My 67-year-old mother grew up with an alcoholic father and a mother who openly favored my mom's brother over her. Her "funny stories" from childhood are always horrifying. A few choice examples: - How she had her "first birthday party" after she got married because her mom had only ever thrown birthday parties for her brother, never for her - The time her brother had to call the police on her dad, who was walking down the street with an axe in broad daylight intending to kill one of his bar buddies - The time her mom MADE my 17-year-old mom dye her hair because her natural color was "ugly" Yes, my mom still insists she had a great childhood. No, she will not go to therapy.
That's really interesting because my Mom is 68 and she openly acknowledges how terrible her childhood was. Her father was an alcoholic and emotionally and verbally abusive. By the time she was ten she was begging her Mom to leave him. They eventually divorced but that was when my Mom was 18 and in her last year of high school.Edit: Then he died of multiple brain aneurysms induced by his alcoholism like a couple years later. He was only in his fifties. Two of his brothers died the exact same way. And when he was in the hospital he told my uncle to tell my grandmother "He won".
Lots of people are in denial for a long time. I used to tell the "funny" stories from my childhood that ended in me being grabbed around the neck for daring to be allergic to fish, to my mom locking me in a closet with the vaccuum cleaner going every day as a baby when I cried (I'm autistic and sensitive to sound and she knew what autism was like because my older brother had it, and did that to me anyway). It took a long time to realize that the reason my health issues got addressed months after they started (broken bone not addressed until my meniscus snapped and I couldn't walk suddenly, not the only example) was because I knew nobody cared or would believe me due to them always ignoring my complaints of other issues like "awful headache and seeing static" (migraines, which I inherited from mom so she surely knew what was happening). I'm glad I know now that those things were unacceptable but from time to time I'll still think back on something and realize that it's yet another thing that changes how I view my childhood. I would've said I was very lucky and happy if you had asked a few years ago, but now I'm not so sure how to characterize it.
Its toxic positivity turned inward. Admitting that things were bad is too much so it all becomes funny anecdotes and "well it could have been worse" etc
Long after my grandma passed, my mom off-handedly mentioned "that's when she had her lobotomy" in a story about her and I was blindsided by it cuz I had never heard anything about that. I just thought some old people had that kind of bad memory.
Yeah, lobotomies didn’t stop as a practice until 1967, and they were disproportionately done to women, so it’s entirely likely that a significant amount of grandmothers of modern day adults either did undergo that or knew someone who did. It was used for an alarming amount of general mental health issues and fixed none of them (because duh)
@@GoingtoHecq There are survivors of lobotomies who are still alive such as Howard Dully, best-selling author of _My Lobotomy._ I know you didn't mean it this way, but what you said can be very dehumanizing to victims of lobotomies.
my friend (18) tells me about how he had his first sexual experience when he was 7, with an adult woman. he tells me that's normal for him (he's a nymphomaniac now)
And if you are really daring, you will say “good, tell them like it is a joke you’d laugh at” and dash right out of there before they snap at you for seriously suggesting you go to therapy.
I basically had this experience after a family funeral. The children of my great uncle were telling fun memories they had with their dad, and suddenly I'm getting bombarded with stories of abuse. The worst part is that they were genuinely laughing; they seriously had re-framed all of their traumatic memories as funny stories. And that would be commendable if I thought they were ever going to address the trauma.
Yep, my dad talks about his life like that. Plus, my parents always talked about how crazy they were and were gonna kill each other as a joke, when my mom legit tried to attack my dad with a weapon multiple times. It's crazy the stories you can tell yourself.
@@kellidinit3725its reframing- its opting into a life of denial and self abandonment. It is a survival mechanism in childhood- not outside of it however which is why adults are being recommended to address their mental health- at large- because we both know how common this is. The pandemic of self abandonment is not new however
@kellidinit3725 Agreed. My fiance was the first person to not laugh with me, then calmly say, "that's not funny. That's bad." Best bit of advice I've ever gotten, besides "the only person in life that has you, is you".
Reminds me about how my mom was laughing about how her dad would just go into random fits of rage to the point that she was so scared she slept with a knife under her pillow and one time he thought she skipped school and was trying to break down her door and she had to barricade it and hide in the corner with her knife until my grandma came home. Was laughing and called it a funny story and everything.
"minded our business back then"? Aren't this the same people who said that today generation is doom because we are too individualist and only care about our tiny little box (phone)? 😂 They sure like to cherrypick
The things that are now OK, but were not then: People are losing their morals! Things that were OK then but not now: People used to mind their own business!
My dad told me about when his parents were missionaries in southern Mexico and how he had 5 dogs that all died of rabies and he bragged about how his dad made him shoot three of them himself and the other two perished the slow way. I was like “DAD THAT IS TRAUMATIC FOR A KID YOUNGER THAN FIFTEEN!!!” He was flabbergasted.
@@ASingleSpaghetti So you get to decide what is normal? Rich countries are so disconnected from the realities of life that they call everything trauma.
@@nichan008 I mean, it's a subjective experience, so no, I'm not walking around in a sultan's hat declaring to people what they should judge as normal behavior. Why are you so defensive?
@@nichan008disconnected from the realities of life??? Dude, he had 5 dogs and personally shot 3 of them, as a child, and then watched the other two die slowly and painfully of rabies. Yeah that’ll be pretty damn traumatic regardless of which country you were born in
One of the very few "funny" stories I remember my mom telling me when I was very little: Her sister and her were fucking around in the cow field spraying milk at each other. This meant less milk when her dad went to milk them. Because of this her father took a belt and proceeded to beat his children with it until they were bloody. She tells this story with uproarious laughter and always ends the story with "and we deserved it too!" My mom absolutely continued the cycle of abuse. Though I never got any belt action, I got everything from her trying to throw me out of a moving car, to mocking my every word, whipping ash trays at me, to abandoning me in Canadian winters on the street when I was 15 over my depression and PTSD. And p much more. We are currently no contact. She really didn't like the time I responded with "no, you didn't." The cycle of abuse is real and it's these attitudes of levity that make it so real.
So can I. Do you think it was parenting or train safety standards that changed? My parents were fucking terrified by the idea of me being near train tracks, but I've also heard stories from older people about loose cables that were whipping around in the wind and severed body parts.
