Watch This To Get Over Someone Completely
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.ย. 2024
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the fact that this topic is starting to not resonate with you, IS SUCHA POWERFUL THINGG. we are so proud of u for moving tf onn. thank you for giving us a this series & letting us feel like we had a best friend who knew what we were going thru. thank you for being REAL & reminding us of our worth
Love you!
One of the biggest "recovery" and "restart" REQUIREMENT after heartbreak, especially after a long relationship heartbreak, is the "Replacement" partner. Without this, you can never truly heal completely. Some heartbreaks takes years or even decades to heal completely. A person will always go through relapses unless a true "Replacement" is found. When you start obsessing more about the new partner than the old, this is the true healing from past heartbreaks. No matter how independent you think you can be, or how deep you can bury your pain, the missing puzzle need to be replaced, and DO NOT compare the replacement with the old partner.
Had a baby with him. He left and started talking to another girl 2 days later 🙃 still got to see him for the sake of our son. Ouch 😂
❤❤
@@bethanyedwards8855this is similar to my situation right now I have just split with babies dad we have a 1 year old and we split a day before my birthday which was in December just before Christmas It’s been the hardest thing I’ve ever went through an he seems happy to be a single part time dad I think he’s met someone already it’s only been a month he tried to move on quickly followed a lot of younger girls
"Never make someone your priority when you are just their option" This quote hit deep and really helped me out
That's the most basic bitch quote ever besides "Live Laugh Love!" and "Carpe Diem!". Are you 13?
Amen!
Yes
Why? Maybe ur partner cannot make u a priority due to past traumas… I would take her back if she texts me again 💔💔💔💔
Been there done that and got the tshirt 💔
When he decided he didn't want to be with me eventually I realized I was better off without him and grateful to him for letting me discover that. Without them leaving you, would never discover that you're better off without them.
Agreed
YES, I am just realizing that now, and am grateful to her for letting me go. I actually believe that she helped me by leaving even though it was a ugly break up and its only early stages.
Thanks I am struggling with that appreciate this advise
I've just started to feel exactly the same
My boyfriend dumped me and blocked me from everything 4 days ago. I feel disposable.
This is so relatable. That “you can distract yourself all you want, but once you catch yourself alone when you get home you will feel like shit and die back again” is so true.
It’s been 6 months and I still cry occasionally. I believe I’ll eventually HEAL. ❤
It actually only gets better from here
How have you been honestly?
@@paulina.28 been one year now, still miss that person but I am in a better place ❤
same haha
Trust me you will.... Or even if you don't someday you will thank yourself that you didn't give up or never looked back honestly the only regret I have is I went to that person again and after complete year nothing has changed... Everything is same as it was and I'm still crying and asking myself why I gave up moving on and went to him again...this is just never ending pain I'm going through and idk when is this gonna end
Heartbreak can break you, or make you. Let the pain come, let it wash over you. It will change you, and change you for the better. Trust me. You'll learn about love, about yourself, about life.
2months in and I realize he’s making a conscious decision everyday to not talk to me and not fix things with me so I’m doing same
I broke it off with him due to being continually disrespected and hurt by him over and over. It was an endless emotional roller coaster. It doesn't only have to be the person getting dumped. I was the dumper and I'm going through all of the pain so very much. It's been hell for me. Still is. I have to let him go as I know he'll never change. I can't go back to someone like that. I hope he'll realize it someday that he had a really good partner who did everything for him but he kept on doing things to hurt me.
Hi
My case is similar. How are you doing now?
@@eli_sonj Hi and you how are you feeling now ?
I guess, people can always change, why do u say that he will never change? (Im living the same situation but I'm the dumped one and there were some problem on both sides)
I feel like crap
@@alessandrochinelli2759 I agree with you, people can change but you do not have to make them change. If he constantly tells you "I will change trust me" but he keeps repeating the same thing over again, he's just manipulating you. I was in this case with my ex boyfriend. i had a strong belief that he will change bc he did some efforts for 3 days but then...
when she said "This person had no problem talking to you for 3 months, while you were struggling" and i felt that
Wow did her ex BLOW IT 🤦🏼♂️
Also guys, she is 100% right. I went through my experience in 2021 and as painful as it was, it was also a life changing experience and made me such a more confident and healthy person. I remember reading a similar comment to this back when I was watching Lumma’s original breakup video. I was devastated and feeling broken beyond repair and I read someone say “she’s right. Trust and have faith that time will heal this and if you do the work, it can become something you grow from and makes you better”. That commenter was right. So even if one person sees this, I hope you will remember this comment when you’re going through the worst of it. Some day it will be you coming back here to thank this thoughtful young woman and leave your own story of growth and progress. Thank you Lumma! Hang in there guys and have faith in your own ability to come out the other side so much stronger and happier.
I cant wait to leave my own story
@@wearecapable1067 tag me when you do. I look forward to it.
Can I ask what is "The work"
@@MsFerid567improving yourself in the areas that led to the breakup
@@wearecapable1067 Hi did you leave your own now ?
I love the message of no contact being about healing yourself and not about making them miss you… all the videos about no contact are always about making them miss you and get them back, but thats scary because it sets us up for false hope. So thank you!
and that's kinda manipulative... like, why would you keep silent just to make someone reach out to you
I watched this video back in September when we we’re officially over and my mind was everywhere. I had no idea in my mind what direction to go and all I knew to do was pray. I allowed myself to feel, to vent to cry, whatever I needed to do. I listened to this video literally on repeat and I’ll say today and for a few months now, I’m healed and I’m OVER it🥲🙏🏽🙌🏽 This video was a blessing❤️
How long was it until you stopped crying?
have you stopped crying and are you over the person? @@got7_is_life_and_love_jack474
I watched your first breakup video when I was just freshly broken up with my ex that I dated for 4 years. Now it’s 9 months post breakup, watching this video I can now confidently say that everything you said is true. Each day gets better, it definitely won’t happen overnight, but it will. I am not 100% healed yet but Ik I will be in just a few months, it’s not an easy process. Anyone going through breakup currently… you will get through this, trust me :))))
It has been a year and a half since by boyfriend of five and a half years broke up with me and I can promise you that you will come out strong at the end of this. Cry if you need to cry, try new things that you haven't made time for, pick up old hobbies, and spend time with family and friends. I still cried every once in a while at 6-9 months after the breakup but I began to realize that I missed them as a friend more than a partner. And they were the person I thought I'd marry. Someone I forgave time and time again. One day I woke up and didn't want them anymore, at least not the way I initially pictured.
