Responding to the’advice’ of some people in regards to this video. 15/30 Responding to ‘haters’ whom commented on my video- Separating after 29 years of marriage th-cam.com/video/3cX5hdtTt28/w-d-xo.html
No two domestic problems are alike.I listen to sentiments, ideas and opinion and I always think of us as different individuals in almost all aspects.As I always tell myself, RESPECT is one of the most important ingredient in a relationship. 😊
I have been married for 39 years and wanting to leave my husband! Our marriage has gone south and has been for awhile. I just lost my brother to cancer at 63. I am grieving for him too. I have left my husband several times and always come back to him and things are fine for awhile but then it happens again but each time it gets worse for me. He uses Money against me and throws that in my face. I only work 2 days a week because in the spring i broke my wrist and have a plate and screws in it. I am a hairstylist. He was horrible during that time. and has been so aloof. we do nothing together. it is miserable.
@@beckyrokey3758 Thank you for sharing what you are going through. I’m so sorry that you are going through this hard time. Do what you need to for your mental health. Reach out for help.
@@beckyrokey3758 I’m so sorry for your loss, that would be so hard to loose your sibling at such a young age. And to have marital problems at the same time. Please take care of you.
I'll show my age here LOL but there used to be a book called Men are from Mars women are from Venus. We are definitely made differently. My 40-year-old son lives here with me and we go through times of not agreeing, but I have to remember that he doesn't have the emotions that I do that might be tied to why I am feeling a deep emotion about something that he isn't. I was married for 40 years my husband passed away almost 2 years ago. During that 40 years we separated one time. He went to live with his mom for a little while, fortunately we were able to work things out together. I think we just needed some time apart. Sometimes time alone without that other person constantly in front of you helps you think better. Praying the best for your family🙏💐
Holy moly! Took me about forever to get here! I’m here and the amount of comments and views is amazing! People must be able to resonate with what you’re sharing. Now I’ll watch and no worries about answering back. You have so many comments to keep up with❤
I am new to your channel. I am so sorry that you feel that way about church. I belong to a Baptist Church since March, 2015. I am retired 74 yr old; I have been saved since 1988🙏3 out of 4 of my children are saved. I was not raised in a Christian household. I was raised catholic, my parents never attended church and we just went on Easter, myself and my two brothers. I never take my salvation for granted I don’t know where I would be with God‘s love and grace. He’s the one that got me through my husband illness for nine years and his death coming on 10 years. I’m sorry you feel like that.❤ where I wish you nothing but the best on this new journey. But God I’ve been saved and unsaved and salvation is so much better with him in my life.
@@FaithyandOtis..Massachusetts Hi and thank you for joining me. I love God with all my heart. He’s the one that has walked beside me, carried me, held my hand through many different trials. I’m so very glad that you have a relationship with him, and that you has been your rock through the hard times. I’m sorry for the loss of your husband. ❤️ I appreciate you.
@@Kathleensplace thank you so much and with God’s help you get through it he never said we wouldn’t have trials. But the blessings we get at the end of each trial, it is well worth it. I will put you on my prayer list, my friend.
I’ve been married 31 years and it does take work. Everything you desire sounds reasonable however the other half has to be an active participant. I know you have a good head on your shoulders and will listen to your gut. I always tell the kids that (listen to your gut) You know yourself best and what you need. ❤❤ lots of love Kathleen. I’m here! Part of the community!
