I am so glad you made this video. I was offered the chance to see some people very important to me who I haven’t been able to afford to visit for over a decade - and I realized that with not being able to afford to travel for so long, while also getting progressively more disabled due to stress and trauma, even considering the idea of taking a flight feels like too much for me. Understanding more about my own sensory issues and having had bad experiences in the past, it just feels like an insurmountable thing - and that’s before the difficulty of being somewhere I can’t easily leave if I need to, and trying to socialize (which I do really love to do, but it also takes so much out of me.) So far what’s helped has been talking with my husband about it. He offered to go with me, and I’ve also started considering finding some things in the area related to my special interests. That way, instead of just a lot of stressful things, there’ll be at least one really easy thing that will help balance stuff out. So now the trip feels possible, but still really stressful. To help with that, I’m gonna do some prep work & visual aids related to things involved with the flight. One of my big issues is that earlier in my adult life, an airline assigned someone to take me from a gate I arrived at to the gate for my next flight. No one had told me this - and I was the one who booked and paid for the flight. I do not have a formal diagnosis even now, so I don’t know why this was done. Anyway, I was told to follow the person but not why, and they wouldn’t respond to me asking where we were going and why. They were carrying a fast food bag, so I suspect they were supposed to be on their lunch break and were frustrated - but as I was a young adult on my own in a strange airport, it was a really stressful experience. It was also very dehumanizing due to no one at any time bothering to explain anything to me; and at that point in my life, I did take flights regularly enough that I knew how to find my gate for connecting flights, finding the proper luggage claim, etc. And after years of seeing reports of abuses by airlines, and also the anti-trans stuff from the TSA, I would find such an experience way more frightening and concerning.
I always like the idea of travel but it really does stress me out. I've rarely traveled by myself. The story at the end was weird, I wonder why that person was assigned, maybe you were the only passanger with that connecting flight? It is also possible they didn't speak English? I have a friend who is completely blind and gets help between gates. Her assistant is often someone who doesn't speak English and with her being blind it can be scary when they don't talk to her or reassure her they are taking her to the right gate. She quite literally is following them blind.
I’ve been learning about and experimenting with stims - like noticing what things I end up doing anyway & trying to make a point of doing them when I’m not anxious just to kind of regulate throughout the day. So far, when I’m not in bed or another place with stim toys or materials, I shake my fists like you do. It’s super helpful, and so easy to do.
Yes. I get so stressed cause everything changes, my routine, my things , my food, maybe I dont like the bed, maybe there is sounds so I cannot sleep etc etc. Last year we were at a trip with another family and I had a meltdown an we had to drive home from that country right away. At home I was to tired to even function, I could barely eat. So exhausted from all this and socializing for 3 days in a row.
You've blown my mind! This all sounds too familiar. I've had crippling food (this used to be my #1 anxiety and is very similar to your experience) & travel anxiety for most of my life, and up until this very moment, I thought it was something I could fix through therapy and medication...it never once occurred to me that this is simply the way I'm wired! I only discovered I was autistic two years ago, so I'm looking forward to having more huge realizations for the next little while 😂 It's beautiful to me that you still go on trips despite your travel anxiety. If it's anything like my own experience....it's just a lot to ask of our system. I also love learning and discovering and seeing new places, but for my whole life, my anxiety has made it so that I tend to stay home. Worse still, the chronic pain I developed over the last 8 years has made it so that I haven't been on a single trip since my pain started. I tried a few times, but then my condition would flare up and I would have to cancel every time, and admittedly, because of my travel anxiety, I remember feeling more relief than sadness. Pain makes everything so much more complicated. It's like my food anxiety x10 (do I have all my meds, is the car seat comfortable, will there be a place to lie down if I need it, the list is endless). So, for now, I'm using travel youtube to get even just a taste of some travel :) And hey, sometimes the food anxiety saves everyone's butts. I got stuck with my parents in an 8 hour stand-still traffic jam in a snow storm, and I had packed enough food and water to get through it no problem 😅
hi i´m autistic and let me tell you, that i like your videos and oposing of what you may think of yourself you are not in any means boring when you´re speaking on the videos in my point of view i can actually relate to what you have said in one ocasion about being yourself even if you need to talk for longer in the videos do it if it feels necessary to you. and about traveling i almost passed out on aeroport because of anxiety ...i think it was because of all comotion, noises people etc.. but fortunatly it ended up ok i catch my flight. keep the great work. 🙂
Thank you so much! I know we shouldn't compare, but it's hard not to and I know a lot of TH-camrs have a much faster pace flashy style. Airports are so very overwhelming for me!!!