@@snackcakesmcgee7729 I don't know about those cables but I used to hang out around train tracks a lot. I'd for sure have died in childhood if I grew up in the mid 20th century.
@@snackcakesmcgee7729Neither actually, although it's related to the 2nd. the government started spending millions on information related to safety on tracks. produced tons of videos, seminars, infomercial, and school assemblies about how to stay safe near train tracks.
Yeah I once found out about an dead uncle because one of my grand uncles got sad drunk at a dinner because we were moving my Great Grandmother out of his house because he is an alcoholic. probably the weirdest way to learn that my mother actually had 4 siblings instead of 3. I learned a lot of things on that little adventure actually, mostly from him crying into his beer around me.
Remembering that most boomers were raised by Great Depression and WWII era survivors who likely saw the most inhumane and unthinkable things during their formative years and young adulthood makes all of the generational trauma that they passed down more understandable.
Yeah, my grandfather makes a lot of really awful racist jokes about Europeans that really offend a lot of people. But he was a survivor of the Blitz as a child, and his youngest sister wasn't. He was also a dark man growing up in 1940s-1960s UK and his father was very literally kidnapped at the age of 15 from his homeland for WW1 efforts and he later disappeared altogether after he traded the queen in for uncle sam to go fight nazis. No records exist of what happened to him, nobody knocked on the door to tell my English great grandmother that the father of her kids was dead or mia or awol. He just stopped existing mid war. Never leave a man behind, unless he has more melanin than you I guess. You can imagine a teenage absentee kidnapping victim wasn't the greatest at dadding and if you shake some war torn trauma sprinkles on that, you've got a really hardened human with a lot of hate to give. Im not saying the things he days about Germans and YT people in general, is ok, but i am saying I'm not going to be the person to correct him.
Understandable, but not justified. There were also many people who vowed to never let their kids go through what they had to endure, and were brought up in healthy environments.
My grandmother has this "funny" story about trying to sell my abusive granddad's gun for money to run away with the kids, and putting the ad in the papers for his antique handgun in the nightstand. While eating breakfast at the table with very nervous wife and kids, Grandad shoots up while holding the newspaper, exclaiming that someone is selling the EXACT SAME antique gun he has in his nightstand, and if he buys this one, then he could start a collection! He makes plans to call the seller and get the antique gun after work. As soon as he leaves, she grabs the gun and decides to sell it to a pawn shop, and uses that money to run away.
Oh, that's actually pretty clever! Was that the plan all along (to trick him into leaving, then sell the gun and book it), or did she just see an opportunity and take it?
My uncle Jimmy told me a funny story about having to drive his father home cuz he was too drunk to drive, right? How old was he? Oh... about 11? 12? Somethin' like that? So anyway, anyway, he's underage-drivin his dead-drunk dad and guess what? He gets pulled over by the cops. Uh oh. Here's little Jimmy, looking every bit his age (again, 12ish), barely able to reach the pedals or see over the wheel, right? And there's his dad, slumped over in the passenger seat, whiskey *on the dashboard*, I kid you not. And the cop comes up, looks in the car and.... "Oh! Hey, Sergeant [Last Name]! Eyyy, this your kid? Drivin ya dad home, huh? Whadda guy. Alright, get outta here youse two. Seeya at the precinct tomorrow, pal." Jimmy became a cop, too :) NONE OF WHAT I JUST POSTED WAS FABRICATED I AM NOT SHITTING YOU. Anyway this was a very good and very authentic skit, well done on it.
From the stories my father told me about his days growing up on a horse farm outside of Birmingham told me, This just would have been considered responsible behavior, Cop or not 🙃
Hey VoidBurger! I was super horrified when I read this then saw it was you. I'm a fan. Lol. Your story reminds me so much of the stuff my 71-year old grandma talks about, but oddly, she's not in denial about how horrible it was.
Flashback to the mother's day dinner with my mom, grandma, and sister when my grandma just. Entirely out of the blue. Mentions that my (deceased, alcoholic) grandfather once held a knife to her throat while holding her over the sink to catch the blood. She'd married him when she was 19 and had her first kid with him a few months later (she was pregnant during the wedding). My mom quickly changed the subject while my sister and I were struggling to process that. Terrifying insight into both of their lives.
Once we were looking through old family photos and my grandma goes “Doesn’t he look just like Theodore?” Who apparently is my 2nd cousin who lives in Europe and makes contemporary music??? And I had never heard of before???
In my 20s, I found out that my Great Aunt & Uncle (the ones with the famed "room full of antique dolls") lived in a decrepit mansion that was supposedly haunted with "lion statues at the gates." I had family who lived in a haunted fucking mansion and somehow no one dropped this lore for over 2 decades.
I'm trans, and when I came out, my family told me I apparently have an aunt who came out as trans before I was born, and was ostracized. They won't even tell me how to contact her 😢
My dad tends to have these moments. The last time it happened, he told a story about an old church friend whose daughter was born without eyes, causing him to renounce God and basically disappear from the face of the earth. It really disturbed me.
My grandma had a pretty good home life that she tells a lot of stories about, but one thing she did say was, “I don’t understand why we have all these special programs for kids who don’t speak English. I spent kindergarten and first grade in the back of the classroom because I didn’t speak English,” (she’s from Maine, but her parents were from Quebec and she only spoke French at home) “and eventually I just figured it out on my own.” She just brushed me off when I was like, “Okay, but you’re literally in Mensa. Most kids are going to need at least a little bit of help.”
Really inventive dad she had. Ziplines and shake weights cost a fortune, yet here he is getting the same things from little things just lying around the house.
That's what REALLY happened to the disappeared uncle, but the parents made up the story about the train tracks to hide the shame from the neighborhood. The older kids know, and the younger kids just never questioned such an obviously outlandish story as to why he was the only one to not get a good catholic funeral.
@@jakirakumahata5701reminds me of how my grandpa had to lie his ass off to the priest about his dad getting into a “boating accident” because he was a good man who totally not on the verge of bankrupting the family with his gambling problem
The people who raised boomers were so full of and averse to acknowledging trauma. My grandpa had all these hilarious stories from when he was a POW. At 10, I learned not ask “What happened next?” because the answer was invariably “Oh, the Nazi guards beat him to death.” 😳
I have spent a lot of time in 12 step support groups for people from dysfunctional families and have had so many arguments with boomers (not to mention my own dysfunctional family) - I know this woman. This is incredible.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t laugh at this. The lady played the part perfectly, mind, this isn’t a dig at her. All those fun little family memories just made my stomach cramp up something awful… 😬 Perfect delivery, lady. Hat off to you.