@desiboi2559 Are you feeling better>
I’m scared because we are going on our 4th year in 2024, it’s been very rocky since pretty early on, we are each other’s first love and i can’t imagine to live without him. I’m so unhappy, i cried so much in the last years to compare to him, but i don’t think i could find better. I don’t even wanr someone else. I wish he or I would change so it works. I’m broken because i based my life around him, as many bpd people do.. it’s a pain i can’t tolerate
@@WellKnownBee I used to be the same way, always crying because he didn’t treat me right. Yes you grow attached, but at the end of the day you have to put your own happiness first and break up. Especially if you know you are rocky and aren’t happy. It’s been two years now since I broke up with my first love for 4 years together and I have a new man now who treats me sooooo amazing. I never looked back since… f the other one 😂 I wish you the best of luck 🫶🏽
@desiboi2559hi how did it go on 3rd week my girlfriend of 2 years suddenly left biggest shock of my life i am currently just extremely depressed i hope with time it’ll improve.
Great video.
As someone who initiated the breakup and eventually broke up, I'd like to address that it's also difficult for us, the ones who broke up. Sometimes you gotta break up for your own mental health, and sometimes breaking up is the only solution.
If anyone is seeing this and knows what I am talking about, I understand what you're going through.
I've gone through a betrayal and gave her a second chance, only realising later on that I'm suffering too much because of it.
Though it's still very tough to move on.
Good luck
thank you, man, I needed this comment. i spent a lot of time feeling like a villan even though i know what i did ws best
@Cristofer Clay Thanks for this. 🥺🥺 this is so timely.
Thats exactly my experience. I see it more like him ending it tho cuz he was doing things I told him I would need to leave if he did. And he did them many times anyways. So I needed to leave he pushed me to, I didn't just leave cuz I wanted too yannow? It's kinda like that :/
This is true. Im the one who initiated the break up as well but it hurts like hell. You know that its for the best but still hurts. Part of me would like to talk to him again but that doesnt feel right. I hope ill get better soon. This video helps me alot specially with my panic attacks at night. Its been almost a week since the break up. And i hope i can make it til the end❤
Thank you so much. I always feel so guilty. Everyone only talks about being left, and never having to leave. My ex tried to take his life after I left for mental health reasons and his friends blamed me. It is so draining and hurtful to have the person you thought would always care for you just immediately glare you down, thinking I was the person to blame for his depression. It’s so conflicting and it’s not helpful hearing people say that right person wrong time isn’t a thing, because it is. I love him and I want him to be happy, but he isn’t in a good place mentally and out lives are too stressful right now.
Can confirm… that she’s right… while I still have my days (I’m 5 months post breakup)… it on occasion hurts and I can spiral into the “why was I not good enough”.. but most days he doesn’t cross my mind like he used to. And in the last few weeks I’ve initiated no contact because trying to be friends was hurting me and my mental health. Taking time off from not talking to my ex, helped me realize that I really didn’t want him in my life anymore and he was causing me more pain then happiness. Keep fighting for yourself and loving yourself. Always put yourself first. Find who you are. It will get better.
Me too. 3 weeks ago blocked and deleted him finally, after a year of being "friends". But really, it was just me holding on and being too scared to break the addiction, and him not having the guts to let me go properly. It was causing so much pain and damage to me. The high of talking to him versus the horrible lows of hearing things I didn't want to hear (about other women etc.), torture! No contact has helped immensely to start putting him firmly in the past. We've got this.
@@Ginmabes I love this ❤️❤️ I’m proud of you. Proud of us. We got this for sure!!
yes!! I also realized I needed to go no contact a few months ago (after trying to remain friends with him, thinking i could handle it). It was causing me so much more pain to be "friends" with him but not actually be "with" him. Since I've gone no contact, I also realized that I don't "need" him in my life in the way that I once thought. It feels so freeing!!
How are you now?
@@joanncastillo837 I just hit a year last month.. I feel better than ever. I finally felt ready to date again and even reconnected with a long time friend and we’re now happily together!! I never thought I’d move on. I will always hold a special place in my heart for my ex, but I’m actually grateful he left because I don’t think I’d have had the strength to do it myself.. and in doing so he gave me the gift of finding my true self and finding real love! ❤️
The way your ex ends things really determines if there is any remaining possibility of getting back together. Packing up without warning and breaking up with you over text is one of the worst ways to leave someone. Lumma I’m so glad you realized your worth and you’re so much off better without him. If you do leave someone, sit down with them and have a mature conversation about why things didn’t work out. If over time you guys grow into better people and the feelings are still there, then getting back together as a stronger couple is still very possible. Always handle a breakup like an adult and if you still love them, don’t slam all doors shut by throwing them at the bottom of the ditch
It seems good but listening the reasons is painful!! They have lot of misconceptions of us misunderstanding..in that moment they r not even mood to listen or work out… it leaves us thinking bland ourselves!!!! So I think not telling the reason is good for us.. anyone leaving has thier own opinions.. nothing related to us
If you have 0 self esteem, then yes, it might take you from 3 to 6 months to get over someone. And experience all of these hard moments and all the trauma, but the moment you start looking for your lost self esteem, learning how to value yourself, understanding your mistakes, you are instantly gonna feel some relief. It's not months that you need, it's self value. Self value and worth come from realizing where you've devalued yourself. You always have a choice if you want a person who is hurting you and breaking the relationship, or picking yourself up and finding somebody who is giving you what you need.
