@@theantibot❤Jesus power ❤ All black and white sheep will receive ( level 1) portion of youth longevity digestion an self beauty Jesus energy wash tonight at( ( 11 07 ) eastren. Negative energy will creep out yr feet tell it's time. Starting now
Saying that your wife is your "greatest challenge" and then having the nerve to say that single women will be the unhappy ones is a truely insane level of denial.
@@TheFirefishe well, even less misogynistic people than him can make their partner miserable. But yes, the socialization of men who expect their partners to do everything while they do nothing is also a part of misogyny, writ large.
71 years old, single and lived on my own for the vast majority of my adult life. Very happy camper here. Would hate to have to live with another person. I get to do things my way and never have to compromise or ask for permission for anything. Wouldn't change a thing.
Exactly that’s because people like mark teach and preach to people that in order to be happy and fulfilled and be in align with God you need to be married.if that’s the only reason why you are married then deep down you are going to be miserable.Even though people like him preach that marriage is the best thing that you should do.
Good luck when your knees go out, when you can’t get out of bed, when you can’t afford meds, when you have no one to help you. Good luck being elderly and alone. You’ll change your tune.
My grandma lost her husband when she was in her 40s. She was a very Christian woman, but decided she was happier not marrying again, living alone, travelling the world, and enjoying her independence. She was quite conservative, went to church, knitted for charity, etc. However she told me that she saw no benefit to getting married again and having a man make her do everything for him, when she can just live her own life. She saw that marriage wasn't equal for her, so she opted out. I respected that.
Some studies, perhaps like the one the pastor was referencing would have ignored your grandmother and would only have taken people who are still currently married into consideration along with people who had never married. In other words these studies sometimes ignore anyone who has been marrying previously and either lost their partner or decided to get divorced. That’s a large percentage of people to ignore in your study. If you look you’ll find studies that contradict the results he quotes and even studies that aren’t so clear cut like ones that say children do bring great joy but also great stress and sadness so working out if having children results in a net positive or negative when it comes to overall happiness is very difficult. This means people may report either way depending how they feel when they are asked.
I find it so interesting that Christianity shows this perspective of the woman of service to the man. It's bonkers to me that any modern man would allow this. As a man, I don't want my wife to ever walk away from me and have a negative view of marriage. I also don't want a woman to serve me but I do want reciprocation. What I do for her she does for me. But in this dating world today that's even hard to find as well. A lot of trust issues out here which is fair but it is what it is. I just hate the negative view of marriage.
"I wouldn't wanna live with someone who can dominate me. I'd be scared" "Women are only happy if they live with someone who can dominate them" 😂 I cannot deal with this dude
That part really jumped out at me! He just spent a while describing how women are "weaker vessels" and all that, then just flat admits that he'd be terrified of a marriage where those roles were reversed. Well, what if women would also be afraid to be in a relationship with someone they were aware could beat them up? Somehow, though, he doesn't seem to think women should be sleeping with protective gear on. Truly a mystery! /s
Interesting how he speaks to his children about marriage... for the boys: marry the one you can't live without. For the girls: marry the one who can't live without you. It's a subtle distinction, but he's made it passive for the girls. Marriage is something boys choose, but for girls it's just something that happens to you. It's not about what she wants, it's about what some dude wants from her.
Or he meant to marry someone who loves them more than they do so they wouldnt be stuck with bad boys who use them for their body and then leave. But its also dangerous cause once his daughters are done and want to seperate these dudes can turn abusive real quick.
I don't think that's quite it, I don't see one of those as passive and one as active, you can take just as much of an active role in finding someone who can't live without you as you can in finding someone you can't live without. I think the difference is that he takes it for granted that a woman can't live without a man, so that's true either way.
60 plus year old female, here. never married and never wanted to be married. Never had an STD, never had an abortion because I know how birth control works, Not a virgin and don't have a cat. No debts, no bills I didn't create, car is paid for, and I do my own laundry. Why should I be unhappy again?
@z0rrofan9 I hope to be like you as I get older. Currently 38, unmarried, childfree, never been pregnant because my longterm FWB is vasectomized. Like you, I've never had an STD, have no cats but do have 3 snakes, have been debt free since age 34, own my car, have a business degree, and been gainfully self-employed for the last 2 years. I'm an atheist and help out at my local community food pantry and SPCA. All this despite growing up as a Jehovah Witness, dealing with that religious abuse for years, and leaving my parents home alone in 11th grade. Supposedly I should be utterly miserable, have baby rabies, and be yearning for marriage. Obviously that's the opposite case 😂
Speaking as a man who's been married longer than Mark Driscoll; I could NEVER have married a woman who was capable of being easily dominated. My wife is the strongest woman I know. She's been told by MANY men that they could never "deal" with her if she was their wife. She's always said that wasn't a problem because that never would have happened. I'm not dominated by her either. We're both people with strong opinions and wills. We get each other.
Smart man. My sons are married. I am not against it. Tried it, didn't work. Not looking for men who need mother figures.😁 Not even looking. I have better things to do.😁
Heh. We're hitting 22 years married in a week. My wife and I are, for sure, equals. Oh. And as for the contract (marriage), we only bothered to get married because it has significant tax advantage and it makes everything in life bureaucratically easier.
We got married because of the parents. A wallflower woman would have had me bored in a week. If a woman actually said to me "I will defer to you because your the man" I likely would say "what the F*&^% is wrong with you, are you CRAZY??" Likewise I've seen marriages where the woman was the OPPOSITE of a wallflower and that wouldn't wash either. Seems to work for them and their fellas, more power to them.
Alone and with seven cats!? Don’t threaten me with a good time, Markie. I grew up in a fundie family: My “perfect” older sister is married with three kids and they will never be able to own their own home because she is married to a man-child who wants more kids than they have the bandwidth or money for. She is always tired and stressed; the “traditional Christian life” is going great for her /s. My golden child little brother isn’t quite the golden child anymore because my parents finally realized they did a crummy job preparing him for the world and he’s still living at home with mummy and daddy at close to 30 years old and has no plans for moving out anytime soon. And I am the black-sheep “failure” of an atheist who is the only one among all my siblings to own my own home, have a stable job, have pets (yes, cats), and be actually happy with my current lot in life. Childfree single living is the best life I could ever have chosen, and I’m happier than I ever was living under a Christian roof. Edit:a typo
Good for you, that you managed to have a stable life and that you are happy, childhood must have been hard. I hope that you don't judge Jesus according to your family, He is the One giving and loving freedom.
Lol they tend to loose their damn minds when women say 'dont threaten me with a good time' Which is why I say it as often as I can the moment I detect them parroting the sorta bs that Driscoll puts out.
"and has no plans for moving out anytime soon." And it's important in your culture for him to move out? Shouldn't one of the children stay at home and take care for parents and grandparents if there's enough space in the flat?
"Those sad old nagging wives, amirite, folks?" "Yes, this is why I'm happy to be childfree and single" "NO! YOU LIE! You can only be happy as a wife! 😡"
"Marriage is the best thing that ever happened to me! The fact I am constantly posting old jokes about being chained to my wife and how I'm punished by her for not following her whims while commenting 'SO TRUE' is completely beside the point." "Dude you are literally blinking SOS while you're drinking at your one boy's night out each month!" "NAH, you don't understand my single friend, trust me. A wife is all you need, and your weird for not getting married yet" To myself, "Its cause I don't want to be *you or twice divorced Dave* when I'm 40. Let me figure out how best to manage my own ship first as a part of that first.
It's cus they want to have their cake and eat it too. They want to be waited on, but they want the labor to be undervalued so they can get it for cheaper. It's the big unspoken scheme of patriarchy. And it maps pretty well onto an economic comparison you might recognize. If men can form a monopoly and become the only real game in town, they can reduce wages further and further and make people work longer and longer and keep greater profits for themselves. Simply because there are no alternatives to compete with them. But now more and more women have unionized and been negotiating for better treatment. So of course men are disingenuously responding that "but if we increace wages and benefits, the whole company will go out of buisness!!" When no. It literally just means a few million less dollars in ceo pockets while literally everything else improves. Same as it was when businesses said ending child labor would cause the fall of civilization. When instead it both increased standards of living and helped drive some of the biggest economic booms in world history. Men only see the short term of it being cheaper to abuse and manipulate women into doing his bidding for very little reward. But by doing this he sacrifices long term stability because his greed is preventing him from investing in the relationship. And out of even greater greed, they'll complain that their short term strategies aren't giving them long term investment rewards. Even though when actually quizzed, they're fully aware they would neither accept such treatment themselves, nor expect the strategies to work in other similar contexts. So really at this point they just don't want to admit defeat and are trying to punish the victors by being a bunch of sore losers on the way out.
@@nomobobby all my alimony & $4K/month child support-paying friends think I'm a weirdo for not getting married nor having kids, that are spoiled brats or not. Yeah. I'm wrong. L ALSO, just get a secret vasectomy, never-the-less women you slept with will come after you for paternity. DNA testing the child should be routine, it isn't like it is painful, except to the government trying to pin all this on non-biological 'fathers' who were duped. Estimates range up to 30% false paternity in certain regions.
One of the motivators for their disgust is likely jealousy. That they grew up in a world that convinced them it was the only way to be happy, and then the new way of life comes and demonstrates other ways, and they hate to see it. Like the meme of the grouchy woman with a bunch of screaming toddlers seething about those "pretty single girls".
It always fascinates me that the men who will insist they have the best advice about marriage also seem to greatly dislike their wives, and women in general.
@@valerietaylor9615 because then they couldn't claim the martyrdom of marriage. This pastor speaks about his wife as if she's a never ending Sicyphian trial that he must push uphill, instead of a partner helping him push. That's not someone who loves his spouse, that's someone who glories in being seen as a martyr laid across the altar of marriage.
@@valerietaylor9615 You can hate women but still like the benefits of having a traditional housewife. That’s the reason why so many of them get married. They want to have children but they don’t want to be the one raising them. They want to have a house but they don’t want to actually cook and clean to have a good domestic life. They want to sleep with women but they don’t actually want to find them.
I think it’s very important to ask the unmarried, childless people WHY they’re less happy, because why is the assumption that getting married and having kids would fix whatever is wrong with their life? As someone who is unmarried, childless, and unhappy, I can tell you that getting married would only make my life worse. I need a therapist, not a goddamn kid to take care of when I can barely take care of myself.
Exactly, these conservatives love to point out that women without children are more likely to be mentally ill, but they never stop to consider that maybe mentally ill women are just more likely to choose not to have kids, and for damn good reason.
Yeah, like maybe people who are happy and outgoing are more likely to be in relationships and get married, leading to them being more likely to have kids....and maybe depressed people are more likely to stay home alone, leading down a rabbithole of more depression and loneliness. Maybe those happy fathers were also more happy before they were father's?
@@marlenaneedham3818it could also be contributed to by financial capabilities as well as most people tend to wait until after they are more financially secure to marry and have kids. Also being able to afford to treat mental health issues like depression and anxiety tend to help you in getting into a position to even get a long term partner
Yeah, someone I know mocked people that got a cat instead of a child to "baby" and I said: Would you rather have them birth a baby to "ruin"? Babying a cat is one thing, you can vent your motherimpulses on it and that is very wise in comparison to having babies. Cats don't mind being babied, but babies need a whole lot of care and you will ruin a life if you do it wrong. Let those cat/dog/pet-lovers be responsible.
Anybody else just kind of annoyed by Mark Driscoll describing his (hypothetical) daughter lashing out after being trapped in a (hypothetical) abusive marriage as "Her trying to dominate [her husband] and becoming manipulative", thus being responsible for escalating her own abuse? Gotta love that victim-blaming! 🙄🙄
As a 31yo woman who's never been married or in relationships I feel a liitle joy every time my existence upset garbage people. I see that as an absolute win.
You: does absolutely nothing Them: why dont you get married? You must be so sad rn! I mean, living with my wife is basically hell for me and I don't treat her that well but why dont you want this too???
Agreed they hate it. Their pride and ego even shows in church I don't know why misogynists try to associate themselves with God but misogyny and bigotry is a form of hatred it's damned because it's hatred it's something the devil puts in their heads by making them think it's God talking to them. It's not something God wants for women it's something men want for women. God may have commanded women to submit to her husband but he did not command her to submit to an abuser. It says submit to the one you love if you can't find love then don't get married. Just be loyal to God. You can still get in there if your single his son was single too, especially if you had impairments he doesn't damn women for things that are out of there control I'm sure even he knows that a lot of men are messed up in the head and no longer capable of loving women that way anyways so it wouldn't make sense to get married at a time like this when men just want to use and discard women.
