but when a trash person like the OP from that story kicks the bucket, I've got a bit of amnesia for that rule.
My ex found my recently dead fiancés box of stuff in the closet and knew all about him and showed up to my job and dumped all his shit in the street. He says you still love him more than me. The guy at my job who almost knocked his ass out for being a psycho picked up all the things from the street , got rid of the dude and ended up becoming a great new boyfriend for three years. Friends to this day twelve years later..jealous psycho says he still wants to kill me for betraying him keeping a box of dead guys stuff. So. He’s definitely the asshole. I also got raped on a vacation with family and the psycho screamed at me that I cheated on him…yeah his parents didn’t hug him enough and I’m glad I got out before he got violent.
im so sorry for your loss and for everything you went through and im so glad you were able to be supported by a new friend ❤️
I’m sorry but the guy in the first story had a girl best friend the guy is not even close to being an asshole if anything it’s her fault for not keeping it 100 with him
Yeah I mean he laid it out when things got serious and wasn't gonna hold it against her if she walked away.
It’s the fact that she was forewarned that if it would be a problem to her that they would could just save themselves both the heartache of not seeing eye to eye on the matter and not get anymore serious. She chose to instead think she could manipulate him or become more important that the other woman in his life (despite them just being friends at that point) and probably hoped that once that was accomplished that he’d have no need for this other person. That’s possessive, not territorial like she wanted to think, and that’s both self manipulation (delusional) and manipulative of him (because he clearly wasn’t wanting to let go of his friend). Her whole “I don’t want/ I don’t like, therefore he’s in the wrong” mentality is self centered and immature.
He did keep the fact that they were married from her.
@Jodavisaugust that also got disclosed way before they got serious. Op was given multiple outs but she keep picking the wrong choices(for her specifically.) She was jealous and was competing with a woman who probably doesnt see her husband as other than close friend(which was the reason the husband and the "ex" divorced.) What she said after her death and during the times before the funeral was also cold, bitchy and straight up cruel thing to say.
@@johncunanan65 should’ve been one of the first things he said about her. Why keep it from her until she really likes him and is in deep?
Ima straight up ask my partner “are you racist?????” 😂 like rnnn
This is my new favorite part of Fridays: BOZE UPLOADING!!!
for the first story I'm definitely a 2. Half of my friends are people I've dated and realized were better off platonic than romantic, one of these guys being someone I've known and been friends with since we were twelve (we're turning 24 now) and if anyone tried to make me "choose" I would let them excuse themself.
I do empathize with the discomfort, though. Maybe it's me being queer, maybe it's me being autistic - I don't think being friends with exes is a red flag. Personally it seems like a green flag for someone to be able to go through something like a breakup well enough to still have both parties care for each other and want to continue a healthy and platonic friendship.
I think this is the first thing I strongly disagree with Boze about. The only AH in the first story is OP, her husband was honest from the start, set healthy boundaries and gave her the opportunity to leave if she was uncomfortable. She’s the one who lied and stayed with him hoping she could manipulate him into cutting his friend out completely, despite the fact they had both moved on and found new partners, and stewed in resentment cause he couldn’t read her mind and abandon a longtime friendship. Then, while her husband is already traumatised from seeing his friend die right in front of him, she says “No you’re not going to her funeral, she’s dead so your grief doesn’t really matter, just get over it.” It’s no surprise that the husband, the widow and even OP’s own friends and family called her a heartless bitch and abandoned her in droves, and she only has herself to blame (yet still blames the deceased friend cause she’s that much of an entitled brat).
I just wanted to say that all i saw was green flags from OP's ex husband in the 1st story because he told her almost straight up about a really close friend of his being in a relationship with him for some time. He also communicated about his boundaries with his friendship and his relationship with OP(i would also choose my long time friendships over someone i just recently started dating), even going over those boundaries as well, meaning he was true to his words. It was clearly all platonic after they split so OP was clearly projecting and letting her insecurities win over her thoughts.
4:50 this man never should have married op
I'm poly so this scenario, even if I had jealousy, would never prompt me to deny access to honoring, grieving, and sending off a cherished and loved platonic life companion. Op is a huge asshole. I'd divorce immediately.
Let this video be the lesson to never be told “they are my ex”…”we are still friends”… “you gotta accept it” and then be fine with it
This isn't "am I the asshole?" it's "am i pathological?" and should somebody do a wellfare check on my husband.