I'm learning to love myself by trying gratitudes journal. thank you for your comment, it's so insightful
@@happycreature3993 It's okay, thank you so much! I was also learning and healing at that time. A gratitude journal is an awesome idea. I suggest creating a vision board with your dream life as well. When we lose ourselves in an unhealthy situation, we forget our value, but it's the most important thing. Sending hugs!
I remember watching the first video back in May when my husband of 8 years left me for another woman. I remember hearing you talking to me (it felt like you were talking to me lol) and reassuring me that it will be ok. I thought there is no way I will not feel this pain. Fast forward to August, I am finally out of the woodwork though I still have sudden episodes of losing it but way less than I used to and I'm actually excited about the future. Thank you so much Lumma!
I’m ridiculously happy for u and proud of ur progress🥹❤️ Ur doing great! Keep it up!! I’m hoping u live an amazing life despite the rough patch
This is so comforting. My partner of 8 years, my first love and what I thought was my future randomly decided to end it 3 days ago. I just want the pain, thoughts & heartbreak to stop. Everyone keeps saying in time you’ll realise that life will be even better, but right now I don’t find joy in anything and I can’t see myself ever being happy/not in pain again. I really hope it does get better..
@@miaperezdiaz8393 they are right, but it does takes time getting over.
Been 5 months more , how are you now, lovely?
@@miaperezdiaz8393 how are you doing now? 😢❤
After 3 months I feel much better I use to feel like I am dying it will never gonna be okay and I am looking forward for my further healing and also I feel like I
haven't done anything it's just get healed in it's own way
Thank you 💜
It hits different when you both really love each other but break up because there is a personality mismatch.
I feel you there, especially when you know you still deeply care about each other but just can’t be together…
To anyone who is going through this pain right now. Just remember, Pain makes you stronger. Tears make you braver. Heartbreaks make you wiser. The pain will go away and you will thank the person one day for giving you this pain. Because without this pain you will never realise how beautiful your soul is. I heal each day bit by bit and Thank you so much Lumma for making these videos. They have been the pillars of my strength and have given me so much support.
Thank you so much for your videos on this. They have helped me more than you can imagine. I’m in week 3 after my ex broke up with me after a 6 year relationship. I’m still crushed and cry every day but watching your videos and reading the other comments here have given me hope that I too will get through this and be happy again one day.
To everyone else watching/commenting/reading the comments, we will get through this and when we look back at these comments in the future, we will be able to see how strong we are and how much we’ve grown and overcome.
Hey! Let me know if you need help in this area. I teach women how to bounce back after heartbreak with confidence in a group setting. This is my expertise after bouncing back from a 19 year relationship that ended last year. Sending love your way!
Hey girl I know how you feel. I was 6 years in too, I’m a little over month 2, and he didn’t reach out for my birthday. I can’t help but hope he’ll reach out. But it’s so painful and draining. I just discovered her videos.
I’m on day 1 after 7 yrs. One painful day at a time
@@shatiyamacon8564 help please.. I’m on this situation right now. 😞
1 day at a time , it will get easier and you will heal ❤️
I addressed my flaws and worked on myself for a YEAR. No contact until I texted him 1 year later, and found that he did no healing.....I deserve so much better.
My formula is no contact for a year, and if you are still obsessed with him, text him after a year and realize how he makes you feel now. That shows you the truth.
I was going THROUGH IT at the beginning of this year. I decided to officially end things with him because he was never emotionally there for me and we were very toxic for each other, but we did share many beautiful moments together. It wasnt until I realized how dependent on him i was when i decided to leave him. And that’s when I came across your video. Your breakup video helped me so fucking much because it made me feel Im not alone, and that’s what I really needed. It helped me feel stronger and your words made me feel independent. Thank you Lumma for dedicating this series for us. 7 months later to today, I no longer feel the need to see him anymore. My ex now feels like a part of my past, something I learned from, and I can move on from. I no longer miss him, just the memories of him. But that’s okay because i know God has someone out there for me who’s working on himself, who’s going to be a good man who loves me. And im here becoming stronger and trying to become the person I want to be as well. We just have to be patient and trust in the process. It was fucking painful, soo fucking painful at the beginning. But now, i feel okay :) and it’s thanks to Lumma who really helped me feel validated and not alone. Thank you Lumma, and just like you I no longer feel i need there breakup videos. I never thought i’d get to this place, but now im looking forward to my future, with someone new who i can love with all my heart…
How long did it take you to feel better? I feel like it's a faster process for the one leaving. You likely mentally prepared for it ahead of time
@@dbarbour1982 I think it’s a similar timeline but the person who initiates the breakup usually is grieving the relationship before it’s officially over so it looks like it’s easier for them when they are actually just further on the path towards acceptance.
The fact our stories are same makes me feel good there's someone out there who can make me feel better
@@kalashpandey315 same! I’m so glad I’m not alone, I can completely relate. I wish both of you so much healing ❤
My relationship looks like the bits you just shared about yours. I’m not doing well.
cant really move on from my ex. i broke up with him because he's just doing the bare minimum, giving me the least effort. We were ldr couple and it makes me sad thinking that I might not be able to see him ever again. :(
I ended the relationship bec I know he no longer loves me. He just wants me because he said im a "wife material", but he's not giving any effort or what. it's always me doing things for our relationship to work.
Girl you are wife material just for a different husband
I was ghosted about a week ago and I’m so heartbroken over it all. Your transparency and advice is definitely helping me more than you know. Thank you💕
Stay strong! I'm on a similar boat :))
Me too ❤ it sucks 🚫👻🚫
Immature childish men.
In the same boat but concentrating on my health.
It gets better promise !
I've been blocked everywhere for two months without a specific and true reason.. it hurts a lot.. and my mother and cousin were not blocked and she regularly likes all the posts on Facebook from my Mother.. crazy..
Quick advice for you guys : every person we encounter in our lives ignites a dream and hope in us , and that’s good that’s healthy that’s indicative that you’re capable to provide love ! The most precious emotion ! What we need to acknowledge to ease that pain is to keep the dream keep the positive hope of love , but change the person. Once you come down to this contentment it will no longer matter to you who leaves and who sticks around to the end.