My dad letting it slip that signing up to go to VIETNAM was preferable to living at home with his father. Like no joke he signed up at 17 and did two tours. Also found out my grandfather SA'd my aunt when she was a teen and that's why she decided to leave home and get married at 16.
Not to make light of the situation, but that is also what happened with the character Slade Wilson, otherwise known as Deathstroke. Reminds me of the life imitating art expression.
@@AliseMorales I don't know what it says about me that I could identify a youtuber by their laugh, but I'm so happy he was there to support you then! Your performance was amazing I was laughing the whole time!
Reminds me of when my dad talked about how his parents (aka my grandparents) yelled vile things at him when they got mad like "go die!", and my dad explained it as "it was normal at the time."
my parents aren't boomers but are older gen X, they're a bit more down to reality on what actually WAS bad and not funny but they still drop lore like this that has me like... are you okay??? My dad's side had the mystery disappearing brother and his dad tried to kill him a few times I think, and my mom had a mean "nickname" and her family has a "super funny" story of the family dog accidentally being killed...
@@hereatmeiko Trains are just dangerous and kids think they're cool. My dad said he had an uncle who lost his arm that way trying to flatten pennies. My dad still was always telling us kids how cool flattening pennies on the track is. People just straight up used to never watch their kids. Even as a millennial, I was rarely supervised as a kid.
Yeah my great uncle recounted a story about his brother after he died where their dad started kicking him while he was on the ground and when their mom yelled at him to stop because he was hurting his son he replied, “There can be no pain where there is no brain.” At least he didn’t frame it as funny, but when my great aunt (his wife) said, “that’s horrible!” He just kind of shrugged. Then immediately followed it up with the time the kids at their high school grabbed his brother, stripped him, painted his balls in the school colors, and threw him on the lawn under the windows for everyone to laugh at. I don’t remember what the response was for that one but there was definitely a shocked silence for a bit. And they wondered why their brother was off.
Parent: “Lol, so one time your dad’s grandpa pressed his hands to a hot grill when he got bad grades” Us: “Who the fuck starts a conversation like that, we just sat down!”
I never got many about my boomer dad's parents (besides my grandmother got a bit mean when she was wine drunk) but I remember sitting at my uncle's dining room with my dad, his brothers, and a couple of their buddies from high school. They would drink and laugh and tell stories about high school as I sat there listening to them recount them being bullies in high school. After 2 or 3 stolis, I got out of the house and found the nearest gay bar to hide out at till my family passed out.
"Hahaha, my parents used to make me go pick out the stick they would whip me with. And if it wasn't good enough, they'd pick a bigger one." - my father
My uncles and aunts have that same exact story. Always framed as not that big of a deal, or even a sort of bragging rite (but like a 'i guess i survived something bad' kind of bragging), yet the understanding that it was messed up seems to be there under the surface when they mention it.
When their humor is “we expected this particularly bad thing from our father but today this equally bad thing but even more dadaistic thing from our father happened today! Whoo! Such subversion, very funny!”
My grandmother was an abusive alcoholic. When I was younger she would sometimes tell me stories about her dad. She said he was a "fun drunk" as if that was somehow different from an alcoholic, which he clearly was. Most of her stories were harmless, like how he would be happy and dance with her when he would drink. Just stories about an intoxicated man bumbling about. But one day she told me about the time they had company over and he tried to go greet them in nothing but his underwear. She was about 14 and she tried to stop him, so he punched her hard in the stomach. Hard enough to double her over. And she laughed about it, even when she said she thought that punch had caused some of her "female problems" later on. When I said he shouldn't have hit her she said that it was her fault for trying to stop him. That story made her more human to me. She was still a terrible person and she shouldn't have done the things she did, but I understood her better.
Abuse begets abuse. There is a reason it's a cycle. Likely the "fun drunk" grandfather has a sordid tale of his own. I wish society would take it more seriously. We all wonder why there are so many crappy people in the world, it's because it's not easy to get out of those cycles and there are still common behaviours and justifications for terrible things that happened or are happening. Regardless, I hope you're doing well and that your gen was the tail end or stop of that cycle.
Not told to me as a funny story, but one day my grandmother is talking about her father and she goes "well, as an adult I understand why he was so strict with us and probably not the best husband (understatement), I mean hus cousin killed his dad when he was just a baby," And she completely glossed over that as if that isn't the most crazy bullshit to suddenly reveal to someone in casual conversation. I tried to get the focus back on that and she simply replied "it was common back then, why's that so important?" Idk ma, you never told me there was a hamlet reenactment in our family history!
This is really uncanny. I'm not going to like describe anything in detail but this comic captured the general sentiment of my Mother's childhood. Ultimately after my Grandfather gave up drinking my Mother reconnected with him. It's hard to explain unless you've been in a position like this but you grow up hearing these awful stories and then see this person actually change for the better.
Ugh same. The blank stares from co-workers when I realize not everyone has meth problems in their home town 😅 good luck on your journey! Therapy is 100% worth it. If your first therapist isn't compatible, don't worry, try another!
I grew up hearing stories from my mom about how her brothers charged her to play chess with them and abandoned her at a train station on the way home from school. (She was 6 or 7)
When my dad casually dropped how he had a 29yo girlfriend when he was 21 and she was kinda crazy and when he broke up with her she tried to break into his house in the middle of the night
My mom insists some of the stories of her abusive alcoholic father are funny, and I finally had to sit her down and explain that while I know she's desperate to cling to any positive memories of her late father, she needs to be mindful of how harrowing these stories actually are. No she won't go to a professional therapist. Just church counselors 😒
One time my mom said her cousins pushed her out of a canoe and then trapped her under the water between the boat and the dock. She nearly drowned and her parents didn't care AT ALL. She told me that's when she learned that assholes cover up their crimes by calling them pranks and never to fall for that shit
I think a lot about how, if this wasn't picked up as abusive behaviour back in the day, what are we doing now that'll be considered abusive in several decades time that's considered normal? Scares me to think about. I'm just glad people realise now what's not normal.