Hey Queen, sending you love and prayers. Thank you for sharing this lap of your journey. You are absolutely right, sometimes when things are not adding up, start subtracting and this will help you to find clarity. Keep showing up for yourself💖
Kathleen, my heart goes out to you as you’re working through your marriage struggles. You are going to be okay, no matter what happens. Listen to your own heart the most ❤
I was married for 33 years . Ive been divorced for two years . I will be 60 in December. People grow apart . People change . I stayed because of our kids . Unfortunately they got to see their parents as two ships passing in the night . We were basically roommates at best . Wives tend to stay because of money or fear their peers will judge them. What i did was push my own feelings down for many years . He let me know many times he made more money than me so basically I was beneath him. Surprise surprise I wish I would of left him 25 plus years ago . He drinks too much which was always a huge factor for me . Smoked weed which I never liked . I had almost no opinions which mattered . I will say being on my own has let ME be ME again. I am worthy and Im open to someone coming into my life but am fine on my own. Remember,you only have one life to live ...always move forward ...each time you let that person back in iour life your moving backwards because HE is what your used to ..best of luck doing YOUR LIFE YOUR WAY ❤
Thank you Rhonda, you’re right there are few reasons why we stay. I’m sorry that it didn’t go well for you. Thank you for sharing and your encouragement. I’m glad you have found yourself. All of the best wishes for you. 💕
I'm so sorry. Whatever the circumstances, that's essentially a lifetime and that's got to bring grief. One thing I learned widowed at just turned 37, women so much better than men. We tend to move on with our lives and they tend to die but of neglect. I wish you the very, very best as you enter into this new phase of your life. And, you can find God in prayer wherever you are. It doesn't have to be anywhere specific. It doesn't even have to be a specific religion. Jews, Muslims, and Christians all pray to the same God even though we fight each other like cats. Spend time with Him, just you and Him. There's religion and there's relationship and relationship time just opened up.
It's not a good idea to live with your daughter, you will put strain on their marriage. If you are leaving your husband you must stand on your own two feet. It's not your daughters problem and she shouldn't be involved or put into the middle. I hope you seek counseling. I am not trying to be rude, be careful here and consider others.
@@vintagegirl68 Thank you, I will be seeking counselling. I did tell my daughter that I’d rather live on my own with her brother (15) but her and her husband insisted and won’t let me say no. My hope is to be on my own, I don’t want to be a burden to my family or cause any conflict in her marriage. 💕
@@Kathleensplace I hope the best for you and your family. I've learned the hard way involving my children in our marriage problems It doesn't end very well. It sounds like they love you, They just may not understand that we need boundaries to protect everybody. I hope you work things out with your husband. Cheers
I just got divorced after 46 years of marriage. It's been hard living with others, in hotels, I have a German shepherd that I bring along with me, walking everyday, we are committed to this exercise. I really do pray that u and your husband will be able to communicate and keep growing in your relationship. I am a believer and so was my husband. Had trouble communicating and getting out and doing things together. Take care and God bless you.
Isn't that the truth that gen X has to figure out everything on their own. As kids had to fend for ourselves. I hope things get better for you soon.Thanks for this video.
I am so sorry that apparently your Church back in that time was toxic. We love our Church Family. All of them. We are a Praying Church and we love new people! Maybe you can find a new Church! One that supports ypu! I am so sorry you are going through this. We will celebrate ourc49thAnniversary Oct. 24th. I will be hoping and praying that ypu can work it out!
@@kibblenbits actually, I didn’t complain about any of the comments, there were others that had been through divorce and had been judged by others. I don’t mind the comments no matter how it is. If I thought comments that were against my opinions would bother me, I definitely wouldn’t have shared anything personal. Thanks for your comment.
Stand on your own two feet and get your own place. You’re a grown woman and even if your daughter insist your the mother and she will respect your decision. If you don’t work get a job
I am not sure it is wise to move out of your home if you own it and are not a renter - your husband should be the one moving out if he wants to save your marriage - he gets all the comforts of home and might just like being alone - plus it gives him more power to - abandonment could be used against you if your not legally separated. Perhaps you should get advice from a lawyer or google it. I am not trying to paint a bad picture but people don't change overnight - its a journey and one that may not go well - I wish the best and hope you get the spark back that kept your marriage united in love.
@@Kathleensplace amen and amen....hope your hub isnt in the 2 Tim 3-1-5 mode...I divorced my first one bc of that....just too nasty to stay married to, life was miserable with him. now married almost 50 happy years to a great guy!
Yes like you have no responsibility in him leaving. Women want to bash men all day everyday but very very rarely share responsibility for him leaving. For example I left my marriage physically after she left mentally and emotionally. But she’s the one that would wait till I fell asleep to go to bed to avoid sex. Three years of a dead bedroom amongst other things is why I left.
@@Kathleensplace yes it was all playing the victim and poor me and man shaming. Have you ever looked in the mirror and asked yourself “what is my role in the marriage failing” women never do they just repeatedly say he was abusive or narcissist.