The truth is, that folks are waiting longer before entering into that contract. I'm unsure why evangelicals are freaking out that people are taking a more prudent approach to marriage and avoiding it until they are truly adults.
@t0dd000 how dare you claim that the way *they* did things might not be the one and only way to do the thing, thereby insinuating that they would have had a choice!! /s 😅
Why shouldn’t they? There is a huge risk for men because woman will destroy a man and take everything they ever worked for because they’re mad. If I were a man, I’d never marry either. As long as woman are getting paid to be awful, cheat, and abuse the system with divorce, men should not get married
@@t0dd000 The single greatest predictor of divorce is the age at which people get married. Waiting until you’re older to marry dramatically decreases the likelihood of divorcing
😢😢😢 Single Women are so lonely without a family during Christmas. What? No There’s no such thing as parents, grandparents, cousins, siblings or nephews to visit during Christmas for dinner. No no no, the only thing that exist is a husband and children. Friends!? What is that? Some woke bullshit? There’s no such thing as “friends”
When I was living with my ex, we hosted 8 for Christmas dinner. Non of us lived close to family so we got together, ate food, drank and played board games all day. Christmas isn't just for kids and families 💚
He's just making up his own narrative clearly lol or that may be how it goes for HIM if he's single, and he's projecting. Just saying, guys don't usually organize holidays well, so he would probably be alone or waiting for an invite to someone else's celebration. But that's on him, lol
As a 38 single childless woman I wish that were true. I hate Christmas. But my family...and my friends...with their family...want me around. They cannot fathom someone Not liking christmas and prefering beeing alone
I'd love to be in a happy marriage. Too bad when I was a devout Christian my husband tried to strangle me so I left. 🙄 Far happier now than I ever was in my "godly marriage."
This may be nit-picking, but for a fella who claims to preach traditional old school masculinity, he is wearing a ballcap indoors... in a church no less. Smh
I’m bald and I wear hats indoors. Head gets cold. People with hair have complained to me about wearing a hat indoors. Fuck them. Shave your head and then yell at me
As a feminist, I just want people to do what brings them joy, whether they want to get married and have 8 kids, be single forever, or whatever works for them. Marriage was super hard with my first husband because it was not a healthy relationship. Marriage isn’t hard in a healthy relationship, it rules to live with my best friend. He’s my favorite. I wanted kids. I have kids. I would die for my kids. I don’t enjoy parenting. I struggle with it a lot. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Nobody should do it unless they really really want to. Also, adding kids to a relationship where the parents aren’t equal partners would be hell.
I’ve gone back and forth a lot on whether I want kids. I’ve landed pretty firmly into the childfree camp, and reframing it to whether I want to be a parent was a huge step in that. Thank you for sharing 🩵
And I would add that children should be included as a partner in the parenting of them to a degree from my own experience with my mother and her authoritative parenting style she had focused on giving me the skills and tools I needed to be able to understand and articulate my feelings and emotions and even though she didn’t always agree with my point of view and she had the final say she would make it her life mission to make sure I understood why I was being punished or her thought process to be honest I think she focused more on that and it really upset her to see me cry because of what she did, or anyone in the family did
I agree entirely with everting you said! I’m also happy that you have a great relationship with your husband and your honestly about being a parent. I’m a single 26 year old who lives at home child free. I appreciate that you shared your experience
I think the tough stuff of parenting should be allowed to be stated. Finding it tough gets used to imply not loving children. But reality is that love and challenge can go together. If people had more freedom to be honest then those new to parenting and finding it is not some magical wonder, would not feel alone or a failure
I’m a 49 year old single, childless, pet less woman, I just got my scuba license, I have flight benefits to fly around the world to dive and vacation. I just ran a 10k and I’m training for a 1/2 marathon. Ohhh but I feel I’m going to miserable really soon! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
oh, you will be when you realize how much you've missed by not cleaning up behind a man, taking care of kids who are vomiting all night, and getting mansplained about everything you do. YOU'LL SEE. . .
"Married females are still living the longest with a gap to singles of 3.5-5.5 years." from The effect of marital status on life expectancy: Is cohabitation as protective as marriage?
@@kayanneyoung9788 you make an excellent point. I think they are still capable but it’s buried. In Buddhism there’s this idea that instead of us being born in original sin we are innately noble, but through life the mud of circumstances, programming, etc covers things up. That we have to return back to our innate goodness. Maybe he’s got a lot of mud covering up that compassion? I wish you well friend
@Stillness-Now you're based! Love the Buddhist framing of our natural state, because it (mostly) actually reflects truth instead of dogma. It also just brings so much more positivity into the world instead of the depressing idea of original sin and humans being chronically unworthy.
It annoys me to no end, when women are always described as "someone's". NO! She is someone! Always describing women (and children) in relation to others, rather than as their own person shows, that these people see women as less than human. And insisting on calling grown women "girls" is just disgusting.
I recently watched a video in which a man said that a woman belongs first to God, then her husband. This is the attitude. They don't want women to have any agency at all.
I have many Indian friends, and they refer to all unmarried adults as “boys” and “girls”. And even in the U.S., young unmarried men were often referred to as “boys” in the 1920s and 30s. Young white men, not just blacks. And there is a Gershwin song “Boy Wanted”, from the musical “Primrose”, in which the heroine describes her ideal man, or boy. And the characters were young adults in their twenties, not teenagers. “Primrose” had its premiere in 1924, in case anyone is wondering.
What gets me is the part where he says he dosent want a woman that can take him. He described a scenario where he was afraid to go to sleep. Which is the actual reality for many victims of domestic violence. They trivialize such horrible things to make their point.
Being a single mom is really difficult. You know what's even more difficult? Being a parent in a toxic marriage. We all have to make choices, everyone has their own unique situation. Knowing if someone has kids or is married is not enough information to know why they are happy or unhappy.
Being a single mother is not at all inherently difficult. Being a parent in any scenario may be difficult, but it is just silly to claim that being unpartnered automatically makes being a parent difficult.
@@bevwinn1369statically financially and how soceity treats unpartner parents and married parents is different I'm not sure what you thought you were defending but your comment at worst is objectively wrong at minimum selfishly offensive
@@Saint_Medusa nope. It is not objectively wrong to say being a single parent is not INHERENTLY difficult. Statistics do not show that being unpartnered AUTOMATICALLY makes being a parent difficult. How you can find that offensive, much less selfish, is puzzling.
I hate how when he talks about a women fighting back against a controlling husband he jumps straight to saying "Shes trying have dominion over him" and not her just trying to be treated like a human. Idk, really weird
As the spouse of a minister, I can tell you from experience, it’s never pleasant having your name invoked during a sermon. I can easily imagine what his wife is going through knowing that she will be the butt of numerous jokes as well as the subject of public examination with no forum in which to respond. If this man respected his wife, he wouldn’t bring her up like this during his sermon.
@@mlthornton1 it might surprise you to learn there have been affirming denominations that recognize the solemnity of gay marriage since the 1980’s. I get the idea you assumed my spouse to be a woman. It’s all men at my house. If by “man of the house”, you mean one person who’s word is the law… No such person exists in my house. In 30 years, there has never been a disagreement that could not be resolved through reasonable discussion. There has never been the need for one singular power holder.
This guy is making people run from your religion .the best thing covid did was show millions that going to church is pointless. You should look at the studies it is wonderful Christianity is dying
If I met a person who said they can't live without me, I would run before I ended up in the back of a trunk or the bottom of a freezer. That is so freaking enmeshed and toxic.
This is wild lol. I got married and was a loving, supportive wife. I was abused, treated like garbage, then drug through the mud when I couldn't take it anymore. I am now divorced, my ex is on Megans law and has multiple felonies and misdemeanors. I'm much happier divorced. Misogony is toxic.
I finally left my dysfunctional abusive "traditional" marriage after 20 years, taking nothing but a suitcase. That was 6 years ago. I am alone by choice and I have never been happier and more at peace in my life. ❤
@@mlthornton1If you hadn't noticed, the conservatives have been making a bid deal about needing to go back to traditional marriage, and women need to be "tradwives". They also want to be rid of no fault divorce and contraception.
Mark “joking” that if he married a tough woman who could take him in a fight, he would sleep in a cup and helmet is so telling. He sees physical equality as a threat to *his* safety rather than being able to have the same trust he expects of his wife that he isn’t gonna hurt her while she’s sleeping. Quite the double standard there Marky Mark.
Yeah, I think he’s revealing that he knows how men use their physical strength against women and he assumes that physically strong women do the same thing to men. I think he really embodies that saying “men are afraid women will treat them the way they treat women.”
Someone should tell Mark about all the mysterious arsenic poisonings that used to befall married men before divorce was common... Doesn't take much upper body strength to lift a vial, and you've got plenty of opportunities when you're barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen all day. So how safe is he really sleeping?
"all alone, with their cats." As an introvert who is married... My ideal night is literally being by myself, beneath a warm blanket. My two shadows (cats) sleeping in my lap. Losing track of time as I push through a good book. How shallow that man's life must be to project onto single women that they are so sad and lonely. It is almost as if HE is lonely and sad if he doesn't have a woman telling him how great and wonderful he is.
@@lorrainesmith.4995 Paul was really more like "Everybody should be celibate because that's just better, but if you can't control your carnal urges, at least get married so you can have sex in the most marginally acceptable way", or that's at least how I read that section. I'm pretty sure dude was ace.
Agree!! Fortunately my husband and I are both introverted cat ppl, so we not infrequently sit under a blanket with our cat sitting on us being alone together. It’s great.
I quickly figured out the fear and demonization of single women or women who don't mind being single comes from deeply rooted in men (esp. narcissistic men) fear of rejection. Rejection ruins the grandiose sense of self and reminds how out of control they really are.
Yep. Why don’t they attack men who choose to be single? Why don’t they attack incels like this? It’s so obviously laser targeted at white, European decendant women.
As a married mother of two in my 40s, this is the unhappiest I've ever been. And my husband doesn't suck and is a great father... but if we are only speaking of happiness, this isn't it.
I hate that you feel this way and I'm very sorry ☹️ take care of yourself ❤️ you matter and you can find happiness even if you don't have it right now!
Just got out of a long term relationship. He wanted to marry me, had said that for over a year. I told him I wanted to wait until I was 25 at least. And the more time went on the more verbally abusive and hurtful he became. Now, I'm single, living with a roommate who is kind to me and who I get along with excellently. This is the best relationship I've ever had. Romance is not the only thing that matters.
And, if he is also twenty-something, you two are baby adults. This is not true for everyone, of course, but I recommend everyone waiting until they are at least in their late twenties and have dated for at least 3 to 5 years before signing that contract. In the end, it is indeed a contract and the older and more stabilized (financially and career) you are in life before you sign it, the better.
“marriage isn’t hard, it’s impossible!” makes me roll my eyes so hard. i married my best friend and it’s been fairly easy. yes there are fights, there are hard days, but we just COMMUNICATE! we don’t have kids (just a cat, she is our baby!) so we travel, we love spontaneity, and do what we want childfree. why do conservatives marry people they hate?! 😭
They don't view women as people. That's literally it. Their religion views women as inferior beings so that's not really surprising. What's surprising is how many women follow religions that outright hate them. I will never understand how women can defend christianity, judaism and islam. If there was a religion that discrimated against men the way the abrahamitic religions discriminate against women, that religion would be declared illegal within days.
I suspect that many conservatives marry people they hate because they rush the marriage with the first person they're attracted to, because that's what's expected in deeply religious groups (who see non-married lust as evil). And so, they don't spend time trying to find someone they're compatible with.
Exactly. My husband and I would never call our marriage hard. We are each other's best friends and marriage is incredibly easy. If your marriage is hard you are doing something wrong. We have never ever thought of marriage as being difficult or a challenge. We would never call marriage work.
46:25 he is actively teaching his daughters that true love is the guy that says "i can't live without you". The thing that every abusive partner says to their victim. He's setting them up for it
With so much hatred and contempt for women, he is obviously an abuser himself - emotionally and spiritually if not more. Reminds me of Stephen Crowder's abusive tirade against his heavily pregnant wife.
