What are you supposed to do besides die? Because unless you're not telling us something, we all have Commoner stats. What are we supposed to do against anything higher than level 2?
Mine has refused to do damage from levels 4 through 8 due to his moral code not allowing him to harm most creatures (exceptions include mindless or evil undead, and hostile fiends), so the life-domain cleric kobold would likely just be hunting me down to give me a stern lecture.
Nothing, he has a habit of getting chronically lost unless it's to find a tavern, and since I don't drink I think I'm good! I'm super happy that I tend to think about the penalties my character will take before I think about their positives, and making a character who literally can't ever find anything (as in purposefully rolls disadvantage on all perception, survival, persuasion, and investigation checks) would be an absolute dream in a situation where my last character has to find me. That being said, if he got help finding me, there's no chance of me beating a lvl 20 Polearm Master Battlemaster that was turned pseudo-undead giving him the ability to turn to mist and fly with a 300 ft move speed PLUS a literal 'teleports behind you' attack (my DM hates that I named it 'Nothing Personal Kid'). No my only hope of survival is offer him good alcohol or a great adventure. He's also chaotic good, so I could try appealing to his better nature so long as I wasn't on the actual path of evil. But uh... no. No fighting. Just dead.
HA! I’d be hunted by my oath of the ancients paladin Christoph Greenthorne, a good old farmer boy turn holy crusader that worships the goddess of agriculture. The worst I’d have to deal with him is his talkative nature
A level 11 undead half elf artificer alchnemist level 5, grave domain cleric level 6. Who protects stolen primordial texts of a world ending plague. ( their plague god wants the texts back too, but cannot take away their clerical abilities)
i would wake up, go eat breakfast, and immedatly die because his pet mimic put whyvern poison into my milk. Or some other arcane crafted disease, most likely not a fast one as he likes experimenting. Not saying he's evil, I could offer some knowledge and intregue him.
I've played dungeons and dragons once as an orc, things didn't go too well for me😢. Tho I do have some characters I once thought up so Idk if those count either
Galath Hadron is a 6’8 human barbarian with a 300lb stone slab of a sword that uses lightning magic, and raided with a tribe of orcs for 20 years. He hurled a great axe at a dracolich that was 120ft. in the sky, hit it in the neck and made it fall onto a lava-covered floor. He decapitated a storm giant with one swing, and castrated an ogre with a power slide. Die. I’d fkn die.
I’d be dead. Level 20 character, finished his character arcs so he doesn’t really have much in the way of psychological weaknesses, and he’s the strongest character I’ve ever made. I’m talking 1v1 Tiamat while remaining above half health, being ready to do it again after a short rest. There’s a reason I named him “Chad the God Killer”
I don’t remember the details, but I used Paladin, Bard, and barbarian. I also had a bunch of magic items that I used to increase my AC and CHR. The basic idea was to make my defenses so strong that I wouldn’t take much of any damage. My lowest save bonus was in the teens or twenties ish, any my AC was above 40. I don’t think I used armor, and I had an Epic Boon as well as an additional feat (due to our table’s homebrew rules that I’m pretty sure we had at the time). It’s been a while since I used Chad.
If Tiamat somehow couldn't land a physical attack she'd just dragons breath you every turn and stay out of your melee reach. You'd die no matter how good your resistances are or how high your saves are, because at best you're still taking half damage from breath attacks that do between 67 and 90+ damage per breath attack. Now if you were talking about the Tarrasque, that would be easily doable even from a much lower level.
Get insurance. While Rita is a strong, super-fast literal bunny rabbit of a girl (Mutants and Masterminds, backstory is ‘bunch of scientists tried creating a slave army of human/animal hybrids, but played her in DnD as well, Shifter Monk), she’s also a sweetheart who won’t kill anyone who isn’t a machine or demon. Best case scenario, she’ll ask me to give up. Worst case, I get a few broken bones.
LMAO had a similar experience recently. We were playing a Waterdeep campaign, and ended up going throught the sewers. The DM said that we were going through a passage with about a foot of sewage. My character was 1 foot 5. yeah another party member ended up carrying my sewage drenched hobo of a tabaxi after we realized that
not quite undying, but insanely durable as well: Warforged Battlemaster-Fighter-8/Zealot-Barbarian-4/Artillerist-Artificer-3/War-Wizard-2 with Shield Master feat and a sentient artifact-level adamantine-greatsword he and his creators collaborated in creating.... And yes, he also wears adamantine armor. So bringing him down isn't exactly easy. He was built to survive attrition-warfare, and it shows. Out of the 500 of his kin that went to war, by this point only around 20 are left... ...and he's one of them. And perhaps the most formidable of them.
Warforged paladin, Oath of Conquest. 20 AC at 3rd level... I might survive if i surrender to him though, because he is hardcoded with the rules of engagement.
I hear you... Oh boy do I hear you.... Warforged Battlemaster-Fighter-8/Zealot-Barbarian-4/Artillerist-Artificer-3/War-Wizard-2 with Shield Master feat and a sentient artifact-level adamantine-greatsword he hand his creators collaborated in creating.... The one and only hope for survival is that he is not governed by emotions (although he very much experiences them). So if I can come up with a logical reason why killing me is a bad idea, then all is well. if not, well... at least he's only going to need one hit...
My current Pathfinder character is Darius - an elf with draconic ancestry, neat magic spells, great intimidation, and absolutely no physical coordination. In his first session, he took twenty minutes to scale a short cliff face, killed two snakes nesting in a log, then nearly died falling off said log three separate times. To protect myself from being hunted by this clumsy beauty, I lay a downed tree in front of the door and go to bed without a care in the world.
I guess a heavily religious bird is going to be screaming encourgements at me?? (Owlin Cleric, he was, so, so, ecstatic all the time. And loud.) Edit: I should also mention he had a really bad habit of accidentally assisting the enemy.
Sounds similar to my kobold, a life-domain cleric who, from levels 4 through 8, did not deal even a single point of damage. His moral code heavily restricts what he will cause harm to (mostly mindless/evil undead and fiends.).
There is nothing I could do. He is silent, can be anywhere any time, and can be anything. Kenku Warlock hex blade with Bard College of Swords. Leveled to 28. He took control over the first level of Hell. He commands the army's of Hell. He can cast Disguise Self at will. He had a +25 to slight of hand checks. It was a very broken build. So much fun. But very broken.
I'm lucky that in the last session I played, I introduced my new character of the campaign: An autognome battlesmith artificer who has a big humanoid robot for his steel defender. Frank (the Steel Defender) would probably be a pain to deal with, but Ketloy (the actual artificer) has a pistol. It was either them or a woman with a magical halberd of mercury who has managed to kill at least 10 royal soldiers and the most powerful sorcerer she has heard of (the King) all on her own. Not to mention the fact that if she knows that I was the one who created her backstory, then that would give her a strong explanation for why she'd be hunting me down.
My last character I played would depend on how close to the prompt we stick. The last thing I ran was an NPC old master of a knight’s order well into his 60’s who missed _7 out of 8 attacks_ last combat. He’s not _particularly_ chivalrous but he isn’t a murderer either. Probably just stay in my car and keep moving around 10 mph until the old man’s heart gave out or he changed his mind. The last _PC_ I played was Jenta Tyvrane, an utterly ruthless Drow thief rogue whose unarmed attacks are about as dangerous as a short sword’s (level 3, with Martial Artist dedication). I can’t outrun her (40 foot move speed). I can’t out maneuver her (+4 Dex and good related skills). My only hopes are either to get a gun and wait somewhere with a single entrance, convince her killing me does nothing to advance her master’s goals or protect the world as a whole, or _maybe_ overpower her as she has +0 strength in pathfinder (that’s a fairly big deal). Of course, she’s trained to take on larger, _trained_ opponents, so that last one is just a “YOLO” move. And finally, my last _D&D 5e_ character is Anton Pierrovich, an old Rune Knight, ex-soldier who was flung through time to the campaign’s present time (level 4 Rune Knight). Oddly enough, he’s the most likely to react calmly to suddenly being in the real world, as the leap to 2,000 years before the campaign to present campaign is probably just as shocking as going from the campaign to the real world. I could explain that I don’t _know_ where his son ended up being flung, but I _do_ know he’s alive somewhere, and that every second he spends in my world is a second not spent in his looking for Nimir. Again I could maybe hop on a highway and flee, but unlike the NPC he’s tough, strong, and determined, so that would take a long time. He also uses a glaive and is like 6’4”, so maybe again holding a gun in a narrow, confined space would help.