Sad but true. My alcoholic parents when they were alive used to yell at me for having a glass of wine with dinner at the same time they were drinking out of full on 1.5L bottles in front of me.
Not my parents, but my grandparents…I don’t want to say anything directly because I feel weird talking about people’s pasts (at least while they’re still alive), but during the last story I heard from my grandma, me and my sibling just kept glancing at each other, in shock, looking for reassurance that yes, we did hear that, and we are not the crazy ones here.
my grandma sat across the table from me when i was eating once when i was like... ten? and told me about how her grandma tried to kill her with a metal pan when she was little. anyways that experience definitely changed me for the worse
My grandmother was the boomber, she told stories like this. My aunt tells stories like this, she's a gen x. My mother doesn't tell stories. She's no longer alive. Now... I tell these stories... mostly when people push me to say something in public when I know I have nothing to offer. I fucking hate it. This is why I got out of the genepool. I'm not passing this crap on
Audio tech here. I mean, yeah you could. You don’t really need to though if you’re recording a small comedy club. Room mics work just as well. Yeah there’s reverb, but audio quality isn’t really the priority hers
It's nice to hear the audience laughing, not like the character's kids, who are probably complaining about ‘abuse’ and ‘domestic violence’ and all that woke nonsense they talk about these days.
I had to stop and think for a moment too, because this was the lowest comment and those are usually the ones with this kind of rhetoric, except it's used unironically. I think TH-cam has an invisible rating system that takes dislikes into account.
@@EmeraldLavigne Yeah, you’re right! I was blessed with parents that were too stubborn to get divorced so they just yelled all the time, a mom who treated me as an equal so I was responsible for her feelings, the recession causing massive depression in all members of my family and leaving us without income for 2 whole years, family in the psych ward for mental health, losing my grandparents super early in life to debilitating diseases like Alzheimer’s when I didn’t yet have the emotional competence to process it, and we all got along great! Sorry to be sarcastic 😂 Just you don’t know someone’s life experience from one comment lol
Wow, reading these comments is so sad. I would never tell anyone about my past if I believed they would believe I was so broken by my experiences I had no idea of how traumatized I was!
Sorry to say, this is rendered unwatchable by the deafening “laughter” that continues throughout. Maybe it’s my iPad speaker but I can’t even tell what she’s saying for most of it.
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My 67-year-old mother grew up with an alcoholic father and a mother who openly favored my mom's brother over her. Her "funny stories" from childhood are always horrifying. A few choice examples:
- How she had her "first birthday party" after she got married because her mom had only ever thrown birthday parties for her brother, never for her
- The time her brother had to call the police on her dad, who was walking down the street with an axe in broad daylight intending to kill one of his bar buddies
- The time her mom MADE my 17-year-old mom dye her hair because her natural color was "ugly"
Yes, my mom still insists she had a great childhood. No, she will not go to therapy.
That's really interesting because my Mom is 68 and she openly acknowledges how terrible her childhood was. Her father was an alcoholic and emotionally and verbally abusive. By the time she was ten she was begging her Mom to leave him. They eventually divorced but that was when my Mom was 18 and in her last year of high school.Edit: Then he died of multiple brain aneurysms induced by his alcoholism like a couple years later. He was only in his fifties. Two of his brothers died the exact same way. And when he was in the hospital he told my uncle to tell my grandmother "He won".
Lots of people are in denial for a long time. I used to tell the "funny" stories from my childhood that ended in me being grabbed around the neck for daring to be allergic to fish, to my mom locking me in a closet with the vaccuum cleaner going every day as a baby when I cried (I'm autistic and sensitive to sound and she knew what autism was like because my older brother had it, and did that to me anyway). It took a long time to realize that the reason my health issues got addressed months after they started (broken bone not addressed until my meniscus snapped and I couldn't walk suddenly, not the only example) was because I knew nobody cared or would believe me due to them always ignoring my complaints of other issues like "awful headache and seeing static" (migraines, which I inherited from mom so she surely knew what was happening). I'm glad I know now that those things were unacceptable but from time to time I'll still think back on something and realize that it's yet another thing that changes how I view my childhood. I would've said I was very lucky and happy if you had asked a few years ago, but now I'm not so sure how to characterize it.
Its toxic positivity turned inward. Admitting that things were bad is too much so it all becomes funny anecdotes and "well it could have been worse" etc
@@Maximusdecismusmeridus explain
@@kinseylise8595 if it helps I think you’re mother is a wh0re
Long after my grandma passed, my mom off-handedly mentioned "that's when she had her lobotomy" in a story about her and I was blindsided by it cuz I had never heard anything about that. I just thought some old people had that kind of bad memory.
Yeah, lobotomies didn’t stop as a practice until 1967, and they were disproportionately done to women, so it’s entirely likely that a significant amount of grandmothers of modern day adults either did undergo that or knew someone who did. It was used for an alarming amount of general mental health issues and fixed none of them (because duh)
Sadly, you never actually knew her. She was killed a long time ago.
@@GoingtoHecq There are survivors of lobotomies who are still alive such as Howard Dully, best-selling author of _My Lobotomy._ I know you didn't mean it this way, but what you said can be very dehumanizing to victims of lobotomies.
And the kids just sitting there thinking "... Ah so this is why our entire family is Like That"
Oh yeah. Reminds me of when my dad started a "funny story" with "Okay, so this is technically almost molestation..."
I am simultaneously intrigued, yet uncomfortable
@@alpha_9997same 😂
😨😨😨
my friend (18) tells me about how he had his first sexual experience when he was 7, with an adult woman. he tells me that's normal for him (he's a nymphomaniac now)
I really need to hear this story but I desperately don’t want to
you will gently suggest unpacking their trauma in therapy and they'll laugh like it's a funny joke
And if you are really daring, you will say “good, tell them like it is a joke you’d laugh at” and dash right out of there before they snap at you for seriously suggesting you go to therapy.
I basically had this experience after a family funeral. The children of my great uncle were telling fun memories they had with their dad, and suddenly I'm getting bombarded with stories of abuse. The worst part is that they were genuinely laughing; they seriously had re-framed all of their traumatic memories as funny stories. And that would be commendable if I thought they were ever going to address the trauma.
It is not reframing. It is a survival mechanism.
Yep, my dad talks about his life like that. Plus, my parents always talked about how crazy they were and were gonna kill each other as a joke, when my mom legit tried to attack my dad with a weapon multiple times. It's crazy the stories you can tell yourself.