@mdlmomma9167 well, the downfall of Mars Hill Church was because Mark Driscoll is an outright bully and abuser. He is truly christlike in his character which is evident in this sermon...ie he constantly dog whistles, demeans an6s strawmans those who don't agree with him and despises women. He wants to dehumanise women by demanding they submit and obey irrational men like him who are controlled by their emotions and hormones and constantly undermining women's credibility when it comes to our own view of our own happiness and life. He is a liar who projects his dishonesty onto women to justify his dehumanisation and disrespect of women.
Men have always set their daughters up for failure. The society ensures it is a totally one sided energy exchange where women give all their labour, happiness, time and energy for men and their happiness, not just her family but the males in society generally. Notice how parents encourage their sons for all good things and encourage girls to do all bad things, for eg, a boy will be taught to fight, be brave, face difficulties and a girl will be taught exactly the opposite, never fight, always be polite, don’t be aggressive and always look nice. See how all these things never benefit the individual girl herself but everyone else around her and society will always have men around her all the time because that’s what this whole civilisation is made up of.
2 of my daughters are almost 40 and single. They live extremely rich lives and are very happy. I'm happy for them. People who say they are defective are sick.
I remember this one republican guy saying, that it took him about 30 years to realize, that his wife has a personality. These men just have problems accepting, that women are also humans...
This reminds me of my MIL. I asked my husband what hobbies she had when we first started to date (trying to get a feel for future presents and stuff) and he could not answer it. I asked his dad (FIL) and he could really only say stuff that they did together that HE liked doing (hiking, going to the movie, etc). I looked at the both of them and actually started to cry because of the realization that this poor woman is completely unknown in her own home. 2 men that should have pretty much known everything about her (her husband and her son) couldn't even come up with ONE hobby that she likes that didn't involve any of them. My husband a few weeks later started to go to therapy afterwards since he felt so guilty by that fact and wanted to do better.
@@carolbaker2773 I wonder, did she even have hobbies and such or was she so locked in, that the concept was foreign to her? It is like an old board game commercial saying: Fun for the whole family did the commercial promote. The picture showed husband and son playing the game and wife and daughter washing dishes. (it was a 2 player game after all) The marriages of my mother were/are not that different and I sometimes have the feeling, with her Ex- and her new husband.
I suspect these men can only imagine themselves being miserable without acquiring a wife to be their cook, cleaner, brood mare, nurse, sex partner, seamstress, personal assistant, home decorator and travel agent as WELL as someone to split bills with, and just cannot IMAGINE a woman not looking at a man thinking 'oh boy i cant wait to enter servitude to a dude'. Which is really damn weird considering how often they slag off those same wives, then loose their damn minds when she goes 'urg, fine, have it your way' and files for divorce. This is all ultimately about control, and a woman who has her own money, no kids, and no man and no faith is almost completely out of their direct control.
You've just summed up every relationship I've ever been in quite nicely. Do all the traditional woman's work, and also pay the bills. (They don't want to split bills either, I'm supposed to take care of everything.)
@@bonafidehomicide5742 You’re saying that every romantic relationship you’ve had with a woman, you’ve shared a home with her and you performed all the housework, cooking, and home decorating in addition to paying all of the bills. Is that what you’re saying?
@@alexwyatt2911 I'm the woman. And yes. I'm the breadwinner, and also expected to be the subservient homemaker as well. Constantly. It seems like I just get completely screwed over when it comes to equal partnership. I hate my life.
Exactly. I don’t recall Jesus saying, “Women, thou shalt marry or you have hath a horrible life. Even though I’m God, clearly I can’t use single women.” 🤷♀️
Day-um!!! Going there!! I will SO vote to end that farce. So, I'm forced to subsidize their right to restrict my freedoms and scream about how awful I am? And they think that will last forever (or at least until the Rapture) because Jeezus? Bite me, fools, you're going down.
Man his take is so inconsiderate of people who would like to be married but for whatever reason haven’t found their person yet. It broke my spirit to be rejected by the young men in the churches I frequented in part bc of the pressure I felt to make this marriage thing happen. These days I’m a 29 year old single witch with two cats and I’m thriving 😂
I’m a single, early 30-something year old single woman who has the best time with my dog. One thing these old folgies don’t bother to see and understand is that atleast with animals, they actually treat you with love, compassion and are loyal to you. They also 99.9% of the time relieves your stress too. And if you have an animal that has a protective nature, they also bring you security as well. Something most men these days don’t do for women.
This is purely anecdotal, but I spent my teenage years looking for someone who would love me, then went to college, did an international student exchange, and told myself I was *not* going to fall in love, I was going to be doing everything in my power not to - because I was expecting that I'd never get to see that person again and I would only break my heart... I've been married for 5 years to the guy I fell in love with during that exchange. I've come to believe it's easier to find a person you can really connect with when you're not actively trying, because you're not wearing any masks or trying to impress and you're being more authentically you. The heart does really weird and sometimes stupid things (the long-distance relationship wasn't easy in the beginning and we've had a lot of culture clashes) and in the end you have to live life the way you see fit. I wish you the best of luck with your cats.
They hate single women that doesn't prioritizes marriage, AND YET they act like their wives stole their happiness in life and being passive aggressive about being married and their wives 🤣🤣🤣🤣.... Like they really wondering why women choose to be single and not married when they act like that🤣🤣🤣
46:26 I **despise** that he told his daughters to marry someone who can't live without them, not someone they can't live without like he told the boys. It completely undermines the importance of their own desires (and perhaps safety, let's be real here), and truly demonstrates he actually believes a man's desires are the most important factor. Disgusting and terrifying.
I was looking for this comment… not to mention he makes it seem like his daughters should think that a boy having an obsession towards them is a positive thing and NOT a red flag
Men do not understand love. They confuse benefits with love. If you ask them why they love her, they will list the benefits she provides. Never have I heard objective things about her personality that a guy likes, like she is unique or super smart or funny. Objective qualities of a woman are never even registered, that’s the leading cause of female depression, never getting witnessed for your qualities in a society of enemies who only prey on you. And women usually do not talk about it either because all they will do is use this information to manipulate someone innocent and trap them for personal benefits. Women are individuals with only enemies all around, so they are basically completely alone in this world.
Wow, i didn't even catch that bit within the whole awfulness. Wow. Yeah. “sit here and wait until a man decides you're the one“...... YIKES. I hope his daughters can find their way out of his toxic cult.
As a child, my mom left me and my stepmom abused me. My dad was kind, but he allowed the abuse. By age 13 I decided never to marry or have kids. I became a successful artist and writer, and I dont regret my decision to stay unmarried. In fact I am very happy. People like this pastor dont seem to realise that people have different life circumstances that influence how they live, we are not all cookie cutter nor should we be. Thx guys, you did a great video ❤
@@LattePunch It's because cats are female-coded and dogs are male-coded (and I'm only half-joking). Cats aren't submissive the way dogs are, which pisses off guys like Mork who want everything in their life (especially women and animals) to be subservient to him.
Funny how the same people who panic about the 50 % divorce rate are the same ones who insist that marriage will inherently bring every person happiness that they could never know as a single person. Imagine preaching a 100% satisfaction rate for a product that 50% of customers returned lmao
Yeah and those are just the people who get divorced, let's not forget to factor in all the people who remain in unhappy and truly toxic marriages, of which there are a lot. I consider those failures as well. So it's probably more like 75%. Yikes.
For 40 years, my parents were "co-rulers". My mom was, and still is, a Christian but didn't push her beliefs on us children, and my dad was a die hard atheist. Then, about 4 years ago, my dad "found Jesus" and started believing in God, and their marriage took such a drastical turn. Suddenly, my mom had to agree with everything my dad said and any decision he made for them and the family. If she disagreed or went against him, he would get livid and bully her into submission. He started controlling every aspect of her life, what she did,, when and where she went out, what she ate... And when I pointed it out, I became enemy number one and soon was disowned from the family. I liked him better as an atheist.
He's right. If you marry young, put in your time as a homemaker, accommodate a husband's particularities as his helpmeet, you will still end up alone at 50, HOWEVER, your cats will eat better because of the alimony.
Until I meet someone who will NOT make my life harder, I will happily be single. This pastor literally just wants us all to be as miserable as him. He literally started out stating how his wife was his #1 opp....YIKES! IS he happy? Not convinced, bud. Yeesh!!!
As a 59 year old single mom, I’m happier than I was when I lived with my man baby ex. I’m good, thanks pastor. I have my friends and my B.O.B. when I feel frisky.
Mmm tension relief! You go girl! You will likely do much better without a second grown child to take care of… Also a 59 yo single gal although my daughter is out of the house and doing the dual income no kids thing with her partner. Cheers!
Exactly sis! I'm always perplexed by the "single childless woman will be old, cold, and alone!" trope. Like, do none of the folks making this assertion account for choosen family, extended family, brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces, ther communities these woman choose to be a part of? Oh no? Because rhey didn't pop out little carbon copies like they did they became so paralyzed by their own depression and loneliness they couldn't bare to leave the house! Biiiitch, please. 😂
Sixty two here......love the saying......B O B is great....never complains....always ready when I am.....and no worries of STD's 😉 Single life is wonderful 😌
I'm a single woman in my late 30s I often get told how miserable I am and how good I could have had it if I had married. I'm often accused of promiscuity, STIs and abortions. One of the most ironic comments was that I'd have a house now if I married. No, I'd have a house now if I bought one instead of using my resources to get my brother, his wife, and their two kids into a home instead.
Whenever I hear sermons like this, it makes me feel better about being single. I am a single dude in his mid-30's and I am happy with my life. If I end up finding someone in the future then awesome and I will pursue it but if I don't then I know I will be okay.
If I'm thinking of the same tiktok, the "childless" woman said she didn't have kids "yet". Never said she never intended to or tried to convince anyone else not to. It was just a young woman stating the benefits of being young and without kids. The horror
That reminds me of a meme I saw once with a picture of a mom, dad and kids that said something like, 'They can't have this, so they want to make sure you can't have it either " Now, I'm a single guy with no kids. I sometimes think I'd like to be married with kids, other times not. Either way, I would never want to take that away from anyone else, and I was horrified that anyone would think that about me for being single and childless.
I think I like the term "child free" more than "child less" Because the second one implies that something is missing, that there is a lack of something, and that's not true! We are so much more than what we don't have/don't want
That's the whole problem with public discourse atm. You say you love pancakes then someone comments, so you hate waffles? Dude that's not the same thing at all!
46 divorced single woman with 2 kids. Only miserable/horrible part of my life? The ex husband. I don’t have to deal with family antics or drama, I sleep in peace (PRICELESS), and can develop the friendships I desire…when I desire them. I don’t have to babysit any man or hand hold their emotional immaturity…. I know a lot of my married friends at this stage of life are struggling with being married. Not necessarily their mate - but institution of marriage. hmmm who is happier?
I am a 65 yr old single male. I have never been married nor do I have (or want) kids. I knew from a young age that I was not a "kid person" and was never keen on getting married. I have a great life! I have a good income, have traveled the world, live in a nice house and have a female friend who I am in a "friend with benefits" relationship. Life is good. And no, Mr Driscoll, I am not "lazy" nor "immature". I am living my life on MY terms.
My mother was married and still worked late. Not everybody has scummy pastor wife money. And she is also still deeply unhappy due to her marriage. At one point we were discussing my life choices, of staying in my parents' house instead of being in debt for 30 years for a 45 sqm apartment like the rest of the country, of remaining single, of not wanting children, of having investments, of not taking any shit from employers and knowing my rights. And she said in a small voice that if she could go back in time, she'd do the same. When anyone comments that any one of my cousins who are almost 30 yo isn't married, she always says "good".
50 years old, atheist, child-free, single woman here. I work the hours I choose at a job that is fulfilling to me. If I work late, it is because I am really excited about what I am doing. No cats. Never had an STD. Not lonely living alone. In fact, I feel a bit crowded after someone stays with me for a few days. At Christmas, I visit with friends and family. It is a FAR more enjoyable and less stressful holiday than when I was married.
Plus, he acts like you would be incapable of finding anyone at age 50 if you did want a partner. He frames this like you have to find someone in your twenties or you are done. He's a fool.
@@AbstractpossomThat's a bunch of bunk. Nearly all of my wife's friends were divorced and in their 40s. But now all of them are partnered up. One is married again and another is engaged. There are plenty of good people out there at every age.