The last character I made is for a modern-day setting and she is a red Dragonborn tinkerer whose job is to be a courier that drives a sports bike. Highly skilled and maneuverability and an escape artist when being pursued by people. Which in turn means that she is able to hunt down the person she is tasked to do so; in other words I am boned. And it's lucky I'm in covering her and not her ancestor matchstick, who would plot My Demise by either blowing up my apartment complex or using me as an experiment if I pissed her off enough
I'd probably go and buy some cheese and buy a whole pig carcass, then hide He was a pretty chill Astral Self monk who was slowly transforming into a Wendigo, and he had quite the soft spot for cheese
I’m being hunted by the half astral elf half human gravity wizard Terrum, a young wize cracking, college graduate with a PHD in women’s studies, and an occasionally murderous strategist. He would find me with some divination spell, roll a 30 stealth somehow, and stalk me for 2 hours while deliberating about a plan, only to completely go off plan. He would knock me out and I would wake up in a bad of holding while he deliberated for another 2 hours about what to interrogate me on. Only for me to not have any information, and be thrown back into the bad to be forgotten and die of suffocation.
Im being hunted by Vol'Ak a Githyanki who lost their whole squad of fellow gith to a mindflayer on the material plain. This was their first time on the material, so they were a fish out of water and stuck. They became a mercenary, and during one job, they accidentally killed the person they were hired to save. They and their group brutally dealt with the kidnappers to the point the hostage fought us in fear, and we only only knew they were the hostage after death. The hostage was a wizard planning their escape and didn't want to kill the captors, so they were taking their time. Until we came along. We rolled so many nat 20s we turned all those kidnappers to mush. Well, after that day of murder and trauma, Vol'Ak became a Redemption Paladin who desperately just wants to help those in need or who have strayed from the path of good. They arent wise, they find most people to be good, they love their parties buddy who is a lich of thay but my character doesnt know what that means and never has thought to distrust the "kind" wizard. They only dont trust you when you give a really good reason. And our party now babtsits them and sometimes points them towards a thing and says " Its evil go get it" and then Vol"Ak will go and ask "Hey are you evil?" And depending on the response, they either have a new friend or foe. They've made so many evil friends that they're confident are good or are on the path towards good. But if you are evil... they will pull out a hexblade and show you the wrath of love and kindness. They found a cursed sword, and i decided to go 1 level in hecblade and become buddies with my cursed sword. Make it do some good. So I think I'd just have a new friend
Not to be dramatic but I would do anything for Vol'Ak. I love him, he's so sweet and I can totally see him accidentally turning people towards good just because he believes in them so much. My character is this but in the different direction: a highly intelligent though a little sheltered canus (doggo) artificer/bard who would, quite literally, do anything for his friends. Good isn't the moral good - good is what his friends decide is good. He tries his best to also stay on the morally good part, mostly so his friends don't go down a path he knows they would regret, but hey if this dude made our casters life hell it's only fair he gets to learn just how long it takes for a person to die.
My wood-elf werewolf barbarian, Fennis, is now hunting me. The good news is he was also formerly a monk, so he’d likely be willing to negotiate or talk through things rather than solve conflict with violence (his stat rolls were stupid good so I figured I’d put some stats into dex and wis and have his backstory be he was a monk before he got bitten and was exiled from his order).
Garrett, a halfling druid, mounted on a fasteith (a really fast dino from Eberon) named "stich." I'm out ranged and out run. But the impending chase is making it on the internet
I’d sit down and pray that tzeench would find it funny to deny him of a kill. Either that or I’d sit down huddled in a corner attempting to look as pathetic as possible as his code prevents him from claiming skulls he feels would be unworthy for Khorne to sit upon(also know as “he doesn’t kill the weak… usually”) the only exception would be if it was a directive straight from Khorne that a specific individual must die or if the weakling was somehow preventing him from arriving at a proper battle He is a level 20 warforged oath of conquest paladin who worships the blood god Khorne named Baerakus who duel wields lances while riding a huge sized bear, both covered in adamantine full plate. (The bear is an artificer/druid/paladin played by a friend of mine.) 1. He Is himself a large creature(magic item) 2. His mere presence exudes such terror on anyone around him that their minds literally rend themselves apart. 3. His AC is at an almost permanent 32 with adamantine armor which means I quite literally can’t hurt him in any way as his armor has exactly zero weak spots and I am certainly no tarrasque 4. He does not need to eat, drink, or sleep so if he is hunting me down in particular then he has exactly zero reason to stop. 5. He is effectively immortal as a warforged so I’m not outliving him. 6. He has a back up great sword just in case someone gets too close so I wouldn’t be inconveniencing him all that much by closing the distance. 7. His aura while you are frightened by it also prevents you from moving so I’m not going to be able to flee. 8 he has a 14 in wisdom with expertise in perception so I’m not hiding from him(feat: skill expert)
I'm not worried at all, I'd be hunted by my Redemption Paladin. He won't kill me, he's the most morally upstanding character I have ever played lol. If it was any of the previous 3 characters I'd played before the Paladin I'd be dead lol
Man, I’m glad it’s not accurate to real life, the real ones are faster than soldiers, and can do basically anything that they can do WITHOUT armour, besides maybe sink or take it off within the hour.
If we are doing campaign AND oneshot characters, my hunter would be an old mechanic with a love for the craft and assorted teas. There would be no need to fight. He is a peaceful man. If oneshots dont count however... Anchor306 is a warforged eldritch knight specialising in crossbows and all things ranged (sharpshooter feat). Reflavoured as a robot crafted by dwarves, designed for atmosphereless-zero g environments. Anchor wields a coil rifle that fires tungston rods for said exploration. Anchor was my first time powergaming a character (not without rp or personality ofc). My best and only hope would be to short circuit his memory banks as part of his character is that he was offline in the bottom of an ocean for soooooo long that his memory storage just rusted away. It would have to be triggered from intense questioning.... If I even had the time to do that.
My last D&D character was Johnathan S. Duct Tape, an artificer who used duct tape for like 90% of his abilities. This MF also had “Gun Chucks”, a pair of guns that he attached to opposite ends of a chain. He also had: Bagpipes, A 7/11 sign, 2 Coffee machines, a tiger named “Got Cheeto”, and LSD that he got from Loki. I’m most likely screwed.
My rock gnome artificer kinda became the party diplomat/therapist. He had a decanter of endless water and a homebrew item called the gooey gooey chocolate chip cookie ring. He would make me cry, but probably also better. His name is Rothan Whitestone.
Oh I’d be absolutely screwed. Level 18 divination wizard. I’d be found by scrying then either be warped to another dimension, disintegrated or sucked into a black hole. And I’d have no chance of living cause of good ol’ portent. At least she’s somewhat kind, but she does get the job done. The character before that was a lvl 20 zealot barbarian who used a sword the size of a five story building so honestly I’d be red paste if any of the last like five characters of mine jumped me.
Last thing I played was a Thrii-kreen Graviturgy Wizard named Roach Limit. With fire bolt and Phantom Steed, fighting them would be extremely challenging.
Mushu, the level 20 rogue/assassin half-elf, neutral evil. He’s covered head-toe in tattoos of weapons that when touched, produce said weapon from the ether (magically stowed weapons, if you will). He formed one of the largest assassins guild and one of the few that actually employs Naztharune assassins. He was my character from our first and longest running 3.5 campaign. I wouldn’t worry about him hunting me. There’s clearly nothing I can do about it and might as well enjoy whatever time I have left.
Last character was a level 10 Divine Soul Sorcerer named Wilos who only acts normal around her companions. If I’m an enemy I should just accept that I am utterly fucked. She will probably just hit me with one lightning bolt or something and I just end up as a pile of ash. Like I said, fucked.