Some people on the spectrum avoid travel. I enjoy it. It is one of my special interests. Much of the enjoyment is the planning. I research seats on the airplane. I learn as much about the airport as I can. I research hotels, restaurants, everything! I love it now that there is so much information available on line. I'll even review menus on line and make my selection days before going to a restaurant. Early is the key for me to avoid anxiety. If I have an early flight, I always stay at a hotel close to the airport... the one I use is a couple hours drive. It is also less stressful to get through security in the early morning. I like to get to the gate at least one hour before boarding time.
I think travel wouldn't be as stressful if I didn't have two autistic kids plus my own autism to deal with. I like going other places but we all have different sensory needs and it can get complicated! Lol.
oh my god i feel all of this so much!! um also autistic and adhd and have multi sensory aphantasia what are the odds?? i totally do the food safety behaviors too big time, i have my routine stuff i eat every day and my safe foods, i get SO stressed if i have to deviate from them but i also like trying new things! its a weird juxtaposition. im also the same w always being early to have a buffer and needing a gps and stuff XD i get so anxious about deviating from my usual routes that i had a panic attack seeing my new psychiatrist for the first time and he was literally 250 meters past where id previously travelled into the city lol it was so terrifying! ive always called it agoraphobia? i have my regular supermarket, regular pharmacy, doctor, my workplace, and home - anything outside of that causes me extreme anxiety even if i want to go there ?? lol its very comforting to find someone who has the same experiences as me with this stuff! youre amazing for doing things despite the anxiety, its so exhausting to always be fighting your fears 💖 thank u for this video, i could literally talk forever rn about how much i get everything you talked about lol im sorry you experience it too but thank you for making this! :3 (edit: my fiance is SO chill compared to me and my obsessive list making and planning stresses him out haha its such a tricky thing for us to both be comfortable in Situations lol)
I have met a couple other people with my laundry list of diagnoses! I think algorithms help us find each other! I actually almost got diagnosed agoraphobia 🤔 but he took it off during the evaluation because I do like going places. But yes, I really don't like going Anywhere new, especially by myself.
My biggest problem is having a comfortable bed. I prefer staying home. I also live in a touristic area 🙃 many nice places. Rüdesheim am Rhein, near my City, is pretty popular.
im a big snack packer. i take food and drinks everywhere. i also have my most needed comforts - lip balm, ear plugs, tissues, sunglasses, hat, phone/camera, tissues, hand wipe and a plastic bag in case i find wild berries or something i want to bring home. ive never traveled alone and i dont drive to far from home. i used to venture to the city with a companion, but i think im done with that. do what you need to do to keep yourselves comfortable and dont cave to neurotypical or cultural standards.
Gosh this is interesting - I keep having Hypo's when I am out on a saturday morning after coffee - its really awful. Travelling for me is all but impossible these days due to so many different anxieties
As I was driving into Seattle earlier this afternoon, my kids told each other, "okay let's be quiet this is where mom starts to get panick-y." Downtown driving makes me SO anxious. 😔
Does the environment of an airplane like the confind space, having to sit on a seat for hous hours and, having so many people around. Apart from the limited food variety available, bother you?
Yes, I don't like the small space and sitting in those horrible chairs make me so antsy, I can't sit still and rarely sit in a chair "normally" but airplane chairs don't give much room for wiggling. I also bring a lot of snacks because I get anxious if I don't have foods I like available.