@@Abstractpossom That's bunk. My wife's primary friends group are all in their 40s to early 50s. Just how it worked out, most are divorced. But every single one of them has found a significant other, a couple are now remarried, and one engaged. Why? Because good and interesting people find other good and interesting people. It ain't that complicated. There are plenty of great men and women out there looking for other great men and women.
All the data I've seen says single women without kids are happier. And they have updated info after years. Older women without kids or a husband have less life regrets than married mothers.
This makes me want to punch my head through a wall. Been married for 10 years. Never experienced anything that Mark is talking about. The fact that so many people are listening to him like he is preaching the best truths of life makes me so sad. It’s going to cause so much damage to these peoples lives😢
I agree. I’ve never been married and I never plan to be, but nothing Mark said has been true for any of the married couples I’ve known/been around. Not my parents, not my parent’s parents, not any of my friends or their families… I think Mark speaks from purely his own experience, and it sounds like a miserable life he’s living.
Same! 12 years and I'd actually say it's pretty easy. We have so much fun together. I would never want to marry if I had what this guy is talking about.
Funniest shit. I am absolutely everything this guy hates. Atheist, vegan, feminist, anti-racist, anti-capitalist etc. He'd call me a "beta cuck" or worse. And yet I'm in a wonderful marriage with a woman I love deeply and a wonderful daughter that will never have so little self esteem that she would even think about dating a creep like that guy. And it's so easy and effortless. My secret? My wife's my partner, not my servant.
100% yes. Only the godliest men can endure marriage, obviously. (Weird.. almost like getting married as young as possible because you’re saving sex for marriage and can’t hold out any longer makes for a bad match..)
I enjoy ya'lls commentary, also you guys give me a little hope by showing me that there are men who treat women as their equal. It's quite lovely seeing you guys taking, he takes you seriously, lets you talk, actually listens and thinks about what you're saying, and lots of eye contact and genuine interest in what you're saying. I know it's the bare minimum but I literally never see this and have never experienced this with any man I've ever interacted with, which is extremely depressing especially since I have a dad and two brothers, I'm used to being talked over, ignored, and disbelieved by men. Also seeing how you guys lovingly look at each other even after 10 years? Adorable.
Whether a person is lonely living without a permanent partner is completely dependent upon their personality. You can be forever single, religious or not, male or female, reach 50, and feel completely isolated or completely free. Its not this guy's place to tell anyone else how they are going to feel.
Honestly, 7 cats sounds like less hassle than a conservative husband. I'd open a shelter for the critters, they're cute and they don't give you any problems
Wasn't there a study that showed that single women were happier and had a better quality of life than women married to men? And it was reversed for men married to women (they had it better than single men). That definitely makes sense looking at the bigger picture too, and I'm not convinced the results would have been drastically different if they had taken gay couples into account tbh, I feel like we really overestimate the value of being in a romantic relationship. For some people it's the best decision of their life, for others, they're just not made for it. Or maybe what's right for them is either being single or being in a relationship but not living together/committing to a lesser degree (and thus, still having freedom and being your own person). There's a lot of pressure to be (or at least seek to be) in a relationship (and then have kids ideally) so it's difficult to see whether it's something we actually desire or just something we think we have to do. Those convervative men complain about their wives all the time, but I doubt they would be able to even eat correctly without them. Their wives would probably be fine though. The reason they push for marriage and try to give the impression that they're doing women a favor - and that it's women who desire marriage, not men - is a clever manipulation. Those men are the ones who need marriage, but they try to reverse psychology the whole thing (and, unfortunately, they're still winning for now, though they did lose a bit of power) to be sure women will say yes despite sometimes knowing on some level it'll make them miserable.
Yeah, that study definitely does exist, I’ve seen it. Another thing to consider is the methodology of the study. I wonder if the people they surveyed had their spouses there with them; there are definitely some people who would say they are more happy married if their spouse was looking over their shoulder or present at the time. Not saying that’s the case, but it’s something that can have an effect.
@@VWHybridAbsolutely true, though it'd be a fatally flawed study if the questions were asked with the spouse present. That's not to say that people haven't screwed up studies....
@@martinmckee5333 Indeed. When I took Statistics and Psychology classes in Uni they went over a ton of examples where it looked like the numbers from a study obviously said one thing, and then they revealed what the conditions of the study were and it changed the results completely. It was a good way to open your eyes to the blind spots in statistics and not take for granted that the studies were done under good circumstances for accurate results. It’s really easy to get the results that back up your viewpoint if you don’t mind using less than ideal circumstances for unbiased answers. Who you survey, where you survey, and how you survey makes all the difference.
@@VWHybrid oh definitely, regardless of the study, looking at its methodology is crucial. It's not always easy to access though. I hadn't even thought about the survey being answered with the spouses present, I assumed the issue - if there is one - would maybe come from a non-representative sample.
Yeah, and let's not forget that the study he invoked still implies that more married women are unhappy than are happy. 40% of married women reporting happiness means that there's 60% who reported unhappiness.
I feel Driscoll would be absolutely flabbergasted by you guys. A healthy, happy relationship between a non believing, progressive couple and no children? They must be secretly miserable and depressed. I had a pastor like Driscoll, and that was always his excuse.
It amazes me how the people who seem to be unhappily married are the ones telling everyone else to get married. Everyone's different. Some people want to get married, others enjoy being single. Some people want kids, others don't. Not everyone has to take the exact same path in life.
He's making some very valid points here! As a women myself, just look at history. Look at all the wars we've caused and the endless suffering and destruction we have brought! Oh, wait.......
I can honestly say that my marriage feels as easy as breathing - why would you get married to someone you constantly fight with?! If your marriage is the hardest thing you've ever done, maybe you're married to the wrong person?
I love it when someone who has only known one woman his entire life but thinks he’s experienced enough to give advice to everyone on women and relationships. Dude, you’re an expert in your specific woman and your specific relationship. If that’s what you want I’m super happy for you. Just stop pretending you are some expert in women.
Clearly he doesn't even know what his OWN wife wants. He is unhappy in his marriage, and wants to project that onto everyone else so they share the same woes. Misery loves company.
Everything I ever heard from Christian pastors is how hard marriage is. Literally no one told us we would be happily married but they all wanted us to get married
As an almost-50, single, childless woman, I'm still waiting for the "horrible" to begin.
😂
@@theantibot❤Jesus power ❤ All black and white sheep will receive ( level 1) portion of youth longevity digestion an self beauty Jesus energy wash tonight at(
( 11 07 ) eastren. Negative energy will creep out yr feet tell it's time. Starting now
I'm single, turning 55 this year. Horrible is nowhere in sight!
I'm 7 years your senior. Still not horrible. 😊
I’m 9 years your senior. Happier than a clam as a single mom!! I don't have a man baby to raise.
Saying that your wife is your "greatest challenge" and then having the nerve to say that single women will be the unhappy ones is a truely insane level of denial.
Yeah, I imagine she refers to him privately as her "cross to bear."
Right? That opening description sounds like a great life. He's totally clueless how many women are unhappy because of the men they married.
@@presentfuture7563 🤣Absolutely!
@@telpewen- All due to misogynistic types like him.
@@TheFirefishe well, even less misogynistic people than him can make their partner miserable. But yes, the socialization of men who expect their partners to do everything while they do nothing is also a part of misogyny, writ large.
The moral here: if you’re ever feeling sad that you’re single, ladies, just remember….you could be married to pastor Mark or Matt Walsh.
71 years old, single and lived on my own for the vast majority of my adult life. Very happy camper here. Would hate to have to live with another person. I get to do things my way and never have to compromise or ask for permission for anything. Wouldn't change a thing.
Excellent point!
Now that's hysterical 🤣
So far single for 20 years post divorce and loving it. The remote is all mine and so is my money 😬
😂
Youre not lonely. Youre just bored
"you will be the happiest if you get married and have kids"
"Your wife will make you miserable"
Makes sense 😂
Fr haha 😭
Right? Which one is it? Pick a lane.
The math ain't mathing 😅
And he didn't get it
Exactly that’s because people like mark teach and preach to people that in order to be happy and fulfilled and be in align with God you need to be married.if that’s the only reason why you are married then deep down you are going to be miserable.Even though people like him preach that marriage is the best thing that you should do.
If I have seven cats when I'm 50 and live with nobody else, I will have succeeded in life.
I guess I haven’t succeeded, because I don’t even have one cat. They don’t allow cats at my apartment complex.
I mean, if you can afford to feed seven cats, you're definitely more than financially stable!
@@tonichan89 You have a point there
My wife and I have six cats. WTF is it about cats that people have?
Good luck when your knees go out, when you can’t get out of bed, when you can’t afford meds, when you have no one to help you. Good luck being elderly and alone. You’ll change your tune.
My grandma lost her husband when she was in her 40s. She was a very Christian woman, but decided she was happier not marrying again, living alone, travelling the world, and enjoying her independence. She was quite conservative, went to church, knitted for charity, etc. However she told me that she saw no benefit to getting married again and having a man make her do everything for him, when she can just live her own life. She saw that marriage wasn't equal for her, so she opted out. I respected that.
It was pretty much the same for my grandma.
Almost like that's the reason why men who are married are happier? They have it made for them!
Some studies, perhaps like the one the pastor was referencing would have ignored your grandmother and would only have taken people who are still currently married into consideration along with people who had never married.
In other words these studies sometimes ignore anyone who has been marrying previously and either lost their partner or decided to get divorced. That’s a large percentage of people to ignore in your study.
If you look you’ll find studies that contradict the results he quotes and even studies that aren’t so clear cut like ones that say children do bring great joy but also great stress and sadness so working out if having children results in a net positive or negative when it comes to overall happiness is very difficult. This means people may report either way depending how they feel when they are asked.
Iconic behavior honestly 🎉
I find it so interesting that Christianity shows this perspective of the woman of service to the man. It's bonkers to me that any modern man would allow this. As a man, I don't want my wife to ever walk away from me and have a negative view of marriage. I also don't want a woman to serve me but I do want reciprocation. What I do for her she does for me. But in this dating world today that's even hard to find as well. A lot of trust issues out here which is fair but it is what it is. I just hate the negative view of marriage.
"I wouldn't wanna live with someone who can dominate me. I'd be scared"
"Women are only happy if they live with someone who can dominate them"
😂 I cannot deal with this dude
*addition cause I don't wanna edit:
These are not exact quotes, but simplified/summed up ideas of statements that were said minutes apart lol
Duh because women are a different species, we don't have brains like he does /s
@@ЧёяКтоя I low key think he actual believes that
He speaks out of his toxic mentality.
That part really jumped out at me! He just spent a while describing how women are "weaker vessels" and all that, then just flat admits that he'd be terrified of a marriage where those roles were reversed. Well, what if women would also be afraid to be in a relationship with someone they were aware could beat them up? Somehow, though, he doesn't seem to think women should be sleeping with protective gear on. Truly a mystery! /s
Interesting how he speaks to his children about marriage... for the boys: marry the one you can't live without. For the girls: marry the one who can't live without you. It's a subtle distinction, but he's made it passive for the girls. Marriage is something boys choose, but for girls it's just something that happens to you. It's not about what she wants, it's about what some dude wants from her.
This is a great point! I didn’t catch on to that when we reacted to it, but I think you’re completely right.
Or he meant to marry someone who loves them more than they do so they wouldnt be stuck with bad boys who use them for their body and then leave. But its also dangerous cause once his daughters are done and want to seperate these dudes can turn abusive real quick.
As he wonders why 40 percent of millennials don't believe in marriage.
I thought the exact same. It sounds like regurgitated “Wild at Heart” garbage
I don't think that's quite it, I don't see one of those as passive and one as active, you can take just as much of an active role in finding someone who can't live without you as you can in finding someone you can't live without.
I think the difference is that he takes it for granted that a woman can't live without a man, so that's true either way.
60 plus year old female, here. never married and never wanted to be married. Never had an STD, never had an abortion because I know how birth control works, Not a virgin and don't have a cat. No debts, no bills I didn't create, car is paid for, and I do my own laundry. Why should I be unhappy again?
Nice sentiment but remember people get pregnant using birth control all the time!