I broke up with my ex last year in December, because she kept putting so much pressure on me with her problems. I told her that I just wanted to work on myself, because I felt that I was losing myself and maybe she can work on herself too. She agreed to it that she was gonna seek help then a month later she found someone else. This year has just been working on myself. 230 to 180 pounds and I’m gonna keep going. As for her I hope for the best.
Crazy cause I found this channel when you were getting out of your relationship and here we are. Thank you for your help.
How are you now?
Thank u! When she said “when u get a minute to yourself, you are going to cry” that was like the realist shit I ever heard on youtube. Cause I stay busy but when my head hits that pillow I cant help but to cry and feel sad
To all of you going through a breakup (like me) not one step back! it's normal to feel anxiety and have intrusive thoughts about your ex, but it's an enormous opportunity to work on a better version of yourself and eventually meet someone better.
Oh my god the anxiety i feel in my stomach is so bad that i barely can even sleep
@@sohaliyasewbarran1469So sorry about that. I understand your situation. It will get better. I was in the same situation now too.
@@sohaliyasewbarran1469 i’m going through that right now. i fall asleep, wake up at 3 am, then can’t fall back asleep. its torture.
I did not truly get over breakups until years later. It requires therapy and digging to the roots of your wounds. Your problems that circle you are you, and you can fix them… not just cry about them ❣️
This video is too legit. No '5 minutes' solutions, no tricks, only life experiences... Hope we'll get over this situation one day...
Man I’ve just wanted to say, this shits been hard, and even with these videos to help out, I still feel hopeless and weak.
I’ve been going through this “breakup” for a little more than 2 months. The problem is this breakup is taking place during possibly the lowest point of my life. But at the same time Ive been at this low point for a while, even when we were talking.
But my current problem is that I’ve had no motivation during the whole thing. I feel motionless. And with everything I’ve been going through, it’s hard to keep a positive thought about life.
I also have school starting up, so it’s gonna be hard to ignore her and try to stay away.
I feel like I’m in purgatory. Just waiting for something to happen. Good or bad.
But writing this whole thing made me feel a lot better.
And y’all don’t need to feel pity towards me, I’m just using this as therapy, and maybe someone can relate to what I’m feeling.
But I promise y’all I’ll keep working through this.
I can relate. Thanks for this. It helps to know that I'm not the only one feeling motionless. I'm setting up my first therapy appointment today so I'm hoping that'll help me start moving forward again. I think the motionlessness for me is the fear of accepting that I'll have no ties to this person anymore. Anyways, good luck to you, we got this.
I don’t feel pity towards you. I can relate in some way. You’ll get through this.
I don't feel pity for you at all, I see a genuine person who is going through the motions of a break up. May God bless and protect you and that you know there is so much light out there for you, Thank you for sharing this 😊
i relate. thank you commenting
I know it is painful but please do give yourself that time. Don't ignore and neglect yourself. Think of that little girl inside of you crying so badly. Comfort her because she is you. Be there for her, don't abandon her tell her she is loved.
This inner child practice truly helped me. i hope you too ❤️
Truth is that after a severe breakup one of the two who suffered big time, is probably so irreparably hurt that even after getting back with their partner things can never be the same for them.
I sent him several paragraphs how I felt... no response. Broke no contact, same behavior. I finally put my foot down yesterday. Still, no response. This is my closure.
Hi sweetheart, how do you feel rn ?
It's been 7 weeks break with him (s)
I can do it, i believe i will get over it, it just the matter of time. I will back to give an update about this healing process, good luck guys! And thanks Lumma you were right, this video helped thousand people in this world that dealing with break up.
its almost been a month for me. any updates?
Any updates??
@@eevasdiaries7401 sorry its been a busy month. I feel happier than ever, that last relationship actually saved me! Im going to have my thesis defense next week. So excited! And yeag Lumma was right, he actually came back, my ex is cameback, he emailed me bcs i blocked all his contact. He texted me and say sorry and offer a new start. But i said no, belive me, you wont feel any feelings towards him anymore until you really really found piece of yourself that missing. I was surprised that i dare enough to say no to get back together. After i say no, he keeps emailed me that he is sorry, it was his fault blablabla, but noo, nopee! Old version of me is not exist anymore. So i keep ignore his email until he got tired. Now i just love being single, i talk to people freely and do whatever i want
@@eevasdiaries7401 hi its been almost two months for me, and i feel better, but every so often i do get a bit sad. i tend to remember that i have friends who make me equally, if not more, happier than he made me. him and i were together for 10 months, so i experienced a lot of my own personal growth with him. its difficult at first, but once you lean on others it helps. with that, its still enabling to become sad, and i do miss him, but he hurt me a lot and wont care to come back.
dont do things that will purposefully make you miss them, do things that make you grateful for yourself
love yourself before loving anyone else
i hope this helps and i hope you feel better - breakups suck
Im going through a heartbreak too and honestly your videos are helping me so much. My boyfriend left me due to his family pressuring him for arranged marriage, i still can't believe that so many people's mind towards love has still not changed. The thought of seeing him with someone else is killing me from inside but at the same time also giving me strength to move on, because i'll be disrespecting myself if i be with someone who cant choose me. The time is extremely tough for sure but there's strong belief that i'll be in a good place with the time. Im a strong believer of destiny, so whatever happens has a reason behind it. Maybe we can't understand that today but one day we will.
The same happened to me... we just have to trust that this pain will go away and better will come...
Waaah! Am undergoing the same incident Currently and it hurts me so much but I will get over it
Going through somethng similar! And I'm really loosing my mind over it. If you want to talk we can.