"the question is, am I the a-JERRRK" lmao
My grandma died from an aneurysm because it’s such a sudden death like literally she was at a dinner party. She hosted at her house. She walked up to her porch to get some air, and then she died.
Her pastor had to call 911
Anyways, sudden deaths really fuck up a lot of family situation so she is extra extra the asshole for this because it’s gonna be so hard for him
“Oh my god is she messy?” Oh girl… 😭😭
my day gets so much better when I see boze uploaded :D!!!
For the first one, she’s 100% in the wrong imo. He was upfront from the start how important this friendship was to him and gave her an out. Their relationship didn’t work for a reason and they both moved on, I genuinely don’t think they held onto romantic feelings afterwards. This woman sounds diabolical, she obviously doesn’t really care about her husband, she just wants to be the winner.
Boze is pretty asf
Homegirl from story 1 needs to check her insecurity with a therapist. She was warned about how close the dude was with his ex and (best) friend, stayed anyway, was pressed during the 10+ year relationship and was still pressed after the poor woman DIED! Like what in the actual fuck????
Women uncomfortable about my platonic friends is a BIG, red flag; I would never have been in his position. She's a ghoul.
I was NOT expecting that during that last one 💀
all #1 wouldve had to say is "hey im actually NOT comfortable with you being alone and going on date-like outings with someone you have a long history and used to be intimate with." and couldve ended shit early instead of playing cool girl to get the guy and building her own resentment
She has nobody to blame but herself, he was very clear about how it'd be and she went along with it. Not to mention she's heartless for everything post death
Prereading these comments is crazy. I’m excited yet worried to see what this video has in store
I think I'd be fine with my partner being that close with an ex, as long as I get to be their friend too. If the ex is coming over for dinner and being supportive? Great! If I never meet them and they're always sneaking off to spend time together alone? That's where I start to get uncomfortable
Man, can you imagine lying every day of your life for 10 years? That’s wild.
It is super weird to me that we are actually trying to find an angle to defend this ghoul.
I'm not. Anyone defending said ghoul needs therapy and drop their insecurities before they end up like OP, dumped by everyone because their mask slipped and showed what a dumpster fire of a human being they actually are.
“Use him as an angle…” 😬😑
Oh god she’s looking at AITA
The opossums eating bananas was the same face I made when I heard that 😂😂😂
I married my first boyfriend ever two years ago. He was my boyfriend my senior year of high school and we ended up breaking up because he was grown (20 and ready to party) and I was 17. And two years ago, 20 years later, he reached out to me and we started talking and I moved him to where I live, and we got married. That whole time of rekindling our relationship was an adjustment for both of us. He had to learn to accept that I had life experiences different from his and that we both had PTSD from being through certain life circumstances. In short, he had grown extremely racist and intolerant along with his severe social anxiety, I had grown very chill and overly tolerant (if that’s a thing, but I would let people take advantage), and really the opposite of what I was in high school. He doesn’t believe anything the same as me, and sometimes resents my views, and I his, but he is definitely my safe place, my best friend, and my match in every way. I cannot live without him.
I honestly never thought that I could ever be with someone who holds some of his views, but we make it work beautifully!
yo what 😭😭😭😭
when my husband passed i was 24. he was first first real everything. since then I've had a hard time forming other relationships, and when I've rejected a few dudes they hit me with variations of "I feel like im competing with a ghost" despite my only talking about him when he's brought up, unless it with our mutual friends. some ppl just can't even
Boze you should do R/AmITheDevil next! It’s LITERALLY the worst of the worst!
Im not a fan of people in relationships being super controlling of who their partner can and can't be friends with. I wouldn't want someone to control who I can and can't be friends with. Maybe this is just a straight people thing and thats why I don't understand her issue.
7:57 i love bozes editor lmao
I just commented a paragraph but forget it. Who stops someone from going to another persons funeral? The only reason you shouldn’t go is if the deceased closest loved ones wouldn’t want you there (or if it was a private ceremony and you weren’t invited).
“Do you like black people..?” I don’t know why but that was so hilarious to me cause the concept to me is crazy lol maybe it’s the gen z in me that’s never had that thought process but my fiancé is 17 years older than me.. (I was 25 when we met 27 at engagement just for context I was and am of clear sound fully aware mind lol) he’s not racist it’s just the way we talk sometimes is when I’m very fully reminded he’s a gen x. But then, his friends who are POC, don’t have a problem with it and talk the same way and I’m just sitting there as a white girl being the only person who is like, is this okay?? Lol 😅
I would have left in that kind of scenario but not because he was wrong to set his boundaries that way. But yes this lady is totally wrong for how she's treating everyone after this lady's death.