Yeah I'm dead af, my last character was a level 15 red dragonborn oath of vengeance paladin named Arcturus Belldura (first name after a very large star). He started as oath of conquest serving vecna as a lawful evil warlord and after being betrayed by vecna swore vengeance on him and anyone else that would get in his way, so if he doesn't see me as a threat then I'm good, but if he's hunting me then I'm fucked. He had a Pegasus, haste and all sorts of smites, he has been shot several times (we had a gunslinger) and he wasn't that beat up. He had all sorts of magical items that made him an absolute animal to fight and personally I don't see myself walking away from this alive. Oh and fun fact he did get his vengeance on vecna in the end of our campaign by grappling him, preventing him from talking and made him watch as my buddies Annihilated what was left of his guards after Arcturus tore through them, scary mf
Oh, I am cosmically fucked. There is literally no scenario where I even survive this. For context, in the current campaign I'm playing in, we all are humans transported from a different version of Earth into a magical world, isekai-style. And my character, Kane Bridgemaker, is the fucking CEO of a multi-billion dollar company called "Valiant". He does not care for others, the only exception to this rule being his sister, and has no problem ruthlessly murdering someone, if it furthers his goals. Now that isn't the worst part. The worst part is that he's a bard, and that we rolled our stats. And I rolled a fucking 90. So he has (with other modifiers applied of course) 14 STR, 18 DEX, 15 CON, 14 INT, 14 WIS, and 20 CHA. He ALSO is part of a special bloodline that makes his vicious mockery do d8 dice damage instead of d4. He ALSO has the tough feat, making him have as much HP as our fucking tank, and misty step. This man wouldn't kill me, he'd fucking erase me from history, if not in hand to hand combat, he'd just have to write a single text on his phone and a fucking army of hired guns and hackers would make sure that I'd be forgotten forever. Even if I somehow got my hands on his sister to like blackmail him into leaving me alone, he'd find a fucking way to get around that, even if he doesn't have his company and wealth backing him. Like, wtf do I do against the Sleep Spell?
My last character was a psychopathic murderer who would probably still kill me even though he’s level four at the moment. If we were to fast forward a few more sessions I would be mega screwed because the DM has let us know that we can take it to godhood if we wanted.
As the DM, the last character I voiced was “SLAMBO” the Glabrizu. I’m just gonna off myself instead of waiting for a brick shit house to cause as much chaos as possible on his way to murder me as violently as possible.
Im chillin. My last character was a war-forged bard that was made out of wood and was given the power of the wind to aid in their ability to play music. My new character that I’m currently playing as, is an extremely home-brewed insanely powerful Half-Orc barbarian with an overwhelming constitution modifier of +56, and that’s not even his highest modifier bonus. New guy wins.
Oh I'm screwed. A neutral sorcerer that can move at blinding speeds and his strongest feat being a twinned empowered FiREbAll that was able to obliterate a storm giant. As well as instantly kill an army of 50 orcs, including a vice general and general.
Yeah I'm fucked. He's a reborn warlock on a quest to remake the world in his own image, and get revenge on the greedy. He has a magical scythe with a connection to an ancient greater daemon. And he's also gay. So either I'm fucked because he'll kill me. Or I'm fucked very literally.
A writer and reporter who has been chasing me because she wants to hear my story so bad? I'll just submit, tell her everything and then ask her to let her friend comfort me.
I'd invest in fire extinguishers. V is a draconic bloodline sorcerer with a almost solely fire based spell list and a pretty good incineration track record. Good thing that he is the last character I played though, and not the 20 AC war machine that is my beloved Warforged paladin "Brick", who I played for a little one shot. My only shot for surviving against him would be to surrender because he was hardcoded to follow the rules of engagement.
Mine was a homebrew WW1 campaign he’s a dhampir engineer. He gouged out a man’s eye with a wrench and punched a man’s jaw so hard it nearly fell of and got labeled as a psychopath. Tf do I do
Well I had a aspiring necromancer of a doctor/oracle who isn’t a particularly good fighter, more of a assholeish healer, so if I keep on the run and out of the range of the worst of his spells I should be fine. Good thing too since last campaign ended recently and that guy became a god!
I play a Mimic(The characters don't know but the players and DM know) in Full Armor named Steel Ichornose who talks with paper and pencil and I'm just going to say I'm dead
I've only played DND once, and that wasn't with my own character. However, I do have a character already in mind. He's a Dragonborn Artificer who took the Alchemist route. My idea is he's a Green Dragonborn, giving him a poison breath weapon and poison resistance. He uses it to create his potions and forage for ingredients respectively. I have to deal with a lizard man who can make bombs.
I'd just be fucked, (I play a custom version with less rules and no classes because me and my friends don't know how to play proper DnD) my dude can summon any creature, real, extinct, video game character, TV show character, book character, or other animals and other shit, e.g. ARKS GIGA, Owlman,THE BLOOP and so on. He can also shoot unnaturally strong and thin steel wires that he has complete control over, just like how he has complete control over his summons. He can also open a black void that can pull any weapon from up to modern times. If my friends did this challenge, and our characters teamed up, we'd be fucked even more like one of the characters are a GLITCH IN THE UNIVERSE with mind control, demonic summoning, wall phasing, and teleportation. There is also one who has slain MULTIPLE EARTH DRAGONS and has armor made from those scales with a great sword serrated with the teeth of said dragons, he also has a gilded long bow with nichilin tipped arrows. The next one is a water based dragon born who has forearms that can transform at will between wings, hands, and claws while dual wielding nichirin great swords and being able to use light magic and invisibility spells. One more has the ability to control and enhance plant life while being a sadistic master poison brewer who can brew colourless, odorless, untraceable poison in mere seconds. The final one so far is a duchess who owns 2 swords and 2 throwing axes that can fuse with each other (I mean like the swords can fuse and and same for the axes) and when unfused, the swords can control the elements like from atla minus air and when fused the swords become extremely effective at hurting beings of dark and light while the axes both fused and unfused can control the winds and boomerang back when thrown. Safe to to say, *We. Are. Fucked.*
I'd be dead. Lvl 7 blood rager barbarian wyvarin who dual wields axes. Chaotic neutral ex gang muscle. The only way I would live is if I could pay him more than his employer or if he knew my past and would let me disappear if I had the money for it.
Well, i don’t think anyone could survive being hunted by a level 12 elven rouge. I don’t need to though, since lucky for me, that campaign ended last week! Instead, i have to face a 4ft tall level 2 tabaxi artificer. Still intimidating, as he has a tendency to catapult molotovs, but at least i have a chance, and at least it would be harder for a character who is obviously nonhuman to traverse the world and get to me. I mean, he’s 4 feet tall! I could throw him out a window if he got close enough! All i could really do is prepare. My main plan: use his own tricks against him. Make a healthy amount of molotovs, grab all the weapons i can, and probably make armor out of various kitchen implements. Sure, a cast iron breastplate will be heavy and brittle, but maybe duct tape and prayers will make it hold up.
My last character was a black level 4 dragonborn ranger named Gorija that has a pet baby wyvern and baby ankylosaurus named Rodan and Angirus respectivly. Im just fucked man.
Welp, I'm fucked. I used to be a forever dm. A player wanted to do a ww2 isekai into fantasy world. Im getting chased by a Conquest paladin who thinks he is a actual tool with minimal free will. He was told to be a soldier since the day he was born, and We are only a few sessions in.. He hasn't had his character arc. Im going to get Eather Double smited. Or shot it the head by a holy m1 garand.
Bruce, a human Cleric of Heironeous; basically if gym bros had a religion about being gym bros... I'd probably be fine. But just to be sure, I'd hire my first ever character so he can't do the same; a wood elf Ranger with the Urban Bounty Hunter background.
Kellach, Warforged Barbarian wielding a massive two handed hammer on a revenge quest. He’s not too bright and afraid of heights, so tricking him to a cliff side and stranding him there would be a good start. Lots of ways to make him fall to his death.
I am being hunted by basically Moonknight. Gladin/Vormak = Stephen/Marc. In the campaign they're from, there is a form of fast-travel: basically each major population center has a large Soul Crystal, and every indivivdual has a Soul Stone. When the person wants to fast travel, they activate their Soul Stone, which connects to a Soul Crystal, and transforms their matter into soul energy which travels through the Soul Plane and then is reconstituted at the destination. Some terrorists were screwing with a Soul Crystal just as Galdin and Vormak were coming out of it, causing it to explode. Vormak's body was reconstitued and his soul put into it, but the crystal glitched with Gladin and thought that Vormak's body was his, so both their souls were fused and put into the same body, altering Gladin's memories to match Vormak's. They both died due to the explosion, which is when the moon god made a pact with Vormak to bring him back as a warlock in return for Vormak to serve him. When Gladin woke up, "his" body had magic moon powers so he became a paladin under the moon god. Neither knows of the other's existense. I would be hunted by Moonknight
Cortinarius, the half orc spores druid, and fur/leather trader. Im screwed. I'll be a matching jacket and boots before I can pause to wonder why that sparrow is giving me the side eye
A 6'8 Tabaxi vampire artificer rogue who has a 60ft fly speed, and has a +10 to stealth. What I do is try to convince him I'm not a threat, but depending on what he's been told, I'm just dead.