It's hard not to be able to kiss him again, never to hug or make love again. But what is more difficult than that is knowing that other lips will touch his lips. To think that another woman would touch every part of him that I fell in love with. This is what drives me crazy. and it also kills me that he doesn't care about it, breaks up with me knowing I'll be with other people, and doesn't care. please someone tell me these feelings will end one day
Lumma, I am going through a heartbreak that has cause me relentless pain. The physical pain was rough. My life has changed over night and having someone move on so quickly in a matter of 24 hours. You're videos have helped me through the acceptance phase. Seeing who you are now shows me I can also achieve the same. Thank you for giving me hope in myself.
how are you doing now? i hope all is well
Going through this now, and I’m utterly devastated
Same
Your videos have helped me tremendously with the breakup I’m going through. You give the best advice and have reassured me that I can get through this. Words cant express how thankful I am for you and your channel
Hey! Let me know if you need help in this area. I teach women how to bounce back after heartbreak with confidence in a group setting. This is my expertise after bouncing back from a 19 year relationship that ended last year. Sending love your way!
@@Star-dj9rk Hi Star, I would love to... Here's a link to book a free quick chat with me first.
It’s very important not to blame yourself for the breakup even if it was your fault in some way. It’s something that can prevent you from getting over it for years. In my case I was praying for a second chance that never came. I should have accepted my mistake and moved on. Guilt makes everything worse.
I've been blocked everywhere for two months without a specific and true reason.. it hurts a lot.. and my mother and cousin were not blocked and she regularly likes all the posts on Facebook from my mother...crazy ..
Hey, Lumma the way this video came up is really funny 😊 Because today is the day I also realized I don't want them back. Despite the pain, I just don't wanna be that person anymore, I don't wanna interrupt my healing process. I just wanna be completely DONE.
And thank you for the way this video is edited and told. So calm, so reassuring, so validating. Perfect for a peaceful night to listen to and look back on, ESPECIALLY when you already healing and feeling better. Because it just magnified my positive feelings more. That indeed, I am in the right direction.
You are right, healing is not overnight. Earlier and last night, I still cried. But it's not the gut-wrenching cry anymore. They're more like cry of release instead. Cry of final goodbyes, cry of letting go, cry of surrendering the past to God and asking him to fill your heart instead.
2 months ago I was here listening to your previous video. I was a fucking mess then. Now that I'm feeling better, you are here to help me once again. To validate my journey. Thank You ❤️ You are such a blessing to the broken soul I once was. I owe some of my healing to you.
This is so crazy you literally took the words of how and what i am going thru at this exact moment you just pinpointed all of my feelings and thoughts right now this too is my night of confirmation I love what you said about interrupting the healing process and surrendering the past to God every word in your mesaage just spoke so many volumes right now thank you thank you and thank u sooooooo much for your message..... God Bless ❤️
It’s crazy seeing how people get over their ex of YEARS within 6 months. Reading “yeah he cheated on me after 8 years and I’d say that after 4 months I was fully moved on”….. how do yall do this and I’m STILL thinking every single day about my ex of 2 YEARS AGO who I was with for 6 MONTHS!!!!!
Think that you will meet someone who will love you unconditionally and choose to love yourself! This person doesn't not exist for you, like those people outside who you do not pay attention to.
I was wondering the same..
I just don’t know how somebody can leave you. You are BEAUTIFUL, jesus christ
Watching someone going through things I'm going through and getting over it just gave me hope that I also can get over ... It was my first love I can't explain how it hurts me and the fact that he doesn't give a fuck about me hurts more.. he wants the relationship first and now I'm the one with a broken heart!
I watched this after 6 months of my heartbreak. Today i think it's the first day that im really over.🎉 And then i see ur vdo lol. This very great advice. I believe if it meant to be,it'll be too. and no right person wrong time, just wrong person lol. Thank you❤
I cannot put in to words how helpful these videos have been. I'm 5 weeks in after the most intense heartbreak I've ever felt and these videos are everything that I need right now.
How do you feel today? I’m 6 weeks in and it’s hard 💔
The longest I lasted without communication previously was 17 days. I’m trying again and I’ve made it 18 so far. It’s extremely hard but I agree that it’s the best thing to do and I have started to feel better the last few days, as a result.
The key for me was figuring out how to immediately kick my ex out of my mind, when I start to think about her. You just have to block them out. Don’t get sucked into nostalgia.
Just had a painful ‘out of the blue’ break up yesterday with a man I had a lot of hopes and plans with. Was doubtful about watching this, but honestly this video was so sincere and so motivational, moving and helpful that I felt the need to express my gratitude. Thank you. You helped my broken heart to heal. And that is a lot ❤
On the first stage of my breakup. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for me. Thank you so much bringing light to this topic and bringing reassurance ❤
luma to be honest i just can't thank you enough, for make so many people like us believe that they are not alone going through heartbreak you've helped many to trust themselves , I love you for that !
The sad news is that breakups won't get easy when you are invested and love the person. It's pure addiction to their presence😢
Don't think people realize befire a break up.. How much grief is felt. It's literally like the death of a love. It's important to remember though that if we could find love before, then we can definitely find it again ❤️it's not an impossible task, but take care of yourself first and don't drop your standards
@whatsapphim5301 how disgusting of you to try use hurt and vulnerable people to make money
It’s so crazy that the guy who said the timing was perfect is from Portugal. I’m from Portugal as well and the time was also perfect for me. The world is such a wonderful place and there are so many beautiful people out there. Let the past be past and live in the present so that the future will always be better ☺️
😉
It’s been a month since I broke up w my ex bf. I still cry every week and think about how our relationship could have worked out…But in doing that, I’m actually just imagining him being a totally different person, not the selfish, gaslighter that he was for years.
You don’t want them back once they do. It’s the best feeling ever! 💜
No I really just want to thank you for putting these videos out! It must’ve been hard for you to share something so personal to the internet. You don’t know how much your videos help me to distract myself or feel understood. So thank you very much, it’s time to move onto the next topic :)
I'm so glad they've helped
Just WOW Lumma. Absolute amazing, YOU are amazing. I'm going through a divorce (16yrs marriage/ 24 yrs together) where she just told me 3 weeks ago and its heartbreaking with 2 kids. Of all the countless videos I've seen on breakups and coping, YOU are the Only one who has kept it this real. You are truly a ray of light, truth & optimism. Thank You for helping me to get thru the hardest and darkest part of my life:-) Love you All!