Im friends with someone i dated , weve known each other since we were kids. He was my best friend growing up and is now one of my closests friends. I love his daughter and his gf ( daughters mom) . I think theyre perfect for each other. The guy im currently seeing is aware of all this and he is also ok with it and has become friends with them as well. That being said my friend and i respect our partners boundaries . I made sure his gf knew i respect her feelings and that she isnt crazy for being uncomfortable. Long story short over the course of 5 years everyones become cool with it 🤸🏻♀️. Sometimes you can just remain friends and have it be platonic
1st one : Bro, even her husband had no issues with the relafionship. That woman is INSANE. The first woman is not the asshole, she is THE VILLAIN of that man's life.
2nd one: what.
She is a criminal. Full on crime here.
But why does he want to know if he is the asshole, though?
Bro, YOU ARE NOT. WHAT? THERE IS NO QUESTION, GET OUT.
GIVE YOUR EDITOR A RAISE!!! That cut with the opossums and bananas was great!!!
She’s TA. If she feels uncomfortable that’s on her. He told her (kind’ve rudely) about what it was. He was very blunt and didn’t beat around the bushes. So continuing to date him and seeing that nothing has changed (she’s still uncomfortable and he’s still friends with his ex), she could choose to stay with him and suck it up or leave him
She stayed for the challenge of getting him to choose her over his ex one day
9:26 “my friend (insert name of black friend) and i were talking and they recommended me watch this mini series.” *turn on roots*
or just turn on American History X
look to her after and be like “thoughts?? 😊”
@/first story- I’m FTM trans, grew up with lots of friends who are girls (different situation I know) but a few of those friends (3 to be exact) are my core ride or dies, people I’d drop everything for. I couldn’t imagine dropping those friends because of a potential partner’s insecurities. Just my personal perspective
I nearly met up with a seemingly perfect, also disabled (the irony) guy to go on a lovely date, then out of the blue he started asking if I’m Jewish.
“No I’m a good little blue-eyed, blonde-haired angel 😇” ( _heavy_ sarcasm, bc who tf asks that??)
“Okay great, I got so traumatised by _them_ in Afghanistan & realised the importance of being proud of and preserving our race…”
GUYS I DIDN’T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CRY. I THINK I DID BOTH💀💀 I’m so leftist I ran even harder left to get away
Then even tho he _was_ military (I didn’t know this prior, also not USA but we’re allies) he started telling me his LARPing rank in German, did think ppl like that were real here
The opossum eating bananas as that edit 😂 this is nothing that could match that info
My gosh the first lady is such a mean and insecure person. Take the responsability gee, if you can't get over them being friends (and nothing happened for 10 years because she would have mentioned the most minuscule suspect if he was cheating) then it's a you problem. I agree with the husband, not his problem if she is one of those person that can't have a platonic friend of the opposite sex, but it is however her problem if she can't understand people that can...
I had no damn clue where that last story was going, holy shit. Fun video! Can't wait to see the revamp!
(for the first one) EVEN IF I FELT LIKE THAT THE WHOLEEE TIME I WOULDVE LET HKM GO TO THE FUNERAL!!! ITS ONE LAST TIME YOU GOTTA LET IT HAPPEN LIKE COME ONNNNNN
bro your editors are amazing
He told her from the beginning he would chose his ex over her.
The guy in the second story could have said, "I learned something about you that you may not realize I know and I did NOT SEE it coming."
Luckily I met my gf during 2020 during the height of Black Lives Matter so racism was a hot topic and I legit said “ok I know ur not supposed to talk about race or politics but I needa know now if you hate black people cus that’s gonna be a deal breaker.” Which then launched a convo about our views and we agreed lol. We are an interracial lesbian couple tho so one of us being racist is would be strange, in my opinion 😂😂😂😂
I… NEVER would’ve guessed where the second one was heading OH MY GOD
Also… just ask her to watch Schindlers List… see where that takes ya lol
The chick the second store is one hundred percent wrong and vile. When it first said she was a sympathizer. I thought it was gonna go in the way for the people that were the normal people in germany they got forced into what a certain german leader did. But no, turns out she was just an evil person
That first girl is terrible, the competition was probably(most likely) made up in her mind, because she had a boundary set with her at the beginning that she was an important friend, he’s not the asshole for having friends and setting a boundary around them :P she could’ve been friends too. She chose to be the bad person instead, how does that make him an asshole?