@@kellidinit3725its reframing- its opting into a life of denial and self abandonment. It is a survival mechanism in childhood- not outside of it however which is why adults are being recommended to address their mental health- at large- because we both know how common this is. The pandemic of self abandonment is not new however
@@kellidinit3725 Reframing IS a survival mechanism. It's not a good survival mechanism, but a survival mechanism nonetheless.
@kellidinit3725 Agreed. My fiance was the first person to not laugh with me, then calmly say, "that's not funny. That's bad."
Best bit of advice I've ever gotten, besides "the only person in life that has you, is you".
The enormous glass of wine is really the most accurate, perfect detail to add to all of this
Reminds me about how my mom was laughing about how her dad would just go into random fits of rage to the point that she was so scared she slept with a knife under her pillow and one time he thought she skipped school and was trying to break down her door and she had to barricade it and hide in the corner with her knife until my grandma came home. Was laughing and called it a funny story and everything.
That’s absolutely terrifying, holy shit.
"But they don't say anything because we minded our business back then,"
And yet they never can seem to mind their own business NOW, can they?
Makes sense that there were so many serial killers back then.
@@obara7366 I think that's more because we catch em before they become "serial" now.
"minded our business back then"? Aren't this the same people who said that today generation is doom because we are too individualist and only care about our tiny little box (phone)? 😂 They sure like to cherrypick
The things that are now OK, but were not then: People are losing their morals!
Things that were OK then but not now: People used to mind their own business!
My dad told me about when his parents were missionaries in southern Mexico and how he had 5 dogs that all died of rabies and he bragged about how his dad made him shoot three of them himself and the other two perished the slow way.
I was like “DAD THAT IS TRAUMATIC FOR A KID YOUNGER THAN FIFTEEN!!!”
He was flabbergasted.
Why do you get to decide what's traumatic for someone else?
@@nichan008When the thing the other person is describing would realistically traumatize a healthy functioning human
@@ASingleSpaghetti So you get to decide what is normal? Rich countries are so disconnected from the realities of life that they call everything trauma.
@@nichan008 I mean, it's a subjective experience, so no, I'm not walking around in a sultan's hat declaring to people what they should judge as normal behavior. Why are you so defensive?
@@nichan008disconnected from the realities of life??? Dude, he had 5 dogs and personally shot 3 of them, as a child, and then watched the other two die slowly and painfully of rabies. Yeah that’ll be pretty damn traumatic regardless of which country you were born in
One of the very few "funny" stories I remember my mom telling me when I was very little: Her sister and her were fucking around in the cow field spraying milk at each other. This meant less milk when her dad went to milk them. Because of this her father took a belt and proceeded to beat his children with it until they were bloody. She tells this story with uproarious laughter and always ends the story with "and we deserved it too!"
My mom absolutely continued the cycle of abuse. Though I never got any belt action, I got everything from her trying to throw me out of a moving car, to mocking my every word, whipping ash trays at me, to abandoning me in Canadian winters on the street when I was 15 over my depression and PTSD. And p much more. We are currently no contact. She really didn't like the time I responded with "no, you didn't."
The cycle of abuse is real and it's these attitudes of levity that make it so real.
I'm sorry she put you through that. Hope you're doing better now 🫂
Soooo I had an uncle Bill who died by the train tracks and I can confirm that part is 100% accurate with eerie specificity.
So can I. Do you think it was parenting or train safety standards that changed? My parents were fucking terrified by the idea of me being near train tracks, but I've also heard stories from older people about loose cables that were whipping around in the wind and severed body parts.
@@snackcakesmcgee7729 I don't know about those cables but I used to hang out around train tracks a lot. I'd for sure have died in childhood if I grew up in the mid 20th century.
@@snackcakesmcgee7729Neither actually, although it's related to the 2nd. the government started spending millions on information related to safety on tracks. produced tons of videos, seminars, infomercial, and school assemblies about how to stay safe near train tracks.
Ya, he's who we're talking about
oh god the "I didn't tell you about Uncle tommy" in the past tense is so real. Granted his death fucked up my dads family irreparably so go figure lol
lmao yeah when i was younger there were so many uncles mentioned in stories that i had never been told about before 😂
Yeah I once found out about an dead uncle because one of my grand uncles got sad drunk at a dinner because we were moving my Great Grandmother out of his house because he is an alcoholic. probably the weirdest way to learn that my mother actually had 4 siblings instead of 3.
I learned a lot of things on that little adventure actually, mostly from him crying into his beer around me.
I've seen my dad tear up recounting some things while an uncle would laugh about the same thing, and the laughter makes it extra uncomfortable.
Remembering that most boomers were raised by Great Depression and WWII era survivors who likely saw the most inhumane and unthinkable things during their formative years and young adulthood makes all of the generational trauma that they passed down more understandable.
Yeah, my grandfather makes a lot of really awful racist jokes about Europeans that really offend a lot of people.
But he was a survivor of the Blitz as a child, and his youngest sister wasn't. He was also a dark man growing up in 1940s-1960s UK and his father was very literally kidnapped at the age of 15 from his homeland for WW1 efforts and he later disappeared altogether after he traded the queen in for uncle sam to go fight nazis. No records exist of what happened to him, nobody knocked on the door to tell my English great grandmother that the father of her kids was dead or mia or awol. He just stopped existing mid war. Never leave a man behind, unless he has more melanin than you I guess.
You can imagine a teenage absentee kidnapping victim wasn't the greatest at dadding and if you shake some war torn trauma sprinkles on that, you've got a really hardened human with a lot of hate to give.
Im not saying the things he days about Germans and YT people in general, is ok, but i am saying I'm not going to be the person to correct him.
Understandable, but not justified. There were also many people who vowed to never let their kids go through what they had to endure, and were brought up in healthy environments.
My grandmother has this "funny" story about trying to sell my abusive granddad's gun for money to run away with the kids, and putting the ad in the papers for his antique handgun in the nightstand. While eating breakfast at the table with very nervous wife and kids, Grandad shoots up while holding the newspaper, exclaiming that someone is selling the EXACT SAME antique gun he has in his nightstand, and if he buys this one, then he could start a collection!
He makes plans to call the seller and get the antique gun after work. As soon as he leaves, she grabs the gun and decides to sell it to a pawn shop, and uses that money to run away.