My boyfriend cheated on me last night and been crying all day today. I cried so much that Idek how I feel anymore. Thought this would never happened to my life. Thought my boyfriend would never cheated on me. Idk what to believe or who to trust anymore. But I know that I feel like I lost something but I am actually gaining something for myself. Your video helps me a lot that I can't even describe so thank u.
My ex cheated on me as well. It hurts, but it shows who they truly are. Be glad it happened now and not years down the road. Cheating has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Even if there were problems in the relationship, there is no excuse for cheating. It’s literally one of the most hurtful and destructive things you can do to a person you ostensibly love. Actually, if it was real love then then it wouldn’t have happened. Again, he showed his true colors. Be glad he did. You’re closer to the truth now.
@@Dialogos1989 thank you for your message. You’re absolutely right. If he was my soulmate he would’ve never cheated on me. Still feel depressed and empty but I know I will get through this and become happier than ever. Thank you 😌
“He couldn’t pay me to be sad”. Love that. Anyway, you’re far too beautiful to regret a breakup.
As a 41 year old divorce dad dealing with this same situation it doesn’t get easier but the tools become more plentiful for you. Thank you for your videos! And to all out there struggling, just know your not alone ❤
I don’t know if you see these comments anymore but been going through it this week and your videos help a lot .
I have been watching soo many videos made by professionals and none of them helped me. I been separated for 3 weeks & I found myself breaking no contacting & starting it again & listening to the false hope. This is truly what I needed to hear right here. Watching your 2 videos on breakups made me instantly feel like some weight lifted off of me because you are being real. Everything you are saying is the brutal reality of what really happens after a breakup. I’m so glad I found you.
Hey! Let me know if you need help in this area. I teach women how to bounce back after heartbreak with confidence in a group setting. This is my expertise after bouncing back from a 19 year relationship that ended last year. Sending love your way!
For real this is exactly how I feel
Hey. How are you doing now!
Its been 2 months. What you went through is what im going through right now. I keep blaming myself for the failure. But when I hear you say “its a beautiful thing that you have a heart so big that you love this person so much” make me realize how much love i gave to them, more than I can even imagine that I could have this much love to give. It change my perspective from “how can I fix this” to “its okay you did well”. And it make me beginning to feel i should let go of her so I can ready for something new that i am deserved. Your break up video speed up my healing process. Thank you ❤
Watching in 2024 and feeling like i just made a new best friend. You are so heavily underrated. I needed this so much during this season in my life. You instantly filled me with hope of being ok. I've watched a ton of "healing heart break" videos, but the ones from this channel are the first to really touch my soul and give me peace. God brought all of this here for a much higher purpose...to help those in need. Thank you ❤
The most important rule, Love God first then yourself. Not any human should be before God.
With every of my heartbreak and I had them 3, I cried with each of them for 3 days all day long. On the 4th day I woke up like nothing happened. I thanked myself so much for this, that I have such a gift of forgetting people who hurt me, so fast.
But that 3 days were so painful I didn’t think I will make it through.
The first heartbreak always hurts the most because it’s a new feeling.
The stronger love with passion will come later.
And you will look back at that person, and question yourself how you could even fall in love with them.
Guys, it hurts, but there are benefits of being heartbroken, It makes you so much stronger, better, and smarter.
It seems like the first love will hurt forever, not even close, it won’t.
After I stopped thinking of them, all of them came back asking to get back together. The thing is, you already don’t love and don’t care about them at that point.
Love God first, then yourself, then whoever comes next.
I didn’t regret any of my relationships especially my newly breakup relationship… but there’s one thing I regret is I keep on denying that I am okay and moved from the breakup but once certain reality hits me I broke down so hard and that pain perpetually there for months (in worst case it lasted for over nearly two years)… However, what I actually should have done in early stage of breakup was to acknowledge it and let myself felt all the pain and be real with it so I could heal completely faster.
Oh! I felt this before with my first breakup. I jumped to a new person immediately without giving myself a time to heal and one day everything hits me hard. It's okay if you feel things too late. You will be okay later. Better late than never!
You’re my therapist. My healer. My support. My hope. Thankyou so much. You’re doing such an amazing thing for so many people including me. Yes I do believe I will get over him in a year. Only because of you! 💗
I will begin my first therapy session and also apply those things in my life and will definitely get back to this comment after a year. Hopefully things will get better for me. I want to read this comment later and realise what I wrote actually came true and that would be the biggest miracle of life.
Hi I am an only child and every time when i watch ur videos, you feel like a sister to me so I just wanna say thank u a lot for making these vids❤
I always revisit your pep talks when I need them and ALWAYS feel so much lighter and happier afterwards✨ I’m exactly where I’m meant to be
Break ups suck, but once you overcome the pain, you become so much stronger. It helps your soul grow and mature more. Love the video, young lady God Bless You
It's been four years since my divorce and I haven't even so much as flirted with another woman. I've been focused on my kids, work, my health and fitness, business opportunities, and now I feel so much time has passed I've lost that spark and I'm terrified to start dating again. It sounds stupid but I feel women can tell I've been out of the game so long I'm either a joke or a 'project.' Anyways, this was a really good video. Gave me some things to think about. Thank you!
I reacently had my worst hearbreak...1 months ago my gf left me...
Thank you soo much...your words your videos are really healing me ..💙
me and my ex broke up back in April and the only thing that got me through the first month or so was breakup advice videos and yours was so genuine and realistic compared to some of the others. I’m now 5 months post breakup and I still find myself crying to sleep on occasion but I’m in a much better place than I was 5 months ago. I’m so grateful you chose to upload that document of your breakup bc your friend was right, it has helped a lot of people!
That is the most accurate description ever, I feel like I am mourning the life of him even tho he is alive, it definitely is like losing a loved one. Thank you for these amazing videos.
Hey! I teach women in my private group to heal from heartbreak like a boss just as I did when that 19 year relationship ended last year, let me know if you're interested in details. Sending love your way!