I am so glad you made this video. I was offered the chance to see some people very important to me who I haven’t been able to afford to visit for over a decade - and I realized that with not being able to afford to travel for so long, while also getting progressively more disabled due to stress and trauma, even considering the idea of taking a flight feels like too much for me. Understanding more about my own sensory issues and having had bad experiences in the past, it just feels like an insurmountable thing - and that’s before the difficulty of being somewhere I can’t easily leave if I need to, and trying to socialize (which I do really love to do, but it also takes so much out of me.) So far what’s helped has been talking with my husband about it. He offered to go with me, and I’ve also started considering finding some things in the area related to my special interests. That way, instead of just a lot of stressful things, there’ll be at least one really easy thing that will help balance stuff out.
So now the trip feels possible, but still really stressful. To help with that, I’m gonna do some prep work & visual aids related to things involved with the flight.
One of my big issues is that earlier in my adult life, an airline assigned someone to take me from a gate I arrived at to the gate for my next flight. No one had told me this - and I was the one who booked and paid for the flight. I do not have a formal diagnosis even now, so I don’t know why this was done. Anyway, I was told to follow the person but not why, and they wouldn’t respond to me asking where we were going and why. They were carrying a fast food bag, so I suspect they were supposed to be on their lunch break and were frustrated - but as I was a young adult on my own in a strange airport, it was a really stressful experience. It was also very dehumanizing due to no one at any time bothering to explain anything to me; and at that point in my life, I did take flights regularly enough that I knew how to find my gate for connecting flights, finding the proper luggage claim, etc. And after years of seeing reports of abuses by airlines, and also the anti-trans stuff from the TSA, I would find such an experience way more frightening and concerning.
I always like the idea of travel but it really does stress me out. I've rarely traveled by myself. The story at the end was weird, I wonder why that person was assigned, maybe you were the only passanger with that connecting flight? It is also possible they didn't speak English? I have a friend who is completely blind and gets help between gates. Her assistant is often someone who doesn't speak English and with her being blind it can be scary when they don't talk to her or reassure her they are taking her to the right gate. She quite literally is following them blind.
I’ve been learning about and experimenting with stims - like noticing what things I end up doing anyway & trying to make a point of doing them when I’m not anxious just to kind of regulate throughout the day. So far, when I’m not in bed or another place with stim toys or materials, I shake my fists like you do. It’s super helpful, and so easy to do.
Yes. I get so stressed cause everything changes, my routine, my things , my food, maybe I dont like the bed, maybe there is sounds so I cannot sleep etc etc. Last year we were at a trip with another family and I had a meltdown an we had to drive home from that country right away. At home I was to tired to even function, I could barely eat. So exhausted from all this and socializing for 3 days in a row.
You've blown my mind! This all sounds too familiar. I've had crippling food (this used to be my #1 anxiety and is very similar to your experience) & travel anxiety for most of my life, and up until this very moment, I thought it was something I could fix through therapy and medication...it never once occurred to me that this is simply the way I'm wired! I only discovered I was autistic two years ago, so I'm looking forward to having more huge realizations for the next little while 😂
It's beautiful to me that you still go on trips despite your travel anxiety. If it's anything like my own experience....it's just a lot to ask of our system. I also love learning and discovering and seeing new places, but for my whole life, my anxiety has made it so that I tend to stay home. Worse still, the chronic pain I developed over the last 8 years has made it so that I haven't been on a single trip since my pain started. I tried a few times, but then my condition would flare up and I would have to cancel every time, and admittedly, because of my travel anxiety, I remember feeling more relief than sadness. Pain makes everything so much more complicated. It's like my food anxiety x10 (do I have all my meds, is the car seat comfortable, will there be a place to lie down if I need it, the list is endless). So, for now, I'm using travel youtube to get even just a taste of some travel :)
And hey, sometimes the food anxiety saves everyone's butts. I got stuck with my parents in an 8 hour stand-still traffic jam in a snow storm, and I had packed enough food and water to get through it no problem 😅
Everyone teases me that I pack too many snacks until I start doling them out and then they are happy! Lol.