Okay, but that is kind of funny though. Dark context, but still funny.
Oh, that's actually pretty clever! Was that the plan all along (to trick him into leaving, then sell the gun and book it), or did she just see an opportunity and take it?
My uncle Jimmy told me a funny story about having to drive his father home cuz he was too drunk to drive, right?
How old was he? Oh... about 11? 12? Somethin' like that?
So anyway, anyway, he's underage-drivin his dead-drunk dad and guess what? He gets pulled over by the cops. Uh oh.
Here's little Jimmy, looking every bit his age (again, 12ish), barely able to reach the pedals or see over the wheel, right? And there's his dad, slumped over in the passenger seat, whiskey *on the dashboard*, I kid you not. And the cop comes up, looks in the car and....
"Oh! Hey, Sergeant [Last Name]! Eyyy, this your kid? Drivin ya dad home, huh? Whadda guy. Alright, get outta here youse two. Seeya at the precinct tomorrow, pal."
Jimmy became a cop, too :) NONE OF WHAT I JUST POSTED WAS FABRICATED I AM NOT SHITTING YOU. Anyway this was a very good and very authentic skit, well done on it.
*insert 1000 yard stare meme*
Laws don't exist if they don't apply to the police...
From the stories my father told me about his days growing up on a horse farm outside of Birmingham told me, This just would have been considered responsible behavior, Cop or not 🙃
Hey VoidBurger! I was super horrified when I read this then saw it was you. I'm a fan. Lol. Your story reminds me so much of the stuff my 71-year old grandma talks about, but oddly, she's not in denial about how horrible it was.
Did he like become a cop because he actually did show up at the precinct the next day? When he was still 11-12?
Flashback to the mother's day dinner with my mom, grandma, and sister when my grandma just. Entirely out of the blue. Mentions that my (deceased, alcoholic) grandfather once held a knife to her throat while holding her over the sink to catch the blood. She'd married him when she was 19 and had her first kid with him a few months later (she was pregnant during the wedding).
My mom quickly changed the subject while my sister and I were struggling to process that. Terrifying insight into both of their lives.
WHAT
Once we were looking through old family photos and my grandma goes “Doesn’t he look just like Theodore?” Who apparently is my 2nd cousin who lives in Europe and makes contemporary music??? And I had never heard of before???
In my 20s, I found out that my Great Aunt & Uncle (the ones with the famed "room full of antique dolls") lived in a decrepit mansion that was supposedly haunted with "lion statues at the gates." I had family who lived in a haunted fucking mansion and somehow no one dropped this lore for over 2 decades.
I'm trans, and when I came out, my family told me I apparently have an aunt who came out as trans before I was born, and was ostracized. They won't even tell me how to contact her 😢
@@celisewillis i dont mean to pry but how are things now? were you able to contact her? :c hope all goes well for you
See, my dad just keeps this all inside and just traumatizes us without context.
Same here! And then let’s it all out at once when you’re wholly unprepared
My dad tends to have these moments. The last time it happened, he told a story about an old church friend whose daughter was born without eyes, causing him to renounce God and basically disappear from the face of the earth. It really disturbed me.
My grandma had a pretty good home life that she tells a lot of stories about, but one thing she did say was, “I don’t understand why we have all these special programs for kids who don’t speak English. I spent kindergarten and first grade in the back of the classroom because I didn’t speak English,” (she’s from Maine, but her parents were from Quebec and she only spoke French at home) “and eventually I just figured it out on my own.” She just brushed me off when I was like, “Okay, but you’re literally in Mensa. Most kids are going to need at least a little bit of help.”
Really inventive dad she had.
Ziplines and shake weights cost a fortune, yet here he is getting the same things from little things just lying around the house.
Back then they knew how to do a lot with a little, y'know. Your generation doesn't have that.
@@keithklassen5320yeah, its because we are addicted to screens and oat milk 😥
@@GhostKingDeAngelo Don't forget inventing things like "depression" "alcoholism" and "allergies"
Realistically the uncle would’ve ended up committing -something unsuitable for TH-cam- but “no, mental illness doesn’t run in our family”
That's what REALLY happened to the disappeared uncle, but the parents made up the story about the train tracks to hide the shame from the neighborhood. The older kids know, and the younger kids just never questioned such an obviously outlandish story as to why he was the only one to not get a good catholic funeral.
He was playing on the tracks...the game was "lie down and see how long it takes for a train to come by"
@@jakirakumahata5701reminds me of how my grandpa had to lie his ass off to the priest about his dad getting into a “boating accident” because he was a good man who totally not on the verge of bankrupting the family with his gambling problem
The people who raised boomers were so full of and averse to acknowledging trauma. My grandpa had all these hilarious stories from when he was a POW. At 10, I learned not ask “What happened next?” because the answer was invariably “Oh, the Nazi guards beat him to death.” 😳
I have spent a lot of time in 12 step support groups for people from dysfunctional families and have had so many arguments with boomers (not to mention my own dysfunctional family) - I know this woman.
This is incredible.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t laugh at this. The lady played the part perfectly, mind, this isn’t a dig at her. All those fun little family memories just made my stomach cramp up something awful… 😬
Perfect delivery, lady. Hat off to you.
The size of that wine glass, though!
It's okay, she has a job!
My dad letting it slip that signing up to go to VIETNAM was preferable to living at home with his father. Like no joke he signed up at 17 and did two tours. Also found out my grandfather SA'd my aunt when she was a teen and that's why she decided to leave home and get married at 16.
Not to make light of the situation, but that is also what happened with the character Slade Wilson, otherwise known as Deathstroke. Reminds me of the life imitating art expression.
my dad's "funny" story is about his dad making him hold hot lightbulbs as punishment.. like uhhhh okay
I think I might just watch too much Drawfee but I swear to god I heard Nathan Drawfee's laugh in the audience at 2:50
omfg that's so him
@@zander...k.7968 thank god I’m not the only one who hears it
I thought the EXACT same thing!
it is him!!!!! we’re old pals 🥰
@@AliseMorales I don't know what it says about me that I could identify a youtuber by their laugh, but I'm so happy he was there to support you then! Your performance was amazing I was laughing the whole time!
Reminds me of when my dad talked about how his parents (aka my grandparents) yelled vile things at him when they got mad like "go die!", and my dad explained it as "it was normal at the time."
