"You are only responsible for saying how you feel" That's an important one for me. A key person in my life gaslights too. She is also adept at playing dumb when I talk about feelings (lots of other things as well). Then she'll ask for explanations, and afterwards point out the inconsistencies in whatever I say..... A mug's game! More gaslighting, really. I will stick to stating my feelings in future. Thank you!
Hi Alex. I observe a very directive, one-sided approach. Where were YOU in the exchange, Alex? I feel really frustrated that you didn't really ask why was she so upset and explored that, and instead maintained more of a mentoring mode throughout, as someone with authority. Therefore you held the power in this session. Her future looking bleak seemed to be explained away by you, basically saying it was because of the supplements. Did you not explore that with her because that isn't your model? Is this what having a bag of positive psychology 'therapeutic' tools looks like? The imbalance of power also played out in the conversation about her father - whilst you educated her about gaslighting (did you really think a young woman would not know what it is?) you maintained the power and she still had the appearance and sound of a "little girl" (I really hope that was her term you borrowed). Wiping nose with hand was an obvious display she was still without power. The therapeutic relationship should really be the crucible of experiential change, would you agree. I realise I have only a narrow window but I'd be cautious of watching any more of these in case my suspicions are right and I am myself triggered.
Hi Jonny, I'm Oliver - one of the producers of In Therapy. Thanks for getting in touch, and I can appreciate your concern. To give some context, during this iteration of the series, we were cutting hour-long sessions down to roughly 20 minutes to make them more digestible for TH-cam. Therefore, lots of back and forth between Alex and the participants were not included. We have since realised this does not give an accurate reflection of the true therapeutic process and now include almost the entire session. Hopefully the more recent sessions will alleviate some of your concerns listed above. Please continue to provide feedback as it really helps us improve the channel. Thank you.
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Thanks Hannah for sharing your story ❤
11:48 "If he's not able to make the effort to care enough to understand, that tells you something important" 💡big lightbulb for me
"You are only responsible for saying how you feel" That's an important one for me. A key person in my life gaslights too. She is also adept at playing dumb when I talk about feelings (lots of other things as well). Then she'll ask for explanations, and afterwards point out the inconsistencies in whatever I say..... A mug's game! More gaslighting, really. I will stick to stating my feelings in future. Thank you!
Wow, that had so much good teaching in it for me about what healthy communication looks like in a tricky relationship.
Hi Alex. I observe a very directive, one-sided approach. Where were YOU in the exchange, Alex? I feel really frustrated that you didn't really ask why was she so upset and explored that, and instead maintained more of a mentoring mode throughout, as someone with authority. Therefore you held the power in this session. Her future looking bleak seemed to be explained away by you, basically saying it was because of the supplements. Did you not explore that with her because that isn't your model? Is this what having a bag of positive psychology 'therapeutic' tools looks like? The imbalance of power also played out in the conversation about her father - whilst you educated her about gaslighting (did you really think a young woman would not know what it is?) you maintained the power and she still had the appearance and sound of a "little girl" (I really hope that was her term you borrowed). Wiping nose with hand was an obvious display she was still without power. The therapeutic relationship should really be the crucible of experiential change, would you agree. I realise I have only a narrow window but I'd be cautious of watching any more of these in case my suspicions are right and I am myself triggered.
Hi Jonny, I'm Oliver - one of the producers of In Therapy. Thanks for getting in touch, and I can appreciate your concern. To give some context, during this iteration of the series, we were cutting hour-long sessions down to roughly 20 minutes to make them more digestible for TH-cam. Therefore, lots of back and forth between Alex and the participants were not included. We have since realised this does not give an accurate reflection of the true therapeutic process and now include almost the entire session. Hopefully the more recent sessions will alleviate some of your concerns listed above. Please continue to provide feedback as it really helps us improve the channel. Thank you.