People change getting married so young you change and if you don’t grow together you fizzle out .. when you get away from the wrong person god opens the door for the right person to walk in .
. I am not a rocket scientist, but things probably didn't disintegrate in the last year. I would stay in the marriage, pray to God about his will and know that an intrusion into your adult children's home will be just that. If you cannot afford to move out and get your own place, then perhaps you cannot afford to get rid of your husband. Grandstanding to get your way often leaves one in a worse place and now dragging your children into it is selfish. The whoa is me and the typecasting as a victim doesn't give you the right to be so demanding. Then, if your husband doesn't walk the line to please you, get a divorce and settle the estate for half profits and get you a place to stay on your own.
You sound pretty miserable yourself to be able to think you can say something like that to someone you don't even know. I can't even imagine the circumstances in your life that made you so bitter but I hope you can heal
@@rosegroshek1218 I am not the least bit bitter. But I live in reality. I also have no selfishness, no thoughts of life nor a marriage being made for just my own needs and I am a champion of living within means and not trauma dumping on others and especially family. There isn't one word of what I mentioned that wasn't truthful. If the truth hurts you, perhaps you are one in need of healing.
Responding to the’advice’ of some people in regards to this video.
15/30 Responding to ‘haters’ whom commented on my video- Separating after 29 years of marriage
th-cam.com/video/3cX5hdtTt28/w-d-xo.html
No two domestic problems are alike.I listen to sentiments, ideas and opinion and I always think of us as different individuals in almost all aspects.As I always tell myself, RESPECT is one of the most important ingredient in a relationship. 😊
Kathleensplace, wish you smooth sailing always,
@@Dol-pk2nn thank you
@@Dol-pk2nn your statement is so very true
Left my hubby at age 52, glad i did. I was basically the maid. Living alone is so much better for me. But it did take 5 years to adjust.
@@pamelavesey6381 I hear you. Enjoy your newly found autonomy ❤️✨🤗
@@pamelavesey6381 yes, it would definitely take time to adjust, sometimes it’s what needs to be done. I hope you are well.
@@pamelavesey6381 I’m sorry you ended up having to leave but glad that you are content with your decision.
Men need to realize they are not entitled to sacrifice the life of their wife and children for their own personal ego gain.
@@bluecube7247 so true
I have been married for 39 years and wanting to leave my husband! Our marriage has gone south and has been for awhile. I just lost my brother to cancer at 63. I am grieving for him too. I have left my husband several times and always come back to him and things are fine for awhile but then it happens again but each time it gets worse for me. He uses Money against me and throws that in my face. I only work 2 days a week because in the spring i broke my wrist and have a plate and screws in it. I am a hairstylist. He was horrible during that time. and has been so aloof. we do nothing together. it is miserable.
@@beckyrokey3758 Thank you for sharing what you are going through. I’m so sorry that you are going through this hard time. Do what you need to for your mental health. Reach out for help.
@@beckyrokey3758 I’m so sorry for your loss, that would be so hard to loose your sibling at such a young age. And to have marital problems at the same time. Please take care of you.
I'll show my age here LOL but there used to be a book called Men are from Mars women are from Venus. We are definitely made differently. My 40-year-old son lives here with me and we go through times of not agreeing, but I have to remember that he doesn't have the emotions that I do that might be tied to why I am feeling a deep emotion about something that he isn't.
I was married for 40 years my husband passed away almost 2 years ago. During that 40 years we separated one time. He went to live with his mom for a little while, fortunately we were able to work things out together. I think we just needed some time apart. Sometimes time alone without that other person constantly in front of you helps you think better. Praying the best for your family🙏💐
@@esteeb42 Thank you very much for sharing, yes I know the book. You are very correct, we are very different. 😊 I appreciate your prayers.