They always say "that's just how it was back then" girl no, that's how OUR FAMILY WAS. Ofc we think it's "normal" when it's all we know.
Telling someone to "go die" is mean but tbh I would accept a basic but genuine apology for it
my parents aren't boomers but are older gen X, they're a bit more down to reality on what actually WAS bad and not funny but they still drop lore like this that has me like... are you okay??? My dad's side had the mystery disappearing brother and his dad tried to kill him a few times I think, and my mom had a mean "nickname" and her family has a "super funny" story of the family dog accidentally being killed...
Oh thank God, I’m not alone
I can imagine the amount of work it took to get this monologue so sharp. Well written, well delivered! Way to go ❤
Lots of kids “died” by the train tracks back then, dear, no we dont think about it 🍷
I feel like I'm missing an implication?
@@Sky-bx9mn The hint was that the accidents may have instead been su*cides, I think.
@@hereatmeiko Trains are just dangerous and kids think they're cool. My dad said he had an uncle who lost his arm that way trying to flatten pennies. My dad still was always telling us kids how cool flattening pennies on the track is. People just straight up used to never watch their kids. Even as a millennial, I was rarely supervised as a kid.
Man found swimming in denial
Yeah my great uncle recounted a story about his brother after he died where their dad started kicking him while he was on the ground and when their mom yelled at him to stop because he was hurting his son he replied, “There can be no pain where there is no brain.”
At least he didn’t frame it as funny, but when my great aunt (his wife) said, “that’s horrible!” He just kind of shrugged.
Then immediately followed it up with the time the kids at their high school grabbed his brother, stripped him, painted his balls in the school colors, and threw him on the lawn under the windows for everyone to laugh at.
I don’t remember what the response was for that one but there was definitely a shocked silence for a bit. And they wondered why their brother was off.
Jesus
That's demonic.. I wonder what happened to boomers to make them soo, evil..
"what, i thought you said that word was coming back!" actually made me check the upload date, ngl
Parent: “Lol, so one time your dad’s grandpa pressed his hands to a hot grill when he got bad grades”
Us: “Who the fuck starts a conversation like that, we just sat down!”
I never got many about my boomer dad's parents (besides my grandmother got a bit mean when she was wine drunk) but I remember sitting at my uncle's dining room with my dad, his brothers, and a couple of their buddies from high school. They would drink and laugh and tell stories about high school as I sat there listening to them recount them being bullies in high school.
After 2 or 3 stolis, I got out of the house and found the nearest gay bar to hide out at till my family passed out.
I'm sorry you went through that..❤❤
I love my mom, but this was a bit too real
"Hahaha, my parents used to make me go pick out the stick they would whip me with. And if it wasn't good enough, they'd pick a bigger one." - my father
My uncles and aunts have that same exact story. Always framed as not that big of a deal, or even a sort of bragging rite (but like a 'i guess i survived something bad' kind of bragging), yet the understanding that it was messed up seems to be there under the surface when they mention it.
The fishbowl full of wine really sells it
An entire generation confusing laughter of relief for humor
When their humor is “we expected this particularly bad thing from our father but today this equally bad thing but even more dadaistic thing from our father happened today! Whoo! Such subversion, very funny!”
My grandmother was an abusive alcoholic. When I was younger she would sometimes tell me stories about her dad. She said he was a "fun drunk" as if that was somehow different from an alcoholic, which he clearly was. Most of her stories were harmless, like how he would be happy and dance with her when he would drink. Just stories about an intoxicated man bumbling about. But one day she told me about the time they had company over and he tried to go greet them in nothing but his underwear. She was about 14 and she tried to stop him, so he punched her hard in the stomach. Hard enough to double her over. And she laughed about it, even when she said she thought that punch had caused some of her "female problems" later on. When I said he shouldn't have hit her she said that it was her fault for trying to stop him.
That story made her more human to me. She was still a terrible person and she shouldn't have done the things she did, but I understood her better.
Understanding the behavior doesn't mean you're justifying it, of course. Hope the generational trauma has quieted down for you ❤
Abuse begets abuse. There is a reason it's a cycle. Likely the "fun drunk" grandfather has a sordid tale of his own. I wish society would take it more seriously. We all wonder why there are so many crappy people in the world, it's because it's not easy to get out of those cycles and there are still common behaviours and justifications for terrible things that happened or are happening.
Regardless, I hope you're doing well and that your gen was the tail end or stop of that cycle.
Not told to me as a funny story, but one day my grandmother is talking about her father and she goes "well, as an adult I understand why he was so strict with us and probably not the best husband (understatement), I mean hus cousin killed his dad when he was just a baby," And she completely glossed over that as if that isn't the most crazy bullshit to suddenly reveal to someone in casual conversation. I tried to get the focus back on that and she simply replied "it was common back then, why's that so important?" Idk ma, you never told me there was a hamlet reenactment in our family history!
Patricide was most certainly NOT common "back then" 🤦 Boomers, yet again, projecting family trauma to the entire human species
If i have ever been certain about anything its that the laugh at 2:45 sounds exactly like nathan yaffe of drawfee fame
HOW DID YOU CATCH THAT HELP 😭
HOW YOU'RE SPOT ON
A different comment pointed this out-she responded and apparently they’re friends and it actually is him!!!
Nah I hear it too
This is really uncanny. I'm not going to like describe anything in detail but this comic captured the general sentiment of my Mother's childhood. Ultimately after my Grandfather gave up drinking my Mother reconnected with him. It's hard to explain unless you've been in a position like this but you grow up hearing these awful stories and then see this person actually change for the better.
98% of all the actors I've seen here are soooo talented with amazing writing abilities!! Tnx TH-cam!❤
We think so too! (And we’re sorry about Graham and Woody)
@@CharactersWelcome 😂
Honestly though!
It took me way too long to get the “90s...or was it 09?” joke.
i don’t get it?
@@jacoolzi Dyslexia. She’s accidentally switching the 0 and the 9, but she’s oblivious to the possibility of her being dyslexic, too.
One of my friends told me to stop telling her “funny” stories from my childhood because they’re all traumatising.
I think I need to go to therapy. 😅
That sounds like a great idea, I wish you the best of luck!