I was the one who left him but after putting up with a lot,until there was that last drop. But I did send a last message explaining him why I took this decision. Then I blocked him everywhere, on my phone, social media, but he could still email me to really appologise for all he did to make me be so radical in my decision and he did not, so...I feel I am healing day by day. Thank you for your video, it really helps. ❤
I'm been watching so many breakup videos on TH-cam and i got to say only you and Matthew Hussey have given me so much strength to move on. The only difference between you and Matthew Hussey is that your advice is so raw. It's coming from your very own experience and I'm truly so thankful for your videos
🔝🔝🔝 thanks for your love and support.please kindly send a message to my official telegram above🔝🔝
Hey Lumma
Thank you for this video.
I wrote a comment to you after watching your 3 month video diaries. It helped me so much.
I am 61 and was married. We were together for 4-1/2 years. What I can say to all of you reading this, is give yourselves the biggest gift and DEAL WITH YOUR EMOTIONS. Do not turn away and run the other way or get yourself into rebound stuff. For the first time in my life, after different relationships and being married before, I am FINALLY looking at myself and what I need to heal. I am dealing with stuff no matter how painful. The earlier you deal with these things, the better you will know your authentic selves. Don't put it off! The older you get, the harder it is. Take it from someone who is dealing with this first hand. Me! 🙏💗
I can't begin to tell you how much your videos have helped me. Specially where you talk about different stages. For the longest I kept on keeping hope which was my biggest mistake. I still cry sometimes. The man i was supposed to marry got engaged just 7 months post our break-up.
Hey! I teach women in my private group to heal from heartbreak like a boss just as I did when that 19 year relationship ended last year, let me know if you're interested in details. Sending love your way!
update?
This Breakup has gone on for 2 months, trying again and failing again, your channel has helped me with blocking him, deleting his number and going on with life. In another few months I will laugh about this silly situation, but during the hardest times it is insane how much we can suffer from a breakup. Thank you so so much for what you do!
Hey! I teach women in my private group to heal from heartbreak like a boss just as I did when that 19 year relationship ended last year, let me know if you're interested in details. Sending love your way!
How are you now?
I watch her videos whenever I am feeling really down! Her pep talks pick me up so much.
Your videos bring me comfort. I am going through a really hard breakup right now and I’m so happy to have found your content.
Sane
I didn't learn this stuff til I was 35. You got a head start on me, lol. It's tough but it really does help you live better going forward.
I dont know why but somehow I find it so comforting listening to you. I am currently going thru heartbreak, 3 wonderful years gone to drain, and what makes it worst, she broke up with me when I was financially broke, physically sick, and of all the dates she did it (broke up) was on my actual birthday just this October 2023. You could just imagine what I have to go thru during these times. Browsing thru youtube and I found you, and somehow it comforted me knowing that you were able to come out on the other side beautifully. I wish that for me too, I hope it will be the same for me. I dont think that there will be a time she will would want to come back, all I am focused right now is myself, reinventing and reviving my old self and hopefully, like you, I'll come out on the other side beautifully.
you’re not alone, we’re going to get trough this i promise you, my girlfriend broke up with me 8 days ago after 1 year of relationship, she left me saying that she didn’t feel the same about me but i later discovered that she was already fixated on another girl.
She really broke my heart in a million pieces cause i really gave the 100% of myself to her and i put her at the centre of my life for a whole year. That was my only mistake, giving to her the key to my happiness.
We’re going to be fine im sure of it ! its painful but you need to endure the storm before you get the rainbow. (im sorry for any grammatical mistakes but english is not my first language)
I’m coming back to this video and replying to this comment when I’ve truly moved on. Thank you so much for your videos.
🔝🔝🔝thanks for your love and support.please kindly send a message to my official telegram above🔝🔝🔝 I have a surprise for you🎁🎁
it took me 10 years to det over .. You just healed my heart in 24 minutes. Thank You.
Most of the people in your video seem much younger than i am. At 39 this rejection felt like the final judgement on my ability to find real love. I'm gonna take your advice and use this last year before I turn 40 to truly focus on me.
You aren’t alone - 28 and going through a divorce. If you need someone to talk to or vent to, I’m here for you. We are going to get through this. Happy early birthday 💕
I’m 25 and currently going through it however my grandma just found love at 74!! It’s never ever too late for love, you’ll get it again If you keep your heart open ❤
Im 33 and feels like final judgment on my ability to find real love. Just got dumped by my bf dated for 5months. About to get married but things turned left in just a matter of days and here I am don’t know where to start again.
@@mariansue709 I know when it's this fresh, other peoples words feel empty. But it does get better with time. My only regret is how much time i wasted being depressed. There were whole weeks i just turned off and shut the door to the world. Don't do that. It's going to hurt like crazy for a while, but please don't throw away your time like i did.
@@lunasmokezim1718 Thank you sis. I will do my very best to move forward. Prayers for you as well. We can do it. We can start over every time, everywhere, anywhere. 🙏🏻
I loved watching your videos. I cried and cried myself after a breakup.
I heard a girl saying I love u to him. He cheated and cheated so much.
I can move on now!!!
In tears after having a wild panic attack after a break up months ago. I have cried almost every night to sleep since. He moved on so fast and I’m so heart broken feeling so depressed. Thank you for this video. I hope I get passed this and move on from him soon. ❤️ sending love
I hope you get better 😕❤️ i’m also extremely depressed after a breakup and i just want to feel good about myself again soon
Thank you Lumma, my ex of 13.5 years left me for the grass is greener and it's been 2 months of full on hell of me being blamed for everything, of my tears being called aggressive, of my expression of pain being called harassment. I can't wait to move out and start no contact. Thank you for giving me hope for the future....you are a life saver!
How you feeling now?
@@adriannawofira I have since found out that he actually cheated on me with one guy before the breakup, then a few weeks after the breakup the other guy broke up with my ex. My ex then hooked up with another guy and got gonorrhoea.