@MiniM69 not very likely at 60+
Because you have no cats 😔😔😔 (jk)
You're my idol! ❤
@z0rrofan9 I hope to be like you as I get older. Currently 38, unmarried, childfree, never been pregnant because my longterm FWB is vasectomized. Like you, I've never had an STD, have no cats but do have 3 snakes, have been debt free since age 34, own my car, have a business degree, and been gainfully self-employed for the last 2 years. I'm an atheist and help out at my local community food pantry and SPCA.
All this despite growing up as a Jehovah Witness, dealing with that religious abuse for years, and leaving my parents home alone in 11th grade. Supposedly I should be utterly miserable, have baby rabies, and be yearning for marriage. Obviously that's the opposite case 😂
Speaking as a man who's been married longer than Mark Driscoll; I could NEVER have married a woman who was capable of being easily dominated. My wife is the strongest woman I know. She's been told by MANY men that they could never "deal" with her if she was their wife. She's always said that wasn't a problem because that never would have happened.
I'm not dominated by her either. We're both people with strong opinions and wills. We get each other.
Smart man. My sons are married. I am not against it. Tried it, didn't work. Not looking for men who need mother figures.😁 Not even looking. I have better things to do.😁
Excellent! Yes
Heh. We're hitting 22 years married in a week. My wife and I are, for sure, equals.
Oh. And as for the contract (marriage), we only bothered to get married because it has significant tax advantage and it makes everything in life bureaucratically easier.
We got married because of the parents. A wallflower woman would have had me bored in a week. If a woman actually said to me "I will defer to you because your the man" I likely would say "what the F*&^% is wrong with you, are you CRAZY??" Likewise I've seen marriages where the woman was the OPPOSITE of a wallflower and that wouldn't wash either. Seems to work for them and their fellas, more power to them.
👏👏👏 good for you!
Alone and with seven cats!? Don’t threaten me with a good time, Markie.
I grew up in a fundie family:
My “perfect” older sister is married with three kids and they will never be able to own their own home because she is married to a man-child who wants more kids than they have the bandwidth or money for. She is always tired and stressed; the “traditional Christian life” is going great for her /s.
My golden child little brother isn’t quite the golden child anymore because my parents finally realized they did a crummy job preparing him for the world and he’s still living at home with mummy and daddy at close to 30 years old and has no plans for moving out anytime soon.
And I am the black-sheep “failure” of an atheist who is the only one among all my siblings to own my own home, have a stable job, have pets (yes, cats), and be actually happy with my current lot in life.
Childfree single living is the best life I could ever have chosen, and I’m happier than I ever was living under a Christian roof.
Edit:a typo
🙌🏼🤘🏻💪🏼
Good for you, that you managed to have a stable life and that you are happy, childhood must have been hard. I hope that you don't judge Jesus according to your family, He is the One giving and loving freedom.
Lol they tend to loose their damn minds when women say 'dont threaten me with a good time'
Which is why I say it as often as I can the moment I detect them parroting the sorta bs that Driscoll puts out.
@@prisca5Please don't push your religion on others. It can be quite traumatic.
"and has no plans for moving out anytime soon."
And it's important in your culture for him to move out? Shouldn't one of the children stay at home and take care for parents and grandparents if there's enough space in the flat?
"Those sad old nagging wives, amirite, folks?"
"Yes, this is why I'm happy to be childfree and single"
"NO! YOU LIE! You can only be happy as a wife! 😡"
"Marriage is the best thing that ever happened to me! The fact I am constantly posting old jokes about being chained to my wife and how I'm punished by her for not following her whims while commenting 'SO TRUE' is completely beside the point."
"Dude you are literally blinking SOS while you're drinking at your one boy's night out each month!"
"NAH, you don't understand my single friend, trust me. A wife is all you need, and your weird for not getting married yet"
To myself, "Its cause I don't want to be *you or twice divorced Dave* when I'm 40. Let me figure out how best to manage my own ship first as a part of that first.
It's cus they want to have their cake and eat it too.
They want to be waited on, but they want the labor to be undervalued so they can get it for cheaper.
It's the big unspoken scheme of patriarchy. And it maps pretty well onto an economic comparison you might recognize.
If men can form a monopoly and become the only real game in town, they can reduce wages further and further and make people work longer and longer and keep greater profits for themselves.
Simply because there are no alternatives to compete with them.
But now more and more women have unionized and been negotiating for better treatment.
So of course men are disingenuously responding that "but if we increace wages and benefits, the whole company will go out of buisness!!"
When no. It literally just means a few million less dollars in ceo pockets while literally everything else improves.
Same as it was when businesses said ending child labor would cause the fall of civilization. When instead it both increased standards of living and helped drive some of the biggest economic booms in world history.
Men only see the short term of it being cheaper to abuse and manipulate women into doing his bidding for very little reward.
But by doing this he sacrifices long term stability because his greed is preventing him from investing in the relationship.
And out of even greater greed, they'll complain that their short term strategies aren't giving them long term investment rewards.
Even though when actually quizzed, they're fully aware they would neither accept such treatment themselves, nor expect the strategies to work in other similar contexts.
So really at this point they just don't want to admit defeat and are trying to punish the victors by being a bunch of sore losers on the way out.
@@nomobobby all my alimony & $4K/month child support-paying friends think I'm a weirdo for not getting married nor having kids, that are spoiled brats or not. Yeah. I'm wrong. L ALSO, just get a secret vasectomy, never-the-less women you slept with will come after you for paternity. DNA testing the child should be routine, it isn't like it is painful, except to the government trying to pin all this on non-biological 'fathers' who were duped. Estimates range up to 30% false paternity in certain regions.
@@bryck7853 Quite the hot take for you to crow about getting a “secret vasectomy” while implying that women are generally deceitful and conniving.
One of the motivators for their disgust is likely jealousy. That they grew up in a world that convinced them it was the only way to be happy, and then the new way of life comes and demonstrates other ways, and they hate to see it. Like the meme of the grouchy woman with a bunch of screaming toddlers seething about those "pretty single girls".
It always fascinates me that the men who will insist they have the best advice about marriage also seem to greatly dislike their wives, and women in general.
If they dislike women so much, why don’t they preach the joys of eternal bachelorhood?
@@valerietaylor9615 because then they couldn't claim the martyrdom of marriage. This pastor speaks about his wife as if she's a never ending Sicyphian trial that he must push uphill, instead of a partner helping him push. That's not someone who loves his spouse, that's someone who glories in being seen as a martyr laid across the altar of marriage.
@Fenomka That hadn’t occurred to me, but it should have. It perfectly describes my mother’s attitude to her marriage.
@@valerietaylor9615 You can hate women but still like the benefits of having a traditional housewife. That’s the reason why so many of them get married. They want to have children but they don’t want to be the one raising them. They want to have a house but they don’t want to actually cook and clean to have a good domestic life. They want to sleep with women but they don’t actually want to find them.
Or its a grift and he's not even married.
I think it’s very important to ask the unmarried, childless people WHY they’re less happy, because why is the assumption that getting married and having kids would fix whatever is wrong with their life? As someone who is unmarried, childless, and unhappy, I can tell you that getting married would only make my life worse. I need a therapist, not a goddamn kid to take care of when I can barely take care of myself.
Exactly, these conservatives love to point out that women without children are more likely to be mentally ill, but they never stop to consider that maybe mentally ill women are just more likely to choose not to have kids, and for damn good reason.
Yeah, like maybe people who are happy and outgoing are more likely to be in relationships and get married, leading to them being more likely to have kids....and maybe depressed people are more likely to stay home alone, leading down a rabbithole of more depression and loneliness. Maybe those happy fathers were also more happy before they were father's?
@@marlenaneedham3818it could also be contributed to by financial capabilities as well as most people tend to wait until after they are more financially secure to marry and have kids.
Also being able to afford to treat mental health issues like depression and anxiety tend to help you in getting into a position to even get a long term partner
Yeah, someone I know mocked people that got a cat instead of a child to "baby" and I said: Would you rather have them birth a baby to "ruin"?
Babying a cat is one thing, you can vent your motherimpulses on it and that is very wise in comparison to having babies. Cats don't mind being babied, but babies need a whole lot of care and you will ruin a life if you do it wrong.
Let those cat/dog/pet-lovers be responsible.
Anybody else just kind of annoyed by Mark Driscoll describing his (hypothetical) daughter lashing out after being trapped in a (hypothetical) abusive marriage as "Her trying to dominate [her husband] and becoming manipulative", thus being responsible for escalating her own abuse? Gotta love that victim-blaming! 🙄🙄
As a 31yo woman who's never been married or in relationships I feel a liitle joy every time my existence upset garbage people. I see that as an absolute win.
You: does absolutely nothing
Them: why dont you get married? You must be so sad rn! I mean, living with my wife is basically hell for me and I don't treat her that well but why dont you want this too???
A good life is the best revenge.
Agreed they hate it. Their pride and ego even shows in church I don't know why misogynists try to associate themselves with God but misogyny and bigotry is a form of hatred it's damned because it's hatred it's something the devil puts in their heads by making them think it's God talking to them.
It's not something God wants for women it's something men want for women.
God may have commanded women to submit to her husband but he did not command her to submit to an abuser. It says submit to the one you love if you can't find love then don't get married. Just be loyal to God. You can still get in there if your single his son was single too, especially if you had impairments he doesn't damn women for things that are out of there control I'm sure even he knows that a lot of men are messed up in the head and no longer capable of loving women that way anyways so it wouldn't make sense to get married at a time like this when men just want to use and discard women.
As a happily married woman (no kids), I LOVE seeing you guys upset society so much! Keep at it, ladies! 😀
YOLO sistsr👍
Says “many young men are not marrying”…. Proceeds to only blame the women.
The truth is, that folks are waiting longer before entering into that contract. I'm unsure why evangelicals are freaking out that people are taking a more prudent approach to marriage and avoiding it until they are truly adults.
@t0dd000 how dare you claim that the way *they* did things might not be the one and only way to do the thing, thereby insinuating that they would have had a choice!! /s 😅
Why shouldn’t they? There is a huge risk for men because woman will destroy a man and take everything they ever worked for because they’re mad. If I were a man, I’d never marry either. As long as woman are getting paid to be awful, cheat, and abuse the system with divorce, men should not get married
@@t0dd000 The single greatest predictor of divorce is the age at which people get married. Waiting until you’re older to marry dramatically decreases the likelihood of divorcing
Well derp. Of course it is the woman’s fault. EVERYTHING is our fault according to the shallow, fragile man.
😢😢😢 Single Women are so lonely without a family during Christmas. What? No There’s no such thing as parents, grandparents, cousins, siblings or nephews to visit during Christmas for dinner. No no no, the only thing that exist is a husband and children. Friends!? What is that? Some woke bullshit? There’s no such thing as “friends”
When I was living with my ex, we hosted 8 for Christmas dinner. Non of us lived close to family so we got together, ate food, drank and played board games all day. Christmas isn't just for kids and families 💚
He's just making up his own narrative clearly lol or that may be how it goes for HIM if he's single, and he's projecting. Just saying, guys don't usually organize holidays well, so he would probably be alone or waiting for an invite to someone else's celebration. But that's on him, lol
Absolutely true.
Also the way that you said it is so funny, ty for making me smile.😊😊
My husband and I lived far away from family and couldn’t be home for Christmas. We had a great time with others who were in the same position.
As a 38 single childless woman I wish that were true. I hate Christmas. But my family...and my friends...with their family...want me around. They cannot fathom someone Not liking christmas and prefering beeing alone
I'd love to be in a happy marriage. Too bad when I was a devout Christian my husband tried to strangle me so I left. 🙄 Far happier now than I ever was in my "godly marriage."
I’m glad you made it out alive. ❤
I flinch when I hear the 'godly' adjective used. It's a preemptive compensation for something horrendous.
Wow! Powerful comment. I am glad you left!
@@friskeysunset not if you use it correctly. "I took a godly dump this morning" is a pretty good use of the adjective.
If being married is "really, really difficult" for Mark, maybe he's just really, really bad at being married.
57 yo never married no kids ZERO regrets. men like driscoll IS why i chose it. thank you for validating my decision.
I'm so happy for you!!
58, same!
Queen you are king it ❤
This may be nit-picking, but for a fella who claims to preach traditional old school masculinity, he is wearing a ballcap indoors... in a church no less. Smh
Well, Mark is covering up his hairline, which is as thin as his talking points.