Holy moly! Took me about forever to get here! I’m here and the amount of comments and views is amazing! People must be able to resonate with what you’re sharing. Now I’ll watch and no worries about answering back. You have so many comments to keep up with❤
@@Lifeinthewyldewest thank you, I didn’t dream of any of my videos reaching so many people
I am new to your channel. I am so sorry that you feel that way about church. I belong to a Baptist Church since March, 2015. I am retired 74 yr old; I have been saved since 1988🙏3 out of 4 of my children are saved. I was not raised in a Christian household. I was raised catholic, my parents never attended church and we just went on Easter, myself and my two brothers. I never take my salvation for granted I don’t know where I would be with God‘s love and grace. He’s the one that got me through my husband illness for nine years and his death coming on 10 years. I’m sorry you feel like that.❤ where I wish you nothing but the best on this new journey. But God I’ve been saved and unsaved and salvation is so much better with him in my life.
@@FaithyandOtis..Massachusetts Hi and thank you for joining me.
I love God with all my heart.
He’s the one that has walked beside me, carried me, held my hand through many different trials.
I’m so very glad that you have a relationship with him, and that you has been your rock through the hard times. I’m sorry for the loss of your husband.
❤️ I appreciate you.
@@Kathleensplace thank you so much and with God’s help you get through it he never said we wouldn’t have trials. But the blessings we get at the end of each trial, it is well worth it. I will put you on my prayer list, my friend.
@FaithyandOtis..Massachusetts Thank you Faithy, it is greatly appreciated. 💝
I’ve been married 31 years and it does take work. Everything you desire sounds reasonable however the other half has to be an active participant. I know you have a good head on your shoulders and will listen to your gut. I always tell the kids that (listen to your gut) You know yourself best and what you need. ❤❤ lots of love Kathleen.
I’m here! Part of the community!
@@Lifeinthewyldewest Hi Tracie, thanks for the encouraging words. I appreciate you. I’m glad you’re apart of the community. 💕💕
Hey Queen, sending you love and prayers. Thank you for sharing this lap of your journey. You are absolutely right, sometimes when things are not adding up, start subtracting and this will help you to find clarity. Keep showing up for yourself💖
@@coachmarymah Thank you for your encouraging words, as always. 💝
Kathleen, my heart goes out to you as you’re working through your marriage struggles. You are going to be okay, no matter what happens. Listen to your own heart the most ❤
@@Dr.DorisTorres Thank you Doris for your encouraging words. 💕
I wish you all the best
@MamaBear-m9i Thank you
@@MamaBear-m9i Thank you
I was married for 33 years . Ive been divorced for two years . I will be 60 in December. People grow apart . People change . I stayed because of our kids . Unfortunately they got to see their parents as two ships passing in the night . We were basically roommates at best . Wives tend to stay because of money or fear their peers will judge them. What i did was push my own feelings down for many years . He let me know many times he made more money than me so basically I was beneath him. Surprise surprise I wish I would of left him 25 plus years ago . He drinks too much which was always a huge factor for me . Smoked weed which I never liked . I had almost no opinions which mattered . I will say being on my own has let ME be ME again. I am worthy and Im open to someone coming into my life but am fine on my own. Remember,you only have one life to live ...always move forward ...each time you let that person back in iour life your moving backwards because HE is what your used to ..best of luck doing YOUR LIFE YOUR WAY ❤
Thank you Rhonda, you’re right there are few reasons why we stay. I’m sorry that it didn’t go well for you. Thank you for sharing and your encouragement.
I’m glad you have found yourself. All of the best wishes for you. 💕
💋
I lost my teeth and health due to an abusive marriage. I've been trying to heal my adrenals, kidneys and liver for 16 years
@@simplyblessed7036 thank you for sharing, I’m sorry for all that you have been through.
First time here. Prayers for you dear and hope you and your husband resolve your issues.
@@Sherry-v2w Thank you Sherry
You don't have to go to church... you can still have a relationship with God.
@@Shar-m30 Amen!
I'm so sorry. Whatever the circumstances, that's essentially a lifetime and that's got to bring grief. One thing I learned widowed at just turned 37, women so much better than men. We tend to move on with our lives and they tend to die but of neglect. I wish you the very, very best as you enter into this new phase of your life. And, you can find God in prayer wherever you are. It doesn't have to be anywhere specific. It doesn't even have to be a specific religion. Jews, Muslims, and Christians all pray to the same God even though we fight each other like cats. Spend time with Him, just you and Him. There's religion and there's relationship and relationship time just opened up.