Torrin Sulgrax, the Brass Dragonborn Swashbuckler and my first character. Captured to be sold as a slave by pirates when he was younger, Torrin joined the other prisoners in leading a mutiny to take control of the ship. He became the first mate, having helped the mutiny’s leader plan everything, but after sailing together with everyone for a time he decided to return to land and sold his services as a bodyguard or escort. In my first (and so far only) campaign he was kind of the straightman for our party, able to keep his calm when dealing with townsfolk suspicious of our more magical party members since we were there to deal with a curse. He would often use his items to check for traps and help in combat, like dipping his fishing rod in a strange pond in the forest to see if anything was in there, or using a rope to find the path along a floor where there was an illusion to disguise a massive hole in a room, and dousing a boss in oil to light it on fire with his fire breath. This was a low level campaign where two of my friends were helping me and two others learn how to play. Two characters actually died due to really unlucky rolls but since we were new our DM decided to bring them back to life since one was our only PC veteran (the other was only DMing) and having one of the newbies die would have sucked. Though their revivals were at least explained. Cool thing is that each of our characters got to be the one to end an encounter throughout the campaign, just by chance, with Torrin getting the kill on the final boss (a mechanical bird) by shooting an arrow that pierced both its wings and grounded it. Given he was pretty reasonable I think I would have a decent enough chance of talking things out with him… but there’s no chance I would survive if he actually wanted me dead xD
A enclave power amrored soilder with a .50 cal ..yeah id say im fucked I guess its what i get for making him a purists Its from a fallout dnd game we did using 5e
I’m currently playing Worlds Without Number (another ttrpg like DnD with a few differences) so if something I describe shouldn’t normally be possible, that’s why. Meet Andrew Rothstein. His grandfather, Arnold Rothstein, came from a world very much like modern-day earth. Since there’s no magic on his world, he’s immune to magic, an ability which Andrew has a diluted version of (not that it matters in a fight against me). The Rothsteins own a pizza company that is a front for the “mafia” and have total control of an entire city. So Andrew has all of those resources to use against me. As for his combat prowess, he fights with his bare fists (which are more powerful than some swords) and has faced skilled guards, owlbears, lizard men, and geese. A few of his greatest feats: Strength: Collapsing a woman’s skull with one punch, carries an entire barrel of wine at all times, pulled his entire body weight onto a balcony with one hand and held a goose in the other Durability: Was repeatedly deafened by a giant bell, was briefly lit on fire, withstood extremely cold air Speed: Can move 40 feet in one combat round, dodged an attack from a giant So how well I would do comes down to one thing. Do I know that he’s hunting me? Because in a physical confrontation he would destroy me, but it’s a part of his backstory that he has a terrible sense of direction, so if I can get a headstart, he’d probably never find me
So there’s 2 ways of seeing this. There’s the most recent ttrpg character I’ve played, emma, and the most recent dnd 5e character ive played, viros. Emma would probably be the easier of the 2. She is a character from hunter: the vigil, and as such she’s basically just a normal human by herself (this is a tier 2 campaign, so while the dm has considered giving endowments as story beats we don’t start off with any). Despite this, she is scary good at stealth, larceny, wilderness survival, and especially firearms, with her weapon of choice being a shotgun she can successfully stow away in her coat (i.e. she’s always able to hide the fact she’s open-carrying a shotgun from the authorities). Her preferred strategy is to set up ambushes where she can pick me off from, so trying to avoid leaving myself alone in locations is very important. As for weaknesses, she has two: while she is amazing at firearms, she is completely unskilled at close combat. Forcing her into such a position with a weapon will likely allow me to have a better chance in taking her out. Also, as a hunter she has a unique code she follows, which can be exploited for my own benefit. If at all possible, she will not risk the lives of others in pursuit of prey, and will not risk ridding the world of important knowledge (i remember adding additional rules to her code, but these are the big 2 I remember). I could use these against her to prevent her from harming me Viros… viros is hard. The chaotic evil paladin of rakdos himself in my friend’s ravnica campaign, she is completely and 100% focused on killing people. She is faster than me, stronger than me, and is magically empowered by both her devotion to her oath and her guild. In a one-on-one confrontation, im fucked, but her bloodlust is also a weakness. She’s not a murderhobo per se, but she can easily be coaxed into violence, either at the proposition of a challenge or if someone pisses her off. If i can put her in a situation where someone gets in the way of her, she will likely kill them in broad daylight, and any police that come she’ll try to kill as well if she believes she is capable of doing so. She’s level 5, meaning she is powerful, but if the entire police force gets on her she can be very easily overpowered, all the while i try my best to run to safety away from the incredibly dangerous cat women trying to kill me. Its not fullproof, but its the best i can do considering her skills
Have a Chat with him. While he is utterly terrifying he doesn't kill without being forced to. He also is a stealthy, wise tracker with 24 strength thats 256cm tall and is much faster than me. So I write notes, wait at a well lit up place and sing while making music.
![[ ออกกอง ] วัยหนุ่ม 2544 โลกหลังลูกกรง..ทัวร์กองถ่ายหนังใน "คุกของจริง" | JUSTดูIT.](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/vB--aOkZCpw/mqdefault.jpg)
The last D&D character you played as is hunting you. What do you do?
What are you supposed to do besides die? Because unless you're not telling us something, we all have Commoner stats. What are we supposed to do against anything higher than level 2?
Easy! Offer him a skull, a beer, a kobold, and get ready to party!
@@redman7775 gun?
Mine has refused to do damage from levels 4 through 8 due to his moral code not allowing him to harm most creatures (exceptions include mindless or evil undead, and hostile fiends), so the life-domain cleric kobold would likely just be hunting me down to give me a stern lecture.
Nothing, he has a habit of getting chronically lost unless it's to find a tavern, and since I don't drink I think I'm good! I'm super happy that I tend to think about the penalties my character will take before I think about their positives, and making a character who literally can't ever find anything (as in purposefully rolls disadvantage on all perception, survival, persuasion, and investigation checks) would be an absolute dream in a situation where my last character has to find me.
That being said, if he got help finding me, there's no chance of me beating a lvl 20 Polearm Master Battlemaster that was turned pseudo-undead giving him the ability to turn to mist and fly with a 300 ft move speed PLUS a literal 'teleports behind you' attack (my DM hates that I named it 'Nothing Personal Kid'). No my only hope of survival is offer him good alcohol or a great adventure. He's also chaotic good, so I could try appealing to his better nature so long as I wasn't on the actual path of evil. But uh... no. No fighting. Just dead.
HA! I’d be hunted by my oath of the ancients paladin Christoph Greenthorne, a good old farmer boy turn holy crusader that worships the goddess of agriculture. The worst I’d have to deal with him is his talkative nature
Be careful he might bore you to death
That one villain from captain underpants
an 11th level necromancer that commands, at minimum, 18 orc skeletons.
Uh oh.
Rattle’em Boys!!
@@magoichi75*sans undertale music kicks in*
A level 11 undead half elf artificer alchnemist level 5, grave domain cleric level 6. Who protects stolen primordial texts of a world ending plague. ( their plague god wants the texts back too, but cannot take away their clerical abilities)
i would wake up, go eat breakfast, and immedatly die because his pet mimic put whyvern poison into my milk. Or some other arcane crafted disease, most likely not a fast one as he likes experimenting. Not saying he's evil, I could offer some knowledge and intregue him.
I've played dungeons and dragons once as an orc, things didn't go too well for me😢. Tho I do have some characters I once thought up so Idk if those count either
Galath Hadron is a 6’8 human barbarian with a 300lb stone slab of a sword that uses lightning magic, and raided with a tribe of orcs for 20 years. He hurled a great axe at a dracolich that was 120ft. in the sky, hit it in the neck and made it fall onto a lava-covered floor. He decapitated a storm giant with one swing, and castrated an ogre with a power slide.