It might be nit picky but I'm petty enough to agree
I’m bald and I wear hats indoors. Head gets cold. People with hair have complained to me about wearing a hat indoors. Fuck them. Shave your head and then yell at me
@@alexwyatt2911 His hair isn't thinning, it's gone south for the winter.
@@christasimon9716 As well as the summer, fall, and spring.
As a feminist, I just want people to do what brings them joy, whether they want to get married and have 8 kids, be single forever, or whatever works for them.
Marriage was super hard with my first husband because it was not a healthy relationship. Marriage isn’t hard in a healthy relationship, it rules to live with my best friend. He’s my favorite.
I wanted kids. I have kids. I would die for my kids. I don’t enjoy parenting. I struggle with it a lot. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Nobody should do it unless they really really want to. Also, adding kids to a relationship where the parents aren’t equal partners would be hell.
I’ve gone back and forth a lot on whether I want kids. I’ve landed pretty firmly into the childfree camp, and reframing it to whether I want to be a parent was a huge step in that. Thank you for sharing 🩵
And I would add that children should be included as a partner in the parenting of them to a degree from my own experience with my mother and her authoritative parenting style she had focused on giving me the skills and tools I needed to be able to understand and articulate my feelings and emotions and even though she didn’t always agree with my point of view and she had the final say she would make it her life mission to make sure I understood why I was being punished or her thought process to be honest I think she focused more on that and it really upset her to see me cry because of what she did, or anyone in the family did
I agree entirely with everting you said! I’m also happy that you have a great relationship with your husband and your honestly about being a parent. I’m a single 26 year old who lives at home child free. I appreciate that you shared your experience
100%
I think the tough stuff of parenting should be allowed to be stated. Finding it tough gets used to imply not loving children. But reality is that love and challenge can go together. If people had more freedom to be honest then those new to parenting and finding it is not some magical wonder, would not feel alone or a failure
I’m a 49 year old single, childless, pet less woman, I just got my scuba license, I have flight benefits to fly around the world to dive and vacation. I just ran a 10k and I’m training for a 1/2 marathon. Ohhh but I feel I’m going to miserable really soon! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
oh, you will be when you realize how much you've missed by not cleaning up behind a man, taking care of kids who are vomiting all night, and getting mansplained about everything you do. YOU'LL SEE. . .
Single women live longer than married women. Wonder why?
Single women and married men are the happiest people.
Single women with no children are happiest. Married men with children are happiest. Notice how these are diametrically opposed.
"Married females are still living the longest with a gap to singles of 3.5-5.5 years." from
The effect of marital status on life expectancy: Is cohabitation as protective as marriage?
Stress.
@@williamsstephens Nope - bachelors tend to be happier on the whole as we are not burdened with the nonsense of monogamy!
If anything is destroying America it’s the energy this dude is putting out there. Compassion mr pastor, compassion.
Compassion isn't available to those who, like Driscoll, are completely devoid of empathy.
@@kayanneyoung9788 you make an excellent point. I think they are still capable but it’s buried. In Buddhism there’s this idea that instead of us being born in original sin we are innately noble, but through life the mud of circumstances, programming, etc covers things up. That we have to return back to our innate goodness. Maybe he’s got a lot of mud covering up that compassion? I wish you well friend
@Stillness-Now you're based! Love the Buddhist framing of our natural state, because it (mostly) actually reflects truth instead of dogma. It also just brings so much more positivity into the world instead of the depressing idea of original sin and humans being chronically unworthy.
@@wsheasley agreed
@@Stillness-Now this is so beautiful
i really dislike how he constantly call his wife, a grown woman, a 'girl'.
Infantilization of women is so common for evangelical Christians. It’s genuinely nauseating.
It really shows where his mental age is at lol.
I feel like there are so many legit things you could have picked 😂. That could just be a preference they both share
Right? 🤮
@@brianfarley1056 I get the feeling her preferences don’t really matter to him.
It annoys me to no end, when women are always described as "someone's". NO!
She is someone!
Always describing women (and children) in relation to others, rather than as their own person shows, that these people see women as less than human.
And insisting on calling grown women "girls" is just disgusting.
It’s very infantilizing, like women are children that need guidance and parenting by a husband
They see us as property, hence the degrading language.
I recently watched a video in which a man said that a woman belongs first to God, then her husband.
This is the attitude. They don't want women to have any agency at all.
I have many Indian friends, and they refer to all unmarried adults as “boys” and “girls”. And even in the U.S., young unmarried men were often referred to as “boys” in the 1920s and 30s. Young white men, not just blacks. And there is a Gershwin song “Boy Wanted”, from the musical “Primrose”, in which the heroine describes her ideal man, or boy. And the characters were young adults in their twenties, not teenagers. “Primrose” had its premiere in 1924, in case anyone is wondering.
They are narcissists....
What gets me is the part where he says he dosent want a woman that can take him. He described a scenario where he was afraid to go to sleep. Which is the actual reality for many victims of domestic violence. They trivialize such horrible things to make their point.
His kind usually do want a woman to take care of them. Maybe he just doesn’t want to admit it.
Gotta say hating women then wondering why they don't like you is a bold choice for them to take.
It worked go as long as 'liking' was superceded by 'needing to survive'. Shoe, meet other foot.
Being a single mom is really difficult. You know what's even more difficult? Being a parent in a toxic marriage. We all have to make choices, everyone has their own unique situation. Knowing if someone has kids or is married is not enough information to know why they are happy or unhappy.
That's true. It really sucks to have kids with someone that's not good for you or the kids, but you can't leave..... :/
Being a single mother is not at all inherently difficult. Being a parent in any scenario may be difficult, but it is just silly to claim that being unpartnered automatically makes being a parent difficult.
@@bevwinn1369statically financially and how soceity treats unpartner parents and married parents is different I'm not sure what you thought you were defending but your comment at worst is objectively wrong at minimum selfishly offensive
@@Saint_Medusa nope. It is not objectively wrong to say being a single parent is not INHERENTLY difficult. Statistics do not show that being unpartnered AUTOMATICALLY makes being a parent difficult. How you can find that offensive, much less selfish, is puzzling.
I hate how when he talks about a women fighting back against a controlling husband he jumps straight to saying
"Shes trying have dominion over him" and not her just trying to be treated like a human. Idk, really weird
Sounds like justifying abuse to me. I wonder if he even thinks husbands can be abusive.
@@artemisia4718 wouldn't be a shock.
As the spouse of a minister, I can tell you from experience, it’s never pleasant having your name invoked during a sermon. I can easily imagine what his wife is going through knowing that she will be the butt of numerous jokes as well as the subject of public examination with no forum in which to respond. If this man respected his wife, he wouldn’t bring her up like this during his sermon.
Not the man of the house eh?
@@mlthornton1 it might surprise you to learn there have been affirming denominations that recognize the solemnity of gay marriage since the 1980’s. I get the idea you assumed my spouse to be a woman.
It’s all men at my house.
If by “man of the house”, you mean one person who’s word is the law… No such person exists in my house.
In 30 years, there has never been a disagreement that could not be resolved through reasonable discussion. There has never been the need for one singular power holder.
@ericharris3568 not surprised exactly but yes that was not what I pictured. The times they are a changing
This guy is making people run from your religion .the best thing covid did was show millions that going to church is pointless. You should look at the studies it is wonderful Christianity is dying
You are the exception your book says you are less of a person and should not be able to teach but you just cherry pick your book
Oh no, a quiet Christmas with cats. Don't threaten me with a good time. 😂
If I met a person who said they can't live without me, I would run before I ended up in the back of a trunk or the bottom of a freezer. That is so freaking enmeshed and toxic.
This is wild lol. I got married and was a loving, supportive wife. I was abused, treated like garbage, then drug through the mud when I couldn't take it anymore. I am now divorced, my ex is on Megans law and has multiple felonies and misdemeanors. I'm much happier divorced. Misogony is toxic.
I'd rather have "7 cats and a couple of STDs" than be stuck in an unhappy marriage with kids.
I wouldn’t mind having seven cats, but I’d just as soon skip the STDs.
Usually the submissive faithful wife with a quiver full of children revived the recurrent std’s from their husband!
Can we compromise and have 4 cats and no stds?
STD's can be solved with antibiotics, and prevented with condoms. Be smart, opt for cats only.
Honestly, I think the STDs would be easier to manage than an asshole husband, and the cats are definitely easier than the kids.
I finally left my dysfunctional abusive "traditional" marriage after 20 years, taking nothing but a suitcase.
That was 6 years ago. I am alone by choice and I have never been happier and more at peace in my life. ❤
I am so happy for you! I wish you all the best in your new life ❤
What is this tongue in cheek traditional marriage put-down all about? As in, marriage is so 1950s, this is 2023 man?
Good thing you got out now because the far right wants to prevent women from leaving marriages in no fault divorce.
@@mlthornton1If you hadn't noticed, the conservatives have been making a bid deal about needing to go back to traditional marriage, and women need to be "tradwives".
They also want to be rid of no fault divorce and contraception.
@gilleruadh what!?! You're replying to state the obvious?
I’m not over the opening being “wow our wives really suck” and “how could single women ever be happy without men?!?!” at the same time lol
Mark “joking” that if he married a tough woman who could take him in a fight, he would sleep in a cup and helmet is so telling. He sees physical equality as a threat to *his* safety rather than being able to have the same trust he expects of his wife that he isn’t gonna hurt her while she’s sleeping. Quite the double standard there Marky Mark.
Yeah, I think he’s revealing that he knows how men use their physical strength against women and he assumes that physically strong women do the same thing to men. I think he really embodies that saying “men are afraid women will treat them the way they treat women.”
Someone should tell Mark about all the mysterious arsenic poisonings that used to befall married men before divorce was common...
Doesn't take much upper body strength to lift a vial, and you've got plenty of opportunities when you're barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen all day. So how safe is he really sleeping?
"all alone, with their cats."
As an introvert who is married...
My ideal night is literally being by myself, beneath a warm blanket. My two shadows (cats) sleeping in my lap. Losing track of time as I push through a good book.
How shallow that man's life must be to project onto single women that they are so sad and lonely. It is almost as if HE is lonely and sad if he doesn't have a woman telling him how great and wonderful he is.
And this paddle set, and that's all I need.
@@lorrainesmith.4995 Paul was really more like "Everybody should be celibate because that's just better, but if you can't control your carnal urges, at least get married so you can have sex in the most marginally acceptable way", or that's at least how I read that section.
I'm pretty sure dude was ace.
Agree!! Fortunately my husband and I are both introverted cat ppl, so we not infrequently sit under a blanket with our cat sitting on us being alone together. It’s great.
I quickly figured out the fear and demonization of single women or women who don't mind being single comes from deeply rooted in men (esp. narcissistic men) fear of rejection. Rejection ruins the grandiose sense of self and reminds how out of control they really are.
This is why we keep hearing the men built the world narrative that these men are using to cope.
Yep. Why don’t they attack men who choose to be single? Why don’t they attack incels like this? It’s so obviously laser targeted at white, European decendant women.
100% spot on
As a married mother of two in my 40s, this is the unhappiest I've ever been. And my husband doesn't suck and is a great father... but if we are only speaking of happiness, this isn't it.
No one deserves to be happy. And you cant make it either.
@@zapkvrI'm sorry you feel that way. I hope things get better for you, truly. No one should go through life believing they don't deserve to be happy.
@@zapkvrhomie really out here admitting he's miserable, and stating that because he's miserable, everyone else should be too☠️☠️☠️ fucked up.
Girl you can still choose happiness. I did and it's extremely good! (soon to be divorced 😊)
I hate that you feel this way and I'm very sorry ☹️ take care of yourself ❤️ you matter and you can find happiness even if you don't have it right now!
47 single female here, homeowner, car owner, raising three kids.. life is good ❤️
"Get married or else you'll never be happy! ...But also, being married is torture and I hate it."
MAKE IT MAKE SENSE
Straights never make sense, its why I refuse to be friends with more than one.
Just got out of a long term relationship. He wanted to marry me, had said that for over a year. I told him I wanted to wait until I was 25 at least. And the more time went on the more verbally abusive and hurtful he became. Now, I'm single, living with a roommate who is kind to me and who I get along with excellently. This is the best relationship I've ever had. Romance is not the only thing that matters.
And, if he is also twenty-something, you two are baby adults. This is not true for everyone, of course, but I recommend everyone waiting until they are at least in their late twenties and have dated for at least 3 to 5 years before signing that contract. In the end, it is indeed a contract and the older and more stabilized (financially and career) you are in life before you sign it, the better.