@@franny5295 thank you so much, I appreciate your kind words. I am definitely spending time with God and asking for guidance.
It's not a good idea to live with your daughter, you will put strain on their marriage. If you are leaving your husband you must stand on your own two feet. It's not your daughters problem and she shouldn't be involved or put into the middle. I hope you seek counseling. I am not trying to be rude, be careful here and consider others.
@@vintagegirl68 Thank you, I will be seeking counselling.
I did tell my daughter that I’d rather live on my own with her brother (15) but her and her husband insisted and won’t let me say no.
My hope is to be on my own, I don’t want to be a burden to my family or cause any conflict in her marriage. 💕
@@Kathleensplace I hope the best for you and your family. I've learned the hard way involving my children in our marriage problems It doesn't end very well. It sounds like they love you, They just may not understand that we need boundaries to protect everybody. I hope you work things out with your husband. Cheers
@vintagegirl68 thank you for your kind words 💕
Wishing you health and happiness no matter if that is with your husband or alone.
thank you Iz 🤗 much love
I just got divorced after 46 years of marriage. It's been hard living with others, in hotels, I have a German shepherd that I bring along with me, walking everyday, we are committed to this exercise. I really do pray that u and your husband will be able to communicate and keep growing in your relationship. I am a believer and so was my husband. Had trouble communicating and getting out and doing things together. Take care and God bless you.
@@GARNETROCKS I’m sorry to hear about your divorce. I appreciate you sharing. God bless and I pray things improve for you.
My heart and prayers go out to all of you. I’m so sorry for your pain.
Thank you Deborah 💕
Isn't that the truth that gen X has to figure out everything on their own. As kids had to fend for ourselves. I hope things get better for you soon.Thanks for this video.
@@lisastevens105 thanks for joining me, 💕
Prayers for you and your husband and your family.🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
@@PattyB.Gardening Thanks Patty, greatly appreciated 💕
I have been married 53 years! I wish the best for you. God Bless.
@@pamelagay3303 Thank you Pamela 💕
@@pamelagay3303 thank you Pamela
You are so brave,It sounds like you have a good plan. Much love .
Thank you
I'm sry your going through this. I hope he will hear your words and give his all. Hugs
@@sandiemom8888 Thank you 🫶
Praying you can find fellowship with strong believers that will help you on this journey
@@PinkandPossible Thank you Pink
@@KathleensplaceSorry to be "correcting" u but i think she's just pink and not pinka.
@@maryanne7161 you’re right, and I don’t mind you correcting me, I appreciate it
I am so sorry that apparently your Church back in that time was toxic. We love our Church Family. All of them. We are a Praying Church and we love new people! Maybe you can find a new Church! One that supports ypu! I am so sorry you are going through this. We will celebrate ourc49thAnniversary Oct. 24th. I will be hoping and praying that ypu can work it out!
Thank you very much ☺️
It's beyond sad when people post personal information online to perfect strangers, then complain about the feedback they opened themselves up to. smh
@@kibblenbits actually, I didn’t complain about any of the comments, there were others that had been through divorce and had been judged by others. I don’t mind the comments no matter how it is. If I thought comments that were against my opinions would bother me, I definitely wouldn’t have shared anything personal.
Thanks for your comment.
Unless your husband has cheated, you shouldn’t divorce. You can separate if he is abusive. That’s my understanding of the Bible.
Stand on your own two feet and get your own place. You’re a grown woman and even if your daughter insist your the mother and she will respect your decision. If you don’t work get a job
@@CC-cn3cz if you watch Haters Gonna Hate, it’ll explain everything about this. Thanks for your comment.
I am not sure it is wise to move out of your home if you own it and are not a renter - your husband should be the one moving out if he wants to save your marriage - he gets all the comforts of home and might just like being alone - plus it gives him more power to - abandonment could be used against you if your not legally separated. Perhaps you should get advice from a lawyer or google it. I am not trying to paint a bad picture but people don't change overnight - its a journey and one that may not go well - I wish the best and hope you get the spark back that kept your marriage united in love.