Die. I’d fkn die.
nice
And with that power slide,.you wouldn't die hard 😂
I’d be dead. Level 20 character, finished his character arcs so he doesn’t really have much in the way of psychological weaknesses, and he’s the strongest character I’ve ever made. I’m talking 1v1 Tiamat while remaining above half health, being ready to do it again after a short rest. There’s a reason I named him “Chad the God Killer”
I don’t remember the details, but I used Paladin, Bard, and barbarian. I also had a bunch of magic items that I used to increase my AC and CHR.
The basic idea was to make my defenses so strong that I wouldn’t take much of any damage. My lowest save bonus was in the teens or twenties ish, any my AC was above 40. I don’t think I used armor, and I had an Epic Boon as well as an additional feat (due to our table’s homebrew rules that I’m pretty sure we had at the time).
It’s been a while since I used Chad.
With homebrew magic items?
Lv 20 characters are gods born as mortals
If Tiamat somehow couldn't land a physical attack she'd just dragons breath you every turn and stay out of your melee reach. You'd die no matter how good your resistances are or how high your saves are, because at best you're still taking half damage from breath attacks that do between 67 and 90+ damage per breath attack.
Now if you were talking about the Tarrasque, that would be easily doable even from a much lower level.
Get insurance. While Rita is a strong, super-fast literal bunny rabbit of a girl (Mutants and Masterminds, backstory is ‘bunch of scientists tried creating a slave army of human/animal hybrids, but played her in DnD as well, Shifter Monk), she’s also a sweetheart who won’t kill anyone who isn’t a machine or demon.
Best case scenario, she’ll ask me to give up. Worst case, I get a few broken bones.
yeah can't imagine the last character I played wanting to hurt someone who hasn't hurt her or someone she cares about.
A halfling rogue who crawled through a ceiling and walked right into a trap, activating a swinging axe. I WAS TOO SHORT FOR IT TO CUT OFF MY HEAD
LMFAO
That's amazing
KEKW THAT IS AMAZING
LMAO had a similar experience recently. We were playing a Waterdeep campaign, and ended up going throught the sewers. The DM said that we were going through a passage with about a foot of sewage. My character was 1 foot 5.
yeah another party member ended up carrying my sewage drenched hobo of a tabaxi after we realized that
Being hunted by an incredibly lucky, generally undying monk paladin multiclass?
I accept my fate.
not quite undying, but insanely durable as well: Warforged Battlemaster-Fighter-8/Zealot-Barbarian-4/Artillerist-Artificer-3/War-Wizard-2 with Shield Master feat and a sentient artifact-level adamantine-greatsword he and his creators collaborated in creating....
And yes, he also wears adamantine armor. So bringing him down isn't exactly easy. He was built to survive attrition-warfare, and it shows. Out of the 500 of his kin that went to war, by this point only around 20 are left... ...and he's one of them. And perhaps the most formidable of them.
My lore bard tells me my internet search history and I die.
LMFAO
Lol
Wait, is he casting it as Vicious Mockery?
@@ALJ9000 I think there's no need.
@@ALJ9000 if you shout based after every search result you avoid damage, heard it from a friend
A war forged artificer, cue the Terminator music. I'm dead
Dw im a similar level of fucked lol
My brother is in the same situation. One model is basically a Jedi, lightsaber included. The is a actual avatar of death.
R.I.P. both of you.
I'm playing a warforged necromancer wizard. So far loving the race.
Warforged paladin, Oath of Conquest. 20 AC at 3rd level...
I might survive if i surrender to him though, because he is hardcoded with the rules of engagement.
I hear you... Oh boy do I hear you....
Warforged Battlemaster-Fighter-8/Zealot-Barbarian-4/Artillerist-Artificer-3/War-Wizard-2 with Shield Master feat and a sentient artifact-level adamantine-greatsword he hand his creators collaborated in creating....
The one and only hope for survival is that he is not governed by emotions (although he very much experiences them). So if I can come up with a logical reason why killing me is a bad idea, then all is well. if not, well... at least he's only going to need one hit...
My current Pathfinder character is Darius - an elf with draconic ancestry, neat magic spells, great intimidation, and absolutely no physical coordination. In his first session, he took twenty minutes to scale a short cliff face, killed two snakes nesting in a log, then nearly died falling off said log three separate times.
To protect myself from being hunted by this clumsy beauty, I lay a downed tree in front of the door and go to bed without a care in the world.
Brillant, I love him.
i ask him to give me a 5 minute head start. since he has 0 sense of time, it should give me a few years to prepare
Or 5 seconds
Yeah... My room's being fireballed in 7 seconds.
Me, playing as an ace fighter pilot in a sci fi campaign with access to a dozen nuclear missiles:
*Hahahaha... I'M IN DANGER*
Half a dozen nukes? Comrade I believe WE are in danger
Pixy is that you?
@@samueljo7910 funny you mention that, I use that exact same character as a Project Wingman OC
Nah man, he being hunted down by Crimson 1
@@Naofumi-Iwatani FUNNY YOU MENTION THAT, he is also a Magadanian PK
I'd give him a hug and tell him "you're doing your best", he needs that a lot
I guess a heavily religious bird is going to be screaming encourgements at me??
(Owlin Cleric, he was, so, so, ecstatic all the time. And loud.)
Edit: I should also mention he had a really bad habit of accidentally assisting the enemy.
Sounds similar to my kobold, a life-domain cleric who, from levels 4 through 8, did not deal even a single point of damage. His moral code heavily restricts what he will cause harm to (mostly mindless/evil undead and fiends.).
Yooo I’m also making an Owlin cleric
Owls beloved
There is nothing I could do. He is silent, can be anywhere any time, and can be anything. Kenku Warlock hex blade with Bard College of Swords. Leveled to 28. He took control over the first level of Hell. He commands the army's of Hell. He can cast Disguise Self at will. He had a +25 to slight of hand checks. It was a very broken build. So much fun. But very broken.
Level 11 Chaotic Neutral Death Cleric Halfling with PTSD.
...If I'm lucky, I'll die. If I'm really lucky, I'll die quick.
Oof... not fun.
Hunted by a dragonborn ranger that was raised by dwarfs and praises Moradin....yeah im fucked
I'm lucky that in the last session I played, I introduced my new character of the campaign: An autognome battlesmith artificer who has a big humanoid robot for his steel defender. Frank (the Steel Defender) would probably be a pain to deal with, but Ketloy (the actual artificer) has a pistol. It was either them or a woman with a magical halberd of mercury who has managed to kill at least 10 royal soldiers and the most powerful sorcerer she has heard of (the King) all on her own. Not to mention the fact that if she knows that I was the one who created her backstory, then that would give her a strong explanation for why she'd be hunting me down.
My last character I played would depend on how close to the prompt we stick.
The last thing I ran was an NPC old master of a knight’s order well into his 60’s who missed _7 out of 8 attacks_ last combat.
He’s not _particularly_ chivalrous but he isn’t a murderer either. Probably just stay in my car and keep moving around 10 mph until the old man’s heart gave out or he changed his mind.
The last _PC_ I played was Jenta Tyvrane, an utterly ruthless Drow thief rogue whose unarmed attacks are about as dangerous as a short sword’s (level 3, with Martial Artist dedication).
I can’t outrun her (40 foot move speed).
I can’t out maneuver her (+4 Dex and good related skills).
My only hopes are either to get a gun and wait somewhere with a single entrance, convince her killing me does nothing to advance her master’s goals or protect the world as a whole, or _maybe_ overpower her as she has +0 strength in pathfinder (that’s a fairly big deal). Of course, she’s trained to take on larger, _trained_ opponents, so that last one is just a “YOLO” move.
And finally, my last _D&D 5e_ character is Anton Pierrovich, an old Rune Knight, ex-soldier who was flung through time to the campaign’s present time (level 4 Rune Knight).
Oddly enough, he’s the most likely to react calmly to suddenly being in the real world, as the leap to 2,000 years before the campaign to present campaign is probably just as shocking as going from the campaign to the real world.
I could explain that I don’t _know_ where his son ended up being flung, but I _do_ know he’s alive somewhere, and that every second he spends in my world is a second not spent in his looking for Nimir.
Again I could maybe hop on a highway and flee, but unlike the NPC he’s tough, strong, and determined, so that would take a long time.
He also uses a glaive and is like 6’4”, so maybe again holding a gun in a narrow, confined space would help.
The last character I made is for a modern-day setting and she is a red Dragonborn tinkerer whose job is to be a courier that drives a sports bike. Highly skilled and maneuverability and an escape artist when being pursued by people. Which in turn means that she is able to hunt down the person she is tasked to do so; in other words I am boned.