It’s now over a month of no contact and i am do really well. i love my studio apartment and my new land lord and lady look after me really well. i got a scholarship ( my ex blamed my dedication to my studies as a reason for the breakup) and i start a new job tomorrow.
no contact is such a powerful weapon and tool. It has given me so much clarity such as showing me his level of cruelty for trying to convince me that the break up was all my fault (eg one excuse was that I didn’t share a blanket with him one night…stupid things like that) when in fact it was all him, he cheated on me, lied about everything and almost gave me an STD. No contact also gave me of clarity of seeing the red flags in the past.
No contact has also given me so much strength, I no longer take his BS or his lies, I stand up for myself for once, I now have dreams and hope for the future, and I have come to the point where there’s no way in hell I ever want to see that narcissists ex ever again.
This is literally how I am feeling...
Please wish me luck on this no contact. I want to find myself again. And you're right, he's okay not contacting me.. why should I keep contacting someone who ignores my messages or calls . But I'm ready to release.
It's so weird how every small thing can make u remember that person... That moment that time that weather that song that aroma.. Everything
Your videos helped me a lot, like really a lot. My break up was a few days ago, but after listening to you I always stopped crying and tried to do something else. I know, that there are still a lot more left from the healing process, but with your videos and with your pep talks i feel like it will be a lot easier. Thank you so much and keep up the good work, I love you Lumma❤
Hey! Let me know if you need help in this area. I teach women how to bounce back after heartbreak with confidence in a group setting. This is my expertise after bouncing back from a 19 year relationship that ended last year. Sending love your way!
@@shatiyamacon8564how?? 😢😢
I hope this video helps me. This is my 2nd breakup (both cheated on me), worst is 2nd guy did it knowing what happened to me before. He cheated and hid from me, I found out after 5 years while we were still together (I feel so dumb for not knowing). While I was forgetting about that, in a year, he did it again. It is so exhausting. Nothing feels right. Hopelessness and disgust is all I feel. Thanks for doing this.
She cheated on me one so I gave her second chance I thought it will work out but I was wrong she cheated on me second time and dump me and left me. When she have no one to turn too I was with her I sacrificed everything for her but she did me dirty. It hurts so much I got really sick and I have an exam but I couldn't concentrate on my study as it's hurt so much. I will like everyone to know that don't trust people around you they act like friend in front of you but stab your back when you're not looking. I don't think I could ever date a girl anymore they play too much for my feeling
Exactly Same happened to me, even I gave him second chance, but he cheated again... finally broke up 3 days ago, even though he hurt me so bad i still love him so much and miss him so much.... everyday is so difficult to survive 💔
❤❤❤ im so touch by your video and i was inspired by your 3 months journey of being in a heartbroken situation ... I hope 🙏🏻 i am too going to a place were youre right now after the heartbreak.... I am also in my 3 mos stage of pain,,, and i know like you its a slow process to me ... And i wish that i can myself also to a place that you have all said is right .. ❤❤❤ thank you for the inspiring and the braveheart that you share to us ❤❤❤
Hi lumma! I found your 3 months heartbreak video when i was still dating that person and i didn't watch it then but it sort of just stuck with me, and a month after i came across that video, we broke up. It's been 4 months now since that break up and your videos have been the only thing that helped me move on. I cried when u did and i would sit in a corner of my room and cry while playing your video. We met last month, after 2 months of no contact and everything and i felt nothing towards him, i felt absolutely nothing and then i came back home and replayed your videos again and i cried again but this time of happiness that that gut wrenching feeling is over, it's finally over and i have moved on. You were put on this earth to make a difference and you surely did do that!
im struggling at the moment, it’s been a week after our breakup and the way it ended was that he lost feelings for me and just didn’t feel that spark anymore, which left me completely lost and heartbroken.
it has only been a week and im still getting all this anxiety and panic, i can’t eat as much because my throat tightens with anxiety and i keep thinking “how on earth can i move on completely”. we have agreed that we’d like to meet up as friends once im completely healed because we used to be friends years before we got together. hearing that you’ve been able to have contact again without feeling anything towards him makes me hopeful because i really just want to get over him so i can move on with my life but still hang out maybe once or twice just to catch up on what we’re doing because after all that we’ll be going to college and just moving forward to the point where we won’t really think or need to hang out. after reading this i really truly hope i can move on properly and be able to see him as nothing more than a friend
@@evieshepherd_ hi girl! So for some context, my ex and i dated for 1.5 years, and he was my best friend(like actually my best friend, we would go everywhere together)since i was 14, i am about to turn 20 in 2 months now. The last time we met was the last time i spoke to him, i haven't spoken to him since then, infact he left for college yesterday which in a completely different state and i still didn't meet him nor did i text him.
The reason why i feel the context is important is because a) u have to realize (in your own time ofc) that u've dropped him off at his station and your train is moving towards the next station or the next destination, his job in your life is over, he has served his purpose. You were 'you' before him and you're going to be 'you' after him
b) rn it's very hard to not think about what he maybe doing or who he maybe talking to, or whether or not he is online, but you can't let someone else become the main character of your life and make yourself sit in the sideline and watch it
C) once you're healed not a single ounce of you would want to meet him, u won't hate him, but you won't love him either, you'll not even think of him, you'll absorb in the life around u as your reality and you'll continue living your life
@@evieshepherd_ and trust me, i feel so grateful that i get to enter my 20s with all the lessons heartbreak taught me at 19, that now it makes sense why it needed to happen at 19. I promise you in 3-4 months from now you'll barely be able to recognize yourself, so in the grand scheme of things, i feel extremely excited for you ❤
You’re beautiful Lumma, any gentleman would be so happy to have you.
I watched this many times. I am still healing, tho it's already 6 months. Thank you so much for sharing this
i honestly feel worn out from relationships now. it’s such a hard thing bc when you’re in love with somebody you literally give yourself away. a piece of yourself has died along with that relationship. it’s been 2 months and i’ve improved but the only thing weighing me down are the memories of him and the anxiety of seeing him again in a few weeks for school. i just wanna be strong and not have my heart drop.