@@cosmiccountrygirl179 thanks for your kind thoughts
Praying for you, 🤗💕
@@lynnesroufe8068 thank you 💕
I will pray for you and your family
Thank you for your prayers and support 💕
Please don’t be a part in straining your daughter’s marriage while trying to fix your own. It happens….
@@patriciabarnhart1886 I totally understand, if you watch the video Haters Gonna Hate, I explain things in there. 💕💝
Pray to God for help
That I do, thank you 🙏
I got divorced after 27 years and ten months of marriage last year.
Raise your phone/ camera so we are not looking up at you.
Will do, thank you for the tip. 😊
I would not recommend moving out of your house
@@annberlin5811 thank you for your tips, we are moving in three days.
Whos Gord? its in your description....
@@Lauren-vd4qe lol God, thanks for being my spell checker, autocorrect isn’t the best
@@Kathleensplace 😂😂 for a minute there i thought there was another dude in the picture, yikes.
@@Lauren-vd4qe 😂😂oh no, just the big guy above 👆
@@Kathleensplace amen and amen....hope your hub isnt in the 2 Tim 3-1-5 mode...I divorced my first one bc of that....just too nasty to stay married to, life was miserable with him. now married almost 50 happy years to a great guy!
It’s a huge, difficult step but I commend you for taking control of your life.
What is not said stsnds out but i realize 9:01 that this is a process.....
@@user-st6nt4ou6f yes it is a process
@@user-st6nt4ou6f what do you mean what is not said stands out?
Good morning.
@@michaelsadventures4261 Good morning
Exactly men are selfish, not all men. After 25 years married my husband abandoned son and me.
@@sandiemom8888 I’m sorry to hear that, hugs to you. How are you doing
Yes like you have no responsibility in him leaving. Women want to bash men all day everyday but very very rarely share responsibility for him leaving. For example I left my marriage physically after she left mentally and emotionally. But she’s the one that would wait till I fell asleep to go to bed to avoid sex. Three years of a dead bedroom amongst other things is why I left.
@BrianWaller-qe7gr did you listen to the video?
@@Kathleensplace yes it was all playing the victim and poor me and man shaming. Have you ever looked in the mirror and asked yourself “what is my role in the marriage failing” women never do they just repeatedly say he was abusive or narcissist.
@BrianWaller-qe7gr thank you for your comment.
Is divorce an option?
@@sweetbeep It is but it’s not my hope
@@Kathleensplace what about your Christian marriage vows? Your promise to God means nothing?
I will talk about this in another video, it’s a lot to cover in a message. Great question though. 💕
@@sweetbeep Hi sweetbeep, that’s a great question, I’ll talk about this in a video as it’s too much to discuss on here.
People change getting married so young you change and if you don’t grow together you fizzle out .. when you get away from the wrong person god opens the door for the right person to walk in .
🌹🙏🇺🇲
Thank you
. I am not a rocket scientist, but things probably didn't disintegrate in the last year. I would stay in the marriage, pray to God about his will and know that an intrusion into your adult children's home will be just that. If you cannot afford to move out and get your own place, then perhaps you cannot afford to get rid of your husband. Grandstanding to get your way often leaves one in a worse place and now dragging your children into it is selfish. The whoa is me and the typecasting as a victim doesn't give you the right to be so demanding. Then, if your husband doesn't walk the line to please you, get a divorce and settle the estate for half profits and get you a place to stay on your own.
Thanks for the advice 💕
You sound pretty miserable yourself to be able to think you can say something like that to someone you don't even know. I can't even imagine the circumstances in your life that made you so bitter but I hope you can heal
@@rosegroshek1218 I am not the least bit bitter. But I live in reality. I also have no selfishness, no thoughts of life nor a marriage being made for just my own needs and I am a champion of living within means and not trauma dumping on others and especially family. There isn't one word of what I mentioned that wasn't truthful. If the truth hurts you, perhaps you are one in need of healing.
@@rosegroshek1218 I agree. Making judgments on others is so harsh. Especially when you haven't walked in their shoes.
You know who it is. Don't act stupid.
@@patriciaceja6112 who are you talking to? I only appreciate positive comments here even if it’s in my defence. I appreciate you 💕
Blah blah blah
lol