“marriage isn’t hard, it’s impossible!” makes me roll my eyes so hard. i married my best friend and it’s been fairly easy. yes there are fights, there are hard days, but we just COMMUNICATE! we don’t have kids (just a cat, she is our baby!) so we travel, we love spontaneity, and do what we want childfree.
why do conservatives marry people they hate?! 😭
They don't view women as people. That's literally it. Their religion views women as inferior beings so that's not really surprising. What's surprising is how many women follow religions that outright hate them. I will never understand how women can defend christianity, judaism and islam.
If there was a religion that discrimated against men the way the abrahamitic religions discriminate against women, that religion would be declared illegal within days.
Everybody hates them. And they hate everyone. So it's not really a choice.
I suspect that many conservatives marry people they hate because they rush the marriage with the first person they're attracted to, because that's what's expected in deeply religious groups (who see non-married lust as evil). And so, they don't spend time trying to find someone they're compatible with.
Exactly. My husband and I would never call our marriage hard. We are each other's best friends and marriage is incredibly easy. If your marriage is hard you are doing something wrong. We have never ever thought of marriage as being difficult or a challenge. We would never call marriage work.
He's so mad that these women are single and happy, and then will go, "I hate my b*tch wife, am I right fellow men?? 🤣" like yeah I'm good.
46:25 he is actively teaching his daughters that true love is the guy that says "i can't live without you". The thing that every abusive partner says to their victim. He's setting them up for it
Oof, so true.
With so much hatred and contempt for women, he is obviously an abuser himself - emotionally and spiritually if not more. Reminds me of Stephen Crowder's abusive tirade against his heavily pregnant wife.
@mdlmomma9167 well, the downfall of Mars Hill Church was because Mark Driscoll is an outright bully and abuser. He is truly christlike in his character which is evident in this sermon...ie he constantly dog whistles, demeans an6s strawmans those who don't agree with him and despises women.
He wants to dehumanise women by demanding they submit and obey irrational men like him who are controlled by their emotions and hormones and constantly undermining women's credibility when it comes to our own view of our own happiness and life.
He is a liar who projects his dishonesty onto women to justify his dehumanisation and disrespect of women.
This religion is literally grooming
Men have always set their daughters up for failure. The society ensures it is a totally one sided energy exchange where women give all their labour, happiness, time and energy for men and their happiness, not just her family but the males in society generally. Notice how parents encourage their sons for all good things and encourage girls to do all bad things, for eg, a boy will be taught to fight, be brave, face difficulties and a girl will be taught exactly the opposite, never fight, always be polite, don’t be aggressive and always look nice. See how all these things never benefit the individual girl herself but everyone else around her and society will always have men around her all the time because that’s what this whole civilisation is made up of.
2 of my daughters are almost 40 and single. They live extremely rich lives and are very happy. I'm happy for them. People who say they are defective are sick.
I work in a male dominated industry and I don't know a single married guy who is truly happy. That's all they do is complain and are miserable
I remember this one republican guy saying, that it took him about 30 years to realize, that his wife has a personality. These men just have problems accepting, that women are also humans...
This reminds me of my MIL. I asked my husband what hobbies she had when we first started to date (trying to get a feel for future presents and stuff) and he could not answer it. I asked his dad (FIL) and he could really only say stuff that they did together that HE liked doing (hiking, going to the movie, etc). I looked at the both of them and actually started to cry because of the realization that this poor woman is completely unknown in her own home. 2 men that should have pretty much known everything about her (her husband and her son) couldn't even come up with ONE hobby that she likes that didn't involve any of them. My husband a few weeks later started to go to therapy afterwards since he felt so guilty by that fact and wanted to do better.
@@carolbaker2773 I wonder, did she even have hobbies and such or was she so locked in, that the concept was foreign to her? It is like an old board game commercial saying: Fun for the whole family did the commercial promote. The picture showed husband and son playing the game and wife and daughter washing dishes. (it was a 2 player game after all)
The marriages of my mother were/are not that different and I sometimes have the feeling, with her Ex- and her new husband.
The bible is pretty clear on the role of women, and having a personality isn’t mentioned. Mostly serve and obey, and stay pregnant.
@@canadiangemstones7636 Had its reason why the church did not like women in important roles :)
@@carolbaker2773damn. Powerful story and it’s great that your husband recognized how wrong that is.
I suspect these men can only imagine themselves being miserable without acquiring a wife to be their cook, cleaner, brood mare, nurse, sex partner, seamstress, personal assistant, home decorator and travel agent as WELL as someone to split bills with, and just cannot IMAGINE a woman not looking at a man thinking 'oh boy i cant wait to enter servitude to a dude'.
Which is really damn weird considering how often they slag off those same wives, then loose their damn minds when she goes 'urg, fine, have it your way' and files for divorce.
This is all ultimately about control, and a woman who has her own money, no kids, and no man and no faith is almost completely out of their direct control.
“This is all ultimately about control.” Ding ding ding!
Amen!
You've just summed up every relationship I've ever been in quite nicely. Do all the traditional woman's work, and also pay the bills. (They don't want to split bills either, I'm supposed to take care of everything.)
@@bonafidehomicide5742 You’re saying that every romantic relationship you’ve had with a woman, you’ve shared a home with her and you performed all the housework, cooking, and home decorating in addition to paying all of the bills. Is that what you’re saying?
@@alexwyatt2911 I'm the woman. And yes. I'm the breadwinner, and also expected to be the subservient homemaker as well. Constantly. It seems like I just get completely screwed over when it comes to equal partnership. I hate my life.
He's preaching politics, not religion. Yank his tax exempt status, because that's not a church.
Exactly. I don’t recall Jesus saying, “Women, thou shalt marry or you have hath a horrible life. Even though I’m God, clearly I can’t use single women.” 🤷♀️
It's Christianity. The Bible is a regressive document.
Day-um!!! Going there!! I will SO vote to end that farce.
So, I'm forced to subsidize their right to restrict my freedoms and scream about how awful I am? And they think that will last forever (or at least until the Rapture) because Jeezus? Bite me, fools, you're going down.
wild bc i'd rather be single than have someone publicly claim being married to me as their "greatest challenge"
Why are so many men threatened by us? Jealousy… they no that we are happier
Man his take is so inconsiderate of people who would like to be married but for whatever reason haven’t found their person yet. It broke my spirit to be rejected by the young men in the churches I frequented in part bc of the pressure I felt to make this marriage thing happen.
These days I’m a 29 year old single witch with two cats and I’m thriving 😂
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾rock on!
Hey, I also wanna be a witch😢
Teach me a spell!!
I’m a single, early 30-something year old single woman who has the best time with my dog. One thing these old folgies don’t bother to see and understand is that atleast with animals, they actually treat you with love, compassion and are loyal to you. They also 99.9% of the time relieves your stress too. And if you have an animal that has a protective nature, they also bring you security as well. Something most men these days don’t do for women.
This is purely anecdotal, but I spent my teenage years looking for someone who would love me, then went to college, did an international student exchange, and told myself I was *not* going to fall in love, I was going to be doing everything in my power not to - because I was expecting that I'd never get to see that person again and I would only break my heart...
I've been married for 5 years to the guy I fell in love with during that exchange. I've come to believe it's easier to find a person you can really connect with when you're not actively trying, because you're not wearing any masks or trying to impress and you're being more authentically you.
The heart does really weird and sometimes stupid things (the long-distance relationship wasn't easy in the beginning and we've had a lot of culture clashes) and in the end you have to live life the way you see fit. I wish you the best of luck with your cats.
There's a more recent study that shows single women without children are actually the happiest in society 😅
Certainly the happiest heterosexual women.
Saying "Pastor Mark says Hi" during intimate moments would be excellent birth control
Well THAT thought must be purged. Like now. Thanks for pushing me back into trauma therapy.
"single women destroy america" sign me up
64. Female. Never married. No kids. One cat. Never wanted to be married. Great networks of friends. Happy as can be.
They hate single women that doesn't prioritizes marriage, AND YET they act like their wives stole their happiness in life and being passive aggressive about being married and their wives 🤣🤣🤣🤣.... Like they really wondering why women choose to be single and not married when they act like that🤣🤣🤣
46:26 I **despise** that he told his daughters to marry someone who can't live without them, not someone they can't live without like he told the boys. It completely undermines the importance of their own desires (and perhaps safety, let's be real here), and truly demonstrates he actually believes a man's desires are the most important factor. Disgusting and terrifying.
I was looking for this comment… not to mention he makes it seem like his daughters should think that a boy having an obsession towards them is a positive thing and NOT a red flag
Men do not understand love. They confuse benefits with love. If you ask them why they love her, they will list the benefits she provides. Never have I heard objective things about her personality that a guy likes, like she is unique or super smart or funny. Objective qualities of a woman are never even registered, that’s the leading cause of female depression, never getting witnessed for your qualities in a society of enemies who only prey on you. And women usually do not talk about it either because all they will do is use this information to manipulate someone innocent and trap them for personal benefits. Women are individuals with only enemies all around, so they are basically completely alone in this world.
Wow, i didn't even catch that bit within the whole awfulness. Wow. Yeah. “sit here and wait until a man decides you're the one“...... YIKES. I hope his daughters can find their way out of his toxic cult.
And it's like the man is her responsibility to take care off. He can't live without her.
Not everyone should have children.
Also, as a single 29 year old. Happy to be part of the downfall of society 😂
Yeah this is Depopulation without any shots fired.
As a married 31-year-old who is never having children, right there with you.
27 and loving it haha!
😂😂
The world is overpopulated anyway
As a child, my mom left me and my stepmom abused me. My dad was kind, but he allowed the abuse. By age 13 I decided never to marry or have kids. I became a successful artist and writer, and I dont regret my decision to stay unmarried. In fact I am very happy. People like this pastor dont seem to realise that people have different life circumstances that influence how they live, we are not all cookie cutter nor should we be. Thx guys, you did a great video ❤
Cats are wonderful. I’d take a few cats over someone like him!😂
Never understood why cats are seen as a bad thing to guys like this.
@@LattePunch It's because cats are female-coded and dogs are male-coded (and I'm only half-joking). Cats aren't submissive the way dogs are, which pisses off guys like Mork who want everything in their life (especially women and animals) to be subservient to him.
@@ToruKun1It's weird, i can remember a time when cats were the favored pets of online trolls.
@@ToruKun1 cats are evil creatures who will scratch you even though you feed them and take care of them in every regard
Tbh my cats are amazing. More comforting and in tune with my emotions than my ex husband.
Yes! Relationships with our pets are super important and can be very fulfilling!
When he said with 7 cats, those are LIFE GOALS! :D
Except when they jump on you when you need to sleep or makes noise with the blinds at night
Or having two cats fight on top of you when you’re trying to sleep.
@@timothygibney159 or scratch the hell out of you
Ever since I was a child, I dreamed of being beautiful and living alone as an adult. At 33, this is still my priority.
@@lorrainesmith.4995 she didn't say she was celibate. Single does not mean you're not having sex.
Funny how the same people who panic about the 50 % divorce rate are the same ones who insist that marriage will inherently bring every person happiness that they could never know as a single person. Imagine preaching a 100% satisfaction rate for a product that 50% of customers returned lmao
Yeah and those are just the people who get divorced, let's not forget to factor in all the people who remain in unhappy and truly toxic marriages, of which there are a lot. I consider those failures as well. So it's probably more like 75%. Yikes.
For 40 years, my parents were "co-rulers". My mom was, and still is, a Christian but didn't push her beliefs on us children, and my dad was a die hard atheist. Then, about 4 years ago, my dad "found Jesus" and started believing in God, and their marriage took such a drastical turn. Suddenly, my mom had to agree with everything my dad said and any decision he made for them and the family. If she disagreed or went against him, he would get livid and bully her into submission. He started controlling every aspect of her life, what she did,, when and where she went out, what she ate... And when I pointed it out, I became enemy number one and soon was disowned from the family. I liked him better as an atheist.
He's right.
If you marry young, put in your time as a homemaker, accommodate a husband's particularities as his helpmeet, you will still end up alone at 50, HOWEVER, your cats will eat better because of the alimony.
Until I meet someone who will NOT make my life harder, I will happily be single. This pastor literally just wants us all to be as miserable as him. He literally started out stating how his wife was his #1 opp....YIKES! IS he happy? Not convinced, bud. Yeesh!!!