hi i´m autistic and let me tell you, that i like your videos and oposing of what you may think of yourself you are not in any means boring when you´re speaking on the videos in my point of view i can actually relate to what you have said in one ocasion about being yourself even if you need to talk for longer in the videos do it if it feels necessary to you. and about traveling i almost passed out on aeroport because of anxiety ...i think it was because of all comotion, noises people etc.. but fortunatly it ended up ok i catch my flight. keep the great work. 🙂
Thank you so much! I know we shouldn't compare, but it's hard not to and I know a lot of TH-camrs have a much faster pace flashy style. Airports are so very overwhelming for me!!!
Some people on the spectrum avoid travel. I enjoy it. It is one of my special interests. Much of the enjoyment is the planning. I research seats on the airplane. I learn as much about the airport as I can. I research hotels, restaurants, everything! I love it now that there is so much information available on line. I'll even review menus on line and make my selection days before going to a restaurant. Early is the key for me to avoid anxiety. If I have an early flight, I always stay at a hotel close to the airport... the one I use is a couple hours drive. It is also less stressful to get through security in the early morning. I like to get to the gate at least one hour before boarding time.
I think travel wouldn't be as stressful if I didn't have two autistic kids plus my own autism to deal with. I like going other places but we all have different sensory needs and it can get complicated! Lol.
oh my god i feel all of this so much!! um also autistic and adhd and have multi sensory aphantasia what are the odds?? i totally do the food safety behaviors too big time, i have my routine stuff i eat every day and my safe foods, i get SO stressed if i have to deviate from them but i also like trying new things! its a weird juxtaposition. im also the same w always being early to have a buffer and needing a gps and stuff XD i get so anxious about deviating from my usual routes that i had a panic attack seeing my new psychiatrist for the first time and he was literally 250 meters past where id previously travelled into the city lol it was so terrifying! ive always called it agoraphobia? i have my regular supermarket, regular pharmacy, doctor, my workplace, and home - anything outside of that causes me extreme anxiety even if i want to go there ?? lol its very comforting to find someone who has the same experiences as me with this stuff! youre amazing for doing things despite the anxiety, its so exhausting to always be fighting your fears 💖 thank u for this video, i could literally talk forever rn about how much i get everything you talked about lol im sorry you experience it too but thank you for making this! :3 (edit: my fiance is SO chill compared to me and my obsessive list making and planning stresses him out haha its such a tricky thing for us to both be comfortable in Situations lol)
I have met a couple other people with my laundry list of diagnoses! I think algorithms help us find each other! I actually almost got diagnosed agoraphobia 🤔 but he took it off during the evaluation because I do like going places. But yes, I really don't like going Anywhere new, especially by myself.
My biggest problem is having a comfortable bed. I prefer staying home. I also live in a touristic area 🙃 many nice places. Rüdesheim am Rhein, near my City, is pretty popular.
im a big snack packer. i take food and drinks everywhere. i also have my most needed comforts - lip balm, ear plugs, tissues, sunglasses, hat, phone/camera, tissues, hand wipe and a plastic bag in case i find wild berries or something i want to bring home. ive never traveled alone and i dont drive to far from home. i used to venture to the city with a companion, but i think im done with that. do what you need to do to keep yourselves comfortable and dont cave to neurotypical or cultural standards.
Gosh this is interesting - I keep having Hypo's when I am out on a saturday morning after coffee - its really awful. Travelling for me is all but impossible these days due to so many different anxieties
As I was driving into Seattle earlier this afternoon, my kids told each other, "okay let's be quiet this is where mom starts to get panick-y." Downtown driving makes me SO anxious. 😔
Does the environment of an airplane like the confind space, having to sit on a seat for hous hours and, having so many people around. Apart from the limited food variety available, bother you?
Yes, I don't like the small space and sitting in those horrible chairs make me so antsy, I can't sit still and rarely sit in a chair "normally" but airplane chairs don't give much room for wiggling. I also bring a lot of snacks because I get anxious if I don't have foods I like available.