And it's lucky I'm in covering her and not her ancestor matchstick, who would plot My Demise by either blowing up my apartment complex or using me as an experiment if I pissed her off enough
I'd probably go and buy some cheese and buy a whole pig carcass, then hide
He was a pretty chill Astral Self monk who was slowly transforming into a Wendigo, and he had quite the soft spot for cheese
Get this man some cheese
I’m being hunted by the half astral elf half human gravity wizard Terrum, a young wize cracking, college graduate with a PHD in women’s studies, and an occasionally murderous strategist. He would find me with some divination spell, roll a 30 stealth somehow, and stalk me for 2 hours while deliberating about a plan, only to completely go off plan. He would knock me out and I would wake up in a bad of holding while he deliberated for another 2 hours about what to interrogate me on. Only for me to not have any information, and be thrown back into the bad to be forgotten and die of suffocation.
The PhD in Women's Studies is _terrifying_
They could just SJW-talk me to death 😂
Im being hunted by Vol'Ak a Githyanki who lost their whole squad of fellow gith to a mindflayer on the material plain. This was their first time on the material, so they were a fish out of water and stuck. They became a mercenary, and during one job, they accidentally killed the person they were hired to save. They and their group brutally dealt with the kidnappers to the point the hostage fought us in fear, and we only only knew they were the hostage after death. The hostage was a wizard planning their escape and didn't want to kill the captors, so they were taking their time. Until we came along. We rolled so many nat 20s we turned all those kidnappers to mush. Well, after that day of murder and trauma, Vol'Ak became a Redemption Paladin who desperately just wants to help those in need or who have strayed from the path of good. They arent wise, they find most people to be good, they love their parties buddy who is a lich of thay but my character doesnt know what that means and never has thought to distrust the "kind" wizard. They only dont trust you when you give a really good reason. And our party now babtsits them and sometimes points them towards a thing and says " Its evil go get it" and then Vol"Ak will go and ask "Hey are you evil?" And depending on the response, they either have a new friend or foe. They've made so many evil friends that they're confident are good or are on the path towards good. But if you are evil... they will pull out a hexblade and show you the wrath of love and kindness. They found a cursed sword, and i decided to go 1 level in hecblade and become buddies with my cursed sword. Make it do some good.
So I think I'd just have a new friend
Not to be dramatic but I would do anything for Vol'Ak. I love him, he's so sweet and I can totally see him accidentally turning people towards good just because he believes in them so much.
My character is this but in the different direction: a highly intelligent though a little sheltered canus (doggo) artificer/bard who would, quite literally, do anything for his friends. Good isn't the moral good - good is what his friends decide is good. He tries his best to also stay on the morally good part, mostly so his friends don't go down a path he knows they would regret, but hey if this dude made our casters life hell it's only fair he gets to learn just how long it takes for a person to die.
I'm getting hunted by a shape-shifting artificer that can read minds, I'm probably dead
My wood-elf werewolf barbarian, Fennis, is now hunting me. The good news is he was also formerly a monk, so he’d likely be willing to negotiate or talk through things rather than solve conflict with violence (his stat rolls were stupid good so I figured I’d put some stats into dex and wis and have his backstory be he was a monk before he got bitten and was exiled from his order).
I’d be hunted by a sorcerer, WITH A GOD CREATOR CHICKEN FOR A FRIEND, AND A CHICKEN WHOSE EGGS BEND REALITY INTO CHAOS FOR A PET. Yeah I’m screwed
Garrett, a halfling druid, mounted on a fasteith (a really fast dino from Eberon) named "stich."
I'm out ranged and out run. But the impending chase is making it on the internet
I’d sit down and pray that tzeench would find it funny to deny him of a kill.
Either that or I’d sit down huddled in a corner attempting to look as pathetic as possible as his code prevents him from claiming skulls he feels would be unworthy for Khorne to sit upon(also know as “he doesn’t kill the weak… usually”) the only exception would be if it was a directive straight from Khorne that a specific individual must die or if the weakling was somehow preventing him from arriving at a proper battle
He is a level 20 warforged oath of conquest paladin who worships the blood god Khorne named Baerakus who duel wields lances while riding a huge sized bear, both covered in adamantine full plate. (The bear is an artificer/druid/paladin played by a friend of mine.)
1. He Is himself a large creature(magic item)
2. His mere presence exudes such terror on anyone around him that their minds literally rend themselves apart.
3. His AC is at an almost permanent 32 with adamantine armor which means I quite literally can’t hurt him in any way as his armor has exactly zero weak spots and I am certainly no tarrasque
4. He does not need to eat, drink, or sleep so if he is hunting me down in particular then he has exactly zero reason to stop.
5. He is effectively immortal as a warforged so I’m not outliving him.
6. He has a back up great sword just in case someone gets too close so I wouldn’t be inconveniencing him all that much by closing the distance.
7. His aura while you are frightened by it also prevents you from moving so I’m not going to be able to flee.
8 he has a 14 in wisdom with expertise in perception so I’m not hiding from him(feat: skill expert)
I'm not worried at all, I'd be hunted by my Redemption Paladin. He won't kill me, he's the most morally upstanding character I have ever played lol. If it was any of the previous 3 characters I'd played before the Paladin I'd be dead lol
I would be chilling at my house before he divine smited me into next week
Ah the mere thought of having to fight a death cleric who can out heal anything I try to hurt them with it terrifying
My kobold wizard wouldn't hesitate to dance on my grave
I’m a paladin fighter Dragonborn, in a set of heavy armor. Just run a lot
Man, I’m glad it’s not accurate to real life, the real ones are faster than soldiers, and can do basically anything that they can do WITHOUT armour, besides maybe sink or take it off within the hour.
If we are doing campaign AND oneshot characters, my hunter would be an old mechanic with a love for the craft and assorted teas. There would be no need to fight. He is a peaceful man.
If oneshots dont count however...
Anchor306 is a warforged eldritch knight specialising in crossbows and all things ranged (sharpshooter feat). Reflavoured as a robot crafted by dwarves, designed for atmosphereless-zero g environments. Anchor wields a coil rifle that fires tungston rods for said exploration.
Anchor was my first time powergaming a character (not without rp or personality ofc). My best and only hope would be to short circuit his memory banks as part of his character is that he was offline in the bottom of an ocean for soooooo long that his memory storage just rusted away. It would have to be triggered from intense questioning.... If I even had the time to do that.
What do I do? Offer him a skull, a beer, a kobold, and get ready to party!
What, does he fuck kobolds or something?
We don’t HAVE kobolds
@@Aaa-vp6ug Well then, I don't know what else to say except enjoy your life before a barbarian comes a crashing through your door⚔
@@CrazyHawkeComics this is YOUR hou-
*(Stabbed by door)*
Why did I play a mimic-
My last D&D character was Johnathan S. Duct Tape, an artificer who used duct tape for like 90% of his abilities. This MF also had “Gun Chucks”, a pair of guns that he attached to opposite ends of a chain.
He also had: Bagpipes, A 7/11 sign, 2 Coffee machines, a tiger named “Got Cheeto”, and LSD that he got from Loki.
I’m most likely screwed.
My rock gnome artificer kinda became the party diplomat/therapist. He had a decanter of endless water and a homebrew item called the gooey gooey chocolate chip cookie ring. He would make me cry, but probably also better. His name is Rothan Whitestone.
That is so sweet, my heart-
Oh I’d be absolutely screwed. Level 18 divination wizard. I’d be found by scrying then either be warped to another dimension, disintegrated or sucked into a black hole. And I’d have no chance of living cause of good ol’ portent. At least she’s somewhat kind, but she does get the job done.
The character before that was a lvl 20 zealot barbarian who used a sword the size of a five story building so honestly I’d be red paste if any of the last like five characters of mine jumped me.
Last thing I played was a Thrii-kreen Graviturgy Wizard named Roach Limit.
With fire bolt and Phantom Steed, fighting them would be extremely challenging.
Did you make this character exclusively for the pun, or was that just a nice bonus? Either way…. Good one
I'd just have to wait like, 5 years tops, old-ass champion fighter
As a forever dm, im dead!
My spell dwarf that knows every trolls name
Mushu, the level 20 rogue/assassin half-elf, neutral evil. He’s covered head-toe in tattoos of weapons that when touched, produce said weapon from the ether (magically stowed weapons, if you will). He formed one of the largest assassins guild and one of the few that actually employs Naztharune assassins.