As a 59 year old single mom, I’m happier than I was when I lived with my man baby ex. I’m good, thanks pastor. I have my friends and my B.O.B. when I feel frisky.
😅I had to look up BOB. Leslie Jones once said “No one can get a woman off better than herself”. We have good imaginations so step up, men.
Mmm tension relief! You go girl! You will likely do much better without a second grown child to take care of… Also a 59 yo single gal although my daughter is out of the house and doing the dual income no kids thing with her partner. Cheers!
Exactly sis! I'm always perplexed by the "single childless woman will be old, cold, and alone!" trope. Like, do none of the folks making this assertion account for choosen family, extended family, brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces, ther communities these woman choose to be a part of? Oh no? Because rhey didn't pop out little carbon copies like they did they became so paralyzed by their own depression and loneliness they couldn't bare to leave the house! Biiiitch, please. 😂
Sixty two here......love the saying......B O B is great....never complains....always ready when I am.....and no worries of STD's 😉
Single life is wonderful 😌
Battery operated... boner? Bang...device? Buzz...thing...
I'm a single woman in my late 30s I often get told how miserable I am and how good I could have had it if I had married. I'm often accused of promiscuity, STIs and abortions.
One of the most ironic comments was that I'd have a house now if I married.
No, I'd have a house now if I bought one instead of using my resources to get my brother, his wife, and their two kids into a home instead.
I'm actually happier with being single as I get older. I agree that much of the unhappiness being single is due to cultural expectations and pressure.
He must think the Hand Maidens Tale is a guide to life
Whenever I hear sermons like this, it makes me feel better about being single. I am a single dude in his mid-30's and I am happy with my life. If I end up finding someone in the future then awesome and I will pursue it but if I don't then I know I will be okay.
I felt the same until I found my soulmate
I think when he says miserable, he means men like him are miserable when women are independent. 😂😂😂😂
They don't want to have to think about their relationships at ALL. They are mad that their purpose and privileges as men are not guaranteed any more.
If I'm thinking of the same tiktok, the "childless" woman said she didn't have kids "yet". Never said she never intended to or tried to convince anyone else not to. It was just a young woman stating the benefits of being young and without kids. The horror
To them once a girl starts having her period, she's basically just a baby factory.
That reminds me of a meme I saw once with a picture of a mom, dad and kids that said something like, 'They can't have this, so they want to make sure you can't have it either "
Now, I'm a single guy with no kids. I sometimes think I'd like to be married with kids, other times not. Either way, I would never want to take that away from anyone else, and I was horrified that anyone would think that about me for being single and childless.
I think I like the term "child free" more than "child less"
Because the second one implies that something is missing, that there is a lack of something, and that's not true!
We are so much more than what we don't have/don't want
That's the whole problem with public discourse atm. You say you love pancakes then someone comments, so you hate waffles? Dude that's not the same thing at all!
46 divorced single woman with 2 kids. Only miserable/horrible part of my life? The ex husband. I don’t have to deal with family antics or drama, I sleep in peace (PRICELESS), and can develop the friendships I desire…when I desire them. I don’t have to babysit any man or hand hold their emotional immaturity…. I know a lot of my married friends at this stage of life are struggling with being married. Not necessarily their mate - but institution of marriage. hmmm who is happier?
"It teaches women to be independent, not in love."
Didn´t know they were opposites.
I am a 65 yr old single male. I have never been married nor do I have (or want) kids. I knew from a young age that I was not a "kid person" and was never keen on getting married. I have a great life! I have a good income, have traveled the world, live in a nice house and have a female friend who I am in a "friend with benefits" relationship. Life is good. And no, Mr Driscoll, I am not "lazy" nor "immature". I am living my life on MY terms.
My mother was married and still worked late. Not everybody has scummy pastor wife money. And she is also still deeply unhappy due to her marriage. At one point we were discussing my life choices, of staying in my parents' house instead of being in debt for 30 years for a 45 sqm apartment like the rest of the country, of remaining single, of not wanting children, of having investments, of not taking any shit from employers and knowing my rights. And she said in a small voice that if she could go back in time, she'd do the same. When anyone comments that any one of my cousins who are almost 30 yo isn't married, she always says "good".
50 years old, atheist, child-free, single woman here. I work the hours I choose at a job that is fulfilling to me. If I work late, it is because I am really excited about what I am doing. No cats. Never had an STD. Not lonely living alone. In fact, I feel a bit crowded after someone stays with me for a few days. At Christmas, I visit with friends and family. It is a FAR more enjoyable and less stressful holiday than when I was married.
I'm pretty much the same at 45. I want a cat, though.
Plus, he acts like you would be incapable of finding anyone at age 50 if you did want a partner. He frames this like you have to find someone in your twenties or you are done. He's a fool.
@@AbstractpossomThat's a bunch of bunk. Nearly all of my wife's friends were divorced and in their 40s. But now all of them are partnered up. One is married again and another is engaged. There are plenty of good people out there at every age.
@@Abstractpossom That's bunk. My wife's primary friends group are all in their 40s to early 50s. Just how it worked out, most are divorced. But every single one of them has found a significant other, a couple are now remarried, and one engaged. Why? Because good and interesting people find other good and interesting people. It ain't that complicated. There are plenty of great men and women out there looking for other great men and women.
All the data I've seen says single women without kids are happier. And they have updated info after years. Older women without kids or a husband have less life regrets than married mothers.
Guy's got that Jerry Falwell Jr. meets Larry the Cable Guy drip
Excellent analogy!! 😂
Damn edl6398, you just won the internet for the entire month of November.
This makes me want to punch my head through a wall.
Been married for 10 years. Never experienced anything that Mark is talking about. The fact that so many people are listening to him like he is preaching the best truths of life makes me so sad. It’s going to cause so much damage to these peoples lives😢
I agree. I’ve never been married and I never plan to be, but nothing Mark said has been true for any of the married couples I’ve known/been around. Not my parents, not my parent’s parents, not any of my friends or their families… I think Mark speaks from purely his own experience, and it sounds like a miserable life he’s living.
Same! 12 years and I'd actually say it's pretty easy. We have so much fun together. I would never want to marry if I had what this guy is talking about.
14 years here, and same. My husband and I get mistaken for newlyweds because we’re friendly together. It shouldn’t be so incredible.
This is why birth rates are declining. Young men keep attending these rallies
He has to frame marriage as “the hardest thing you could ever do,” because that means only tough strong men like himself can achieve it.
Funniest shit. I am absolutely everything this guy hates. Atheist, vegan, feminist, anti-racist, anti-capitalist etc. He'd call me a "beta cuck" or worse. And yet I'm in a wonderful marriage with a woman I love deeply and a wonderful daughter that will never have so little self esteem that she would even think about dating a creep like that guy.
And it's so easy and effortless. My secret? My wife's my partner, not my servant.
also to convince wives that putting up with abuse is just part of it and their duty as women.
If your marriage is hard you are doing it wrong
@@m3ntyb that too
100% yes. Only the godliest men can endure marriage, obviously. (Weird.. almost like getting married as young as possible because you’re saving sex for marriage and can’t hold out any longer makes for a bad match..)
I'm single because I saw what marriage meant for my mother, grandmothers and aunts. Being lonely is far more tolerable.
It’s wild how they’ll complain about single women, but will turn around and start complaining about how their wife exists.
I enjoy ya'lls commentary, also you guys give me a little hope by showing me that there are men who treat women as their equal. It's quite lovely seeing you guys taking, he takes you seriously, lets you talk, actually listens and thinks about what you're saying, and lots of eye contact and genuine interest in what you're saying. I know it's the bare minimum but I literally never see this and have never experienced this with any man I've ever interacted with, which is extremely depressing especially since I have a dad and two brothers, I'm used to being talked over, ignored, and disbelieved by men.
Also seeing how you guys lovingly look at each other even after 10 years? Adorable.
Whether a person is lonely living without a permanent partner is completely dependent upon their personality. You can be forever single, religious or not, male or female, reach 50, and feel completely isolated or completely free. Its not this guy's place to tell anyone else how they are going to feel.
Honestly, 7 cats sounds like less hassle than a conservative husband. I'd open a shelter for the critters, they're cute and they don't give you any problems
Wasn't there a study that showed that single women were happier and had a better quality of life than women married to men? And it was reversed for men married to women (they had it better than single men).
That definitely makes sense looking at the bigger picture too, and I'm not convinced the results would have been drastically different if they had taken gay couples into account tbh, I feel like we really overestimate the value of being in a romantic relationship. For some people it's the best decision of their life, for others, they're just not made for it. Or maybe what's right for them is either being single or being in a relationship but not living together/committing to a lesser degree (and thus, still having freedom and being your own person). There's a lot of pressure to be (or at least seek to be) in a relationship (and then have kids ideally) so it's difficult to see whether it's something we actually desire or just something we think we have to do.
Those convervative men complain about their wives all the time, but I doubt they would be able to even eat correctly without them. Their wives would probably be fine though. The reason they push for marriage and try to give the impression that they're doing women a favor - and that it's women who desire marriage, not men - is a clever manipulation. Those men are the ones who need marriage, but they try to reverse psychology the whole thing (and, unfortunately, they're still winning for now, though they did lose a bit of power) to be sure women will say yes despite sometimes knowing on some level it'll make them miserable.
Yeah, that study definitely does exist, I’ve seen it.
Another thing to consider is the methodology of the study. I wonder if the people they surveyed had their spouses there with them; there are definitely some people who would say they are more happy married if their spouse was looking over their shoulder or present at the time. Not saying that’s the case, but it’s something that can have an effect.
@@VWHybridAbsolutely true, though it'd be a fatally flawed study if the questions were asked with the spouse present. That's not to say that people haven't screwed up studies....
@@martinmckee5333 Indeed. When I took Statistics and Psychology classes in Uni they went over a ton of examples where it looked like the numbers from a study obviously said one thing, and then they revealed what the conditions of the study were and it changed the results completely.
It was a good way to open your eyes to the blind spots in statistics and not take for granted that the studies were done under good circumstances for accurate results.
It’s really easy to get the results that back up your viewpoint if you don’t mind using less than ideal circumstances for unbiased answers. Who you survey, where you survey, and how you survey makes all the difference.
@@VWHybrid oh definitely, regardless of the study, looking at its methodology is crucial. It's not always easy to access though. I hadn't even thought about the survey being answered with the spouses present, I assumed the issue - if there is one - would maybe come from a non-representative sample.
Yeah, and let's not forget that the study he invoked still implies that more married women are unhappy than are happy. 40% of married women reporting happiness means that there's 60% who reported unhappiness.
I feel Driscoll would be absolutely flabbergasted by you guys. A healthy, happy relationship between a non believing, progressive couple and no children? They must be secretly miserable and depressed. I had a pastor like Driscoll, and that was always his excuse.
It amazes me how the people who seem to be unhappily married are the ones telling everyone else to get married.
Everyone's different. Some people want to get married, others enjoy being single. Some people want kids, others don't. Not everyone has to take the exact same path in life.
He's making some very valid points here! As a women myself, just look at history. Look at all the wars we've caused and the endless suffering and destruction we have brought! Oh, wait.......
Now that's a read.... 📖😗
I do NOT appreciate the tone you're bringing to this! 😅
I can honestly say that my marriage feels as easy as breathing - why would you get married to someone you constantly fight with?! If your marriage is the hardest thing you've ever done, maybe you're married to the wrong person?
Exactly, my husband is the one person who helps me find my calm spot.
I love it when someone who has only known one woman his entire life but thinks he’s experienced enough to give advice to everyone on women and relationships. Dude, you’re an expert in your specific woman and your specific relationship. If that’s what you want I’m super happy for you. Just stop pretending you are some expert in women.
I doubt he's an expert in his specific woman either
Clearly he doesn't even know what his OWN wife wants. He is unhappy in his marriage, and wants to project that onto everyone else so they share the same woes. Misery loves company.
But in his eyes, we're all one big hive mind, doncha kmow.
The only experts in women are WOMEN. (and even then, one woman doesn't know what's best for all other women).
Exactly 😂
"this is the hardest thing you'll ever learn" idk man, calculus is kinda kicking my butt
Everything I ever heard from Christian pastors is how hard marriage is. Literally no one told us we would be happily married but they all wanted us to get married