Ugh same. The blank stares from co-workers when I realize not everyone has meth problems in their home town 😅 good luck on your journey! Therapy is 100% worth it. If your first therapist isn't compatible, don't worry, try another!
This shouldn't be so true for an entire generation, but it really, really, really is.
I grew up hearing stories from my mom about how her brothers charged her to play chess with them and abandoned her at a train station on the way home from school. (She was 6 or 7)
The countless digressions are what sells this.
When my dad casually dropped how he had a 29yo girlfriend when he was 21 and she was kinda crazy and when he broke up with her she tried to break into his house in the middle of the night
Why is the train track thing so true? My husband’s uncle was run over by a freight train (he lived! but don’t worry, he overdosed on drugs later 🤗)
This is brilliant and terrifying
I had a great uncle Ugly, this felt personal
Real, except in reality the wineglass is more than a prop.
My mom insists some of the stories of her abusive alcoholic father are funny, and I finally had to sit her down and explain that while I know she's desperate to cling to any positive memories of her late father, she needs to be mindful of how harrowing these stories actually are. No she won't go to a professional therapist. Just church counselors 😒
Videos to text to my mom with no context
My mother told me about abuse and assault all the time and then got frustrated because I wasn't laughing. I guess I just have a weird sense of humor.
One time my mom said her cousins pushed her out of a canoe and then trapped her under the water between the boat and the dock. She nearly drowned and her parents didn't care AT ALL. She told me that's when she learned that assholes cover up their crimes by calling them pranks and never to fall for that shit
I have met people in real life just like this character, it got too real hahaha.
😭 The _accuracy!_
god this is so real
My god!😂😂😂 i had this playing in the background but soon had to stop what i was doing to strap in for this.😂😂😂😂
I think a lot about how, if this wasn't picked up as abusive behaviour back in the day, what are we doing now that'll be considered abusive in several decades time that's considered normal? Scares me to think about. I'm just glad people realise now what's not normal.
Omg why is the every story a grown up in my family ever told me
Sad but true. My alcoholic parents when they were alive used to yell at me for having a glass of wine with dinner at the same time they were drinking out of full on 1.5L bottles in front of me.
my dad talking about climbing a crane barefoot while blasted on coke was an interesting middle school experience
2.40 Am I going insane but I swear that is Nathan Drawfees laugh
If you meant 2:50 then I hear it too
I can’t believe they left Nathan in the Characters Welcome audience
lol is this why I was recommended this video? Not complaining though, this is such a good bit
In another comment chain, it was confirmed to be him. He's friends with the woman in the skit!
@@EmeraldAshesAudio Thank you for the closure, I hope the rest of the Drawfee crew comes to pick him up soon
oh this is EXCELLENT
This is absolutely fantastic, thanks Alise! I feel like I have met herrrrrr
Not my parents, but my grandparents…I don’t want to say anything directly because I feel weird talking about people’s pasts (at least while they’re still alive), but during the last story I heard from my grandma, me and my sibling just kept glancing at each other, in shock, looking for reassurance that yes, we did hear that, and we are not the crazy ones here.
Those SHOES! XD
my grandma sat across the table from me when i was eating once when i was like... ten? and told me about how her grandma tried to kill her with a metal pan when she was little. anyways that experience definitely changed me for the worse
Wooooff this is real…
My grandmother was the boomber, she told stories like this. My aunt tells stories like this, she's a gen x. My mother doesn't tell stories. She's no longer alive. Now... I tell these stories... mostly when people push me to say something in public when I know I have nothing to offer. I fucking hate it.
This is why I got out of the genepool. I'm not passing this crap on
"Your uncle seems to get into lots of car accidents Charlie"
"Yeah he loves his cars!- loves his cars"
stop channeling my mom lol
1:58
the "how my friend exploded" story
This is great, but you gotta record audio with a lapel mic. Or at least a directed mic.
Audio tech here. I mean, yeah you could. You don’t really need to though if you’re recording a small comedy club. Room mics work just as well. Yeah there’s reverb, but audio quality isn’t really the priority hers
Hahahaha my trauma makes me funny.
I enjoyed the parts I could hear over the din of the crowd.
Gen X :🚬😮💨 You wouldn't believe the way we kids were treated back then. it's why we're tough.
Boomers:🍷😃 We kids had so much fun back then.
i cant believe no one has mentioned the absolutely FULL wine glass
like half the comments are about the wine glass, can you read
@@cashnelson2306 why do you have to be a dick, man
20/10
It's nice to hear the audience laughing, not like the character's kids, who are probably complaining about ‘abuse’ and ‘domestic violence’ and all that woke nonsense they talk about these days.
You know it's a bad sign when I had to pause for a moment and think because at first I took you seriously.
@@pleasegoawaydude : Thanks for taking the time!
I had to stop and think for a moment too, because this was the lowest comment and those are usually the ones with this kind of rhetoric, except it's used unironically. I think TH-cam has an invisible rating system that takes dislikes into account.
@@18skeltor : It looks like I should have used /s this time.
@@tobybartels8426 Sometimes /s can be interpreted as /sincere OR /sarcasm, so debatable how much it would help
Can we pool some money together to get this stage some sound foam?
This is actively my aunt
I know this is supposed to be funny but I just feel bad for this character
YEAH.
This made me so sad
Y’all would have 20x the subs if you had the stage miced up better.
A perfect exaggeration of this type of person 😂😂😂
"exaggeration"
Look who grew up with a non-dysfunctional family and non-traumatized parents!
@@EmeraldLavigne Yeah, you’re right! I was blessed with parents that were too stubborn to get divorced so they just yelled all the time, a mom who treated me as an equal so I was responsible for her feelings, the recession causing massive depression in all members of my family and leaving us without income for 2 whole years, family in the psych ward for mental health, losing my grandparents super early in life to debilitating diseases like Alzheimer’s when I didn’t yet have the emotional competence to process it, and we all got along great!
Sorry to be sarcastic 😂 Just you don’t know someone’s life experience from one comment lol
oddly sounds kinda #GenX…
Wow, reading these comments is so sad. I would never tell anyone about my past if I believed they would believe I was so broken by my experiences I had no idea of how traumatized I was!
And all these boomers want to make America great again? Gtfoh
Sorry to say, this is rendered unwatchable by the deafening “laughter” that continues throughout. Maybe it’s my iPad speaker but I can’t even tell what she’s saying for most of it.