He was my character from our first and longest running 3.5 campaign.
I wouldn’t worry about him hunting me. There’s clearly nothing I can do about it and might as well enjoy whatever time I have left.
Last character was a level 10 Divine Soul Sorcerer named Wilos who only acts normal around her companions. If I’m an enemy I should just accept that I am utterly fucked. She will probably just hit me with one lightning bolt or something and I just end up as a pile of ash. Like I said, fucked.
Absolutely nothing can stop me from dying to a lightning bolt now
Yeah I'm dead af, my last character was a level 15 red dragonborn oath of vengeance paladin named Arcturus Belldura (first name after a very large star). He started as oath of conquest serving vecna as a lawful evil warlord and after being betrayed by vecna swore vengeance on him and anyone else that would get in his way, so if he doesn't see me as a threat then I'm good, but if he's hunting me then I'm fucked. He had a Pegasus, haste and all sorts of smites, he has been shot several times (we had a gunslinger) and he wasn't that beat up. He had all sorts of magical items that made him an absolute animal to fight and personally I don't see myself walking away from this alive. Oh and fun fact he did get his vengeance on vecna in the end of our campaign by grappling him, preventing him from talking and made him watch as my buddies Annihilated what was left of his guards after Arcturus tore through them, scary mf
I'm going to be yiffed by a hot bear druid dude
Oh, I am cosmically fucked. There is literally no scenario where I even survive this.
For context, in the current campaign I'm playing in, we all are humans transported from a different version of Earth into a magical world, isekai-style.
And my character, Kane Bridgemaker, is the fucking CEO of a multi-billion dollar company called "Valiant". He does not care for others, the only exception to this rule being his sister, and has no problem ruthlessly murdering someone, if it furthers his goals.
Now that isn't the worst part. The worst part is that he's a bard, and that we rolled our stats. And I rolled a fucking 90. So he has (with other modifiers applied of course) 14 STR, 18 DEX, 15 CON, 14 INT, 14 WIS, and 20 CHA. He ALSO is part of a special bloodline that makes his vicious mockery do d8 dice damage instead of d4. He ALSO has the tough feat, making him have as much HP as our fucking tank, and misty step.
This man wouldn't kill me, he'd fucking erase me from history, if not in hand to hand combat, he'd just have to write a single text on his phone and a fucking army of hired guns and hackers would make sure that I'd be forgotten forever.
Even if I somehow got my hands on his sister to like blackmail him into leaving me alone, he'd find a fucking way to get around that, even if he doesn't have his company and wealth backing him. Like, wtf do I do against the Sleep Spell?
My last character was a psychopathic murderer who would probably still kill me even though he’s level four at the moment. If we were to fast forward a few more sessions I would be mega screwed because the DM has let us know that we can take it to godhood if we wanted.
Become a human experiment
Sorcerer who’s neutral evil and modifies his own body with magic and does human experiments
Stock up on cat treats and hope my offering appeases the great Mr. Tiddles.
As the DM, the last character I voiced was “SLAMBO” the Glabrizu.
I’m just gonna off myself instead of waiting for a brick shit house to cause as much chaos as possible on his way to murder me as violently as possible.
Level 1 Halfling rogue with staggering advantage on dex and stealth, very good at archery with a short bow (witch they have) and a shield
Im chillin. My last character was a war-forged bard that was made out of wood and was given the power of the wind to aid in their ability to play music. My new character that I’m currently playing as, is an extremely home-brewed insanely powerful Half-Orc barbarian with an overwhelming constitution modifier of +56, and that’s not even his highest modifier bonus. New guy wins.
Oh I'm screwed. A neutral sorcerer that can move at blinding speeds and his strongest feat being a twinned empowered FiREbAll that was able to obliterate a storm giant. As well as instantly kill an army of 50 orcs, including a vice general and general.
Yeah I'm fucked. He's a reborn warlock on a quest to remake the world in his own image, and get revenge on the greedy. He has a magical scythe with a connection to an ancient greater daemon. And he's also gay. So either I'm fucked because he'll kill me. Or I'm fucked very literally.
Oh... I played a Dark Fairy called Jack Frost... I'm so dead. If I'm lucky, he will do it quick.
A writer and reporter who has been chasing me because she wants to hear my story so bad? I'll just submit, tell her everything and then ask her to let her friend comfort me.
I'd invest in fire extinguishers. V is a draconic bloodline sorcerer with a almost solely fire based spell list and a pretty good incineration track record.
Good thing that he is the last character I played though, and not the 20 AC war machine that is my beloved Warforged paladin "Brick", who I played for a little one shot. My only shot for surviving against him would be to surrender because he was hardcoded to follow the rules of engagement.
Mine was a homebrew WW1 campaign he’s a dhampir engineer. He gouged out a man’s eye with a wrench and punched a man’s jaw so hard it nearly fell of and got labeled as a psychopath. Tf do I do
Well I had a aspiring necromancer of a doctor/oracle who isn’t a particularly good fighter, more of a assholeish healer, so if I keep on the run and out of the range of the worst of his spells I should be fine.
Good thing too since last campaign ended recently and that guy became a god!
I play a Mimic(The characters don't know but the players and DM know) in Full Armor named Steel Ichornose who talks with paper and pencil and I'm just going to say I'm dead
Get a rat. (he has severe ptsd since last session)
I've only played DND once, and that wasn't with my own character. However, I do have a character already in mind. He's a Dragonborn Artificer who took the Alchemist route. My idea is he's a Green Dragonborn, giving him a poison breath weapon and poison resistance. He uses it to create his potions and forage for ingredients respectively.
I have to deal with a lizard man who can make bombs.
I never thought I'd be chased down by a chicken wielding a longsword until now
I'd just be fucked, (I play a custom version with less rules and no classes because me and my friends don't know how to play proper DnD) my dude can summon any creature, real, extinct, video game character, TV show character, book character, or other animals and other shit, e.g. ARKS GIGA, Owlman,THE BLOOP and so on. He can also shoot unnaturally strong and thin steel wires that he has complete control over, just like how he has complete control over his summons. He can also open a black void that can pull any weapon from up to modern times. If my friends did this challenge, and our characters teamed up, we'd be fucked even more like one of the characters are a GLITCH IN THE UNIVERSE with mind control, demonic summoning, wall phasing, and teleportation. There is also one who has slain MULTIPLE EARTH DRAGONS and has armor made from those scales with a great sword serrated with the teeth of said dragons, he also has a gilded long bow with nichilin tipped arrows. The next one is a water based dragon born who has forearms that can transform at will between wings, hands, and claws while dual wielding nichirin great swords and being able to use light magic and invisibility spells. One more has the ability to control and enhance plant life while being a sadistic master poison brewer who can brew colourless, odorless, untraceable poison in mere seconds. The final one so far is a duchess who owns 2 swords and 2 throwing axes that can fuse with each other (I mean like the swords can fuse and and same for the axes) and when unfused, the swords can control the elements like from atla minus air and when fused the swords become extremely effective at hurting beings of dark and light while the axes both fused and unfused can control the winds and boomerang back when thrown. Safe to to say, *We. Are. Fucked.*
I'd be dead. Lvl 7 blood rager barbarian wyvarin who dual wields axes. Chaotic neutral ex gang muscle. The only way I would live is if I could pay him more than his employer or if he knew my past and would let me disappear if I had the money for it.
Well, i don’t think anyone could survive being hunted by a level 12 elven rouge. I don’t need to though, since lucky for me, that campaign ended last week! Instead, i have to face a 4ft tall level 2 tabaxi artificer. Still intimidating, as he has a tendency to catapult molotovs, but at least i have a chance, and at least it would be harder for a character who is obviously nonhuman to traverse the world and get to me. I mean, he’s 4 feet tall! I could throw him out a window if he got close enough!
All i could really do is prepare. My main plan: use his own tricks against him. Make a healthy amount of molotovs, grab all the weapons i can, and probably make armor out of various kitchen implements. Sure, a cast iron breastplate will be heavy and brittle, but maybe duct tape and prayers will make it hold up.
My last character was a black level 4 dragonborn ranger named Gorija that has a pet baby wyvern and baby ankylosaurus named Rodan and Angirus respectivly.
Im just fucked man.
Welp, I'm fucked.
I used to be a forever dm. A player wanted to do a ww2 isekai into fantasy world.
Im getting chased by a Conquest paladin who thinks he is a actual tool with minimal free will.
He was told to be a soldier since the day he was born, and We are only a few sessions in.. He hasn't had his character arc.
Im going to get Eather Double smited. Or shot it the head by a holy m1 garand.
My character ended his story becoming a god I am doomed 💀
‘That Player’s are shaking in their boots rn
Id try to attempt to be a follower of their god of chaos most likely won't work
pray for me guys.. HE PUNCHED DEATH IN THE FACE AND SOLOED THE FINAL BOSS WITH EASE IM DOOMED!!!
Gun. He was a bird.
I mean kenku.
I like how most of us just accepted our faith and just lay down to die
Bruce, a human Cleric of Heironeous; basically if gym bros had a religion about being gym bros... I'd probably be fine. But just to be sure, I'd hire my first ever character so he can't do the same; a wood elf Ranger with the Urban Bounty Hunter background.
Ha, jokes on you, I’ve never played DnD. I just make characters.
Editors notes need to be bigger. They’re hilarious and I always miss them lol
Kellach, Warforged Barbarian wielding a massive two handed hammer on a revenge quest. He’s not too bright and afraid of heights, so tricking him to a cliff side and stranding him there would be a good start. Lots of ways to make him fall to his death.
So I made a D&D character but never played D&D so I’m hunted by a haft in reality and haft not
I am being hunted by basically Moonknight. Gladin/Vormak = Stephen/Marc. In the campaign they're from, there is a form of fast-travel: basically each major population center has a large Soul Crystal, and every indivivdual has a Soul Stone. When the person wants to fast travel, they activate their Soul Stone, which connects to a Soul Crystal, and transforms their matter into soul energy which travels through the Soul Plane and then is reconstituted at the destination. Some terrorists were screwing with a Soul Crystal just as Galdin and Vormak were coming out of it, causing it to explode. Vormak's body was reconstitued and his soul put into it, but the crystal glitched with Gladin and thought that Vormak's body was his, so both their souls were fused and put into the same body, altering Gladin's memories to match Vormak's. They both died due to the explosion, which is when the moon god made a pact with Vormak to bring him back as a warlock in return for Vormak to serve him. When Gladin woke up, "his" body had magic moon powers so he became a paladin under the moon god. Neither knows of the other's existense. I would be hunted by Moonknight
Cortinarius, the half orc spores druid, and fur/leather trader. Im screwed.
I'll be a matching jacket and boots before I can pause to wonder why that sparrow is giving me the side eye
A 6'8 Tabaxi vampire artificer rogue who has a 60ft fly speed, and has a +10 to stealth.
What I do is try to convince him I'm not a threat, but depending on what he's been told, I'm just dead.
I scream "CALLIOPE!" at random moments.
Torrin Sulgrax, the Brass Dragonborn Swashbuckler and my first character. Captured to be sold as a slave by pirates when he was younger, Torrin joined the other prisoners in leading a mutiny to take control of the ship. He became the first mate, having helped the mutiny’s leader plan everything, but after sailing together with everyone for a time he decided to return to land and sold his services as a bodyguard or escort.
In my first (and so far only) campaign he was kind of the straightman for our party, able to keep his calm when dealing with townsfolk suspicious of our more magical party members since we were there to deal with a curse. He would often use his items to check for traps and help in combat, like dipping his fishing rod in a strange pond in the forest to see if anything was in there, or using a rope to find the path along a floor where there was an illusion to disguise a massive hole in a room, and dousing a boss in oil to light it on fire with his fire breath.
This was a low level campaign where two of my friends were helping me and two others learn how to play. Two characters actually died due to really unlucky rolls but since we were new our DM decided to bring them back to life since one was our only PC veteran (the other was only DMing) and having one of the newbies die would have sucked. Though their revivals were at least explained.
Cool thing is that each of our characters got to be the one to end an encounter throughout the campaign, just by chance, with Torrin getting the kill on the final boss (a mechanical bird) by shooting an arrow that pierced both its wings and grounded it.
Given he was pretty reasonable I think I would have a decent enough chance of talking things out with him… but there’s no chance I would survive if he actually wanted me dead xD
Kobold Battlesmith Artificer with a penchant for using monster parts to make things.
Welp, im dead! XD
A frog. He’s an expert at finding things (such as humans) and snap open my rib cage with ease
A enclave power amrored soilder with a .50 cal ..yeah id say im fucked
I guess its what i get for making him a purists
Its from a fallout dnd game we did using 5e
A drunk dwarf fighter
I’m fine
I’m currently playing Worlds Without Number (another ttrpg like DnD with a few differences) so if something I describe shouldn’t normally be possible, that’s why.
Meet Andrew Rothstein. His grandfather, Arnold Rothstein, came from a world very much like modern-day earth. Since there’s no magic on his world, he’s immune to magic, an ability which Andrew has a diluted version of (not that it matters in a fight against me). The Rothsteins own a pizza company that is a front for the “mafia” and have total control of an entire city. So Andrew has all of those resources to use against me.
As for his combat prowess, he fights with his bare fists (which are more powerful than some swords) and has faced skilled guards, owlbears, lizard men, and geese.
A few of his greatest feats:
Strength: Collapsing a woman’s skull with one punch, carries an entire barrel of wine at all times, pulled his entire body weight onto a balcony with one hand and held a goose in the other
Durability: Was repeatedly deafened by a giant bell, was briefly lit on fire, withstood extremely cold air
Speed: Can move 40 feet in one combat round, dodged an attack from a giant
So how well I would do comes down to one thing. Do I know that he’s hunting me? Because in a physical confrontation he would destroy me, but it’s a part of his backstory that he has a terrible sense of direction, so if I can get a headstart, he’d probably never find me
Are we talking about BG3 or DND? And if it’s DND, is it the last character I CREATED or PLAYED? Because either way, I’m still fucking screwed.
So there’s 2 ways of seeing this. There’s the most recent ttrpg character I’ve played, emma, and the most recent dnd 5e character ive played, viros.
Emma would probably be the easier of the 2. She is a character from hunter: the vigil, and as such she’s basically just a normal human by herself (this is a tier 2 campaign, so while the dm has considered giving endowments as story beats we don’t start off with any). Despite this, she is scary good at stealth, larceny, wilderness survival, and especially firearms, with her weapon of choice being a shotgun she can successfully stow away in her coat (i.e. she’s always able to hide the fact she’s open-carrying a shotgun from the authorities). Her preferred strategy is to set up ambushes where she can pick me off from, so trying to avoid leaving myself alone in locations is very important. As for weaknesses, she has two: while she is amazing at firearms, she is completely unskilled at close combat. Forcing her into such a position with a weapon will likely allow me to have a better chance in taking her out. Also, as a hunter she has a unique code she follows, which can be exploited for my own benefit. If at all possible, she will not risk the lives of others in pursuit of prey, and will not risk ridding the world of important knowledge (i remember adding additional rules to her code, but these are the big 2 I remember). I could use these against her to prevent her from harming me
Viros… viros is hard. The chaotic evil paladin of rakdos himself in my friend’s ravnica campaign, she is completely and 100% focused on killing people. She is faster than me, stronger than me, and is magically empowered by both her devotion to her oath and her guild. In a one-on-one confrontation, im fucked, but her bloodlust is also a weakness. She’s not a murderhobo per se, but she can easily be coaxed into violence, either at the proposition of a challenge or if someone pisses her off. If i can put her in a situation where someone gets in the way of her, she will likely kill them in broad daylight, and any police that come she’ll try to kill as well if she believes she is capable of doing so. She’s level 5, meaning she is powerful, but if the entire police force gets on her she can be very easily overpowered, all the while i try my best to run to safety away from the incredibly dangerous cat women trying to kill me. Its not fullproof, but its the best i can do considering her skills
"Dread it, run from it, destiny arrives all the same."
Back myself into a corner and never sleep. Stealth modifier of +14
I run towards the nearest well!
Falling into wells is his weakness!
Have a Chat with him. While he is utterly terrifying he doesn't kill without being forced to.
He also is a stealthy, wise tracker with 24 strength thats 256cm tall and is much faster than me.
So I write notes, wait at a well lit up place and sing while making music.
A short warforged grave cleric that has one year left to live before he permanently malfunctions, it's so sad that it has to end that way.